I've improved significantly since discovering TRP, and went from a weak feminized coward that didn't know anything about women to someone who can consistently get HB5 and 6s, spins plates and has a decent body. I'm ambitious as fuck and of course I'm not even close to where I want to be, but I know the steps, and I'm taking them

There is this one thing that's killing me though: I'm still afraid of rejection, ego-invested in it, and because of that I still can't shake that feeling of "not being ready" to approach any girl who I consider more attractive than myself (my major buffer to not approaching, I'd say)

I thought I was slowly getting past these feelings, but recently a situation kicked me in the nuts: Me and a friend of mine started talking at the same time with an HB8 in facebook. We kinda entered an "amicable" competition to see who would get her, and although I don't think he fucked her (because she is hot and he is kinda pathetic tbh), he at least got a date, while I was ghosted after some time. The thing is: the guy is a pushover, an extremely non-confrontational skinny fat beta who had oneitis for his HB5 ex who dumped him the second she got into college. I don't give a shit about that specific facebook girl, but "losing" to him in that situation just made me... really unconfortable

And then I realized I was still far from getting over it, and that I still unconsciouly derive a great portion of my emotional well-being from girls and being rejected (and worse, dropped in favour of a lower value guy) did a huge blow at my self-esteem, at least for a few days

How should I proceed to change that? Stoicism? Meditation? Getting rejected a million times on purpose? Apparently my strategies aren't working as well. I really wish I could just don't give a fuck about rejection, but I don't even know anymore if it is possible