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To The Young Virgin Red Pillers: Give It Time

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UpperRedSide
July 29, 2019
823 upvotes
TheRedPill

Relax.

I see you lifting.

I see you watching what you put in your body.

I see you reading, and learning, meeting new people and taking on new hobbies.

I see you working your ass off and making smart money moves.

But you still haven’t gotten laid. At this point you’ve internalized enough TRP literature to fill a library, and still nothing.

You’re frustrated. Probably wondering what’s gone wrong, or questioning whether this shit works.

Relax.

Give it a little time. Not even a lot of time. Just a little.

I was a kissless virgin for all nineteen years of my life. I moved out, started looking at the world through red lenses, and rapidly built my self into someone impressive. Two months on my own and I started whining about how I still couldn’t get laid. Two more months of building my social life from nothing since I wasn’t allowed out of the house when living with my parents, and I found myself in a situation where the logistics where right.

Even when you have the girl alone with you, there still will be a large step between talking or whatever you’re doing to kissing and foreplay. I’m just warning you. The first time taking that step will scare the shit out of you, and even the second and third times will be scary as well.

But stop worrying about it. You’re telegraphing desperation it’s coming out of your pores and scaring people off.

Calm down. You’re doing okay. Give it time.


Post Information
Title To The Young Virgin Red Pillers: Give It Time
Author UpperRedSide
Upvotes 823
Comments 132
Date 29 July 2019 06:46 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/247342
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/cj7ky5/to_the_young_virgin_red_pillers_give_it_time/
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Comments

[–]medicineandsports291 points292 points  (17 children) | Copy

I wish all young men had this type of honest guidance and support

[–]yakubyakubb90 points91 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep, got into redpill recently and I am 25

[–]Dionysus-VIOLENCE81 points82 points  (14 children) | Copy

it seems like this generation has been the least educated on women. every year you see more and more studies saying less highschoolers are dating... its sad

[–]KagoKija76 points77 points  (8 children) | Copy

video games, iphones, guys validing girls on social media... yeah it's gonna get worse. Thank fuck this resource exists to at least give some men the opportunity to change their ways.

[–]foomasters50 points51 points  (4 children) | Copy

You forgot to mention porn.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I find porn gets boring once you actually start getting laid. I like to grab a girl, slap her, kiss her, grab her tits, fuck her.

can't do any of that if i'm watching porn. its unsatisfying.

[–]DellaAbel 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy

I know it's bad, but just how bad is it?

[–]p3n1x20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy

Porn fucks up your frame and mental state. It is bad for woman also. Look up "death grip and porn", there is also a female version.

I feel pretty confident in my ability to take care of my partner from years of experiences. However, you will run into someone every once in a while that can only get off in a specific position or single type of stimulation.

Some people overcome the psychological barriers, some don't. Porn intensifies these barriers immensely, and more so for men.

[–]foomasters6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Delayed ejaculation, or no ejaculation at all with a partner.

No erections/soft erections, or erections that go away quickly. This could leave a deep scar if you are on a ONS with a girl from the club, and she shames you for not being able to get it up.

Performance anxiety from the last time. This problem compounds so badly, and you'd need a pretty stable mind during sex to not think about the failures and just focus on the woman.

[–]Obermarschall3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

not only that but some women also don't really take care of themselves, so you as man are not really motivated to do anything with them.

[–]KagoKija1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

too true. more arrogant, obnoxious, toxic obese feminists with dyed blue hair and septum piercings nowadays. the amount of quality girls is high albeit narrowing. all the more reason to use trp to become the best a man can becone

[–]ZeppKfw21 points22 points  (0 children) | Copy

Have you seen how indecisive and pussy pedestalizing teenage guys are? It's no surprise to me.

[–]not_a_NSA_person2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

The boys in our society need help, we are failing them as a group. Getting laid and feeling like you're worth a damn go hand in hand.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Social media has young people exploring sex alot more with alot more different people, in Norway the sheer amount of people having sex with eachother is enormous and it has never been a better time to explore your sexual identity.

That said though it is true I see more and more young people (my generation) not understanding the game because other distractions take hold early. SMV education gets put off till the crave gets too much and causes depression. The ones with natural game and early SMV education takes pretty much all the best game out there.

[–]Dionysus-VIOLENCE1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

im talking about the USA, Europeans are straight up degenerates in my experience and indiscriminately have sex with anyone

[–]massivewang89 points90 points  (8 children) | Copy

Hard work over time pays off.

When I TRPed at 27 I was fucking pissed, disgusted, distraught, frustrated, etc. I spent ten years as a people pleasing overly zealous evangelical Christian, 10-15 hours a week doing religious activity. I thought during this time I was improving myself and becoming a man, but in reality I did nothing to address the underlying issues. I thought I had wasted my life and was overwhelemd by the ugly truth that it might take years to turn my life around.

With that said after about three years all of the anger and disgust faded away because I turned my shit around. I am in the best spot I’ve ever been physically, emotionally, and financially. Some of the improvements came quickly (lost 30 lbs in three months). Others took more time (saying no, building boundaries, etc).

Seven years after word I really can’t believe where I’m at, it’s a complete 180 from who I was. It’s a bit strange to think about it. I’m not chad the destroyer rich and famous confident superstar, but I’m way fucking better than I was.

In finance there’s the commonly discussed principal of compound interest. Meaning that when you invest, the way interest accumulates allows your investment growth to far outpace what you’ve contributed ( I.e. 5,000 a year over 30 years is only $150,000 but you can potentially end up with $1,000,000 by the end of that time period). I believe that other areas in life “compound” as well when you put in consistent effort.

To sum it up, don’t give up. It may take a year or five years, but it will come. And once it starts coming it won’t stop.

Good luck and keep your head up!

[–]RightHandWolf26 points27 points  (2 children) | Copy

Aaaaaaaaaannnnnd . . . .

Success has a funny way of compounding itself over time as well. You put in the work, it starts paying off, which gives you more confidence and encourages you to ramp up your efforts even more, which leads to further success . . .

Think of all those schlubs that rush out to get a gym membership around the first week of January. They go a few days a week for a few weeks, bitch about their lack of progress and ultimately throw in the towel by Spring Break. There is no cheat code for doing the work. It sucks that we're not natural Chad's, with 12 inches of dangling death capable of dealing 2200 hit points of damage with every thrust, but the only way to achieve the results is to do the work. Hang tough, and in a couple of years you'll laugh at how much harder you made it by overthinking things.

[–]usegao9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

i know the 12 inch dangler was hyperbole, but i want to remind people that the average length is 5.64 inches, with a girth of 4.65 inches. if you are 5 inches around or more, get a bigger condom. don't let your penis suffocate over the world's delusional perception of penis size. use this chart:

https://i.imgur.com/S1NjqR7.png

[–]RightHandWolf12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

Of course the 12 inch remark was a joke. I can't imagine being that underendowed./s

[–]betachadtries3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hey your background sounds exactly like what I’m recently coming out of. It’s definitely tough. Glad to see you making it on the other side

[–]SeasonedRP3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

The compound interest analogy is a good one and why I don't recommend solely focusing on self improvement. Learn to interact with women when you are young. It may be awkward at first, but you'll get better, and eventually the results will compound and one day you'll be quite skilled at it. But to get there, you have to take those first steps.

[–]togetherforyou2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Fantastic that you were able to accept the past and move forward instead of going down the rabbit hole as any normal other human being could do.

[–]massivewang7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

I mean it was clear to me/pragmatic that I only had two options:

1.) accept the brutal truth and do my best to improve

2.) whine and bitch and be a victim.

Only one of these offered any real hope. As hard as #1 is, it’s worth the result. It’s just that the results might take years of hard work.

[–]usegao6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

good point. if you are going to suffer either way, you might as well suffer in the right direction.

[–]semaxX149 points150 points  (11 children) | Copy

And even if it takes more time... A) You cant force it anyway B) Sex shouldnt be your only/biggest goal in life C) Life should be interesting enough to distract you from not having sex most of the time

[–]relationship_padawan53 points54 points  (10 children) | Copy

Outcome independence.

Sex and women should be the cherry on the sundae of life.

[–]420KUSHBUSH18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy

"cherry on the sundae of life"

Pun intended?

[–]kray6711 points12 points  (8 children) | Copy

I like my sundaes with a cherry on top. Make that ass drop.

[–]DellaAbel 1 points [recovered]  (7 children) | Copy

Damn didn't expect to see a reference to that J. Cole song on this sub lmao.

[–]kray671 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

I would. Dude has tons of RP shit in his songs. I'm not even a big fan of hip-hop in general but I've recently got really into J.Cole.

[–]DellaAbel 1 points [recovered]  (5 children) | Copy

I'm a big fan of his. Got any examples of some RP style stuff he's said?

[–]kray674 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Niggas so thirsty it irks me
You keep on putting bitches over money but that ain't my cup of tea though
Nah nigga, the game is to get
A bunch of paper just to change your fucking neighbors and shit
I swear if niggas put half
Of what they put in chasing ass into a craft
By now you'd be famous and rich
But I get it, you rather lay with a bitch
While you play with her pussy, and let her play with your dick,
She thinking she got a first round pick
She thinking bout all the things she can get
She thinking you got a range for a whip
And a fly ass cribbo, but it's not that simple cause
All you got is a phone full of bitches, and they just like her
Meanwhile I'm stacking paper up, my word
Had more hoes coming than a bus driver
- 'Is She Gon Pop'

[–]kray674 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

She deserved that, she a bird, it's a bird trap
You think if I didn't rap she would flirt back
Takin' off her skirt, let her wear my shirt before she leave
I'ma need my shirt back
Nigga you know how it go
One time for my LA sisters
One time for my LA hoes
Lame niggas can't tell the difference
One time for a nigga who knows
Don't save her, she don't wanna be saved
- 'No Role Modelz'

[–]kray672 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nothing's impossible
And all you lame niggas show me what not to do
I met a real bad bitch in the club tonight
She told me, "Watch the snakes cause they watching you"
I told her, "Aw baby don't start!
I ain't looking for the way to your heart!"
She said, "You bout to miss church" while she riding me
I like my sundaes with a cherry on top
Make that ass drop (drop, drop)

In her mind she calling me a misogynist nigga
On some Bobby Brown shit my prerogative
Nigga is to hit and never commit
Now realizing when I hit she never forgets
So every time I ignore the telephone call
Saying I'll hit her back knowing I'm never gon' call
- 'Land of the Snakes'

[–]kray672 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I ain't fuck her, but I'm thinking 'bout it
My niggas say why you gotta think about it?
The bitch want too much, hit my phone too much
If I gotta be frank about it, ain't worth the stress
First the text, then the draws, see first the sex
Then it's calls cause the bird's obsessed
Want flowers, cards, and the purses next
Nah, bitch can't get a dollar
Cole on twitter, bitch can't get a follow
Can get a nut, heard "can't get enough"
Now she fuck a nigga thinkin' that she may hit the lotto
No way, Jose
Could write a book called, "the things hoes say"
Show a lot of love to my sisters though
But these bitches so predictable
- 'Trouble'

[–]UpperRedSide[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Op checking in.

Holy shit I’m going right to Apple Music and downloading these songs. I hate rap but I think I’ll make an exception here.

[–]Emit_M34 points35 points  (21 children) | Copy

Any tips for a 19yr old with no social life or friends at all

[–]someonesopinion696934 points35 points  (0 children) | Copy

get a life. get some hobbies, do you work? if so, get a job.

if you don't like anyone. that's on you

[–]massivewang22 points23 points  (2 children) | Copy

There’s a two prong approach here:

  • Pragmatic right now - for example what are your hobbies and or interests? Are there any local clubs/meetings you can join/go to to meet people?

  • deep dive long term - are you socially awkward? Lack people skills? Then you’re on the long term path to understand why and what you need to do to fix those root issues.

Your approach will involve both of these things - there will be pragmatic steps to fix your long term issues as well.

It will be a journey and it won’t be easy, but don’t give up. In five years everything can change for the better, nevermknd what life could be like in 10 years and beyond.

[–]Emit_M10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

I’m a bit socially awkward, not in that I say weird things, I’m a bit quiet, when I do speak I don’t sound awkward though

[–]ZeppKfw12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

Honestly bro, when you see an extrovert that you can talk to. Do it, make friends with him, they'd be more than happy to. Then ask them to hang out and watch how they act and talk. I got rid of my social anxiety and awkwardness this way.

[–]ZZ3xhZz14 points15 points  (5 children) | Copy

When you talk to people, its not about you, its about them, be a reporter and keep asking them questions about themselves (within reason) and make them feel good. Soon they never shutup, and the funny thing is they are doing all the work of the conversation and they think its YOU that is exceptionally social.

heres a TLDR https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKUmXnorrlQ

[–]ZeppKfw10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah the most social people I've ever met were the ones asking questions.

[–]throwlaca9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

Any tips for a 19yr old with no social life or friends at all

​

Secret: Everybody is like that. Those extroverts with 100000 Instagram followers and top of their classes are often the most lonely persons. Unlike women, men thrive as lone wolves. You will be fine. Also, you are here.

[–]selfimprovementman333 points34 points  (2 children) | Copy

Surely just go to a club and make friends with some drunk cunts lmao. If you play a sport go to a practice facility and play a few games with randoms, if you get along well ask for their ig or whatever and maybe yous can jam together the next time you go practice. How I made alot of friends is through basketball, and through already having friends, as they would introduce me to their friends.

[–]shaggyctes8821 points22 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sports + confidence = lots of buddies, eventually friends. That's a hard rule I learnt latter in life

[–]Shieldless_One3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

For guys with no friends it’s usually because they aren’t very social in wich case going to a club not just to socialize but make friends is easier said than done.

[–]Eighth__Man8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Take any opportunity to hang out with people, even if it doesn't sound super fun. Invite people to hang out. If you're socially awkward you are going to look silly but you just have to keep being outgoing. Every day reflect on your social interaction and try to remember how people reacted and think about how you could have acter better or "cooler". This is what I had to do because I'm kind of awkward, you just have to make mistakes and learn from them and eventually you won't be so weird.

[–]A_Wizard171713 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

Accept every invitation and if you have none talk to anyone especially people you think you wouldn't like.

[–]scapeity2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

When I moved to a new area, I got the park district activity book, and signed myself up for co-ed softball and volleyball.

Just needed to start breaking into social circles. It helped a lot.

Even the people outside of my age group helped me network out. It really paid off huge for me.

[–]CarpalCripple1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Pick up Chess and find a local club. With any luck you will meet some smart people, mostly men, across all ages.

My local club meets at a coffee shop. If alcohol is the #1 social lubricant, coffee may well be a close second. And it won't negatively affect your play, unlike the first.

ninjaedit: if you've never played before, www.chess.com and www.lichess.org are both good places to start.

[–]ImOscarMike961 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Search for a hobby, from simple things you admire. By investing time on a hobby you build a life skill and as you evolve you get to know more people with similar interests

[–]AdamantiumLaced0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Move. Find work in a new city. Just clubs or do some activities. You'll get invited out by the group and make new friends. But the only way to force yourself out of your comfort zone is to move.

[–]Cryptoguru77721 points22 points  (0 children) | Copy

Good to see somebody giving words of encouragement. Men need so little to encourage them, yet can mean so much.

​

God bless you sir.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (4 children) | Copy

I got lucky with a few lays when I was younger. Looking back they were "fools checkmates" learning and looking after yourself is really important.

[–]SmokeyFiend585 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

What do you mean by 'a fools checkmate'?

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (1 child) | Copy

Lays where you don't have to do anything to get. Just me being there was enough to get it.

[–]CarpalCripple4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I like bad_person's answer, but in chess, the "Fool's mate" is an actual thing that looks something like this:

f3 e5
g4 Qh4#

Or in visual format, if it suits you better. Point being, it took no effot on his part, the "checkmate" laid itself out for him.

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (12 children) | Copy

Roosh V, recommended in cases of emergency, every 6 months to get an escort. Doing this, you take sex off the pedestal, and you stop feeling sexually frustrated. Eventually, you'll want a quality woman in your life for LTR rather than a low quality woman to put your dick in anyway.

[–]foomasters5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Would you still recommend this to a beginner who has no sexual experience, given a chance the person might get hooked to escorts?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's still better than acting like Elliot Rodger did for the men who have anger issues associated with their sexual frustration.

It costs a lot of money to be addicted to escorts.

[–]DifficultZombie36 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy

You know what, I used to be disgusted by this idea but now I feel it’s ok. My only problem is that it’s illegal and I don’t feel like flying to Netherlands to have paid sex. That would be just desperate.

[–]ReadySetGonads1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Why Netherlands. Vegas baby

[–]785_Exuberant_Bias4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

The Philippines are basically one giant brothel masquerading as a country.

[–]RightHandWolf1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Prostitution is NOT legal in Las Vegas!! Prostitution is legal in the State of Nevada, where it is voted on at the county level, kind of similar to "dry" counties down south, where you can't purchase or consume alcohol. Hays County, Texas is in the Austin Metro area and was a dry county as recently as 20 years ago.

Anyway, back to Nevada. Las Vegas is the county seat of Clark County, and prostitution is illegal in Clark County, so be very, very, very careful about trying to score hookers. You could just drive North to Nye County (the Pahrump area) and visit the Bunny Ranch.

[–]ReadySetGonads1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah thanks for clarifying for those who don't know

[–]throwlaca2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

in cases of emergency, every 6 months to get an escort

Holy shit, I might have incurred in a overdose of this. Lol.

[–]OverEasyFetus1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

It's almost as hard to find a good, quality escort as it is to actually go out and get laid due to government regulations and the game played by these "escort" women or their pimps.

Where are you going that makes it just that easy to find an escort? A good one. I'm not paying a grand for some slaggy pussy or a shitty attitude.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

There were decent ones that were good looking. There's some online sites. It depends on where you live. I just googled "City Name" Escorts and found some results. The number of reviews on an escort are the more decent ones.

You won't likely find anyone that doesn't have any tattoos, but I've found decent HB 8s. Some will suck you without your condom on, but that's usually the limit. If you want to get hotter chicks, you gotta travel to other places like European countries. It gets more expensive, especially the hotter she is.

[–]OverEasyFetus1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah I've been all over Europe so I've been spoiled. Just wondering if you had anything else other than craigslist shit

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Erotic Monkey, Tryst.link, Slixa, and only done Eros once.

[–]generalissimo_jones8 points9 points  (5 children) | Copy

Honestly some of the younger TRPers may just lack necessary physical attributes to make the cut with today's women. I might be one of the older guys here being in my 30's and having first got into red pill thinking and PUA and other stuff over 15 years ago. I feel like i have seen this movement coalesce and i remember back in the early 00's learning about the 80-20 rule when i was in highschool. Since then Tinder and smartphones and social media have happened. I think we have more of a 90-10 or a 95-5 rule these days.

Just keep in mind "the game" is more fierce. The quality of goods on offer in the sexual market place has never been lower. It will be a lot harder for you young guys than it was for men my age. I just went and banged a hooker a few times to get it out of my system when i was young. Emptying your balls clears your head. Especially when your hormones are screaming at you in your teenage years. The pressure with a hooker is a lot lower and honestly some women get funny about virgins.

By all means keep going for your own sakes. There is so much more to life than women.

[–]420KUSHBUSH4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

"Since then Tinder and smartphones and social media have happened. I think we have more of a 90-10 or a 95-5 rule these days."

I was about to add in my own point and reply although I kept reading and spotted you stating "The quality of goods on offer in the sexual market place has never been lower."

Agreed, though the getting a hooker part is where we have our differences

[–]generalissimo_jones2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Basically my point was we're well into the law of diminishing returns at this point. I almost struggle to believe just how dire options for young men are now compared to 15-20 years ago when i was their age.

Speak for yourself dude. Best £150 i ever spent.

[–]trialithic 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

Are you saying that even though the game has gotten significantly harder (I tend to agree), the quality of women also substantially lower than it was 30 years ago?

[–]generalissimo_jones0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

When i was still wasting my time in the game pursuing women an awful lot of them were disgustingly obese, covered in tattoos, had fluorescent coloured hair. Were basically disgusting. Had NOTHING even remotely interesting or original to say for themselves. Probably had n-counts in the 100 range and a high incidence of cluster b personality disorders. Even in the 15-20 years i have been active in the sexual market place i have noticed a sharp decline.

[–]enterim13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

He is right. I would also add that sex is overrated in your head as long as you are virgin. It will not change your life.

I was sexless until I was 21 as well. I think my first kiss was at 21 as well. But once I got my first time out of the way it was like something switched and I hadn't had any problems having sex since then. Just keep working. It will take some time, but once you see results, your sex life will change without the need of you focussing on it.

[–]Math_36 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I needed to read this, thank you.

[–]ugluk16 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

The most important thing is to refuse to become a beta orbiter. Move on, ignore the cunt.

[–]420KUSHBUSH4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Realized this myself a few weeks ago. Truly well said

[–]L3onard36 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

...started looking at the world through red lenses...

The blue pill is the lense...TRP is unfiltered truth.

Nice post.

[–]Roto2esdios8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you are so anxious about sex go to a sex worker. Sex is not THAT great. What it's great is being economic independent. Doing shit you like without money stoping you from doing it.

Sex is so so low in pleasure compared to other great things that last in time you would start to see women like little things with little to offer to you.

And remember, sex is not what defines your worth in this life.

[–]Shadows14553 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

You're 100% right, I'm kinda like the 19 yo you but I will give it time

[–]UpperRedSide[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hey I’m still 19 and I’m doing ok now.

[–]CyberXydra113 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

Okay, but is it okay to lose virginity to the prostitute, and see that sex isn't that bih thing, and it shouldn't be your main goal?

[–]usegao10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

When I studied abroad in Japan, I went from losing my virginity to a prostitute to being paid for an English tutorial session that consisted mostly of sex by the end of the year. Being a virgin really fucked with my head and having even that taboo sexual experience made me feel way more comfortable with myself.

Whether its "okay" or not is really up to you, but I have no regrets. Definitely don't tell people about it if you do; treat it like any other jerk-off session. I don't even count that experience as when I lost my virginity now. It was just a training exercise as far as I'm concerned.

[–]PolishSlav6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

id like to here a response to that question as well actually

[–]Foozerd2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Prostitutes aren’t worth the money bro. Better to spend the time improving yourself. If you’ve never tried it before might be worth a shot just to say you did it. At least you’ll know :)

[–]Laykeside0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

This is slightly hard to answer.

I think it's ultimately your call but I can lay down the pros and the con's for you.

Pros:

1)You've finally had sex.

2)You can assess if it meant a lot to you or not.

Cons:

1)Condom-sex, so you won't get to feel the warmth and wetness of a raw pussy(Which is largely the allure of sex, condom sex pales in comparison to wrapped up sex, basic risk reward).

2)Although some hooker's may take a hefty tip so that you could raw dog her, I wouldn't recommend raw dogging a hooker, and for heaven's sake, don't go down on a hooker.

3)You probably won't last long since this is your first time, so you might not get your money's worth, and hooker's are usually anal about how many times they fuck. YMMV. some will agree only for a single sex session during the hour she's paid for, some two and so forth. In case she is only open to fucking once and you blow your load in 2 mins, you've paid a hooker for 1hr of company and 2 mins of sex.

4)They're professional, so you can't hammer away at her like you could a regular gal. AKA no heavy hair pulling, no spitting, hard chokes etc.

[–]jihocech0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What about MILFs? Some older women like to teach unexperienced guys.

[–]AllThatJack4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

When you’ve realized the journey your on is about a quality life you’ve arrived. The rest will fall in place.

[–]Nighthawkdragon82 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’d say read less go out more. Approach more women.

[–]throwlaca3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

This is something you have to drill into your head. Look at the SMV curve. Its lowest when you are young and highest when you are 40-45. Yes, at 50 its still high. I was a virgin nerd and my RP father would tell me that "Wait until you are 30, girls will start flooding". He was right. Now I'm 40, I barely lift and I can pick up girls almost effortlessly.

Just wait. Give it time.

[–]oajgaowj321khdnkanw0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Dont wait to bang some old banged up hag go for prime pussy now even fucking up is just good practice

[–]throwlaca0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I never said I pick up old girls. 20 year old girls go for 50+ guys all the time. They don't do it in public, tough.

[–]oajgaowj321khdnkanw0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

True but still stupid to wait 20 years to do something you could start practicing now

[–]1NathanHollister3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You gotta convince yourself not to care too much really. Going out and hitting on 20 girls a day is tiring and often doesn't work. Just talk to the girls you naturally meet in the course of your day and you'll be good.

I.e. don't be outcome dependent. Go to the bar to have a good time, not to get laid. If you happen to meet a hot girl there, go for it. But If you go to get laid you probably won't and it will cause mental stress which reduces your success.

[–]pseudon_ 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy

Give it time? No. Be actively trying instead of hoping something will come to you

[–]UpperRedSide[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You weren’t paying attention.

I was proactively meeting new people, gaming new girls, and getting around. Everything doesn’t instantly fall into place. When I advise to be patient I’m advising to be patient with the efforts, when it seems they aren’t producing anything. They haven’t yet, but they will soon. I don’t want people beating themselves up because they’ve been trying and haven’t had luck yet.

[–]usegao3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is true. It is definitely important not to skip the networking/seduction part. You can't just lift and read your way into a better social or romantic life.

[–]Bry--Guy2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you brother. I really needed advice like this recently.

[–]Reenas542 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think i was like 20 and virgin when discovered menosphere. I think first phase was mgtow and i was like: fuck yeah, i don't need them. Later i was interested into pua and how to seduce women. Then was redpill phase where i was interested in building value. Now i'd say i'm somewhere in the middle of redpill and mgtow. Lost my virginity at 23 and then it happened... When it rains it pours. Once you break that point there becomes no secret how to play and communicate with women. Now i'm in mid 20's, have some fwb's/fuck buddies, but in the end when we are done with sex i want them to gtfo. Yeah, pussy is enjoyable, but not so that it would be worth my peace and quiet. Every vagina is same and rarely worth the time spent on it. Do lifting, do reading, do whatever do you want, but do it all for yourself. If you do that purely only for vagina you will be really disapointed.

[–]Sad_Sleeper2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Was a virgin until 26, managed to get in a relationship with an older Girl, 28 at the time. Found out that i had problem with my dick(short frenulum), after the surgery we didn't have sex. I was a bluepilled beta and got too obsessed about her. 6 months later she dumped me and went for her best male friend. She is now 30 and hit the wall hard(smoking, lack of sleep inparopriate loose of weight with fatburner and big cloric deficit). This was my revelation and i went into an anger phase. And i dogged a massive bullet.

I have went through some shit, lost my job because i was too distracted with all the drama that this "woman" made. Decided to take a break from work and didn't work for 2.5 months. Focused on myself, working out, meditating, learning new things, skiing during the week. Landed my current job in february and doing great.

​

After the breakup started reading more about TRP, was visiting the seduction reddit alot. Switched to Redpill. In November managed to kiss a girl a few hours after we've met, i could've f-closed but she was having alot of issues and didn't happen. Fucked her in february after seeing eachother in a Bar. I was completly sober, she was drunk.

Fucked her a few times, but she wanted serious stuff, so things didn't work out.

Continued improving and i managed to loose 6kgs. Signed in for boxing classes, also i've been doing Folk dance classes since September.Somehow i've grown up and everyone is saying that i am more mature now.One of my best friends is Redpill but not redpill aware and he is helping me alot, he sees that i got the potential, so he gives me advices on everything, also he is helping me change my wardrobe.This has been crucual, because having someone give you guidance in life is a really good thing, it helps you grow alot.

Stared noticing the glances of the girls when i pass by. All the shit and how the world works. I got the nerdy look Glasses and full beard, but i am well groomed and well dressed.

I know this is just the beginning and better things will happen later on.

​

There is one really good quote from a Don Diablo song:If you work hard and believe, the universe will always help you, to catch your dreams!

​

Keep grinding. keep lifting and doing what you love. Everything else will come into place sooner or later.

[–]420KUSHBUSH1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Something less stated overall is that women now that grew up in the social media age are much more lacking in social skills and as awkward as any other guy

With that being said though their standards are higher now than ever before. Truth does not make the world go round, perception does

[–]gyagu1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

What if you dropped out, live with your mom, and are mentally ill despite otherwise having a lot of value but no self confidence

[–]UpperRedSide[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Get a local full time job that you can walk to and work your fucking ass off. Get your finances in order.

Then move on to your health. Get gym membership, start eating right, cut down on drinking/smoking/ingesting harmful shit.

Then move on to your social life. Make friends.

Read books, learn hobbies.

Girls will follow. It’s so fucking simple.

Four months ago I was jobless, carless, friendless, and kissless, living in a room in my dad’s house and not allowed out.

Four months later I have a job, a car, an apartment, a fit physique, a massive social circle, and four girls that I’m fucking regularly. Stop whining and put in the work. That’s all there is to it.

[–]gyagu1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Doing all that except the job. Not even mentally stable enough, no real work history, theyre mostly just a waste of life and im spoiled enough to have savings to go off of. Your story is encouraging. I guess i just need to go perform all these sad acoustic ballads ive been writing in my room for years. I think im a misanthrope. I play multiple instruments and sports, workout regularly, and started drawing this year because im too stupid to read except on enough Adderall. I just cant stand the social market value game and how unfair life is even if in many ways its been in my favour. Unconditional love just isnt a thing from really anyone. Every friend ive ever had has just been willing to throw me under the bus to get ahead and im scared to admit to myself i have too. People my age will stop talking to you immediately if thats what they see other people are doing. Just walking around san francisco and seeing human beings in conditions worse than i had ever seen really disturbed me. I almost look forward to death as sealing shut any possibility of that happening to me. I ruminate constantly to the point of suicidal ideation unless i take drugs and eat the side effects. I think the root of my ruined life is my narcissistic dad who im only just now beginning to make understand what hes done to me. Its really all the lost potential. I could definitely have been a d1 tennis scholarship chad and then become something but maybe its the hardships ive faced that have made me the artist i am now. But plenty of people face hardships and dont turn it into anything positive it just sucks. I dont even know i just want to spend all my savings and buy a shotgun and end it tbh unless im tame impala by the end of the year

[–]randomTATRP0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

lol i didnt read this whole text BUT

you got me on 'im too stupid to read except on enough Adderall'

  1. fuck off with that loser mentality
  2. fuck off from fucking drugs

'I dont even know i just want to spend all my savings and buy a shotgun and end it tbh unless im tame impala by the end of the year'

are you retarded? the title says give it time, yet you want to be famous as fuck in 6 mths, give me a fucking break. work your ass off by working on your music and maybe in few years if you are talented/got lucky/whatever, you MAY be the next tame impala man. just dont be a pussy. i've wanted to end it all too for a few times but dont be a fucking pussy and gulp it up and do shit. live the life, however bad it may be. it's better than being dead.

edit: stupid reddit formatting

[–]gyagu0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You're completely right man except I think the drugs help a lot if you use them responsibly. I appreciate you writing me

[–]randomTATRP0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

drugs fuck your psyche. DO NOT. FUCKING. DO. THEM. i've been there, i know what i'm talking about. trust me. just go cold turkey, dont be a little bitch and soon enough you'll feel a lot better.

[–]UngovernableYxB1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks man. I needed this. My journey is just really beginning now. I'm not really too concerned with losing my vcard asap. I wanna lose it when its meaningful, some random fuck and chuck.

[–]noobish_senpai0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I found this subreddit today and I feel a slight shift in my mindset. I'll make sure to read everything in the sidebar and to implement as many advices and information into my life. I won't lie, I've and still am (for the moment) a fucking blue pill. Upon reading the posts I am starting to feel more and more enraged. Not with the world or society, but with my very self. Ive already found very useful information and I will make sure to become my best self.

With regards

[–]Jesusfeminist-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I disagree, you aren’t getting laid because you aren’t putting enough effort into getting laid. Getting better at all this other shit isn’t gonna make girls fall right on your dick. YOU NEED TO GO OUT AND HUNT FOR PUSSY

[–][deleted] -11 points-10 points  (7 children) | Copy

No you’re tripping dude, this is some feel good bullshit

I lost my virginity at 12 to a 15 year old girl before TRP even existed

Nineteen is too long to wait to get laid

You need to fuck some bitches, not “give it time.” Times already up dude, get it in!

[–]UpperRedSide[S] 12 points13 points  (6 children) | Copy

This is precisely the attitude that fucks so many young guys up.

The feeling that they’re running out of time and they’re losing their window. It’s bullshit.

The goal of the Red Pill is not to “get it in.” It is to create a great life for yourself and have women as a happy little addition to it.

I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 19 because I was raised by religious extremists who didn’t even let me read books that were not the Bible, let alone go to school or play with peers. God forbid I go outside and be corrupted. Try spending your entire life inside your house, and half of that in your room. No internet, no pop culture, no social skills. Plenty of anxiety, social retardation, and low self esteem though.

Imagine the amount of catching up I had to do. Then realize it only took me four months to get laid. I’m impressed with myself and you should be too.

[–]Vikingcel-8 points-7 points  (5 children) | Copy

The goal of the Red Pill is not to “get it in.” It is to create a great life for yourself and have women as a happy little addition to it.

No. TRP is specifically about 'getting it in'.

[–]UpperRedSide[S] 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Yes of course. You very literally know nothing about trp.

[–]Vikingcel-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

Discussion of sexual strategy in a culture increasingly lacking a positive identity for men.

Have you literally read the literal sidebar?

Besides that, just because you're waiting patiently and working on yourself to get it in doesn't mean you don't want to, well, get it in. That's what it's about and that's why you're here.

[–]UpperRedSide 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy

I think you’ve missed the fact that the important of that sentence is “positive identity for men,” not “sexual strategy.”

If you think the point of the red pill is sex you’re too dumb to reason with. Now this conversation is going nowhere so please stop making me repeat myself. It’s annoying.

[–]Vikingcel 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy

Speaking of dumb, I'm very curious how can you decide which part of that sentence is more important, besides that it fits your own narrative.

Yes, this conversation is over. Debating someone with the reasoning akin to that of an American presstitute is below me.

[–]modSlyGradient[M] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Alright, cut it out with the slap-fighting, you too /u/UpperRedSide

[–]Xchromqueen-1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy

But why does this even have to be discuss? Why do men care about sex so much that we get people like incels? Like don’t you want to keep your virginity for your wife or something?

I honestly don’t get the big deal. Sex is sex. Nothing special about it

[–]UpperRedSide[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

When you’ve never had sex, as a young man, it’s literally the most important thing to you. Once they’ve had sex, it a lot less important

[–]Xchromqueen0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I think this comes from society enforcing the stereotype that men are supposed to be over sexual with women and if they can’t get sex with women then they are a loser. Men need to realize that their value isn’t tied to weather they’ve been inside a vagina. A frivolous thing such as sex should not be enough to make a young man depressed that means there is something seriously wrong with society.

This issue mirrors how society works to protect a woman’s virginity (by using common names like “whore” “cock carousel” “slut” and also critiquing clothing choices etc) and ties her value to her virginity.

It’s fucked up on both ends. If society didn’t hold such polarizing sexual expectations for women and men the world would be a better place.

[–]UpperRedSide[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

The thing that has guys depressed is not the fact that they can’t get their rocks off. Because they can. A guy can jerk off any day he wants.

The thing that has a lot of other guys fucked up is the lack of validation. Sex means that a woman found a man desirable. If a guy can’t get sex, he starts to feel as if no one wants him. That’s the painful part. You have to see it from a guy’s perspective. We need reassurance. We need to feel like we’re good enough, and if we feel like we’re not good enough to be wanted by a woman, it eats at us.

[–]Xchromqueen0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Oh well I understand that from that point of view. I guess I never really thought of straight men wanting to be desired. Thanks for opening my eyes to that



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