Summary- I went on a spontaneous date with a 28, fit HB6 from bumble. I was giving her tingles and escalating while holding frame, just to throw it all away in 1 minute by losing frame.

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Starting out wrong-

I matched with this chick a little over a month ago on bumble. We sent a few messages back and forth but I didn't ask for a date because I was booked for the next few days and would be leaving town for 2 weeks. 230pm, yesterday she messages me out of nowhere with the plain old "how are you?" Within a couple messages she told me she was just chilling at home so I jumped on the opening, "Let's meet up for a drink then". A few messages about logistics and we had plans to meet in an hour at a hip, quiet little bar.

I had been reading TRP guides and posts for a couple hours before she sent me the first message. My brain was in information consumption mode and I didn't realize it. As someone who has had to really make an effort to be more social and outgoing, this is poison for my opening game. I got there just before her and when she sat down next to me all I could say was "hi". I didn't realize until that moment that I had not prepped myself mentally to be around people. I froze in a way that hasn't happened to me since I first started having success gaming. She immediately felt uncomfortable and I started to fidget with my sunglasses that were on the bar. My awkwardness and visual discomfort just made it worse. What the fuck was happening to me? Where is the witty opening that usually rolls out of my mouth?

Thankfully after about 5-10 seconds of this discomfort she opened the conversation. I immediately quieted the noise in my head ripping apart my own frame. Now that the ice was broken I was good. We talked about some pretty bland stuff, like beer (she works at a brewery and we were drinking craft beer), cool bars in town (Im fairly new to the city), and other boring stuff. I could tell she was at least physically attracted to me, but I wasn't doing anything to stimulate her emotions. At least I was building some rapport. It was certainly not my best first impression, but her physical attraction to me gave me some wiggle room.

As we were both finishing our first beer and the bartender came to us, I just asked for a check. The girl had a slightly concerned look on her face. I waited a few seconds to let her wonder if this was the end, then asked "are you down for another? Let's check out that place around the corner that you were just telling me about." This made her smile.

When the check came, it was both drinks, on one check. I hesitated a moment, then said fuck it and just handed my card to the bartender. She shuffled through her small purse for something and I said "7 bucks will cover it" She looked at me like dafuq? and handed me some money. This definitely could have been done in a less spergy way.

Building attraction/feelz

As we were walking to the next place the conversation was getting better. My game was starting to wake up a little bit. At the next venue I was on point. I was giving her false disqualifications, negging, etc. I started with a little kino, just touching her shoulder for a second when saying something,etc. I started seeing that shift in her immediately once my game came out of hiding. Feelz were being achieved. One of the best ones was when she was showing me pictures on her phone of her dog and pictures of her at a wedding. I just said "Jeez you aren't very photgenic. You're way sexier in person", "whhhaaaatt?! Everyone always tells me I'm so photogenic though!", "Yeah, I mean you have the smile and poses locked down, it's just the awkward looking chick in the pictures doesn't match the sexpot sitting in front of me"

As we finished our drinks I asked for another check. I just paid for this one. Then I grabbed her hand and led her outside. We walk around the city for 20 minutes or so while I keep upping the kino a little by grabbing her hand or putting my hand on the small of her back, and then taking it away and acting uninterested. I keep a CF frame and get her giggling quite a bit. A couple time when I would throw a false disqualification her way there would be an exchange where she would say something like "If you aren't into blondes then why are you on a date with me?" "I don't know, we should probably just end it" Then she would say "ok bye" and I would say the same back. Then she would stop, then quickly just catch up with me.

I tell her let's get 1 final drink. Instead of asking where we were going, she asks if I want to go to x bar. I oblige her. There was more basic game stuff at the bar. Some kino, CF, setting a dominant frame. Nothing worth note though.

Escalating, logistics and losing frame

When we got done there I said, let's just go for a walk. I was about a mile from my car and said we would just walk in that general direction so that I wasn't too far from it. I found out that she walked to the date. Perfect, I can offer a ride home then ask to meet her dog that she talked so much about once I get there. Not long after we started walking, while continuing to slowly escalate the kino, we stopped at a little park area and sat on a bench. I put my hand on the side of her head and brought her in for a kiss. Just a few easy slow kisses, then immediately went back into talking like nothing happened. She is now touching me pretty much non-stop and I go for another kiss, this time grabbing the hair on the back of her head and giving her a good tongue fucking. We make out for a bit then I pull her off the bench and we start walking.

As we kept walking we would stop every couple minutes to look at something, then just start making out. I was squeezing her ass and picked her up and spun her around, just escalating and giving her feelz. The more we made out the more she was poking at my dominant frame with things she would say, but I held strong. We were almost to my car and I was just about to ask her if I could give her a ride when she said "can we go in there and get ooooonne more drink?" It was a chill upscale place with couches and good places to lounge. "sure, let's do it" As we were almost at the door she started to say something "why don't we just go.... oh nevermind"

I am fairly certain she was about to tell me to come to her place, but didn't finish. When we sat down I went to use the bathroom. When I got back and sat down she was looking at the cocktail menu and said "I don't think I'm going to drink anything" "Really? Well let's leave then" "No, you can have a drink I'll just have water" "Nah fuck that" And I grabbed her hand and took her outside. Boom, her demeanor changed completely. With a smile on my face I said "I can't believe you brought me in there just to NOT have a drink, I don't know if I still like you" Then she said "Ok then, bye" and slowly started to turn around. Me- "Ok bye!" and I turned around and started walking to my car, thinking she would just walk towards me and submit to the frame I thought I still had (which I didn't).

Next thing I know I'm at my car. I get in and drive up the road we were just on to see If I can see her, nothing. I pull out my phone and send a message "where did you go?" "I'm home, you left me" In a stupid, thirsty, last ditch effort I said "let me come meet your dog" "not today love" and that was the last communication we have had. The date started at 330pm, and by 7pm I went from minor physical attraction to feelz and a wet pussy, then all the way back round to nothing. Luckily on of my plates sent me a pussy pic and a message saying "I need you, tonight" while I was on my date, so at least I didn't have to dwell on my failure immediately after.

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Lessons Learned/Ways I Fucked Up-

  • I need to prepare before a date by getting myself in a social mood, or at least go over some good ice breakers and feelz inducing conversation threads beforehand. As far as I have come in game, there is still a spergy antisocial loner that will come out if I don't actively keep him at bay.
  • Tingles can go away in an instant. Not so much by being awkward, or saying something stupid, but by losing frame. I have made so many mistakes with women but they don't affect shit if you have a solid frame.
  • I need to resist the urge to go for the last ditch effort fuck salvage. If I exercised patience after my fuck up I could have given the hamster room to run on it's wheel. Instead I showed thirst by sending a message essentially saying "I value your pussy so much can I have" giving her validation and sticking a fork in any bit of my frame that was still intact.
  • Lead the interaction and don't stop. I had been leading the whole date and she loved it. Even when she chose the 3rd bar for us to go to, I was leading, she just chose where we would go. It was my idea to go to another bar, i just let her contribute. With the final place, the activity was her idea. When I let her lead the date, she decided that she didn't really want what she thought she did. Then I made it worse by worrying about her. She didn't want to drink and I instantly went into supplicating beta mode by leaving the venue signalling a "let me please you" frame that was in-congruent to the frame I had built for us. This crumbled my dominant leading frame which instantly turned her off.
  • Things like placing blame and accusations as I did before we parted ways can be strong game tools, but they can also backfire if you don't use them at the right time. It should be a way to break rapport when escalating and inducing tingles, not as a way to try to recover frame. It was the icing on the cake on a short string of missteps.