No social life/skills. Where do I start?

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August 2, 2019
86 upvotes

I'm 21, I've been lurking on TheRedPill subreddits for some years and it really opened my eyes.

My mother kept me in her bubble early in my adolescence (until I turned 16) and I became so shy and unconfident.

I would spend my days on my computer playing videogames, masturbating to porn and sometimes researching about why I felt so shy/lonely/tired/lifeless.

The only thing that helped me feeling slightly better was lifting weights. I've been going to the gym since I was 14.

Now I'm 21, I go to Uni in another city and I'm more independent. (not financially) I recently started having success in kicking what looked like a heavy porn addiction. I still feel like shit and it will take time to get back to normal.

I'm still that guy though. Shy, little to no friends, quiet in social situations, lifeless, no ambition/drive. I spend most of my time on screens and it's very difficult for me to change that.

I don't know how to make friends. When I'm around others I just don't have anything to say. I don't go out often and when I do, I just can't have fun. I've never been able to make friends or fit in a group.

Where do I start?


Post Information
Title No social life/skills. Where do I start?
Author imnadd
Upvotes 86
Comments 49
Date 02 August 2019 10:27 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/249585
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/cl2bmu/no_social_lifeskills_where_do_i_start/
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Comments

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon60 points61 points  (1 child) | Copy

My mother kept me in her bubble early in my adolescence (until I turned 16) and I became so shy and unconfident.

Yes, but you're a man now. This means accepting your own life and taking responsibility for yourself.

What happened happened, but now it's down to you to fix it. No more blaming others.

I would spend my days on my computer playing videogames, masturbating to porn and sometimes researching about why I felt so shy/lonely/tired/lifeless.

This is because you're not actually doing anything.

You think it works like this:

shy => therefore doing nothing.

What's really happening is:

doing nothing => therefore shy.

Start doing things. Good work on the gym, now get out there and do other things. Activities, social things, group things. Find something you like and do it. If you can't find something you want to do, literally do anything. There's a million groups you can join that are based around an activity. Go do some of them.

'm still that guy though. Shy, little to no friends, quiet in social situations, lifeless, no ambition/drive. I spend most of my time on screens and it's very difficult for me to change that.

DO MORE THINGS

I don't know how to make friends. When I'm around others I just don't have anything to say. I don't go out often and when I do, I just can't have fun. I've never been able to make friends or fit in a group.

DO MORE THINGS.

It's not about being less shy or being less scared or being more motivated or watching less porn.

It's about doing things. By doing things, even something as dumb as joining a tightrope firestick juggling you will be on the path you should be on.

You'll suck, you'll make enemies, you'll make friends, you'll burn yourself and you'll fall (literally if the firestick tightrope thing). And you'll grow and you'll be in a position where your problems start to fix themselves.

Your basic problem is that life is so easy that you can do nothing. If you had to kill a lion to eat tonight, you'd have a much more interesting life.

You have to do that for yourself though, because you can eat and you're safe and warm. So go out there and do something.

[–]owtaa 1 points [recovered]  (9 children) | Copy

First tead the How to Get Laid Like a Warlord thread.

The basic concepts of that and other threads:

  1. You are enough and that's enough. Don't go in with some shitty fake alpha frame. Your frame is, "I'm a man, that's enough for women to sleep with me if I don't fuck it up". Don't worry too much about your shitty upbringing and never qualify yourself to men or women. If you're awkward, notice it, fix it, and move on.

  2. Shit tests are good and women aren't looking for perfect. If people shit test you, men or women, it's qualification. Read his thread for advice on passing shit tests. Enjoy the tension of getting tested and then fucking hot girls once your frame is strong enough. No one will fault you for failing a couple. Never qualify yourself if you fail. Just notice, fix, move on.

  3. Focus on exercise, academics, and getting a job. Not only is this way more important for your life than becoming a super pussy slayer, it will help you get laid. You'll meet a guy in college who already has it figured out and you'll know immediately. He's a nice dude, always works out, never ever talks about his sex life, runs a bunch of student organizations, and occasionally you'll catch women leaving his room, probably once or twice a month.

[–]Aymane2218 points9 points  (8 children) | Copy

Got shit tested by men yesterday. They were both smaller than me. What’s the reason men shit test?

[–]owtaa 1 points [recovered]  (4 children) | Copy

Evolutionarily, same reason as women. Because, they want to make sure you won't shit the bed when there's real pressure. It's even more important to have solid friends than it is to have a a hot girl. That's why shooting the shit is fun, your "body agenda", even outside of sex, is to test and be tested.

[–]Aymane2215 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

Got you so if men fuck with you fuck with them back and don’t take it personal. Or can you agree and amplify it?

[–]owtaa 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy

With women I say ignore or A&M. For men, yeah, fuck back a bit or A&M.

If a guy is trying to humiliate you in front of a girl or goes too far with the shit testing, just ignore.

[–]Aymane2212 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I feel like I hear so many men failing shit tests from other men yet they all hang out?

[–]Project_Zero_Betas0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Crabs in a bucket. AM don't shittest.

[–]Aymane2210 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I guess there’s a difference between fucking with you and shit testing. Hard to tell the difference though

[–]Project_Zero_Betas0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

There is. I'd say it comes down to the type of relationship you have with the other guy.

[–]hiem3w37 points38 points  (1 child) | Copy

Stop watching porn

For me, it was easier to make friends when I was doing things and going out because I had things to talk about in a conversation.

Try new foods, routes to work, books, shows, video games, places to eat, events at your uni, clubs you can join, classes to take, go to an arcade, or rock climbing, or an art gallery, check out local music, learn how to cook, just do new things.

The easier places for me to make friends was at work and in uni. Sit in new spots in class, try and have a conversation to hang out sometime.

And accept that you’re gonna fuck up. Not everyone’s going to like you or want to hang out. You’re probably not going to be 100% off porn when you want to. These are all gradual changes.

[–]MakoShark930 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Best advice I've seen.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed88 points89 points  (2 children) | Copy

You're made being a boring fuck into your identity.

Damn. You're 21. A child. You've done nothing with your life, so of course nothing appeals to you.

You don't know what you like because you've never tried anything.

Go explore the world. Try some hobbies. Do something weird. Eat jellyfish at a Dim Sum place. Jump out of a perfectly good airplane. Fly a kite in a park. Join a coed volleyball league. Find your local Fight Club. Go to a club and hit on the freakiest girl there. Rent a Lambo for a day. Get a part time job as a bouncer. Go hiking with a meetup group.

There's an entire world out there and you're hermitcrabbing it.

That's pathetic.

Definition of insanity. Pull the pin on your life. Why you waiting?

[–]uptimex9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

Definition of insanity

Doing the same thing every time and expecting every time it will give a different result?

[–]KingRead9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

As defined by Einstein yes

[–]Elnarior11 points12 points  (4 children) | Copy

I’m 22 and i’ve been in your situation(Been gaming,less friends,porn addict etc etc)so i’m going to give you some advices

You see you can’t change anything instantly in life,you’ve got to work it hard til you make it.

1)Cut porn,don’t instantly stop fapping just try to do less and less with time.From once a day try doing it twice a week and then once a week

2)Try to socialize with people,if you socialize enough you’ll socialize even more.How?Well even the stupidest approaches work

for example:

You’re working out and a guy is weightlifting with bad form,you could approach him and inform him about his stance or way he’s working out and there you can start a conversation or even become friends.Simple and effective

You can even socialize just by saying hi to someone(if you know how to lead the conversation)

i for an example became friends with a guy just by approaching him and giving my hand at the uni and saying “my name’s philip”.Since then we’ve become great friends

3)don’t give a fuck.Maintain your frame and never give a simple fuck in anything,with that mindset nothing can break you

4)have a hobby.TRP really hates videogames and call it beta shit,to be frank if you can cut too much videogames and accompany it with other hobbies like reading books,studying astronomy etc etc you’re good to go

5)People love hearing your passion about your hobby(especially woman).If your hobby is all about something interesting like astronomy or history people would love to hear about them(people love useful and interesting information)

6)Improvise adapt overcome.Life is all about challenges so try to overcome those challenges.I personally self challenge myself for example previous year on January i challenged myself to do cold showers everyday for the rest of the year,which i personally did it and it felt good big physically and mentally and since then i’ve been doing cold showers even in the cold winters.

7)Be good looking:

Yeah be good looking,maintain frame,smile a lot(not forced),laugh a lot and enjoy other peoples company.Life is too short to start contemplating life choices and depression and shit.

plus:The things the top commentators said.

Hope i’ve helped you even a little bit

[–]187oddfuture2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

This is a solid comment. I had a very similar situation to OP and would game between 8-12 hours a day daily from age 12 to when I graduated college at 22. Literally wasted away in front of a screen for my entire childhood. Decided to severely cut down games to no more than 2 hours a day, and decided to use that time to read and grow. Now I read a bunch of books to learn, take notes on RP posts, lift, and am addicted to self improvement. Recognize that the time you spent gaming 12 hours a Day was a waste of time, but rather than lament on that, use that feeling to drive you to succeed. Some guys don’t figure this out until their 30s.

[–]Elnarior0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

well said!!

[–]Blazer8080 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Also don't fall for sunk cost fallacy where you feel like not playing games is a waste of money.

[–]187oddfuture0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I see it as paying to learn a lesson. I dumped a shit ton of money into games. I have games sitting in my steam account I’ll never play and others I’ll never finish. But I’d rather pay now to learn what will help me grow 10x as much down the line.

[–]comu_nacho6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

Learn to dance. Lock yourself in your room and follow youtube tutorials, 20 min a day, a few months. You'll become more close with your body. A lot of people live in their heads, and become neurotic.

Join a sports club/dojo. You'll find people with some shared interest, and by pure exposure you'll find at least acquaintances, at best a friend. Go to the gym to bulk up if you can, but I think socialization is more important now.

[–]cdh10036 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dance classes are massively under-rated, probably as they’re seen as a bit effeminate by many guys. But I went to dance classes for several years (mixed stuff: jive, salsa, ballroom), and learned two important things: first, dance classes are 90% women, and they really want to dance with men (else they have to take turns in the men’s role); second, women love it when a guy can salsa or tango properly...

[–]TheFastCat2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Make something. Create something - whether it's with your hands, written, coded, art, photography, a Facebook Group, a garden, a new recipe that interests you. Make something.

After that, make something else.

Join a couple of random meetups. You will meet dozens of other people like you battling ennui. That will help normalize the process of self-actualization in your mind.

create routines that help you grow. The gym is good - now up the regularity and intensity to spur additional growth. Get your diet in line as a multiplier. Start learning or practicing a second language on duo lingo. It makes it easy to do that every day for ten minutes. effortless growth.

Figure out a way to make some additional money. Even if you already have a job. Look for gigs on Craigslist or facebook for half day jobs that pay cash. It will move you out of your comfort zone and give you real life experience points.

Read a non-fiction book that appeals to you. Explore goodreads.com until something grabs your attention. Find it in your local library so that you don't have to buy it.

these are just a couple of thoughts I could write pages. The crux of your situation is that you are in a stagnant rutt. The good news is that your inner psyche recognizes it and is screaming for a change, and also action. This is a tremendous blessing, especially at age 21. Focus on that cry and feed it until it decides what it is hungry for -- companionship? challenge? belonging? exploration? acceptance? transition?. Your job right now is to introduce it to as many flavors as possible to help it figure that out.

[–]the13thmonk3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Similar younger years. Similar background.

"I don't know how to make friends. When I'm around others I just don't have anything to say. I don't go out often and when I do, I just can't have fun. I've never been able to make friends or fit in a group."

First don't define having fun by being with others. Be able to have fun on your own. You may not always be able to. But for now with no social skills it's what your stuck with until you can learn to interact.

Which leads to -> start learning how to socially interact. This is going to take some time. Maybe a few years. But go study people who are socially adept. Practice mimicking. Then practice your skills. I made it a habit during college to talk to at least one new person a day. Maybe someone in the elevator or a lunch hall etc. Some were okay talking. Some said 2-3 words. But you learn a lot.

There are other strategies to do this, and as always FerreallyRed is spitting some good advice

"Go explore the world. Try some hobbies. Do something weird. Eat jellyfish at a Dim Sum place. Jump out of a perfectly good airplane. Fly a kite in a park. Join a coed volleyball league. Find your local Fight Club. Go to a club and hit on the freakiest girl there. Rent a Lambo for a day. Get a part time job as a bouncer. Go hiking with a meetup group."

It's going to take some time to change. Don't be hard on yourself. Embrace it. Understand that you're working for a better tomorrow. Keep pushing

[–]187oddfuture2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Same situation from me too. Significantly improved my social skills by joining a fraternity and making sure I was rooming with one of the chads the following year. Mimicked him and observed him everyday until I saw what worked and internalized it. Helped a ton.

[–]Immuchtooawesome2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Meetup.com and social clubs on campus.

Read philosophy to develop your own weltanschauung to find others with similar views. This is the easiest way to make friends.

[–]frankgold2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

TRP sidebar.

Also, get a life. Learn a new language. Pick up a musical instrument and learn how to play it. Practice singing or dancing. Study humor and jokes. Learn to code. Get fit and strong. Eat healthy. Start an online business. Maybe as simple as a free blog or youtube channel.

Just be passionate about something. Or maybe a handful of things. And then socialize around that. You go to the gym? Cool. See who regularly lifts weights when you are at the gym, be gym buddies with that guy. Learn a language? See if you can find local meetups and language exchanges. Practice playing guitar? See other people playing guitar. Practice humor? See local standup comedy clubs who give anyone free 2-minutes on the stage.

[–]McVaghunter7 points8 points  (6 children) | Copy

21yo shy and unconfident
been going to the gym since I was 14

no fucking way a man who spent all these years lifting is still unconfident

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (1 child) | Copy

Gym can make you feel better about your looks. I have a nice lean physique, girls give me attention for it, but it did nothing for my self esteem.

It only gives me temporary boosts of satisfaction.

[–]HitTheWall884 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Realize you are enough. Work on improving yourself, and all of the other stuff will fall into place. Go to concerts, listen to music you wouldn't normally listen to, drink new drinks, learn what kind of wine you like, what kind of whiskey, do drugs(moderation), read a new book every week, stop porn, join a club, get a new hobby. Doing these things will make you more interesting. You'll have lots of things to talk about because you'll be doing more things. You'll make friends or acquaintances this way, just by being there. Find a bar you like and just go hang out there regularly. Talk to the bartender and other bar patrons. This is a marathon, not a sprint. It will take time.

The drugs part is something I wasn't sure of recommending. I did a lot of cocaine and MDMA and mushrooms at a time in my life. It gives you new perspectives on things. Don't lose yourself to these substances.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Most bodybuilders are insecure little bitches.

[–]fartt1231 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

or insecure little bitches become bodybuilders and some don't grow out of it.

[–]Aestheticcunt19961 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah. I feel like many of them try to cover up the insecurity that they have deep down inside. I'm quite ripped and look like a model, I'm talking the best looking guy 99% of the times when I'm in a room. Still, I am aware of the fact that showing off and posing with an appearance like mine will leave the impression that I'm insecure and people don't like that. It sounds like I'm bragging but I'm not. I observed that it's mostly the lifters who are in their first 5 years of lifting that are obsessed with their muscularity and therefore come across as arrogant and insecure bitches who define themselves over lifting, which is mostly true. The mature lifters are still conscious of their appearance and the impression they make by it, but they just dont give way less of a fuck over time. I hate that people project the impression they get from these insecure bitches onto me. Those insecure, compensating little bitches are the people who stain the public image of lifters.

[–]send_it_for_the_boys-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I had lifted from 15-19 and felt confident in my strength and things but not with women or with men bigger or higher power than me, I’d look in the mirror in disgust all the time of how much bigger I needed to be all the time, which led to eating tonsss of shit food for calories and getting very dirty bulky.

[–]acp_rdit1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Get a public facing job

[–]Darth_Zerker1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Honestly, I recommend enlisting in the Army; that'll expose you to a wide variety of people, which can help with your social skills.

For resources on social skill theory, I recommend 'The Power of Meeting New People' by Debra Fine, as well as 'Captivate' by Vanessa Van Edwards, and 'The Definitive Book of Body Language' by Allan and Barbara Pease.

[–]bettywhiteishot1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Any branch but the army bud. Join the navy and see the fucking world. Get paid to visit countries no one else sees in their life and experience different cultures, fuck these foreign broads.

I agree though step out your comfort zone. That shit turns you into a man

[–]jjj25761 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

How far in the sidebar are you?

[–]_Tactleneck_1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

For me, I read no more mr nice guy twice and a lot clicked. You have a right to happiness and fulfillment. I journaled a lot to get my thoughts, pains, fears, goals, etc out in the open. Then built plans around how to change the life I had into the life I wanted. Just make a little progress each day. I’ve been unplugged for 4-5 years and eventually you won’t need to check in here or as questions all the time. But for now, focus on where you want to go next, try shit, fail at it, laugh and try again. It’ll be weird and awkward and painful, but it’ll be worth it.

[–]1XXXMersenne3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

NoFap, Watch old school RSD, Go out on Uni nights and have sex with girls.

[–]BeppeGrillo6660 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I disagree with people who say to you to doing more things/having hobbies. "Normal people" don't need hobbies to make friends. If you're naturally sociable, friends come without doing barely nothing. School/work/uni are more than enough.

You can't hardly change how you are, try to like yourself more.

Pay an Escort if you're a virgin, it's the best way to stop watching porn compulsively.

[–]ixyfang0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No. You must do something to add value to the group. Being sociable is an act and adds value. Think of yourself as a highly specialized service. You have to market yourself to make people want to ‘spend’ time with you.

No. (Porn) addiction is the result of a fried dopamine system.

[–]adamxchris0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I Remember when i discovered Redpill back then i was miserable,depressed,ugly, kinda FAT,had severe social anxiety( i was even scared of cashiers) but since i discovered the Redpill i found out that my life is a crap but reading thousands of posts here they gave me Hope for better life,the transformations,the truths,lifehacks, now i AM about to turn 19 in october, so in 2+ years i have changed my life forever, at beggining i wanted to know how to have girlfriend, but finally i inderstood that girls will come, trust me on this one, do not focus on getting girlfriend, focus on fuxking yourself because if u wont You will be miserable for rest of the life, many people on Redpill think,And they will tell You IT is all about pussy,for god sake, trust me IT isn't worth anything, right now focus on Your look,(IT will boost Your confidence as hell) focus on how to talk to people,i know IT is very hard to start,when i was starting cold approaching i was thinking (what will she,he(they) think of me?) And You know what? They just do not fucking care, they do not care about Your past, They wont remember that shitty first approach You make I went to gym,focused on clothes,care of Your skin,Your hair, focus on fucking vitamins,diet,exercise that shit will boost Your testosterone thru the fckin roof Do not know how to gain social skills? Ask yourself a question, what would You use IT for ? Get promotion? Get pussy? Get fucking friends? There You go, now You have Your answers just approach as many people as possibile And do not put so much pressure on yourself,focus on body language,get muscle,boost Your testosterone, life on Redpill is fucking easy, You just have to know how to filter the shot people are sometimes posting here, REDPILL was never about women, life is not about women, do not worry about rejection And if You will work Your ass off on improving yourself, Guys will want You to be their leader And you will be the one who will reject the pussies And shitty friends, Conclusion? Here You go! Read the fucking sidebar again,done? Do IT again because i think You didnt? Make yourself a PRIZE, hard work=easy life Easy work=hard life If You want Ask question pm me, just go and fucking do something

[–]SalporinRP0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Join clubs dude. Easiest way to break out of your shell and it will force you to socialize.

[–]Coumadin120 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

As someone who has also struggled with social anxiety, depression, and self-esteem, I can relate to much of what you have said. I, too, also found solace in lifting weights regularly and quickly realized it drastically improved many other areas of my life, both physically and mentally/ socially. I ended up going TOO extreme with it, though, looking back on it, and from age 19-25 made bodybuilding my main focus in life. I don't regret having done it and learned much about myself during that time, but I do feel I wan't balanced nor at peace/ fully comfortable with myself, despite looking "amazing" to your average person. I was still searching. At 33 now, TRP and elements of stocism and Buddhism have put me on, what I feel to be, a much better path, for what that is worth. I still struggle with social anxiety and confidence issues/ asserting myself when I should, but I am much, much more at ease in my own skin, so to speak.

One strategy that I have been using the past couple of years and have found to help me to become more comfortable/ extroverted (when it benefits me to be so) is by listening to podcasts MUCH more frequently that I had previously. I have about 8 main ones that I 'rotate' through and covering multiple subjects of interest. For example, on my commute to work, I'll put on one. On my lunch, put on a different one, then on my way home put on another different one. While making dinner, again, put on a 4th. While showering/ grooming, a 5th. At the gym, a 6th, etc. etc. You get the idea. Most of them involve more than one individual talking so they are usually discussions between 3+ people. I've noticed that by hearing so many different yet somewhat familiar voices pretty much on the daily that I've grown WAY more at-ease when hearing actual peoples voices or when engaging in conversations of my own. It feels more second nature and I am less critical of myself in what I say or would usually overthink on. I hope some of that makes sense. Good luck man. Lots of good advice here in the other comments.

[–]RedPillAlphaBigCock0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

join a hobby

[–]redpill_scientist920 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Start working out and going outside, don’t be a fucking vampire. Give up video games and quit wacking off. Go into monk mode for a couple months. Start going to bars by yourself.

When you’re feeling a little more comfortable but want to do something crazy go to an electronic or funktronica or jam band show and try to find some molly or ecstasy. Take a tiny bit and see how you feel. If you feel good in an hour take a tiny bit more. Don’t over do it and don’t re dose after the 2nd time.

This isn’t the most redpilled advice but it works and it changed my life. Be careful and test your shit, don’t get stuck in your head too much and more than anything have a good time.

[–]ManOfTheTimes0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You may want to dig into the sidebar a little more deeply. At this point in your life, you want to be working extremely hard at building wealth and setting tangible goals to achieve that wealth. You should be thinking about developing sales skills, real estate ownership, and fall back/transferable skills such as computer programming or cloud-related. I wouldn't invest much time at all into heavy socializing until you are wealthy. The (older) Wall Street Playboys material is very good for outlining a successful life track.

I'm older but I still have several goals (missions) that I target at any one time. Here are a couple: 1) I want to lead my recreational hockey league in scoring so I have to make clear and trackable improvements in power skating, stickhandling, shooting and fitness. 2) I want to be able to work remotely from South America so I have to modify my skillset from data center-centric to cloud-centric IT skills. 3) I want to look extremely handsome so I had to dial up my fashion/appearance game.

[–]ixyfang0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

  1. Find a doctor, PA, NP that specializes in Testosterone Replacement Treatment (TRT). Get your Testosterone and estrogen levels checked. Your age and activity levels do not matter. Just do it.

  2. Research L-Tyrosine, Citocoline and SAM-e. They can help fix your Dopamine system.

  3. Weights are good but they do not satisfy the primal need for combat. Weights are not a threat. Find a school that teaches Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. Go there and talk to the instructor. Take a class and sign up. BJJ will change your life. Don’t wait to get in shape for BJJ. There is no such thing. Body builders come in and are exhausted because BJJ is the only way to get in shape for BJJ. You will find a brotherhood that will give solid advice about anything.

  4. Check out YouTuber ‘Charisma on Command’. He gives clear concrete examples of what to do in different social situations.

  5. Find the film Swingers (1996) and watch it every day for 1 week. It was written and stars Jon Favreau - Happy from Iron Man. It is about a guy trying to figure out how to be cool around girls and get over his last relationship. It is a cult classic for very good reasons.



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