Happy Saturday, ladies!

I'm a first-year PhD student in computer science, which is a male-dominated field, and I'm hoping to have a career as a research scientist at a company/think tank when I've graduated. (I have no interest in staying in academia). I'm also very athletic -- I am currently training for my fourth half-marathon, I've recently gotten into cycling, and I also lift when I'm not training for a race. There's a lot of traditionally masculine characteristics that I have picked up over the years that allow me to do well (e.g. a competitive edge, physical strength/endurance, assertiveness, leadership, etc.)

I'm making this post to open up a discussion and to say that no, RPW is not incompatible with these aspects of my lifestyle. Here are some examples:

  • I still submit to my Captain and allow him to lead me. I get pushy and do whatever I have to in order to get a paper submitted on time to a conference, and I might pick apart people's proofs/arguments in my research left and right. But I trust and love my Captain. What counts is how I treat him. He is also very VERY athletic, so I always trust his judgment about running/biking/racing. But he has no background in CS, and his job is in construction, so he's been kind enough to trust my judgment within the context of my field and to give me support and reassurance whenever things get tough.
  • I present a feminine appearance on campus/work. Pretty simple: I take care of my health, wear my hair down, wear feminine clothing/makeup, pretty much follow a lot of the style tips here. Cotton floral dresses and mascara really do bring all the boys to the yard. Also, you *can* buy feminine athletic wear.
  • I'm driven but not bitchy. For example, if I'm asked to help a colleague revise a paper, I will be ruthless in my critical notes and highlight everything wrong with it. But I am always sweet as pie, and never rude. In my athletic endeavors, I am stubborn about my training, but I do not take it out on others if I have a bad run, for example. And I always ALWAYS cheer other people on.
  • Just be nice to people. This goes without saying.

The short of it is: CONTEXT. Who/what is the recipient of that masculine energy inside of you? I give mine to problem sets/academic papers/work projects/workouts/athletic goals. Who/what is the recipient of that feminine energy inside of you? I give mine to my Captain/others around me/animals/my body.

Please share your own thoughts in the comments!