My 9 month LTR is doomed isn't it?

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September 14, 2019

Started in that I came from a weak frame the first couple months. Then I found rp and tried to salvage. Last few months she's been distant and acting weird. Anyway she tells me today that she's gonna miss the Halloween party I'm throwing at my place to go to a Marine Corps ball with a couple of her friends. She said the guy that invited her is a friend she used to work with. Lol should I just break up with her now? I'm kinda excited to go back to spinning plates anyway but wondering if I'm reading this correctly

Post Information
Title My 9 month LTR is doomed isn't it?
Author hedden93
Upvotes 135
Comments 97
Date 14 September 2019 06:38 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
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framelong term relationshipplate

[–]Seoul_Brother211 points212 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, move on bro.

She’s looking for a marine to sweep her off her feet

[–]SeasonedRP333 points334 points  (24 children) | Copy

Her accepting an invitation from a guy to go to a Marine Corps ball instead of going to a party her LTR is throwing means the LTR is over. You don't need to break up with her. By choosing to go out with this guy, she's already done the breaking up. Ignore her and go forward with you plan of spinning plates.

[–]ThrowawayYAYAY200281 points82 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]Truedemocracy520 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy

yep. A ball where she will he dressed up, drinking, and dancing with another guy dressed up who clearly has the hots for her is her saying it’s fucking over

Her being distant is starting the unwinding phase so it’s not as painful for you.

[–]DerpJungler21 points22 points  (19 children) | Copy

I recommend breaking up with her just to show her that his frame is there and so that he won't feel like she cheated on him, because that's inevitable.

[–]Bascome4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why show her anything? To what end?

[–]ogkushinjapan22 points23 points  (17 children) | Copy

Nope that’s petty af. Just hardcore next n ghost her. Go lift weights spin plates n catch up with the boys

[–]Truedemocracy51 point2 points  (16 children) | Copy

Ghosting is for pussies

[–]DTJ131319 points20 points  (3 children) | Copy

The ghosting tactic should be used in certain situation. This situation definitely screams ghost her. But...if she was a nice girl who you lost feelings for and she still had feeling for you then I would break up with her in person. Then go back to plate spinning.

The fact that she rejected her LTR’s party for a Marine Corp Ball is a slap in the face. I wouldn’t be surprised if she had plans on riding the CC that night. This relationship is over. I would definitely ghost her.

[–]VigilantSmartbomb-4 points-3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It really depends if he can use the breakup as a stepping stone or not. If it’s gonna make his frame better overall for the next one do it. If not then yeah ghost

[–]CDBaller2 points3 points  (11 children) | Copy

Overwrought drama breakups are for women. They're on the same page.

[–]--StormKing--4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is the best advice.

Just move on and never explain, she isn’t in an LTR if she’s accepting dates from a Marine.

Her not having “closure” is the best way to deal.

Have fun and enjoy new plates.

[–]jackandjill221 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Perfect reply.

[–][deleted] 59 points60 points  (0 children) | Copy

should I just break up with her now?

Yeah, that's exactly what you should do. Have fun at your halloween party.

[–]Filmguy000110 points111 points  (4 children) | Copy

I once worked at a hotel banquet hall, and there was a Marine Corps ball going on one night. No homo but the room was filled with super attractive studs in uniforms. They were all in tip top shape and had an intensity about them, from what I observed. And I remember their dates were women that looked like Instagram models. So its basically a den of sexually primed beautiful young people; all the dudes are ready to shoot their loads and the chicks are as moist as towel in a swimming pool.

Your "LTR" isn't going to "YOUR" party to go to ^^THAT^^ the math, brother.

[–]krunchtimer18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy

No homo but the room was filled with super attractive studs in uniforms.

There are only a few careers where "workout a LOT and stay in top shape" is part of the job description, to name a few...

Pro Athlete

Action Movie Actor


(and you're now competing with one of those in that list - weightlifting has to become part of your life if you want to compete with that)

[–]frick-a-frack26 points27 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah. It’s over. She’s been distant for months.... during an 8 month LTR. She’s already been fucking someone else.

She’s choosing to hang out with marines than be at her LTR’s party.

Discard her already. She discarded you months ago.

[–]TheRedPillMonkey24 points25 points  (0 children) | Copy

Normally I'd tell you to give her enough rope to hang herself but don't cut her down when she does. In other words, don't assume she's going to cheat but be prepared to end it immediately when she does.

But not in this case. This is more of a respect issue. A 9 month LTR is throwing a Halloween party and she just announced she's not going so she can be another man's date to some ball? Nope. That's disrespectful. She knows it's wrong and you'd be upset which is why she didn't bother to ask or discuss it and she'd rather be some other man's date than your gf at your party.

Break up with her today over it.

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev21 points22 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dump that Bitch.

The "couple of friends" she is going with are that guy and his penis.

[–]Fuktiga_mejmejs17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ghost her, Enjoy your party and get laid.

[–]ChemicalGiraffe12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]CaptainKidd9620 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like it. What she meant is this: I prefer hanging out with this ex coworker and my girlfriends than with you.

IMO, if u start out blue pilled and have 0 frame it will be kind of hard to do a 180 in your relationship. I kinda managed to shift the power dynamic in my previous ltr but the girl was still a pain in the ass to deal with at times so the ltr ended.

Like myself, you sound way to young to waste your energy on bs like this. Invest your time in bettering yourself physically and intelectually. Spend that new free time planning and developing skills that will help you in the future, pick up a new hobby and spin them plates (but don't invest too much time in dealing with their bullshit. Remember, it's plate spinning only, you're not in an ltr)

[–]masterpiece0013 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

She's fucking someone else, or wants to.

[–]Greek-God-Brody4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

she gonn' get dicked down

[–]BluBlac599 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy

I think she has broken up with you. I was a in the Marines for 8 yrs. She's not going to be the same.

[–]Truedemocracy5-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

Those marine balls a fuck frenzy?

[–]BluBlac591 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Look at it this way, her and two friends are going to a weekend long party with young strong horny guys all around them. Girls like sex as much as men. I think those girls will all get laid very well. And like it.

[–]zboo1h3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

9 months isn't a LTR. She's going to a party with a marine, probably to get shitfaced surrounded by maximum testosterone without you.

This reads like a cuckold fantasy post.

[–]BajaGhia4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

I think more important than the fact that you have to dump is how you do it.

There's the ghost option, but that may not be logistically possible if she has stuff at your house, etc.

If you have to have closing conversations with her, which you prolly do, how you going to do that? You'll hear talk of being cold and emotionless, but I always think that let's her know you got hurt and are covering it up. Try being the friendly cop. The one who says lightly, "Well, you were going too fast and don't have insurance, sooo, I'm going to need you to sign here if you could. Yep, and now we're going to have to arrest you. Just turn around please and put your hands behind your back. That's great."

Keeping it matter of fact and with an IDGAF attitude will help. Any feelings of loss or hurt are regarding the loss of a possibility of a LTR, not the loss of her specifically. She has proven that she is trash and you should regard her with the same eye as you do the trash you take to the curb.

Sorry so long, this post was more for me than you.

[–]Truedemocracy50 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I’d either tell her what she did was fucked up or tell her you’re seeing someone else (lie) just to get her hamster revved up

[–]evader99924 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

The answer is simple.

Text her "Cool. We're done. Have fun at the ball."

And don't text her anything else. Ever again, unless she literally comes begging back to you(which she probably won't).

The fact that she's blowing off your party for this ball is a sign that you've probably acted like a beta(or done something else to make her stop caring). This is your last chance to get your frame back. In her eyes, you're insignificant right now. You're not even worth her time enough for one night. So text her this, get your frame back, and don't text her anything else. If she wants to keep the relationship going, you can respond to her pleas in a few weeks. Sounds like she's already mentally broken up with you, though.

[–]Sendmeloveletters0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is the best way to do it.

[–]Dimenzije902 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ghost her

[–]WheresWilliam2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Make it a clean break and keep your chin up, I really hope you enjoy your party. Best of luck, man.

[–]AP_Jack2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yup, dump her. She's going on a date with another man rather than hanging out with you.

[–]Hypnot0ad2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

She's no longer into you but doesn't want to break up with you because either she doesn't want to look like the bad guy or she doesn't want to hurt your feelings. She's trying to get you to be the one to end it.

[–]Sendmeloveletters0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]3chazthundergut2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy


Save yourself that last shred of dignity and end it yourself. Today.

[–]throwawayycheyeah2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

She sounds like she is definetly planning to cheat of she hasn't already. I'd suggest telling her no hard feelings but the relationship isnt going to work out. If she askes why just say some shit about feelings have changed and you dont wanna drag it out. Shell probably put on a show like shes upset but be okay with the break up because now shes free to get fucked like a whore after her ball. And I can almost guarantee that shes gonna try to worm her way back into your life after the ball and she realizes she was just the girl for the night at the ball. That's when you need to ghost her.

No petty shit, no anger or trying to get back at her. Just walk away and move on to better shit with as little drama as possible. Goodluck man.

[–]ogkushinjapan1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dude ur the party host(situational alpha/preselection) and have perfect logistics.

Won’t be surprised if u even land a threesome lol

[–]Truedemocracy51 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Holy shit dude she’s going to a marine corps ball with a “friend” she used to work with?

It has never been more fucking over than it is for you. this stuff is clear as crystal when watching from the outside, so feel for you being attached. Your gut is almost always right here. Going to a marine corps ball where she will be dolled up with another guy, also dressed up and fit, is so much disrespect to your relationship can’t even begin to say. Dude has stones to ask her knowing she’s in a relationship

[–]Velebit1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

It is over. Not formally but she does not care any more. She is trying to monkey branch so you should too. Use her to show preselection. Make sure to to touch her in public in front of other women like you would a first date/close friend. Then you can talk to other women.

[–]TuhTodayJr1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Is this a troll post. Like dude cmon aren’t we on trp?

[–]Truedemocracy52 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

I do want to see the same question verbatim on the relationships sub to see their response tho...

[–]TuhTodayJr3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hmmmm who knows.. most of the advice will be to “talk to her” “express your feelings”

[–]InsidiousCurve1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

She's trying to move you down on the ladder, as a second option now. LTR are a waste of time, girl always needs to imagine you have other options to put down for you.

[–]Bedtimeshine1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Her being available to even be asked to a ball by another man is a deal breaker. Honestly though it sounds like your not hurt too hard emotionally. Do my advice. Use this as a learning experience. Learn the game. No need to even break up with her. No need to even talk about this again. Experiment. Let her do her and you do you. I would be fucking another girl that night and I would not hide one bit of my desire or effort for whichever girl I go after from anybody at the party. Zero shame. Full public view.

[–]Red_Pill_Brotherhood1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Holy fuck dude, move on. She is cancelling plans with you(her bf) to go out to a ball(dance event) with another guy. Also, throw in your lack of frame and her acting distant.

Do yourself a favor and dump her now.

[–]antichrist_redpill2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your ltr is doomed, break up and move on. Dont cling to it and never start an LTR again for the next 10 years.

[–]BurnoTaurus2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Tell her that if she goes to the marine corps ball she better ride marine cock extra hard.

As a man it is your duty to police her behaviour. You have to simultaneously let her know that you know what shes doing, and that what she's doing is shitty. Do so in a way that gets her to question her own logic.

Basically this sets it up so that if she does go, she cant enjoy herself because she wont be slutting it up at your expense. Thats the whole point of her telling you she's missing your party, and also the "he's just a friend"

if she doesnt lie to you, she's just a slut going out to get dicked, but if she does lie to you, she can work all kinds of narratives in her head. Narratives like "I snuck away from my shitty boyfriend to come find a better guy, Im a liberated woman!"

"he would never let me come here! he's so controlling! I had to lie to him to get away"

[–]alvarocame3 points4 points  (13 children) | Copy

I would say keep plating her, total indiference, just sex and no emotional or diner dates, and make her break by herself, that way you increase your value, and make it more difficult for her to get over you

[–]GonadGravy8 points9 points  (12 children) | Copy

No plating after this level of disrespect.

[–]alvarocame0 points1 point  (11 children) | Copy

what you lose in a plate relationship? nothing

[–]GonadGravy0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

In this situation? Your dignity and self well as her respect for you.

[–]alvarocame0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

emmm, nop, you having a girl coming over to your place to fuck and then go is not losing your self respect, you have it backwards my friend

[–]GonadGravy-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

So you allow girls to humiliate and disrespect you for the chance at sex? How’s that working out?

[–]alvarocame-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

again, you have it backwards, in a plate relationship you don't lose anything, keep nexting man

[–]GonadGravy0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Did you read the OP? So if you were in the OP’s position, and your LTR went out to get drunk and gaped out by a Marine or two while she’s in a relationship with’ll take sloppy seconds when she gets home?

That’s cuck behavior, kid. I guess you must feel lucky to be getting any female attention at all.

If an LTR tried pulling that on me it’s a hard next. There’s too many women out there, I don’t need to tolerate that behavior for sex I could easily get from someone like OP’s LTR.

[–]alvarocame-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

no need to discuss with random incel guys in the net man, read again what I imply and stop hamstering your furious hamster...if they don't live together, he can pull the just plate thing, don't know why in here yet, incels everywhere dictating behavior when they don't know

[–]peaceandlug0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

He doesn't have that option. She dictates what she'll do, she ain't gonna be his booty call.

[–]GonadGravy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly. His frame crumbled under the weight of her unbridled hypergamy.

[–]alvarocame0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

you may have a point in that, she is not gonna accept

[–]ToraChan230 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah cut your losses. She is getting Marine dick that night

[–]Crixusgannicus0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hmmm usually Jodie is the guy who ISN'T in the Corps....

[–]vajav0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ghost her and be sure to get plenty of ass at your party.

[–]swishandswallow0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

And being truthful, if she's being distant and acting weird, then chances are you're not doing it right.

[–]777views0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Makes me angry. Whatever, I'm sorry dude. Forget her.

[–]legaxo0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

i would love to hear the conclusion of this story if you go through with any sort of action with the advice here

[–]hedden93[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'll update. I'm gonna break things off tomorrow. Some good advice here. I'll be calm and IDGAF attitude, hand her her stuff and say it's over.

[–]IV-IVm-I0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

do what you want to do

[–]Lambdal70 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

She invites a friend that is male? Yeah definitely break up /s.

[–]hedden93[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I should clarify, she's going with two female friends but her male friend in the military invited her. Also it's out of state and so her and her girlfriends are gonna drive like 12 hours round-trip to get there and back lmao

[–]Sendmeloveletters0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You already know this is sus. Tell her no, or dump her.

[–]WizardSenpai0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

didn't read past the title, If you're wondering this its already over.

[–]l4w_z0ne0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Doesnt matter if you read it correctly or not. If you're excited about spinning plates just break up already

[–]Sendmeloveletters0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yes. Dump her and make it cold. Make it hurt. Go no contact on her. Do it before the party. It will be hard, but it will not be as hard as coming to terms with the way SHE will dump YOU after getting dicked down bc she’s mad at you for not releasing her when she clued you in that it was time to do so. Women expect men to take the lead not just at the beginning of a relationship, but also at its end too.

Google the pdf of Women’s Infidelity. It’s a wrap, she knows it, and she is deliberately telling you in girl language so that you can dump her first, so she can tell other guys her sob story and get that sweet marine D.

You know what’s happening so make it happen by your own terms. The relationship is already over in her mind and in her heart and she thinks she is doing you a kindness by allowing you to piece it together for yourself before the final blow, so you can be ready for it, or save face by leaving first which is a win win in her eyes because she gets what she wants but it makes her look less selfish and less slutty.

[–]NappyNigga0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How is 9 months a LTR? Are you in middle school?

[–]ngyuhnang0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She’s soft nexting you so you should do the same thing, go to your party and bang new girls

[–]peaceandlug0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Did you note that she told you, not asked you???

Brah, she respects you about as much as a traffic cop.

[–]boom_bostic0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like whatever you tweaked about yourself, your personality after swallowing the red pill isn’t working very well.

Think about it.

Time to re-evaluate.

On your current relationship. Yes, if I were you, I would emotionally detach myself from her in order to prepare for when she officially makes it known that she’s banging this other guy. I would continue inserting using her for sex and begin thinking about greener pastures.

Don’t be butthurt about it...especially to her face. Act as if it’s all great in life, things are on the up & up.

[–]Freedom__Fighter0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It ain’t doomed, it’s finished. Move on

[–]eliteomegabc0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

From experience bro dump her ass, if he was really just a friend she wouldn’t ditch her LTR for a friend of hers. Obviously something must be there for her to want to go with him. Just recently got dumped in my LTR cause I believed the guys she was snapping and messaging were nuts friends but in reality she was being a whore. I was beta but now I discovered the red pill, haven’t contacted her in 3 weeks now and she’s now trying to get my attention in anyway possible. By blocking people I know, talking to a friend of mine and petty shit like that. Just be careful I know love, can mask a lot of shit and make us guys in denial that our little angel would never do a thing like that. NEXT

[–]oooKenshiooo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Shit. She is a patriot AND a whore.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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