This shit actually works. Just growing a pair and speaking to girls like you'd speak to guys but with a bit more self-confidence at least gives you the chance to close with a number. Now I'm lost on where to go from here.

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September 18, 2019
62 upvotes

I'm back on my grind of getting a number a day from a chick, and also speaking to a few guys every day (on the elevator, bus, street, class etc.) to touch up on my social skills. I've noticed that the way you speak to girls is almost the same way you'd speak to a guy, except with more of a "risk" involved, and more tension.

Today, I started off the day by speaking to random people in my class and being kind rather than "nice". If someone helped me, I would appreciate it, but I wouldn't grovel. Of my own volition, I would repay them the help tenfold because I wanted to. It's hard to put this into words, but fuck, it feels amazing. It's like I'm seeing people on a human level now. I even spoke to a girl in class and ranted about how fucking monotone the prof was and was wondering why she was scrolling through on her phone in the back of class. Her SMV was low af, but I'd have never done that before.

Anyways, I went to this marketing meeting and got a chick's facebook and also introduced myself in front of the club. I was nervous af but I grabbed the opportunity by the balls so I could build my frame and toughen myself. I also joined a group convo and went right for the chick and introduced myself, thenspoke to her for a while without cowering (though there were moments where I felt pressure or might have fucked up my expression a bit, like puckering my lips randomly or making my expression where I look up when I'm thinking), and I also sparked up a conversation with one dude when that same chick tried interjecting and I pretended not to notice while speaking to other guy (I respect the people I'm talking to). I kid you not, I felt like she mentally put me higher when I continued the convo with the guy and focused without getting distracted from her trying to interject. I wish I could verbalize this**. This might be a fucked up way to approach, but the only way I can see myself getting chicks right now is if I treat them like the guys who are distant at first, but end up following me when I bring my energy, and then I need to maintain their lower status by staying as the leader. I'll probably have to change my tactic in the future, but right now, I feel like it'll get my foot in the door and get me comfortable.** I asked the chick for her snap or number, and she seemed stunned since I was so forward rather than ask for her linkedin, but then she ended up giving me her facebook. Ngl, my heart jumped when she reacted that way, but I tried to stay unreactive. Though, I don't see how I can flirt with a chick on facebook that I met at a club (don't shit where you eat), but we'll see where this goes.

TL;DR Anyways, I'm getting better at getting numbers/info and being social with girls, now I have no fucking clue how to escalate. I'm complete trash at this. I've literally read the sidebar tons of times, and other books on theory (from mark manson, david deangelo, neil strauss) but I'm asking for a step-by-step from your personal experience once you get a number, and what helped you succeed. I'm too socially autistic to successful apply the sidebar, and I realise that I learn from simple examples and constant practice


Post Information
Title This shit actually works. Just growing a pair and speaking to girls like you'd speak to guys but with a bit more self-confidence at least gives you the chance to close with a number. Now I'm lost on where to go from here.
Author Weeeyerd
Upvotes 62
Comments 15
Date 18 September 2019 01:45 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/253712
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/d5qset/this_shit_actually_works_just_growing_a_pair_and/
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Comments

[–]AscensionExperiments33 points34 points  (8 children) | Copy

You're putting in good work, man. Keep at it, but also give yourself a bit of a pat on the back. Don't let up.

How to escalate; you've got her number. Find or host a party. Invite her, in a broad number of people you've invited, but don't phrase it like a question. "There's a party friday at The Staggering Beetle, I'll be there around 10"

You could text her this or do it in person. I prefer in person.

From there, continue to do what you have been doing- talk to many people, be lively, but when you come around her way, tease her. If she's a biker or party type chick, tease her with something like "Oh we pulled you into a party past 8:30PM?" or if she's the bookish type, "Aw fuck Amanda is here- look don't make this like last time where I had to stop you from downing a whole bottle of tequila" but obviously make it a joke, and don't say it in front of a lot of people or it'll piss her off. You'll learn to read the room and which kind of teasing to do with time.

Continue chatting, and begin doing a bit of push and pull- pushing is when you disqualify her from being a competitor for your dick (remember, YOU are the prize) with more teasing- such as "ah man I could never get with the nerdy type (like her), always in bed by 7PM sharp" (wait did I already use that one lol whatever) another example; "wait you're an atheist? damn I could never get with someone who doesn't know our holy lord Cthulu" -except as the joking progresses, start the pulling part of push and pull, where you escalate physically (while you both laugh, put your hand on her shoulder, next time her thigh- this will take practice to feel natural)

Other ways to escalate: have her draw something on you- "oh you're left handed? so you have shitty writing huh? No? lemme see" (she's the one touching you, but at YOUR command so this might help open up the clammy ones)

As she warms to you, escalate the touching, and separate her from the group. Dance with her, rub up on her, she'll rub up on you at this point if she's into it- from there you pull her by the hand to a dark corner and get some kissing done. Then you ask her if she wants to get some air- or, even better, tie it into something she mentioned earlier. Such as, you talked about board games- oh well I have this one you should try, let's go... ALWAYS leave it framed ambiguously when you're going to go fuck, otherwise she'll activate the Anti-Slut Defense, and that's game over in my experience.

Questions?

[–]Weeeyerd[S] 5 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy

Wow, thank you! This actually makes a lot of sense. I seriously appreciate the effort you put into mapping this out. I realize now how I've self-cucked so many times with girls. There's been tons of times where I got the girl and I isolated and she was following me and into me and into it, but then for one reason or another I would just go back to where the group is and pussy out. I can see some paths for growth now.

[–]AscensionExperiments1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

hell yeah. Glad to help man

[–]Weeeyerd[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I just remembered one last thing. Is there any other way to meet up with the girl outside of group events like parties, without decreasing interest? What about coffee or some date where you're moving?

[–]AscensionExperiments2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

You probably could, but let's be real, a girl is much more likely to give it up after a party than after a coffee date lol

[–]Weeeyerd[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

That's for sure. I guess it depends on what you're going for. Maybe I'm thinking too far ahead, but when I'm 35, it'll be harder to pick up at clubs or bars I feel, so the move to make at that point would probably be the relationship game or plates or w.e

[–]Sylvester_Sterone0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A coffee date would work if you go to multiple spots then an invite back to your place for “water” “using the bathroom” “drinking a protein shake” “ feeding my cat”

[–]superbad4life0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

But let's not forget that this is one. Although I agree with the technique, you need to also make sure you're getting different plates numbers/snaps/facebooks. This will allow you to build abundance mentality and prevent oneitious, but more importantly, it will give you a chance to practice. The practice will naturally lead to more confidence in your actions. Put into enough situations enough times, you'll be able to work a prospect no matter the situation because you've done it enough times.

And let's also be clear, if you fuck it up with this girl, you're not a failure. Go over what happened mentally, see if you broke a Cardinal Rule and then keep going. Making mistakes allows you to learn.

[–]farfrommyhome0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Damn this comment made me realize I'm missing so much in the middle part of my game. I've gotten in such a bad habit of expecting things to be easy and just jumping to the end.

[–]i-am-the-prize3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

facing your fears is worth it

1) you don't die

2) you realize it's mostly in your head (thinking about what if's)

3) it gets easier

i use meetup the app to find group events about shit just outside my normal interest/comfort zone. philosophy, bioethics, software development, politics, art, wine... i just show up without joining, but do rsvp. some are at happy hours, some libaries, some coffee shops, some museums, random new places to explore. show up with an open mind.

many of these are small and they're glad for 'new blood' to inject some fresh convo's (some of the regulars in all of these groups are mega tryhards where this topic is their fucking LIFE). I'm not looking for a new mate, but it would be dead easy to meet women this way, plenty are there, the outward quality varies with the topic of the meetup, as you'd expect, but like fruit on a vine...

yet to see a chad with frame at any of these, it's the opposite of a dance festival or muscle beach. go and face your fears and talk to them all.

[–]shelteringloon2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Step 1 - get a number

Step 2 - text

Mention something you talked about. Use humor. Keep it short. Setup a meeting of your choice.

Step 3 - meet

Use humor. Pass sit tests. Begin kino

[–]farfrommyhome0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Opening is by far the weakest part of my game because I neglect it so much. You're a good inspiration OP. Seriously, I need to start having more balls like you do.

[–]Weeeyerd[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You've got this

[–]AceMav210 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Do you make commission every time you get a number....?

[–]Weeeyerd[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, a 2% increase in frame



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