Why do you think men find attractive a larger pool of people?

petrichordium · 2019-06-24T18:03:46+00:00

TLDR: men have a much larger space for “i would put my dick there but not be seen in public with her or acknowledge our connection as socially real in any way, but that pussy satisfies my lust pangs even if I feel nothing toward the human attached to it.”

So yes if you mean women find fewer men “attractive” in that way, you don’t need all those stats.

Imagine your metabolism shifted downward so hard that eating felt optional. You no longer feel this insistent hunger that seeks out food, any food. All day long.

Would you keep shoveling in junk food every few hours or would you tone it down? Me? I’d become that prickly french food critic from Ratatouille: “if I don’t love it, I don’t swallow.”

^ literally most women

goatismycopilot · 2019-06-24T18:08:39+00:00

Because men are looking at women as being attractive enough to have sex with, which is 99.9999999999% of women and those are the ones that are alive. Most men do not care who they have sex with. Bowl of warm jello? Woo hoo. Hole in the wall? Woo hoo. Average men are always, always, always going to struggle with getting casual sex. Super Chad whoever they are and rich dudes are not, they never did, they never will. In 1622 there was a Chad dude banging gross unwashed 1620's women, he smelled bad as well so it all cancelled out. Obviously he was not hanging out in the Puritan community or in Jamestown but there have always been men who were able to seduce women and the vast majority of them were bad at it. They went for whores, picked up a gross disease or dysentery during some war and died. The other ones married some chick they did subsistence farming had ten kids and then everybody got wiped out by whatever disease was going around.

Barneysparky · 2019-06-24T19:58:03+00:00

One is more honest. I'm a attractive thin 50+ woman, but I don't do procedures or wear makeup, or heels, or anything that could say I'm sexually avaible. I have men my age who enjoy my company, often men enjoy being around me a lot and I could see them wanting to be closer if I wasn't married but they don't look at me as "a women they want to fuck" more like my husband is a lucky guy, because I'm a happy person who is pretty fun to be around, and tells awesome jokes sometimes, whose obviously low matinance for my husband. Some men my age find value in a thin woman whose not obsessed with the lasted beauty item or fashion trend, but is still kinda cool.

But yipee I am sexually invisible to young men. I'm Insta mom!

The reason why the survey was like that was that many young men took the survey and I'm not considered a "woman" to them, nor disabled women or obsess women ect. They are in all likelihood talking about their classmates. Women on the other hand are exposed to men's sexuality checking them out on a much broader scale. Women's responses might even include the 90 year old in the bus who tells her he wishes he was younger.

It's not about cause, is about perception. Women percieve even old men as sexual beings. Next time you are in Wal-Mart, honestly ask yourself how many of ALL the women you'd like to have sex with. (Not them give you a blow job in a glory hole)

grandmapurp · 2019-06-24T20:16:42+00:00

Women often complain that men immediately lump women into fuckable/not-fuckable categories and that women in the non-fuckable group are invisible. This would seem to hint at some truth there because there is no way your average guy is willing to fuck 95% of the women he encounters on a day to day basis! It just means that elderly women are invisible. Or they're talking to some college kid who lives in a little bubble entirely with young attractive people and never goes outside to go to the supermarket or do anything in the real world.

flamingoinghome · 2019-06-24T19:11:22+00:00

Holy confounding, Batman!

Men have generally higher sex drives--this is known, it's because of T. Whether they'd deign to be seen in public with all these women they're "attracted" to is another story.

(there also seems to be a thing where women take the subset of "men" much more literally than men take the subset of "women"--all those grannies they see in the supermarket aren't included in the stat. Women generally DO include old guys and their friend's dads and stuff, which brings down the number)

Also, 40% of couples meet "online"--not necessarily tinder/the swipe apps in general (I swear, the guys who don't know many women but are doubtful about tinder get REAL funny when you tell them about EHarmony and Match). So this idea that OLD is the end of the world is silly.

I also think the celibacy studies need to be clearer on whether or not everyone is heterosexual. The ones I've seen aren't--these women may be fucking each other.

wtknight · 2019-06-24T18:55:16+00:00

Women have a limited number of eggs and take on the risk of child bearing and a majority of the responsibility of child rearing. It is evolutionarily beneficial for them to be choosy. Sperm are plentiful. There is no evolutionary reason for men to be sexually choosy. The male desire for promiscuity is actually beneficial in preventing population bottlenecks.

_derekhawkins · 2019-06-24T18:02:11+00:00

What’s this! A post with studies rationally verifying what most men have been saying? Who would have thought.

Actuallyconsistent · 2019-06-24T19:28:22+00:00

No one is actually answering the why. Well, once again we find our answers in evolutionary psychology.

Women are the sexual selectors and men are the variance through which a species evolves.

It's why men have a wider bellcurve on literally everything than women. Men are more of an experiment to see which works best, while women are the selectors who pick the best males worth carrying on the species.

So men's motive is to fuck everything that moves. And if they're able to do that, he can continue to reproduce (the unarguable goal of every species). On the other hand, women are required to select based on what is best for her children, so she will be more selective in order to do what's best for her and her children in the long run.

TheBookOfSeil · 2019-06-24T18:37:39+00:00

I agree with the thesis as well, but also felt like I should add that there is a historical possibility that female preference wasn't a huge factor in mating behavior. Evidence for this would be shown by the fact that most men are indeed not very attractive to most women, and had men been the selected as opposed to the selector, men as a whole would be more physically attractive due to natural selection.

We can also however point to the possibility that male and female sexual preference and choices have stayed somewhat on par with each other because the human species doesn't mirror the sexual dimorphism of other species like the peacock where extreme difference in physical appearance can be observed.

passepar2t · 2019-06-25T06:58:24+00:00

Men are attracted to a larger pool of people... until they come. Then, a moment of Buddhist clarity settles over you, followed by an inrushing tide of shame and regret and the desire to gtfo.

itsokma · 2019-06-24T20:56:25+00:00

Testosterone.

Nodoxxintoxin · 2019-06-24T22:39:31+00:00

Reality check. This is not only what some men will fuck, this is what some men will PAY to fuck.

https://www.businessinsider.com/check-out-the-stunning-pictures-from-the-citigroup-trader-who-photographs-prostitutes-2012-2

pnadlerlaw · 2019-06-25T00:22:17+00:00

If you’re asking a genuine behavioral economics and evolutionary psychology question, then it’s interesting.

Up until 8,000 years ago, men didn’t really have the “luxury” to be “picky.” The genes 🧬 of men who were picky died off, as they died in fighting animals or other men, the elements or disease. The genes that did make it down the generations were from men who were more “flexible” with respect to partner selection. Thus, until 8,000 years ago, there was an evolutionary runoff trait of men being more “flexible” with partner selection when compared to women.

In addition to “time,” being “flexible” gave men negotiating and bargaining power. Negotiation leverage comes from one’s BATNA (best alternative to a negotiated agreement). Phrased differently, your bargaining power is only as good as your next best alternative. The alternative must be real, not theoretical. It must be an alternative that you would actually be satisfied with accepting.

As society became more organized and civilized, financial responsibility for children fell on the child’s “father.” This meant that men could not just “hit it and quit it.” The level of “investment” a man made from the consequences of sex were (in financial terms) substantially larger than that which women made (at the time).

So, men were selective, they did have preferences, they were not indiscriminate, but they also remained “flexible.” This allowed men to negotiate things like a “dowery” (now mostly a relic of the past) and other terms of the marital “contract.” If Woman A was driving a hard bargain, the man could easily abandon the negotiation and substitute her with Woman B just the same. (This also explains the primal fear women have regarding being easily replaceable, and wanting constant comforting of that insecurity through indicia that she is special and valuable to the man ... and irreplaceable).

Over the past 50 years, the social landscape has changed a lot. In most states and parts of the world, sex results in parental liability ONLY IF the woman wishes to continue a pregnancy to term. The man’s willingness or consent to prenatal liability and parenthood is completely irrelevant. So, for women, sex “may” have serious life-long consequences “if SHE doesn’t terminate an unwanted pregnancy.” For men, sex “may” have serious life-long consequences, “if SHE doesn’t terminate an unwanted pregnancy.”

From an economic perspective, men have substantially higher costs and risk of their offspring not thriving in society (which means, over time, maybe not this generation but the next, ultimately not surviving) merely by getting “involved” with the wrong woman. So, while still “flexible,” men are realizing that 95% is a little “too” flexible. There is no imminent or very likely risk of death. Simply put, there is no rush. Time is not of the essence for men anymore.

So, at the turn of the millennium, we are seeing something extremely interesting happen. Men are becoming more selective, and in doing so, are LOSING their bargaining power. When that emotionally well-adjusted, agreeable, beautiful, intelligent, athletic, musically talented Yale graduate from a family with a net worth of $500 million walks into a man’s life, it’s no longer, “pussy is pussy.” This “is” the top 1% of “life partners.” And if a man can’t discern between preferring this woman to another, then over time, his genetics will not “thrive,” and will eventually die off as a dish washer, or shoe repair man, or coal miner, or factory worker.

BUT, there’s no free lunch. If that’s the woman the man wants, and there is no “substitute” for her in his mind, then she holds all the power. She is his ONLY option, but that’s HIS CHOICE. He’s a prisoner of his own standards. And if taken to the extreme, his genetics will voluntarily not survive to the next generation as he fails to find a partner he considers acceptable or satisfactory.

So, it’s a balance. Top 1-2% is kind of ridiculous. 95% is kind of ridiculous. 10-20% is healthy.

theiamsamurai · 2019-06-25T03:25:40+00:00

Considering women end most relationships, and initiate most dead bedrooms, it's not outrageous to assume that they just want men less sexually than vice versa, and that when they do want them, it tends to be weak and/or temporary. How much sex gay guys have gives you an idea of how much hornier men are than women. Every "who's fucked more" game is won by gay guys with thousands of partners. If women were as horny as men, nothing would ever get done and we'd constantly fuck. Put TWO people with weak attraction together (lesbians), and you have higher break-up rates and higher rates of dead bedroom, and higher rejection rates in the process leading up to getting serious. Nothing surprising here.

[deleted] · 2019-06-25T04:49:09+00:00

If women were wired like men sexually then life would consist of pure fucking and most ppl would die from being oversexed

rhyth7 · 2019-06-26T18:08:05+00:00

More men would be attractive if they bothered to primp more and if they participated in things like dieting and skincare. A lot of guys have this attitude of not caring if they die early and so they eat and drink as they please, not taking their attractiveness into account.

[deleted] · 2019-06-24T18:53:07+00:00

Who cares why?

It means the odds of her actually liking you are 2%

The odds of her leeching off your wallet til Chad shows up is 70% of 50%.

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H2orocks3000 · 2019-06-25T00:22:30+00:00

One thing I think I figured out that as women became more empowered in various ways (and this tech isn’t their fault it might just be what is), as they where tech the ones more reared to be caring nurturing empathetic typically as based on gender norms.

So the dramatic shift,

Then remember childhood trauma is our largest public health crisis of the moment above and beyond all lathers because it actually leads to the others.

38% of people experience emotional abuse on average of 7 years.

A lot of people have ace scores!

Now then remember makes where meant to be more not so emotional in many ways - at least that is the idea behind “toxic masculinity” which is just masculinity lacking emotional intelligence.

Now that we also know guys freinds are not good at expressing feelings and validating and being vulnerable together. It’s why there are often bromance jokes because that’s the closest they can unconsciously get without becoming conscious of unrecognized needs.

Then womens freinds is I understand correct are often the opposite.

So take this innstride that we put this all together and it’s the guys that have been lacking emotional validation on a overall net average which when done regularly leads to growth in who people are.

So we get this issue with women moving on and up on their own and then where most guys used to turn to for this kinda validation it’s just flat not there.

Yes / no- thoughts opinions?

HossMcDank · 2019-06-26T07:18:17+00:00

Because men have drastically higher sex drives than women. I don't know why we can admit that men are physically stronger than women by a large margin, but the aforementioned obvious fact gets such a bad reaction.

NaturalQueer · 2019-06-29T21:26:52+00:00

Weird! Maybe I am just a hoe but I have found many of my male friends attractive. And I would say I find at the very least like 70-80% of men attractive in one way or another. I mean not everyone is going to be a sold 10 out 10 but most men aren't ugly hell most people aren't ugly. I walk into a class at uni and most of the people in there are pretty cute.

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Leonos_ · 2019-07-21T23:53:06+00:00

Not if they happen to be gay. Gay men are incredibly peeky and shallow.

Can't blame them. I am too.

Bayard20 · 2019-06-24T22:53:13+00:00

r/askgaybros : Are men hypersexual compared to women? Is it an evolutionary thing?

I think it's less that men are hypersexual, and more that women are asexual.

Emervila · 2019-06-24T18:20:21+00:00

Women fictitiously increase their SMV among other things by making themselves scarce, if they start banging widely they'd lose SMV quickly since men would require less effort and would be less thirsty to be willing to give resources to them

NockerJoe · 2019-06-24T18:40:55+00:00

Love the call out of making dating markets efficient with apps. Feel previously no one had a good idea how attractive they were except for those on far ends of the bell curve both ways. Sites like hot or not, picture raters, asking friends if they are attractive was big because no one knew and no one could judge themselves.

Dating apps lay this to bare.

But yea - the answer is evolution.

sk0756 · 2019-06-24T19:27:10+00:00

We men just want to spread our greatness to as many women as we can, if we could.

MyDogLovesCorn · 2019-06-24T19:32:40+00:00

LOL women SAY they find 1-2% attractive, but A) they're lying and B) the two sexes handle and view the very concept of "attractiveness" itself very differently.

Women also "cheat" by using makeup, curating their online appearances, form fitting clothing, etc. They generally put in more upfront work. Period.

VirginPrideWorldWide · 2019-06-25T00:29:24+00:00

Because we're not emotional terrorists like women. Men are chill, we let all the miscellaneous stuff that is attached to a pussy do what it wants, so long as we get access to said pussy.

I imagine being a woman is like being on constant vacation. No pressures, no expectations, betas and manginas and white knights falling over themselves to pave the way for you... probably a pretty sweet deal. Compare this to men who have the constant tyrannical all seeing Eye of the feminine imperative upon them at all times.. judging, analyzing, ready to deprive men of pussy at a moment's notice. All men are running the rat race, eternally chasing that carrot on a stick that is pussy, and at the back of the treadmill is a mound of broken male bodies. Beta male victims of the dry cock inflicting Sauron that is woman.

PanderjitSingh_k · 2019-06-24T22:54:22+00:00

Simply because men are kinder, more generous, less superficial people all around.

Title	Why do you think men find attractive a larger pool of people?
Author	VirginPrideWorldWide
Upvotes	25
Comments	187
Date	June 24, 2019 4:16 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/c4qnph/why_do_you_think_men_find_attractive_a_larger/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-do-you-think-men-find-attractive-a-larger-pool.255143 https://theredarchive.com/post/255143

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