Why are so many women having trouble with the Dating scene?

Workaholico · 2019-03-22T05:17:50+00:00

Offer and demand mismatch

The market has a small offer of higher valued men and even less of a offer of higher valued men interested in relationships while women have a high demand of those.

On the other hand, there is a big offer of non higher valued men and a big chunk of those want a relationship. But their demand is minimal to unexistant.

Most women want the highest men available or nothing. So they chose nothing. Most men want a woman, but by the lack of offer, many have no choice but end up alone.

Did I make sense for you? Any questions?

DevilishRogue · 2019-03-22T09:26:16+00:00

Unrealistic standards. Too many women seem to imagine that a guy who is prepared to have a one night stand with them should also be prepared to date them without realising that guys who are able to have a one night stand with them have far better options for dating than them.

doctor_trucks · 2019-03-22T13:34:32+00:00

Human beings enjoy sitting around and complaining about things. It's a bonding experience. I sit around with my coworkers and complain about work, but none of us hate our jobs.

Women sit around and bitch about men. Men sit around and bitch about women. Teachers sit around and bitch about students. Students sit around and bitch about teachers.

None of these is indicative of any systemic problem. People just like to complain, and it's an easy topic of converstion.

GradualDecomp · 2019-03-22T05:25:36+00:00

Very few people in my circle are failing at dating. Just the common complaints of breakups and shitty dates.

The few women I know that are having serious trouble dating have issues holding them back. Extreme shyness, trauma, health problems, addiction, too many personal problems, demanding work schedules, being hung up on an ex, etc.

Just like MGTOW and similar forums, anyone complaining "where have all the good men/women gone?" are no good themselves. There's no shortage of either.

ontheavenue123 · 2019-03-22T10:57:38+00:00

I’m a woman and I’ve been single and dating for a couple of years since my last relationship ended. Dating is easy but I am very focused on finding a life partner and that is extremely difficult. My impression often is that men have such low standards for women and they make that known and that is such a turn off. What I mean is that more and more I get this sense that many men are looking for an attractive, fun, nice, decently smart woman... and that’s it. They ask me enough questions to check off those boxes and once those boxes are checked off thy don’t seem very interested in me as a person past that. I have been on SO many dates in which we will have a normal back and forth conversation for about 10 minutes and then the man stops asking me questions about myself and stops trying to get to know me and then talks and talks and talks about himself for the next hour or two, like he’s trying to sell himself.

I am not remotely interested in going on dates with someone who has told me minuscule details about themselves but who has not cared to ask me questions or get to know me beyond the surface level. It is extremely tough, IMO, to find men that fulfill all my boxes and who are interested in a woman as a partner and not just someone nice to make them feel or look good.

goldmedalflower · 2019-03-22T04:54:47+00:00

I doubt this is true for any normie 4+/10 female who puts themselves out there. To the few that do struggle, it's overwhelmingly related to them holding out for unrealistic standards, i.e. self-limiting

LivelyChartreuse · 2019-03-22T05:17:17+00:00

They aren't just looking to have sex (unlike men), they are looking for relationships. If they wanted cock they could fall on it. Connection and commitment are entirely different beasts to wrangle in terms of difficulty.

SavingsTraffic111 · 2019-03-22T07:31:36+00:00

That's because they're not looking just for sex, they're looking for relationships. And not just for relationships, but for relationships with men they find attractive (which is a very small minority of men). Your gf's friends feel that competition for men like these is too fierce. No doubt they could easily get boyfriends who are average, but they would rather stay single.

Jonmad17 · 2019-03-22T04:38:40+00:00

Combination of things

What is desirable to men in a female partner is a cripple to you IRL. Softness, innocence, agreeableness etc. Women are quite literally forced to become more masculine, men don't appreciate these values when assessing them for LTR, and women are confused and hurt by that.
Most men that are above a 6/10 can get casual sex, so they're getting casual sex.
Most men that are attractive, relationship oriented, etc are taken.

planejane · 2019-03-22T08:27:23+00:00

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goatismycopilot · 2019-03-22T10:58:18+00:00

I keep remembering that your GF wants to get pregnant , I am waiting for the OMG my GF is pregnant thread what do I do?

[deleted] · 2019-03-22T11:27:15+00:00

Well i can only speak for myself here.For me it's because i have pretty high standards in what i want in a man,but thh i got nothing much to offer back other than my credentials which men don't care about.Everyone i settle for less,i'm always stuck with low class,backward thinking men who only care about pussy period.People will encourage women to lower their standards but sometimes when you lower your standards it just not what you don't just click,once you as a person has elevated yourself,you tend to want someone higher or at the same level with you when it comes to all things about life.I've had to put up with shit from so many men and knowing they unattainable don't want me is just depressing, that I've just given up.

kandyapplez · 2019-03-22T05:25:07+00:00

its hard for young women who want relationships because young men don't approach dealing with the opposite sex with the goal of a relationship. they mostly are looking for casual sex and if a relationship springs from that great. women just want a relationship.

DesignerDebates · 2019-03-22T04:28:22+00:00

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ColdHardTruth2019 · 2019-03-22T15:56:10+00:00

The reason why so many women are having trouble dating is because the vast majority of them are extremely selfish, lazy, and don’t put much thought into how their thoughts and actions are affecting their lives. They only focus on what they are getting out of the men they are dating, they don’t consider the idea that they need to give too. They date like they are hiring a man for the position of boyfriend.

I don’t care what they say at the table, when no ones looking they aren’t dating the way they claim - at the end of the day it’s all about them. What people say, and what they do are two completely different things.

If they really wanted to be a in a relationship they would figure it out.

Dating only sucks when you aren’t putting any thought and realistic effort into it.

ThisIsJustATr1bute · 2019-03-22T04:24:42+00:00

Do you have more details about how these women are defining dating? That could mean anything from having serious partners to just downloading Tinder.

Jokengonzo · 2019-03-22T13:59:16+00:00

They are in the late 20’s earlier 30s

Physiologist21 · 2019-03-22T17:35:57+00:00

I've never met a woman who had troubles dating unless they were either incredibly unlikable or had an incredibly low sense of self awareness, ie. the types who despite have nothing to offer besides their looks (if that) expect to land some model doctor who bends over backwards for them.

shonenhikada · 2019-03-23T19:03:19+00:00

Women when young--->Aim for Chad and top 20% that have 50+ girls in same area wanting to be with them.

Women now late 20's and 30's---> Start giving lesser tier men a chance who more likely to commit for marriage and relationship after Chad has gotten married.

Women now late 30's and 40's---> Give average guys a chance who will likely commit to her a chance.

KikiYuyu · 2019-03-22T06:44:48+00:00

There's a lot more parts than just finding a willing guy. They gotta be attracted to each other, get along, feel a "spark", and want the same things for the relationship.

isweartoofuckingmuch · 2019-03-22T10:33:18+00:00

Standards too high while not offering anything in the relationship. So many girls want a hot guy who cares about them, gives them time, affection etc. At the same time they've not cooked an egg in their lives and are useless as a houseplant without the oxygen boost.

A high value man simply has nothing to gain from this relationship.

ColdHardTruth2019 · 2019-03-22T14:53:24+00:00

No one i know is having a tough time dating. You either want a boyfriend and get one, or you want to be single. Not hard.

throwaway94x · 2019-03-23T00:04:47+00:00

Attractive women date men who dont give a fuck about them. And the other men chase after those women, who don't give a fuck about them. And no one cares about ugly women except for sex sometimes if they are really desperate.

CatchPhraze · 2019-03-22T04:36:19+00:00

They are educated, put effort into their appearance and want a guy to be the same. Unfortunately men really do think just being themselves is attractive enough. The idea they should have to spend hours shopping for nice fitting clothes or style their hair or wax their eyebrows is beyond them. So women aren't willing to waste all that effort on someone not doing the same. Hence the problem.

Hungry_AF · 2019-03-22T05:39:18+00:00

Because all men are unfaithful scum whos "love" is 100% based on beauty/youth.

Sounds ike your girlfriend's friends are finally realizing it.

Sprach_McGrachan · 2019-03-22T08:09:11+00:00

So my Girlfriend’s friends came over so they could have girl time and drink wine. Well before I took off to catch a meal with some friends I caught pieces of the convo they were having and it alll seemed to revolve on how hard dating was for them and that they were giving up dating for a while. My sister has also mentioned how many of her gfs are checking out of dating. Why though what’s making it so hard?

Sounds like the makings of another Madea movie.

Sad_Virgin_Beta_Male · 2019-03-22T13:43:35+00:00

It's called hypergamy. Every foid wants Chad and only Chad. That's why so many women are single. They refuse to date their looksmatch

sternje · 2019-03-22T17:30:08+00:00

This is typical psychological self-protection. Believe me, if someone they found to be attractive and charming asked for their instagram/fb/whatsapp/phone# while in line waiting for a Starbucks, they'd immediately reverse course.

boomcheese44 · 2019-03-22T18:33:43+00:00

I hate this idea that everything in life should be easy, without any trouble or setback. Nothing in life is effortless. Finding a partner should be a hard thing. Most relationships or interactions with the opposite sex fails. Just because people choose to step back does not mean that there is some type of systematic problem.

HalfysReddit · 2019-03-22T20:13:33+00:00

Well OP you need to finish asking your question. Women are having trouble with what?

Most likely what they are having difficulty finding is commitment, and that's because they're human. The commitment struggle has been real for most of human history and in fact had to be tied to valuable property to incentivize it.

slavicgypsygirl · 2019-03-23T16:30:38+00:00

I date a lot & enjoy it so rdk

Tookthemethpill · 2019-03-25T18:11:09+00:00

Because guys learned we can just pump and dump you and move on to the next one without marrying.

Beta bux are learning to be beta fux now. Or just simply going MGTOW.

svalbard5 · 2019-03-26T15:56:24+00:00

Women have trouble with the dating scene because they have ridiculous standards.

Dating websites allow users to filter men based on various criteria -- race, age, religion, height, etc.

Most women check "6ft +". That's 8% of the total population and SIGNIFICANTLY less than 8% of the dating website membership. A guy who is 6+ and is on a dating website likely has issues.

So, if you are a woman who is only going out with 6ft + guys who can't manage a relationship, wtf do you think is going to happen?

Meanwhile, a 5'4" guy doesn't get any hits because he's filtered out. Could be the nicest guy in the world.

Women need to realize that as they age, they don't need to lower their standards, they need to abandon their standards completely. If you are 30+ and unmarried, you're in trouble. If you're 35+ and unmarried, you should be panicked. If you are 40+, you're done. Game over.

poppy_blu · 2019-03-22T10:30:20+00:00

Because millennial men are garbage

Kore624 · 2019-03-22T04:28:16+00:00

“Hook up culture”? Maybe the guys they’ve been interested in are more open and upfront about just wanting casual sex. Or maybe they’re just having bad luck and don’t have anything in common with the people they’re seeing

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vanBeethovenLudwig · 2019-03-22T06:03:20+00:00

Did they say the reasons why they are giving up?

Either they're having trouble because of their own vulnerability issues, or they're extremely picky about their selection.

DXBrigade · 2019-03-22T08:36:11+00:00

Because you are a woman doesn't mean that you have it easy when it comes to dating. Everyone struggles.

RickWilsonsBuck · 2019-03-22T13:09:47+00:00

How old are they

Title	Why are so many women having trouble with the Dating scene?
Author	Jokengonzo
Upvotes	56
Comments	460
Date	March 22, 2019 4:22 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/b40l40/why_are_so_many_women_having_trouble_with_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-are-so-many-women-having-trouble-with-the.256655 https://theredarchive.com/post/256655