A month ago, my wife gave birth to a black baby girl. We're both white, so she was forced to admit that the child was a result of a one night stand last year.
I've started divorce proceedings, although we're still living together for now. Between our two boys(aged 2 and 4, I've had paternity tests for them and they came back positive), her infant daughter and her having lost her job due to COVID, living together as amicably as possible until the divorce is settled is an unfortunate necessity.
Naturally I have no ill will towards the baby, and I've been disgusted by some of the comments I've heard from family members, friends, coworkers and others, all who seem to be fixated on the racial angle of this. As if the most salient part of this isn't that my wife cheated, but that she cheated with a BLACK man and that the baby is BLACK.
What really worries me is that my two sons might pick up on these narratives. They're too young to really understand what's happening now, but I'm worried that as they grow to understand the situation that they might grow to resent their half-sister for "breaking up their parents marriage". And worse that their resentment might express itself in a racist fashion, under the influence of the aforementioned racist narratives.
Any thoughts on how I should try to influence my son's away from that perspective? It probably doesn't help that we live in a suburb with very few black people and their half-sister is really the only black person my children know.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (3 children) | Copy Link
Gentlemen,
We want to remind you to keep your focus on the woman in display. We are getting a lot of comments about the man being a pushover, a cuck, a weakling etc. We are also getting a lot of comments about her choice of skin color. Remember that neither matters and is not the focus of the topic.
About blaming the husband: Women always want to be treated as adults when it suits them and as children when it suits them. While it is wrong of the husband to treat a grown adult woman (and a lying, cheating one at that) like a child, what she did is far worse and deserves more condemnation. By blaming the husband for being weak, you are making it ok for her to be manipulative. Is that what you want? Don't treat women like kids. They are adults and are responsible for every choice they make. Hold them responsible. Just because societies and governments do not want to does not mean you should not.
About her choice of skin color: I find it amusing that some people are fixating on who she chose to cheat with rather than focusing on the cheating itself. Would you have been fine if she fucked a white guy? Or someone who resembles you? Or your brother? Or your twin?
AWALT. No woman of any race or color is exempt. She will cheat with desirable men of all races and all colors, if she is given the right opportunities and incentives. If you are under the delusion that women of your group/ color/ race is any different, read up on the war brides dynamic, shut the fuck up and read the sidebar, starting with Rule 1 and the embedded post there. You are not ready to contribute yet. Understand that men in-fighting about what color she goes for/ what race she prefers is a diversion. It does not matter what race she goes for. What matters is that she is lying, cheating whore.
As u/kevin32 pointed out, we only allow civil, constructive comments that focus on the shitty dating strategies of women, their consequences and how to avoid such women. We do not care if you think your woman/ women of your race/ women of your color are unicorns. Stick to the rules. Concentrate on what is important. If you don't, we will kick you out. Read up on the links kevin has shared and read the embedded post in Rule 1. If you don't want to or if you are lazy, leave.
[–]Honest_SolutionSr. Toxically Masculine Care Boi383 points384 points385 points (94 children) | Copy Link
I’m sure it’s somehow the husbands fault that she cheated on him with Tyrone.
[–]27KHHVJr. Hamster Analyst209 points210 points211 points (19 children) | Copy Link
Reposting my comment here based on the advice of a mod, due to deleted post
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nothing but a cheating whore, going for bad boy Tyrone excitement and getting pregnant from it. The real racists are the women, because they usually don't go for different race men for pure preference or interest, but for excitement.
Why else do stereotypes about men exists? Whether its Caucasian, Black, Asian, Middle Eastern....etc.
Why do indian and asian women gold-dig/chase white men? Because racism, power, privilege, Caucasian fetishization and status symbol; not because they genuinely like the guy. Same thing with Caucasian women chasing Black or different men other than Caucasian men, because excitement.
Notice how they mostly go for the bad boys too. Do they go for the nice respectable Black man who's only difference is his skin color? no. The same applies to other types of race fetishization that happens.
[–]IdrinkandIknowXL73 points74 points75 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Let’s just say that any woman who’s a 7 and above will always go for the bad boy. Once reality hits they go for the Beta cuck to pay their bills since 1/2 of them are too stupid to balance a checkbook and figure out what 25% interest on a CC means.
[–]RRFdevSr. Hamster Analyst42 points43 points44 points (16 children) | Copy Link
Bam, good answer.
I have heard some whites who say they dig Muslim (Middle-Eastern Asian) men, but in a similar fashion they don't actually go for the pious, humble, chaste, politely spoken Muslim men, but actually go for the ISIS recruit potential thugs, criminals, ghetto dwellers, or on the opposite end of the spectrum Shieks and Sharifs who just wear their white robes for show and are depraved and corrupt inside using their wealth to indulge in vice and debauchery.
[–]27KHHVJr. Hamster Analyst27 points28 points29 points (8 children) | Copy Link
Ah, very well observed fact.
If anyone ever wondered why some women would travel from their safe 1st western world to end up being a graped, beaten 3rd world ISIS infidel trophy "wife"; there's your answer.
Fuck ISIS.
As for the men joining those terrorist causes....well the reasons are more complex, and generally stupid, usually has to do with feeling a lack of manhood or needing to "prove themselves".
[–]Bing_Bang_Bam16 points17 points18 points (2 children) | Copy Link
West is the best
[–]CentralAdminJr. Hamster Analyst1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
East side is da best!
[–]BluepillProfessorMRP Mod1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Get here and we’ll do the rest.
Yes it’s the end.
My only friend the end.
[–]Rick_OShay110 points11 points12 points (4 children) | Copy Link
With wealthy Muslim men permitted to marry up to 4 wives, I imagine there is surplus of young males with no hope of a woman of their own, and so they are willing to sacrifice themselves to their moon-god in exchange for the promise of a celestial harem in the afterlife.
[–]27KHHVJr. Hamster Analyst4 points5 points6 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Ah yes, the imaginary 72 virgins (probably other men like them) and 1 goat.
This is why i'm atheist and left that crazy shit behind. You don't get to choose what you're born into, but you can choose how your life turns out.
Also the eastern women have the most narcissistic princess complex. With a side of prudish religion to boot. They'll work you into the grave, and that's before you get access to the holy/hairy/who knows what it looks like "poon".
[–]Rick_OShay12 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
You were once a Muslim?
> Also the eastern women have the most narcissistic princess complex.
You talking about Middle Eastern women, or who? "Eastern" is rather vague.
[–]27KHHVJr. Hamster Analyst2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Was born into it, but i rejected it from an early age.
Also, correct, middle east women. Don't really want to get too specific for anonymity's sake lol
[–]Rick_OShay13 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
In fairness, the Middle East isn't small, so specifically mentioning them won't bite you.
[–]RunawayGrainTRP Endorsed12 points13 points14 points (2 children) | Copy Link
So at one point I dated a girl who was half Palestinian and half French. One of the things she said haunted her was seeing a woman getting stoned to death, and some random outbreaks of violence, such as a local group trying to incite the Israelis by shooting out of the windows in her school.
We both knew a girl who decided to marry a guy from southeast Asia that she met in college. So this girl goes on a screed about how bad the U.S. is, how horrid it is to women, etc. I was present when the Palestinian girl called her a ret*rd to her face. So the mutual acquaintance married and moved back to this guys home country. In the process, she renounced her U.S. citizenship.
The next Christmas this girl was back, ostensibly on a tourist visa. It was nonstop bitching about how corrupt everything is there. She's a blonde haired blue eyed white girl, so apparently everyone assumes she's rich, and everyone demands a bribe to get things done. Also, the climate, the rain, and actually seeing throngs of destitute people on the streets for the first time.
At any rate, she didn't make the flight back home. I should probably ask around and find out where she wound up, as I assume she got deported.
[–]DangZagnutMGTOW Man of Mystery5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Yeah you give up that US citizenship. To embrace what I don't know.
But, the U.S. tends to allows these idiots back.
[–]mustangfrankHamster Padawan #692 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I worked in Saudi Arabia many years ago. I injured my finger, so I went to the nurse(male) to have it cleaned up and bandaged. There was a Saudi worker in the room with me. I looked at him, and I said what are you in her for? Because he didn't look hurt. And he was not. He was getting a medical exam for his marriage. But he had a wedding ring on. He said this was going to be his second wife. I said, why would you want more than one? He said it was like eating rice. You get tired of eating the same flavor. What can I say?
[–]Rick_OShay1-1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
Don't use "Muslims", say "Middle-Easterners".
I've had it up to my neck with people who attack so-called "Islamophobia" by pretending that "Islam is a race", when it's not.
[–]BarthoOkkebutje0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Muslims in the middle east have been pretty busy equating the two...
[–]Rick_OShay10 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I know. They are copying the Leftists' tactic of creating a fake victim-hood for themselves, the REAL aggressors.
[–]Eden_Company11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
That logic is right. But this has always historically been true. Go for power and fun.
[–]neoj888871 points72 points73 points (14 children) | Copy Link
In the update he said he was seriously considering adopting the child while still being firm about divorcing his wife. Wtf is wrong with people?
[–]MR_COOL_ICE_49 points50 points51 points (11 children) | Copy Link
Classic case of trying to be the "bigger man". He would never stoop down to her level so in order to get back at her he's gonna adopt the kid.
Worst idea ever. I hope for his sake he doesn't
[–]neoj888815 points16 points17 points (5 children) | Copy Link
I mean, if he wants to be a father figure to the child then whatever, but to legally tie himself to another persons child who isn’t his own right before he’s about to divorce her is crazy self destructive.
[–]Rick_OShay1-2 points-1 points0 points (4 children) | Copy Link
Think of it this way, he would be saving an innocent person's life from the woman and her destructive choices.
[–]neoj88884 points5 points6 points (3 children) | Copy Link
No, he’d just be putting himself on the hook for child support for a child that isn’t his. I’m all for him giving the child a good male role model or whatever you want to call it. I’m with you there. But it’s insane to suggest that he should tie himself legally to the child in this situation.
[–]Rick_OShay1-2 points-1 points0 points (2 children) | Copy Link
I am not talking about him sharing the child from her, but stealing it from her, the way many women steal their husband's children.
[–]redartist0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
What planet are you from that men can get custody over children that are not even theirs at will?
[–]Rick_OShay10 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
It's not impossible; you just have to know the right lawyer. And take advantage of the wife's ignorance.
[–]Throwaway_acctz0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
If anything, him having anything to do with the spawn of another man and his wife is the complete opposite of 'getting back at her'.
He should have nothing to do with the bastard.
[–]Rick_OShay1-3 points-2 points-1 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Think of it this way, he would be saving an innocent person's life from the woman and her destructive choices.
[–]MR_COOL_ICE_1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I understand that logic. But if he adopts this kid, who looks nothing like him, he would have to deal with a lifetime of explaining to people his situation. Think about new relationships, coworkers, new friends, all of those relationships would be strained.
[–]Rick_OShay10 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
It's easy; just say that she's adopted.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 33 points34 points35 points (0 children) | Copy Link
He's lost and confused because his whole world came crashing down. He's not thinking clearly.
Be mindful of rule 1.
[–]redartist0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
"The only thing a martyr searches for is a sword to fall on."
Whatever sympathy I had for the man evaporated after he vocalized his desire to adopt.
[–][deleted] (36 children) | Copy Link
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[–]hewhoisnotyou[🍰] 39 points40 points41 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Great for her... Free housing, living support and with the divorce done nothing stops her from fucking around while living off of his money.
Lol this guy should visit a doctor. Looks to me like he's got himself a parasite.
[+][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]SevereKnowledge13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This guy's story reminds me of the "You need to start asking questions, Dave" meme which is pretty funny. Not so much in real life. https://pics.onsizzle.com/you-need-to-start-asking-questions-dave-hes-right-dave-4714737.png
[–]_KNZ_8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
That's just fucking sad to read.
[–]IdrinkandIknowXL8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I am gonna say this story is made up. It reads like a cheap thriller.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[M] 1 point2 points3 points (11 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole1 point2 points3 points (9 children) | Copy Link
Haha, you're beating me to all of them! Too fast for me.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla2 points3 points4 points (8 children) | Copy Link
It's good to be first for once. That said, there is plenty to go around.
[–]kevin32Reddit's Ambassador for NiceGuys™[S] 4 points5 points6 points (6 children) | Copy Link
u/moorekom, looks like we're getting more rule 1 infractions than anything. Would you sticky a comment about this as well as the race element (or point to my comment)? Thanks.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Done.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
Will do. I didn't want to remove your comment earlier.
[–]kevin32Reddit's Ambassador for NiceGuys™[S] 3 points4 points5 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Thank you. If the comments are getting out of hand for a particular post, it's a good idea to ask the mod of the sticky to include a comment about the rule-breaking. If he's not responding in a timely manner, then replace the sticky with a reminder of the rules. He can resticky his comment later.
cc: u/goodmansaysfuckyou, u/loneliness-inc, u/Typo-MAGAshiv
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole-1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
I found a few.
[–]Rick_OShay10 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
What did the story say?
[–]poloppoyopEasily triggered retard33 points34 points35 points (1 child) | Copy Link
And that's how you arrive unprepared with no plan before a judge and see your wife with a lawyer and a ton of documents attesting how you're a shitty father but still a good breadwinner.
He's gonna have to find a new home for himself, he can forget about his kids but he sure will have to pay her to "take care" of them and the house.
[–]Rick_OShay17 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Sad how even judges fail to see that self-contradiction.
[–]QuestionThemAlways21 points22 points23 points (0 children) | Copy Link
he's beyond fucked.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[M] 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–][deleted] (7 children) | Copy Link
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[–]QuestionThemAlways44 points45 points46 points (5 children) | Copy Link
to be devils advocate, the man is probably not thinking clearly, he is broken.
I can't imagine being excited for a new little one and right there in the delivery room coming to the realization that it's not mine.
and not only that, but that he wasn't good enough and that the life they built together is done and destroyed. it's a lot for a man to go through. I've seen it happen to an acquaintance. the guy mostly stares into space now. doesn't talk like he used to. is just... broken.
The guy needs to disappear for a while. go live with a friend or family for a few weeks so he can get his thoughts in order. his comments right now sound like he's trying to hold onto some semblance of normalcy and is lost in what to do.
poor chap is in the middle of an identity crisis. no longer a husband, no longer the head of the household, no longer the decision maker, and is struggling with what comes next.
as far as nutless, meh, maybe. but then again even will smith's wife cheated. the guy i mentioned above was a great guy, leader, provider, but the woman just got bored with being the house wife. got on facebook and would see her single friends out having a good time and ended up cheating.
[–]warlocc_Jr. Hamster Analyst24 points25 points26 points (1 child) | Copy Link
This bears highlighting. I've seen that condition. Like zombies, empty bodies just following the routine because it's all they have left.
It's basically death. In some ways, worse than death.
It's why I laugh when I hear someone say women are in any way disadvantaged. Nobody with the ability to do that to men is disadvantaged.
[–]Rick_OShay17 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Sadly, the people who NEED to read things like this the most are the only ones who aren't reading it.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 12 points13 points14 points (0 children) | Copy Link
That's not considered being devil's advocate here; it's considered being compassionate to your fellow man who is still plugged in to the gynocentric matrix as we all once were. Hopefully he unplugs.
Well done.
[–]TheOneTrueDonuteater1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Sounds a lot like PTSD. That implication on it's own is pretty scary.
[–]Rick_OShay11 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Reminds me of my husky after his mate died.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]polakfuryInvested heavily in Questions pre-200817 points18 points19 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Dude is crazy and setting himself up to getting wrecked in court unless he jumps on the case first.
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla[M] 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]3HardWaySr. Hamster Analyst53 points54 points55 points (12 children) | Copy Link
I feel bad for the guy. Plenty of people are commenting either on the nobleness of his approach or on how weak and spineless he is. But right now, nothing has begun. And he is trapped. He has the option to get divorced or stay with her.
It's easy to talk about the future before it has even started. How many years will he be able to endure?
[–]dayone_2727 points28 points29 points (11 children) | Copy Link
There is a third way. Ghost the hell out of there. Leave the country and take money out via crypto. Assume a new identity. Let the government responsible for allowing this degeneracy take care of the woman and children both legitimate and illegitimate.
[–]__ApexPredditor__20 points21 points22 points (8 children) | Copy Link
He has kids.
[–]DextroShade24 points25 points26 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Not when the family courts is through with him he won't.
[–]mustangfrankHamster Padawan #692 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
That is true, buddy.
[–]dayone_276 points7 points8 points (2 children) | Copy Link
While he can’t be there physically for his children, he can still send money to the mom, then the kids directly when they are older. Not child support mandated but on his own terms.
[–]__ApexPredditor__2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I think you misunderstand my point. Most fathers prefer to be involved in the lives of their children. Sure, he could flee to Poland or wherever and live off cryptocurrency and maybe even escape chld support. But most dads wouldn't want to do that.
I do think he's an idiot for accepting/bonding with the one kid that isn't his, but most human beings with a heart don't want to abandon their own kids.
[–]dayone_272 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I understand some men prefer to live in a subservient manner in order to be involved in their children’s lives. I’m not saying it’s easy to ghost your kids but only that it’s an option for a man who wants dignity, he’ll have to put himself first for a while. As I said there are ways of staying involved from afar, sending money and when the children are older, forming a relationship with them directly. You’ll have to be on the colder side and prepared to even have your kids swear you off if you choose this path, but the option is there. A lot of men just breakdown completely by trying to stay involved when they are not wanted, just their money. Better to leave that situation.
[–]sthlmtrdr5 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Gangbangers, criminals and drug dealers also got kids.
I do not live in the US so I have no insight how it work over there. Do criminals and gangbangers pay child support if they become a father? are they put in jail because they don't pay to the mother? thinking most of these don't give a shit and just abandon their kids.
[–]__ApexPredditor__4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
If the government can find you and link you to being the child's father, you're gonna get hit with child support obligations. Doesn't matter who you are, priest or gangster. If you don't pay, you're going to face some very nasty consequences including jail time.
There are some variations from one state to the next, but generally payment obligations are subjectively based on how much you can afford, not objectively how much is necessary to support the child. It's around 20% of your income per child (although if you have 3 or more children, there is a reduction to cap the total support amount at 50% of your total, in recognition of the fact that you need to be able to eat and pay rent.)
So if you are a gangster in prison making $10 per month for prison wages, your child support might be set at $2 per month. If you are a CEO making millions of dollars a year, you might pay $100k/month. The court looks at your income tax returns to determine what your income is. So if your income is illegal because you are a drug dealing thug and you're not reporting any of it, then yes you might be able to evade it somewhat.
[–]Lorelei_Valfreyja0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Of course, this only applies if you're the father.
My daughter's deadbeat mom is just north of $30,000 in child support arrears.
She's not spent a single night in jail since the order went into effect in 2009.
[–]sthlmtrdr6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Always protect and be secret of your money before entering a co-habitation relationship. Crypto is great as one may keep ones money regardless what happens and no one knows about it and can take it away from you.
Pretend to everyone around you that you got no money and are broke.
[–]minitntman1-1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
He is not going to go to the convenience store for cigs.
[–]huzaa29 points30 points31 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Remember women never take responsibility. If you cannot get girls it's your problem, because you are ugly, smell bad, boring, etc. If you cheat on a girl you are a horrible human being. These of course probably are true.
But, if a woman cannot get a boyfriend, it's because men are just boys and can't settle, can't see her awesomeness. If a woman cheat it's because the husband was bad to her, treated her poorly, or forgot about her, had a small dick or just was boring.
Everything is always men's fault.
[–]EmervilaSpinning Dis On The Fritz24 points25 points26 points (6 children) | Copy Link
you know he is a good husband and father bc it was a one-night stand. There was not side relationship nor a follow up at all, usually women justify by saying they needed emotional support yada yada, you don't get anything emotional or sentimental in a ONS. She just wanted to go black
[–]magicmikefx86 points87 points88 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Nah she lied. And got away with the lie. She was super hopeful the baby would not be Black. Then she went to plan b which was a one night stand. The reality was far different. I think the concept is refered as trickle truth.
[–]QuestionThemAlways43 points44 points45 points (1 child) | Copy Link
if she did it once, she's been doing it for a while or continued it after.
maybe once she got preggers she may have gotten spooked, but even then, she probably continued the relationship for as long as she could.
[–]Uhtred_McUhtredsonSmells like Harvey Weinsteins Fingers33 points34 points35 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This is just the one time she got caught. In the worst possible way.
[–]redartist0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
"you know he is a good husband and father bc it was a one-night stand"
That he knows of.
Come on man, we can't afford to be as naive as the protagonist of this story.
[–]EmervilaSpinning Dis On The Fritz0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Women will always justify cheating with anything and everything they can but she didn't. She didn't have a relationship or anything "stable" sure we know just this far but her reaction shows she had nothing to throw at him therefore he was clean = good. Women will never lose any single chance to trash talk men even more when they need to defend or make a stand
[–]appropriate-username-5 points-4 points-3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Nothing in the post suggests this.
[–]theDukesofSwagger349 points350 points351 points (56 children) | Copy Link
Check out his update, he’s being way too nice to his whore of a wife. Says he’s definitely going to divorce her but is considering adopting the baby cause he’s bonded with it.
God help this man
[–]warlocc_Jr. Hamster Analyst175 points176 points177 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, I saw that too. The courts are going to destroy him.
[–]noobie107Koalaty man107 points108 points109 points (6 children) | Copy Link
this is the poison of reddit. you just know R/cuckhold and R/FemaleDatingStrategy is all up in that thread influencing the guy
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 28 points29 points30 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Remove the direct links to those cesspool subreddits, and I'll reapprove your comment.
[–]afkb39sdfbHas an eye for Cherry Pie20 points21 points22 points (1 child) | Copy Link
If you put a capital R it won't make a link.
/R/gayboybottoms
See! No link. Let offenders know.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole16 points17 points18 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Well, that's one method...
[–]MishMiassh18 points19 points20 points (1 child) | Copy Link
They "guy" is probably just some more larping, trying to influence culture by shoving the overton window into stupid space.
[–][deleted] 17 points18 points19 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly. The powers that be are well aware of the power of propaganda and "meme magic" by now. It's a well studied field. These types of posts have a certain uncanny valley feeling to them
[–]Rick_OShay11 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Wait, are you saying that the OP's story is in those reddits?
[–]Abcde201873 points74 points75 points (17 children) | Copy Link
The sad part is that it’s not the babies fault. The child shouldn’t be punished for the sins of the mother.
The mother however shouldn’t get shit in the divorce... you made your bed
[+][deleted] (15 children) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]TheOneTrueDonuteater12 points13 points14 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep. Bill the genetic father.
[–]Rick_OShay1-1 points0 points1 point (13 children) | Copy Link
Think of it this way, he would be saving an innocent person's life from the woman and her destructive choices.
[–]A1C_Umbreon[🍰] 4 points5 points6 points (12 children) | Copy Link
That's his whore wife's fault. It is unfortunate for the kid. That doesn't change the fact that actions have consequences and the responsibility does not fall on him. He didn't cheat. He didn't have a child with another woman. She did, and had a child with another man. She fucked not only another man, but metaphorically fucked her husband, her marriage and her children.
This man, if he wants his kids not to hold the bastard kid accountable, needs to make it known to them in no uncertain terms it is not the baby's fault for ruining the marriage, but the mother's.
Is it a shitty, and hard thing to do? Yes, but men are the ones who build and change the world by being able to make those shitty and hard decisions.
[–]Rick_OShay1-1 points0 points1 point (11 children) | Copy Link
Okay? You didn't really reply to what I said; I'm suggesting that he STEAL the child from the woman. It would save the child from having a fucked up life thanks to her mother. Children from single moms almost NEVER turn out well.
[–]Inhuman-DH4 points5 points6 points (3 children) | Copy Link
So you want him to essentially enable her atrocious behaviour by cleaning up her mess? She can face the consequences, one of those (potentially) being her daughter resenting her for being a cheater. Imagine being in his shoes and following your advice, only to be constantly reminded of why his family is broken up every time he looks at her.
[–]Rick_OShay1-1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
Society has already enabled her.
I am suggesting that he kills multiple birds with one stone, and one bird would be him making her SUFFER by taking FULL custody of the children, including the bastard, and denying her getting to see them.
The second bird would be saving the innocent bastard from having a fucked up childhood. Can you imagine what a mess that poor little girl is going to end up becoming thanks to her mom?
[–]Inhuman-DH0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Society has already enabled her, but him raising the kid is just making it even worse.
I think you overestimate the power a male has in the court system. If the mother wanted, she would probably be granted full custody any day before they would provide it to the father.
And lastly, sure, it's noble to raise the kid, but that is a HUGE commitment, and not one that he owes. If she was a child from her previous relationship and he was fine with it, then okay. But this is a much different scenario. We can agree to disagree, though.
[–]Rick_OShay10 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
It's a heluva lot cheaper than paying child support, and less insulting.
[–]A1C_Umbreon[🍰] 2 points3 points4 points (6 children) | Copy Link
No. That is stupid.
[–]422522521 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Immensely, atrociously stupid, it's the kind of thing that in the moment feels good and righteous, and you spend decades dealing with the fallout. You have no relation to that kid, everyone who knows the story will be watching for any sign of you molesting it, because there's no reason a guy would take care of someone elses problems unless he was evil.
Tons of scrutiny, tons of cost. No thanks, even if the kid is "better off with me". I can't take care of every drowning person in this damn ocean, I can barely tread enough water myself and two kids.
His feelings aren't bad though, they may have been more appropriate in a more righteous era. Now, with the level of anti-male legislation and nightmarish child support setups, there's a fair chance even if he adopted it it would be pulled back to the mother and now he wouldn't have saved anything, he'd just be paying child support for some other guy.
[–]Rick_OShay1-1 points0 points1 point (4 children) | Copy Link
It would save a life, and make the ex-wife suffer; killing two birds with one stone.
[–]A1C_Umbreon[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
It'd land him in prison.
[–]Rick_OShay10 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
What I'm suggesting is not illegal.
[–]mustangfrankHamster Padawan #691 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I knew a man who was in the Army. He went to Iraq for 12 months. 3 months into his tour, he gets a notification that is congratulating him on his future addition to his family. Someone at the base did him a favor and he tells if CO. The CO starts proceedings for a divorce when the man returns. He gets back, and sure enough it is biracial. He is white and so too, is his wife.
Men get treated differently under the UCMJ. He got to keep his money he put in savings and what ever in a pension, all the assets. She got no alimony or child support or medical. She left with the kid. That is all she got.
BTW He knew of MGTOW Other men told him of it. MGTOW does not recruit, they watch men walk through the door way.
[–]Uhtred_McUhtredsonSmells like Harvey Weinsteins Fingers71 points72 points73 points (4 children) | Copy Link
They’re still living together. The dude is already making excuses for his wife, as in blaming it on her depression and telling friends and family to not judge her.
Within 3 months of continuing to live together he will “man up,” cancel the divorce, adopt the baby and go on like nothing ever happened.
[–]A_Dull_Vice44 points45 points46 points (3 children) | Copy Link
He won't just "man up", he'll be proud about it, and get off on calling people out for their crime of "racism" for noticing that the kid is clearly not his.
[–]MrTakis29 points30 points31 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep. He was already whinging in his first post about not wanting people to be "racist" towards his wife's bastard daughter
[–]RealMcGonzoJr. Hamster Analyst15 points16 points17 points (0 children) | Copy Link
And he'll get a couple more Tyrone Juniors for his efforts.
[–]MishMiassh9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Well, not like there are many outlets to still feel any kind of pride after being cuckholded.
Off to the cognitive dissonence, only way to be happy in staying in those circumstances is basically by going insane and embracing it I guess.
[–]__ApexPredditor__39 points40 points41 points (0 children) | Copy Link
"IvE bOnDeD wItH tHe BaBy"
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: This does not get any easier as the child gets older. In fact, the more time you spend with the child, the harder it gets to walk to away.
If someone wants to be a supercuck and raise somebody else's kid, be my guest. But don't deceive yourself that you need to just stick around "while the child is young" or "until the mother gets back on her feet." The first moment you realize a child is not yours needs to be the first moment you bail.
SOURCE: When my son was 4 years old I discovered that my then-wife had cheated with numerous men around the time she got pregnant. Turns out he was mine after all (DNA confirmed) but after 4 years of raising him as my own it woulda been near impossible to walk away from the lil fella.
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[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]RealMcGonzoJr. Hamster Analyst10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Even the original post is too forgiving, IMO. Sounds to me like the wench wins points because she squeezed out a black kid. Guy is afraid to appear both racist and misogynistic. And that's a valid fear in our current environment.
[–]DextroShade10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
He's going to be paying child support for that kid, and he will have brought that on himself.
[–]escailer5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I didn’t get the “being nice” vibe from his post that much. I read it as a combination of being quite objective to the facts for the purpose of the post combined with him wanting to be fully exited from the situation with a minimum of emotional conflict until everything is done. Kind of a biding time stance.
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[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]Rick_OShay1-2 points-1 points0 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Think of it this way, he would be saving an innocent person's life from the woman and her destructive choices.
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[–]theDukesofSwagger7 points8 points9 points (11 children) | Copy Link
Are you serious?
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[–]theDukesofSwagger12 points13 points14 points (9 children) | Copy Link
What are you smoking? Cause it’s fucking with your head.
It’s not his kid.
He already has 2 kids that he will be paying child support for 18 years if he doesn’t get 50/50 custody.
If he thinks he can handle it monetarily, then he is free to do whatever he wants. However, I guarantee that in a couple of years he’ll regret the decision.
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[–]theDukesofSwagger7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Nope. There’s nothing wrong with adopting in general. But this case is different. He’s taking on another mans kid. A man....THAT FUCKED HIS WIFE. That’s called cuckoldry. I can’t imagine trying to explain that one to people:
Stranger: “Where did you adopt your kid from?”
As she’s clearly black
Cucked OP: ”Oh no, she’s my wife’s boyfriend’s”
He’s also (hopefully) proceeding with divorcing his wife so it’s not like he’s going to be around the child all the time. Even if he was, what’s the point in becoming legally bound to the child?
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla3 points4 points5 points (4 children) | Copy Link
Half sister. I can think of two very good reasons.
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[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla4 points5 points6 points (2 children) | Copy Link
No. They are punishing the wife. She fucked over the kid. Don't lay that blame on the people. She made that choice. She made the choice to not only cheat, she made the choice to lie to him, manipulate him for months and to potentially fuck up the future of her own kid for her own selfishness.
That presupposes that the "right" thing and the default thing to do is to bail out the kid for the bad choices of his mother. Sure, the kid did nothing wrong. Her mother did her wrong. You cannot expect other people to bail out her mother. The kid is the woman's responsibility. She decided to have that kid and any responsibility the husband might have had went out the window when she cheated on him and lied to him.
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[–]theDukesofSwagger7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
He isn’t in a normal state of mind at the moment and thinks this is the right thing to do. I assume he feels guilty for what he thinks is abandonment in his eyes, but it isn’t. Once the cuteness and the innocence wears off he’ll realize that he’s responsible for the product of his wife’s infidelity.
Nothing in this situation is this mans fault and he shouldn’t feel the need to “fix” anything.
As countless others have commented on this post: This all could’ve been avoided if the wife didn’t fuck around. She ruined ALL of it.
[–]CuriousIncel2219 points220 points221 points (9 children) | Copy Link
Cheating is so normalized in our culture that the race of the man she cheated with was a bigger scandal than the fact that she cheated.
Jordan Peterson said
Guess cheating has become the norm now. When a woman gets caught cucking a man, the system be like, gg do better next time.
[–]Mundane_Worldliness7Jr. Hamster Analyst68 points69 points70 points (2 children) | Copy Link
I agree, that focusing on race kind of obscures the real issue. For all we know, this isn’t even her first affair, it’s her conduct which is the issue.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole32 points33 points34 points (0 children) | Copy Link
It likely isn't, and I'd bet a day's wages that she lied about it being a one night stand.
[–]YuhBoiKenzo0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
that happens alot on this site I have a hard time believing it's not intentional. Every time a situation like this or any other challenges the current narrative the entire thread is blocked up with stupid dead memes and talking about literally anything other then the post itself.
[–]valenin40 points41 points42 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Remember Hollywood Squares? Late at night you can catch reruns of it from 1983, when it was part of the Match Game Hollywood Squares Hour.
The other night, one of the celebrities was given a question like: According to a poll published in Cosmopolitan magazine, have more women been unfaithful to their husbands, or do most women honor their marriage vows?
The male celebrity almost immediately said they honored their vows. The 8/9 male celebrity board agreed.
There was a weird stillness among them when it was revealed that he was wrong. In 1983, most polled women admitted to having cheated on their husbands.
[–]ZealousMathsJr. Hamster Analyst1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Well its among the women willing to respond to the poll for hollywood. So when it comes to it, vanity hound women are whores among whores.
[–]valenin0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Match Game didn’t run the polls themselves. They used to have a research team that looked at studies and polls published by other people. The standard question format included the source, something like, ‘According to Home and Garden magazine, what should you put in your garden to discourage slugs? Is it X, or Y?’ or ‘A survey recently published by the CDC revealed that more than 40% of people have done this. Did they do X, or Y?’
Unfortunately I don’t remember the source for that particular question, but my point is that it wasn’t ‘we got an intern to ask a bunch of aspiring actresses in Hollywood’.
[–]Uhtred_McUhtredsonSmells like Harvey Weinsteins Fingers33 points34 points35 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Peterson is even more based than I remember.
One of the reasons I never got married was when I was younger I had several seemingly happily married women try to sleep with me and my friends that it practically gave me PTSD.
[–]Porphyrogennetos33 points34 points35 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This is the crux of why men are checking out in my opinion.
Women have no agency. In that environment, there is no recourse for a man. The only winning move is to not play the game.
[–]afkb39sdfbHas an eye for Cherry Pie6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
At 36 I've been the side action for a few married women, can confirm.
[–]warlocc_Jr. Hamster Analyst165 points166 points167 points (12 children) | Copy Link
This woman's actions broke up a marriage, broke up a home, hurt her children, gave racists fuel to behave the way they do, makes women and black men look bad, and there are still comments telling him to just accept it and raise the baby.
It really is a clown world.
[–]4225225228 points29 points30 points (6 children) | Copy Link
When I lived in the poor areas of south america I used to balk at the "savagery" when they would say things like "oh, my daughter had a baby with some foreign guy so it died in its sleep. Lucky for her, eh? Everything's back to normal! Ha!" It's horrifying, but in a way, honest in nature. It's like the base form of humanity, the one we're always trying to paste over. It's irritating how we're picking and choosing, like we'll go back to caveman polybreeding, because that's fun and empowering, but grog the cave man can't just leave the nest if he doesn't like it there.
Stuff like this makes me wonder how much of our value system is actually based on kindness or manufactured guilt. Are we really that much better if we so often work against our own self-interests? It's really seeming like 'good person' is just the carrot that social predators dangle in front of us to manipulate us into working against our health and happiness.
[–]CoronaFatBoi8 points9 points10 points (3 children) | Copy Link
We invented religion for that purpose.
[–]Chgralac732 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
but what if 99% of hell is filled with women? and only 1% of heaven are women?
that would explain so much :P
[–]redartist0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
That one's easy: Your 72 virgins will be men.
[–]422522521 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Why else would they hit religions (mostly christianity) so hard with their new age, fem-centered bullshit? Women are the consumers and they're much easier to manipulate, as long as they show up the men will follow. Now we have lesbian priests telling us that heaven's going to have a shortage of men because they're so terrible.
I've always doubted that because intent and inner discipline seems like the greater portion of goodness. Most of teh church girls I've been with have only been going along with it out of a hostage like cultural membership. They didn't want shame from their friends and family, so they play along and feign piety.
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[–]Reddit-Book-Bot2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Beep. Boop. I'm a robot. Here's a copy of
Beyond Good And Evil
Was I a good bot? | info | More Books
[–]huzaa13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Even if a guy knew she was married it's absolutely not his responsibility. It's not his wife, not his marriage. He took the chance and that's all.
The worst thing is that he wasn't wearing protection. He might just gave STDs to the wife and his husband, when the husband wasn't the cheating party.
At least, he could find out this way, and now he can move on. Poor guy.
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[–]warlocc_Jr. Hamster Analyst1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Wow. You diverted blame from the problem then argued with your own suggestion after attributing it to me, all in three sentences.
Good job.
You do realize there are a whole lot of options available besides killing people if you don't want anything to do with them, child or otherwise?
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Agreed.
/u/poppypopsicles if you want to continue commenting in this sub, knock that shit off. Read the rules and comply with them. I've removed that ridiculous comment .
[–]lurkerhasarisenCurmdgeon Emeritus112 points113 points114 points (4 children) | Copy Link
What an absolutely vile woman. She was content to let her husband think she was a faithful wife, and if they child had been born white she would have let him continue to live her lies. "One night stand" my ass. Notice that the story she concocted was the one that made her seem the least bad under the circumstances ("It was only once and I don't even know his name so you DEFINITELY should not try to keep digging for more details!"). Only the fact that the baby is mulatto gave the truth away.
There are four victims in this little not-so-Greek tragedy: the husband and all three kids.
I'll stop now, because after reading the follow-up, almost anything else I write would force me to ban myself.
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience51 points52 points53 points (2 children) | Copy Link
And, not only should you not dig for any more details, you should help me support this child, because, well, you're a man, and I live with you, and the child lives with us, and you have a job, and I don't, and I have post partum depression, and I am in therapy, and you can support her and I can't, and it's not fair to the child for you to disown her because I'm a lying cheating skankho, and IT IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO.
Let me tell y'all what's gonna happen. This mom is in terrible shape according to the OP's update post. She's jobless, depressed, feeling all kinds of guilt and shame, soon to be divorced and fending for herself. She's in no shape to take care of a newborn by herself (which, by the way, is one reason young women were supposed to be married when they have kids, so that she has a strong young man around to help her). So what will happen is that if you get CPS involved, they'll look at the situation and say
Yeah, I don't believe for one minute that she doesn't know who the baby daddy is. Yes she does. She knows who the guy is. She just doesn't want to say because she doesn't want to take the guy to court and risk his anger, because she's soon to be out on her ass, alone, with a baby and two sons under 5 years old.
[–]SevereKnowledge19 points20 points21 points (1 child) | Copy Link
No only does she know the baby's daddy, she is probably still fucking him. She got away with it once. Why not do it again?
[–]RealMcGonzoJr. Hamster Analyst6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep.
Possibly the single most important thing about any LTR - she has to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that if she fucks up, you'll walk and never look back. Doesn't guarantee loyalty, of course - nothing does. But if she thinks she can cheat and get away with it, she will.
[–]tosernameschescksoutJr. Hamster Analyst6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
She's definitely lying.
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience81 points82 points83 points (29 children) | Copy Link
The opinions expressed in this comment are those of Aldabruzzo, and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of this subreddit or the moderators.
1) Protip to the married moms: if you cheat, and you get pregnant, and you don't want to get caught, have an abortion. Because....
2) Cheating and getting pregnant drastically increases the risks you'll get caught. Maybe not quite as dramatically as THIS woman got caught, but the chances are exponentially higher. Because medicine is relying on DNA and genetics more and more. DNA and genetics don't lie, even if married moms do. Yes, there's a chance the baby might be your husband's. There's also a big chance the baby is not your husbands. Paging Maury Povich....
3) Clearly, OP's STBX wife has a sexual preference, or affinity, for black men. She probably has had that preference for a long time, and it's something that he should have done his best to suss out before marrying her.
4) The only option here is divorce. When your wife has cucked you, and the ENTIRE WORLD will know your wife has cucked you because the evidence will exist forever and is plain as day for all to see, there's just no other option.
5) This man needs to dot all the i's and cross all the t's. He MUST make absolutely 100% certain that he is NOT listed on the BC as the father and that he absolutely and for all time disavows paternity of this child. If he can do it at all, if any state laws allow for it, he must petition a court for any kind of legal relief he can get to establish nonpaternity of this child.
He must make clear to everyone that he will not in any way or under any circumstances act as this child's father. No supporting the child, feeding the child or buying baby food or supplies for the child. No caring for the child. No 2 am feedings. No fatherly watching or sitting for the child. No interaction with the child. No paying any medical bills for the child. No taking the baby to any well baby visits. No making sure the child gets necessary medical care. No NOTHING for this child from him.
This sounds harsh. I don't care. He must do this to make sure he is not later hit with child support claims. (The law presumes that a woman's husband is the father of any children born to her. Though it is obvious that he is not the father, he must make sure he does not do anything to make it appear he's the father or that he's acknowledging responsibility for the child in any way, shape, manner or form.)
6) He must tell his STBXWife that she will not be allowed to use any joint marital funds to pay expenses for this child. He must tell her to immediately track down his STBX's baby daddy, congratulate BD on his daughter, and BD needs to immediately start paying child support. If BD can't pay support, oh well.... then STBXW will have to make other arrangements. Welfare. TANF. Medicare/Medicaid. Charity. The child's needs and support are not the OP's concern in any way, shape, manner or form.
He will also need to make clear that BD won't have any sort of visitation or seeing the child at his home where his sons are. If Baby Daddy wants to see his daughter, STBXWife and Baby Daddy can make arrangements for that to take place elsewhere.
He needs to petition the court for orders of protection to keep Baby Daddy out of his home. STBXWife made a kid with Baby Daddy. That has nothing to do with OP, or with his home. If BD wants a relationship with that child, that's STBXWife's problem, and it is her task to resolve it. OP does not have to allow his home to serve as a venue for visitation or a relationship or to support the new family STBXW chose to create.
EDIT: I've read the OP's post and update. It appears he would not have accepted my advice had he known of it. His choice, but it's not a course of action I'd recommend. I recommend the actions outlined in this post. END EDIT
7) Have every child born to your wife during the marriage subjected to a paternity test. You can get them at Big Box drugstores for about $150. Cheek swab yourself, cheek swab the kid, send the samples in the mail, wait a few weeks for results. If they aren't a positive match, if digital Maury says "You Are Not the Father", tell your wife there's a problem, get a formal test done, and get a lawyer.
8) DO NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE LISTED AS THE FATHER ON ANY CHILD'S BIRTH CERTIFICATE UNTIL YOU HAVE ESTABLISHED BEYOND A REASONABLE DOUBT THAT YOU ARE THAT CHILD'S FATHER.
9) It's a hell of a thing getting a red pill shoved down your throat before you're even in school. But that's what's happened to this man's sons. Perhaps that's the only bright spot in this otherwise sordid story. He will have to help them with that (and his story and manner of writing indicates he's... not well suited to the task.)
10) Do not let a woman like this escape the consequences of her actions. This is on her. End of discussion.
[–]AngryCockOfJusticeHarbinger of Dom Play, Purveyor of Skirts, Paragon of Hoe Tricks47 points48 points49 points (0 children) | Copy Link
one minor addition: never leave the home in case of separation despite what society taught you. This shit looks honorable in romantic movies and novels aimed for thots, but reality is far crueler and rancid. The house will automatically go to her since you left the premises voluntarily.
Let the society and internet shame you, since they'll never come to rescue you, pay the bills, and hell even let you a single night sleeping on a couch.
[–]goodmansaysfuckyouBig 🍆 energy misogynist17 points18 points19 points (11 children) | Copy Link
I happen to share these opinions as well. In addition (while I do not know the exact legalities) I would also add that from the very moment that it became apparent that the child is not yours (in this case in the labor and delivery room) the mother and new child would have to find a new place to live. I would not want her and/or her new BD anywhere near my offspring. She has shown a reckless disregard for consequences, morality, virtue, vows, and common fucking sense. She has no place providing any more influence upon my offspring than the bare minimums allowed by and enforced by the court. If I could have her forever removed from my son's life, then I would and they would be better off for it.
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience13 points14 points15 points (9 children) | Copy Link
And petition for sole custody of his sons. According to OP's update, STBXWife is jobless, in therapy, suffering from post partum depression, and is in no shape to take care of her sons.
She might not be in any shape to care for a newborn, but that's not OP's problem. The baby is not OP's problem. Let STBXW worry about that. Let Baby Daddy worry about that. Let CPS and government worry about that. Let charities worry about that.
If I were in this situation, I'd tell her and the baby to find other living arrangements, and the sons are staying with me in the marital home. I'd file petitions for divorce, for orders of protection, and for exclusive possession of the marital home pending divorce proceedings. STBXW is on her own after this.
[–]goodmansaysfuckyouBig 🍆 energy misogynist5 points6 points7 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Exactly what I was trying to say, but as usual you worded it better.
Short version: GTFO, Don't come back, and MY kids are staying here.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
I doubt even those are his. Poor guy.
[–]AlturiusSr. Hamster Analyst7 points8 points9 points (1 child) | Copy Link
OP says he got both his sons tested and the result were positive they are his.
Now he just needs to take Aldabruzzo's advice and at the very least make sure he is not named as the Baby Daddy on the birth certificate, because there is a time limit. She's deceived him once, got caught, so has nothing to lose being deceptive again. Nothing stopping her from lying or getting a 'friend' to pretend to be the daddy and fake a signature for the OP. Even a forged signature will be an uphill battle for the OP to convince the authorities he is not the daddy. Once that time limit has expired and if his name is on that birth certificate, then the State presumes he IS the father.
If the STBX wife "can't remember" or "doesn't know" who the real daddy is then that is her problem. She should have thought about this before betraying the trust of the OP who was working to keep her when Covid struck.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I am quite surprised.
[–]TrajanOptimus1174 points5 points6 points (4 children) | Copy Link
That all sounds good, in theory
But if she refuses to leave, he can't physically throw her, and a newborn, out of the marital home, especially during a pandemic
As unfair, and brutal as it is, in the eyes of the court, by far the easiest solution is to just declare that this man is the father, and that the wife is entitle to stay in the marital home
This keeps the wife and the child off of the government tab, ensures that CPS, social workers, psychiatrists, doctors and lawyers dont have to get involved, and saves the court the bad publicity of actually awarding sole custody to a father, while kicking a wife and her child out into charitable or government funded housing
The racial element would also be brought up, and generate a huge amount of needless press for the judge. As the courts have endeavoured to make clear, men are expendable, their feelings and wishes dont matter, they are a cash cow to be milked, used and abused by women all over, women who can never be allowed to take responsibility for their own reckless destruction of a family unit, all because some guy gave her tingles
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience4 points5 points6 points (3 children) | Copy Link
as a practical matter he will not be declared the child's father unless he takes affirmative steps to have that happen. If he took the steps I outlined, chances are he would not be. But according to his update, this man is actually considering adopting the child (with the woman he's divorcing). If he does that, he'll be the child's father.
He could get an order requiring her to move. THing is, with her out of work, he'll be ordered to support her pendente lite, meaning loosely "until the court dispute is over and the court orders otherwise". So he'll be required to support her as his wife just as he would if the marriage were not in the process of being dissolved. Unless one of them agrees to leave, they can both stay and it's unlikely the court would order it.
I don't agree that the court would just declare this man the father. He obviously is not and is disputing his paternity. The only way he'll be declared the father is if he either (1) adopts the child or (2) takes all kinds of steps indicating he's acknowledging paternity, including allowing his name to be put on the birth certificate, holding the child out to the public as his, and supporting the child financially.
[–]TrajanOptimus1172 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
I was under the impression that the fact that he was married to the child's mother when it was born made him the father anyway, regardless of whether he disputed paternity, or the patently obvious fact that the child isn't his
In all honesty, even if that's not true, he's probably done enough already for the courts to declare him the father anyway. As I said, they will do literally anything possible to ensure that the mother and child don't become their problem, and if it means saddling a man with 18 years of child support because he helped take care of it for a few months after it was born, then so be it
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
The law recognizes two kinds of presumptions: Rebuttable and conclusive. It's a rebuttable presumption that children born to a married woman are those of her husband. That means that presumption can be refuted and overcome with sufficient evidence. In this case, the OP's presumption of paternity can be very easily rebutted because the evidence is irrefutable that OP did not sire this child.
A conclusive presumption cannot be disputed in any way.
I don't agree he's already done enough for courts to declare OP the father. He has disputed paternity from the get go. He filed for divorce from the mother. From the start, he has been waving his hands shouting I AM NOT THE FATHER, I DO NOT ACKNOWLEDGE PATERNITY to anyone who will listen. To the extent he's been supporting the child, it's been out of necessity and under duress. He's not doing so freely and voluntarily.
[–]TrajanOptimus1171 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
That's fair, I'm not from the US, so wasn't sure if it was rebuttable or not. Nevertheless, the fact that he is still allowing the mother and child to live with him may be enough for a court to declare that he has accepted the responsibility of supporting them
I completely agree that this is unbelievably idiotic and corrupt. It's as if the guy is being punished for ensuring that his son's mother and half -sister aren't tossed out of their home during a pandemic, whereas a guy who tossed them out and disclaimed all involvement and responsibility immediately would stand a much better chance of both achieving full custody, and not being on the hook for child support to his wife's bastard
Duress and involuntariness are almost never available to men in situations like this. They're available to women when they want to rip up a prenup that they've freely signed, but almost never to a man.
The fact that he's been put in an unbelievably difficult position by his wife's actions, may well be brushed aside by the courts, who, as I've said, will twist and manipulate everything to make the man pay, just so that you wife and child don't become their problem
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Agreed. Always be ready to walk away. It is sad that men have to go that far, but it is what it is.
[–]Uhtred_McUhtredsonSmells like Harvey Weinsteins Fingers16 points17 points18 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Well said. All common sense, but this dude is already laying the groundwork to stay with his wife.
I can’t leave yet because of Covid
She is severely depressed
I want to do what’s best for my sons
I’ve bonded with the baby
The bio father is guaranteed to not be in the picture
I want to stick it to the racists
I don’t hate her, I just feel no love for her
They’ll be living together for months to come, she will wear him down, blame the divorce and he will have a change of heart and cancel the divorce.
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience9 points10 points11 points (1 child) | Copy Link
i know. He's making his choices. I can't make people choose the way I would. All I can do is lay out what happens. I do fully understand why men act this way. The protection/provision instinct is that strong. It is the hardest thing in the world for a man to walk away from a vulnerable woman, and a woman is at her most vulnerable and needy immediately after she's given birth. Both men and women know this.
I have no doubt that people in this man's life are mercilessly and brutally shaming him and raking him over the coals for planning to divorce this woman. I can imagine the statements:
It's a lot to hold up under. If he goes through with a divorce everyone in his life will run him up the flagpole, ostracize him, shame him, shittalk him behind his back, and say all manner of shitty terrible things about him and to his face. They'll shame his sons as being sons of "that bad evil man who divorced his wife when she'd just had a baby" and gloss over the fact that the baby was the product of her infidelity.
[–]OverkillengineCasts Pearls to the Swine9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Men would be well served to memorize this concept/reply to shamers:
"It's easy to moralize when someone else is paying the bills for it."
99% of those shitheads would shut their yaps tighter than Fort Knox if they thought that speaking up would get them assigned part of the bill for her behavior.
[–]AlturiusSr. Hamster Analyst4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I wonder why? Wouldn't be because she's been caught playing at shags and is now realising her little world is collapsing in on her. imho I think "Post Natal Depression" is just a smoke screen to hide the real reason she's depressed "Penis Not the Daddy's"
[–]OverkillengineCasts Pearls to the Swine15 points16 points17 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I'd like to add on that on top of all that, he must be very diligent and timely in his actions in order to impress upon any malicious actors within the State that he will not be an easy target and not worth the effort to attempt to fleece.
Blindly trusting the system to work ethically of its own impetus is how one gets buttfucked with no lube by the system. One has to force it to work, even at the cost of being a ruthless and unrelenting jackass to annoy and legally compel the bureaucrats into doing their jobs properly.
[–]slowsuby6 points7 points8 points (2 children) | Copy Link
I’m not a big proponent of abortion but holy shit, if I was that chick, I’d have aborted the moment I wasn’t sure who the father might be. Especially if there was a chance the kid would come out a different color. The anxiety alone would be extremely hard to deal with.
Imagine how fucking embarrassing it would be. Presumably they are using the same OB as they did with the first two. If it’s anything like my wife’s OB, you’re probably pretty close with the OB by this point. Then, you deliver a baby conceived during infidelity in front of everyone and it’s very obvious. Wow.
That all could have been avoided with a conversation with the husband about what happened instead of gambling on the outcome. But if the wife had that much integrity, she probably wouldn’t have cheated in the first place.
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience6 points7 points8 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I'm not a proponent of abortion either, not by any stretch. Just thinking about what a woman can do in situations like this. And this woman put herself in an impossible situation: Got pregnant, not sure that her H is the father. Her options are: 1) have an abortion, or 2) come clean to her husband, or 3) (what she did) take her chances.
The only way to try to avoid any long lasting negative consequences is abortion. And at that point, to really conceal it she has to go to someone other than her regular gynecologist to keep him from seeing it on the insurance statements and medical bills. She has to get someone she can really really trust to go with her and take her home afterwards. The easiest part is that she has to lie that she's having a miscarriage or a really bad period.
Or, she can come clean and tell her husband she got pregnant and had an abortion, but lie that she just didn't "want to be pregnant right now".
[–]slowsuby3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I mean, that guy might not, but I’d divorce my wife if she pulled that shit. Luckily we are both anti abortion so it wouldn’t happen, but murdering my kid would definitely be grounds for a divorce.
It just seems so illogical to roll the dice like OOP’s wife did. I guarantee if she went to PP and said “I need to have this done and my husband can’t find out about it”, they have ways to do it discretely. I can’t imagine it’s that uncommon.
Let this be a lesson to everyone, men and women, to be a fucking adult and end things with your SO if you want to raw dog strangers.
[–]422522526 points7 points8 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Excellent. Saved for the next moron I talk to at work with this issue.
I got redpilled as a kid. My grandma was advising me not to let society dictate my sexuality, in the course of which she bragged about how she would fuck all kinds of people in their church while hubby was deployed in vietnam. I remember being eight trying to work out how a threesome went, because I couldn't figure out what the second guy was.
If things were that bad back then, I knew I had slim choices going forward. She was hot, and played her churchy, down home mother cards well enough to sucker someone into it. He knew right away and she spent most of my parent's childhood banging her way through the phonebook.
To this day when we talk it's a role reversal, with her lecturing me about 'testing the milk' before settling down and me rolling my eyes at the inevitable effects of such perversion. Her life is a hellscape but she thinks all the dick she took more than makes up for living in a piss ridden shithole.
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience9 points10 points11 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Your grandma told you, her young grandson, about her sexual infidelity? Your grandmother told you, her grandson, about how she cheated on Grandpa?
Are you serious?
I can believe a woman in 2020 America bragging (on social media) about cheating on her husband. I can even believe a grandma 50 years ago doing all that cheating. Wives have been cheating on husbands since marriage has existed. But a grandma 10, 20, 30 years ago talking to her grandson about her sex life??
Grandmas are grandmas. A grandson should not even be able to conceive of a grandma having a sex life. The ENTIRE POINT of sex lives is that they're private, and they sure as fuck are supposed to be private to our children and grandchildren.
[–]422522527 points8 points9 points (1 child) | Copy Link
No joke. She's always been a free-spirit type, from what I gather after her whole churchy life blew up she just jumped in (with her daughters too) into the hippie/drug shit. I had wondered why my parents kept me away from her for so long, I think the constant guilt tripping of "why u take my grandson!?!?" finally got to them so they opened pandora's box. Granted, she didn't use nasty wording in the beginning. I remember it being something like "Oh sweetie love is a wonderful thing, don't let some old people at church tell you it has to be one way or the other. Some of the best love of my live was found with people of all stripes, my favorite is sharing yourself with your best friends and companions.... it's cruel to deny people that kind of experience, all that church nonsense is just meant to punish you for having needs and desires." As a kid she would constantly tell me how cool and acceptable it was to be gay, too. I was allowed to avoid her to about once a year, even then I would usually be allowed to hide with a gameboy. It got old hearing about all the wonderful old guys in media who were manly men, that I should think about imitating and "finding love with a man".
I think she got fried from molly, or ecstasy, or WTF she was on. She was a small town church girl who got pulled way into degeneracy and she reformed her personality around it as a rebellious warrior fighting for love and joy against the staid, shameful regime that forced her to keep her sexuality locked up.
I never got cool grandparents, I usually found foster ones though collecting WWII stuff and coming over to check out their guns instead. My other one was a second gen career feminist who hated us. But my neighbor was a B-25 gunner, he's usually the one I call grandpa instead. He actually taught me useful stuff.
[–]WaitingForWormwood3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This is a good man story. The end makes the read worth it.
[–]CarilPT3 points4 points5 points (2 children) | Copy Link
What does STBX mean?
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Soon to be ex
[–]CarilPT1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Ahh I see, ty!
[–]masquerage0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Number 8 should be in bold.
[–]Mundane_Worldliness7Jr. Hamster Analyst43 points44 points45 points (4 children) | Copy Link
(I’m black) the original poster seems to have everything figured out, it’s good he doesn’t blame the kid. The complications associated with raising a biracial child are for the ex and her boyfriend to contend with.
[–]x-typo29 points30 points31 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Hell of a father this one is. The mother on another hand....
[–]jihocechJr. Hamster Analyst13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
An evil opressing patriarch, isn´t he?
[–]TrajanOptimus11718 points19 points20 points (1 child) | Copy Link
I was in full agreement with him in terms of ensuring his sons treated their sister well, didn't ostracise her, or blame her for their parents divorce, and ensuring that essentially they were taught to look after her and treat her equally
When he started talking about bonding with the child, and wanting to adopt her, he just came across as a pathetic doormat. She is nothing whatsoever to do with him, she is his ex wife's child, that is all, and you just know the wife is going to beat him over the head with this in future ("you aren't even her real father, so shut up")
Imagine the example this sets to his sons; they are going to either become the biggest soyboy cucks around; or, they are going to grow up resenting him so much that they turn into non committal, women hating sociopaths
[–]Mundane_Worldliness7Jr. Hamster Analyst6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I didn’t read the update at first, indeed, he should divorce his wife. He was doing good there for awhile.
[–]hatefulreason40 points41 points42 points (1 child) | Copy Link
and lemme guess, she didn't say anything for 9 months because she wasn't sure :))
[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Typical
[–]3HardWaySr. Hamster Analyst36 points37 points38 points (1 child) | Copy Link
He is only at the start of a long road he hasn't even begun to walk down. He has no idea what the court system has in store for him.
[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This... sadly true. The real victim which is the man will get punished and made more victim out of for a disgusting behaviour of a so called married woman. Poor man and poor kids having to unfortunately be put together with an evil woman. How can one create such a chaos for a lot of people with just simply opening her legs for someone who isn’t her husband? Oh I know why, because they never fkin have to deal with the consequences so they do it easily. This happens way often than we know. The only difference here is sadly the race of the baby. Would it be same race, no one will know.
[–]silly_birbJr. Hamster Analyst31 points32 points33 points (0 children) | Copy Link
They always get pregnant with Chad or Tyrone when they already have 1 or 2 kids with the beta provider.
He is blackmailed to provide for Tyrone spawn or his own kids will suffer the same as their black step-sister.
The husband should get full custody and then send the exwife with the bastard back to Tyrone (if he takes her in...)
[–]copper_blood24 points25 points26 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Remember to concentrate on your two kids. Fight like hell to get custody and child support. It's now up to your soon to be EX to worry about the third child.
[–]Mundane_Worldliness7Jr. Hamster Analyst11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This is an excellent idea, and though rare, it’s possible. Back in my social worker days, I knew of a few cases in which a woman paid child support to a man.
[–]SheerSocialSuicideDread Game Advocate26 points27 points28 points (4 children) | Copy Link
yeah, 'one' night...
[–]TrajanOptimus11713 points14 points15 points (2 children) | Copy Link
The odds of getting pregnant from a one night stand are incredibly low. And, even if it was the result of a ONS, what sort of disgusting whore lets a complete stranger, a stranger whose name she apparently doesn't even know, ride bareback and nut inside of her?
In all likelihood, she fucked a Tryone from the hood in their own city, and conveniently claimed it happened as a result of a ONS on the other side of the country, which is majorly convenient for her story, and gives the best possible likelihood for getting Mr. Cuck to not divorce her
[–]minitntman13 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
That makes more sense as to how it couldn't be a ONS
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
"tryone"
LOL
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I don't buy that either.
[–]bgovern21 points22 points23 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Kids I need to talk to you. Your mother is a whore. While she did fuck a black guy, and mothered a bastard mixed-race child, the thing I really want you to concentrate on here is just what a low-down lying gutter slut your mom is, and not race. The fact that she betrayed our family and threw away 10 years of marriage and your future well-being for 6 minutes of hedonistic pleasure by fucking a stranger (who just happened to be black) then lied about it to our faces until she couldn't maintain the lie anymore, is really at the heart of this. His race has nothing to do with your mother being a faithless, shiftless, heartless, filthy, diseased, harpy with no redeeming qualities. I still love you guys despite the fact that she squeezed you out of the putrid diseased cunt that she offered to a stranger. That's all I wanted to tell you, now go play ball ya' little scamps.
[–]PM_me_your_fronthole3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Savage and perfect
[–]KingAbdul130 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Amazing response, doesn’t matter than she cheated with a black guy, she a whore
[–]AngryCockOfJusticeHarbinger of Dom Play, Purveyor of Skirts, Paragon of Hoe Tricks19 points20 points21 points (0 children) | Copy Link
she was emotional and vulnerable, and just wanted to be loved. /s
won't be surprised if there are "what about baby" cunts and thots responding to the poor dude shaming him into child support
The wife will enjoy alimony, child and spousal support.
[–]Captainbuttman17 points18 points19 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I used to think relationship_advice was based, or at least more so than AITA which is firmly anti man. But its increasingly becoming more and more fake. More and more 'exciting' stories get voted to the top and then an update comes out with an amazing TWIST.
The story in the OP? The twist is he still wants to raise his wife's new bastard as his own, while divorcing his wife.
There was another 'story' where a woman became pregnant and believed her husband had raped her in her sleep. The twist? In an update her doctor dated the time of conception to a day she remembered having sex with her husband, but he admitted to fingering her in her sleep anyway.
[–]kevin32Reddit's Ambassador for NiceGuys™[S,M] 15 points16 points17 points (19 children) | Copy Link
A reminder that we only allow civil, constructive comments about the problems of dating women with mixed-raced kids. Blatant racist comments will be removed and the user banned.
See our stance on women's racial preferences here and here.
[–]Mundane_Worldliness7Jr. Hamster Analyst7 points8 points9 points (8 children) | Copy Link
In general this sub is shockingly good on race, I always liked the old redpill, but it had more racial issues than this sub.
[–]jihocechJr. Hamster Analyst9 points10 points11 points (7 children) | Copy Link
I think it is because all the issues discussed here (single motherhood, chasing badboys, sluttiness, drama) are much in the black community. Good men have it worse there - look at Will Smith.
[–]Mundane_Worldliness7Jr. Hamster Analyst11 points12 points13 points (4 children) | Copy Link
😊 As a black guy, who considers himself to be a good guy, I vouch for that. Looking at our community, you see the future for society.
[–]jihocechJr. Hamster Analyst3 points4 points5 points (2 children) | Copy Link
America is and always has been extreme - puritanism and porn industry, workaholism and laziness, segregation and diversity madness, pacifism and burnig German Japanese, Korean and Vietnamese cities...
I am Central European, we still have some common sense here, but we are now about 2000 of the USA. I still hope we will see the mistakes that were done, and avoid it.
[+][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]Mundane_Worldliness7Jr. Hamster Analyst1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
We don’t mean to imply that the US is a cesspool, it’s still possible to live very well, it just takes some knowing.
[–]polakfuryInvested heavily in Questions pre-20083 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
GBG - Good black guy
[–]422522522 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Worst of all, that culture is held up and enforced by society. If you decide to get up, make something better out of yourself, and move up you're treated as an uncle tom and disowned by your people. There's very little unity once you break from the pack.
"Oh full ride to harvard? Traitor. You should go to Grambling!"
[–]Dazzling_Accident_140 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
What do you mean?
[–]UltimaterializerX8 points9 points10 points (4 children) | Copy Link
My bullshit detector is going off, and my bullshit detector is almost never wrong. I’ll be absolutely floored if that story ends up being real.
[–]warlocc_Jr. Hamster Analyst9 points10 points11 points (2 children) | Copy Link
To be honest, I don't care if it's fake. I'm judging the commenters that treat it as real, and how insane some of the suggestions are.
[–]askmrciaJr. Hamster Analyst5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
That's usually my mentality too when it comes to posts from that sub. Don't really care if it real or fake, I'm more concerned with how people react as if it was real.
It's telling when you see comments with tons of up votes siding with the woman in these types of situations
[–]animalmother20171 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
A friend of mine is a nicu nurse. She says they get about one of these every couple weeks.
[–]TheOGZombieSlaya5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Half the stories on there are fake, so I wouldn’t be surprised.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 5 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Addendum: keep rule 4 in mind.
DO NOT GO TO THE ORIGINAL THREAD AND SAY A PEEP.
If you do, you will be banned here.
(Hopefully it remains locked, and this won't be a problem.)
[–]polakfuryInvested heavily in Questions pre-20081 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
So many comments tho . Too cluttered
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I agree
[–]x-typo4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
HEAR HEAR!
[–]decaptcha2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
"We only allow comments we like"
[–]rojotabletpreacher13 points14 points15 points (2 children) | Copy Link
This guy is a saint. I would have been sure to drop them at one of the nicer homeless shelters and then patted myself on the back for being a good guy. She has always belonged to the street and now looks like she is being reclaimed. Good riddance.
[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Same here. She knows who Tyrone is and should find Tyrone to deal with him the fall out. The man should be able to walk out freely from this with his own kids. Sadly we live in a fkd up society that punishes the true victims which is the man and the kids
[–]DextroShade3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I'd be racing home from the hospital by myself to change the locks.
[–]XxPegasusxX13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Divorce and ditch her and the baby, fight in court for the kids that are his.
[–]TrayofBoiledDog14 points15 points16 points (0 children) | Copy Link
It's amazing how much instinctual shame this brings.
[–]houseoftolstoyUnchivalrous Christian12 points13 points14 points (7 children) | Copy Link
To me it is not that the cheating was worse because it was with a man of a different race, but rather that it simply makes it much more obvious that she cheated. In a way it worked out better than if she chose to sleep with a man of a different race, because the baby being half black made it quite clear that she cheated. Had it been a man of the same race, who knows if he ever would have found out. Had he been at all suspicious, she would probably act indignant at the (accurate) accusation that she was cheating on him.
If you cannot trust a woman, you should not marry her. If you cannot trust any woman, you should not get married at all. This man had to get DNA tests just to make sure the other two were his, but now so many men are thinking the same thing by default. It is fortunate that most countries have not banned paternity testing like France has (yes I know that you can technically get one with a court order, (with the wife's permission I recall), but that is basically just a ban with extra steps that make pretend that it is not a violation of the father's right to know).
[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival4 points5 points6 points (6 children) | Copy Link
France banned paternity test? Wow, we really do live in a free world
[–]DextroShade5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
France literally has state-sponsored cuckoldry.
[–]Chgralac735 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
there was a story how a french navy ship had to return because of technical failure to port, 197 out of 200 sailors divorced as once they came home, they caught wives cheating.
afterwards navy decided, they will send sms to wives if ship is going back to port
[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I stand corrected. France is fkd.. sorry cucked! I’ll go there to enjoy the fun thanks to sexual liberation
[–]Rick_OShay11 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
It certainly explains all the anti-French sex jokes I find in British comedy.
[–]TrajanOptimus1173 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Yep, it is completely illegal. Some French guys will send the tests to be completed in Switzerland, but there legitimate criminal penalties if you are caught doing so
[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
With that law, one will be truly a fool to bang these h o s bareback without having a vasectomy or bang them at all. And here was I planning a fun sex trip to France one day, I’ll have to adjust my strategy cos now this says to me there are lots of CC riders in that country with male cuckoldry being legalized over there
[–]Useless_Skills12 points13 points14 points (5 children) | Copy Link
I don't think this is a real post.
[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Same way I wouldn’t think this is a real world but it is. Welcome to the era of 🤡s enjoy your stay cos these things are here to stay sadly
[–]MagicGainbow2 points3 points4 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Same, the man is too old to be that naive. that or it's shock and he'll snap back.
[–]AldabruzzoManage your own goddamn pain and life experience7 points8 points9 points (1 child) | Copy Link
i fully believe a man can think this way. I fully believe this society can train men into the thought processes and concerns this OP is raising in his post.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I've witnessed it. I have personally witnessed men take back cheating whores. There were no kids involved (thank God), but it didn't take Red Pill knowledge to predict what happened next.
[–]Preoximerianas0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The post might not be real, but the comments replying to it are.
[–]RedLetterWordSr. Hamster Analyst11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I think this is a good example of what is at stake in terms of male sovereignty.
The OP had a choice. He chose servitude. He says he did so to try and help integrate a better life for his sons, and the innocence of their half-sister.
The blue pillers of the world will applaud him for that, but this sacrifice will do nothing more for him than that pat on the back. There will be no incentive for his sacrifice other than those that the man intrinsically builds for himself.
He isn't going to get a better career for it.
He isn't going to get more interest from other women for it.
He isn't going to build more wealth for it; in fact, he's going to have to pay child support to her.
He isn't going to get access to any kind of support group to help cope with it, other than therapy he himself buys.
Perhaps one day, assuming all goes to his plan, these three kids will look at what a great man their father is, and try hard to live up to the standard he set. The odds are against him, but that is the payout.
I truly believe that life will be better for those two boys and that girl because of the sacrifice this man is ready to make. In the eyes of the mainstream, however, this man isn't making any sacrifice at all; those kids are owed these choices in their eyes.
There are swaths of men that are learning. No good deed goes unpunished, and this good man, as well as all the people tangentially affected, will fight an uphill battle the rest of their lives for his soon-to-be ex-wife's selfish choice.
I personally wouldn't make the same choice as this man. I am glad there are still men out there that will look at a shit sandwich and eat it rather than let his children and some other guy that fucked his wife's child bare the brunt of the consequences of this woman's behavior. Our society, as a whole, will be better for it. This man's life, though? The life of those kids? The life of the philanderer? That of the extended families?
That will no longer be me. And I, at one point in my life, would have.
I no longer wish to be "good" like this man. I believe that I am not the only one.
There is subtext here that is really getting overlooked:
The fucking dude that fucked this guy's wife. Oh sure, the commenters in that thread pay the lip service to what a bad guy that guy is. BUT THAT IS ALL. He will never face music the way OP is getting ready to face.
I'll repeat this: all because of the selfish choices of a single woman.
If you are here, you now know what these people are capable of, and more importantly, what they aren't.
Protect yourself.
[–]spridle6012 points13 points14 points (2 children) | Copy Link
" so she was forced to admit that the child was a result of a one night stand last year."
I don't believe it. One night stand? I don't think so.
[–]DicamVeritatem10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Agreed. And Tyrone’s probably wasn’t the first extramarital dick she’d taken.
Not the first or only time she’s done this. Just the first time she got caught.
[–]AlturiusSr. Hamster Analyst1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Or was it multiple stands/gang bang in one night?
[–]Uhtred_McUhtredsonSmells like Harvey Weinsteins Fingers10 points11 points12 points (1 child) | Copy Link
It’s amazing to see Alpha fux/Beta biz even on a subconscious level with this woman.
Any rational person would immediately head to a pharmacy and get a Plan B pill after such an egregious faux pas.
Even if she wasn’t sure of the pregnancy, as soon as she noticed symptoms, she could have still gotten an abortion. Maybe she has a moral qualm about it. Shame she has no such qualms about fucking outside her marriage.
Anyway, on some level, she CHOSE to carry this baby to term. Despite the obvious consequences. Despite the fact of the high likelihood it was obviously another man’s baby.
Deep down she knew her Beta husband would eventually do the right thing and she will get off from this scott free.
[–]AlturiusSr. Hamster Analyst5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
She obviously decided to take her chances, but 50/50 are high odds to play baby daddy roulette with. How do we know it was just one man involved, when there could actually be several?
Even if the OP decides to "do the right thing" by society's expectations to man up and 'forgive' her, he must still make sure it is NOT his name on the birth certificate. She might be all "sorry darling" now but in a few years time, when he has bonded with her daughter there is nothing to stop her from pulling the rug from underneath him and file for divorce claiming "he doesn't trust me!", then he is paying Child Maintenance for a kid that is not his own.
[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I don’t know what’s more sad, the OP post or the comments on his post. Wow. The world is really coming to an end. Poor girl. I’m sure the unfaithful h o of a wife feels like she’s the victim here and will get every support she doesn’t deserve. Marriage lol tell me more about it
[–]huzaa8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I think he was pretty lucky, that the baby turned out to be black. If it would be a white boy, it could happen that he would never knew it wasn't his.
I also don't get how the woman thought she might get away with this. Probably cheated on more guys who weren't black and she thought there is a chance it's theirs? Otherwise it would be hard to pin this as hyperpigmentational desease.
[–]CelestialAmorphous8 points9 points10 points (0 children) | Copy Link
why does he have to be the super hero? so cringy she basically got away scot free with raw dogging another man. no helping some folk
[–]DextroShade7 points8 points9 points (2 children) | Copy Link
If I were this poor unfortunate man, I would have left the hospital as soon as I saw the bastard wasn't mine. The locks would be changed and I would immediately contact a lawyer to start divorce proceedings. The stbx wife can come in to collect her belongings, but that bastard will never enter my home. I would simply tell the other kids that mommy betrayed daddy in the worst possible way and leave it at that for now. I could care less what happened to the stbx and her bastard, maybe she should track down Tyrone.
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[–]meeritaJr. Hamster Analyst5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
This is why I will never marry. Oh god, how crazy the world is with these hypergamous women.
[–]kokofiki3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
They never stop
[–]bigdaddyguap5 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
This story is probably fake. I don’t trust any stories on reddit tbh
[–]moorekomUrban Hoe Guerrilla6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The comments and the white knighting are instructive though, isn't it?
[–]tookurjobs7 points8 points9 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Lolol suuuure
[–]WeatherfordCast5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
How calm and accepting he is of the situation is disgusting and bizarre. I’m betting most men would’ve kicked them to the curb
[–]Dovahhkiin644 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I would have thrown her out with her bastard baby. Once you cheat you don't belong anywhere near me.
[–]tosernameschescksoutJr. Hamster Analyst5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
What a shitty situation. She had kids with this guy already, and THEN cheats. Hypergamy knows no limits.
I would encourage him to find the father, not only to see what his wife chose, but to explain that a divorce is underway and hey, "You're a daddy now! You're going to have some new responsibilities, and maybe you should just go for my wife because that shit's over for me." It sucks, but just let go completely.
[–]Griever114Ardently tames STD riddled cunts3 points4 points5 points (3 children) | Copy Link
Its a "one" night stand because she got caught.
How much we gonna bet that this kind of shit has been going on for a while and he is just lucky his other two "seedlings" just happen to luck out to be his.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]Griever114Ardently tames STD riddled cunts1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
Fixed.
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Reapproved
[–]CreflowDollars4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This is the type of shit that makes people jump to conclusions when they find out Im with a white woman. Hard to imagine those two boys not growing up hating black people or that BLACK girl (dont come at me with the "mixed" shit either cuz the cops aint shooting mixed bullets at us) not growing up either hating white people or hating black men since her father will likely be absent from her life. Many white men express disgust with white women who date interracially but trust me, no one is more disgusted by the majority of them than someone in my position.
[–]KavaNotGuiltyProne to be argumentative3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The top comment is just so special:
Edit: Love my new flair!
It looks like the OP of that post is just baiting/LARPing. There's no way it's real.
[–]xbregax5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I understand that if you're in a relationship, you have a chance of getting cheated on and that's the gamble you take but damn she just had to be extra evil and fuck raw too. Potentially exposing her husband to all kinds of STDs 😡
[–]UndulatingSky3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The reason why there is a stigma around black men and people's wives cheating on them with black men is because of pornography. There is a fucking HUGE fetishization of black men, specifically in cuckoldry, which reduces them to basically animals. The stereotype that black guys have bigger dicks also plays into that industry of cuckold pornography, and it makes people get internalized hatred towards black men, or they dehumanize them in their own minds, reducing them to a walking penis (You can see it in the way that barely no pornos with black guys in them that are professionally made don't include the key term "BBC"). Don't blame black people for the shitty industry that porn peddlers and cuckolds contrived.
[–]Bing_Bang_Bam3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Honestly this guy seems 100% except for his choice in hoes.
[–]TwentyOneBeers4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
His pressing issue, that his sons would be affected is a way that are pushed towards racism and the top comment that basically tells him to be a stepdad are beyond retarded.
[–]Broncoli4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
It's kinda disturbing how focused he is on the racist angle. Dude, that is the least of your worries now. Being a "good ally" isn't going to save your marriage, help you save face, or otherwise make a bad situation better.
Assuming this is real to begin with, and not just a way to catfish supposed racists.
[–]f3m1n15m15c4nc3r1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The kid and the whore should have to deal with the shame of the bitch’s behavior and the whole family should ostracize them. It’s shit for the kid, but hopefully it will grow up to resent its slut of a mother and will appreciate normal relationships.
[–][deleted] (2 children) | Copy Link
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[–]Pimp87Pumped up for the Pussy Carnival6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
🤡 world
[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]ActionJeansTM4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
How can he be so sure the other 2 kids are really his?
[–]KingAbdul130 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Ayo solid question lmao
[–]oh_no_aliens[email protected]2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
did this dumbfuck stupid whore honestly think she'd get away with it?? Did she honestly in her retarded hamster brain think her hubby would accept an obvious biracial child that isn't his?? What a fucking retard, I can't wait to see her bumble profile holding her precious little escuincle with her screaming where have all the good men gone.
I hope he gets full custody of his boys.
[–]robboman882 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
She got blacked lol
[–]KneedHelpQuicc3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
I bet money the bitch will abuse the baby whether physically or emotionally due to HER actions. She has no fucking credentials to raise a black child especially in times like this, she’s a greedy, lying slut with no morals or considerations for her husband or children. The child will be severely emotionally stunted. Even if the story is fake, shit like this IS happening. Fuck would I marry a bitch for, fuck would I even trust one in a LTR for? Spin plates till death date
[–]asdf333azaSr. Hamster Analyst3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
He needs new friends. They would of been fine with him raising another mans kids so long as it was white. That's kind of gross. Black or White, paternity fraud is GROSS. He would of been cucked either way. I'm happy the kid was black. Happy his wife was so comfortable as to be blatantly stupid and not even try to hide or cover it up. With that black kid, its undeniable proof. The alternative would be another man being a victim of paternity fraud. Theres no reason every man shouldn't be testing their children in this day and age.
And in some states, I heard it doesnt matter if your wife cheated. If your wife has a kid, while you guys are married, ITS YOUR KID LEGALLY. Regardless. So that black child would be legally his, regardless of this divorce. And he will be lucky to get his other kids in the divorce.
Georgia is one of those states. "Under Georgia law, any child born to the wife during marriage is presumed to be the husband’s child. DNA testing, by itself is irrelevant. This issue must be legally addressed immediately"
This brings up another issue, IF the biological Tyrone wanted his parental rights (doubtful) than because the mom is married she could fight tooth and nail to keep him from getting those rights. A women could get pregnant, marry another guy and BAM, your parental rights are gone. Depending on the state.
[–]mariusalb2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Single mother for life.
[–]goldenshowerstorm2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The top comment is actually terrible advice. If he takes on any relationship with the bastard child a court could find him responsible for child support. There have been several cases where a father assumed a fatherly role and then the state decides he's financially responsible because the baby daddy is long gone and tax payers would have to pay otherwise. Just don't raise someone else's child unless you want to be financially responsible until they're 18 or 25 years old.
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]AlturiusSr. Hamster Analyst1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
OMG - When I began reading I thought this could easily be due to a throwback to grand parent or great grand parent, then I read to the end of the second paragraph and my heart sank. Life can be so cruel to the least deserving people.
It isn't the boys' half sister that broke up the marriage, but her infidelity and the actions of a third party.
I'm sorry that this is happening to you. You don't deserve this. Easy for me to say, but please don't make decisions whilst you are still emotionally raw in case they come back to bite you. Divorce is difficult anyway, more so when you have a blatantly valid reason as you do. I would suggest getting legal advice on your options. You know the truth from the outset, so I hope that this lessens the pain than someone discovering infidelity years later after bonding with the child. I'm sure most folk here won't think any less of you whether you go through with the divorce or decide to stay. If you do decide to stay, then do not do it for the sake of the children.
I doubt that this is fiction.
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Do not directly link other subreddits.
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]Typo-MAGAshivOfficial Bloopie Chaser, Drive-by Asshole[M] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Rule 1.
[–]jackandjill220 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Interesting.
[–]Rick_OShay10 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
> I've been disgusted by some of the comments I've heard from family members, friends, coworkers and others, all who seem to be fixated on the racial angle of this.
What were some of the things they said?
[–]minitntman10 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Not that the man is in the right mind currently.
[–]BlogginginvicecitySr. Hamster Analyst0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Fucked another dude? Well she's married to him "in the eyes of the lord" now, so her problems aren't mine. At least until the state enforcers come along and remind me that the government is really tryna get out of paying for this one.
[–]Thetrvler0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
This pisses me off because all this inevitably does is teach women “it doesn’t matter because the man will just love them anyway”.
[–]imtheworstatreddit0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
The story is fake
[–]sdparquinn0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh fucking hell... ofcourse jackasses focus on the race and all the racial shit comes along for the ride.
I’m a big old gay hoe. My body count is sky high and I’ve done it with men of every race many many times.
And the obsession our broader culture has with “BBC cucking” isn’t based in any statistically significant reality. (Seriously interracial cucking probably represents less than one-one hundredth of a single percent of pregnancies from infedelity)
Now that dude has to deal with becoming a living embodiment of that shit despite the fact that he’s probably entirely sexually adequate.
Fuck this sick society.
[–]KingAbdul130 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
As a black guy( I blame porn) when u start to see bs like “whItE gUy GeT cUcKed bY a BuLl”( is that suppose to make me feel better & crazily it’s glorified lmao, 1st we’re more than just our dick & believe it or no we don’t all have giant Mandingos )& it’s was definitely not a one night stand, in my opinion he shouldn’t take care of the baby at all, not his responsibility, it all the woman’s fault & action have consequences, idgaf that’s the baby is black & I’ll treat it the same if it wasn’t 🤷🏻♀️
[–]coloradocaniac0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Cheaters are repugnant regardless of "tingles" "muhvag" or other assorted idiocies.
[–]Dazzling_Accident_140 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
His wife cheated on him and had a bastard (that she wasn't even planning to tell him about until the baby was born and turned out to be mixed revealing the sham) ruining their marriage and disrupting the home of their other children and he's more concerned about not looking racist than anything else.
I can kinda see why his wife cheated on him, not gonna lie.
[–]itskelvinn0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Dude OP needs to stand up for himself. It’s like he’s taking responsibility for his wife cheating and is trying to erase it or something. He doesn’t want to admit that she did everything wrong?
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[–]DextroShade5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
Only weak and pathetic people place the needs of strangers above their own, so fuck off with that bullshit!