Do women use sex to manipulate their man?

sivarias · 2019-01-12T12:10:13+00:00

It's clear that she likes teasing you. Where I think it gets manipulative is if she uses it in a more abusive manner. For example, if she won't put out unless you buy something or do something for her.

If it bothers you, you could call her out on it in a playful way. Say "nah I'm not gonna make out with you cos you're just teasing me aren't you?" Or something.

KikiYuyu · 2019-01-12T13:11:47+00:00

I think it's a well documented fact that humans in general have been using sex to manipulate others since forever. Obviously there are women who fall into that category, and it's all well documented.

If you're really having a problem, why not talk to her about it?

v3r1 · 2019-01-12T11:30:17+00:00

Only 99.9% of women. Most don't constantly do it but you best believe they know it's a weapon they carry and they can use it with no second thought

a_vanillae · 2019-01-12T13:58:32+00:00

Is she really manipulating you or is she playing what she thinks is a fun game with you?

Teasing can be fun in certain contexts. In my experience women like to be teased, it's part of foreplay for us. This could be another classic example of miscommunication by projection.

If it's driving you to the brink of insanity or whatever, you probably need to make it crystal clear to her you aren't enjoying it. But it kind of sounds like you don't really know what you want.

Sort it out in your own head and convey that. If she doesn't stop even though it's causing issues, drop her.

mazterblaztr · 2019-01-12T12:27:34+00:00

Really OP??

Are you that new??

For millions of years men used there bodies to build, take or earn what they want or need.

Women have used emotion to get what they want from men. Be them fathers, freinds or lovers.

It's only recently that women have been in a position to provide for completely for themselves.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2019-01-12T16:25:30+00:00

you dated a girl who made you wait weeks for sex and shes not a sexual dynamo?

get the fuck out of here!!! really?

Gravel_Roads · 2019-01-12T16:21:39+00:00

I use all kinds of things to “manipulate” my partner. Back massages, doing the dishes, vacuuming, running up the street to grab beer or weed... All you’re saying is “do women do things for their partner in exchange or their partner doing things for them?”

shonenhikada · 2019-01-12T14:18:33+00:00

Yes of course. Sex is used to control men and women often use it as a reward. In fact women commercialize on sex in form of escorting, pornography, camming, twitching and any facet in which giving out sexual favors/being sexy would yield monitory gain.

An artist by the name Luis Quil perfectly demonstrates women being perfectly aware of their control of sex:

http://iroon.com/irtn/assets/gheymeh_baademjoon_2874/album/718/13.jpg

TheBookOfSeil · 2019-01-12T11:27:34+00:00

Of course they do

[deleted] · 2019-01-12T16:17:39+00:00

Idk my gf is always down whenever and initiates more than I do.

Different people have different sex drives, but if sex is giving her all the power, you put too much value on sex. Stop being thirsty. If she doesn’t have a compatible sex drive, either talk about juror find another girlfriend.

gopher_glitz · 2019-01-12T15:15:41+00:00

Women seem to be very adaptive, mine doesn't use sex but guilt. I'm very susceptible to feeling guilt and she knows it but I actually don't feel she uses it to manipulate me enough to be a significant problem.

MGTOWtoday · 2019-01-12T16:20:22+00:00

Does a bear shit in the woods?

Barneysparky · 2019-01-12T18:04:18+00:00

Your girlfriend sounds like she is still flirty and teasey.

She likes sex a couple of times a week but shows you that she wants you everyday.

Is this something you like? If so you are compatible. If not you're not.

Did you want her to stop flirting and teasing once you'd had sex and just have sex everytime she shows interest in you? That's a recipe for her withholding affection, those flirts are affection.

When I was young, with a young guy he'd want sex everytime I touched him. That was uncomfortable for me, both physically and emotionally made me feel like all he wanted was sex. I kept up the first few weeks but ended up sore and chaffed.

He had great hair I loved playing with, he liked me playing with it, but I stopped randomly doing that because everytime meant I had to at least blow him. Duty sex is fine, but not all the time everytime.

From what you've written it sounds like she's mad in love with you but perhaps your sex drives aren't compatible right now. If you're anything like my 20 year old marriage it will be her turn to be a horn dog one day, in my marriage in our 40s the show was on the other foot, in our 50s we are on the same page.

Some of the advice you've gotten here I doubt is coming from a place of them getting sex twice a week from a woman in love with them.

Having said that 2 times a week is low for a guy in his 20s in a relationship. I believe both of you could be happy with a couple of loosely scheduled bjs?

Something for the two of you to talk about. May I suggest at a neutral time you say: Hay babe, I love how you tease me, but it's hard to take when I'm only blowing my load twice a week. I know I can masturbate and trust me you make me .. but I think if you're not feeling like having sex more then twice a week, a couple of times a week you could help a fellow out?

PsychedelicDoc · 2019-01-12T17:02:21+00:00

Men take advantage of the fact that women want more emotional long-term connection. He teases her by hinting about being a couple, but leaving her disappointed and frustrated by not giving her a promise of a future together. He's happy with going out on occasional dates, but she wants to live together. He seems to take pleasure in getting her all worked up by having her meet certain members of his family, leaving a toothbrush and change of clothes at his house, and by calling her pet names, knowing it makes her want to commit. It just makes her want more....which gives him all the power in the relationship.

Do men use commitment to manipulate women? Absolutely.

beachredwhine · 2019-01-12T14:35:44+00:00

Well sorry to break it to you bud but not all guys are weaklings who sit around kvetching about a cutie giving it up. Some guys just take the sex we want. So no I can't relate to your shared pathetic weakness at all.

But I bet that all sucks. Maybe ask your mom-girlfriend if it's OK for you to have more of teh sex?

realityfacts · 2019-01-12T11:36:15+00:00

Yes, and priming you to expect sex and then denying it is emotional abuse. You need to respect yourself and leave her. The whole basis for a straight man's association with a woman in the form of a relationship is sex, it is literally a result of our species having two sexes. If she is not putting out to your satisfaction you are being taken for a fool.

EsauTheRed · 2019-01-12T11:28:09+00:00

Yes, women leverage their sexual power, really this is their only power and women's supposed superiority at relationships and social skills are really just a result of this use of sexual power and leveraging their innate reproductive value rather than ability, skill, or technique

dicklord_airplane · 2019-01-12T13:48:47+00:00

That's just plain emotional abuse. Drop her before it gets worse.

MadDaniel · 2019-01-12T13:57:05+00:00

“No sex for a week”

[deleted] · 2019-01-12T16:49:14+00:00

coratoad · 2019-01-12T19:15:09+00:00

What did your girlfriend get from you in exchange for the possibility of sex?

UrbanVikingX · 2019-01-12T20:26:46+00:00

"This just makes me want it more, and she knows that...which gives her all the power in the relationship. "

Why do you interpret this as power?

I don't know if that's the right way to look at it. Yes, the general rule is that a man advances, and a woman accepts/recline.

It's just evolutionary biology at work. It's not a power game.

[deleted] · 2019-01-12T22:42:38+00:00

Withdraw attention. That's the power men have. In accordance with walking away of course.

SeemedGood · 2019-01-13T02:54:34+00:00

They do with men to whom they are not actually (read actively) sexually attracted. It has been my experience that they don’t do that if they are actually sexually attracted to you in large part because they want sex as much (and often more) than you.

That your girlfriend is doing this does not bode well for your “relationship” because it is indicative of two things:

That she isn’t actually sexually attracted to you, but instead is sexually permissive with you (ie she will have sex with you in exchange for some relationship utility that you provide her), and
That she views you as an object to manipulate sexually in exchange for that utility

Do what you will with that situation, but it’s not indicative of the type of woman with whom I would engage in a committed relationship.

Unfortunately, however, that behavior pattern isn’t unusual.

prostate-apostate · 2019-01-13T03:51:16+00:00

Sounds like a tease next time she does this , and stops without going all the way . Immediately start watching porn and jerk off with the volume set to maximum .

Eartherry · 2019-01-13T05:02:10+00:00

If she's using sex to manipulate you into something, what is it? Because if it's to get you to stay with her that's not going to work.

What you were saying about her changing in front of you, was it to tease you? If that wasn't her intention then she was just changing, she wasn't thinking about you at all.

I think that's the crux of the issue. Women don't think about men, they just live their lives. Some of those things men happen to find arousing. She still has to do them.

testpostignorepls · 2019-01-13T10:42:24+00:00

which gives her all the power in the relationship.

If ... sex is the only thing thats keeping your relation upright.

I want sex twice a week and my ... "plate" wants it twice a day, I literally can't handle that so I sometimes tease her for fun, not to manipulate her, just to get her horny and then back off.

benelijah · 2019-01-14T13:39:21+00:00

Really? You should have been willing to walk away in those first 6 weeks as soon as you saw she wasn't that hot for you.

Find someone that's actually attracted to you more and wants to fuck you. I sense a little bit of scarcity mentality here. All of my girlfriends were the ones to initiate sex more than me and I'm by no means above average in terms of attractiveness.

[deleted] · 2019-01-14T22:48:11+00:00

Yes, but more likely they use the possibility of sex to manipulate men way more even if they don’t have any intention of having sex with them.

aanarchist · 2019-01-15T04:23:41+00:00

Sounds like a compatibility issue because some dudes are into getting teased then denied until later. If she has a controlling disposition then yes she wants to feel that she has the power. If you like equality or to have the power yourself then you are not compatible with such a woman and will interpret her behavior as cruelty and taking advantage. If you don't like it then leave, you encourage her by staying as every time she denies you and you don't immediately check out of the relationship you are telling her "I like how things are and would like this to continue".

Teasing is fine for me now and then personally, but if she consistently refuses to satisfy me because she likes the power more than she does my happiness in the relationship, cya bitch.

p3n3lop3 · 2019-01-12T17:18:58+00:00

Ladies, unless you want to be a human fleshlight, WGTOW is the only way to go.

Tedesche · 2019-01-12T20:05:48+00:00

Toxic femininity.

peterlongc · 2019-01-12T11:37:13+00:00

Yeah. But if you can give them great sex then you can turn the tables and manipulate them.. If you're into that

[deleted] · 2019-01-12T14:36:10+00:00

of course they do

guess what it's the only power they have over men and they owe men their day to day survival

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hostility_kitty · 2019-01-12T18:15:20+00:00

Not when she’s the one who has a higher sex drive. Just take a look at that dead bedrooms subreddit

HossMcDank · 2019-01-13T03:58:01+00:00

In the same way men used to manipulate women with financial security, yes. When one party has something the other wants, and cannot obtain without them, it requires a level of restraint not to abuse that power.

gasparddelanuit · 2019-01-12T18:08:34+00:00

Do women use sex to manipulate their man?

Yes.

[deleted] · 2019-01-12T20:30:32+00:00

yes it happens, i dont try to fall for girls no more until a couple of dates if i can even land one. its rare to meet a young women who doesn't use men, dont trust most north american girls, be smart and patiences will reward you

darksoldierk · 2019-01-12T22:03:39+00:00

Cheat on her, or find someone else. Look, Ttwice a week vs twice a day is a huge discrepancy man, and if she's not willing to compromise, but instead, chooses to use this discrepancy as a weapon, then the longer that this relationship lasts, the more she will leverage this or other things against you.

I've been in a relationship like that, my rule was initiate, if she say no, go to the FWB. Funny how she never noticed the pattern of how every night that she said "no", the next night I would get home very late.

[deleted] · 2019-01-12T19:48:40+00:00

Wow you waited 6 weeks for sex and now only get it twice a week? I'm sorry to tell you but you absolutely sound like a beta. If she's not eager to have sex with you 6-7 times a week minimum, then she's not actually attracted to you physically. It's the hard truth.

wtffellification · 2019-01-13T08:28:39+00:00

All tease and no play makes Dave a dull boy

Title	Do women use sex to manipulate their man?
Author	DynamoDave79
Upvotes	54
Comments	153
Date	January 12, 2019 11:07 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/af6g3w/do_women_use_sex_to_manipulate_their_man/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-women-use-sex-to-manipulate-their-man.257869 https://theredarchive.com/post/257869