How men and women compare financially post-divorce

Divorce is once again the topic du jour so I wanted to do a quick post inspired by some of the RP comments in the other thread:

"Maybe the reason women initiate divorce more than men is as simple as women fair better after the divorce than men do?"

"Women initiate divorces from men more because they will get the kids, and half of the shit they didn't work for, in the divorce."

"I think you're over complicating the topic because the simple fact is divorce rate is high and mostly initiated by women because women lose nothing, if anything they will only gain from a divorce, single mothers have huge social support etc"

It's a common and widely perpetuated belief among RPers and the manoshphere in general that divorce is skewed in favor of women financially, forcing men to practically go broke trying to finance their ex-wives and children. Stories about women divorcing and living lavishly off alimony, child support or other settlements are common and form the backbone of TRP's "don't get married" rhetoric.

"Divorce. Live off his beta bux until you can find another provider. Literally NOTHING to lose." source

"Marriage largely restricts your ability to apply dread. Even if you're vastly ahead of her in terms of SMV. A divorce isn't the worst thing for a woman. She gets cash and prizes, the kids, and there's no longer any real social stigma for it." source

"End point, never get married. There are no unicorns, the laws are designed to fuck you and reward her. You're not special, it will happen to you as easy as he and I." source

There are many avenues of discussion when it comes to divorce such as fault/no fault, custody arrangements, initiation of divorce and much more but the focus of this post is on how men and women do financially after a divorce and comparing that to the RP rhetoric.

And btw, there have been some great posts in the past covering prenups and women's larger role in care-taking and career sacrifice in marriage that are worth checking out too, the takeaway being:

Prenuptial agreements will vary by state law, but in general, are overturned on the basis of fraud/misrepresentation, procedural unfairness, and under limited public policy grounds like leaving an ex destitute under circumstances not foreseen by the parties. They are not thrown out willy-nilly, and they are not worthless, particularly if you include a severability clause and make sure to comply with your state’s factors for ensuring procedural fairness. Also, the case law is a little scattered on duress via presenting your prenup to your fiancee right before the wedding, some courts seem to think it’s fine to present it right before, others find duress if it’s 20 days before but she’s frantically running around doing wedding plans, it’s very fact-specific, I wouldn’t take the chance, the key seems to be “reasonable opportunity to consult with independent counsel.” ABOVE ALL GET A LAWYER.

So what do cold hard facts say about men and women after divorce? Do women really make off like bandits with "half the shit, cash and prizes" leaving men to scrape by with next to nothing?

According to the latest version of Custodial Mothers and Fathers and Their Child Support (2013):

• An estimated 13.4 million parents lived with 22.1 million children under 21 years of age while the other parent(s) lived somewhere else.

• One of every six custodial parents (17.5 percent) were fathers.

• The proportion of custodial mothers with income below poverty (31.2 percent) was higher than that of custodial fathers (17.4 percent)

• About half (48.7 percent) of all custodial parents had either legal or informal child support agreements, and custodial mothers were more likely to have agreements (52.3 percent) than custodial fathers (31.4 percent).

• About three-quarters (74.1 percent) of custodial parents who were due child support in 2013 received either full or partial payments and less than half (45.6 percent) received full payments.

• The aggregate amount of child support due in 2013 was $32.9 billion, a decrease of $14.0 billion from a decade earlier, when adjusted to 2013 dollars.

• About 68.5 percent of the $32.9 billion in child support due in 2013 was reported as received, averaging $3,950 per year per custodial parent who was due support.

To sum up there are less child support arrangements than a decade ago, about half of custodial parents are even supposed to get child support and even fewer actually receive those payments.

Besides child support, how else do men and women fare financially?

"A study of family breakdown by Professor Mike Brewer and Dr Alita Nandi at the Institute for Social and Economic Research at the University of Essex, funded by the Nuffield Foundation, has found that women and children suffer most when couples split."

“Women continue to see living standards fall by more after separation than men, especially when children are involved, but even for couples with no children. Mothers and children from high-income families see especially large drops in living standards, because the loss of the man’s earnings is in no way compensated for by higher income from alimony, child maintenance, benefits and tax credits, and having fewer mouths to feed.”

An even more striking finding, although one affecting fewer individuals, is the gender gap in living standards after separation of men and women from couples with grown-up children: these women, who are mostly aged over 50 and tend to have been married, see living standards fall by far more, on average, after separation, than their former partners, and almost a third fall into relative poverty.

The study supports previous findings showing that some individuals (mostly men, and mostly from previously low-income couples) see little impact in their household net income around separation because, post-separation, they move in with other adults (but not as husband and wife).

"Male incomes rise by a third after a split, while women are worse off and can struggle for years" article and study - Marital splits and income changes over the longer term

Divorce makes men - and particularly fathers - significantly richer. When a father separates from the mother of his children, according to new research, his available income increases by around one third. Women, in contrast, suffer severe financial penalties. Regardless of whether she has children, the average woman's income falls by more than a fifth and remains low for many years.

The research was carried out by Professor Stephen Jenkins, a director of the Institute for Social and Economic Research and chair of the Council of the International Association for Research on Income and Wealth.

Jenkins combined data from 14 different British Household Panel Surveys over 1991 to 2004 with the findings from five European surveys. Recalculating the results using the formula by which the government measures poverty, he established new per capita incomes. Jenkins found that the positive effect on men's finances is so significant that divorce can even lift them out of poverty, while women are far more likely to be plunged into destitution. Separated women have a poverty rate of 27% - almost three times that of their former husbands.

Maintenance paid by former partners also has little impact, said Jenkins, as just 31% of separated mothers receive payment from the father of their children.

"There are only two factors that have an impact on women's financial position, post relationship breakdown," said Jenkins. "The percentage change in income is less if they have worked beforehand and continue working afterwards. The impact is also reduced if they start working after the relationship breakdown. There is also a potential positive impact if she remarries," he added, "although the impact is a small one."

Men can find themselves financially disadvantaged in certain circumstances, however:

The position can be reversed if a separated man has more children with a new partner while paying maintenance to his first family.

There's some good news too, this effect can be mitigated if women are able to keep working and retain marketable job skills throughout, however

The only way to level the playing field is to make men and women more alike in terms of roles in the family and in the labour market. "Until these fundamental issues change, these realities will remain essentially unchanged," he said.

Meaning the expectation that women be the primary caregivers, sacrifice more of their careers and prime-earning years to care for children can make women particularly financially vulnerable after divorce.

So what does PPD think, does this information support or detract from TRP's insistence that women are financially much better off after divorce than men, that they have everything to gain and nothing to lose?