This post will be scatterbrained, so I ask that you bare with me as I explore my opinions of current gender-roles in society.

As I peruse this subreddit, I see a lot of misogyny. Now, I see this as a well earned defense mechanism, but I still deem it as unhealthy; let me explain:

I think that misogyny is unhealthy and treating women as less than people is abhorrent, however, I also agree that many women don’t deserve much more than a second chance and then being treated as less than people if they refuse to change their patterns of behavior (note that I think the same way of men). I have met a lot of women in my life, and all have inspired me to take the views I have of women. The only woman in my life that hasn’t tried to manipulate me in some way, and has always been honest with me, is my mother.

The other day I was talking about casual sex with my mother and how, with my disorder, I think that it is the only route that I can take. I am diagnosed with ASPD and Bipolar I disorder: rapid cycling. Specifically, I’m a “Psychopathic Deviant with Narcissistic Tendencies.” I think that this gives me an edge above most men in this subreddit that have to adopt a new ideology for self-betterment. Most men have to learn how to be healthily self-centered and pursue advancement of themselves without motivation of the opposite sex. That comes naturally for me, which is why I think I have a head-start.

Getting back to the conversation with my mother, she was rather appalled and disappointed that I would say such a thing. She believed that, in itself, it is a reflection of her parenting, how she failed, and how my views were distorted by the few, and how I needed to search for the proper women among the many. As much as I tried to explain that it wasn’t a fault of parenting, rather a fault of the women in my experiences, she was still rather upset. The reason I say that casual sex may be my only option is because of my strong withdrawal of emotion, empathy, sympathy, remorse, and other things that would be considered necessary for a healthy relationship (as defined by our current culture).

It’s difficult for me to say that I ‘like’ women when my only experience with them has been abundantly negative. I understand that I have to take into account individualism versus commonality, but something that I have to constantly remind women on reddit is that most of them are the ‘ideal woman’ with liberal ideas. Every woman is different, but the overwhelming majority of women on reddit is liberal and fun-loving versus my experience: more selfish and conservative. It seems they understand that women can be awful, but they refuse to believe that they occupy the loud minority over the quiet majority. I’m giving the benefit of the doubt when I say that ‘good’ women are the silent majority (good being defined as the ideal for an egalitarian society). My only experiences with women have been negative, and I have had many experiences in many different demographics.

Here is where the hate will be bestowed upon me:

I don’t blame women for their misandristic patterns in society. I’m going to bring a not-so-delicate example into the context that is an extreme. As children were being raised in Nazi-Germany, they were raised to be xenophobes and, specifically, hate those of Jewish belief/those of Jewish descent. You can’t blame the children for hating someone that they were raised and constantly reinforced by society to hate.

How that relates to women in our current culture is that, from the time they are in the home to the time that they are in school, and to the time that they become functioning members of society, the idea of them being of a higher standard than men has been so drilled into their head that it would be unfair for any of us to expect something different. The parents of the girls are at no greater fault either, since they are just regurgitating the things they were taught as children. You may argue that women have mental faculties of their own and they can differentiate what is healthy versus what is misandry. Again, I will bring the extreme example that those who were raised to hate Jews are not at fault. Unless you were able to fully adopt the role of a Jew in Nazi-Germany, how could one possibly understand that what they were doing was wrong? Men are being viewed like animals just as the Jews were in the mid 20th century. I will bring a personal example of this from my own past, this extends back to my first year in high school.

Everyone was taken to a seminar that was for women to protect themselves from men. Seriously, protect themselves from men. In this seminar, the idea that men were animals was constantly reiterated (using different verbiage, of course) and how women must defend themselves against the bane of society: men. Shit-examples such as 'men think about sex every seven seconds' were used. Fucking ridiculous. This idea isn't a new one, either. I urge you to do some quick research on “True Womanhood of the 18th, 19th, and 20th Century.” It is the idea that, once again, men are animals and women are a beacon of purity.

As I was sitting in the seminar, I was internally muttering to myself that men are not the only ones able to commit atrocities on the opposite gender, and how it will be this sexist view perpetuated through generations that will lead to unhealthy upbringing of another generation. Seeing the women nodding their heads made me uncomfortable. The only thing that brought me back from from subtle rage was seeing other men crossing their arms with a bewildered look on their face.

Once again, I urge that all of us take into account that women are individuals, even though the vast majority (from what we experience) are under the assumption that they are better than men, in at least a few facets of being a human.

I would like to have seen a class explaining that women are just as capable of manipulation and emotional degradation as men were physically devastating.

I think Bill Burr said it best when women pick and choose which part of male culture they would like to inherit. I think that there are just as many cases in which hitting a woman would be acceptable as hitting a man. To say that women are fundamentally weaker than men excuses them of being a total cunt without physical repercussion. Shouldn’t it also be viewed that a body-builder hitting a spindly guy would result in the same kind of punishment and social banishment as a man hitting a woman? Absolutely not. I’m sure if you asked a direct question using that example, most people would agree that it should be met with the same amount of punishment. However, if you remove the specifics of situations and look at it as a whole, women will always get the upper hand (pun not intended).

It goes without saying that, in the legal system, women are at a distinct advantage, so I will not go into detail of that subject. However, I would like to bring up something else: how men tend to occupy higher-wage jobs and how they are more likely to become leaders.

The simple answer is this: testosterone. It is the motivation hormone. It is the risk-taking hormone. It is the ‘get shit done’ hormone. It is because of testosterone that men are more likely to occupy jobs such as CEOs, division managers, or other places of leadership. Men and women have both estrogen and testosterone, but (obviously) in different quantities (and in different number of hormone receptors for each). You will rarely see women who occupy the same job as men being paid less than them. Saying to men that women, on average, make less than men is insulting to our intelligence. They assume that we will take those statistics for what they are without doing research. As society is becoming to understand, men aren’t fucking retarded.

The reason women, on average, are paid less than men is because they tend to occupy more of the lower-wage jobs...not because they are being paid less for the same job. Women, at least on the surface, are not required to hold the same bread-winning jobs that men do, because the men already occupy them and women can rely on the men to hold them. Men have absolutely no help from society if they fall on hard times. Men more highly occupy the upper echelon of society just as they do the lower:

Men\tWomen\tTop of Society 75%\t25%\t\t41st Canadian Parliament (2011) [1] 81%\t19%\t\t113th United States Congress (2013) [2] 83%\t17%\t\tCorporation Board Seats (USA, 2013) [3] 95%\t5%\t\tFortune 500 CEOs [4]  Men\tWomen\tBottom of Society 70%\t30%\t\tHomeless Population (Canada) [5] 77%\t23%\t\tHomicide Victimization (USA, 2010) [6] 92%\t8% \t\tWorkplace Deaths (USA, 2012) [7] 95%\t5%\t\tPrison Population (England & Wales, 2013) [8]  [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women_in_the_41st_Canadian_Parliament [2] http://www.cawp.rutgers.edu/fast_facts/levels_of_office/documents/cong.pdf [3] http://www.cnbc.com/id/101445151 [4] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_women_CEOs_of_Fortune_500_companies [5] http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/giving/should-universities-be-opening-mens-centres/article4436249/ [6] http://www.fbi.gov/about-us/cjis/ucr/crime-in-the-u.s/2010/crime-in-the-u.s.-2010/tables/10shrtbl02.xls [7] http://www.bls.gov/iif/oshwc/cfoi/cfch0011.pdf [8] www.parliament.uk/briefing-papers/SN04334.pdf

It is because women have such a safety-net, as well as willful reliance on men, that they can also take a sigh of relief while occupying lower-wage jobs, where men are under higher stress.

I have great respect for women that go against the grain of society. It fills me with joy to see that women are taking hold of their own lives, occupying the same jobs as men, and becoming independent members of the world. If they do this while treating men with as much respect as women, I swoon like a little boy.

Let us not forget that it wasn't too long ago that women could be legally beaten by their husbands, that they couldn't occupy the workforce, that they couldn't vote, that the couldn't hold office, that they had the lower hand of divorce, and were generally less respected. They weren't able to get an education, and they were trained only to be a housewife regardless of their own ambitions.

TL:DR

Don’t blame all women for the faults of what we experience. Also, don’t blame the women that are awful, but don’t forgive them. It isn’t their fault that they are raised to so negatively treat men.