708,624 posts

No Sexual Attraction in Marriage

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September 30, 2019
10 upvotes

Hey guys,

Cross-posting this from AskTRP as was advised this would be a better forum. So this is very similar to what I posted over there.

I'm a lurker, have read the side-bar but still internalizing it. There is a lot to digest.

I'm not going to write a long-ass paragraph, so I'll summarize.

Married 10 years (early 40's), no kids. Wife is kind, supportive, caring, pretty... but I'm no longer sexually attracted to her. Its probably the cliched "I love her but am not in love with her" schtick... though mentioning 'love' here is probably frowned upon. There was attraction at the start, but it just faded regardless of what I tried. I find it hard to keep it up during.

My testosterone is fine, I'm horny as fuck - just not for her - even though she is pretty. I guess we've been together 'too long' (for me at least). There are women in work that I have rock hard erections for, but don't intend to act on it. I say this more as an indication that I absolutely want to fuck other women. Watch porn/fap every few days to release the pressure.

She is still very much into me. This crushes me (beta right...) and the thought of leaving crushes me because it will crush her. Clearly I'm emotional about this so need some 3rd party unbiased,clinical and amoral advice (and a kick up the ass). My head and my dick say leave, but my emotions are all "don't crush her bro, she's a great person".

Will continue to read the side-bar of course.

EDIT: I mentioned this a few times below so will put it here. After considering my thoughts some more, the truth is that I've made the decision to leave and the guilt is killing me. I've read the Dark Triad theory and it says that, for example, that psychopathy is beyond our control. The level to which you can be is hard-wired and the only thing you can do is simulate it and live with the consequences. I am an overly empathetic guy, so the question is - can someone point me to some material whereby I can learn to deal with this emotional bullshit.

UPDATE: I've left her last night. I realised that whatever guilt I have will pass and I'm feeding my ego to think she won't move on and that its selfish at best to continue to drag it out. I'll give myself some time to process my thoughts and emotions, throw myself some more into my business. Continue to read the material.

Also, some of ya'll seem to love the word faggot. You need to come out of the closet and let the anger go, you've swallowed the red pill but seem to long to swallow something else. Some serious insecurity goin' on.

For those that gave genuine advice/guidance - I appreciate it! Best of luck on your mission. As I read and apply more, I will try and contribute.


Post Information
Title No Sexual Attraction in Marriage
Author RelationshipSOS2019
Upvotes 10
Comments 94
Date 30 September 2019 06:23 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/287064
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/dbftt7/no_sexual_attraction_in_marriage/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
betatestosteronethe red pill
Comments

[–]go-RED-go20 points21 points  (14 children) | Copy

You say she's pretty and that she's into you and you are horny as fuck but you would still rather jerk off at porn like some teenager loser then make effort to fuck your wife (or make effort to fuck another woman at work)?

Doesnt make sense to me. Seems like youre lazy faggot or/and scared pussy.

Why don't you divorce then? What's stopping you, you have no children.

You are scared of hurting her? Bulshit. Dont kid yourself buddy. Yes, she probably would be hurting for a while, until she finds a new man, the one that can fuck her good, making her totally forget that your sorry ass even exist.

[–]hack3geRed Beret10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy

Haha faggot thinks his wife won’t forget about him because he’s so amazing. He hasn’t swallowed shit - he’s not a man capable of alpha widowing a woman.

If he had half a clue he would realize she would light switch their entire relationship and if he had read war brides he’d realize just how quickly she would move on.

His issue is that he’s not attractive enough for the wife to put in the work to make him want to fuck her or she’s actually a land whale and he’s burying the lead.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

war brides

My single source of Red Pill PTSD.

[–]hack3geRed Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah that fucker is an eye opener - the hardest part to digest is that from an evolutionary perspective it makes perfect sense.

When two alpha male animals fight for control of a group the females immediately fuck the winner and bond with him and the loser is completely forgotten.

No fucking way you are overcoming hundreds of thousands of years of programming.

[–]i-am-the-prize3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

yup, remember that / r / relationships post about the chick who is hot for / masturbating to the dude who knocked out her fiance' ?

eye.opening.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

OP flattering himself. If she wanted him, she’d do stuff to make him want her. She problably dresses in old t-shirts around the house. My wife usually wears a nighty... does little sexy things to make me want her so, I fuck her several times a week.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] -4 points-3 points  (5 children) | Copy

Thats not how sexual attraction works bro. You're saying that if a whale did everything you wanted that'd make you want her? Just read it back, its clear bullshit. I'm not saying my wife is a whale though, I'm saying my tastes have changed so the principle is the same. Some people like brunettes, some like blondes, some like big tits, some like big asses. As my SMV rose, I felt I could do better.

[–]SeamusAwl3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

You sound more like a guy who learned a new super power and wants to see what he can do with it. Which isnt what u/BobbyPeru was talking about. He said you are not attractive enough for your wife to put any effort into looking good for you.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

So you're hypothetically saying that if I decided I wanted to fuck women with big tits, my wife would naturally want to keep me interested and get implants? What if I don't like fake tits? Or I decided I liked crossfit women that my wife would put in years at the gym and I would stand about and wait for her body type to align with my desires?

I'm sorry, downvote away but the logic is flawed. I get what you're saying, but it doesn't apply 100% of the time (like anything in life).

[–]SeamusAwl0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No. It means she would spend more time doing hair and makeup, actually diet, get sexy lingerie and beg you to slap her ass and pull her hair. That is the kind of effort talked about. It doesnt mean your wife would dye her hair brown and artificially inflate her egos if you like busty brunettes. Only a crazy low quality woman would do the latter.

[–]BarracudaRP2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Since you're reading the sidebar, you'll know what I mean when I say you're DEERing

You are missing the point my dude.

Also, some of ya'll seem to love the word faggot. You need to come out of the closet and let the anger go, you've swallowed the red pill but seem to long to swallow something else. Some serious insecurity goin' on.

LOL Faggot

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Since you're reading the sidebar, you'll know what I mean when I say you're DEERing

You're probably onto something there. Thanks.

> LOL Faggot

See you at Gay Pride? 👍

I appreciate the effort of the capital 'F' btw.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

then make effort to fuck your wife

Why would I 'make the effort' in this case?

I'll make efforts to better myself, my body, my business - no pain no gain. If I feel like its an effort to fuck, I'm not gonna do it. I'd rather find someone that its effortless to fuck - other than the exercise.

I want to leave, its the guilt thats been stopping me.

[–]Hobbitrabbit3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

You sound fucking lazy. Either leave and get it over with and quit bitching about how bad it'll make you feel, or put in some goddamn work to make yourself feel good about fucking your wife if you actually care about your current marriage. Two roads.

I very rarely don't feel like fucking my wife even when she wants me to. Know why? Because I have a little voice in the back of my head that tells me it won't be as good as I want anyway so why try or some bullshit. I tell that voice to fuck off and I rail her anyway because sex is good for me, my wife, and our marriage and I like that.

You want actual sex that's as convenient and easy as porn. Effortless? Not a real thing. Go fuck a new woman every night for all I care, fully doable, but it's not as convenient as doing a Google search.

Maybe you're making excuses. Maybe you're lying about her being hot. Maybe you've watched so much porn your standards are fucked up and you only get off to people who aren't your wife because that's how you've programmed it. I don't know.

Sort your shit.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You want actual sex that's as convenient and easy as porn. Effortless? Not a real thing.

This is horseshit, I've had plenty of sex pre-marriage. I know how effortless it can be and how effortless it was at the start.

> Maybe you're lying about her being hot.

I didn't say she was hot, I said she was pretty.

> Sort your shit.

Agreed.

[–]ibelieveican198212 points13 points  (5 children) | Copy

Stop watching porn and fapping you fucking idiot. All your problems stem from that.

EDIT:

Wanted to add this little blurb here from u/helaughsinhidden . Resonated well with me. Hopefully you will get something out of it as well -

Personally, when I look at porn, I can't even go to a gas station without starting at every woman's butt, crotch, and cleavage and at the very least ponder if I like them. I'll catch myself looking to see if they are looking back at me and if they do, hoping they smile.

The other thing that drives the desire is our insecurity. We all have that burning question in our minds; "Am I man enough?". We seek validation in many forms to test it too. Sports, hunting, fighting, business accolades, victory in battles.... but nothing does the job quite like a sexual conquest of gaming, escalating, isolating, and having sex with a new attractive woman.

Porn artificially gives that validation. It's why men look at her eyes and body language and why they stare longingly at the camera. That's what gives us the dopamine response. Oddly enough, it actually increases insecurity in a man and increases his desire for more validation. Comparing the kind of female attention, submission, openness, enthusiasm, to what you actually receive in real life can be depressing. It makes you envious because what that the man is receiving in the video looks absolutely amazing.

This all comes to a melt down when our insecurity, jealousy, shame, guilt, and feelings of inadequacy ultimately make us very unattractive to our actual wives. Even more so if they suspect porn or find it out. Then we get starfish or a deadbedroom which makes those negative feelings even worse. It is what's called a negative feedback loop, like placing a screeching microphone in front of a speaker.

Break the cycle. Stop looking at porn. Maybe fast from useless internet activity, social media, video games, or even from food at the same time to help give you strength. I fasted from food to break it off. When I felt tempted, I actually thought to myself "if I was going to cheat on anything, I'd rather cheat by going to Taco Bell!!". The pull to view porn used to be extremely strong, but when fasting I could barely tell. I broke fast after 3 days and literally hated the thought of looking at porn for a long time.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I don't think they stem from it, but it ain't helping. Will cut it out. Appreciate the response.

[–]ibelieveican19822 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Try it. This is just like when an alcoholic tries to rationalize that his drinking is not the cause of all of his problems. Everyone outside can see what the issue is. Just note how many comments in here are telling you to cut out the porn.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Heard loud and clear. Thanks.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hit the sidebar faggot.

I stopped fapping to porn 3 yrs ago. That is probably a big part of the problem like others are saying. Also, you have to do things to spice up the bedroom. Read sex god method since you obviously haven’t read any sidebar yet

[–]mrpalt1Chief of the Towel Police0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

straight punch to the mouth

[–]part_wolf11 points12 points  (8 children) | Copy

Okay, so what's your question?

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker4 points5 points  (7 children) | Copy

Should he crush her or not?

[–]part_wolf3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

The fact that he couldn't even formulate the question speaks volumes. How do you direct someone who is directionless?

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

To the sidebar

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I have direction, I'm just struggling with the guilt of crushing someone as I go in that direction.

I mentioned elsewhere and editing the original post.

"The reason for the post is the guilt of the decision I've already made and my trying to reconcile it - which after reading theory of the Dark Triad is how my brain is wired and not changable."

[–]part_wolf1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

A little bit of psychology can be a very dangerous thing. It seems like you don't have a strong enough frame to be able to make the decision to leave your wife and be content with yourself. Perhaps this is cognitive dissonance and you do love your wife, but she doesn't do the freaky shit from the porn videos so you've rationalized not being attracted to her. Maybe I'm way off base and you're a rock solid captain who's just struggling with a tough decision.

Regardless of my analysis, if you crush her there's no going back. You may want to proceed carefully.

How about this: look in the mirror and say, "I want to divorce my wife of ten years." Write down how you feel about that statement. Describe every single feeling. Then, get to work on understanding those feelings and why they are there. Work diligently on improving yourself and your frame, and after ten months (one for every year of your marriage) you'll know if you can move forward with a divorce confidently and happily, knowing that it's the right decision for you.

You might still want some advice at that point, but you won't need our help to make a decision.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I guess the real question is, how normal is it to feel massive guilt over this kinda thing and how does one get over it.

[–]part_wolf1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

The answer is the same as ever: hit the sidebar. Figure out your mission. Strengthen your frame. Do the work.

The fact that you're writing off your own feelings as "emotional bullshit" is evidence that you don't have the tools to process what you're feeling in a healthy way. Process that guilt properly so you can move forward knowing that you're doing what's best for you, whatever that decision ends up being.

Also, stop jerking off so much like a fucking loser.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I appreciate your thought out advice, its why I posted. Thanks.

[–]SkimTheDross11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Watch porn/fab every few days to release the pressure

You can it as if this is a result or side effect of your attraction dilemma.

Perhaps you just stumbled upon the cause.

[–]mrbadassmotherfucker8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

Bro! I was exactly like this for years! Years!!

I always wanted to smash other women, wasn't even that attracted to my wife anymore and didn't really care if I stayed with her or not, but I didn't wanna crush her emotionally. I almost left a number of times, but my kids kept me there...

Do you know what I realised by finding red pill... I wasn't unattracted to her, not at all... I was unattracted to myself and the beta faggot I had become. The day I found red pill, and this is no word of a lie, I did a bunch of reading all day and realised what I had become. I was very quickly attracted to her again, because I realised she had actually become more attractive than me!

Now Im hard for her all the time and she's starting to give me what I want in return.

It's like a fucking miracle this place...

I'm not saying this is the answer for you, but just wanna throw the possibility out there that maybe youre actually unattracted to yourself. If your energy is low, you can't feel attractive. Maybe thoge girls at work seem attractive because they are more out of reach. When your wife offers it on a plate and there's no chase, it's game over cos it's no fun anymore...

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

When your wife offers it on a plate and there's no chase, it's game over cos it's no fun anymore...

I do miss the chase and the reward for sure.

[–]Balls_Wellington_3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

I find it hard to believe that you have absolutely zero reason for not finding her attractive.

If tomorrow you met a girl that looked and acted just like her, do you think you'd be attracted to her just because she is new?

Or would you be hoping she is more adventurous/fit/fun/slutty? Would you prefer she is a different body type?

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Different body type tbh. As I improved myself, my tastes changed.

[–]Balls_Wellington_0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's important to be honest with yourself if you are going to master yourself.

You can feed her lines about how she's pretty but you just aren't the same, but in your own mind you should be able to say "she's chubby and I hate it" or whatever your issue is. If stating it so bluntly makes you feel shitty, answer honestly about why that is-maybe you think it is a shallow reason, or feel bad because it is something she can't change.

Then you can make the call you want, informed and honest to yourself.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red4 points5 points  (7 children) | Copy

No kids?

Bottom line is that you cant be zero on Monday and balls deep by Friday.

If you could, you would.

You are unattractive.

GTFO and work. No one here can fix it.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

I lift regularly. I think its the self improvement thats raised my standards above what my wife can offer, she is pretty - but she doesn't do it for me anymore because I want prettier. I get offers from the girls in work that feed my ego.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy

Well faggot. Everyone here agrees that shitting where you eat is an excellent idea. So go for it.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Well faggot. Everyone here agrees that shitting where you eat is an excellent idea. So go for it.

To quote the original post: "There are women in work that I have rock hard erections for, but don't intend to act on it."

The point being, that I have options - I work out, I'm a high earner, I can do whatever I want. The guilt is the core issue, which brings it back to my 'Dark Triad' edit.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

Listen you faggot fuck.

Dont sit there and tell me you have "options" because the women you work with are FORCED to interact with you.

That doesn't mean they want to fuck you.

And even if they DID, you stating you WILL NOT eliminates those options completely.

If you had fucking options you would be talking to us about the THOTS you are hitting up at Starbucks, Whole Foods and other places where women would talk to you because they WANT to.

Not because you owe them TPS reports.

Go fucking lift something.

[–]WolfofAllStreetz1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I always enjoy reds posts.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

LOL /thread

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I like your energy, but you're gonna pop an artery if you don't reduce your tren dosage.

[–]SelectAirline2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

My head and my dick say leave, but my emotions are all "don't crush her bro, she's a great person".

Do you normally make potentially life altering decisions based upon emotions and pity for others?

Assuming that you're actually telling us everything, it seems like this is an easy choice and you're just looking to unload the decision onto someone else so that you don't have to be the bad guy.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

it seems like this is an easy choice and you're just looking to unload the decision onto someone else so that you don't have to be the bad guy

This is partially true, because then I could offload the guilt. As I mentioned in another comment and edited the original post.

"The reason for the post is the guilt of the decision I've already made and my trying to reconcile it - which after reading theory of the Dark Triad is how my brain is wired and not changable."

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Someone is too conflict averse to make a decision?

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Accurate, whats the best material to overcome that (obviously reading the side-bar included).

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

There are no magic words to getting balls. Most guys get into a point where they are willing to burn shit to the ground rather than continue.

Ask your wife to cheat on you with a dude while doing that thing she never does with you, that usually works

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Most guys get into a point where they are willing to burn shit to the ground rather than continue.

I like that.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You shouldn't, it's like putting your rabid dog down. you take no pleasure but it has to be done

[–]Cam_Winston21[🍰] 4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

This is fake.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

What is it about it that you think is fake? If I were theoretically a troll, whats the secret objective? I'm a dude new to, but reading up, on TRP. I have guilt issues and am seeking advice on managing that guilt.

[–]Cam_Winston21[🍰] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

A man in his 40s who, after dropping RP phrases throughout after posting from a new account and at first even on the wrong sub, says he watches porn and faps every few days, doesn't get hard-ons by simply looking at women at work. Male physiology doesn't work like that. The more porn/fapping the more the brain needs stimulation in order to get an erection, especially the older he gets.

If you were a 15 year old virgin, yeah. Or, I suppose you could be a sociopath. Or, you could be a longtime reader who created a new account & who simply got the basics about males wrong. But, probably not.

You're a chick. This is fake.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

> Doesn't get hard-ons by simply looking at women at work.

If your test ("testosterone" if you're as dumb as you're coming across) is high, yes you can you fucking dumbass. Not that its just looking at the women in work, its the flirting and thinking about it. The guilt about wanting to leave (a new conclusion) is what's destroying the attraction.

> Male physiology doesn't work like that. The more porn/fapping the more the brain needs stimulation in order to get an erection, especially the older he gets.

Because your study size of n = 1 and some internet reading has given you complete insight into male psychology? Watching porn to fap a couple of times a week is definitely not ideal and I'll cut it, but its not like I'm watching porn multiple times a day.

> Or, I suppose you could be a sociopath.

My issue is excess empathy, do you even know what that word means? This is some low-IQ horseshit.

[–]Iammrp21 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

have read the sidebar

No you haven't. This is straight out of NMMNG. On average it takes a nice guy 8 months to break up with someone. You're probably extra nice and married her because you didn't want to hurt her feelings.

Do whatever the fuck you want. No one cares. Want to jerk off to porn? Go for it. Want to fuck chicks at work? Do it. Want to complain about your fat wife to internet strangers? Get the fuck out. All you're doing here is complaining. You're not doing any work. You're a faggot. Do something you fucking loser. And do it because you want it. Not because you're considering your wife's feelings.

Do whatever the fuck you want to do. Just don't expect me to care.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] -1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy

I'm doing lots of stuff but I'm not going to put business growth strategies and test-cycles into this post.

> Just don't expect me to care.

Why would I?

[–]Iammrp21 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Lmao. Proof you have done no work.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

This is some low effort wank. Why do you even reply on AskMRP?

[–]Iammrp20 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Faggot

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's OK to be gay son, it's 2019. Stop projecting, let go of your anger.

[–]Compeliminator1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

https://blackdragonblog.com/2019/08/19/sexual-boredom-with-long-term-partners/ heres a good article from black dragon on this subject. i felt like that with my now ex gf of 4 yrs. she turned me off with her shitty attitude though.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks, it's a good read. Though it ignores the fact that 'Paul' in this scenario, can change as a person and his needs can change. In my case, my wife is acting like she did at the start, but I have changed. My needs, preferences etc.

[–]WolfofAllStreetz1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Stop quoting Dark Triad shit, you ain’t Pat Bateman.

You want to go, go. If you are bored now what is going to make it better?

There are ways to fuck other women while married and your wife doesn’t care. Requires a level of value you don’t have.

Id write more but have to return some video tapes.

[–]Bedtimeshine1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I think a lot of it has to do with how attractive you think you are. Ever since I’ve built a muscular physique I’m attracted to more women.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is one part of 'the problem'. As I've grown my career, lifted, learned languages and such - my SMV went up and I felt I could do better. This played into the guilt, which then killed the attraction (or strongly contributed at least).

[–]JameisBong1 point2 points  (13 children) | Copy

Stop watching porn immediately. Try fucking an escort,if your feelings are the same then you are probably the common denominator. Nobody looses attraction for a pretty wife unless she became a fatty.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (12 children) | Copy

> Nobody looses attraction for a pretty wife unless she became a fatty.

I don't believe that at all.

"Show me a beautiful woman, I'll show you a man who's tired of fucking her"

[–]coinbaserep3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

I’ve been fucking my beautiful wife for 18 years. I’m 37

She’s had my 2 kids and still stands at 5’4 120lbs. Fucks me like a porn star and have sex 5-7 times a week. More if I really wanted.

What’s your excuse really ?

Do I get bored sometimes ? Yes that’s why I started tying her up and spanking her and other unmentionables

Is the desire still there to fuck other younger hotter women ? Absolutely. But what’s your goals in life?

Mine is to maintain and raise an amazing family , keep my wife sexually interested in me. Make lots of money and retire early , all while having fun and learning new skills

If the opportunity presents itself to fuck a hot 25 year old blonde someday. I will make that decision then. But until then

Do whatever the fuck it is you want to do

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm glad you're on a good path. I'm still trying to find mine.

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

That's not the expression. It's "For every beautiful woman somewhere is a man tired of her shit." Not at all the same thing.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's a quote from a movie (Perfect Stranger), thats where i heard it from. Not saying that I should be applying quotes from fiction but I always remember it.

[–]JameisBong0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

If she's bitchy and nags sure. I dealt with a BPD wife who was a 6 but a fatty and looked better than me. I was tired of her out of control issues and infidelity. If she was submissive,kind and feminine we would still be together. You don't lose attraction for a sexy feminine woman. Your wife is probably the complete opposite of whatever you claim here.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

You don't lose attraction for a sexy feminine woman. Your wife is probably the complete opposite of whatever you claim here.

I'm probably not painting the entire picture because I doubted anyone would read a wall of text. I'm very independent and she's very clingy. The clinginess is a turn-off.

[–]JameisBong1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

That makes sense. Does she work?Or is she a SAHM?

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

She works but her job pays multiple times less than mine. Her's is 9-5, mine is my own business so I can easily work 12+ hours a day.

[–]JameisBong1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Hmm, interesting. Get her a puppy,it might keep her busy and happy away from you.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Or Ketamine.

[–]JameisBong1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Right.

[–]RPWolfAlpha_as_Wolf_2.01 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy

So wait, instead of growing balls and pulling the plug so she can go out and actually get some dick while she is still good looking you would rather hold her hostage in a relationship where you aren't attracted to her?? ** cough - bullshit - cough**

Well then at least have the balls to tell her you want an open marriage so you both can go out and fuck strange. Oh wait, I bet you are afraid she would get laid before you??

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

Oh wait, I bet you are afraid she would get laid before you??

I have multiple offers, which is part of the problem.

[–]coinbaserep2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

Then fuck those women and then go back and see how you feel about your wife

Grass is greener mentality

I bet you think having sex with other new women will solve your problems.

They won’t. Your just too fucked to see it

I would like to hear your wife’s stats

Height , weight , breast size, waist size, hips to waist ratio

I don’t believe she’s as hot as you say she is because if she is then maybe you should just divorce her and stay single and fuck hot young women until your old and your dick doesn’t work anymore

But I have my doubts you could pull it off in your current state

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

I don’t believe she’s as hot as you say she is

Ah, I said she's pretty, I didn't say she's hot. Truth is I know I could fuck hotter women and thats what I want to do, my libido is constantly urging me to go plow. Overall my SMV is a lot higher than its ever been (business, lifting, etc). But I'd be sacrificing a lot to do it, comfort and all that. But I guess if I work on myself and my frame I won't need that comfort from someone else.

[–]coinbaserep0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Exactly your just trying to feed your ego

I get what your saying. Now I am sure if you got bust a nut in some random and see how your feeling after

I have the same desires but not ready to blow up my marriage to feed my ego and get my rocks off

Reminds me of that terrible beta movie hall pass

you think you can bang hotter until you actually get out there and try.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Well, I have banged hotter in previous relationships. I know whats out there and my SMV is higher than ever.

[–]coinbaserep1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

If that’s what’s important to you then you do you

Guess you have to decide

1: Divorce her 2: Tell her you have desires to fuck other women and want to stay married but will fuck other women to fill those desires 3: fuck other women behind her back

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Conclusion is No. 1.

Thanks.

[–]Thorondor_Rising1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're a faggot. I suggest you implode your marraige so you can find the true love that sweeps you off your feet into a magical world of faggoty romance. Tell him MRP says hi.

[–]JoeBuckYourslf1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fucking troll.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

“Watch porn fap”.

Not into my wife.

She is pretty. She is into me. Don’t want to hurt her.

Tell me what the fuck you want. I’ll figure out your cure, but I’ll tell you right now quit watching porn and pounding to it

Do you even lift ?

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I want to leave and fuck other women. She is objectively attractive, but not attractive enough to me. I do lift regularly and I think my standards have risen as a result. The reason for the post is the guilt of the decision I've already made and my trying to reconcile it - which after reading theory of the Dark Triad is how my brain is wired and not changable.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Then leave and fuck other women.

Your reference to Dark Triad is validation hollowness seeking.

The thought process to psychotherapy in relation to emotional bias is not dictated to how your brain is wired- it is wired to the experiences you have had that have had an emotional impact on you.

It is very important to emphatically analyze thought processes and what drives them.

Your immediate and long term happiness hinge upon doing the work in the sidebar fully and avoid cherry picking snippets to which fits your circumstance at the moment.

[–]RelationshipSOS2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Your immediate and long term happiness hinge upon doing the work in the sidebar fully and avoid cherry picking snippets to which fits your circumstance at the moment.

I'm not cherry picking per se, but I definitely haven't completely absorbed the side-bar which I'm sure is obvious by now. Will continue to do so though.

[–]JoeBuckYourslf0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Trololololololol



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