Rereading sidebar. Making sure I have not missed anything. Read: MMSL MAP NMMNG again Sex God Method RM 1, 2 ,and 3
Finally realized I created all of this. I failed to lead. I let my ego take control. I allowed my little feelings get in the way. Absent Captain. Absent father.
I see progress. I STFU alot. Becoming more aware of catching myself in her frame...but struggling to regain mine....so revert to STFU when I cannot. Lifting, and have been for years. Have Tuesday and Thursday evening with just myself and by two young sons for Jijitsu and Saturday mornings for baseball alone. Just started Jujitsu myself....and my size and strength have no advantage to this type of martial art...absolutely phenomenal sport. I am spending more time speaking and being with my male friends.....why the fuck I was not previously is just plain stupid.
Nowhere near where I should be, but I am chatting up more random women. Even have a sexy young waitress at my regular lunch spot flirting with me and vice versa. Getting a lot more smiles....she baked for me last week. my confidence is getting a lot better when I am slowly learning not to give a fuck.
Overall, wife is responding with small positive baby steps, and I am passing more shit tests than failing.....I need to work on frame and self control more.
I know I have a long way to go and all of this is a life long process.
Sex with the wife....I talk more now during sex and she responds with more moans and grabs me more. She resists a bit less when I approach now. Still a bit whining here and there....fucking annoying and I get all of these stupid thoughts which are probably true of her not really desiring me....all due to me being a pussy for so long.
She always cums either with me inside or me eating her out. She does give more BJ's but I have to tell her to and it still seems like a chore for her.
Most of the time, after she finishes....she tells me to hurry up. I FUCKING HATE THAT.
Still feels she only fucks just to fuck and cum, and not due to the littlest desire for me. Trying to incorporate ideas from Sex God Method.
Just this morning I fucked her while she was asleep. Incorporated a bit from SGM....she came hard and I continued to slowly fuck her. She tells me to hurry up. I stopped and told her that was a turn off. No butt hurt and just went on with my morning with a smile. Other times she gets whiny after sex and starts complaining about random shit.
I know Rome was not built in a day, but would like some insight if there is anything I may be missing.