I will start this off with a brief origin story to provide a backdrop to the discussion. This year I got my notch count past 30, it was only sitting at about 10 by the end of 2018. I am in my late 20s and lost my virginity at 24. Late bloomer, good looking but had shitty self esteem and social anxiety as a teenager. Raised by a beta dad and then smoked too much weed for too long which stunted my social development.

The good news is I quit weed a few years back and found the red pill via Rollo. I have slowly improved but recently it has been compounding and I'm having a lot more success. Of course this comes with a bunch of fuckups. Usually shooting myself in the dick or not going for it when the girl is clearly into me.

The two biggest ways I fuck up:

  1. I see a girl out or in the club and gain some rapport with her, but then I start to latch onto her mentally and the problems start. I am quick to get ego invested in my desire to fuck her, which typically leads to not fucking her (surprise). I then get into a shitty mood because I didn't succeed.
  2. Trying too hard to be aloof when a girl is into me, resulting in her losing interest because I'm looking around for other girls or whatever. It's fucking dumb because I am attracted to her, I just don't want to come off needy which leads to me going too far in the other direction.

My inner beta is still a huge part of my outward personality and I really don't want it to be.

Should I simply keep at it and spin more plates, continuing to grow from experience?

Or, do you have supplimentary ideas that could accelerate my development? Perhaps some strategies you have used to successfully to overcome similar problems?