Only if sexy is on the cards

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realestillusion
October 11, 2019
7 upvotes
askMRP

I’m still very new and slightly less overwhelmed by all the content here. Slowly but surely making progress everyday albeit its limited to reading.

Just a quick question for the MRP gurus. My wife suggested going on a date on a Friday afternoon rather than the weekend so as to not have to worry about baby sitting. I’m self employed so I can make that happen easily enough.

However I don’t want to just easily give that to her because she sure as shit doesn’t just easily give me what I want. (I know BP thinking) I’m working on that.

So how can I tell her that the only way she is getting me during business hours is if it’s to have sex?

I hate knowing about TRP/MRP and frame etc but having zero clue on how to implement it. I’m a total rookie at this point in my journey but man these few weeks have really woken me up to reality!!


Post Information
Title Only if sexy is on the cards
Author realestillusion
Upvotes 7
Comments 63
Date 11 October 2019 03:07 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/289734
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/dg948b/only_if_sexy_is_on_the_cards/
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Comments

[–]0io-Tsundere50 points51 points  (15 children) | Copy

You must start lifting. Right away. Reading is good, lifting is better. Do both!

So, trading the date for sex is trying to "negotiate sex", which is not what you want to do (it's a bad idea because it doesn't work, and if it does work you're getting transactional sex not genuine desire, like if you paid for sex with a stripper who just wants your money to buy some drugs.)

If you go on the date with the expectation that you're doing what she wants so she'll do what you want that's called a "covert contract" which is also bad. Read No More Mr Nice Guy to find out just how bad it is. It's bad, never works, makes everyone hate you. Don't do it.

Now you have to ask yourself "is this date going to be fun for me or not?" If it's going to be fun, and you don't have a higher, better use of your time on a Friday, go on the date and have fun. If you have some other thing you would rather do then you decline the date. Make sure your other thing to do is not stay at home and play video games or something lame like that.

You should be trying to initiate sex a lot, regardless of the date, and how well it goes, etc.

If your wife is genuinely unpleasant to be around, you keep scheduling yourself to be busier (busy going to the gym, busy taking clients out, busy playing sports, busy doing whatever you do.) So you don't punish the wife by not going on a date because you don't get the sex you want, you turn down the date because you're already scheduled to spar with your friends Buzz, Rocky and DeShawn at the boxing gym. Eventually you're gone so much that wife actually starts missing you and wants to come watch you box, or go hiking, or play hockey, or whatever it is that you do.

You have to (absolutely must) get in good shape. That means lifting weights. This makes you more sexually desirable to everybody. Then when you're having sex, you're trading sex for sex (genuine desire). If you're not there yet, at least you can be fun to be around and you can have fun out on your date Friday. If the date isn't fun, start scheduling other stuff for your Fridays.

Good luck!

[–]Imaginary_Historian3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Sure, it makes sense that he shouldn't negotiate for sex instead of going out, but I think he could initiate when she gets home in the afternoon.

[–]Balls_Wellington_6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

You should always be initiating if you are in the mood.

But you shouldn't get upset when rejected because "I went on a date for you" or whatever, that's a classic covert contract and will dry the pussy right up.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

​

So how can I tell her that the only way she is getting me during business hours is if it’s to have sex?

​

There may come a time - if you put in the work - when you will be able to command your wife to come to your office wearing no panties and get her to ride your cock while you have clients waiting for you in reception.

But you haven't put in the work.

You don't lift.

You've barely touched the sidebar.

You don't do OYS.

You only post here when you have an "emergency" of some description.

Right now, you're looking at you shitty life, your crappy once a month sex plan, looking at everyone else thinking "I want this. I want a wife who respects me, does what I tell her and fucks me like her life depends upon it". You feel like you're in Hell, while all the "gurus" are in Heaven.

The good news is that you are no longer in Hell. Hell is the Blue Pill Kingdom. Hell is the life you had before you discovered the Red Pill. Hell is the lie, Heaven is the truth.

The bad news is that you're now in Purgatory. And in Purgatory, you get to attone for your sins. The sin of being a fat cunt, the sin of being a lazy cunt, the sin of being a pushover, the sin of being a doormat, the sin of being a shit lover, the sin of not developing, the sin of being a Blue Pill faggot.

While you are in Purgatory, you need to suck it up. You need to realise that you will never have the sex life you want unless you attone for your sins. And all the while, you will be doing this while knowing that the gurus you talk about are fucking their wives - and other women as well as their wives, in some cases - as often as they like, as hard as they like, in as many places, positions and holes as they like. And their women thank them for it and come back to them begging for more.

So, now you know how to get out of Purgatory.

The only question is - how long do you plan on staying there?

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

So how can I tell her that the only way she is getting me during business hours is if it’s to have sex?

Making the covert contract overt is not going to work out for you. You can't negotiate desire. If you're really this new, then try this:

Go out with her on a Friday afternoon if YOU want to. If you don't because it wouldn't be fun or you'd rather do something else, then do that. The first step to getting out of her frame is to start thinking about what you want, not whether or not it plays into some power dynamic with her: there is no spoon.

Also: STFU, read, lift.

[–]bowhunter8577 points8 points  (14 children) | Copy

This is majoring in the minors man. Moving a date so you don’t have to leave your kids with a babysitter sounds perfectly reasonable to me. Does she deny you sex often?

Also pretty easy fix just say you wanna run home and fuck before you go out.

[–]realestillusion[S] 4 points5 points  (13 children) | Copy

On its own it is a reasonable request. However I’ve learned that I have to guard my work time because she has no problem taking and taking. This was an issue when I first started my business.

She’s eased up a little on the denying of sex. But still not as often as I’d like. If were having sex at least once a week, that would be great compared to the every other month/quarter that it’s been.

I’m still in her frame. My saying let’s go home to fuck then go out probably wouldn’t work.

[–]rockstarsheep7 points8 points  (12 children) | Copy

Every other MONTH? Even worse - every other QUARTER?

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

Way to bury the ducking lead man. Holy shit. You’re in a bad situation. Time to really start fixing yourself. As for the date - don’t fucking make it a covert contract. - sex for date. Go on a date with your fucking wife to have fun with her. Tease her, flirt with her. And game her.

Lift, sidebar and stfu right now.

And take her on a date and make it fun. If you go to a movie you suck.

[–]realestillusion[S] 1 point2 points  (10 children) | Copy

It’s been a rough and testing 12-18 months. The strain of building a business with my wife being a SAHM made for some tough times. We (she) were about to pull the pin on our marriage in July until she saw how it was going to impact the kids. In truth I can’t blame her for wanting to end things. So yeh I know I know I have major work to do on all fronts.

Had it not been for all this I don’t think I would have come across TRP.

[–]rockstarsheep16 points17 points  (9 children) | Copy

Not to get more down on you, brother. You don’t need that right now. I’ll give some context for my response.

I was you, some years ago. With a few key differences. It was an LTR. There were no kids to consider. Well, she had an abortion in the last 6 months of our relationship. We both knew that things were over, so I’ll give her that she knew what the right thing to do, was. Anyway, I mention that last detail, because we had that kind of regularity. It was a begrudged chore.

I wasn’t RP aware then. I was your typical Beta / AFC. Having grown up in an abusive, gynocentric family environment. I employed covert contracts and got passive-aggressive, because I couldn’t hold my own frame.

So that’s some context.

I can see now, that being your own “Mental Point of Origin” - i.e. positive self-regard and positive selfishness, is vital to personal wellbeing. Being brought up, beaten and threatened in to serving a female agenda, this was the last thing on my mind, and I suffered for it, in more ways, than just being in a healthy relationship. I packaged my conflicts up as “duty” to others. Too much self-sacrifice, and you’re going to be at your wits end, eventually. You really won’t build yourself up, and will just hold on, because you develop the strength to do so through routine. You can really get used to anything, when you’ve been exposed to it enough times.

Thing is, there’s always this gnaw, that you somehow know that you’re doing yourself wrong. It’s not just you, but by virtue of not being a stronger and better you, you inadvertently don’t help others either. Being human is complicated. It’s not just pushing the biological agenda of DNA replication. There’s a lot of existential angst to navigate. The loneliness of consciousness; it’s something we all feel. We can front confidence, but there’s always that sort of spooky feeling that you’re all alone in this big thing called Life! The bravest of the brave feel this too. It’s part of the package.

In spite of everything, we strive to live out our lives, seeking some sort of meaningful purpose. That in the face that we know we’re going to eventually grow old, fall apart and die. So we seek out to optimise the quality of our choices; as efficiently as possible, to include that which we think is best for us and our ambitions. And that includes people, as much as nutrition and physical fitness. It’s easier to change diet lifestyle and training, than it is to swop out or change people, particularly and especially, when there are children involved. There’s a tendency in RP to go down that road, where if all you have is a hammer, then everything is a nail. That is to say, that nuance is often lost, because (sometimes) RP lacks sophistication, as a great many of the thought leaders are in their positions, more by accident and less by default design. More than likely, this is due to aggressive feminism gone wrong, but also societal programming and technology (birth control) run amok.

That’s a little off-piste, but I feel like it needs to be said, in the run up to what comes next. Not advice, but some fuel for you to work with.

What is it that you want out of this relationship? Set aside the “wife” part of the equation, with this woman. It would appear or it may be, that originally, you wanted that romance, that the social story gives us. That could lead to children. A future with a life partner, etc. Maybe you need to be brutally honest with yourself, right now. Did you sign up for what you’re getting? Did you even know or even imagine you’d be getting this? There’s no blame in coming to realize, that this wasn’t it. Because I think that LTR’s are sold as achievements; pussy on tap and a partner to stand by you, through thick and thin.

I’m guessing the answer will be, no. Given that, as well as a little insight in that; “Women aren’t there for who you are, but what you are...” might shine some light in to your darkness. It’s a facet of hypergamy, and unless women are aware that this is how they’re hardwired, and have a choice or choices to make, to not fall victim to this, I would say that most modern day relationships are doomed to failure, rather than success. It does however take some conscious effort on the input of women to comprehend this. That also means coping with their tendency towards solipsism.

With you making changes in your life, you’re going to disrupt expectations. If you’re living in her frame, as the SAHM, her frustrations in doing that job, might become some of yours too. Just by the virtue of being there. As they say, you’re playing on “Hard Mode,” already ... this just takes things up a notch. Familiarity does breed contempt. You need some distance, and I hope that you’re getting it. If not, then you might want to make that something to look in to.

As for working on all fronts, equally and simultaneously; be careful with that. Seek out simple solutions first. Consider a broad range of them, and this doesn’t exclude a plate on the side, if you really need to get some. Set aside moral judgement here. If it makes your marriage work for the time being, it’s at the very least an option to consider. Certain parts of relationships, are negotiated. There’s a lot to be said that desire isn’t one of them. As most women like to think that they have men, all figured out, she no doubt thinks that she’s got you all figured out. Change that. Keep her guessing. If even a little.

I don’t know if or how much of the above is applicable or helpful to you. These thoughts are offered in a spirit of good will. Keep strong.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (6 children) | Copy

What you wrote about here deserves a marriedredpill post. This parallels my last 12 months here and lots of revelations about myself and self validation. And it’s written a lot better than I fucking could.

Thing is, there’s always this gnaw, that you somehow know that you’re doing yourself wrong. It’s not just you, but by virtue of not being a stronger and better you, you inadvertently don’t help others either. Being human is complicated. It’s not just pushing the biological agenda of DNA replication. There’s a lot of existential angst to navigate.

The gnaw. I love it. It’s your body’s way of telling you what you’re doing isn’t in line with what you KNOW you really want to do.

The loneliness of consciousness; it’s something we all feel. We can front confidence, but there’s always that sort of spooky feeling that you’re all alone in this big thing called Life! The bravest of the brave feel this too. It’s part of the package.

You need to accept this and regardless of that feeling, do what you want without fear of being alone.

[–]rockstarsheep7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy

Thank you for your kind compliment, sir! Much appreciated.

I’m going to add this. Unplugging. Neo only has to take the pill once. Somehow so powerful, that he just gets it. In an ordinary sense, things very rarely, if ever happen with such an event. Change is gradual. If you consider how children develop speech, it takes them at least 2 years of listening to sound(s) to start to get the most basic grasp of language. And then the development path, only progresses. In another sense, taking the RP is learning a whole new language, in and of itself. Except instead of having a blank slate to work with, you have a competing language, which is far more ingrained in to your psyche and day to day life.

So when it does come to taking the RP, it takes time to integrate it. It’s a learning process. Something which I noticed for myself, and I dare say others, is the interweaving of moments of clarity and then confusion again. You just have to keep on at it, because you can find yourself at the starting line, over and over again. And maybe that’s a good thing. It keeps you aware of yourself.

Something else, and it’s unrelated to this post - or maybe it isn’t. Anger. In a way, I quite often detect anger and rage in posts. Perhaps not on this sub so much, but on the main sub. Whilst our experiences are personal, with other people (women) - this is not really personal as such. It’s just the nature of things. I am sure we don’t wave our fists at birds, pissed off because they have wings and we don’t. We have to make do with what we have and make the best of things. Or the better of things.

In a way we are engaged in this game of - “Are we there yet?” - and it never seems that we are. I think some of the gnaw comes from that. And like the two sides of a coin, the gnaw can be a call to action or a signal of defeat. Life is very rarely ideal. And really maybe that’s the best that we can get; if it was all plain sailing, we’d never be confronted with challenges to grow and change.

Life is filled with potential, but sometimes it is really difficult to see, let alone appreciate it. Sometimes we need to go in to dark places to find out what our light is. We need to become accustomed to the darkness and then work our way out towards whatever our light is. And then it’s back to the grind.

I’ll be super honest. I was mad as hell at the lies that I believed and my beta approach. The amount of suck I created for myself, was embarrassing. I cringe at how I have been. So about three years ago, when I first came across RP - officially that is. I was plenty fucked off. I felt wronged. I became a little bitch. Thing is though, I kept on at it. And I think that’s the key. You need to keep on at it. I am glad that there are still some constructive conversations to be had.

And here’s the irony, I was trained as a psychotherapist. RP is not even really touched on at all. Feminism has creeped in to that, and I really think it has done a disservice to men. Maybe I could put together a piece on the gnaw. I’d be happy to make some sort of contribution.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

You should. Would be a good post on the main sub.

[–]rockstarsheep3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Alright then. I’ll do it. I’ll give it my best shot. Thanks for the encouragement. I appreciate that.

[–]Maximus_Valerius2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Very well written with almost no jargon, which shows a depth of understanding.

[–]rockstarsheep1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you. And that’s the thing. Jargon has become the staple. It stifles any sort of progress. Old ideas are rehashed, and not progressed. There’s a need to integrate perceived or accepted wisdom, as well as an evolution of ideas. That’s progress.

Things need to move on. I’m afraid that’s what is not happening. I make no claim to know anything more than anyone else. Perhaps I can put to words, what we somehow know, yet can’t express. I feel that we have a noble cause, which might not be fully appreciated yet. And I find it deeply ironic, that it is men who are genuinely clearing a path for everyone. Perhaps that’s our purpose. Because the outcome is a positive net gain for everyone. That’s really the whole gist.

Anyway, I have agreed to make a coherent post, that integrates some of my and I do believe, the shared ideas of others. As rare as we are, we need to exist. Because the future coming at us, is a horrible circus. I hope I can do some justice here. Because I can seen a new wave of stealth PUA’s circling around us. And they’re only in this for personal gain. I want nothing of the sort. Maybe a little clarity. And that will be good for everyone. I hope so!

[–]Chump_No_More2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

The gnaw. I love it. It’s your body’s way of telling you what you’re doing isn’t in line with what you KNOW you really want to do.

Agreed. The dissonance of living an inauthentic life can be very strong.

We're told to "trust our gut" but then (a gyno-centric) society shames us for doing so and compels us to act against our own best interest.

Fuck that.

Post RP, if I've learned anything, every time I have not followed my gut and prioritized myself, I have invited and heaped heartache and disappointment upon (and for) myself.

No More.

[–]realestillusion[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Dude thank you for your wise words! Very well written and expressed!

You've given me a lot to think about along with things I'm now more confusion about.

I know I'm not what she signed up for. In a number of ways she's not what I signed up for. But as for who's deviated the most, I'd say that'd be me. Hence why I'm here asking the stupid questions and just trying to learn how to live a fulfilling life.

Thanks again brother!

[–]rockstarsheep1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Absolutely my pleasure. There's indeed a lot to think about in life.

From personal experience, I will say this.

Try and not think too much about everything.

Sometimes we end up going in circles. We don't intend to, or really mean to, but this can happen. It's often only at the end of a period of time that we come to know these things.

And that can apply for what we "sign up to" in life. We're more than often working with incomplete and inaccurate information. We need to make assessments and evaluations, based on what we think is right and wrong (for us, and for others) - and then make a decision. And hopefully along the way, we learn something.

And with this in mind, I think the most important thing that we can all do for ourselves, is to be honest with and accountable to, our highest values. Even if we fall short of them at times. We have to forgive - and in essence that means - for give - to give in advance, and cut ourselves some slack. And that can often be the hardest thing to do. Yet, it is the most important thing to do. So, brother, whatever the outcome is, for whatever and wherever you are - don't beat yourself up about being a human being.

Hope you had a good weekend!

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy

You haven’t read much if you’re asking us how to negotiate for sex. We don’t do that ‘round these parts. The best advice for you is to go on the date without any expectation for sex whatsoever. In the mean time, STFU, keep lifting and reading.

[–]neilcross4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is the best advice. Go have fun. I’m sure you aren’t at the point where you have something better to do. It will surprise the crap out of her. I mean have real fun. Help plan it. See if you can plan the whole thing. I’m new too but I think this is sound advice. I know my wife loves it if I take care of the planning. The main thing is don’t expect sex. Just don’t. That comes later apparently. Post an update too. I’m curious to see how this goes.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

So you expect to fuck after each date ?

Read between the lines.

You lifting ?

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah. I do.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Do the work, and live the results, then you can stop expecting

[–]simbarlionRed Beret5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

title says it all.

Having abundance is your secret weapon here. In fact its your only way to influence her desire to have sex with you.

Anything you do to make her have sex is unattractive.

So,

Doing the work = becoming attractive = having abundance = natural dread = she wants to have sex with you.

​

Oh, and also remember,

that thing you really want

[–]lololasaurus4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

The first thing I noticed is your comment that you're more focused on cardio and eating right now. That's not paying attention, though. Lifting is not optional.

You need to show up and do the work. At a minimum, every other day. Do you like living the way you're living, coming close to getting a divorce, only being granted a stay on this divorce for the time she can run up for more alimony (maybe permanent, depending on kid age!?) And then file after the kids move out?

You need to become your own mental point of origin. You are extremely unlikely to do this without beginning to make some of your own choices to take responsibility for your own well being. Since you're incapable of deciding even simple things like what day you should go on a date with your wife without asking internet strangers, you are certainly not capable of deciding that you don't need to lift even though lifting is not optional.

The changes you will begin to see after you lift change everything. It will build abundance. Do you know why? Because you'll be in public, and at first you'll feel validated from women paying attention to you (or maybe imagining it, at first). Your wife will feel your arms when you're having sex, and she'll keep feeling them, and maybe feed you some line of bs about how she doesn't like muscular men, but she'll be wetter than you can remember her being ever as she keeps feeling your arms. You'll pick her up and carry her to the bed as she squeals in delight. You'll be out in public and women will say -in front of your wife - that you look like a certain celebrity, and she'll tease you about it the whole time knowing that this other woman was finding you attractive. Eventually you'll realize that you don't need that validation because you are your own judge.

Then you'll decide for yourself if you want to date your wife on a Friday or a Saturday, and you know what else is kinda cool? There's a good chance that when you're awesome enough to make your own grown up decisions and pursuing a grown up mission and showing up in your own life day after day consistently instead of skipping that and kicking the divorce can down the road until it will be even more destructive, your wife might even be excited for either day, because she likes spending time with positive, high energy, decisive, attractive men that have a mission worth her committing to helping with. Or you'll improve and realize she's insufferable, already came home with another guys sperm in her, or who knows what. But once you show up in your own life and decide what it is you want, you'll be able to respond to something awful like that as you ought.

This probably won't happen after a month lifting. Or 4 months. Or 9. It'll start to change after about as many months as you've been married in years. If you're really inept, like I was, you might go twice that.

Get you to the OYS. Make your MAP. Show up in your own damn life and learn that you are a person with an identity and learn what it is you WANT in life. Then answer yes or no based on whether it contributes to that.

STFU, lift, read.

[–]lololasaurus3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Also you're prioritizing reading. Reading is easy. Do it between sets at the gym. It takes years to build an attractive body. Are you gonna wait years before you decide to start waiting years? Nothing but regret comes of that idiocy.

I wish I would have started lifting when I was a teenager. I wish I'd started training BJJ when I was a teenager. I wish I'd developed physical competency and mastery then; my life would have been radically different.

But I didn't, so I had to start this only after I realized it was important. Reading is easier than lifting. Getting head knowledge is easier than applying it. But only application will actually change your life.

It took me about a year and a half to get into the thousand pound club in lifting.

Do you suppose I would have been better off not taking my marriage right up to brink of divorce before I finally gave in and showed up in my own life? What about you?

Go lift heavy things until you can't. Then get up the next day and do it again. If you don't know how then message me and I'll give you some starting tips. Minimal because you have to show up and do the work or it's all pointless.

[–]Ohms2North0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

When is the best time to plant a tree? Twenty years ago. When’s the next best time? Today

[–]hack3geRed Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

First off faggot you don’t implement TRP/MRP - it’s not a bag of fucking tricks to get your your dick wet in your wife’s current dry as the Sahara pussy. It’s a framework for you to build yourself into a man who a woman wants to fuck in the bathroom at the restaurant while you are on a date - who waits to go home anymore these days? Seriously.

You are right about one thing - you don’t know shit and haven’t even begun to understand the amount of work it takes to get there. All you know is that the world as you used to know it wasn’t real and everything you thought was wrong. Buckle up because it’s a bumpy ride and that anger phase is right around the corner.

I went from sex once a quarter to sex 1-2 times a day in 2 years so let that settle in - two fucking years of working on myself day in and day out. In a few weeks you haven’t even read the first few books on sidebar - I had read them at least twice in that amount of time.

You have 6 months minimum of reading, lifting and shutting the fuck up as your first assignment. Get to it you lazy faggot.

[–]Iammrp28 points9 points  (9 children) | Copy

You're a fucking retard. Shut the fuck up and stick those cards right up your ass.

I don’t want to just easily give that to her because she sure as shit doesn’t just easily give me what I want.

This is quid pro quo. I'm assuming what you want is sex. Transactional sex. You want a prostitute. Why the fuck did you get married?

So how can I tell her that the only way she is getting me during business hours is if it’s to have sex?

You're trying to negotiate sex. Read the fucking side bar. You may need to start with The Rational Male. If you want your woman to have sex with you then be the type of man women want to have sex with. You can't negotiate desire. I told you this 6 weeks ago. https://www.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/cvwpn6/to_stay_or_not_stay/eyaiaqr

YOU CAN'T NEGOTIATE DESIRE. Let that sink in. You ask advice here and you do no work whatsoever. Why are you even here?

I hate knowing about TRP/MRP and frame etc but having zero clue on how to implement it.

News flash. You don't know jack shit.

I’m a total rookie at this point in my journey but man these few weeks have really woken me up to reality!!

Do you want a cookie? A more accurate post would have been:

I found RP a few weeks ago. I have no fucking clue what I'm doing. I haven't read the sidebar. I want sex. How do I get sex? Let me think.. Women want X. If I do X then I'll get sex. What does my woman want? She wants a date night. Perfect. I'll hold that hostage for sex. What do you guys think?

I think you're a faggot who will fail.

[–]Perfectinmyeyes6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

After reading the other responses I was thinking is this the right forum people are being so 'nice'.

[–]RoccoPinkman3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Me too

[–]realestillusion[S] -1 points0 points  (6 children) | Copy

If you really think I’m going to fail why are you so invested in my questions?

I’ve been reading a lot of the sidebar content and taking it all in. Making the connection between the sidebar and my specific circumstances is the hard part because this is just not how I’ve lived my life to date.

Whether or not it’s your intention, your comments stand out the most and cut through to the core which is exactly what I need. So thank you.

[–]Iammrp21 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

If you really think I’m going to fail why are you so invested in my questions?

If you post another question that is answered in the sidebar (such as should I negotiate desire?) I think you should be banned.

You need some kind of flair /u/weakandsensitive usually comes up with good ones

[–]weakandsensitive1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I mean... you can't willingly go into askMRP and complain that it's a dumpster fire....

I don't do any modding on askMRP. I think that's mostly SSS.

[–]Iammrp20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Lol true

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Open to suggestions.

[–]Iammrp20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Master Negotiator

[–]marv86kw1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

So you got advise from this guy, didn't follow it, and when you posted again and got an excellent response from him, you ask why he's invested?

Idiot, print his reply and tape it yo your mirror. Everything he said is correct, and you'd do well to take his response up your ass and internalize it well. Like shove it up there till it hits the medulla.

Reading sidebar and thinking those ideas are jolly doesn't make you and less of a blue pill faggot. Own your shit.

[–]redrulesusa2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Let me give you similar situations to what you said with your dumbass question so maybe it will sink in for you.

I have really been putting in a lot of effort since I heard about strength training. Mostly I have spent time reading Starting Strength and Stronglifts. Why is it I don’t feel the euphoria and pump caused by lifting heavy weights?

I have been putting in a lot of work into increasing my wealth. Mostly I have read books by Warren Buffet and Tim Ferris. Why is my income not going up?

The answer to both of those questions are the same as the answer to yours. You are a lazy fucker. Get off your ass and do some work towards achieving your goal. People like you make sick. You basically had the nerve to come on here and say I’m doing nothing and it’s not working so I want those of you who are working your ass off to achieve greatness to lift me up because I shouldn’t have to do anything to achieve my goals .

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Have you had your T levels checked? Seriously though? Stress of a bad relationship, poor lifestyle choices will ruin them in a heartbeat.

[–]The_LitzRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

You are still equating Dates=Sex.

Next you will also tell me Birthday=sex

and

Anniversary=SEX

You will make better progress when you stop thinking about sex.

Think of it as 'I am spending time with my wife because she is good company and I want to try out the new XYZ restaurant'.

Make this a weekly thing. You spent a lot of time in your business, take some back for yourself. Don't include the kids in every thing, do it for yourself. Many guys come in here and are so used to being draft animals the fail look after themselves.

Even better, take every Friday afternoon off for yourself. Invite her along. Or not.

The fact that she is initiating time with you is good. She is waiting for her captain to get the message and steer the ship.

And lift brother, my journey only started when I held the iron in my hand and owned my space in the squat rack.

[–]SeamusAwl1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hard to stop thinking about sex when she isnt given it to him. It is like telling a guy to quit thinking about breathing while he is drowning. What the OP should do in both cases is to stop panicking and focus on doing the steps needed to get sex/air. That is the only way to get it.

[–]Rogue684861 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lift. It's good for your brain as well

You're being autistic and rambo about your wife. Do the date. Then initiate to do her.

[–]JustAboutDone30700 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You are clearly not listening or invested in the plan that others have laid out.

Negotiating sex doesn’t work and it’s repeated in these threads and the sidebar .... Over and over and over and over...

Same goes with lifting.... Its repeated over and over and over and over... Do it!

You are trying to play a hand(game) that you haven’t a clue about.

[–]The_LitzRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Very true, I should rather say don't make pussy the only mission.

[–]Rifleshoot0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Post your stats so people can give you good advice. There are different tactics you need to use at different levels of attractiveness. If you’re a fat slob, dread simply will not work. She has to actually care about losing you, and if you look awful, she won’t care anyways because she knows you couldn’t do better than her. If you are physically attractive, then withdrawing time and attention could have an effect. But, as a newbie, you probably lack both physical and mental attractiveness.

[–]onionknightofknee0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Is your business becoming successful? She could be delaying divorce until u are successful so she gets more, maybe on guidance of a lawyer.

If it was, I would divorce her now since she wanted it, improve yourself in business and fitness, start sexing women 10 years younger.

Ur kids will be better with a dad who respects himself rather than not

[–]marv86kw0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Seriously, why do you think you can post this time wasting shit if you haven't bothered to read sidebar. Low quality post.

You're a fag playing to her tune. You have no frame.

You're the problem. Fix yourself.

Then come back and see what kind of questions you'll be asking.



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