TheRedArchive needs help
With 700,000+ posts and 16,000,000+ comments archived, and new Red Pill content being added every week, keeping TheRedArchive alive and discoverable to everyone is starting to become very costly. As a 20-year-old student who just moved out and is living independently for the first time, keeping TheRedArchive alive is beginning to cost me much more than I thought.

Therefore, if you appreciate the website, have gained a lot of knowledge and insight from it, and want to show your appreciation, you can do so by donating any amount that you want via the options below. The money will be used on the expensive monthly host bill and any future maintenance of the website.
Thank you, and I wish you all a successful 2021 and a good luck with achieving your goals and dreams!

Best, /u/dream-hunter

Ex-plate hits me up now that she's 29

Reddit View
November 24, 2019
181 upvotes

Dated girl 2 year ago, she went cold. I initiated a year later, she didn't want to meet. Another 6 months later I run into her randomly and she put on like 20lbs whereas I am more chiseled and bigger than ever. Exchanged pleasantries and went on my way.

2 years had gone by and now she's 29. Going through exes now that she's hitting the wall? She texts me now asking to what I've been up to and if I wanted to meet.

I text "I don't think that's a good idea"

She says "Why not?"

I want to say "Because you were fat last time I saw you" or "Because I don't fuck fat girls" but then it looks like I'm butthurt and trying to get back at her for denying me a year earlier.

I just left her on read.

Anyone fuck with them for your amusement?


Post Information
Title Ex-plate hits me up now that she's 29
Author uireoiu32
Upvotes 181
Comments 96
Date 24 November 2019 03:10 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/296467
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/e0zm61/explate_hits_me_up_now_that_shes_29/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
butthurtplatethe wall
Comments

[–]2SirKolbath181 points182 points  (4 children) | Copy

Pretty much any reply will seem butthurt. You handled it correctly to ignore it.

I consider women to be not too dissimilar from the homeless dude under the overpass near the baseball stadium in Seattle. When you walk past they'll yell anything to get your attention, and it has about as much relevance to my day.

The real question is why she can still contact you. I'd have blocked her after she went cold on me. I don't have time for that.

[–]jackandjill2250 points51 points  (2 children) | Copy

  • Yea I agree. I block women sometimes faster than they can block annoying guys that're harrassing them.

    However, & OP pay attention to this. This isn't uncommon AT ALL it doesn't even take 2 years sometimes 6-8 months for a girl living a hard lifestyle with no skills to become nasty & unattractive to pretty much everyone. I've seen it happen so many times its almost shocking. I have talked to my good female friends about it & we have literally laughed for hours. This is why you improve & make good choices. Most people don't survive above 24 y/o's before getting railroaded by life.

[–]throwaway11443531 points32 points  (1 child) | Copy

This is very true. I used to be in law school, where the average age is mid to late 20's for starting. It was UNBELIEVABLE watching the change in some of these women from first year to third year. Part of it was the stress, poor diet, lack of exercise, etc., but compound that with the age factor, and it was so crazy to watch countless women decline from like an 8 to a 5-6. I guess it was just a large cohort of pre-wall women, that allowed me to witness the wall smashing more than normal.

When I was in undergrad I didn't notice this effect at all.

[–]jackandjill2216 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're less aware when you're younger. You're just in the world rather than paying attention to it.

[–]Jabbermouth16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

I’m with you on this one. If a girl goes cold on me I have no problem blocking her. Not because I’m ‘butthurt’ but because it helps with moving on and prevents you from digging through the trash when she inevitably comes back around.

[–]collegeguy115161 points162 points  (3 children) | Copy

If you're not attracted to her dont fuck her. Simple as that. No need to be petty

[–]Casanova-Quinn14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly. And on top of that, let’s remember it’s 2019 gentlemen. You’re basically guilty until proven innocent if a vengeful woman claims that you beat her or raped her. Trolling girls isn’t worth it.

If you’re going to respond at all, just be polite and neutral. “Sorry I’m just not interested in dating you”. That will hit her harder because she’ll start wondering what’s wrong with her. If she asks why, don’t respond.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten108 points109 points  (5 children) | Copy

Being spiteful comes from a place of ego. If you're really the guy you want to be, you move on.

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (2 children) | Copy

Being spiteful comes from a place of ego.

Absolutely.

If you're really the guy you want to be, you move on.

I am curious about this. Let me be clear....when I see "plate" on asktrp I read "girlfriend." If OP was "blue pilled" and it was his "girlfriend" then your advice is spot on.

Now, let's say she was actually a plate who went cold even though OP was alpha as fuck. 9 times out of 10, she committed to some other dude, that's why she went cold. She's now hitting him up because she wants the D, knows he has options and doesn't care. (again, I don't think that's the case, we're now in hypotheticals)

What's the problem with that? (unless she's gross, that's a different matter)

To be perfectly clear, I'm talking about plates, I'm talking the strategy of "always have multiple girls in your life, never even pretend to commit to any of them, soft next if they give you grief, hard next if they do something really stupid, otherwise no need to next them because some schlub will eventually offer commitment, if they come back (and are not gross) just insert back into the rotation, rinse, repeat."

In other words, aren't ex-plates a hell of a lot different from ex-girlfriends?

Edit:

Looked at OP's history, here's your response to him 9 months ago on a post about "broken plates"

You'd have to be a big fag with an ego complex to turn down free pussy because she is attracted to you. What's so offensive about girls wanting you because you are attractive? Figure it out....

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

Looks like OP didn't learn.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Being spiteful comes from a place of ego. If you're really the guy you want to be, you move on.

I totally agree with this.

However I'm egotistical and angry and butthurt, so I'd go with something like "who pulled the pin on your fat grenade?"

[–]dm-lube1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I really love this comment

[–]MotiMorphosys61 points62 points  (7 children) | Copy

I'd leave it on read at this point.

I've been in that situation as well, and it's always best to do what women do when they're not interested. Be nice and act like you would be interested, but always be too busy.

you get to have your cake and eat it too. You're not being mean, you're fucking with her, and you're getting the attention of her hitting you up repeatedly. It's fun!

[–]kellykebab12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're not being mean, you're fucking with her, and you're getting the attention of her hitting you up repeatedly. It's fun!

Childish

Just work on things you actually care about, so you don't even have to internally debate about what to do when some old skank hits you up. Just ignore it and keep working on your own life. You know, like a mature adult would do.

Literally no reason to "fuck with" them unless a) you're bitter, or b) you're a psycho. If a, you need to move on and deal with that. If b, there's nothing I can say to make you a better person. I just hope you don't fuck with someone who's a bigger psycho than you. Or maybe you should and see what happens.

[–]Vipe7774 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Be nice and act like you would be interested, but always be too busy.

Women do this, because most of the time they have nothing better to do. If you, as a man, have time for something like this, I'd suggest working on yourself, because you're clearly not where you need to be.

[–]papunigga0312 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Pathetic.

[–]user201806201 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I honestly prefer those type of rejection from women. The words say, it's too bad I'm busy. But the actions clearly say, I don't want to meet.... And I can take that hint and keep my pride.

So I think saying "sure it would be fun to catch up." Is fine. And when she proposes a time, say, "sorry I can't make it then"... Do that 3 times, and she'll get the picture. And then this is over.

🤷‍♂️

[–]uireoiu32[S] 6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

I've been in that situation as well, and it's always best to do what women do when they're not interested. Be nice and act like you would be interested, but always be too busy.

Tbh I always feel bad about it and just tell them that they're not my type or I'm seeing someone.

[–]MotiMorphosys15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

I used to feel like that as well, until I began to understand how women communicate.

[–]hrm08945 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yo stop being a pussy. Either ignore the bitch or tell her she's too fat for u. Don't feel sorry for these hoes, especially since they love to play men 24/7.

[–]imtheoneimmortal14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy

You don’t have to answer You can answer in 2 years

[–]1rugged7922 points23 points  (0 children) | Copy

Eh.

The bitch hit the wall. Not only did she hit the wall, she hit that wall in the midst of drinking, eating straight garbage, and fucking dudes she wanted to fuck back when she was skinny. Now, due to treating her body like trash, she's washed up and trying to hit you up.

The reality of it is, she'll never be prettier than she was when you first met her. The only thing she can do to salvage the situation is to discover Yoga and Pilates or a salad. That shit has nothing to do with you though. If you got plates spinning, you're winning.

So, yeah. Block that bish and move on.

[–]TheStumblingWolf8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

You don't owe her an explanation, and if you do give her one, why do you feel like you have to justify yourself to her?

[–]PhaedrusHunt8 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy

I had a similar situation but it was with an ex LTR not a plate.

I hadn't seen her in a couple of years and the last time I had seen her was a big fuck frenzy, and she had still been really hot (she was a couple years older than me so when we first started going out when I was 20 and she was 22 and she had a lot more experience and a psychological edge on me, mostly that my dick did all the thinking at that time).

But she was going to come into town to stay with me and I was looking forward to it. I'm thinking at that time I was 24 or 5 and she was 26 or 7.

Well she came in the door and she was a different person. She gained a lot of weight due to some psych meds she was on of course, and the look in her eye was not the fiery fun person I remembered. My dick went Lloyd Irvin level limp.

I let her stay and she came on to me that night but I just brush it off. The next day she said directly that she had been trying to have sex with me the night before, and I told her that at this point I think that we are better off as just friends.

This is an LTR and someone that I actually cared about. I'm a pretty polite person southern hospitality and all that, so I was cordial with her. But If it had been just a former plate I probably would not have even let her stay the night.

Some more thing about a year ago. And ex that I had a really bad breakup with sent an email asking to meet up for coffee knowing full well I was in an LTR. The same typical, slutty, cut throat behavior that made our relationship such a dumpster fire.

I had absolutely no regard for her or her feelings but I still sent a polite email back declining and wishing her well.

A plate is a different story.

This woman ghosted you and disrespected you. She missed the ship. She's already suffering plenty, I promise. She knows that she's hurtling towards the wall with a giant splat. Your rejection is the splat.

You don't need to crush these women. They crush themselves.

I would say either nothing or if I wrote her back at all something along the lines of hey hope you're doing well, we had good times but I'm in a different place now and not interested in dating you. Take care.

That type of thing will drive her way crazier than any mean text you can send, and it won't have a negative effect on your reputation.

[–]wtfdoiaskfor12 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You don't need to crush these women. They crush themselves.

Super powerful sentence. Women do have advantage when we are younger... but if you work on yourself, by the time you're 27-30 you'll be slaying 20-something ladies all the time while the 27-28-29 year old ladies will be asking themselves: "why is this man such a kid, why won't he grow up and take A REAL WOMAN like myself?"

Also see definition of "real woman": old, fat, couldn't cook an egg.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I had a similar situation but it was with an ex LTR not a plate.

Please see my response to itiswritten above.

[–]NolanKnowstheTruth7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

Tell her that you'll meet up with her "As friends". Women hate that more than men do.

[–]hrm08946 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah but then he'll just be wasting his time

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's not important whether you seem butthurt or not. If you don't want anything from her, then her opinion doesn't matter.

Either say nothing, or go with simple honesty, phrased in a non-spiteful fashion: "I no longer find you attractive."

[–]jackandjill224 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'd probably go with the latter. I'm pretty direct & value it.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K186 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

Don't waste your time. 'fucking with them' shows you're invested in some way and is low status behaviour.

Move on. She fucked you around. She gets no attention.

Move....on

[–]akod10 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This: if they ever jerked your around, there is no need to respond to them when they come crawling back k later in life

[–]Be-dr42 points43 points  (3 children) | Copy

Stuff like this gives me more joy than sex. Love crushing their massive egos

[–]dmunny445 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

They do have fucking huge egos these days

[–]volvostupidshit26 points27 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hi fellow narc.

[–]Acceptancehunter8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

tbh I agree, nothing funner than destroying their reality by rejecting them, the shock and disbelief.

[–]Bleu_Cheese_Pursuits9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you really have nothing better to do and have some vindictiveness quota to satisfy, meet up with her and friendzone her. But frankly if you're taking TRP to heart you should have something better to do (i.e. your mission)

[–]AnneStaz10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dont be mean to her dude, I understand you may be offended but let that shit go. If you have that mentality you'll hurt yourself more often than not

[–]antidoxdevice11 points12 points  (12 children) | Copy

I know a revenge text is super tempting but best to avoid it. Just say you didnt feel you two clicked and youre kinda seeing someone right now that you like

[–]Jabbermouth12 points13 points  (7 children) | Copy

Never DEER. He owes her no explanation. Leave it on read and delete/block her number.

[–]antidoxdevice-1 points0 points  (6 children) | Copy

DEER?

[–]Jabbermouth12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

Defend, Explain (what you would be doing), Excuse, Rationalize

[–]Smuggler-Tuek15 points16 points  (4 children) | Copy

The fuck happened to this group...

[–]TacoMedic5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

Whilst I agree more people need to read the sidebar, I’m happier that more and more men are discovering TRP. Just because they don’t know basic acronyms (for us) doesn’t mean they don’t deserve to learn.

The more men begin to follow The teachings of TRP, the better. It shouldn’t just be some exclusive club.

[–]Smuggler-Tuek0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

They deserve to learn but Jesus what good is being here if they don’t go through the individual learning process? Newbies reading the sidebar and lurking more before joining in discussion would benefit the community greatly.

[–]dontmakemedebityou5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

dude stfu... asking for an acronym breakdown is harmless. you're making this sound like a cult.

[–]i-am-the-prize2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nah DEER vs DARE is level 101 RP and just reading it once will make DEER never mean the same thing again.

OP: https://archive.is/2hjQR

[–]Standgrounding[🍰] -1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

What's the worst outcome from sending a revenge text? I mostly understand why people just say "block her" but messing around is fun?

[–]antidoxdevice13 points14 points  (1 child) | Copy

If they know similar people she might make it public and the less gossip I have to endure the better

[–]TacoMedic7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly. Women will happily tell others when a dude comes off as butthurt. Men being butthurt = validation for women. But they WILL NEVER tell others when they’re straight up ignored.

[–]menial_optimist3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

My dad always said, "never burn your bridges" and I've found this to be generally true. It has it's limits though. E.g. "Don't burn your bridges" wouldn't apply in the scenario that you find your best friend fucking your wife. At that point, burning a bridge is the right thing to do. However, vindictive revenge texts and other petty behaviors only damage. The better person avoids child-like petty behavior. If I've learned anything from stoicism it's that the external judgements of others cannot harm your inner self, unless you let it. With this truth your inner self hardens into an adamantine shield. Not to advocate never being vulnerable though, because there are many situations where it's okay. It's sort of a realization that judgements from other people are external to the self, and really has nothing to do with the self.

[–]liquorbaron2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You did the right thing just leaving it on read. Just block her now.

[–]casemodz2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Try to get a free dinner out of it?

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Stay within your own frame.

[–]mrpoopistan2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Anyone fuck with them for your amusement?

That's usually my jam, but the ones who come back to the well aren't a lot of fun. They're just sad.

I had a girl from HS hit me up a few years ago, and it was mostly just weird. I went with "I'm seeing someone" as my out, and she pretty much interrogated me as to whether it was a proper GF-BF relationship or if it was something she could step in between. Eventually, I stopped replying because it was all just weird and sad.

[–]PayneGreyWolf6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

lol fuck that bitch. In your shoes I probably couldn't resist the urge to send some slick shit, but leaving her on read is probably the best thing to do. Basically her fat ass hit the wall and the last time she saw you she viewed you as a beta provider/nice guy. Now that she's forced to settle because she's going into her 30s fat and isn't getting the attention from guys that she used to (and doesn't have many stable options) she's hoping you still have some feelings for her.

[–]hrm08945 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

All while hitting up other dudes to see what her best option is. Don't feel bad for these used up skanks.

[–]ppanthero1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

No response was the right response. You answered your problem correctly yourself.

[–]Pelikahn1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's best left simply at "read". She will get the hint, and worst case scenario she sends you childish anger outlash text messages that you can share for laughs and as a warning to less experienced men.

[–]FleshPanda1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This happens to me every six months or so. Some chick from years past sees I'm successful and his me up wanting a free ride. Hard pass.

[–]Myagooshki40041 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Ask her "are you still fat". Have her send pics for verification. Tada.

[–]redepicw1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Leave it at that. Sending a snappy hurtful text is a low value move. You can do much better.

[–]jrr6415sun4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don’t call her fat that’s just being mean for no reason

[–]Lib-Tears-in-my-cup3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Pump and dump just for the giggles.

[–]whammyface1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

“I pursued you for a long time and You had your chance and now that the male attention is drying up you’re trying to drink from An old well. I’m not your plan b. Best of luck.”

[–]Spaghetti17761 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

“Because you’re only hitting me up because you’re almost thirty and you’re looks are going to go down the drain pretty soon.”

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]Jabbermouth7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

The best time to block her was yesterday, the second best time is now. ~ Abraham Lincoln

[–]hoopingblob0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just block her and delete her number.

[–]ImplodedVeggies0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

“I think we are focused on different goals”

“We are on different paths”

“A lots changed”

Or just don’t respond, where the hell is your abundance

[–]SemperPrimus0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

just say youre seeing someone

[–]L0nerizm0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don’t see how being a dick to her accomplishes anything

[–]huey7640 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Who cares if she thinks you are butthurt. As long as you arent actually butthurt, say what you want.

[–]smirk_addict0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She communicated to you that you weren’t a priority to her. That you had low value or she just took your interest for granted. Which is what girls do. Now she’s reaching out to you because her options are dwindling down as she approaches the wall and she hopes you don’t remember how she treated you before. You could’ve checked on this for her to even have the nerve to reach out to you. At least she’d know you’re not some chump that lets that shit ride. Or you could’ve just blocked her number. But you want to make a comment about her being fat? Come on dude. If that’s where you mind is at I’d just leave it alone.

[–]XT3M30 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

why would anyone with options even entertain this?

[–]ThisIsWhyTrumpWins0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

“No means no. Respect my bodily autonomy.”

[–]CanadaIsC0ld0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just be plain and honest without being rude. I have found this to work perfect for me, no need to block any thot. I'd tell her "because depending on the last time I saw you I don't think I'd be attracted enough to you... Sorry"

[–]Meloxian0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Dick quick then dip

[–]AWALT990 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sorry for hijacking this post. Just wanted to share my story and also get some advice for pushing forward after a breakup. Me (34 M) recently came out of a nasty breakup with my ex (25 F) two months ago. Met online, chatted for a while and finally went on our first date. A few weeks later she came to my apartment. By the 2nd date she was sucking my dick like her life depended on it, deepthroating and all and she even let me cum in her mouth and she swallowed. I was kinda disgusted when she swallowed that quick but who cares I liked it. She made a comment that pissed me off, saying she doesn't like the taste of cum its too salty but mine isn't..I knew I was probably dealing with a slut but anyway. She didn't give it up that day since she had the period but eventually gave it up by the 3rd date. We became official 3 months later, didn't live together or anything. She had too many red flags which made me wonder why I would commit to someone like that. Unstable personality which she tends to blame on her abusive ex.. Of course they never blame themselves. We dated from December 2018 until September 2019. Things started deteriorating since May 2019, and I noticed she was pulling away being slightly cold, takes a lot of time responding to texts 8 hrs when she's at work and blaming in it on being busy..also withholding sexually.. I called her out on it - mistake. Then I told her over the phone that I wanted to end it. She said she doesn't want to and she asked to come here so we can mend things etc of course typical female manipulation she came here and promised she will change etc and me like a good beta gave her a chance.. 3 weeks later didn't notice much improvement. Waited for her to come here gave me a blowjob and fucked her ass till I tore it up and came inside etc I was mad af. After she left I told her it was over.. She said she knew I was gonna do that and asked if she can still come from time to time. I said yes but don't expect anything non-physical. She came on August 8 and before entering the apartment she freaked out and wanted to leave and told me she wasn't sure what my intentions were and she was afraid i was planning something lol straight up psycho and she ran towards the elevator panicking and shaking, she said she just wants to sit down at the lobby. We sat down for almost 3 hours complete waste of my time then she took an uber and went home. She never came again until begining of September. During that time all we were talking about is how she doesn't trust me and some horseshit, she is always projecting her abusive past onto me, which was something I noticed very early as a red flag but ignored. During the 1 month+ period we didn't see each other she sometimes initiated contact during that period but we would go 2 or 3 days without contact. Finally she came begining of September and by that time I guess we were both checked out of the relationship, few days later on September 13 she calls me in the morning while I was at work and started telling me your tone is aggressive and you are rude rn etc then we hung up. THIS is the interesting part. I sent her a text immediately telling her its over and I can't put up with her crap anymore. Then headed to a meeting shortly after. When I got out of the meeting there was still no response, I called her a few times- ask me why!! Then sent her other messages saying if u don't respond by 11am you are blocked and I don't wanna hear your voice again. Next thing I know is her blocking me on whatsapp lol. Then I go ahead and send her text messages saying why would u block me? And told her am coming to your work to grab coffee and talk about things- she freaked out calling me and panicking and telling me she called the police blah blah then she said she will call me after work. So she calls me at 5pm and asks if we can meet. I told her where to come, so we meet at a coffee shop and she says how scared she is etc same old crap. Then she went home and I went home. The next day she calls me asking if she can come to my house. So she comes and tells me the relationship is over, you eneded it yesterday and I agree I don't want a relationship with you after what you did yesterday. I said fine. I was calm af and didn't show any emotion. She then said she wants to be FWB ans asked if I wanted to fuck. I said no thanks maybe another time, it bruised her ego and she asked me are you sure? I said yes. But I'll let you know when I want. She said Ok. Then she left. We talked at night and I had a few drinks then went all beta over the phone telling her I don't want that FWB shit. Then she tried to convince me, eventually told her I will see. Next day I told her I will only be Ok with it if we were exclusive, she said Ok and we left it at that. At the point I was already in the gym for 2 weeks, lost 13lbs and continued focusing on my self, eating healthy, lifting, sleeping well etc then I took a week off work to go to California, before I left I texted her so we can meet up the Saturday after I came back, and asked her to confirm via text. She called me to wish me a good trip and said she will check her schedule at work and confirm. I said Ok. 4 days later, I had drunk called her at 5pm, she didn't answer, called again at 8pm she didn't answer as she was still at work. Alcohol tricked me into texting her saying why are u not answering all that crap and then told her forget about our fwb arrangement. She calls me shortly after and we talked for a bit then hung up. The next morning I send her a series of beta messages. Including screenshots of texts between me and my female cousin, who asked about how my relationship was, I told her we are no longer together etc and that since my dad's diagnosis I haven't been the same person and treated my gf bad and I rarely cry but I am crying because I could lose my dad at any time etc some bullshif beta stuff that I still don't understand why I sent. Anyway, she says are u sending me this to try and get back with me using your dad as an excuse. The drunk me said yes, from there we started an argument and she insults me and I insulted her back it was ugly, she then said I believe the screenshots were made up, u have free time in your hands and sitting there obsessing about me lol.. Anyway we end it there. Next day i call her and the same thing we get into an argument and she has a mental breakdown and gets her dad on the phone to ask me not to contact again. She blocked my number the same day. I then relapsed into my old drinking habits and start calling/texting from different numbers. I called and texted over a period of weeks every time while under the influence. She eventually changed her number. A week later I call her office and she didn't wanna talk -obviously. Now she's on that pedestal. I then threaten to call her family and tell them we had a sexual relationship. She comes from a religious family. So I call and spoke with her parents and told them. That same day they called my family and asked them to make me stop or they will go to the police. I stayed quite until two weeks later when I sent her an e-mail to her work e-mail. I fucking hate alcohol man. Makes me do some dumb shit. Anyway while I was randomly looking to see if they filed anything against me, I went online and looked up my name and saw that they tried to file for a peace order against me the same day they called my family but it was denied due to lack of sufficient evidence. Since then I cut the alcohol and just focusing on my self. It was quite an experience. This is not something that I would normally do, but this bitch has a way of making people act this way, what's funny is that her ex did the exact same thing but he took it a step further and went to her houss until her father and brother got involved. I should have heeded the message from the very begining when she was paranoid at the begining of the relationship and telling me about all the stories about her ex. What do you suggest now, going monk mode for a while and focus on myself, my job, and kicking addiction, staying in the gym etc and leave gaming women until I have stabilized a little bit and forgot this relationship. It seems I secretly developed onitis in the process without even noticing. Onitis is a bitch man. I have been very distracted at work and life in general, it seems that this hoe was taking a lot of my time and I somehow became a codependent bitch! Whats your advice in getting over this quickly and move on?

[–]lazydogg90 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

" The same reason you didn't wanna meet last time when I asked you."

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Going through exes now that she's hitting the wall?

Exactly.

"Fuck.... getting old..... I know! Jim! Jim wasn't so bad! He always respected me.... he'd be happy to settle down with me.... I wouldn't even have to have sex with him very much, he did always say that love is the most important thing........ Hi Jim, how's it going?"

I want to say "Because you were fat last time I saw you" or "Because I don't fuck fat girls" but then it looks like I'm butthurt and trying to get back at her for denying me a year earlier.

Haha..... or "I really like you and we'd be great together... and I know that many men really like BBW's, but I'm sorry I'm just not into that".

Anyone fuck with them for your amusement?

I would, so long as I'm free from any social repercussions.

[–]ChadTheWaiter1000 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Tell her all that extra poundage has tipped her over the scale to exceed your weight limit.

[–]AWALT990 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sorry for hijacking this post. Just wanted to share my story and also get some advice for pushing forward after a breakup.

Me (34 M) recently came out of a nasty breakup with my ex (25 F) two months ago.Met online, chatted for a while and finally went on our first date. A few weeks later she came to my apartment. By the 2nd date she was sucking my dick like her life depended on it, deepthroating and all and she even let me cum in her mouth and she swallowed.

I was kinda disgusted when she swallowed that quick but who cares I liked it. She made a comment that pissed me off, saying she doesn't like the taste of cum its too salty but mine isn't..I knew I was probably dealing with a slut but anyway. She didn't give it up that day since she had the period but eventually gave it up by the 3rd date.

We became official 3 months later, didn't live together or anything. She had too many red flags which made me wonder why I would commit to someone like that. Unstable personality which she tends to blame on her abusive ex.. Of course they never blame themselves.

We dated from December 2018 until September 2019. Things started deteriorating since May 2019, and I noticed she was pulling away being slightly cold, takes a lot of time responding to texts 8 hrs when she's at work and blaming in it on being busy..also withholding sexually.. I called her out on it - mistake.

Then I told her over the phone that I wanted to end it. She said she doesn't want to and she asked to come here so we can mend things etc of course typical female manipulation she came here and promised she will change etc and me like a good beta gave her a chance.. 3 weeks later didn't notice much improvement. Waited for her to come here gave me a blowjob and fucked her ass till I tore it up and came inside etc I was mad af.

After she left I told her it was over.. She said she knew I was gonna do that and asked if she can still come from time to time. I said yes but don't expect anything non-physical.

She came on August 8 and before entering the apartment she freaked out and wanted to leave and told me she wasn't sure what my intentions were and she was afraid i was planning something lol straight up psycho and she ran towards the elevator panicking and shaking, she said she just wants to sit down at the lobby.

We sat down for almost 3 hours complete waste of my time then she took an uber and went home. She never came again until begining of September. During that time all we were talking about is how she doesn't trust me and some horseshit, she is always projecting her abusive past onto me, which was something I noticed very early as a red flag but ignored.

During the 1 month+ period we didn't see each other she sometimes initiated contact during that period but we would go 2 or 3 days without contact. Finally she came begining of September and by that time I guess we were both checked out of the relationship, few days later on September 13 she calls me in the morning while I was at work and started telling me your tone is aggressive and you are rude rn etc then we hung up. THIS is the interesting part.

I sent her a text immediately telling her its over and I can't put up with her crap anymore. Then headed to a meeting shortly after. When I got out of the meeting there was still no response, I called her a few times- ask me why!! Then sent her other messages saying if u don't respond by 11am you are blocked and I don't wanna hear your voice again. Next thing I know is her blocking me on whatsapp lol.

Then I go ahead and send her text messages saying why would u block me? And told her am coming to your work to grab coffee and talk about things- she freaked out calling me and panicking and telling me she called the police blah blah then she said she will call me after work. So she calls me at 5pm and asks if we can meet. I told her where to come, so we meet at a coffee shop and she says how scared she is etc same old crap.

Then she went home and I went home. The next day she calls me asking if she can come to my house. So she comes and tells me the relationship is over, you eneded it yesterday and I agree I don't want a relationship with you after what you did yesterday. I said fine. I was calm af and didn't show any emotion. She then said she wants to be FWB ans asked if I wanted to fuck. I said no thanks maybe another time, it bruised her ego and she asked me are you sure? I said yes.

But I'll let you know when I want. She said Ok. Then she left. We talked at night and I had a few drinks then went all beta over the phone telling her I don't want that FWB shit. Then she tried to convince me, eventually told her I will see. Next day I told her I will only be Ok with it if we were exclusive, she said Ok and we left it at that.

At the point I was already in the gym for 2 weeks, lost 13lbs and continued focusing on my self, eating healthy, lifting, sleeping well etc then I took a week off work to go to California, before I left I texted her so we can meet up the Saturday after I came back, and asked her to confirm via text. She called me to wish me a good trip and said she will check her schedule at work and confirm. I said Ok.

4 days later, I had drunk called her at 5pm, she didn't answer, called again at 8pm she didn't answer as she was still at work. Alcohol tricked me into texting her saying why are u not answering all that crap and then told her forget about our fwb arrangement. She calls me shortly after and we talked for a bit then hung up. The next morning I send her a series of beta messages.

Including screenshots of texts between me and my female cousin, who asked about how my relationship was, I told her we are no longer together etc and that since my dad's diagnosis I haven't been the same person and treated my gf bad and I rarely cry but I am crying because I could lose my dad at any time etc some bullshif beta stuff that I still don't understand why I sent.

Anyway, she says are u sending me this to try and get back with me using your dad as an excuse. The drunk me said yes, from there we started an argument and she insults me and I insulted her back it was ugly, she then said I believe the screenshots were made up, u have free time in your hands and sitting there obsessing about me lol.. Anyway we end it there. Next day i call her and the same thing we get into an argument and she has a mental breakdown and gets her dad on the phone to ask me not to contact again.

She blocked my number the same day. I then relapsed into my old drinking habits and start calling/texting from different numbers. I called and texted over a period of weeks every time while under the influence. She eventually changed her number. A week later I call her office and she didn't wanna talk -obviously.

Now she's on that pedestal. I then threaten to call her family and tell them we had a sexual relationship. She comes from a religious family. So I call and spoke with her parents and told them. That same day they called my family and asked them to make me stop or they will go to the police. I stayed quite until two weeks later when I sent her an e-mail to her work e-mail.

I fucking hate alcohol man. Makes me do some dumb shit. Anyway while I was randomly looking to see if they filed anything against me, I went online and looked up my name and saw that they tried to file for a peace order against me the same day they called my family but it was denied due to lack of sufficient evidence.

Since then I cut the alcohol and just focusing on my self. It was quite an experience. This is not something that I would normally do, but this bitch has a way of making people act this way, what's funny is that her ex did the exact same thing but he took it a step further and went to her houss until her father and brother got involved.

I should have heeded the message from the very begining when she was paranoid at the begining of the relationship and telling me about all the stories about her ex.

What do you suggest now, going monk mode for a while and focus on myself, my job, and kicking addiction, staying in the gym etc and leave gaming women until I have stabilized a little bit and forgot this relationship. It seems I secretly developed onitis in the process without even noticing. Onitis is a bitch man. I have been very distracted at work and life in general, it seems that this hoe was taking a lot of my time and I somehow became a codependent bitch! Whats your advice in getting over this quickly and move on?

[–]anxiousdweller0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Do what makes you truly happy. That is to say, be honest with her, and then accept and love yourself regardless of her reaction. You simply tell her, "Two years ago you went cold. I initiated a year later and you didn't want to meet. Now that it seems you're out of options you are asking me to hang again but it seems like you're only using me, and I'm not interested in people who don't love themselves or don't love me."

You need the ability to be honest with and conscious of yourself. Discover and admit your true motivations. Accept that they are in you… and keep working to practice the teachings you know are good and which you need in order to fill up your points of lacking.

Live for yourself, and be honest. Other top-voted commenters here who are talking about how your reply will seem need to ask themselves why their advice includes being concerned about that.

[–]MVWeiss0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

29 is one year away from 30 which is 10 years away from 40 which is like vaginal death. Tell her you're not into GILFs

[–]menial_optimist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You have no way of knowing what she looks like now. She could have realized she was letting herself go and hit the gym. Its easy to lose 20 pounds in 2 years. Don't stalk her social media pics either because even if she is fat, all the pics will be specifically chosen to make it appear that she isn't. If you thought she was a good lay before, perhaps meet up with her for coffee. If you are unattracted to her, stay for the courtesy chat for 1-2 hours to "catch up" and then exchange pleasantries and say goodbye. Also, if your frame was solid I think you wouldn't be that butthurt as you seem because she went cold years before. This shouldn't be a "how do I get my revenge" type of scenario.

[–]PiperBigBell-5 points-4 points  (3 children) | Copy

This sounds like an attempt to feel superior to her. But where does it end. Do you want her to cry over you? Stalk you? Be jealous. Then what?

If you can text her back with the right spirit, just be honest and say I'm not interested in being second best, and I'm not interested in taking what is no longer the best you have to offer. If she asks more questions give her no hope and be straight. Just be cold and icy.

As men we don't stoop to women's level. We maintain our frame and don't seep into emotionalism

[–]Jabbermouth9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

say I’m not interested in being second best and I’m not interested in taking what is no longer the best you have to offer

This is gay. You are starting to DEER. Never DEER. Ignore the text and leave it on read. He owes her no explanation. No need to be ‘cold and icy’.

[–]PiperBigBell-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are correct. He owes her no explanation. But he wants to respond. Why? Because he wants something from her. The best she had to offer, or an admission that she fucked through her suffering. Both of which are unlikely or bad ideas. So if he's gonna respond. I think he should do it with honesty and tact. No leaving room for a discussion.

[–]dasani70 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Your whole response to her is emotional

[–]Standgrounding[🍰] -2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Send the "you're fat" text for lulzies and tell the story on Reddit.

[–]redxpeace-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fuck it just do it.

Send the i don't fuck fat chicks text

[–]Kingdionethethird-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

My ex never really had the opportunity to reach out. Blocked on every platform and changed my number.

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy

[removed]

[–]rambler429-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

You need professional counseling.

[–]alioshakaramazov0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you explain why I'll look after it.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2021. All rights reserved.

created by /u/dream-hunter