Hello!

Hope everyone is having a fantastic day!

So, I got married 5 months ago and I was the last one of my friends to get married. So, each of my friends would tell me how their lives and relationships are going and how things were so amazing is in the start and how everything becomes dull even in 6 months.

What I noticed in all of them was that the efforts to keep yourself happy and maintained was decreasing and my friends would get too comfortable with the guy. For example, one of my friends went out of her way to buy the kind of dresses that her man liked and invested a lot in her looks, her accessories, makup etc. When I met her after an year of marriage, she was almost unrecognizable:

  • She was wearing a dress that she told me that her husband hated (and she dosen’t give a damn abt what he thinks)
  • She was not maintained at all (underarms, legs) and when I asked her, she told me its too much work.

Similarly, I noticed that my friends would complain about many small stuffs that doesn’t even seem to matter (at least from my POV) but they would be genuinely upset over them.

So, before I got married, I took vows for myself as well:

  • I would not become lazy. I would keep myself and my surroundings clean and maintain a standard of living.
  • I would strive to be like a lady. Know the skills that would make me and my husband happy (in bed, in kitchen, when going out).
  • Practice minimalism and focus on what is important.
  • Dress up nicely, smell good, keep good hairstyle, good skin, manicure and pedicure etc.
  • Not complaining all the time.

Now, after 5 months, I noticed that I have become lazy. My room is disorganized. Things don’t smell fresh. Room looks dull and lifeless. Everything sucks. And I can’t stop complaning about every small thing.

I tried to bounce back, but I’m not able to. I m currently searching for a job and it has been hectic. But I don’t want a hectic life to be an excuse of living a sad, disorganized and shabby life. I have become what I vowed to never become.

Has it ever happened to you? Is it like “post-marriage depression” or something? How do you deal with this? Tough Love is welcomed, as long as I get some insights.

Thanks in advance