I have a date tonight with a higher SMV girl than I’m used to. More than likely will fail, so what are some “exercises” I can apply to this date so that I can develop a stronger frame in future dates?

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[deleted]
December 7, 2019
63 upvotes

Ok so yesterday morning I made a post.... that for the most part when into different directions.. to say the least. It was basically a post saying it’s happened a couple times where I’ll fuck a girl, and she’ll say shit like “I wasn’t expecting you to be so dominant” or “why I thought you were soft and innocent to be honest”.

But the 80% of the post turned into a debate as to why I shouldn’t be eating pussy and according to some people I’m going to die of cancer.... starting to believe some of you are MGTOW virgins on here.

But to get the point, I did get some solid advice. Basically my personality isn’t congruent with sex life. As admittedly I’m a very much a beta, and still suffer from poor social skills and not being dominant and at times spineless. Despite going on maybe 20-25 first dates only 10 of them resulted in body counts. Most of them 4s and 5s. One being a 6 and the best being 7,

Tonight I’m going out with a higher SMV than I’m used to. She’s white, blonde, 5’8 in height, lifts and has a good body, etc. seems average to you all I’m sure but here in south Texas in the Valley where I’m surrounded by short chubby Hispanic girls mostly it’s pretty rare.

I want this date to be first in where I begin to develop a stronger and more dominant personality/frame. Now I’ve already failed with this date seeing as how I’m already sure I’ll fail and I’m making a “what to do” post here in asktrp. But at the very least I can make this into an exercise. Here I problems I have that I’ve reflected on thanks to yesterday’s post:

  1. I stick to safe topics. Mostly talk about work, family, school, etc. have a hard time speaking on an emotional level and don’t know how to sexualize the convo.

  2. Can’t speak smoothly. Feel like at times a make too much pauses to think about what I’m going to say.

  3. I spent the whole date self conscious as to whether or not I’m entertaining the person. Tbh, I feel like this with everyone. Guy or girl, friend or family, etc. When I’m with another person I feel like I’m putting on a performance at all times and I’m afraid I’m boring them.

  4. I suck at continuing the convo. I’m constantly saying “yeah” or “oh yeah?” After the other person has said something. At this point I’m annoying myself.

5 I’ve still yet to become the prize. I haven’t lifted and developed enough muscles, haven’t gotten great at guitar, mostly go to work and go school. At 21 (22 tomorrow) I haven’t gotten my shit together and am mediocre in every aspect.

  1. I spend too much mental energy worried it the night will end with me getting laid, since tbh that’s all I care about at the end of the day. Not looking for a LTR or getting know another deeply anymore.

So that’s what I can think of. It’s a lot I know, I just need advice from you on whatever you can.


Post Information
Title I have a date tonight with a higher SMV girl than I’m used to. More than likely will fail, so what are some “exercises” I can apply to this date so that I can develop a stronger frame in future dates?
Author [deleted]
Upvotes 63
Comments 89
Date 07 December 2019 04:06 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/298203
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/e7g0vo/i_have_a_date_tonight_with_a_higher_smv_girl_than/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
betaframelong term relationshipsexual market valuedominanceMGTOW
Comments

[–][deleted]  (11 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]kollegah133732 points33 points  (10 children) | Copy

The reason you only say ''yeah'' is because you're not actually listening.

This.

Had that too.

[–][deleted][S] 1 point2 points  (9 children) | Copy

How did you fix it? Would like some strong advise on this cause I’m beginning to annoy myself with it

[–]Snowaey24 points25 points  (1 child) | Copy

Make an effort to actually listen maybe?

[–]acaliforniaburrito2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lol 🤦🏻‍♂️

[–]TheDero18 points19 points  (4 children) | Copy

I have alot of experience conquering this "brain fog" in social interactions. I'm no fuckin doctor, but imo it can stem from alot of things such as ADHD, poor sleep, and overall low social skills. Let me repeat that, being a good listener and talker is a SKILL. It may come naturally to some, sure. Just like anything else.

Don't think about your time with her as a chess game. Personally, I would always be thinking like five steps in advance. "Ok, she's saying this right now, what's going to be a good response to this? Should I laugh? Yeah I'll laugh and then hopefully she responds with this..." blah blah fuckin blah, I'm positive most of you guys can relate to this.

Focus on the words she's saying. Watch her lips as she talks briefly. This will hone you in on what she's saying, and its also a great escalation move if done sparsely and naturally.

Be present. Focus on your senses. Whats the restaurant smell like? How does she smell? Listen for details. Her tone. The trick is to constantly remind yourself to be fucking present until it becomes natural. It will take practice. This is what cured it for me.

[–]rockyp321 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That way of thinking is the thinking of someone that’s in a bad mindset. Most of us think like that when we’re insecure but u can’t enjoy a conversation if ur thinking like that. Wanna fix brain fog and ADHD?? SR and no fap willl get rid of most of it then make sure to get good sleep. Then after that you just gotta take action cause even tho you won’t be ADHD or anxious now ur just socially dumb but no anxious lol so u still gotta learn the skills

[–][deleted][S] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yes, that chess analogy I can relate to 100%, but it seems most TRPers can’t and were socially skilled before they found TRP on some level. Whereas my socials skills are a 1 on a scale from 1-10.

Yeah I guess being present, and erasing expectations, is something I’m going to have to work on. I just wish there was a step by step guide to this bullshit, cause I can’t do it by myself

[–]TheDero1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You can do it by yourself. Start small like anything else. If there was a step by step guide life wouldn't be very fun, don't be afraid of fucking up and looking like a dork. No one is perfect. You learn the most when you challenge yourself.

[–]2ComplexProjection1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You are a primate, a naturally skilled animal at socializing. There are no hidden rules that others secretly master. Interact with her. Be pleasant, enjoy her personality, have fun. That’s all there is, really. The less you think about it, the more natural and nice it will feel.

[–]rockyp32-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I know how you feel. The easiest advice to retain and go on no fap. That way when ur actually with a female a lot of that shit will be come out naturally. You’ll feel like 10x more attraction for her and honestly that’s what mostly get them attracted to you when they see that desire in your body language. Not the needy body language but just a subtle one and luckily your body will do alll the work for you so that’s by far the best thing you can do is to go on no fap. Ur on a short timeframe so focus on making intense eye contact and think about your desire for her well ur doing it allow yourself to feel the attraction don’t try to hide it show it boldly. Legit focus on what she’s saying don’t put energy into your insecurities that’ll take ur attention away from what’s she’s saying... ALSO MAN UR FUCKING 22 don’t beat yourself up for not being perfect man your on the right path people in here act like u gotta have evrything right in a year like bro be realistic

[–]anicebigrodforyou194 points195 points  (30 children) | Copy

Saying you will fail is the faggiest thing I’ve ever heard. You’ve got a date with her so she is not higher value than you. Stop being a pussy and treat her like any other girl.

[–]Tousen7126 points27 points  (0 children) | Copy

This.

Didn’t even read the rest of the post past “I will probably fail.”

[–]Heybuddyyyyyy3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

MJ used to visualize how he would dominant his opponents before his games. You are doing the opposite. Setting yourself up for failure.

[–][deleted][S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

So I should visualize dominating this chick before I go on the date?

[–]Heybuddyyyyyy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yes and it being a good fun date...and you not busting a nut in 5 secs but rather hulk smashing

[–][deleted][S] 11 points12 points  (24 children) | Copy

That’s the problem, the way I’ve treated any other girl so far has resulted in mostly no 2nd dates and getting ghosted. I need a different game plan cause clearly it ain’t working. Again, 10 lays, 25 first dates this past year.

[–]Hungboy696942014 points15 points  (8 children) | Copy

Again, 10 lays, 25 first dates this past year.

you realize this probably puts you in the top 5-10% of men statistically?

[–]RanaMahal9 points10 points  (7 children) | Copy

yeah i think he’s doing pretty good so far, but he seems to think guys on here are fucking all 25/25 of them and occasionally dropping 1 date every so often.

i had the same problem a while back where i was bitching about only 1 new plate to fuck every 2 weeks, and people told me i was being an idiot cuz people aren’t getting new plates tossed into their lap every day

[–]Hungboy69694201 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I saw a study/survey that had 4 women or more a year as the top 20%. Anyone above that number (even if you think it's slightly off) should be atleast content

[–]theyearsstartcomin0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Depends on the setting. 4 a month would be low for me during school. Outside once youre working and banged enough thots whats one more worth as long as youve got some that are consistent?

More than booze, whorehunting was a much bigger drag on my goals in terms of time spent on it. Just not productive

[–]Hungboy69694200 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Agreed it gets old and meaningless quickly

[–]mountainbiker1780 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Holy shit. I don't suppose you can link that study/survey? I had assumed I was just doing "ok", but if what you're saying is true, I'm actually doing pretty good

[–]thesoloronin0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I had this same problem the other time. I got 2 dates with a HB7, which is still a first in my books. Date 1 was just a coffee date and Date 2 was a movie + drinks date. Then she never gave me another date past that. I’ll do a new post about this later on. Guess I need some pointers here as well.

[–]Hungboy69694200 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Gotta go way quicker than that bud. I'm guessing there was little to no escalation in those dates

[–]thesoloronin0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm guessing there was little to no escalation in those dates

Well, I'd say yeah and pretty much my fault there. Considering that her boyfriend is away in another country.
I guess I had ONE shot during the movies for intimacy escalation and I fucking blew it.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (3 children) | Copy

Jesus. You need to learn to love and believe in yourself. You’ve lost this date before going on it. Grab your balls and start acting like a man until you can figure out how to be a man. Read the fucking sidebar.

[–][deleted][S] -2 points-1 points  (2 children) | Copy

How can one believe in himself when he fails most of the time?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Failing most of the time isn't failing all of the time, which means you are successful in at least a few areas. Focus on playing to your strengths in those areas where you're not failing, building momentum (i.e. harnessing the power of small wins) on these small wins, and then keep building on your successes.

It seems like there is a significant disconnect between your results and how you view yourself. You've banged 10/25 chicks, so you're doing something right. Maybe you feel like an impostor or that you're not "alpha" enough, but the women you're fucking are still choosing to fuck you so I don't see a problem.

As an example, when I started wrestling, I couldn't hit a high c to save my life, but I could blast double just about anyone because of my experience as a linebacker. Guess what? I focused on my blast double while working on my foot work and inside tie to move my opponent into position and hit a high c. Eventually I could hit a high c on most of my opponents.

This shit takes time, so keep at it. Translation: keep banging 4s and 5s and keep asking out higher quality women. Eventually, it will click and you'll look back and laugh at this post. Also, you'd probably benefit from therapy to figure out why you have no self-esteem. Women don't spread their legs unless they see something that they like.

[–]hoopingblob24 points25 points  (4 children) | Copy

Scream at yourself

"I am the shit! Every girl is lucky to be with me! Nothing can bring me down! I am sexy, handsome and amazing!"

Over and over again

[–]2319Skew37 points38 points  (1 child) | Copy

Helps if you do this while holding your cock near a playground

[–]febreze_air_freshner11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

ohhhhh so that's what my uncle was doing

[–]Endorsed ContributorWe_Are_Legion4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Utter nonsense.

Affirmations you don't believe produce internal conflict and guilt. They are no substitute for the real thing.

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K180 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly. Just staring at the mirror and talking to yourself doesn't change shit.

The only affirmations that are effective are affirmations that you already believe on an internal level.

Basic affirmations are bluepill horseshit.

[–]Self-honest2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Bro that is decent success rate. Quit bitching. Quit being a bitch. Just go live your life and stop worrying about other people. It gets better just keep putting the work in.

[–]thrwy754795 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

10 lays, 25 first dates this past year

This is great. You're not giving yourself enough credit.

About 2 hours before you go out tonight, get a pen, and blank paper. Spend 10 minutes repeatedly saying to yourself, and writing down, "I am God's gift to women." Say it, and write it with full intention, and only take quick breaks if your hand hurts.

About 30 minutes before heading out, close your eyes, and spend 15 minutes visualizing yourself successfully flirting with the girl, getting her to bed, and fucking the shit out of her.

Be as detailed as possible with your visualization. What is she wearing? What are the sounds, the smells, what does her skin feel like? Immerse yourself.

Then, head out with maximum confidence, and strong, masculine posture, and smooth movements. Good luck.

[–]DeadInTheFace6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yea, uhm. Just think about how her shit smells just as bad as yours

[–]LordFa91 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Tip #1: Always assume attraction

Tip #2: Think in terms of whether you can a tactical victory. You may not get laid or even her to agree to a 2nd date. But you can use it as a stepping stone to build your confidence or even reframe it as exposure theraphy

[–]11-Eleven-111 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Quit listening to these morons when they call you something like a fag for being nervous to go on a date with a hot girl. Whoever said that is fucking retard and I wouldn't be surprised if he's never been on a date in life.

You know what the faggiest shit to do would be? Not getting nervous. Cuz than you probably would be gay. Its seriously ok to get nervous. And if you mess up than so what? You're just not used being around women that attractive and thats ok. You're going to get a date with one this time and you can do it again.

Here's why you won't mess up. She said yes already. Hot women don't go on dates they don't want to. So just be yourself and have fun. Don't worry about being too dominant. She might like it she might not. Just have fun and quit worrying about it.

[–]SalporinRP26 points27 points  (4 children) | Copy

If you're already convincing yourself you're going to fail then might as well not even go.

Have some fuckin confidence dude.

[–][deleted][S] 4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

Look I’ve gone into dates being fully confident (especially in the beginning when I started getting laid), and have failed spectacularly. And I’ve gone expecting to fail and ended up taking a girl’s virginity.

Yeah you can say “might as well not go if you’re going to fail”, but that’ll be a huge waste of an lesson learning experience.

[–]oldertybasterd8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

So you failed before and are going on another date. See it’s not the end of the world. If it fails there’s more girls out there. If you going with the mindset you’re going to fail you’re just setting yourself up to fail

[–]SalporinRP2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

No I said if you're already convincing yourself you're going to fail then don't go. Dating girls is supposed to be fun. Why go into it with a negative mindset like that.

Just have some confidence, go, and see where the date goes. Worst case scenario some girl doesn't like you. Who cares?

[–]Snowaey1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Being fully confident is still better than being in the hopeless virgin mentality

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dude fix number 6, thats youre biggest problem. Relax!

[–]COLIE5316 points17 points  (1 child) | Copy

Be more like the guy who created the username. Who gives a fuck, just go out and entertain yourself and let her follow along. Your overthinking it, if your nervous take her to a coffee shop near a sex shop. Go for an aimless walk with her then stumble upon sex shop. Slap her around with a 4 foot dildo in the store and ask the cashier if they can custom order drilldos. Point is dont be ordinary. Give her a story to tell her friends, give her shit to brag about. Her friends will spit game for you with all their questions.

That dinner date shit is for accountants and vacuum salesman. Take her to bingo like a fuckin Chad and game all the old ladies. Get her to describe her plans to rob the corner store you guys are sitting near. Jesus just dont take her for a drink until after you give her some shit to talk about. Drinks are for closers.

[–]mickey__0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I like you man

[–]IXseed9 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy

She thinks she has lower SMV than you, or else she wouldn't had gone on the date in the first place. Keep that in mind. YOU are the prize. It's HER job to impress YOU! Make her show YOU her interest. Just sit back and chill in ur frame.

It sounds like you're just way too much in your head around her. Remember again, you're the prize! Just show up hang out and have fun. You're thinking you gotta do all these things to get her to fuck you. That's not how it works.

You ARE the prize regardless of your body, your job, whatever, because you're a fucking MAN! You're going places. You doing shit with your life. You building your empire.

Edit: Also about worrying about getting laid, don't. Your job is just to push to sex, but it's not a requirement to HAVE sex. Does that make sense? TBH unless she's showing signs of high interests, she prolly wont. So don't trip.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]IXseed1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That too. I'm just trying to keep him from thinking that he's below her when she doesn't believe that.

Unless she's using him for a night but let's not think about that

[–]graffix135 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Have a don't give a fuck attitude. Pretty simple. Treat her like you would a 3.

[–]lookoutitscaleb3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Some things that I think are important are exercises in your daily life. I think tbh you're skipping to the end. Worrying about what you can do on the date is still a "wrong" mindset. The problems won't be fixed until you fix yourself.

Lift, meditate, eat right. Build confidence. The only way you will do that is by doing what you know you want to be. Build yourself into the man you want to be. To do that you HAVE to do the work every day. Consistency is key. If you go to the gym and hit crazy PR's and lift an insane amount of weight that day, but never go again. There is no value. But if you lift like a pussy, every single day, slowly adding weight, at the end of the year you'll have lifted soooo much weight. Same thing with eating healthy. You eat one salad who gives a fuck. If your diet is consistent and you're constantly putting nutrients in your body it will take effect.

I would seriously put more effort into yourself rather than using the environment of dating as an excuse to not focus on your goals. Which it sounds like you don't know what those are outside of the dating world. And how do you do that? Focus on yourself. It's not about getting ripped and being the best guitarist. It's about taking those steps to becoming that man every day. One day you look in the mirror and are happy with what you see. BUT it's not the end. You haven't made it. You'll have put in so much work that you can't stop here. This is just the beginning.

Have you read the Book of Pook? Also Models by Mark Manson is really good too. Helps to put things into perspective of YOU not the dating world and being a success with women. Start there imo.

[–][deleted][S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Update: Just came back from the date and I indeed did fail. Oh well, hope these next 2 dates I have set up go better.

[–]anxiousdweller2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Female SMV is in your head.

[–]Siah_Sefid1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like you're a 'nice guy'. Try 'no more Mr nice guy' by Robert Glover.

Glover explains, a few things classify you as a nice guy and you have mentioned these.

  • toxic shame. You think you are inherently not good enough.

  • afraid to show your sexuality

[–]KidGrizz1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yo just be confident. This bitch is not a queen and her pussy is not gold. If u don’t get it fuck it. Don’t be a bitch about it. Go have fun! I would say be yourself but u acting like a bitch. Be a confident man!

[–][deleted][S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Even after reading the sidebars, all the TRP books, I’ve still yet to figure out how to be a confident man. It just seems like a foreign concept to me. Like my brain isn’t allowing me to apply it or something. How does be a confident man exactly?

[–]JurJur1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You already failed

[–]Irtotallynotrobot1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Realize that an attractive woman cannot do anything that an average girl can't. She walks, talks, fucks just like the rest. "Smv" is an ambiguous rank that other people give her, it's meaningless.

[–]Psychological_Radish1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't despair. In my experience, hotter girls are actually easier to bang than average girls.

The average girl has a lot more to lose. A hoe is unattractive enough, but an ugly hoe is pretty much the bottom of the barrel. They have to hang on to whatever value they do have. Consequently they're much more suspicious of your intentions and more difficult to bed.

7+ are more comfortable with sexuality. I also find hotter girls to be more pleasant company in general. As with all things, YMMV, but it's for this reason that I've stopped wasting my time with any girl below a 7. Go get em.

[–]wz30 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just have fun and see it as getting experience (almost like a video game). You're hella young. You've already identified your weak points, it'll take time to work on them. Be patient.

Also look into meditation to get in control of your thoughts, feelings (anxiety, worry) and to stay calm.

[–]Rhino49100 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You should read or listen to How to Win Friends and Influence people, that will help you become a better conversationalist.

If you keep thinking about sex on the first date and it’s making you nervous and fuck up the date then just drop it and focus on having a good time the first time you see her. People always talk on here about fucking on the first date but it’s not really the norm for most guys. At this point I would suggest just playing it cool and have fun with her, then take it from there.

[–]RedKepler0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Well, you saying shes higher smv is already pedestalling- so an easy way to get round that is to imagine her shitting a turd high on water content everytime you say that, and anything else to 'dent' that thinking of pedestalling.

To try give any answer to 1, 2, 3, 4 , 5 and 6.

1- safe convos are alright, as long as they're interesting. Just keep them relevant, and think of how conversations which you had with girls you laid went in comparison to the ones in which uou didn't- but of course if there is no glaringly obvious problem, drown that hamster.

2- if your pausing, try instead to change it up perhaps with taking a drink, for example. Other than that, it's all practice and if its more so because the conversation is one you are not so attune to or interested in, guide it away to one that you are.

3- again, it's just practice, if your going to give an answer or tell an anecdote, get straight to the point, and lead it up with another question or proposition etc.

4- again practice, if the conversation is going alright, then relax. All yeahs, etc are encouragement and you telling them your listening, it's just balance that. To show if your listening as well, repeat what they said to clarify or ask a question.

5- Rome wasn't built in a day

6- Well, if that is your aim your constantly thinking about and that is putting you off, then your focusing too much on that and not the date in front of you.

[–]setsuna00 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bro you're the man. You are everything she needs and wants rn. Just be you but the best version. Everything will fall into place.

I never feel pressure on a date. Because I don't care the outcome

[–]nicyhasreddit0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Consider yourself out already. Don't even go, because from the looks of it you don't deserve the others either

[–]mountainofsnow0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Three H's: Hang out, Have fun, and Hook up.

  • Coach Corey Wayne

[–]jh18710 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She already said yes to the date, so getting laid is for you to lose. With that attitude, which couldn’t be more off, you shouldn’t even go. You got the date, youre gonna get the lay... this is the proper thought. But if you don’t, you’ve advanced the ball for a close on date 2. Outcome independence.

Just chat like a normal person, talk about all sorts of stuff and for the love of god don’t over think it. It’s one random girl, one random day. In a month it’ll be a distant memory. If you mess up, move on to the next.

“Seed the pull” by asking her what some of her fav shows are, talk about common shows and interests etc. at the end of the date/ having fun, ask her if she wants to go back to your place and watch xxx (show talked about earlier). Seeding the pull makes the pull to your place seem streamlined and innocent, even though you both know what it means.

[–]agjrpsl0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You make two posts in a matter of one day. What kind of beta pussy moma's boy are you. Jfc do you need us all to hold your hand as well? ....gtfo here

[–]VSelf470 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

My 2 cents from experience and things I’m applying to be better.

  1. Kino and don’t be afraid to sexualize the convo. “How are those squats coming along?” Or some shit.

  2. Learned from Dale Carniege. Practice making a full stop between words. You sound a lot more confident, will serve for work a lot more than dates.

  3. This is a mentality. Always assume attraction. You are the prize. You are going on a four for YOU not her. If it stops being fun just call the check or leave. YOU ARE NOT HER ENTERTAINER, she gets to have fun through you.

  4. Keep quiet. Silence works wonders. And actually listen.

  5. See number 3.

  6. Develop you social muscle and remember you don’t hace to tolerate boring people.

A lot of this comes from IDGAF mentallity.

[–]YouWannaPutMoneyOnIt0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Not assume her smv is higher*

[–]mickey__0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

happy birthday mate, lill soon

[–]Spaghetti17760 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bro don’t even think about it that much just pee on her.

[–]jon940 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Stop talking to us. Go to the gym. Get your pump on. Go home, shower, go out with the hot chick that’s into you. Have fun. Stop overthinking it.

[–]abomba240 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just reading the title man it's all about IDGAF attitude, no matter the unicorn. No pussy deserves a pedestal, you're the prize

[–]Boddicker060 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Be comfortable in those silences or lulls in the conversation. Keep eye contact during them. They will flip from being a negative to a positive in her eyes and you’ll appear dominant by doing that.

[–]QuentinLeiataua0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That’s some beta shit saying you’re going to fail

[–]send_it_for_the_boys0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This has something that’s been helpin me lately, when you get anxious or nervous. Take a second and tell yourself no I’m not anxious I’m excited, I’m glad to be here IM FUCKIN PUMPED! Now you don’t have to be super loud and annoying and rubbing shit in people’s faces but you can carry yourself well, sit straight and smirk and just anything negative you think of kill that shit and flip the script to something positive, if you’re thinking a girl is thinking badly of you or thinking your boring or something STOP it. By telling yourself the opposite..like who tf cares what I say of coouurrsse she likes me of course she thinks I’m attractive why the fuck wouldn’t she? Why wouldn’t they want to be my friend? And if they don’t we’ll guess what who fucking cares. You don’t, and you know why? Because you have the full capability and potential to be a confident strong man with options like everybody else. Good luck

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

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[–][deleted][S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Oh how cool! I heard McCallen is filled with sexy ass woman. I’m in Laredo. Cousin lived there for a few months and told the women are sluttier there than here.

[–]dlee250930 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If just like to say in regards to your previous post- why are you eating out 4s and 5s? That’s in addition to the obvious heath concerns.

[–]Zombiespire0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I lol'd super hard at "80% of the post turned into a debate on eating pussy."

https://youtu.be/VuIbyvaMMPE

[–]2INNASKILLZ2K180 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think what you're failing to see and integrate is that a large part of whether you're successful or not is out of your control.

That's the part you're not cool with. You're outcome dependent. You're focusing on what 'hasn't gone well', the number of lays you didn't get, the girls that ghosted, and not on what DID go right.

You had 10 lays this year? Congrats, at that rate, by the time you're 31/32 you'd have 100 lays. That's excellent.

You've got some distorted thinking about where you should be at, and beating yourself up with story.

Relax, you're doing fine. Everything is a chance to learn and grow. Enjoy it.

[–]DAOcomment20 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just get the reference experience. Repeat for years. What you're doing is like a year one bodybuilder stressing out how he's going to perform tonight's set. What? Just do the set and pat yourself on the back for getting it in today. You'll grow a tiny bit as you process whatever happened. Repeat more sets consistently for years. Don't expect to see big gains on any scale other than months and years of consistent effort. If you're on a 10 year path to mastery, this girl and this next date aren't a big deal. If it works, great. If it bombs, great. You did it so you grew a little.

[–]jahmental0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Aint no such thing as no damn SMV

[–]NightTerror60 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

  1. Relax
  2. Relax
  3. Relax
  4. Relax... it’s easier to be creative that way.
  5. Lift and get your shit together
  6. Finally... RELAX!

You’ve got this. If you screw up on one date, it’s alright. Not the end of the world. There are thousands of women you will come in contact with, and by the fact that you have had enough dates to establish a pattern, I know you’re doing something right.

[–]KidGrizz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Fake it til you make it. You should feel proud! You are here born a man! You are not locked up. You obviously have something going on for yourself for the girl to even consider you! You not disabled. You not poor. You not locked up! Be proud of these things and act like it. You can be the king of your own world! Act like it!

[–]northernCAgrown0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I left you the comment about not eating tinder hoes on the first date.

I stand by my previous statement and can confirm I am not a "mgtow virgin".

[–]Endorsed ContributorWe_Are_Legion0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ignore these idiots.

You are where you are. Proceed with your experiment.

Go ahead and try this "exercises" thing. No, there is no ultimate nirvana in it, but doing it and observing the results is far more of a serious and sincere path than asking others. By letting these people sidetrack you, you will look to them for wisdom, rather than closely observing the causes and effects of your own life. At the end of the day, they don't have the investment and data that you have. And they will not stay with it for as long as your mind needs to be stayed with to become better.

Remember: No one can help you.

The only one who can stop things you do to yourself (fear, self-image) is yourself. Attempts to get others to solve your problems is running away from them. The only way to stop doing these things to yourself is to see clearly why you do them.

As for your post; there is so much nonsense in it I don't know where to begin. I will offer no more than guesses and observations, the kind such that you should've done yourself. And deeper. In fact, honestly, if you go no deeper into the CAUSES of these things than reading my post, you will find nothing changed. Whereas if you do observe deep inside of yourself, and figure out the bedrock causality why you subconsciously and consciously do these things to yourself; than upon gaining Understanding, you will cease doing them. And they will be gone. Forever.

Without "effort".

Possible causes that one might see from your observations (surface level):

  • Your sex life is different from your normal life because you think **less** during sex. In normal life, you think a lot. You trip over yourself second guessing your natural instincts. You do this "thinking" because you have a massive portion of your personality that you automatically suppress and alter in order to appease society. Carl Jung described these phenomenon very well as "Shadow Self". It leads to nothing good because nothing real in your mind can be suppressed for long. Your needs and desires WILL resurface somehow.
  • You say "yeah" "oh yeah" because you're not listening. You're "trying to seem to listen". You have nothing to say in response because everything you want to say has already been shot down by your mind.
  • You draw your identity from what quality of girl you sleep with.

Observations that you should make (one level below surface):

  • You see dates as failure or success. There is something you want from them. What is it? You might say "sex". Then ask "why?" I guarantee there is a whole yarnball there far far more complicated than "pleasure".

And I think you can find it. You are more sincere than the average man who doesn't observe. I recommend you to listen to this guy: https://www.33voices.com/authors/kapil-gupta If there is a living Buddha, it is him. I recommend starting with "The greatest barrier to self-improvement".

[–]Warren_Bateman-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

My foolproof trick to overcoming nerves:

When you feel nervous, imagine her underneath you moaning in pleasure. If you can’t, you need to have more sex.



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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