I’ve been studying RP material diligently for over a year now. To save you the victim puke and give you the TLDR version, it was one of those Job type scenarios. Only I was not near the righteous example he was. It includes a promiscuous ex-wife that left me for an older man, a second wife I was driving to hate me, lost custody of kids, and a bout with cancer.

Now that I’m out of the belly of the whale, getting ripped and like the cancer-free man I see mirror every morning, I have had some interesting developments in the last two to three weeks. I realized after several incidents at work and at home how defensive and sensitive I was in general. At some point it hit me, I was desperately seeking validation from others. When I say desperately I mean like a junkie after a fix. I decided to try an experiment. For the last two weeks, before I say or do anything to or for anyone I ask myself, “am I seeking validation or is this an authentic expression or statement?”. I also have stopped defending myself when my wife makes a critical comment, which is at least several times a day.

The results have been astounding. My wife has made reference to me being “nicer” at least a dozen times this week. She has $hi* tested me more than ever and I seem to be passing almost every one. We’ve had sex more this week than the last 6 months combined. She’s jealous, which is crazy because I actually think she was praying for me to cheat on her. I’m just kind of in awe at the results this simple change has made.

On another note, now a lot of the RP material seems to make more sense than it did before. I think being responsible for my own validation has solved the frame puzzle for me. I have figured out how to take the frame back in my home. Even my kids act differently now. I’m interested to know if anyone else has had the same or similar experience. Thanks and God bless!