I've noticed this more and more recently where girls love to bring up either positive traits about their ex, previous sexual partners or just in general humble bragging about their SMV, as if they try to DHV, qualify themselves or shit test a reaction out of you (bragging can fulfill either or all of those purposes I assume). Happens during initial flirting, dates, pillow talk -- it's something I've definitely picked up on a lot more as I've become more conscious of trying not to brag to girls myself (should I be?).
They'll often start with "one time this guy..", "this one time with my ex..", "my ex was really good at.." "this guy I hooked up with last week.." or more situationally, "that waiter is cute", "this creep asked for my number the other day", "a guy bought me a drink", "I'm getting so many looks in this club", "some weird guy just messaged me", "haha, the bouncer just asked for my number". It's very reminiscent of how guys brag to each other about their sexual conquests, but much less direct.
Am I missing something here? I like to think I'm successful with girls and a handsome fellow (not to brag, ironically), but I make a conscious effort not to bring up anything to suggest how "easily I get laid", my body count, past relationships, girls I've been with etc. I find it lame and insecure to do so, like its such a forced way to demonstrate value and pre-selection.. but is it actually the most effective from a female perspective?
So it's actually quite off-putting when I hear such bragging, qualifying, whatever -- a girl shamelessly telling me that I'm the third hookup she's had in a fortnight drops her value to the bottom of the ocean for me (and then they wonder where they went wrong). For context, I'm a 24 year old, recently bored of casual sex and looking for a LTR, so maybe such behavior just bothers me more now (I also notice it more from younger, less mature girls, student types).
- So why the hell do they do it? to spark jealousy?
- How do I respond?
- And should guys do the same to girls? am I not displaying SMV or high value as much as I could by not similarly bragging myself?
They're pretty much pointless comments that can be perceived as red flags and cause loss of attraction, I see no benefit -- are girls just that clueless with how to demonstrate value verbally (like they even need to..)? Giving the benefit of the doubt here.