After finishing and beginning to implement the sidebar required reading and getting only 2 weeks of momentum in the Male Action Plan, my wife dropped the bomb on me tonight that she wants to have sex outside of marriage, because she no longer feels safe with me, because she believes I raped her way back when.
Our sex life is currently at zero, and has been for a bit. I can't pinpoint what she's talking about, I don't recall any time we had sex where she told me to stop.
She has a history of trauma and has been raped by other men in the past, and she sees a therapist one on one, twice a week, to deal with it. (I know, I know. Lets focus on the exit plan).
I've got a career I'm excited about and I'm terrified about losing it all. She's terrified about being left on the streets if a divorce turns ugly.
She has not made a single threat about filing charges or anything. But I still feel like I'm almost being blackmailed... I'm thinking about telling her she's clear to fuck whoever she wants, essentially ending the marriage.
I'm lifting, cooking, and cleaning, doing all my adult shit I need to be doing. And of course I made ten thousand mistakes leading up to this point.
I'm thinking about seeking help myself, this feels like too much to process. But I'm scared any therapist would throw me in jail too. Am I just freaking out here?
What is an actual plan I can follow for a clean exit?