Need an exit plan [24 y/o, married 1.5 yrs]

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January 17, 2020

After finishing and beginning to implement the sidebar required reading and getting only 2 weeks of momentum in the Male Action Plan, my wife dropped the bomb on me tonight that she wants to have sex outside of marriage, because she no longer feels safe with me, because she believes I raped her way back when.

Our sex life is currently at zero, and has been for a bit. I can't pinpoint what she's talking about, I don't recall any time we had sex where she told me to stop.

She has a history of trauma and has been raped by other men in the past, and she sees a therapist one on one, twice a week, to deal with it. (I know, I know. Lets focus on the exit plan).

I've got a career I'm excited about and I'm terrified about losing it all. She's terrified about being left on the streets if a divorce turns ugly.

She has not made a single threat about filing charges or anything. But I still feel like I'm almost being blackmailed... I'm thinking about telling her she's clear to fuck whoever she wants, essentially ending the marriage.

I'm lifting, cooking, and cleaning, doing all my adult shit I need to be doing. And of course I made ten thousand mistakes leading up to this point.

I'm thinking about seeking help myself, this feels like too much to process. But I'm scared any therapist would throw me in jail too. Am I just freaking out here?

What is an actual plan I can follow for a clean exit?

Post Information
Title Need an exit plan [24 y/o, married 1.5 yrs]
Author mtrpthrowaway2124
Upvotes 7
Comments 35
Date 17 January 2020 04:39 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Original Link
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Red Pill terms found in post:

[–]PersaeusRed Beret52 points53 points  (3 children) | Copy

every unhappy wife is a rape victim

OP, honestly, the fact that this is even a question shows how far mankind has sunk.

get your lawyer lined up, move out, and nuke (divorce) from orbit.

you likely don't need therapy. you need to get out and get a better life.

history of trauma and has been raped by other men in the past

this is an automatic NEXT red flag. damaged goods

[–]Over60_FireTempered3Red Beret7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

history of trauma and has been raped by other men in the past

Whenever I met a woman with a story that resembled this in any way, my weiner would immediatlely shrink.

[–]PersaeusRed Beret9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

wise, your dick was

[–]hoopingblob0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret47 points48 points  (7 children) | Copy

Just another reminder here folks that a woman's hamster is powerful shit. She has decided she wants to fuck other men "because she believes I raped her way back when."

OP she is already fucking someone or is going to branch swing.

Welcome to hypergamy.

[–]Over60_FireTempered3Red Beret5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

She has decided she wants to fuck other men "because she believes I raped her way back when."

That is some amazing crazy right there.

[–]HornsOfApathyMod / Red Beret2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Makes you wonder:

has been raped by other men in the past, and she sees a therapist one on one, twice a week, to deal with it.

Plural? How much of that is hamster too?

[–]Over60_FireTempered3Red Beret0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yes, u/bogeyd6 has it right again.

[–]bogeyd6Mod / Red Militia0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Pop taught me that one thing and 20$ is 20$ ;)

[–]Over60_FireTempered3Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Your pop was a smart man. The apple didn't fall far from the tree...didn't rot either. Life is good for you.

[–]KoolAidMan79801 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Is it best for OP to encourage this hypergamy and hope she successfully branch swings and then attempt to divorce under more favorable conditions?

[–]PersaeusRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

no, any accusation of rape or unfounded assault should result in immediate hard NEXT from a safe distance, unless your kids are involved . . . then it get's complicated.

Joe Law ain't on your team

[–]stoicstephen29 points30 points  (0 children) | Copy

Damn. OP there's no room for second guessing this.

You don't have kids, in fact you are still a kid (24yo), so just end it.

Don't let oneitis fuck with your mind.

Just end it.

[–]tom-anonymous10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

"my wife dropped the bomb on me tonight that she wants to have sex outside of marriage, because she no longer feels safe with me, because she believes I raped her way back when."

This doesn't add up. She's basically saying "you traumatized me once when we were having sex, now it's making me want to have sex with someone else"?

If she's not already banging someone, then she's got someone lined up and she's pulling shit out of her ass as an excuse to have sex with him without being labeled a cheater.

You're young. No kids? Get out now...


Personally I get the impression there is more to this story that you are telling us. I think there's a reason she has you afraid of what might come out if you file for divorce...

In any case, listen to everyone else here regarding the lawyer. If I were you I'd just tell her that this marriage is too young for us to be having these problems, and that you can't imagine what things will be like in 20 years if she's already asking to have sex with other men.

I'm past the 20 year mark with a very insecure wife with childhood issues. Trust me, I can tell you with 100% certainty your marriage will not work out. It's not going to be an easy life for you. When she gets into her 40's she's going to be even more of a mess. And the only thing you'll have to show for it is some fucked up children who might not even be yours...

[–]bogeyd6Mod / Red Militia7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

This, gentlemen, is exactly why you dont stick your dick in crazy.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando15 points16 points  (2 children) | Copy

She told you to stop fucking her when you became unnatractive. She didn't say it outright, but she told you by her actions when she stopped fucking you.

She still finds you unnatractive and is now actively seeking a branch swing. The fact that she verbalized this in womaneze most likely means that she has someone lined up that she's already fucking.

She won't kill the puppy because that would make her the bad guy, so she's trying to get you to do it.

So, the question remains.. do you want to kill the puppy or are you ok with being cucked by your wife?

[–]WesternhagenWinner5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

"Stop hamstering that your wife is crazy, the problem is you" is true 99% of the time. But this post sounds like it could be in the 1% where she is genuinely crazy. If she has been "traumatized and raped by other men" (plural!) then she is psychologically damaged. In such cases, his MAP is irrelevant to regaining attraction from her. You can't MAP your way out of it when she is batshit crazy. She won't even notice the changes in him (because: batshit crazy).

Ultimately, whether or not she is crazy does not matter. His path forward is to divorce the crazy bitch and continue to improve himself.

[–]ArborioRice5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Forget the "you raped me" thing for a second.

"I want an open marriage" or any iteration thereof is 99% of the time her already fucking someone else and looking for permission after the fact. Too late, already done.

I'm thinking about telling her she's clear to fuck whoever she wants, essentially ending the marriage.

There is no "essentially", there is ending it for good or being a cuck.

Lawyer, papers, etc. You're too young for this shit.

[–]sd4c7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

A woman even verbalizing that she's considering letting other guys fuck her, is like a man verbalizing that he thinks about fucking little kids. If you think things are bad now, wait until she finds a guy she enjoys getting railed by. At that point, the revisionist history that's already begun will turn you into something between Pol Pot and Pontius Pilate.

Get the fuck out, NOW. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Close every joint account you can, put a temporary lock on your credit and BOUNCE to the nearest female, Asian, divorce attorney you can afford.

And remember the SAS Credo: "He who files first, wins."

[–]Edom_Kolona1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

female, Asian, divorce attorney

I understand why a female can be preferable as a divorce attorney. Why Asian?

And remember the SAS Credo: "He who files first, wins."

True. Can confirm.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

This reeks of trolling, but I’ll entertain anyway....

You obviously haven’t read the sidebar. What are your lifts?

She doesn’t want to fuck a pussy with no frame. That’s what she’s really telling you.

[–]psychoduckly2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Get a lawyer, say "I need my attorney before I speak" to any questions a cop asks you. Wife cannot change. She is a nut. If she really felt as though you'd raped her, she wouldn't want to fuck around.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Next Do pass go. Do not collect 200

GTFO before, you are sitting in jail. She is a lost cause

[–]Rifleshoot1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Hamster running amok. If she was abused in the past, sorry to say, she’s damaged goods anyways. Read Practical Female Psychology. Your wife sounds like low self esteem, high sex drive. She seeks out abuse because she gets off on it. She probably even convinced herself that you raped her as part of some fantasy that she is now convinced was real. These type women waffle between abusers, then nice guys, then go back to abusers. Her ex was probably an abuser and you were a nice guy. She told you about wanting to sleep with other guys in the hopes you would get angry and abusive, because she seeks it. Best advice now is to get out now. There’s no saving this hoe.

[–]Alpha_FucksFormerly DaddyChadThundercock1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Abused women need to make their significant other "the bad man" so they can be attracted. It's fucked up shit but its true. Even as a young man I knew to look for girls with daddy issues if I wanted to fuck them easily. It was like a smell or something men can pick up on.

It isn't their fault and you shouldn't be angry but you should avoid them like the plague.

Every man should read PFS.

[–]themerovingian011 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

NEXT! Even the fact that she needs to see a therapist twice a week is a huge red flag on its own.

[–]WolfofAllStreetz1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Run, fast. This will not end well for you.

My wife has a coworker that was raped at 21, girl is a lunatic. Type A personality too which is odd in a woman.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why would you marry a woman that claims to have been raped “several” times. Major red flag. Now you’re the rapist too?!

Get out now.

[–]NeoTheJuanDJ0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

She’s fucking strange and/or already has a branch swing lined up. She is introducing this to you. The rape thing never happened. She is looking to blame shift and offload her responsibility in the marriage to remain monogamous by blaming you for her insufferable unhappiness.

You are/were beta. She is unhappy. “Every unhappy wife is a rape victim”. - In this case, that is literally the excuse she is using to hamster her way into fucking strange, and to justify this decision so she doesn’t feel like a bad person. A wild blend of solipsism, Hypergamy, and the female hamster at work. If she’s mentioning fucking other men to you, it’s likely it has already happened. Especially with no sex for a while.

Notice how she never mentioned divorce with you? Notice she mentioned she’d like to fuck strange and just kind of left it at that? As if testing to see if you (the guy who is ironically getting a job promotion soon) would do anything about it.

If you stay, she has her beta bux who she never has to fuck, and you get cucked. If you leave, you killed the puppy so she didn’t have to. Lawyer up. You have no kids. You have little shared assets/equity.

Run, and leave this hoe to fend for her Bally’s Fitness receptionist job and to approach the wall. It’s over. Run and never return.

[–]Perfectinmyeyes0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nice response. Makes sense.

[–]jacksarmy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Your exit plan should just be to walk out the door and don't come back, send her the divorce from your new life

[–]Edom_Kolona0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If she wants sex outside of marriage, you can't stop her. But outside and inside are mutually exclusive and if she decides to go outside, there shall be no inside to return to.
If she wasn't living on the streets before you, why would she be there after? It should only turn ugly if she wants it to turn ugly. (And she might, regardless of what she claims now.) Sounds like manufactured drama.

Now please explain why getting a divorce would mess up your career. Unless there's something you have failed to mention, yes, you're just freaking out. Read up on divorce. It sucks, but it isn't the end of the world, especially with no kids.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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