While men and women are very different, one thing we have in common is that the majority of us are terrible. 90% of women are basic bitches whose lives revolve around Netflix, wine, shopping, and naps. But we often forget that 90% of men are fuckboys who have no vision beyond videogames, televised sports, smoking weed, and trying to keep their dicks slick. We fault women as boring and banal but too often neglect ourselves.
The kneejerk response is that we’re all unplugged individuals. We’re miles ahead of Joe Beta eating cheetohs on the couch. But the unfortunate truth is that TRP consists mainly of Reformed Betas, and chances are most of us spent high school and college locked in our rooms studying or playing video games; which in terms of cultivating individual character and force of personality is pretty fucking terrible. Without real life experience, too often these guys express themselves through pop-culture references and define themselves by the media they consume. They lack an original, self-actualized identity.
Almost every day I see newly unplugged guys wondering how they can become more interesting and make conversation. Most of TRP is pretty straightforward: lift, read, approach. There’s an endless amount of information on how to lift weights, along with a wealth of resources in the sidebar on RP theory and game. But what do you do if you have the chiseled body and iron frame, but nothing inside? Many guys here already have rich and fulfilling lives. This post is not for you. This is for all the newbies who hit /r/asktrp wondering how to make friends.
Hobbies, interests, and experiences
These three things make up the foundation of who we are. Women might be judged solely on how they look, but men are judged on WHAT THEY DO. What do you do? What do you like to do? What have you already done? What do you plan on doing? Either directly or indirectly, people will ask you these questions and you must have satisfactory answers. If the answer to all these questions is Xbox and jerking off then you’re doing it wrong.
HOBBIES
These are activities you do regularly with TANGIBLE results. “Playing videogames” is not a hobby. Neither is watching sports, drinking beers, or hanging out with your bros. There is nothing inherently wrong with these activities, but in the end you haven’t achieved anything substantial. We fault party girls for endlessly pursuing good times without contributing or developing anything. While lounging on the porch lacks the glamour and excitement of recreational drugs and club music, it’s ultimately just as frivolous. Hobbies are more analogous to skills, rooted in pragmatism with tangible benefits. Women don't worry about this because they are all born with a vital skill: SEX
It is imperative that you cultivate several hobbies and work on them regularly. That is, at least once a week -- preferably more often -- you dedicate time towards the pursuit of each hobby. How many people do you know that “play guitar” but haven’t touched one in months if not years? If they even still own one.
To develop a well-rounded personality, you must pursue at least one hobby from each of the three cardinal spheres: The Physical, The Creative, and The Mental.
THE PHYSICAL: These are activities that strengthen your body and increase your stamina. At least three times a week you should be engaging in a physical activity. The very minimum requirement is weightlifting, the quintessential “lift more” of TRP. But often that’s not enough. Every lame half-alpha out in the wild fucks around at the gym, and for top-tier guys a weightlifting regimen is all but mandatory. A true physical hobby goes beyond mere maintenance of your physique. These are activities like snowboarding, rock climbing, boxing, and cycling. Even conventional sports like basketball -- if you take it seriously. Pushing your body to its limits and developing your natural agility, power, and grace. We might not be chasing down mammoths any more but you can still be a hunter and warrior.
If it is your sole source of exercise then three times a week is mandatory. If it supplements weightlifting or calisthenics, then once a week is acceptable. It’s not just about strengthening your body, but adding another layer to your personality. “I’m hitting the slopes over break. I just ran a marathon last weekend. Let’s ball after work.” You will have a hardness and appeal to you that most people lack.
THE CREATIVE: These are activities that result in tangible pieces of aesthetic work. Drawing, painting, music, sculpture, singing, and so on. Most people believe that artistic ability is innate, but really it’s a matter of practice and commitment. Just like lifting and game, there are myriad resources available for you to improve in the media of your choice. As with The Physical, creative hobbies need to be practiced at least three times a week.
That isn’t to say that multiple times a week you need to painstakingly hew Greco-Roman deities from living marble. Just as there are light and heavy workouts, there are smaller and larger sessions. For example, I’m a painter. I dedicate a single day during the week in which I go to the studio, turn my phone off, and spend a few hours painting. The rest of the week I just work in my sketchbook: drawing, sketching, and generally brainstorming. Likewise, maybe you only go to a voice coach once a week, but the rest of the time you practice your scales at home. Not every session is monumental, but you consistently make progress. If you can commit to those three weekly sessions, you’ll be surprised at how quickly you improve and how proficient you become. If you spend money on private lessons or take a class at the local college you’ll progress even faster, with the bonus of meeting young liberal females ;)
You don’t need to be a Renaissance artist to satisfy this hobby. Creative writing and poetry are equally excellent. Woodworking is rustic and timeless. Photography and graphic design are also viable options that are more modern and accessible, although significant effort is required to elevate yourself above the many amateurs.
THE MENTAL: Another word for this sphere would be The Technical or The Intellectual. The Physical will strengthen your body and The Creative will refine your aesthetic, but you need to challenge your mind in order to complete the trinity. There are overlaps between Mental hobbies and Interests (which I will mention shortly), but remember that the defining aspect of a hobby is that it provides tangible benefit. While reading about history and playing chess are certainly intellectual pursuits, ultimately you don’t achieve much besides knowing more about history and getting better at chess.
Mental hobbies are things such as coding, mechanics, and foreign languages. They can be financial pursuits such as real estate or managing a business. On a more Machiavellian level, it can even include human psychology and manipulation. They all require intelligence, study, and practice, but are useful and applicable. You can build your own website or design a new app. Save hundreds of dollars maintaining your own vehicle. TRP often recommends travel; consider how much more autonomous you will be and how much richer your experience when you have multiple means of communication at your disposal. Out of the three spheres, Mental hobbies most directly translate into utility and profit.
These categories are not set in stone. There is plenty of overlap between the spheres. Dance blends the physical and the creative. Cooking and baking blend the creative and mental. Martial arts combine the mental and physical. Even something as mundane as gardening contains elements from all three areas. The key is to become a well-rounded individual who can contribute in multiple ways.
INTERESTS
Interests and hobbies are often confused. While there are similarities, the main difference is that interests are pursued on their own merit. You engage in them solely because of their appeal to you. Hobbies are constrained through their practical application, but interests are far more open ended. However, most interests have zero practicality; you need a different mindset when you pursue interests versus hobbies.
The "point" of having diverse interests is allowing you to contribute to conversations. That’s it. Yes you can pull the sitcom routine and try to memorize various trivia on a subject so you can fake expertise, but your conversations will be far more natural, organic, and fulfilling if you have real knowledge of whatever topic you are discussing. To be an interesting person you need to discuss interesting things; to discuss interesting things you need to have knowledge on interesting things.
What do you do for fun? What interests or excites you? Answering these questions is crucial to determining what you want to pursue. Nature and the outdoors. Punk rock. Floral arrangement. Archaeology. Tarot readings. Classic literature. Tropical fish. Horror movies. Modern art. Taxidermy. Deep house. American history. Board games. Tantric philosophy. Magic tricks. Rock collecting. German expressionism. Astronomy. Hog futures. Interior design. Your options are endless. This is such a simple and basic concept but many people lack the basic desire to broaden their horizons. Ask your plates about any of these topics and watch their eyes glaze over.
Take initiative and pursue your interests actively. You can’t passively sit through life waiting for opportunities to explore. Just like anything else on TRP, read, learn, and spend time on them. If you don’t know where to begin, don’t forget that any of the hobbies mentioned in the previous section are automatic interests. They naturally lend themselves to other areas of knowledge. If you’re a cyclist, then you already know about cycling. You can discuss different bikes, routes, and maintenance, but it’s so easy to expand from cycling into environmental impact, public transit, kinesiology, health benefits, city planning, triathlons, and mechanics.
However, not all interests are created equal. Videogames get a lot of shit on TRP, but videogames are a legitimate interest. You can spend time and money on them, you can discuss them, and they bring enjoyment to your life. But when men on TRP talk shit about videogames, it comes from a place of truth. For practical purposes, NO women want to hear you talk about videogames. None of them. Ever. What you do on your own time is your business. If they help you unwind, God bless. But understand that certain things have a negative connotation that you may want to distance yourself from. If your primary goal is sexual strategy, it is imperative you keep that in mind. Regardless of how lame or sexy your interests are, they should all contribute to your overall frame of reference. Think of “water cooler talk”. Even if videogames aren’t hot, you can still connect with people who play them.
The key here is to not separate and categorize hobbies and interests, but to pursue them in concert and combine them in interesting ways. For example, if your physical hobby is rock climbing and one of your interests is nature and the outdoors, then every month you go camping with all your gear and climb during the day while sleeping under the stars at night. Doing that is much more interesting than simply going to an indoor climbing gym and walking through the woods behind your house. You create something greater than the sum of its individual parts. These kinds of combinations lead into the third aspect of personality.
EXPERIENCES
It's very easy to fall into a routine of work-gym-eat-sleep-repeat. You sustain yourself – even stay healthy - but are you really living? Even if you pursue all the hobbies and interests mentioned earlier, you could still spend your entire life in a 10-mile bubble. You need to go out and experience LIFE. 9 times out of 10, if a newbie isn’t making any progress it’s because he’s spending too much time reading and not enough time doing.
Climb a mountain. Tag a watertower. Trip on acid in the desert under a full moon. Party in Ibiza. Get in a fight. Sneak backstage at a concert. Go skydiving. Date a sugar mama. Volunteer at the shelter. Backpack across Asia. Wrestle a large animal. Go to Gay Pride. Learn to backflip. Spend a night on the streets. Take two dates to the same party. Run with the bulls. Hike the Pacific Crest Trail. Go streaking.
Note that some of these activities are HORRENDOUSLY stupid. But that’s the great thing about experiences, they are EXPERIENCE. And even the bad ones make you a stronger, more interesting person. Internalize the good. Learn from the bad. This is part of the reason why girls love bikers, criminals, gangsters, and dealers. They’re doing stuff. They’re exciting. They’re dangerous. I can hear the girls getting wet from here. Even if in the grand scheme of things these guys are in a shitty position, girls would rather have fun in the dirt than stay clean and bored on the couch. Girls would rather share an Alpha than own a Beta.
Again, this is all obvious shit. But if you never venture out of your comfort zone, you will never grow and develop as a human being. However, it’s not about running around like a headless chicken trying to do as much wacky shit as possible. Yes, in the grand scheme you can travel all around the world collecting notches and accolades, but in the mundane, day-to-day aspect you also need to maintain an active social life. One of the more common questions I see from new subscribers is how to meet girls once they graduate college. These guys have trouble because they don’t make an effort. You can be The Most Interesting Man in the World, but you still need to put yourself out there.
Many men enter "accidental monk mode". I've been guilty of it myself. You read the literature, you hit the gym, get your career on track, and focus on your hobbies. But since a social life isn't spoon fed to you like it was in high school or college you never go out unless someone drags you. Sometimes it's because your social network is in shambles, sometimes it's because porn and videogames are convenient and available. Before you know it a month goes by and you're in a dry spell.
If you want a social life you have to WORK for it. Guys complain about never meeting girls, but if they were going to house parties, concerts, doing co-ed athletics, hitting the bars, perfecting their online game, and just generally expanding their social circle, you'd hear a lot less complaining. But that's hard. It's a lot easier to make excuses. One of the core tenets of TRP is that you as a man are not entitled to anything. That includes having a good time.
The next post will discuss developing a sense of humor, becoming more charismatic, and being mindful of the company you keep.
EDIT: DRUGS ARE BAD KIDS
yes! another way to put it would be: be active! I think man is made to be active and create something, wheter it is repairing a shelf or writing a litterature masterpiece. We were created to run and hunt animals, making shelter, farm and advancing civilazation, not to eat doritos in front of the TV. That's why men always had a lot of various interests. Just check out men's magazines or tv shows: sports, fishing, history, science, astronomy etc. That's why Wikipedia and reddit are filled mostly with men, since women are more passive.
The next interesting step is when you take your favorite interest and put it in a serious hobby, you then create a life style, it changes your reality, it adds depth to your life. I'm a painter too, i'm serious about this. So it's just not about me doing a canvas in my home from time to time, but having all of my friends working in creative fields. It's me walking down the street and bumping to a collegue and talking about a new project. Going to exhibitions, meeting new people (and chicks), expanding my social circle, creating cool projects, having goals and a vision. When i travel, you bet that i hook up with local artists that will show me the cool underground spots.
The average women i meet are drawn to this reality, that is different from theirs. It beats watching netflix.
Now no need to be artist to do all this. My uncle decided to be serious about cycling, in his 60's. Worked out 3 times a week, met plenty of cycling buddies, basically he created a brand new social circle from scratch and became super fit, while his wife was still doing nothing and fat. One year later he was planning a circuit for a cycling trip with his buddies in the french Pyrenees.
No. Anyone reading this? FUCK NO.
Why would you throw this in there, with all this other well crafted advice?
That's like throwing in 'play legitimate Russian roulette' . Are you nuts?
IIRC, something like 23% of first time Heroin users will become addicted, and eventually close to half of those addicts will die from it.
So for every 10 people that try heroin, at least one will die directly from it, and that is a incredibly conservative estimate.
I'm not anti-drug, and fuck the current law system in western countries concerning drugs, but you are off your tits if you think we ought to go out and try heroin.
The rest of your post is awesome, edit this bullshit out.
EDIT: Glad to see OP thought the better of that suggestion. Bravo.
I dropped acid a few days ago, and I would never ever ever consider doing heroin.
LSD is a magical substance.
Highly recommend hallucinogens. Your life, and other lives you encounter will most likely be better because of the experience. I like to trip every six months just to keep things on an even keel.
Not a party drug, unless with experience trippers. Read up on any drug before consumption. Can be 5 years worth of psychotherapy in a couple hours, or an intense introspective hellscape depending on your mindset and how willing your are to let your ego fade away.
My experiences (20+) have been more beneficial to my overall well-being than anything else I can think of. Shrooms are my favorite BTW, take 3g's and have some fun, take a half O and meet god..
Yeah shrooms or acid, these are spiritual experiences for me. They can lead to a really good time or a really bad time, because they amplify and bring to the surface the feelings and thoughts you have deep down which you normally are not consciously aware of.
Know this. Know that you will have to face whatever is bubbling down in your subconscious, it will be brought up into the light. Most likely, some of this will be some dark shit, even if your life is pretty good.
For me, I've always done it out in nature. I would go out into the woods by myself for 8-10 hours where I will not likely encounter other people. I haven't had much desire to do it around other people because their presence introduces a variable to the equation that is a wild card and potentially a very strong one. And anyhow the experience for me is about myself and existence, me and the universe, me and my life, not about other people.
My second or third time I actually had a closed eye vision of some kind of beings tearing my skin and muscles from my body, cracking open my ribs and draining a dark fluid from my body and replacing it with a bright glowing light, then reassembling my entire body. It felt like I had had all of the depression and anxiety I felt towards life in general removed from me. I was a miserable, miserable person before shrooms, where now I can say with ease that I'm happy. They weren't a miracle drug that cured my depression, but they certainly showed me that I needed to work on all of these things deep down inside of myself that my ego was hiding from me.
What do you do while on shrooms or acid?
Just lie in bed and introspect or can I be on reddit?
Like I said, I go out into nature, go to a state park somewhere. A pleasant setting away from people. Just soak it in and think. There will be plenty going on in your mind to keep you occupied.
Reddit, seriously? No computers no... your hand eye coordination will be fucked and you won't be able to see clearly enough to read well. The whole point of it is for a deep experience that gets you in touch with the basic realities of existence. It's not for the faint of heart and it can bring up some dark shit like I said, but also put you in touch with some deeper beauty as well.
Shrooms inspired me to kick my depression, eat healthy, forgive my father and start exercising as well as a whole heap of tangible benefits.
literally the reverse for me. it threw me into a stint of depression and anxiety for a year and a half.
Jesus this sounds like quite the coin flip
There is a chance you didn't understand what the trip was all about. Sometimes a "bad" trip is basically having to confront everything that has been bothering you. Some people can't handle the possible truth about themselves or their life & instead of confronting and changing it,they view it as the psychedelics that put them in their depression.
/u/stinkfished was depressed to begin with, you on the other hand tried fixing something that wasn't broke, which could explain your experience.
Goddamn everyone on here says theyre great for life and finally the truth.
They inspired me to quit my mundane job of 4 years I hated, join a BJJ gym (which has become an absolute passion, love, and obsession) and subsequently lost over 50 pounds. Life has never been better for me.
Hmm Interesting. I've been looking into psychedelics and shrooms always seems to be a top choice for a first-timer.
They're really easy to get a hold of if you live in Europe, Americans need to either grow them themselves, find a dealer or wait until they grow naturally at the end of summer.
Do plenty of research before you dive in, erowid.com is the best place for that.
please bold this disclaimer because it can fuck you up mentally if you aren't in a good place when you take them.
hallucinogens aren't some party drug you take just to see pretty colors and can do it at any time. it fucked me up hard for a year and a half. almost dropped out of college because of the last effect it had on my mind.
Can you go into more detail? As someone considering a first trip I'm curious as to what your experience was like.
sure.
The setup: lived in a house with 7 other guys, 5 of which have taken shrooms already and said it was amazing. one of the times they tripped i sat with them and bs'd around as they were tripping. they seemed to be enjoying it.
so i thought, yea, sure, i'll try them next time you do them.
but 3 of them didn't want to at the time because they said they weren't prepared mentally. they never warned me about the whole state of mind aspect of it so i didn't think much of it at the time.
so, it ended up being me and 2 other guys doing it. with our 3 other friends hanging out with us.
the first 10 minute i hadn't eaten for like 6 hours or something so i was really hungry. so i got some food, bad idea.
the shrooms didn't agree with my stomache (which is pretty common actually) and i felt like i had to puke for the next 30 minute. but i couldnt make myself puke. so on the come up i was sitting there hating this already, in my mind thinking "when will this be over". so i sat down alone in the bathroom to try to make myself throw up for what felt like an hour but was actually 5 minutes. lost in thought loops. started smelling things that i couldnt identify, didn't know what i was seeing and it was just very mentally exhausting trying to identify what the fuck was going on.
about 5 minute later someone calls my name. i hadn't thrown up but i was feeling a little better and i leave the bathroom.
so about an hour in it start to hit me hard. 3 of the people we were hanging out with wanted to go out to their friends house so it was left with just the 3 of us tripping. (2 have done it before and knew how to handle things). so they leave, and after the initial peek i'm having trouble keeping track of reality. my only draw back to knowing what was actually real was i knew it was raining outside. and that stuck with me.
so on a lower end about an hour and a half in i do what i usually do when i get way too fucked up. i try to just rest it off (i do this with alcohol and weed.) meanwhile one of the guys i was tripping with was off doing his own thing. so i end up in my room by myself.
Bad idea.
Don't let this happen.
i spent 2 hours by myself locked in thought loops that i couldnt escape. the world constantly swirling no thoughts of gravity or time or dimension or anything. i just existed and whatever was next in my train of thought became my reality.
i won't go into detail on my thoughts at this time because it's hard to put myself through that again but long story short i thought i was dying like truely dying. i thought i was never coming out of the trip and i had absolutely no idea what time it was. i was caught in loops where i would get out of bed, open the door, walk to my bathroom and the motion of opening the bathroom door was me getting out of bed again. it was an endless turmoil of mental battles with my own fears until my friend eventually came in and chkecked on me (the other one tripping). so i hung out with him for the fallout last hour of the trip and things were okay from there. we reflected on our experience and overall i was just glad it was over.
but then i tried going to sleep. and the feeling of falling asleep got my mind thinking i was falling back into the trip, and it was fucking TERRIFYING. i couldnt sleep for a week, keep in mind i'm in college at this time borderline failing out of college. so the stress from no sleep started to compound with the fear of failing. and then my mind just devolved into a spiral of fear that i had never experienced in my life.
this led to me getting REALLY bad anxiety for about 6 months, i had headaches every single day that were as strong as migraines. and i couldn't take any pain medication or any body altering substance because the feeling of losing control of my body the way the medicine would have affected me was a reminder of those vivid memories from the trip. and again, made things worse instead of helped.
So yea, that was my experience with shrooms. looking back now it changed me, possibly for the better, i've come out of these 4 years probably a better and strong person than i was back when i did them. but i do feel regretful that i didn't have people constantly around me to talk to during the trip. people giving you a different perspective will help immensely. because i keep getting caught in mind loops where i was just thinking about time and doing something but needing time and the thing i want to do will give me time. Wierd i know but i was stuck in that for what felt like hours. unable to think because the thought consume you.
overall I wouldnt be for or against someone doing shrooms, but i would caution heavily on enviroment. where you are at mentally and the people you have around you will vastly effect your trip.
I've read in multiple places that shrooms/LSD destroy your ego. Could you expand on that, what changes specifically and why?
The ego is a veil between your bullshit and reality. So when you are on shrooms/LSD that veil goes away and you are left with the truth. The truth about what is really important to you, the things you should not care about, and possibly that you are an asshole. It's kind of a paradox that when your third eye is pried open you get clarity, even though your sense of sight and connection to the physical realm is shattered.
They also can cause permanent mood disturbances if you do them enough. Depression, anxiety and other not fun consequences. I wouldn't make a habit out of doing them.
This is what happened to me. I used to be a generally charismatic person before a year long stint with psychedelics (street acid 18x and shrooms 3x). Now I'm totally disconnected from "consensus reality." AKA I can't easily relate to people.
I think about things that people don't typically think about. Big picture stuff. My favorite thoughts typically have very little conversational value. If I can turn these thoughts into something productive, I'll count my dain bramage as a blessing. Until then it's just a curse.
It's been a year since I quit psychedelics and I'm still incredibly uncomfortable around people. Maybe in five years I'll have a recovery story.
I have a friend who did "acid" 16x and he's doing quite well socially. Outperforming most people. If I could go back, I would only do acid 5x, with lots of time in between trips.
My opinion on psychedelics: Love/hate. If you're a thinker, the experience will be priceless. Only do them a few times at most.
I highly recommend anyone interested in hallucinogens listen to Terence McKenna. A small take on the ego from him.
Whenever I ask around for shrooms people are always like, why dont you do LSD?
Shrooms was the best feeling in the world and the next day wasnt a shitfest like LSD.
Not at that level, but a really intense high from weed made me change my major the next day to what I really wanted (from economics to computer science).
This is what dissuades me from trying them. However, weed makes me quite introspective and hallucinate like a motherfucker. I've had a couple of epiphanies due to weed.
I have yet to experience a "bad trip" if you ever decide to try hallucinogens, take 10-30 minutes to clear your mind beforehand or while coming up. Don't try to fight the crazy shit, let go, and come whatever may. Most importantly, have a blast, bond with your friends, and say hi to god.
Yeah, it's a shame it's so hard to find.
Ever been to a music festival? Not that hard.
I can't say I've been to one. I've always enjoyed acid and weed, but I have never liked the stoner/hippy scene at all. They annoy the shit out of me.
There are great electronic ones that catch more my interest but you're generalizing all the festies into a grateful dead shit fest with wookies running around. I'll say right now if you find one that has music you enjoy you'll never walk back the same. You'd be surprised of how many beautiful women attend these things.
LSA not LSD. LSD is acid. Aka LSA w/ diethylamide. LSA is naturally found in certain plants like morning glory seeds. But never eat the seeds of plants that you order because they are denatured and WILL make you sick. You have to raise the plants to germination and then those seeds are safe to eat. Keep in mind it will require a lot of seeds.
LSA could be a good alternative. Not quite the same, but it's legal in its natural form.
especially if you ever try to join most security, or martial parts of the public service. Few things will get you 'noped' faster
What do you mean? It's not as though I put it on my C.V.
Military, RCMP, and I'm sure others will ask you, either on a polygraph, or just questionaire...
Pot use, after a while is doable. cocaine too, but I think it's at least 2 years ago, shrooms and lsd is a nop, never, nada, could have been 20 years ago, no matter.
but how well they check depends on the agency, though it might be telling if you have to lie for one thing on your application, chances are there are bigger problems than your drug use
Well shit good thing I don't live in some tyrannical country like that.
Where the hell do you guys get these drugs? It's like they fall at your doorstep. Going off a tangent, but I'd rather try LSD.
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Honestly I think anyone who is firmly anti-hallucinogen just doesn't understand how they can be utilized. Also if someone had their life destroyed from acid must have been in pretty bad shape mentally already. If it wasn't the acid then it would have just been another thing.
Not exactly. I was in a circle of friends who used psychedelics pretty heavily in our teens. Our brains all got pretty fried from it despite the positive mindsets we started out with.
A clean roll or trip can put an end to your depression, but it can just as easily deepen depression or spark a depression that wasn't even there. One of the guys who took shrooms a lot ended up killing himself. Tripping definitely has its potential for bringing you closer to enlightenment, but the side effects are so downplayed and shouldn't be taken lightly. Better to do it conservatively if you must.
As Joe Rogan put it "I know people who have been ruined by cheeseburgers and scratch lottery tickets!" Losers are going to be losers and use whatever excuse they need to fuck off in life. Don't shit on psychedelics if you've never used them yourself or can at least show clinical studies where they are ruining lives...which if you look up studies you will see they actually improve lives.
http://healthland.time.com/2011/06/16/magic-mushrooms-can-improve-psychological-health-long-term/
Let's look at the reality of heroin vs. acid. People are very likely to become addicted to heroin, where people are not likely to get addicted to acid. People are very likely to eventually overdose on heroin, and the same cannot be said for acid.
I'm not saying for a second that acid is good for me, because it probably isn't. I'm just probably not going to die from acid.
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I'm not even trying to compare the merits, I was only trying to compare the risks.
I would argue that a good time to start using heroin would be when your doctor gives you 3 to 6 months to live after you've been diagnosed with cancer.
If you are going to try something I would recommend MDMA at least once in your life. Honestly was a life changing time for me that really expanded my frame of reference on life.
Care to explain it more in detail? Why was it life changing, what insights did you develop that made your life better?
MDMA + girls + music is probably the best combo this life has to offer.
First time use will forever make you more social able and appreciate people more. The experience gets imprinted in your memory.
Unfortunately you gotta be strict with your use. Four times a year is a good safe limit. Lots of people tend to make it a weekly thing which definitely causes problems down the line.
MDMA is over rated, and I don't think it will change anyone's social life except if you've never talked to humans before. Anyways, for those who are still mdma virgins, don't get your hopes too high up but it's worth a try.
Maybe do more than a point next time lol. Ive tripped on molly quite a few times...its pure love...your not lustful...but you love everyone and everything...one of the most beautiful moments of my life. Which is why I stopped, hard to appreciate reality when you get accustomed to the world of MDMA
I did a couple times, it's nice but it's a high. Short term high. If that's what you like, good for you, but my mdma moments or any drugs for that matter are definitely not in my top best moments of my life.
It may be overrated, yet it was nice to be lifted out of my practical, goal oriented, and often dark world view for a few hours during which I simply existed in harmony. Not something I would like to base my life around but learning my perception is not the only frame of reference was a valuable experience.
Try Heroin.
Or watch 'Requiem for a Dream'
Yes, I seriously recommend this. I told my sister to watch this movie, gave her a DVD, and told her to just enjoy. Told her it's like Inception.
Cue a few hours later with her saying "Ew I'm never doing drugs or having sex". Mission accomplished.
Lets add "Waking Life" to that list.
Best. Movie. Ever.
I watched it for the first time around a year ago, I found it terribly boring except for the whole double dildo sex club scene. It just doesn't hold up well with time.
Definitely a great movie! Wouldrecommend/10.
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She's 11? If she's already doing that we have bigger problems.
Unless you seriously think she'd fuck 12 dudes at age 11. Then we got bigger problems.
Thanks for the recommendation. Just watched and it honestly feels like it changed my life.
That movie is 100% bullshit. It's fucking ludicrous that it gets any respect.
Go experience shit for yourself. I used to deal heroin. The world of heroin addicts is nothing like that movie. It's not necessarily great, but that movie is a complete joke.
Drugs are even more over-rated than sex. Are they fun? For sure. And that's about all of it.
They cost money and all you get for it is just some happiness you borrow from the tomorrow.
In before all those psyllocibin- and lsd-hippies babbling something about a greater experience. Those are the same people that some day discover that they missed out on Fibonacci in school and post twenty minute videos about the "divine" geometry and how they wished that their math teacher would have taught them about it.
And also in before the dopeheads who believe that cannabis is the wonder drug and able to cure everything including society and mankind. It won't.
That said, I don't really care what you do to your body, but be aware that you'll inevitably pay for drug use, either just short-term with a hangover, or long-term with lethargy, addiction or psychosis.
Also regular drug-users aren't really the people you want to be wasting your time with.
yeah I'm going to have to disagree with you right there.
Many drugs offer very mild hangovers (alcohol has the worst hangover of any drug I have tried in my life, and some drugs even have afterglows (a positive "hangover")) and profound effects. I don't like the hippie new age stuff surrounding psychedelic use, doesn't diminish their incredible effects.
If all you've ever gotten from drugs is "a little happiness" you're doing the wrong drugs. Drugs are, to me, and to most responsible users, the equivalent of a once-in-a-while experience, a hobby, where you sometimes go on "trips" by altering your consciousness temporarily.
I agree with you that regular drug-users are not people you should associate with too much, if you fear you'll get sucked into their lifestyle, but there is much to gain from responsible drug use.
Afterglow of benzos is awesome, that said: don't fuck w/ benzos. Life-ruining shit right there.
tell that to my test/tren/sdrol stack
Careful with the sdrol brah
Gave myself chemical induced hepatitis with it
Can I ask do you drink alcohol?
After my first time on shrooms I quite drinking alcohol. Now I only touch mushies, LSD, MDMA and weed. The only thing that gives me anything close to a hangover is MDMA but considering that's a once every few months thing I feel it's a great trade off.
You're playing with fire. The long term effects on your brain will eventually show up. Depression, anxiety, antisocial disorders.... As few as 20 trips can cause all sorts of damage.
Lol. Got any references there bud?
MDMA has been shown to treat PTSD http://www.mdmaptsd.org/research-category.html
Psilocybin/LSD needs more research but anecdotally it can be used to treat depression, OCD and alcoholism.
I suggest your read David Nutt's book 'Drugs without the hot air' and educate yourself.
http://media.economist.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/original-size/20101106_WOC504_0.gif
Legalize all drugs. That's fine with me. But don't lie to yourself and think constantly screwing with your brain won't have a negative impact. Send me over some MDMA or LSD and I'll do it. But I won't be making a habit out of it for sure.
If you've never had a psychedelic experience you'll never be able to be told how amazing it is because our language is not capable of it at the moment...and for you to try to judge people over those experiences because you don't understand it? That's fucked. Don't spout this nonsense about how you'll have to "pay" for using things like acid or mushrooms...or if you are, please post the studies that show this addiction and psychosis you speak of. Quit trying to be a cool guy hard ass and contributing to propaganda.
Caught the butthurt psychonaut.
I've twentyfive years of experience with recreational drugs, have taken nearly every one which is available on the market and I've been to places you only heard of and witnessed the rise and fall of so many people that I've lost count, and I've lost more than enough to mental instituitions, overdose and suicide. So please you quit trying to insult me with your puny accusations of repeating second hand propaganda.
Let me repeat and make myself clear: IDGAF about what you do to your body or your mind. I strongly support the freedom of choice to poison yourself and oppose the ban of any substance and the punishment for possessing or taking it.
However this does not mean, that I support the regardless encouragement to become an active user and the cult-like worshipping of those substances.
This includes tobacco and alcohol by the way.
Stop hanging out with low-quality people who do drugs.
with the exception of vaping. Aparently there are a lot of work-horse professionals who use it to keep from popping like a cork.
You are incorrect and its amusing looking down watching you stirring in your pot of shit stew.
To be more specific, you are incorrect on this statement:
I can give you concerete examples of you being incorrect but judging by your attitude you dont seem to want an actual discussion but just a rant because your meth addicted cousin broke into your garage one time and stole your lawnmower.
Fortunatly I do not have to live in that shithole you call a country where those kind of things happen.
Nice try though.
Oh awesome to hear. What country would that be again? Not mine (the shithole country) yours, (the one "those kind of things" don't happen).
Hey, just wanted to let you know you are a massive faggot and a coward. You anonymously call out that someone's country sucks and yours is superior, then you don't even say which country you are from when asked.
I don't know what it is about Germans and being complete elitist douchebag pieces of shit, but they really do excel at it. Your country literally had to be bitch smacked into suppression because you had a leader attempt to take over the world and exterminate people.
America and its allies liberate your country, allow it to become a thriving country that is today and not take it over as was customary for victors to do in wars.
Only then to have your people turn around and call our country a shit hole? The amount of cognitive dissidence required in that statement is mind boggling. I can't comprehend what sort of education system the Germans have that pump out people who dislike America so much, but I'm assuming its something to do with your country getting its ass handed to it and being subservient to America.
Btw, I only stumbled upon another thread where you proudly proclaim your German heritage which is how I know what sort of disease you indeed are. The most amusing part of the ever pervasive Germany smugness and superiority is while they proclaim America to be a shithole you use and regularly visit a site that is American, that was created by Americans, is hosted in America, and where the primary language spoken is English. If you then can't see the irony of calling America a shithole whilst simultaneously regularly using American services and speaking English, you are a next level retard.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpBzDF7vXlU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tdsL4kvp_I
World's smallest violin? Do you even know the context of when using that is appropriate and relevant? You're like a child that just learned a few expressions and want to try them out or something. That saying is not even relevant in the slightest.
This is just a horrible stereotype your putting everyone into.
I can't change your mind, you obviously have a narrow minded view when it comes to psychedelics and you have no idea on how they work within your brain.
I know it's stupid. I immediately say so afterwards.
The point of including that isn't to recommend it so much as it is to illustrate that ALL experiences, from the productive to the life-threatening, will broaden your worldview and expand your frame of reference.
We are all human. Bad things will happen to us; either through our mistakes, poor decisions, or simple bad luck. But rather than wallowing in our failures and misfortunes, we can learn from them and ultimately emerge from the ashes even stronger. This all contributes to your development as a self-actualized, compelling person.
I've been homeless. I've been to jail. I do not recommend either. But I would be lying if i said I hadn't emerged afterwards as a better and more interesting person.
Jumping out of a plane without a parachute will broaden your worldview and expand your frame of reference...for a minute or two.
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Alright, you made your point. However, I think these should posts should remain so people can see the conversation and rationale behind the edit.
These people are seriously a bunch of pansies, damn.
Heroin doesn't do anything to your brain that would make you lose IQ points lol You just knew retards that did it, and convinced yourself it was the heroin. Lots of idiots do heroin, so not surprising, but no need to spread lies around. The main issue with doing heroin is being able to afford doing it for most people. The withdrawals can't even kill you.
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"Yes, it does. Extended periods without sleep, major metabolic stresses combined with often poor or nonexistent nourishment."
Nothing to do with heroin. Are you actually not able to understand that?
Yeah, you sound like a whiny retard. None of your story makes any sense either. Someone can't lose 100% residual income they don't have to work to produce lol
Enjoy being retarded.
Coke is probably what he was thinking about. That drug turns you into leo on wolf of wall street.
This, coke makes you feel like superman and life of the party, heroin makes you nod out on the couch
I chuckled. Both at this whole situation and at your response.
That said, great post OP.
Wat. Did OP actually say that? Why?!
Yeah, I don't think the OP was actually suggesting to do heroin, but just that your choice not to do heroin should be your own.
I actually know some pretty successful people who I look up to who have tried heroin, but I would never touch it. Maybe it's really not that bad or just people predisposed to addiction and shit are the only ones who fuck with it, but I think it's OK to be scared of it. I wouldn't fuck with a rattlesnake just because it can conceivably be done safely.
There is a sampling bias with heroin addicts. Due to the extreme taboo mythos that has developed around it, only people who are basically already junkies ever try it. So naturally stats on its addiction rates are sky high compared to everything else.
Just think about it. Lots of people probably do some coke casually, or maybe even drop acid with friends as a social thing, but no one casually brings heroin to parties.
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Keep being retarded and failing at life.
The main reason why so many people get addicted to heroin is because most people are already addicted to another form of opiates before they even try heroin so when they eventually do they become addicted immediately. If you did try heroin and were not addicted to another form of opiates and were not in the past you probably will not get addicted.
Pfffffft Nobody starts with heroin, they start with prescribed opioids, like hydrocodone & oxycodone
I agree that trying heroin is pretty stupid, but an average, well adjusted person is very unlikely to develop a heroin addiction.
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Just out of curiosity do you also feel this strongly about other opiates? Heroin is not even the strongest opiate out there. If I remember correctly heroin gets converted into morphine in the body.
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Everyone's aging aunt with back problems has used vicodin. That is NOT going to impress any adult women.
well you won't know if you're going to get a bad batch, od, or eventually end up sucking d for that h money until you try it, maybe it doesnt even happen right away but you go through a rough patch later and go to heroin
probably NOT a good idea,
If you're the researcher/computer hacker type you need to accept what I call the "serious sorcerer" image - knowledge is power. I'm a bit giggly and mental by beta-default and becoming stoic is helping me combat that. You want people thinking you are an expert that somebody depends on, rather than an obsessed enthusiast to be used and pushed around.
All too often I get the "oh so you're a gamer / game hacker" shit. Then I remind people how serious computer security is (even better if you relate it to their experiences) and suddenly earn a little respect.
How do you do this, I am in a similar field. Some fat girl the other day told me "You are like the kind of guy who used to make pipe bombs from the anarchist cookbook". Like Im some deranged hacker. So what do you say?
That's probably an agree & amplify you need right there. I laugh it off but then quickly tell them I'm the guy who defuses the pipe bombs. I've been going through some of the old DEFCON talks and this guy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JsVtHqICeKE was amazing - he switches into serious mode and reminds you that there are some really nasty people out in the world.
Keep the element of excitement, risk etc. in the conversation and use analogies everywhere. If they call you a wizard, you're doing it right. And while I'm not in an LTR, I could imagine how to romanticize some of this more physical hacking stuff. I'm fantasizing about teaching a little lockpicking... hell that's just an excuse for kino. If you start thinking you're on a 'sexy', mysterious, exciting career path and not just stuck inside an interesting hobby I think you'll project that image and be respected.
Can you explain to me how this might apply to a Liberal Arts student? I'm struggling to think of a situation where people would need to know something abut classical or post-modern literature outside of pub quizzes.
I believe these are worthwhile goals, and can definitely lead to a more balanced and enjoyable life. However, I question how some of these will contribute to a person being 'interesting' as defined by holding conversations with the average person.
The problem is that most of this, particularly hobbies, are not what you can even talk about with 99% of the population. Travel and experience is good, but when it comes to hobbies and interests nobody outside of a tiny niche will even care. Outside of literature graduate students and professors, who wants to talk about John Ruskin? How do you talk about cycling or jiu jitsu with the average person in a way that makes you anything but pretentious?
If you want something to talk about, particularly with those that share none of your niche interests, you have to be knowledgeable about things the average person finds interesting. Thankfully for me, I really enjoy watching movies (and am not nearly as fond of TV shows). Chances are I have seen the favorite movie of everyone in a room. Most movies in theaters that aren't kids movies I have seen at any given time. I also make it a point to see any movie that will be up for the big Oscars. This is something I have fallen back on when meeting strangers, particularly during informal social settings. Everyone watches movies and has an opinion on them, and you can create a perceived connection with someone pretty quickly by talking about their favorite movies. If someone thinks you have similar taste as them, they immediately associate you with the good qualities they believe themselves to have.
That's a fair criticism. What you mentioned is why I separated hobbies and interests.
Hobbies function mainly as an SMV boost. The point isn't to converse with someone about them. The fact that you do them makes you more interesting. With Jiu-jitsu, you don't discuss the intricacies with people so much as you impress them with your discipline, prowess, and "badass" appeal. When it comes to women, the benefit of my painting isn't my ability to discuss trompe l'oeil and color theory. Women are simply impressed my ability and they can coo over my artwork.
Interests are far more open ended and easier to engage in. Because they lack the tangible element, they are simpler to pick up and converse about. Modern cinema is definitely an interest. This is what I meant about "water cooler talk". Learn how to present your niche interests to the layperson (when an appropriate opportunity arises), and make sure you have more common interests so you can build commonality and rapport.
So forgive me, I just dabble in some of the terminology so I may have some of the buzz words wrong but I think the point of hobbies in this instance is not that they lead necessarily to being interesting, but that they give you "inner game". They help your frame and help define you as a person different from the other guys. And hopefully if it is something you enjoy it gives you a confidence that is not derived from other people's validation (or at least not directly, I guess people could still insult your artwork).
Having a hobby where you create something puts you in a different real accomplishment space from people who are "all talk". That in and of itself may only be interesting around people who appreciate the thing you created (underwater basket weaving for instance is only good for more than a "ohh ahh" to people that don't know shit about baskets). But if you truly are interested in your hobby it creates a time every week where you recharge, have a zone of confidence that even if you take a hit in a social setting you can go back to a hobby and "put the anger into your work" and make some music or art.
Similarly having ACTUALLY traveled some where is more interesting then just having read about it. No one can ever "one up you" about your travel story... you lived it, they didn't.
Then there are the "per-formative hobbies" like singing, dancing, magic tricks or comedy. These absolutely make you interesting provided you are good enough to stand in front of a group of people. (note interesting can be good or bad... the person who stands up and makes a fool of himself is interesting, as is the person who does really well, with people in the middle being sorta lost).
The other thing that hobbies do is give people who WANT to know you an "in". Imagine a woman (or anyone really) sitting next to two people on the bus both generally equal in physical attraction, Person A has no interests, and Person B, it is quickly found out, goes sky-diving (or more mundane makes clay pottery). How do you start a conversation with Person A? You can't, you have to guess and talk about trite stuff like the weather and movies.
Person B however has lots of questions the woman (if she is at all interested physically) can ask him... when was the last time you went sky-diving? Any close calls? (or what type of pottery do you make? where do you make them? etc). This is what interests and hobbies do in large part. They give you an easy way to say "here is my thing, if you want to make polite conversation with me ask me something about this thing and I will probably have something interesting to say". Hobbies generate questions that people want answered
But if you have nothing I don't know what to say to you and I don't want to risk making a conversation that might be a non-starter.
But that's just my perspective on it.
You want to have both highbrow and lowbrow hobbies and interests. Don't be the pretentious ass who's too good to watch TV, but don't be the vanilla guy who knows nothing beyond Netflix. This way you can be relatable and interesting at the same time, and can fit in with different types of crowds.
I've already watched all the sitcoms from the 90s, does that make me a netflix afficianado?
Good post, yet I am very curious about time management. How do you find so much spare time to pursue everything at once? I lift 3 times a week, do muay thai another 3 times a week - and now struggle to find time for yoga, photo courses, language learning courses... I want to learn guitar and play black metal for which I have a soft spot. So many things, so little time. Can someone with a day job draw an example of their weekly routine?
I agree. I don't want to sound like a downer, but how the fuck does anyone have this much free time? Between work and the gym, I'm lucky to get an hour or two to myself max.
There are 168 hours in a week. As soon as I realised this I stopped being soft with my time management. It's a finite amount of time, all you need to do is be disciplined and follow through. I'm certainly still a work in progress, but I feel like I'm fast tracking myself and coming closer to realising my potential just with self discipline alone. I manage a business, lift 4-5 times a week, maintain a (small) social circle, spin a few plates, and still have plenty of time to maintain my living space, look after my puppy and have enough sleep. I think if you start cultivating some more self discipline and mental fortitude you'll find you have more time for your hobbies and interests.
That's the best answer to time management. It's a simple as, cut out all the vices and you will have lots of time.
Also curious about time management. I just work and sleep, signed up for a gym but usually too tired to go during workdays. Maybe ill look into a time management app to track my time and adjust from there.
its called bullshit
you spend a considerable amount of time following a hobby and then you do it once a month
for example, i don't practice the piano anymore, but i make sure i can still play a few covers that i can sing along to if the opportunity arises.
I'm wondering myself too. Between work, my kids, and the wife. I can only manage to get a few hours for myself.
This is more geared towards the single guys with excess cash. All this shit costs serious money.
Well I currently train 20 hours a week between lifting, Muay Thai Wrestling and BJJ. Work and school takes up about 40 hours. I pretty much have a 12 hour day. I'm guessing your lifting and Muay Thai only takes up 6 hours so I'm sure you could make it work.
Upvoted despite the 'try heroin' thing. Just don't.
One thing that makes anything, even video games, look better is making money (or just trying to make money) from it. All of a sudden you're not wasting your time and money, you're trying to find a way to generate some side income. You're an entrepreneur, you're working towards a goal, you've got something interesting. It works nicely.
If you want to try to make money off of video games, its a crowded field, but being a streamer/youtuber can net a few bucks.
If you garden, write a blog describing techniques, supplies, whatever. Affiliate link to vendors and make some money.
Consulting is another good option. If you really like interior design, set up a website and hire yourself out to design for people. That way you're using someone else's money to satisfy your enjoyment of your hobby, but not relying on it for your basic income.
I guess it's time to start making a YT LP channel then.
to the minecrafts!
Brought to you by - male solipsism.
You can attract women even if you're the most boring shit out there(by male standards) just by having a teasing, self-amused and a cocky personality.
The urge to self improve is something that naturally follows after you know you can get a woman if you want. Not being a sex symbol, but being a normal person who can attract someone of opposite sex.
Guys who want to amass wealth, status, become interesting and other self improvement stuff, all while being virgins and trying to score a basic bitch, are putting a horse before the cart.
edit1: Maslow was right, follow the pyramid TL;DR Men and Women have different stances on *interesting
Part 2 directly discusses being funny, charismatic, amusing yourself, and making conversation. Part 1 is about the product, Part 2 is about the packaging.
you left out the most important part, which is money
it can fill in any of those areas, and even a decent amount of money can do that, especially under 30. i've gone on dates where I didn't even feel like putting effort in to conversation but if they think you're hot shit they go in to try-hard mode
I had to think about the "looks don't matter" posts from a few days ago, where as a good looking guy you can say whatever the fuck you want and women hamster it the right way.
Definitely do activities for yourself, but not to impress women. They only care about your status (looks are part of this) and not your words.
I thought of the same post, and I agree. It doesn't matter how interesting you are; if you're out of shape and poorly dressed, women are going to ignore you.
This is pedestalizing women and sex. The end goal of my life is not to find somewhere to put my dick -- it's to build a life that I will enjoy and can look back on fondly. Sex is an important part of that, but not the focus.
We can walk and chew gum at the same time, too; there's no reason why we can't improve ourselves and work on game simultaneously.
This can do it, but if you want to maximize attraction, you need to be physically attractive as well.
That's a contradiction in terms.
OP's post is gold for anyone who wants to not only make themselves more interesting, but also be able to succeed with women beyond drunk bar sluts and college girls. I.e., mature men.
Exactly.
This is why TRP gets straw manned by feminists and the outside community all the time. They think we're just another crappy PUA hub going for slutty bimbos at the bar or in the club.
I want to be able to gain skills to talk to a range of women with various hobbies and interests, for the next 50 years of my life.
Exactly. I'm boring as fuck in my opinion. But I have a fun personality (I guess). I just try to escalate fast before its revealed how boring I truly am. Until then, I'm shrouded in mystery.
Awesome post!
I would recommend looking into the science of behavior analysis as it is much more focused on outward behavior instead of trying to figure out what the hamster is doing. I have a B.S. in applied behavior analysis and it helped me see the world in a completely different light.
EDIT: added recommended readings
For an easy read, I'd recommend:
Walden Two
Don't Shoot the Dog
For a science-y book, I'd recommend:
intro class textbook
my capstone class textbook
Do you have any recommended reading?
For an easy read, I'd recommend:
Walden Two
Don't Shoot the Dog
For a science-y book, I'd recommend:
intro class textbook
my capstone class textbook
When you wrote "hog futures" I thought of reading the future from pig entrails. I don't think that's what you meant, but that would certainly be an interesting hobby to discuss over dinner.
For the non-financial people in the room, relate it to bacon. Everyone likes bacon.
Three years in and I learned a lot from this.
Gym, work, home, children - Repeat.
I might be building the path to success, but I can't recall many things in the last few years that have truly excited me.
you have to keep it exciting...do some one-time events that interest you (and see which ones you could turn into a hobby/interest) while still maintaining your routine.
They're minerals, not rocks...
But this advice is gold. Needed to hear this. Saved for future reference.
I'm saying this really late, but it still needs to be said: don't do this. A fight can end with one of you dead, brain-damaged or crippled, even if neither you intend it. Or your opponent's friends will jump in and kick you to death. Never "get in a fight." If you need to fight someone then go all-out right away and make sure he can't cause any damage. Maybe you can then regale women with tales of that one time you snapped someone's arm in half and broke his jaw and knocked out his teeth, but if that makes their pussies tingle you should probably move on.
Try heroin? You're a fucking moron.
He's clearly being sarcastic to make a point, I'm not sure why everyone is so butt hurt over this. It was a great post and this is all you pick out? Come on man.
Typically a knee jerk reaction from someone whose life, whether through themselves, family or friends, was affected by heroin.
the same reason the african prince scam works...
There is a statistically certain chance some idiot is reading these forums, right now, who will take that advice literally, and probably kill themselves.
Responsability is a big part of TRP.
What I took away from this:
"Get a tangible hobby."
Cool. I started drawing again and am learning more Spanish while speaking more French in my kitchen.
Annnddd...bookmarked. I'm sure I will be re-reading this post. Thanks for this, man...helpful to me, as a noob.
I wonder what the recommendation would be if you have NO worthwhile hobbies or interests and no idea where to start? In that case, just choose a hobby with the highest possible utility in the job market (something like a language or programming)?
First pick a default MGTOW hobby, this is something you enjoy *so much*, your life would be bearable if you were forever alone for the rest of it. This is a fail safe. It can boost your SMV, or it can be completely antisocial. This is not for other people it is for you. That way, no matter how much a woman fucks you about, you'll be able to say "well, at least I've got X to look forward to" rather than falling into depression. You will recover quicker from the brutality of the SMP, if you have this.
It is important that you truly enjoy it though. Not just passively engage it to distract yourself, like say video games. (If your eyes light up from gaming, then yes make video games your failsafe. They won't get you laid except with fake #Gamergirls so who gives a shit)
Obviously don't be an idiot, porn's not a hobby it's an addiction.
After that, yes I'd recommend highest possibility job market utility as you describe. Languages is probably better for an SMV boost, whatever floats your boat.
Of course a physical hobby should be on there by default.
If you don't drink you're a boring cunt and all your stories suck!
-Jim Jeffries
Quality post. The part about falling into accidental monk mode hit hard for me - do you feel you're in a position to write a post about how to build a social circle with clear actionable steps?
Part 2 will address that. It's not as difficult as it seems.
Excellent, looking forward to it!
Nah, fuck that. Video games are a hobby. In Korea, its an entire fucking culture. I don't give a shit if people think its not substantial. I enjoy it, and its what i do to relax and bond with friends. Think whatever you want about games, to me, they're a passion and a respected art form.
yes but what OP said is that if you start talking to most girl about gaming, even though you are passionate and skilled (that is actualy probably worse) they will see that as a bad thing.
of course there are exceptions - my exgf of 2 years was a casual gamer and we really bonded over some games we played together be it a multiplayer pvp, multiplayer coop or even single player when we took turns and the other person was watching on a big screen (i have a projector in the living room plugged to my pc)
One of the better written posts Ive seen on this board. The three tenets of physical, creative, and mental activities are great goals. This post should go on RoK.
This is a planned 2-part series on how to become more interesting. It began as a concise guide that quickly became much more comprehensive.
TL;DR If you’re on TRP chances are you’re a boring Reformed Beta. You can become not boring by having tangible skills, cool interests, and exciting life experiences. Maintain an active social life. Watch stand-up and well-written TV/movies to develop your sense of humor and become funnier. Practice approaching and have conversations with as many people as possible to develop your charisma and ability to communicate effectively. Hanging out with losers will make you a loser. Make sure your friends are quality people who add value to your life.
This is the best RP article I've read in quite a while...I'm looking forward to your next post. The framework is there in your main points...you've led folks to water, let's see how many will drink.
Substitute heroin for cocain.
I think donating some time to the less fortunate or needy is a huge part of developing as a man. Plus it develops your social character. Most people are staring into their phones or some other screen all day. Learn to talk to others.
I felt I needed to read this
I am Alpha, on paper. Initially you look at me and I seem like the real deal but there is something missing and it really is summed up by 'accidental monk mode'. I really do need to work on becoming a more captivating individual with experience, someone who is fun and emotionally engaging.
I went through the entirety of high school Alpha on paper. Gym, straight As…socially awkward as fuck
I actually believe that you'll get laid more being less aesthetic, say 15% body fat, and interesting as fuck in terms of your personal life, than being model-tier but doing FA. This'd follow on from our SMV being about more than just looks, unlike that of women.
This my end goal. To be able to visit the amazon, hike in random exotic places, skydive, travel the world, etc...but at 20 years old I gotta make a career first. Until then...no distractions. Just study, lift, work, sleep, occasional fuck, and repeat cycle until I'v made it .
I first read that as "being able to visit amazon.com" lol.
I think you missed the point of the article with your cycle there. No need to wait until your career is made first. You can gain experiences without doing those exotic (expensive) endeavors. Learn a new language, take a dance class, study a subject you've always found interesting, etc.
Once you are in career mode, you'll be able to do those worldly endeavors. Think about how much more fun traveling to China or Japan would be if you knew intermediate Mandarin and Japanese?
That's what everyone thinks - I'll do it later (when I've ......)
It won't happen if you don't force it. Do it. Plan it. Now.
I've been to retirement parties at work (when I used to work as an employee) where the guy said that as a 19 year-old he only wanted to work there for 6 months before going overseas to travel. He was 65 as he said this - and had never left the company, or traveled.
Do it now - there is no better time to discover and enjoy life; without kids, wife, mortgage, etc...
Oh yeah... don't forget "lift".
Is everyone on RP obsessed with lifting weights or something? It's getting sad now. Repeatedly lift something up and put it back down again, what an exciting and interesting way to spend your time.
Now don't get me wrong. If you like weightlifting, that's fine. I'm not really criticising that. It's good fitness, and probably does make you look pretty good; but this mantra that guys should "lift" is bullshit and you know most of the guys saying it are skinny little geeky boys who've never had a toned muscle in their life.
You have a valid point, but nah I've been lifting for almost 6-7 years now since I started back in highschool.
What I would add, is that men have to be the STIMULUS in a social situation, to which women will then provide the RESPONSE.
The cocky/funny guys are delightful to women because they provide the stimulus, and the women then are ready to respond to that.
Yeah I don't do any of this, no wonder my life sucks.
Have you started doing any of this shit since bro?
I'm at the point where I have all the basics down: I lift, I read RTP daily, I have hobbies, I'm relatively interesting/fun, and I know what I need to do next. I have to go out there, make like-minded friends, approach girls, and experience the world. The hardest part is actually doing it. I know what has to be done, but it's scary.
Brave men still get scared of the road that lies ahead sometimes. The only difference between a brave man and a pussy is that he feels that fear and does it anyway.
I like this. I always had a hard time compartmentalizing different aspects of my life into useful and forward process.
The only thing I would change is instead of Hobbies, change that to Skill.
Great post.
Thank God I have bodybuilding. It encompasses all three, perfectly, in my opinion.
Absolutely man. And for me since I'm on 5x5 derivatives it always keeps me on track.
I think what you are saying is right on point. Developing yourself across the entire realm of your personality is essential to creating your complete masculine self; fully armored and immune to the Feminist Imperative. These are some of the steps that help create deep, lifelong long Frame and Game.
"Hobbies have tangible results." No, they don't have to. That is an arbitration that YOU added to the definition of a hobby. Video games are a hobby, the same as collecting stamps, or building model airplanes, or model train sets. How is my high-score, or proud collection of games, any less "tangible" than those?
I'm sorry that it's not a hobby that you consider helpful in getting laid, but I couldn't give a shit. That's true rp.
about the physical... Not having weights or a gym membership is no excuse. Go to the store and get a 10# dumbbell. You can use this as a substitute for a rowing machine. Each repetition (think sumo dl) is 10 meters. A great workout is 5x500-400-300-200-100m sprints with 90 seconds of rest in between each interval. Do that on Tuesday, then on Friday, do a 3000m row for time (goal is 1.5 miles in 10:00 mins). You can build some crazy forearms from deadhangs at parks... I'm sick of people making excuses.
Okay, you gotta break that down. I'm assuming the 10# dumbbell is 10 lbs. What about the sprints though?
Do 50 sumo deadlfits as fast as you can, rest 90 seconds, repeat 4 more times. Then do 5 rounds of 40, 5 of 30... etc
To be honest this sounds incredibly beta to me. I personally know some women who enjoy videogames. It's not a hobby because it's like watching TV or Netflix and those are interests not hobbies, but if you care SO MUCH about what women think about your interests you're very beta IMO.
This post is stupid as fuck.
"Don't do what others think is lame, do what I think is cool" is the most beta shit of all time.
I'm no hc cool fun guy, I played video games for like the last 10 years of my life.
However, for example. This weekend I had a plate over at my new place. She sat in my bed and caught up on Game of Thrones while I assembled my new furniture from Ikea, made myself a couple meals/tea/coffee, ran my hordes of laundry through the washer and dryer a few times in between it all, and I cleaned part of my bathroom + made a few phone calls. I tried showing her how to play League of Legends vs bots but that went horribly and I just quickly finished the match. I have a shit ton of laptops and desktops at my place because I work in IT so I have one at the dinner table, my work desk, and 1 in my bedroom. So when we eat at the dinner table we browse like r/WTF or watch Dog Whisper videos or something (just examples from this weekend).
Either way, every time I came back to my bed to take a break she got all tingly to have me next to her. Old me would have just sat in my bed for 12 hours and watched the show with her like a pleb, until one of us made a move. Simply doing chores makes it feel like shit actually goes on where I live - in reality it doesn't lol. Plus I love living in a clean environment. You can honestly always substitute cleaning for anything if you want to feel productive.
Obviously, there are way better ways for me to be a more interesting person. I have put up Art I used to do from High School/College years around the place. Even though it looks like shit, it's still neat to look at shit, better than a bare wall. I have lots of sports memorabilia on the walls as well. I'd like to get more Art but financially not really a priority atm. I'd really like to jog more, as much as I don't care for cardio, I miss running.
Saw this posted recently. "The best game is to have a life."
/u/Greentoads41 has been the only one to mention that all of this is worthless without storytelling ability.
My life is very busy (I have a heavy school load plus lab work), and pretty boring. But I can still be interesting because I have story telling ability. SOMETHING interesting happens to almost everyone each week. The trick is that you have to notice, remember, and know how to share these few moments.
Good story telling is a combination of knowing your audience, humor and conciseness. Figure it out.
As a non-red piller, I agree massively with this post.
It's very creative and helpful, and I agree with most of it's points. Except for the bits at the top and Experiences
I mean, the things you described that makes women desireable is essentially just an advanced pocket pussy, if you're going to be (hopefully) spending your entire life with someone, wouldn't you rather it was someone who was also interesting?
To me, someone with the same interests as you so that you could discuss, make references and work on projects together would be way better than the sort of person that can be easily replaced by a drive to Starbucks
Women are like an empty jar that you have to fill with content. They will mirror you and your behaviour in a relationship.
I do not care if a woman knows literally nothing at all if she enters a relationship with me. I will have to teach and educate her inevitably so I might as well teach and educate her on the topics which interest me while I am at it.
I disagree, though I have seen plenty of women like this, that parrot their male's interests. These type as caelum19 described don't interest me. Unfortunately... most those who end up thinking for themselves align with feminist tendencies... aka the no-go zone.
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Yeah, I'm getting a little irritated with the constant scorn I see people directing toward digital entertainment, as though just by consuming it you become someone unworthy of love or attention. When I ask some people what their issue is with it, they say something like, "Oh, it's a huge waste of time." And watching your favorite television series isn't?
But here's the real reason video games get shit on, by unaware men and women alike: Games require an amount of active interaction and attentiveness, and the gynocentrism in our society informs us that if a man is directing his attention toward something that doesn't result in the accumulation of resources for a woman's disposal, the activity is thereby worthless.
So that's why some women shit on games, because it doesn't benefit them in any way if a man is enjoying himself without her approval / help. And because some men get rewarded by women for rejecting games, they start to think their hobby is bullshit also.
Gamer anger! oh no! As good a hobby as any, but if it supplants pussy you are already emasculated!
Hobbies are good for building social value, especially if they can be shown / shared with others. I like sailing. You don't need them for meeting girls at bars as much as social circle game or keeping a high quality girl around.
Don't forget pumpkin spice lattes from Starbucks. Basic bitches love pumpkin spice lattes.
You are writing mixed messages, one is to work on goals, the other is to do shit to make your life more exciting. You just end up chasing more exciting stuff like sky diving, while accomplishing less and being less happy because with each high is a low. Its a slippery slope but you have to go through it to understand sometimes.
At first I thought you said "boring buck"
from m-w.com on "buck";
a : a male human being : man b : a dashing fellow : dandy
Here is my biggest question: How on Earth do you find the time for all this stuff?
A handful of things on your list I have wanted to incorporate into my life - but I'm a PhD graduate student - how do you find the time for so many hobbies and activities???
The trick is to not do it all. Pick one to 2-3 and stick to them for 1-2 months. Backlog other activities you discover in that timespan and tackle them in future iterations.
If you want to get really good at the hobby, it will take longer than the 1-2 months. That's more 'getting the basics down'.
I keep lists of things to do with Google Keep. It works pretty well for me.
I do the same with Google Keep. I have a habit of getting slightly overwhelmed with things I want to start doing though because there are a decent amount of them. I'm slowly learning to do what you said though and not have a mindset where I "must/have to do this thing today".
Thanks a bunch for this post. This was my biggest problem i was having with swallowing the pill. Now I finally have an idea how to get started improving myself as a person. Not just getting in better shape. I look forward to the next post. Thanks again.
Wow, this is some amazing life advice. Thank you for sharing and hopefully helping those of us who need help.
Great post. This with a schedule and some meaningful goals is what I'm trying to go for. Though I feel like I'm walking instead of running towards this. hallucinogens sounds like it might help. Everything in moderation.
Drinking beer -----> brewing beer ---------> profit
i have a friend who does this. except for the profit
You profit by paying less per beer you would otherwise drink anyways
Saved! Very good post thank you.
First time I've read a TRP post and said "Yep I'm literally doing all of that."
I even got the three spheres of hobbies! Weights, Writing, and Learning Italian.
And I love accidental monk mode sometimes. I've been there more since my wingman moved away. I need a new wingman.
I was just thinking of how boring as fuck my life is man, thanks for the advice. good post.
The guy who plays the actor, Jonathan Goldsmith, actually did an IAMA here. He's a legitimately interesting person in real life. Guy has been to dozens of countries and does all kinds of fun stuff. One guy asked him if he plays video games.
"Never have"
Read the entire IAMA, really interesting. This guy knows how to do it.
High five OP, this shit is legit. I have been searching TRP for a post just like this. I feel like I have almost everything else checked off, but the most difficult and painful one to deal with seems to be the lack of personality I have. As men, we are entitled to nothing. Great post, thanks again.
Solid post. Need more shit like this on here and AskTRP. Thanks.
I hate playing devil's advocate, but if a girl is into playing video games, BY ALL MEANS, discuss video games.
It seems to me that if someone lifts, dresses well, and practices game the rest of the activities on this list just give diminishing returns. How many girls are really going to go from repulsion to tingles based on the fact that you read Eckhart Tolle or Dostoevsky?
It seems that if you build physical attraction and keep an air of mystery about you, women will assign you interesting characteristics in their mind without you saying a thing. Similar to the halo effect.
I'm not saying these things are without value, but it seems they are more valuable to a mans own sense of worth rather than for building your SMV.
No this is only true for bar sluts. If you're not interesting then au contraire, over time your looks will hold diminishing returns.
Hamsters gon' hamster but there are still women out there who managed to get Masters and phDs, if you want to date them you can't be a dumb fuck. If you practice Game then you'd learn to apply it to your and her interests.
They're also invaluable should you ever decide it's time to go Monk Mode or MGTOW.
Incredible and well-put advice to life in general. Quality post overall, thanks mate.
I don't fucking want to be interesting. I like doing my own boring shit. If a woman is not interested in my boring shit I could not possibly care less.
Or I could just fuck hookers. Lol Like some fake relationship with a women is worth doing all of this bullshit.
a brother still in the anger phase.
you are not doing this for some fake relationship with women. these activities enrich you. they give you happiness. a meaningful happiness compared to jerking off and similar activities.
Shutup bitch. Stop nagging me and trying to tell me what I should do and not do. I do what I want.
Something about this post just seems way, way off. Being interested is not the same as being interesting. Feigning interest in some lame-as-hell topic like floral arrangement or archaeology will get you nowhere. Actually being interested in a topic won't get you much farther. Your eyes might light up when you talk passionately about American history, but then how does that make you any different than this guy?
http://www.theonion.com/articles/area-mans-intelligence-probably-just-too-intimidat,33916/
There are certain things that you have to do if you want to succeed in a red pill reality, whether you have any motivation or passion for them or not. Work out, eat right, dress well, etc. If you can't commit to these you need to gtfo because you will almost certainly fail and when you do no woman is going to listen to your excuses. (I don't mean you personally oc, this is for those looking for excuses)
The rest you should be doing because you enjoy it. Not just to get pussy. Pussy and even dates/plates is just a side dish, the main course is "holy shit this is interesting" "wow this makes me feel great" etc.
The goal should be to have stuff in life you value OVER pussy and gynocentric validation. Then you come to the SMP from abundance mentality, and the IDGAF if I'm laid tonight or not attitude that will attract.
You then filter out the women you're interested in by whether they are into your hobbies. You're the prize, if she doesn't fit your frame she's nexted.
You can let her in if she's willing to learn more of course.
Then you have the problem I have.
You see everyone else as boring.
When you are the interesting person, average people are, pardon my french, boring as FUCK.
Sad but true, and for them, you are seen as pretentious and self-aggrandizing, because they immediately see your knowledge on the subject as an insult to their lack there-of. If I see a conversation steering in that direction, I take the focus off me.
relates to the whole don't be a tryhard idea. You shouldn't have to spew your knowledge of your hobbies/interests to impress people - you should do it because you find it interesting AND think they might too. Release info in small batches and see if they respond favorably before you continue on the same path.
Does your activity gain Facebook Likes? If it does, then you're doing well.
A buddy of mine works a pretty boring office job. A typical cubicle hell. He then uses his spare time to hit the gym. The gym is a typical activity these days and great for staying in shape but doesn't pull the pussy like you'd think. He stepped up his gym and joined boxing. The guy studies boxing! Lifting hard is one thing, but taking punches puts it to a whole other level.
But wait.. there's more!
His other passion is his motorcycle. Meh anyone can own a motorcycle but what he really likes to do is race his. He joined a club that teaches him how to race, get great lap times, and even goes out on a professional track. So how interesting is this man?
He races motorcycles and does kick boxing. That bit alone makes him interesting to droves of women. Not his job, not his wealth, and they even over look his race and height (5'6" Indian)
Have tangible hobbies men. And if your hobby is something that you see pro's do like hunting, fishing, then trophy your accomplishments!
I dunno, my most intimate and best experiences with the hottest women I've been with have all involved psychedelic drugs.
Agree, drug use will generally lead to more sex, especially in the beginning.
But most people aren't careful enough to use them responsibly so it's a catch 22. And Advocating heroin use is some hilariously bad advice.
The most beta "hobby" a man can possibly have is being a sports fan, nothing else comes close. Video games were social suicide back in the 90s but these days they are pretty acceptable in moderation, however living vicariously through other men is pathetic and women see it as that. If you are a sports fan, you need to grow up, take a look at your life and fill your time with something more productive.
Whenever I'm talking to a guy and he changes the subject to his football team, I not only become instantly disinterested but I feel sorry for him.
This is ridiculous. I'm not a die-hard sports fan at all, but what you're saying is it's "beta" to admire peak physical skill in other men. These guys are literally the very best of human physical ability! Being a "fan" of that is qualitatively no different than liking music or a painting by some artist. Of course, everything in moderation.
A lot of this goes without saying but what I struggle with, especially now as a married man and father, is how to get 'into' a given hobby with my limited time and money.
Furthermore, I struggle with whether I should already be into something before I make it a hobby, or just choose something and start trying it.
The first part is the limiting issue (structural), the second is the..... making it worth it..... issue.
If its something I am going to lose interest in anyway and give it up it isn't worth it to start because if all I am doing is getting a hobby to make my wife want me more or attract other women, I'm not doing it for the right reason. And then I find that when I eliminate that reason, the pool of potential hobbies becomes less appealing because the tangible benefit goes way down.
You mean girls don't like guys who can get to level 57 on Waifu gaiden III? :(
All the time spent wasted reading this post could have been spent bettering yourself. Some subreddit can't help you if you are asking the internet for social help.
Stopped reading when you said try boxing. Such retarded advice, most boxers now avoid sparring, unless you are getting paid the long term health problems are not worth it.
Im just making this comment so I can read it better at home.
Seems like a good post, but not sure how you would do all of these things and also have a job? Is this advice for after you become wealthy and just have nothing but free time?
What would your advice be for people who are naturally introverted? I have hobbies and get along with people very easily, but I don't develop deep friendships often partially due to the fact I generally like being on my own more.
In my experience, this is only true for a while. I always make it clear to my girls that I am open and poly and that they are just one of a select few I choose to spend my time with. The girls I'm with are fine with this for a while, but they will almost all eventually go on their own way (sometimes, they start drama, and I need to cut them). One or two have gone on to their own poly cliques but many times they've left me for a more beta provider. Some of them come back for a little more, but most just stay away and focus on the guy who can give them his all. In one extreme case, the guy had no job, lived with his parents, and was extremely controlling and jealous (he knew about me and hated it). But because he wanted to give her his all, and she knew I wasn't willing to give up my other girls for her, she was like "I don't think I fit in here." In another case, a girl who I had collared as a slave found a guy who would marry her, the ultimate goal, right? So while she loved my D/s instruction, she wanted that more, and really my D/s instruction was geared towards her finding a partner like this.
I really like first paragraph lol... dick slick
I love the way this post was written, OP. You're a great writer. It's so amusing and witty as it goes on. Ever tried going for stand up comedy?
btw, gym isn't considered an acceptable physical hobby to women
That depends on your age and social circles. If you're at college or around that age, I'd agree. If you're over 30, or work in a Blue Pill profession, and you work out regularly, women will be impressed and you'll stand out.
Just jogging will do the trick. Most women aren't into the swole bro look.
BRAVO!
Very good set of rules to follow.
If there's one activity that combines all 3, it's Golf.
You work those core muscles. And if you hit 200 balls at the driving range, I guarantee you'll work up a decent sweat.
In golf, technique is everything. And just like an artist, practice makes perfect.
Mental ability and focus is highly crucial in this sport. Good golfers are able to visualize their shot and plan ahead. Like chess.
This was exactly what I needed. God bless.
In a frat, I lift heavy and do outdoors shit.
what makes me interesting is everyone in Greek life knows me as a huge douche cannon. Black out or back out.
this will last till you graduate lol
DO NOT GET TOO INTO SKIING/SNOWBOARDING. That is if you ever want to get laid again. but then again you don't become a ski but for the bitches. Unless you are a chick ski bum, then remember this; "the odds are good, but the goods are odd."
I don't see anything wrong with skiing/snowboarding. Have done both, and have enjoyed both immensely.
The point of hobbies/interests is to become a more well-rounded person through gaining experiences. Taking on a hobby just to get a better chance at getting laid is against everything TRP stands for.
I mean, do people wrench on their cars just to get chicks? Doubt it.
Skiing/snowboarding as a hobby is fine. Being a ski bum is not. But it does provide for great stories.
Source: was a ski bum lived in a walk im closet for two years and a snow cave for one.