Broke up with ltr, found out later that she hooked up with friends wife while we were together.

comcain · 2020-11-01T18:44:16+00:00

Red flags. Be glad you're rid of her.

FeniZio94 · 2020-11-01T18:49:38+00:00

Trust me, she’s cheated on you before

Do some self analysis and see what made you (in regard of your psyche) accept her and why? You’ll be surprised as to the amount of info you’ll get from doing internal analysis, and it sure helps improve the frame

BlondeHornyElf · 2020-11-01T19:08:34+00:00

it's cheating if u never agreed that she could fuck chicks outside the relationship.. like she did keep something from you that you obviously have mixed feelings about.

it's still fucking a girl tho.. so don't get too hot-headed over it.. you'd be waaaaaaaaaaaaay more pissed off if your friend fucked her instead of his wife.

but either way this is disrespect and a major red flag so your instincts to break up with her were correct, so find peace in that.

benhurensohn · 2020-11-01T19:06:55+00:00

MOVE ON

Rohan98k · 2020-11-01T19:48:00+00:00

That's cheating for sure, regardless of the gender. Consider yourself lucky cause you saved yourself more issues down the line.All I see are red flags (just acc to me)She wasn't ltr material to begin with, neither did you screen her properly. Next time screen her well and lay down proper rules before you get into an ltr.

93_93_93_93_93 · 2020-11-01T19:29:24+00:00

100% chance that if your friend and his wife hadn't already had a threesome with your gf whilst you were still together, they will definitely do it now that she's your ex.

Casanova-Quinn · 2020-11-01T19:46:52+00:00

Even if you were ok with her hooking up with other girls, the fact that it wasn’t agreed to prior and she did it behind your back is not cool. That’s cheating behavior. Next.

Oland_Devo · 2020-11-01T21:33:31+00:00

[deleted]

vandaalen · 2020-11-01T21:21:02+00:00

cheating is cheating

VasiliyZaitzev · 2020-11-01T23:01:45+00:00

I don't have any issues with my girls lezzing out on their own time. I have dated some bi-girls and green light them for the box lunch if it comes up. If the other girl is down then I convert it to a girl-girl-Vaz threeway.

Strange dick? Nope. I also don't get confused about what their role is in my life.

tippytoes2020 · 2020-11-01T23:10:07+00:00

Yes, it’s cheating; unless you’ve discussed this with your partner before hand, you’re violating boundaries; doesn’t matter if it’s a man or a woman she’s shagging, I wouldn’t tolerate it either; pretty sure she would have been livid if you behaved the same way... and if she is telling someone not to tell you, she knows she’s doing wrong

JameisBong · 2020-11-02T02:18:30+00:00

It's cheating. Bisexual chicks are for fun times only, she should never be an LTR.

z2a1-9 · 2020-11-01T22:34:48+00:00

Should of tried for threesomes, and she's not ltr material. Enjoy these types for what they are and move on when you want to. No sense in getting butthurt, live and learn my man keep slaying, cheers!

El_Serpiente_Roja · 2020-11-01T23:48:39+00:00

bullet dodged ...you dont want your gf doing anything with her pussy that you dont know about

Lorddevonshire · 2020-11-02T04:40:40+00:00

Give it a year or two to finally hear the rest of the story. Commit yourself to growth. In that year or two you may reconsider calling these people friends. You might eventually consider them withholding their knowledge of her hooking up, and attempts to hook up as a betrayal.

In the end, she wasn't yours. Just your turn.

z2a1-9 · 2020-11-01T21:21:41+00:00

[deleted]

IXseed · 2020-11-01T21:08:24+00:00

Why do you care? She cheated and now ya'll are broke up. Just leave it.

catsdontsmile · 2020-11-01T21:43:41+00:00

I would not be cool with it and do consider it cheating but while it's still a shit sandwich it's less shitty than if it were a guy. Would you rather to be shat on your head or your foot? Clearly the foot but you're still getting shat on.

rp-Ubermensch · 2020-11-02T01:26:56+00:00

Here's I see things when it comes to cheating, would you do still do it if I was present, if you wouldn't but did it in my absence, that's cheating.

319Skew · 2020-11-02T03:26:24+00:00

If you aren't aware = cheating.

If you are aware then it's cuckin.

sowhattwenty20 · 2020-11-02T06:19:32+00:00

AWALT. They’ll seek validation and comfort using sex from men or women. Monkey-branching.

HoedownInBrownTown · 2020-11-02T08:11:17+00:00

Does your buddy know his wife has done this?

i-am-the-prize · 2020-11-02T15:23:16+00:00

" Anyway, found out from different friends wife a week after our brakeup that my gf went to her place one night after she left mine, (blah blah) than told her not to tell me. Seems like cheating to me. "

it's not cheating if she's single. she just wants her reputation to herself vs. her ex bad mouthing her; assuming she was trying to keep it quiet. i think she wasn't, i think she's fucking with you - why she picked a friends wife.

look, if you have a boundary and she crossed it, you next or demote depending on the severity or freq/chonic nature. period. she was pushing your boundaries so even if it wasn't for this reason this time, it may have been eventually.

also, she knew this would get back to you and knew it would bother you. do NOT let it. forget her, she's not cheating anymore when you're no longer with her. "makes me wonder what other shit she was doing behind my back..." no. no. no. this is what she wants, free rent in your head. you're being played. move on.

TrenWarrior · 2020-11-01T20:53:29+00:00

Should’ve Banged them both bro, then dropped their silly asses lol.

L2diy · 2020-11-01T21:03:15+00:00

Who cares

phellySL · 2020-11-01T18:54:38+00:00

I’m probably gonna get killed for this by y’all but personally I let my girl(s) fw other girls. BUT I set the boundary that it has to be like a stupid hookup & I have to be told about it before it happens. As in I should be invited to join in. None of them have taken advantage of that leeway bc they were hetero.

Now if she’s bi, that does change things, but personally not by much. Again I have to be told about it before & invited to join in.

But if she’s a closeted lesbian? Well then obviously we shouldn’t be together right?

fretty555 · 2020-11-02T07:10:56+00:00

Deception is the only felony. But still this is like a personal opinion type question, if it's something that bothers you then either stop letting it bother you, or remove yourself from the situation, once again in order to stop letting it bother you.

throwRA3141565 · 2020-11-02T07:59:52+00:00

unfamiliar with what girls call it when they f each other

"I don't even know how two women can make love...unless they just kind of scissor or something."

devilkingx2 · 2020-11-03T04:56:16+00:00

If you're not okay with it and she knows that, its cheating.

If it were me I would be fine with it as long as I got to see the action or join in.

embar5 · 2020-11-01T21:19:04+00:00

I think it's pretty hot personally. i'd just ask her why not involve me too?

mrrooftops · 2020-11-02T01:08:44+00:00

two things. Why are you jealous of female competition? And next.

Title	Broke up with ltr, found out later that she hooked up with friends wife while we were together.
Author	Oland_Devo
Upvotes	77
Comments	78
Date	November 1, 2020 6:40 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/jm7etl/broke_up_with_ltr_found_out_later_that_she_hooked/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/broke-up-with-ltr-found-out-later-that-she-hooked.323455 https://theredarchive.com/post/323455