It's Saturday, isn't it? I'm supposed to be sleeping in, why did I wake up so early? Anyways...

...

It'll be Fall in a couple of months - it's hard to believe it's almost been one year already. One year since I was in that depression, lost, adrift, and absolutely hopeless. One year since my body atrophied from its already slim frame. One year from having no direction in life.

And I remember what got me out of that agitating limbo. I remember waking up one day and finding that compass: "work on your health." I remember how, when thinking about what to do with my life, all I considered was my career, jobs, money, the "pursuit of excellence" and climbing the ladder. But then I woke up one day and realized, "Hey, what if I just focus on improving my health every day? There's no way I would regret that in the future, right?" And suddenly, I had direction. I started going to the gym every day, and for the first two weeks, all I did was stretch - yep, I would go the gym, lay a yoga mat, stretch, and then leave. It wasn't until after those first two weeks when I started doing push-ups and pull-ups, and then after a couple of months that I started lifting weights.

I remember how much better I felt as the days went along, how much stronger my body felt and how much clearer my mind felt. I wasn't thinking about what to do with my career or any of that - I was just focused on improving my health. And now, ironically but unironically, here I am, with a job and some passion projects on the side, content with myself and with the direction my life is headed in. It's only been a year, but I'm in such a different and better place today.

Nobody regrets the resources they spend on improving and maintaining their health. Nobody. There's nothing romantic about sacrificing it in exchange for some ambitious pursuit; this is a narrative that Hollywood has sold to the public: the starving artist, the tragic artist, the sacrificial artist. You can be a great artist without deteriorating your health.

Focus on your health, improve your body and mind, and pieces will fall into place.

*Note: I stumbled onto this journal entry somewhere on Reddit and thought others here might find it enlightening too**