Literarily everyone in our western culture has in some shape or form a sense of being alien to our society. We want to connect to people around us but we don’t. It is often said that the way to the top is a lonely road. But that’s only said by lonely people and it conveniently fits their lone wolf mentality. Become a tribe builder everywhere you go, and you will live a good life, an experienced life, a powerful life. These are your first steps to unplug yourself, to open your eyes.
Our reptilian brains are not adapted to our metropolitan world. We’re out of date models and we’re hungry to hunt, hungry to build shelters, hungry to trek, hungry for a band of brothers. But tribal life is never coming back and city life has its benefits, among which, a high volume of women to spin. The one true test on your heroes’ journey, in becoming who you are, to shed your boyhood and become a man, above all you must learn how to build and lead tribes.
Call your mom, your brother, your sister. Stop hiding behind your rectangles. Shed your passive frail consuming mentality and start engaging with the world around you. The number one key to become a tribe builder is to become assertive, to take initiative, to act instead of react, to tune in with the creator within you. The path to become superhuman is laid stone by stone. If a simple phone call makes you feel uneasy, here’s your first stone. Make a habit of calling family and close friends instead of texting them. Make a habit of greeting people and dogs on the street, greet the hobo, greet the cashier, greet the bartender smoking outside, greet the hiker, greet the old lady feeding pigeons, greet the guy next to you on the bus, greet everyone next to you in the gym. Call your mom again.
There are four key activities that mold men into brothers: chasing girls, globetrotting, friendly competition and dining. They all generate wealth in its purest form: power. For millennia, the status a man has in his society is build and reflected by the women he fucks, the places he travelled to, his athletic strength, and the men who dine at his table. Western culture has almost entirely lost touch with the last one. But it’s a powerful thing, to feed someone. Dining has been the backbone of many societies and it’s easy to see that men in societies who still maintain that tradition have stronger relationships with family, with neighbors, with fellow men in town. If you’re looking for some motivation to learn how to cook (looking at you who only eats microwaved junk): lifting will help you master your body, cooking will help you master your network. Make a habit of inviting a friend over for dinner on any given boring worknight. Everyone is bored. Everyone is tired. Everyone has to eat. Girls in our society have mastered the art of brunching for an hour from the age of 16, it’s not that fucking hard. Dining is the easiest way to bring people together. Bring people together. People will admire you.
You’ll spend your 24 hours and you’ll spend it on what you planned to do. If you don’t plan shit, you’re planning social media, or cheap shitty entertainment. Get busy. Cram your days to the point snoozing simply isn’t an option. The bare minimum on any given day should be: 7 hours of sleep, 8 hours of work, read 10 pages, sport 30 min, meditate, work 1 hour on your next passive income stream.
Lift, yes, but find a team sport too. Don’t know where to start? Call your brother or sister. Ask a friend to go for a run tonight. It doesn’t even have to be a close friend. You’ll be amazed how many guys go running alone and would love to find a running pal. Every university offers a wild range of sports where you can tag along and get to know many great people. In Europe, you don’t even have to be in university to join the sessions.
You become an adult when you realize there’s no such thing as adults in this world. You become a social guy when you realize everyone is awkward and most people remain awkward until they die. Most lonely guys I know always tell me the same crap: ‘No one ever asks me to go anywhere.’ Make a habbit of inviting people to dine, sport, go for a walk, go shopping. It doesn’t have to be planned. Just call when you’re on the way.
Your life only begins when you figure out everything you do together, you can do alone.
Your life is outside. Or did you really think that one day staring at this rectangle in front of you would become life-fulfilling?
If you take away the rectangles, how many rooms did you visit in the last week? How many people did you actually have a conversation with? Social media is cancer, the illusions they give us of being in the world are paralyzing, utterly soul-destructive.
When you have your own life outdoors, meeting people comes naturally, inviting people to come along comes naturally.
If there are no people in your life, it’s because you don’t have a life. Go outside. Create a life. It is the only way.
If you don’t know what to do: be bored. Sit on a chair and do absolutely nothing. Sometimes it can take ten minutes, sometimes half an hour. But when you move you will understand that anything is better than getting a quick shot of life through the eyes of a movie character or social media. Creating a life is hard. It’s difficult. But the smallest creation - like getting out of your fucking door, fixing your bike or cleaning your shoes – can be bliss if you see it for the greatness it is.