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Wife is 5 weeks pregnant (food cravings)

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February 6, 2020

Since my wife telling me she is pregnant last Friday, I have been presented with a variety of challenges. On Saturday and Sunday, I was woken up at 4 AM to make her the food she was craving (one night it was a waffle, the next it was steak). Over the weekend she was craving wings twice (40$ total), on Monday she goes Moes at work (10$), and then she bought Chinese for dinner (20$). Granted these have lasted for multiple meals but her cravings are getting out of hand. This morning I got fed up because I saw she spent 10$ on some Jamaican food (I noticed on Mint since our bank accounts are linked for financial purposes).

I confronted her about this over text (about an hour ago) and told her this is getting out of hand and I am setting a food budget with her tonight. Granted, I understand that women have cravings during pregnancy and all of their senses get intensified as well as they start liking certain foods they did not like and hating foods they used to like (based on smell, taste, etc.)

She tried using the whole "But I am pregnant thing again....I cannot control what I want to eat, IDK what I want to eat until 30 mins before I eat it, I am stressing her out, it is hurting the baby, I made her cry at work, etc.

I can handle the additional hormones (basically just seems like a 9-month long comfort test so far), but if I cannot set an immediate boundary with this early I know it will get out of hand and will affect our savings plan.

I also still want to be considerate, but within reason. I can workout 100$ a month if she craves different items that often, but 80$ in one week is crazy to me. I have not told her this plan yet and she is throwing a tantrum over text, but this is what I want to present tonight as well as other things. The past three nights she has also refused to cook saying she does not like the smell of food cooking and if I want to eat I need to make it. (Our old dynamic was she cooks and I clean the dishes after we are done eating). Granted I know that fatigue is common in the first trimester but part of me also feels like she is milking the situation to be lazy and spend money.

I know other members on RPC have gone through dealing with a pregnant wife before so I was also wanting to get some input on how you handled this and other things I should expect etc.

Post Information
Title Wife is 5 weeks pregnant (food cravings)
Author AlanNoles
Upvotes 4
Comments 7
Date 06 February 2020 06:02 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askRPC
Original Link
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
comfort test

[–]redwall926 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

You got up at 4a and made waffles and steak.

I mean ... I like a good waffle. And I love a good steak.

But bro ... you set the expectation. Do you regularly get up at 4a and cook? If so, then cook on my brother. If you don't, then why are you doing it now?

As for the money... did you have a good budget before this happened?

As for the text (about an hour ago) ... have you not read anything around here? Text is for logistics only. What the heck are you doing trying to institute some new budget thing over text?

[–]AlanNoles[S] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

I did not institute the plan. I basically said we will talk about this more later instead of buying into her drama over text. But I think 100$ a month is a reasonable amount.

But bro ... you set the expectation. Do you regularly get up at 4a and cook? If so, then cook on my brother. If you don't, then why are you doing it now?

True. And I voiced this on Sunday and it has not happened since.

[–]redwall922 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

You "voiced this"? Voiced what?

Your actions scream louder than anything you voice with mouth noises.

Just don't get up and cook at 4a. No need for an announcement of some sort.

I get the sense you need your wife's assurance she's going to back your actions before you take your actions.

[–]AlanNoles[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bad wording over online. On Sunday going into Monday I just did not get out of bed. She woke me up and I said No I have work and kept sleeping.

She made herself pancakes that night by herself. Since then, the getting up at 4 AM has stopped.

And thanks for the food advice. I have been looking into stuff today food wise. I want to make a plan that both of us will actually stick to.

[–]redwall922 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

The past three nights she has also refused to cook saying she does not like the smell of food cooking and if I want to eat I need to make it.

About this ... definitely have heard that before. And I will NOT knock this coming from a pregnant woman. We've got five kids.

Maybe your wife is bowing out of work she doesn't feel like doing like ... you are alleging she is. Who knows?

Either way ... make what you want to make. The kids and I had bacon and eggs so many times while my wife was pregnant. And you know what? I freaking love bacon and eggs. I would eat bacon and eggs 4-5 nights a week no problem.

Do some prep work ahead of time man. Come up with 4-5 meals that you absolutely love. Do you like shrimp and grits? I freaking love shrimp and grits. So I made shrimp and grits a few times while my wife was pregnant. I left the shrimp out of the cheesy grits for her the times that the shrimp turned her stomach. Come up with another 2-3 'so-so' meals that are super-simple for you to make on a time crunch. And when she doesn't feel like cooking, make what you want to eat that's within budget ($$ and time). And then eat.

[–]Rifleshoot2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

So yes, women get cravings when they are pregnant, but you are a man. You do not have to cater to her every whim. If she is 9 months pregnant and can hardly get up to waddle over to a waffle iron, then helping her out is fine. However, since she is just now pregnant, how about you let her go fulfill her own cravings? As far as the budget goes, you set the budget. If she wants expensive foods while pregnant that falls outside of what you consider reasonable, just say no. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. She might pout for a minute, but it will be forgotten quickly. There will come a point when she is pregnant and may need extra help with things, and you should absolutely do so if she needs it. But if she is just now pregnant, she is more than capable enough.

[–]Willow-girl0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Present her with the problem -- "Your cravings for takeout is breaking the budget" -- and let her provide input on the solution. Maybe she would prefer give up some of the money budgeted for her clothing, makeup, etc., in order to satisfy her cravings? Or maybe she will choose to work more hours, sell some unneeded items, etc.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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