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The Critical Importance of Approaching Attractive Women in Real Life

Reddit View
July 26, 2015

Listen up. You can improve yourself all you want. Bust your ass in the gym, eat right, dress and groom yourself well. Improve your career, make a pile of money, and acquire a bunch of interesting and sociable hobbies. You're now doing what you can to improve your SMV. Congratulations.

It's not enough, though.

It's really important to remember the PUA culture out of which the Red Pill was born. You may not consider yourself a pick-up artist, and that's fine--the whole movement, Mystery, Neil Strauss, etc. is a little bit silly. I'm not going to disagree with you there.

But one thing they got absolutely right was the fact that approaching women and closing the deal is a numbers game. The more women you approach, the higher your chances of success. Furthermore, the more experience you attain, the more practice you get, the better you'll be at it; your game will be better, you'll be smoother, and you'll know what to say and when to say it to bring the girl home.

There is no substitute for experience in this avenue. No amount of swiping right on Tinder or messaging hotties on FB and Instagram is ever going to come close to the simple and straightforward act of approaching a woman in person. So grow a pair of balls.

Don't want to hit the club, you say? Don't like those kinds of girls? That's fine. I don't know if you've noticed, but it's summertime and attractive women are everywhere. At the mall, the gym, the grocery store. In yoga classes, in line at coffee shops--in short, EVERYWHERE. So grow a pair and start approaching. Stop letting the fear of rejection cripple you. Stop worrying about "what if." Stop thinking and just act.

Don't let the blue-pill/feminist shaming get inside your head. Contrary to what they might say, approaching a random woman on the street is not harassment and never will be--just so long as you leave the girl alone if and when she clearly expresses her disinterest. I'm not looking to bother anyone, and the minute I know I'm bothering a girl, I'm happy to move onto the next girl. But I'm not going to let the chance that she isn't interested stop me from approaching altogether in the first place.

I know what it's like to have beta, blue pill instincts. If you're anything like me, there's a little voice inside your head that comes up with all sorts of excuses when the moment of truth comes and it's time to approach a new girl. She probably doesn't want to be bothered right now. This isn't the right venue to be hitting on women. She doesn't seem like that kind of girl. Or even worse, you make some kind of prejudicial judgment based on the way she dresses or speaks and tell yourself you don't like girls like her, she isn't your type, blah blah.

Listen to me, it's all nonsense. This is a form of male hamstering. You're rationalizing your approach anxiety, it's as simple as that.

Gentlemen, life is short. If you want something you have to be willing to step outside your comfort zone to get it. Like the saying goes: if you want something, you'll find a way to get it. If you don't, you'll find an excuse for why you can't get it.

In the words of Roosh, MOST WOMEN DO NOT WANT TO SLEEP WITH YOU. Accept it. Get over it. Now start FUCKING finding the women WHO DO want to sleep with you.

Let's say you approach 100 women and 99 of them reject you. Well, it was still worth it, because in the end you got what you wanted; and so did the girl you approach. It's like in sales, are you going to stop making cold calls just because most of the people you're calling are bothered by it? No, of course not, because there are people out there who WANT to buy your product. There are girls out there who WANT your cock. I don't care if you're short, fat, bald, have no game, small dick, whatever the fuck your hang up is, I promise you, there are women out there who are just waiting for a guy like you to approach them.

As men we are expected to make the first move, and despite all the talk of equality in the twenty-first century, this isn't going to change any time soon. As the man, you must take the risk. As the man, you must face rejection.

And also, remember this: as a man, you have the choice of who you will approach and who you will not approach. As a woman, for the most part, you can only choose who you will REJECT and who you will not.

Even Chad Thundercock himself has to make the first move. Chad Thundercock cannot walk into a bar, stand with his back against the wall, beer in hand, looking around awkwardly, not talking to anyone, and then expect to have hot chicks approaching him. Even Chad has to put himself out there, so stop making excuses for why you can't take that risk.

Look, when you approach a woman you want to fuck, there are two possible outcomes: ONE of them involves you getting your dick wet. But if you don't even TRY, then there's only one outcome, and it involves another night with the palm sisters.

Don't be afraid of being a "creep." Don't be afraid of looking like a loser. In short, don't give a flying fuck what other people are going to think when you're approaching women. This is about getting what you want, stop investing your ego in the approaches that you make. So she turned you down like a bitch? It was mean? She insulted you? Boo fucking hoo. Go cry about it like a pussy. The fact is, that rejection was absolutely and utterly meaningless. You're the one investing your ego in the interaction and taking her rejection as a confirmation of your own insecure feelings of inadequacy. You think Chad Thundercock gives two shits when he gets shot down? You don't think CT gets shot down every bit as hard if not harder than other guys? Some chicks are in a bad mood, some chicks are misandrists, some chicks are on an ego trip when they go out, some chicks just aren't horny, some chicks have been burned by guys like CT and would rather do the rejecting than be rejecting... there's a million reasons why she might reject even a top tier guy.

Quit telling yourself that you would approach more if you were a little taller, or once you're more swole, or if you had more money, or whatever the fuck your lame fucking excuse is.

I don't care how low you think your SMV is, while you're sitting at home doing nothing, there are men out there who are BELOW you who are bringing home the girl. They're beating you in the game over and over because you're not even playing. When you don't approach, you've lost before the game even started.

And yeah, the first approach sucks. Yeah, you're probably going to sound like a bumbling idiot until you loosen up a bit and get used to the feeling of talking to strange women. Get over it. There's nothing to be afraid of but your own feelz. Worst case scenario, you get rejected. You had nothing, you lost nothing. Next. It's as simple as that. A rejection is not in any way a reflection of your own SMV. Every guy gets rejected. Fucking celebrities get rejected. There's a million reason a girl might turn you down that don't involve you not being good enough. So quit wasting time wondering why she shot you down and invest that energy into talking to a new girl.

Like Nash says in A Beautiful Mind, your odds of success increase dramatically with each attempt. I promise you, yes you, there are women out there who want to sleep with you. There are women who would love nothing more than fuck your brains out. But they're not going to fall into your lap any time soon, you need to open your fucking mouth and say hello.

Would you even WANT to live in a world where women are the sexually assertive ones? What are you, a bitch? Rather than risk your own feelings, you'd rather sit around waiting for girls to approach you? That's how women think, pussy! As men we are here to chase, to hunt, to conquer, to assert our dominance; to take what we want out of life. And that means it is our job to approach. Making the first move is not a burden, it's a privilege; embrace it. Use it.

Improving yourself doesn't mean shit if you're not actively approaching women. Forget about Tinder, online dating, social media, all this virtual shit. You really think staring at a phone is the best way to meet women? OPEN YOUR FUCKING MOUTH! Laugh, talk, dance, flirt, be a human being. Mating is an organic process, and it was around long before Tinder.

And I don't care if you're in an LTR and/or you have one-itis. Bro, do you even dreadgame? Flirting with other women, even (especially) in front of your girl is not a bad thing. Under the right circumstances, even cheating on a bitch can make her want you more. So stop using your relationship as an excuse to be a goddamned little wuss. APPROACH; make conversation, flirt. If nothing else, you'll have a few leads for when your LTR is over, and you'll be well practiced for single life.

Believe me, anyone who is used to cold approaching strange women will agree with this; it's a use it or lose it kind of skill. I don't care if you're Don Juan or Casanova himself, if you go a few months without so much as flirting with a woman, you're going to find it a challenge to get back into fighting shape. Think of it like fitness; you need to fight to earn it, and then fight to keep it.

TLDR: Never. Stop. Approaching. EVER!

Post Information
Title The Critical Importance of Approaching Attractive Women in Real Life
Author CrackityDiggity
Upvotes 760
Comments 204
Date 26 July 2015 09:18 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
Original Link
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:

[–]someboringdude103 points104 points  (17 children) | Copy

I sell cars for a living. The dude who trained me was a Harvard graduate that specializes in training salesman all over the country. His technique was rather simple. Embrace rejection, rejection is your friend. Every time you get rejected you're close to acceptance. For every no you receive you are one step closer to a yes. That method is applicable to approaching women. Trust me it works. This is precisely how I met my wife. She walks into a party. She's so hot every single Chad in the room doesn't even bother. Me being the carpe diem mother fucker that I am. I say "fuck it" all she can do is say no. Well she didn't. 3 kids later she's as hooked as ever.

[–]Uzinero22 points23 points  (8 children) | Copy

I like the idea of embracing rejection and seeing it as your friend. I really need to start following that more, sometimes I forget that the worst thing that can happen is a "No" in several scenarios and my anxiety gets in the way.

[–]someboringdude21 points22 points  (3 children) | Copy

My trainer told me like this. "Rejection is your ally. You must become immune to it". The best way to become immune to it is to OVER expose your self to it. It's a simple numbers game. For every no you get you are one no closer to a yes.

[–]JayViceroy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not only this but you can lose immunity as well. You need to repeat it and repeat it forever. You can and will get rusty it happens to the best of us.

[–]lifes_a_glitch0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

That's the part I never fully got. I would say I'm immune to rejection just because it's happened so often it becomes part of the routine. So if all approaches are mutually exclusive, how can you be closer to a "yes" after receiving more rejection? SMV doesn't change based on how many women dislike or are uninterested in you.

[–]SupermanSpankedLois2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

If you like that, check out Go For No!. It's about actively choosing rejection as a path to reach your goals.

[–]Uzinero1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Alright, I'll have to check that out, thank you.

[–]tuxedoburrito3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Mark Manson put it in Models really well.

If a woman rejects you its for a reason. Whether on her or (more likely) it's you.

What if that happened in school? Say you get rejected to get into Harvard. They don't want you and don't think you can keep up.

What if Harvard accepted you anyways. You go, can't keep up, go into huge debt, struggle to fit in and eventually just leave empty handed.

That rejection saved you a lot of time energy and money.

[–]FatFuckJay1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take" — Every shooter ever.

[–]Dragodar2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Embrace rejection, rejection is your friend. Every time you get rejected you're close to acceptance. For every no you receive you are one step closer to a yes. That method is applicable to approaching women.

This is so good. Don't think of rejection as a loss and acceptance as a win. Think of rejection as a win and acceptance as an even bigger win!

If you go into an approach with a "win-win, can't lose" mindset, you won't have any nerves because, fuck it who cares. You either win, or you win.

Either she says no, in which case, great. Or she says yes, in which case, awesome.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

rejection is rejection .... being rejected all the time just makes you lower your standards to go get some 5/10 tubby


[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Watch this video. Similar ideas at hand. I linked some videos earlier like these, but some fuckface says just posting motivational videos is crap, despite others seeing it and recognizing it for what it is. One of the speakers in this video is Les Brown. Listen at 2:43. "Everytime someone says 'no', that brings you to another step to a yes". Just an fyi, for those in the States. This Les Brown will be in Orlando in September.

[–]1independentmale1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Embrace rejection, rejection is your friend.

An idea I once read and loved, but haven't put into practice because I've been in an LTR, is to make a game out of it. Aim to get rejected x times in x days. Flirt with women you have no chance with, be bold and unashamed. Try to get rejected for your own amusement if nothing else.

This takes the ego out of it. You assume she's going to say no going into it so you don't have the typical worries or concerns and you don't take the rejection so personally. The benefit is you get a lot of practice talking to women and learning how to handle a rejection gracefully without the emotional investment one typically puts into approaching.

Maybe I'll play the game despite my LTR just for fun. If I do, I'll document my experience and post it.

[–]someboringdude1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

One thing I've learned about being in a ltr, is that it makes game soooooooo much easier. At the end of the day pussy is at home waiting. Therefore getting rejected should be irrelevant.

[–]pepsi190-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Gotta love rejection persistence is key Jay have tighten the game up... and win the dock frame

[–]1DRMMR76287 points288 points  (31 children) | Copy

This may seem nerdy or Beta, but a trick I used to get better at first was pretending I was in an RPG video game. They're not real people. They're characters in the game. In a game you talk to everyone. Some try to kill you, but some give you loot. Who cares what these women think, they're not even real.

Shit, in games there are even dialogue options that aren't available if your Charisma isn't high enough. What do you do? Bitch about it? No, you go level up your fucking Charisma and try again.

[–][deleted] 81 points82 points  (2 children) | Copy

Not nerdy. straight out of mystery's original shit. the club isn't real. It's just a game, it's a simulation, a dream. nothing that happens in the club follows you into real life.

[–]suloco18 points19 points  (1 child) | Copy

Except herpes.

This is truth though. It's not just the club, the whole SMP is a frikkin' game. Taking it as such helps tremendously.

[–][deleted] 43 points44 points  (0 children) | Copy

Whatever it takes mate. If it works for you then more power.

[–]techlibertarian29 points30 points  (1 child) | Copy

I don't care what people call it. If that works for you, fucking do it.

[–]RPmatrix35 points36 points  (2 children) | Copy

but a trick I used to get better at first was pretending I was in an RPG video game.

that's brilliant mate! And we do call iit game after all, coz it is, damn that's a neat way to look at it.

Being the old cunt I am, I've not spent much time playing RPG's but I get where you're coming from and it's TOP advice for the younger guys who can relate to it!

Nice stuff bro



[–]tuxedoburrito0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Side note, I really like seeing your posts and what you add to this sub.

[–]RPmatrix0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

As I do yours too!

thanks very much for mentioning that bro,

It's much appreciated to know I'm being helpful to some degree

cheers bro


[–]TRP VanguardtrpSenator11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

My best pickup comes when I'm trying to help other dudes learn game. When I'm teaching, it's no longer about the girls, so I have absolutely full outcome independence. I don't care if I win or lose, or what she thinks of me. And I fucking slay it.

[–]BinglesTRP8 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy

Not at all. There are people who firmly believe that our entire reality is crafted by our brain. Other people aren't real, existence isn't truly tangible.

I suppose this is almost exactly what you're doing. You're making people into characters in YOUR story. The consequences don't matter.

[–]Bisuboy2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

We could also literally just be a computer simulation.

We are already able to do crazy stuff using computers, just imagine what kind of stuff we will be able to simulate in 100 years.

[–]BinglesTRP5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, I mean, whatever helps achieve that outcome independence, right?

[–]1MajorMid11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

Back in the day it took me like 30 attempts to get Ragnaros to finally drop his pants.

Let's see if I can get a HB9 to drop hers in less.

[–]nomorelulu2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Made me chuckle. I like it. In some ways life is really just a game.

[–]kashkaval22 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Good point about the male hamster. Sick of seeing people on here saying "I'm not approaching because I'm working on myself". That's a cop-out, and you really know you simply don't have the balls to do it, and it's an easy way out. If you're socially awkward, you won't be able to suddenly become smooth with the ladies after you haven't spoken to them for 3-4-5 months. Or thinking "I'll show them after I bulk up/make money". They still won't come crawling like you're thinking. Stop lying to yourselves and get off your computer already.

[–]aussiezman6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

I always view picking up as practice, if I fuck up I work out how to improve and practice again. I read the TAO of Badass books, they go through the pick up techniques step by step. I implement them when I am out on the weekend and it works so well. I can safely say that now whenever I go out it is my choice whether or not I get laid. I find it so easy to get a girl to come home with me that I now have to be more selective. LOVE THIS POWER!!!

[–]Ayoung4u4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

What are he TAO of badass books? I would very much like to read these

[–]aussiezman1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Google the website, the Pick Up techniques follow TRP theory however whilst RP is an ideology, TAO of Badass is a systematic approach to game. Extremely helpful if you want to learn how to go from cold approach->attraction->qualifying->rapport->seduction->relationship.

Learning how to systematically go from one extreme in the process to the other is extremely useful in developing game. Generally if you just increase SMV you might find you gain attraction naturally, with TAO of Badass you can learn tricks to actually trigger attraction.

I follow TRP for my overall sexual strategy, however when I am out at bars or on a 1st Date I follow the TAO of Badass system.

[–]aussiezman0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

there are a few books he has the 2 that I recommend are- 1)The Tao of Badass-Everything You Have To Know-To Be A Complete Badass With Women 2)What to Say by Joshua Pellicer

[–]RPJapan1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

As an RPG lover, that is a great way to think of it.

[–]BlvckGod6660 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You should do a whole post about this. It would be of much value to those with approach anxiety.

[–]1commentatorX0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Not bad... but also a fast-track to awakening you inner serial killer.

[–]AmericanHistoryAFBB-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Take my 200th upvote. Not Beta at all. You're Alpha for having the confidence to share this.

I will be using this one for my inner game, along with "What would Chad do", "Women are Children anyways", etc.

Now, I have some level up "grinding" to do. In more ways than one...

EDIT: Also reminds me of GLO's post "Women are like Pokemon".

[–]THE__USURPER-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

lmao good shit. I have similarly detached from reality to mentally put myself in positions where I felt I had the upper hand to the greatest degree possible. This works, but most people aren't creative enough to do this lol.

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (9 children) | Copy

I rarely comment here, but I've been taking steps in doing exactly what this post says.

The link is to a conversation with a 7/10 the other day. Turns out she had a "boyfriend" (whatever), but her response to me saying that all I had to do was ask her out set me apart from other dudes. In the process of meeting her single friend- 8/10.

She even later stated that guys are too "tenderized" now and lack real life face to face social skills.

Get out there and talk to all women.

[–]RPmatrix10 points11 points  (8 children) | Copy

Thanks for sharing that bro, coz I'd like to point out what I believe is THE most important 'variable' she mentions here "you've got a Good Heart'

too many guys think Alpha = arsehole



[–]truchisoft15 points16 points  (1 child) | Copy

She will hamster good heart for you, notice she said "smart ass" that is arrogant for you

[–]RPmatrix-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy

bro, I'm a smartarse with a good heart! I get all the pussy I want! (usually)


[–]TheKorken 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

good heart = good beta provider

You make her think you are got hearted thats enough. When you dump her she will be like:"I thought you are diffrent" and all this bullshit. Ignore and move on.

[–]RPmatrix0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

good heart = good beta provider

In your opinion No more!

You're entitled to it but In MY Opinion, that's pure BULLSHIT

I guess you're not aware that I'm 48, never married and lost count of the chicks I'd fucked at around 70 something by the time I was 25?

and there's been a couple (of hundred) more since.


[–]TheKorken 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

You fucked those girls with your good heart?

The time someone claims that a mental construct is real I cant take him serious anymore. Your good heart isnt real, just like love and all the other bullshit isnt.

Maybe you fucked enough girls that you want to go back to the bluebill, but dont talk your nonsense in this subreddit then.

[–]RPmatrix-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

You fucked those girls with your good heart?

did I say that? I can't remember doing so!

so where are your experiences being shared here sunshine?

Or is that your standard ad hominem crap?

I bet that hard core dread you dream about playing one day, get you heaps of poosy in your dreams, amirite?

[–]Endorsed ContributorFLFTW16124 points125 points  (21 children) | Copy

But one thing they got absolutely right was the fact that approaching women and closing the deal is a numbers game. The more women you approach, the higher your chances of success.

Men should also get into the habit of approaching other men for the purposes of friendship, gym buddies, and business networking. Most men are incompatible and it might literally take 1,000 dudes before you find one that is long-term-friendship worthy. A long term friendship with the right guy can do wonders for your life, keep you on track to fulfill your goals, and may see 'red flags' that you cannot.

After 2+ years of reading and writing on TRP I think most guys here are actually OK with women. There are new comers who freshly swallowed the pill and need help, but usually those guys were already successful: they had a girlfriend or wife who behaved in a manner that led them to take the red pill. This isn't the neckbeard-virgin-porn-obsessed-live-in-mom's-basement stereotype. Most guys here don't need help or motivation talking to women, but I certainly can't disagree with a helpful reminder such as this post.

Approaching women is good and I agree with OP's post, but I also think that men come to TRP not because we lack women. Actually we've had enough of women--we come to TRP for male camaraderie and friendship. For a pure male space that is not afflicted with post-modern feminist double-speak. We come to hammer away at the illusions constructed around us--to find truth and to compare notes.

One of my goals for the future is to take the lessons I have learned offline--to form a group that is similar to TRP but is conducted in a physical space. I haven't settled yet whether it will be more of a fraternity or more of a mentor program. Just as OP said that flirting and dating can't really be done through online methods (Tinder, dating websites), nor can male friendship or camaraderie be fully appreciated with a mere subreddit. It's time to say "Fuck it, we'll do it LIVE!"

TL;DR: I agree with OP but add that male friendships are more important, because most TRPers already get their dicks wet.

[–]RPmatrix10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy

Men should also get into the habit of approaching other men for the purposes of friendship, gym buddies, and business networking. Most men are incompatible and it might literally take 1,000 dudes before you find one that is long-term-friendship worthy. A long term friendship with the right guy can do wonders for your life, keep you on track to fulfill your goals, and may see 'red flags' that you cannot.

I can't agree more

So many great posts ITT, thank for starting it OP!


fcuk I shoulda crashed 2 hrs ago, wtf! The posts, you're ALL cunts posting such good stuffso late at my night! cunts! (I'm an Aussie don't forget, that word has two diametrically opposed meanings and I'm only using one of them!)

You're a pack of CUNTS! I must've upvoted almost every post here! cunts!

aka "good blokes"

[–]TheDialecticParadox2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah I agree cunt. These cunts are churning out some quality material lately.

[–]RPmatrix0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

yeah, these fucking cunts made me get to sleep at dawn and sleep in till midday! Cunts!


[–]ChadThundercockII0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Zyzz used the word 'cunt' properly. Sick cunt brah.

[–]darkrood8 points9 points  (7 children) | Copy

If your organization had a slight hint of Male-only gathering, prepare for the feminist whiteknight mangina infiltration, feminist picketing, fire-alarm pulling when your group gain enough influence.

Oo..I can almost hear active feminists sounding their war drums....

[–]HoboSomeRye6 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy

You can always cloak it with terms like 'critical thinking', 'complex', 'fast-paced' or 'planning'. (StarCraft, for instance) Something that is not for the immature to keep them out automatically.

[–]darkrood2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

"Critical thinking complex, fast-paced, planning StarCraft convention"

How did I do?

[–]HoboSomeRye2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

slow clap

I'm proud of you T_T

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Add lifting or you won't get what you want.

[–]darkrood0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

So the banner should be "Critical thinking fast-paced complex StarCraft planning lifter convention"

"the latest Zerg rush is not intense enough, you can only take down a base 3 second more than regular rush"

"Uh, if you don't mix your cardio into your workout, your endurance will suffer"

That sounds like a convention I will pay to go to, seriously. :)

I honestly can't think of a girl who play StarCraft and lift. That's like a rare breed.

[–]HoboSomeRye0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Give them time. They are slow to evolve.

[–]Ovadox3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This deserves a stand alone post.

[–]Nebulose111 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is my biggest issue: No male friends due to moving.

Guys at work are all right but most are bitches who suck up to every female around or are chain bound to their wife/girl after 5pm weekdays and weekends.

[–]vpwnz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sign me up for the program

[–]hebola4lyfe0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Men should also get into the habit of approaching other men for the purposes of friendship, gym buddies, and business networking. Most men are incompatible and it might literally take 1,000 dudes before you find one that is long-term-friendship worthy. A long term friendship with the right guy can do wonders for your life, keep you on track to fulfill your goals, and may see 'red flags' that you cannot.

I could not agree more ! I wish a lot of guys realized this . It's really hard for me to make trustworthy male friends . Most of the guys I'm friends with are homophobes and always keep a distance from me . I want to discuss about business ideas and the market with them but its always about mundane shit and fun recreational topics .

[–]dontaddmuch-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

The Red Pill is a place to discuss the philosophy on how to become a great male. Yet nothing could replace having someone else to help motivate you on your journey to greatness. These are the type of men we need to seek and surround ourselves with. They may not be many but just like you, they're out there. As for women; a real LTR is a women who can take a step back and see this same reality as we do. Only thing is she better be hot. You will never find a Unicorn by not looking. Approach everyone.

[–][deleted] 77 points78 points  (45 children) | Copy

Agree totally OP. I find some TRP members will hide behind 'monk mode' to avoid interaction, especially with women. Exposure is key to everything, including approaching.

Raising your SMV high enough will result in a few lucky pulls from women who may approach you, or from your weak game, but it will not give you the opportunity to spin multiple plates and be the guy who can consistently bed new women.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

The thing is a womans first move is totally different from a guys first move. A strong and overt IOI is the female equivalent of the first move.

[–]tnorth2313 points14 points  (42 children) | Copy

How often do guys with really good looks/high SMV get approached first?

I read somewhere that they don't get approached at all because they intimidate women. All the women do is give them a look so they know to approach.

[–]TRP VanguardVZPurp31 points32 points  (7 children) | Copy

Women tend to rely on the indirect approach. Instead of opening you directly, they'll position themselves to encounter you or have some other reason for talking to you (e.g. situational question). During the day that seems to be most common for me.

At night things can be more direct or carry sexual undertones right off the bat.

[–]Senior Contributorcocaine_face4 points5 points  (6 children) | Copy

Yep, even a simple line like, "Can you watch my laptop while I go to the bathroom?" at Starbucks can usually be an opener from a girl, especially if you guys have been stealing glances between each other.

[–]TomDemian 46 points46 points [recovered] | Copy

"Can you watch my laptop while I go to the bathroom?"

Agree and amplify by stealing the laptop, girls love a bad boy

[–]Senior Contributorcocaine_face24 points25 points  (0 children) | Copy

And then pee on it. Remember, girls like dominant men.

[–]Upvote_To_The_Left5 points6 points  (6 children) | Copy

Not often, but that also depends on your lifestyle. A fashion photographer will have women initiating much more than an IT guy, simply due to his career. And an all star quarter back likely gets more ass than both of them combined.

But generally guys dont get approached. Hence you have to do it yourself.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points | Copy

[permanently deleted]

[–]Senior Contributorcocaine_face8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

If you're in CS/IT, don't use your career to get laid.

Or start a company as a hobby and then you're an, "entrepreneur" which is far sexier to women.

[–]vpwnz0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Interesting - totally diff experience on this end. I was in vegas with a guy who works in our IT company and he was fighting off women with a stick. Yes, he's a coder. Yes, it was a large stick - never seen anything like it.

(might have something to do with the fact he rolled up in an Aventador, but how'd they know?)

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, IT is pretty unsexy. Those of us in the know recognize not to play it up. The advice to mask your profession is doubly true for IT guys.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (7 children) | Copy

They don't. It happens occasionally in a club environment, but outside of that I have never heard of it happening. Women will try give off noticeable tells but that is about it.

[–]widec4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

I get approached maybe one or two times a year, and my smv isn't that high. The caveeat is the girls are never too attractive. If I want a hot girl, I need to make the first move.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I get approached all time at special events working security. Girls flirt all the time, but fucking suck at it. All they do is set themself up to be available, and expect you to take the lead.

[–]septic_sergeant1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Can agree here. Bar bouncer at a really rough night club. I get approached 5-10 times a night. I have had women force their hands down my pants even. And if I fuck someone up that night, the number of women who approach me doubles.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

so what youre saying to these PUA's on this reddit is to get a job in a bar and get approached instead of running around a shopping mall approaching girls with some canned lines.....

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeeeeeeep. Ass grabs all around.

[–]Poldonis3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

I get approached a few times a year, a lot of it has to do with peacocking though. No fedora shit, but as a frat guy I will wear 6 inch seam shorts. With confidence and not missing leg day, girls come up. Also for holidays or events, I am usually in something ridiculous. You have to have confidence with it though, ANY awkwardness or lack of owning it , you just look like a fucking wierdo

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I rock a stache and aviators for shits and gigs. Its all about the idgaf attitude.

[–]mrmeyhemn3 points4 points  (8 children) | Copy

women don't approach men with good looks because they find good looking men intimidating. this is true, the majority of women i've dated over my lifetime have told me that they would never have approached me because i was "too good looking" and they found it intimidating.

i've also heard this from women at bars/strip clubs, when they do approach they do so to men they think they can control. they go for the "easy marks".

if your smv is high due to good lucks (genetic lottery), expect to have to put in just as much if not more work than the average guy and have to "prove" that you are not a "player" (which is really what they want, they'd rather share an alpha than have a beta all to themselves).

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (6 children) | Copy

wtf are you talking about....good looking guys dont need to try at all....

[–]mrmeyhemn0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

i didn't say i didn't have to try. i said they find good looking guys intimidating.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy

good looking guys can pick and choose who they want to pump and dump ....

[–]mrmeyhemn-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

right, i pick and choose who i want to pump and dump.

that don't mean you don't have to "try". you still have to get past their ASD and they DO still attempt to shit test.

oooh, i get it. you're another one of those pink haired hamplanet feminists that comes over here to troll. guess what uggo, no one here cares what you think. now go back to eating your bucket of ice cream and rageing about all that dick you can't get from good looking guys like myself.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

should i spend $3,000 on a RSD boot camp? since pua is real?

[–]mrmeyhemn-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

i never said that. you are obviously retarded.

edit: i don't subscribe to pua/rsd, you don't need it when you're top 20% for looks and top 6% intelligence.

cry more.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

20% for looks and top 6% intelligence.

I assume you are neither peasant

[–]Olipyr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

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[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

All the women do is give them a look so they know to approach.

Realizing this has been the biggest struggle for me in the moment. It always strikes me after the fact. Prime example is when a buddy of mine turned 21. I promised him beforehand I'd take him out for his birthday and afterward developed a condition that doesn't allow me to drink (Which makes all of this harder. ever try offering a girl a drink when you aren't drinking? It comes across as rapey as it sounds. I pretty much don't do clubs anymore.). The shot girl at the club (solid 9; as the position entails) kept throwing me looks. Drunk, disinhibited me might have caught it. Sober me missed the cue. I wasn't paying her any extra attention and she wasn't work-flirting because she never came over to sell us shots, but persistently throughout the night threw me glances but I was busy babysitting my young, drunk friend who had overdone it. I wanted to punch myself in the dick when I recognized the wasted opportunity. I can pick up on verbal cues and body language once the conversation starts, but I constantly miss the look aka "fuck me eyes."

[–]DuncanMonroe6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

Dude, she was a shot girl. "Work flirting" isn't something they can really turn on and off, they're conditioned to be that way. Don't be that guy who thinks the waitress at hooters really wants his dick.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Dude, she was a shot girl. "Work flirting" isn't something they can really turn on and off

This is why I don't do strip clubs, or Hooters, or Twin Peaks etc. I don't get anything out of someone flirting with me for money. Maybe I misread it, maybe I didn't. I said at the top and bottom I suck at properly identifying this particular IOI. In either case I lost nothing (except possible opportunity) since I didn't act on it. I wouldn't have bought anything from her anyway since I can't drink.

[–]laere0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A lot of people forget that monk mode doesn't mean cutting out social interaction 100%. It's used to work on things exactly as such, instead of using your time watching porn and playing video games.

[–]throwaway-aa219 points20 points  (2 children) | Copy

It's post like this that new people need to hear. I've been lifting for almost a year.... trust me, it won't happen for you just because you lift, make money and dress well (and even go out at night). You won't spin plates like that. You NEED to approach. It has always and always will be on the man. The only way you're getting consistently approached is if you have really high SMV and all that means is you're still limited by the type of women who would even have the balls to approach anyway.

[–]voomer53[🍰] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Even if she approaches you you'll soon be getting shit tests because the woman won't ever really take you seriously as you basically blew it from the get-go by not approaching her first.

[–]GooseJuice-xo 49 points49 points [recovered] | Copy

It must be funny being called Chad and reading all the posts on this sub.

[–]chadeusmaximus27 points28 points  (0 children) | Copy

For me it is. Seems like overnight the whole chad thundercock thing happened, and nobody told me when or where it started.

Fine with me though. Seems word is getting out.

[–]Mymindismia13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

Especially if you're a huge beta

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (3 children) | Copy

If you're afraid of looking like a creep, you're already a creep. And that creepiness won't go away until you've approached enough sets where you stop giving a shit.

[–]StManTiS2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Being a creep exists only if you can't read her. You can start a conversation over ANY object or event in the environment. If she responds back in an open way she wants to talk. If she true to close the thread that is your cue to walk away. If you keep pushing then you're a creep.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Creepiness can exist long before you even say a word to her. Creepiness is a cross between being too serious (from fear) and overly sexual (from desperation). Both of which are solved by multiple approaches.

[–]jewishclaw-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't disagree, but women are kind of like horses, skittish as fuck and dumb as a box of rocks. I've seen girls go from tingles to eww creep and vice versa in an instant. The best cryptonite for creepiness imo is opening every set in the room. If you open her then walk away, she'll go from, "uhhh, why are talking to me..." to "wait where did you go, why are you talking to her now..." in t-dot zero seconds. Try to make sure the hot girl in the next set is as attractive or more than the one you are walking away from. Also, I know a lot of rp'ers frown on female friends, but there are no creepy guys that have a girl hanging off them.

[–]thor_away9246 points47 points  (5 children) | Copy

you come up with excuses not to approach. This is you hamstering approach anxiety

I know i know...I'll start....tomorrow...

[–]psycho-logical42 points43 points  (3 children) | Copy

Yesterday you said tomorrow... JUST DO IT!

[–]Uzinero12 points13 points  (2 children) | Copy


[–]Dragodar10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]suloco1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"Sometime is ,even for a dream, too long ago" -Wolfsheim

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

When you're more invested in other peoples' opinions of you than your own, that's when you start to fear rejection. Think about it this way - you're losing frame in the hardest way possible.

If I walk up to a girl and she rejects me, so fucking what? I'm a fucking badass and I have shit going for me. I don't want to be in the company of a broad so dumb that she doesn't see what a fucking catch I am for longer than it takes her to reject me. Because my time is valuable and I am valuable and I don't give a damn if other people are too fucking retarded to see it.

Do I have some things to work on? Always. I'm not saying I'm perfect. But I am great and I'm not going to sell myself short by worrying about other peoples' perceptions. If you find a girl attractive, approach the shit out of her. Because you're doing both yourself and her a disservice by not giving yourself what you want, and by not giving her a chance to meet a guy like you.

The average guy out here is so fucking retarded. So you approach that bitch and you display your value. You sell yourself and if she doesn't want you, fuck her, someone else does.

[–]DalekJay24 points25 points  (0 children) | Copy

JUST DO IT! - Sorry couldn't resist

You are right... And after the pill I was afraid and hamstering my attitudes,then I tried, worked and I didn't die

[–]GuitarHero0710 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

My observation is that you can attract considerably hotter women in the real world. Attractive women may literally have hundreds of guys hitting them up through Tinder, OKC, Match, FB, Instagram etc. However, it's rare for a man to approach them with confidence. That instantly sets you apart.

Online, you are nothing more than some lines of text and a few pixels on a screen. Even the best online profile doesn't compare to meeting someone in the flesh. As Tyler said, approaching women is your best leverage point to actually bedding beautiful women.

[–]Grifter326 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

I kill it on Tinder where I can lay out the ground work without any pressure.

When it comes to cold approaching I'm a fucking train wreck. My frame goes to shit. I worry if I'm going to get shut down to the point that my face turns red, and I feel like I could almost pass out. I need to go hang out with someone that'll make me go talk to women.

[–]PenInACup1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Try to become friends with a group of alpha men or men who know their way around cold approach. You will pick up traits from people who hangout with.

[–]LuvBeer14 points15 points  (9 children) | Copy

Great great post. Seems to me that pickup is fetishized and talked about now to the extent that people know the lingo without doing any field work. Field work teaches you lessons that no amount of reading or watching videos will. Most importantly, it forces you to stop taking yourself so seriously.

The 1% control the vast majority of the world's resources, perhaps you can't do much about that. But there's a 99% you don't have to belong to--the 99% that live mostly vicariously through tv, who measure worth by the facebook like. I feel that the future will make this separation of the socially adept and the socially inept even more sharp. Grow a pair. Get rejected a few times. Laugh at yourself. Learn something.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy

I deleted my facebook. Don't give a fuck what other people do. Made an instagram, only post things of cool shit I do.

[–]LuvBeer1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

how do you deal with the reactions, particularly from younger people? I used to not have fb and people assumed I was hiding something.

[–]RedHeimdall1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Too cool for school: "Facebook is gay. Once my grandma signed up, I lost interest."

[–]LuvBeer0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Haha good rebuttal, but then are you guys on IG?

[–]RedHeimdall0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm on no social media right now... but once I get myself looking good like I want to in pics, I think I'll at least throw up a few pics on FB, IG, & Tinder.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I tell them that I don't care what other people are doing with their lives, because I genuinely don't care.

[–]jewishclaw0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Not to sound like a trendy cunt, but for reals, young people don't use fb. I don't know anyone under 25 that uses it. They may have an account, may even have the messenger app, but they don't use it. FB morphed into a place for middle-aged women to share pictures of their kids and be passive aggressive to their frenemies.

[–]Nebulose115 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

About to hit my first club after basic training and my buddy drops something on me I will never forget:

"Let's go in here and get the noes out of the way so we can find the yeses."

[–]CrackityDiggity[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Spot on. Sounds like you got a solid wingman.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Would you even WANT to live in a world where women are the sexually assertive ones? What are you, a bitch?

That made me laugh and hit way too close to home.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

OP is right. I'm reading TRP for more than 1.5years now. Before that I followed PUA literature. If this sub had an theory exam, I would excel with A+. But I'm still struggling to reduce 10pounds for past few years. Still procrastinate my work. I still scored few girls but that's not even 10% of my capacity. Practise is hundred times better than theory.

[–]CrackityDiggity[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

Indeed. You can read all the books on driving you want--until you get behind the wheel, you don't know how to drive.

[–]aussiezman2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

All newbies should read this post!! Handbook worthy!

[–]redassfuck2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Just went to a big music festival, cold approached 2 or 3 individual people and 2 or 3 groups of 3-8 people over the weekend. only a few were unfriendly and most were totally into talking. got a few numbers that girls gave to me without me asking. Being friendly and fun and not shy can not be understated also the right settings can make it much easier.

My worst cold approach was in a club walked up to a girl and said hi and she called me an asshole so me being drunk called her a cunt, she then threw her drink in my face! I started laughing at the absurdity of the situation while trying to wipe the burning alcohol out of my eyes. bouncers came and Hauled me out while I couldn't see. I was with my buddy and he saw it all go down so he comes out and I'm still trying to fix my eyes for like 5 minutes and guess what they let me back in after my friend explained what happend to the bouncer and we proceed to keep talking to girls.  Even if you crash and burn you just gotta laugh cause there's always more girls. What are the chances the next girl will throw her drink in your face? Haha didn't call anyone else a cunt after that. 

[–]franklyforthright1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Frame break. Solution: agree and applify

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

Fucking awesome post! Can't say enough about the abundance mentality. I'm very much into game theory and how it applies to social dynamics. Really appreciate your post and absolutely agree that making that first move is essential in attaining what you want in life.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy

let me're a RSD Tyler fanboy.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

I actually have never heard of him. But I will check it out now. Thanks! Why the hostility?

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

because RSD/ PUA is a scam

[–]MrStinky1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

For all the dudes out there who still have approach anxiety, here is a free program that includes a couple months of daily activities to slowly and progressively beat approach anxiety

[–]swedsson1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The only thing stopping most of us from doing what we want, or what we know we should do is fear. The fear of not succeeding, the fear of being rejected. I've read and heard countless times that you should USE your fear. But how? What does that even mean? I didn't have an answer for this it wasn't obvious to me how you "channel" your fear into something productive. The answer for me however, is to realize how much you FEAR to be alone the rest of your life, to stay a complete idiot around women, to never get a job you can go to with pride, the fear of not changing for the better, not improving myself. That's what I'm really afraid of.

[–]Upvote_To_The_Left1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

So god damn spot in.

You need to be approaching women constantly. If youre not, then your just a bitter dude who talks with other bitter dudes online about how the world is unfair.

It takes balls to talk to women on the street everyday. Thats the kind of life you need to accept if you ever want to have a women you consider a 9 or 10 on your arm.

[–]-Awake-1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is the best and most comprehensive thing I've ever read about cold approaching. Fitting that I just deleted my online dating apps yesterday to make myself get out in set more

[–]redestofthereds1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

"But-but I can't! I have bit of a belly"Damn hamster is getting the best of me.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

When men chase their dreams, women follow. Sex is not everything - fulfillment is.

[–]1commentatorX1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nailed it. Cold approach comfort is a foundation. A guy could be absolutely killing it on hook-up apps and dating sites (and good for him) but he might not be owning his full pulling potential. Also, those (disconnected/indirect) means often tend to lack quality returns. I see it like this:

You might be able to get takeout food anytime you like - but the worlds best restaurant doesn't deliver.

[–]FACEisEVERYTHING4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy

"Even Chad Thundercock himself has to make the first move. Chad Thundercock cannot walk into a bar, stand with his back against the wall, beer in hand, looking around awkwardly, not talking to anyone, and then expect to have hot chicks approaching him."

false. i was at the bar last night and my sister and one of her friends approached a guy who looked like thor. there are plenty of girls approaching guys it may not be the norm but when your CT hot women will find a subtle way to approach you. they are also more forgiving of your errors.

"there's a million reasons why she might reject even a top tier guy." this is just pure coping. No mentally sane woman would reject a top tier guy under circumstance. THEY are ones getting rejected since women are a dime a dozen to top tier men.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Not sure why you are getting downvoted. What you say is patently true.

Women throw themselves at top tier men.

Do you think Brett Favre or Michael Phelps ever had to cold approach girls to get the hottest tail in the room? Never.

What OP SHOULD have said is while top tier men don't have to approach women to get laid, the other 95% of men do.

[–]ryno550 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You'd be surprised, there is that Jets chick that Favre got flack for hitting on in a strange fashion. And she is smokin.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thats actually an excellent counter point. I shouldn't have said, "never".

[–]froggyfreshrap-2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

U really think that Brad Pitt would't get rejected if he wasn't famous? Doesn't matter how good looking you are, you will get rejected. Girls have a shit ton of reasons to reject someone.

[–]FACEisEVERYTHING-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

yea no shit. The point is he would have the luxury of attracting the largest number of women because hes handsome.

[–]OscarWhisky3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Great post. The whole idea is to screen women and get to the ones who matter.

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

None matter, they're here for our amusement, something to do when we're not building our oun lives. They come and go so easily, they're not worth much effort, not worth investing in them because you're never going to get a return on that investment. They don't matter. We might matter, if we build our lives well.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Contrary to what they might say, approaching a random woman on the street is not harassment and never will be

Even if it was, do it anyways just to piss her off.

[–]RPmatrix0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Great Thread OP, I couldn't agree more!

I just posted a huge post (like yours) about how I'd game women in bars ,, Hundreds of them I took home too ... if anyone's interested I'll repost it here

I've gotta get some sleep


[–]DuncanMonroe2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Please do. I have never struggled to get women (been with maybe 30 so not a virgin but could be more successful) but I've never actually gone out and tried, either - I've mostly just gotten lucky, benefitted from circumstances that were beyond my control, etc. I've never done the bar game and never fucked a girl I met at a bar or a club. My main issue is that in bars, any woman worth fucking is already going to have dudes all over her, trying to fuck her, or at least one guy aggressively chatting her up. Few of them are alone, which makes things weird. I don't want to give a woman the satisfaction of letting her bask in men "fighting " over her in that annoying, faux-subtle way.

[–]RPmatrix6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

here you go,I hope it gives you some ideas bro, it's from this thread here on TRP

  • Approaching challenging sets (mixed groups, underage, girls with parents, girls on subway / bikes etc)

    This is my reply to a guy asking advice on cold approaching various situations:

You sound like you've got it well sorted, the only one I'd be happy to have a go at would be

If she is in a set with another guy AT ALL 

IME it's actually easier when there's a guy there, as you go an 'pal up' with him, which is easy (as long as he's not gay and horny) and once you're getting on with him he'll most likely let you know 'what's what' and 'who's with whom' if you inquire in the right way

One of my favorite methods when I was your age, or a bit younger ~23-25 (I'm 48) was to go to a bar I knew which had pool tables in the bar and a big room where live bands played until 2am

I'd rock up ~6-7pm and have a few games of pool with however would play with me, although it's usually what we call "challenge tables" down here In Oz, where the winner/s "hold the table" until beaten, and you join in by putting your money on the side of the table in a queue and waiting to have a go, and lots of girls play pool (usually not very well, but that's where you come in of you're any good by offering to 'partner up' with them to play 'doubles' (2 people on each side who take turns) In the meantime you shoot the shit with the other random people playing pool and have a few beers.

Then as the HB's begin to come in to see the bands, I'd cruise the room every half an hour or so (or between games) and suss out which ones I'd try hitting on. I'd usually select 3-4 of the hottest girls I liked the look of ... Nothing under a HB7 and usually the top 3-4 there; and here's the Game part.

Come around 9pm the room is full of people but the bands are still setting up (they begin to play ~10pm) and so I'd 'casually appear' beside a HB I'd singled out and go stand beside her BUT not 'directly' i.e I'd have my back half turned to her but I could still see her head move, and when it moved to look at me, I'd casually say something noncommittal, e.g. "any idea who's playing first?" or tell her one of a few jokes i know almost always get a laugh, and then maybe we'd talk for a few mins (2-3, no more) and I'd wait for a pause when she looks away somewhere and I'd just fade away without saying a word.

btw, I'd never introduce myself until round 2 or 3, stay enigmatic and she'll stay curious!

Rinse and repeat with all 4 which will take ~an hour, and then return to the first girl and do pretty much the same thing as I did originally but now that we've met, I can start talking about almost anything as long as she finds it interesting enough to reply ... I'll give her ~5mins this time and then just fade away into the crowd again to the next girl and so on.

By the time I've been doing this for a few hours I've probably talked to each of the 3-4 girls I'm interested in a couple of times, as well as a bunch of other randoms as I wander about

Think about it. odds on None of these girls know each other or the 'randoms' they see me talking to but you can be sure they've noticed, esp if they've already given me an IOI or two!

I rarely had a night I didn't take one of the girls home that I'd been hitting on from the start, or sometimes with an even hotter babe who'd come later, and occaisionally two (and they'd also cum later too!)

I did this 3-5days a week for about 4yrs, I lost count around 70 something when I was about 25!

One thing that surprised me was how many HB8+'s were starfish in bed! It was almost like they expected a guy to do all the work, so after about a year, I was only fucking ~7/10 of the girls I'd get into my bed naked as I just wasn't interested in teaching some chick how to fuck OR spending the effort to "have a wank in her cunt" so to speak.

OTOH, I've had my cock and mind blown by some demurely attired babe who almost looked as if they were so innocent they might be virgins

Nup! Not even close.

Another thing I learned during this stage of my life (chicks go all gooey in the head after being sexed well) and for the next half an hour, while they're in "post coital bliss" they'll often answer questions I asked with surprising honesty!

That's how I learned that most HB's have "sold sex" to guys, in various ways, from escorts to high class brothels (which are totally legal downunder, as is street prostitution, none of that US crap busting the guys etc!) as well as how many had been 'sexually abused' in one way or another as a child! Man I heard some crazy stories you couldn't make up!

IME the truth is definitely stranger than fiction!

e.g I've had LTR's with 2 girls who have been kidnapped! And too many had been raped at some stage, as well as a bunch with "eating" (control) disorders!~and I'd be the first person they'd ever told! Great! not!

Anyway, this technique still works for me, although I've refined a few aspects to suit my older age.

I hear NY has lots of cool little bars and clubs that might fit a similar style of Game, so that's my recommendation for you and your mate to do.

Also, having a wingwoman who will cold approach a girl for you and "word her up about "this amazing guy I know" ,, who then "coincidentally" just happens to appear out of nowhere, and your WW goes apeshit on you = instant female validation, but she knows she only stays to see the conversation with me and my 'target' going ok before she fades without a word leaving me to sink or swim! ;D

The thing is, as one of my best WW once explained to me, "people are "homo-emotional" so it follows that it's easier for a guy to cold approach a guy just as it's easy for an attractive girl to approach a girl, which is why I suggested when hitting on 'sets' with (esp) just one guy, you first talk with him, and if you find him to be reasonably cool, the more likely the females with him are also similar in their 'relative female mindset" --- and IF there are two guys and two of you, 'single one guy out' each and then combine your conversations, preferably one that involves much humor and laughs and the girls will tend to come all by themselves as they don't want to "miss out on All the Fun" we seem to be having!

As for young girls, I had a 19yo german gf for about a year, when I was 41, and the biggest issue was all the jealousy I received esp from guys who would TRY to play the 'pervert card' with me.

I'd just laugh and so would she! We had a great time until she went back home! (fuck I can't believe that was 7yrs ago!)

She even came back to Oz the next yr with her mum for 3 mths who I met then! That wasn't a problem at all! She gave me a BJ on the roof of Sydney's highest building, which AFAIK only me and a mate have done!

In fact I spoke to her two nights ago as we still call each other a couple of times a year. She told me she's just bought a big house! Cool (she's now a successful geographer involved in 'water management')

TL:DR: Find a pub with pool tables and live bands, and read the post!

I hope that helps a bit bro, it's all I've got for now!

all the best amigo


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Great post! This is the next step for me. I have so many women to sleep with from dating sites. It was easy and fun but I know the next step up, the most beautiful of women, are easier to find in real cold approach.

[–]nomorelulu0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I needed this. This is the next step for me and my development as a man.

[–]redestofthereds0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Watching VitalyzedTv on YouTube is pretty effective, I think.

[–]Profdiddy0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Is this not an imperative? OP I don't disagree but perhaps this should be written in a different voice.

[–]AmericanHistoryAFBB0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Great post! I agree. Fuck online dating, fuck tinder. Real life is where it's at. It's much more rewarding nailing a woman you met offline.

I went to a wedding yesterday, and I was sure to flirt with anyone who gave me IOI's (indicators of interest). Even a 43 year old women (i'm 23). Nothing came of it, was cock blocked all day, but good practice.

[–]unicornh_10 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

"if you fight to earn it, then you fight to keep it" classic...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I promise you, there are women out there who are just waiting for a guy like you to approach them.

This, but they just don't know it until you've approached them and started pumping out some game.

Good post though OP!

[–]Noveno0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I need this text, with a nice voice acting (Morgan Freemar or sthing) to listen every morning.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

By the way. Because of this post, I think I have found my newest hobby. Studying the fuck out of evolutionary game theory. Look it up. Interesting stuff and how it could be applied to social dynamics. From a numbers perspective. Mathematically at least, I think assholeness or whatever you wanna call it and assertive if not aggressive behavior wins vs anything else. When I same game theory, "game" is not to be confused with the practice of game. More along the lines of competition. What strategy works best. Yet, they can all be used together to formulate a winning angle. Thanks again guys! This website has truly changed my perspective on things. Not just women, but in life.

[–]ericatx0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That little negative voice starts talking the second I start to approach a woman. KIlls me everytime. Thanks for the motivation.

[–]redpillsoldato0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is a great fucking post. So great that I feel shitty reading it. I mean it just hits right on the fucking mark. Looks aren't an issue and I have a pretty solid sense of style. I do fine with women who I've known and befriended for some time, but as far as randomly making shit happen with hot strangers, ahhhhh this guy is a novice.

[–]imthemanyesiam0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Any go to openers or questions to ask the girl?

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Hi, what time do you get off work? You should come by my place tonight.

Say it with a sly grin, then don't say anything else until she replies.

[–]cardalejon3s 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy

I personally think it's easier to live in the moment and not plan anything.

Notice something about her, what's going on, etc. and come up with something witty - doesn't even have to be directed at her. It's easier with practice and the closer she is to your social circles.

Then interpret her response (read: body language). You can tell if a girl wants you even before you go up by reading how she reacts to you.

[–]RPmatrix1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I personally think it's easier to live in the moment and not plan anything.

I agree, I pretty much always wing it ....Practice makes better and all that, Plus, as Bro Vengeful suggested, cold approaching Men is a very good way to practice small talk as there's no sexual pressure etc to get it right.

Which is why hitting on a 'set' that has a guy in it can be easier than a solely female set IME

Notice something about her, what's going on, etc. and come up with something witty - doesn't even have to be directed at her. It's easier with practice and the closer she is to your social circles.

I usually prefer to keep my 'opening comment' to a girl to be NOT related to her, the more casually confident you can appear, sort of ''meh, NBD" on that first approach, especially to a HB7+ avoids the chance her hamster seeing you 'pedastalizing' her, (which, odds on, will NOT help at all, duh!) if you get my drift, and it also sets her 'first impression' to 'hmmm he's kinda strange/confident/mysterious but friendly, I don't get it?',, type thing going on in her head, if I can, which also allows me to come back and say almost anything and she wont be surprised, in fact, played well, she'll almost expect it, which is exactly what I'm aiming for

That said, in my 'day Game' some of my best approach lines are "Hi my names matrix, what's yours?" (confident) or "I just had to come up and say G'day" (flattery ... will get you far in the right circumstances) or (and I often just do this for fun, to amuse myself) when I'm on public transport and there's some cuty I can sit near/beside, (and odds on she's looking at her ph) I might just make a straight out comment to her, (similar to the pub but not the same) i.e. as I know she can see me looking at her ph, and I'll simply say "whatcha listening to?" or I might comment on her clothes, e.g "I love chicks who wear Doc Marten's" etc ... which tends to spin their heads as half the time I'm dressed as a tradie, but what's coming out of my mouth is more suited to a guy wearing a suit, and IME/O,, chicks are like curious cats chasing the lazer spot coz they don't understand it.

Girls usually have pretty good bullshit detectors, but as they're often 'natural liars' there's this weird "mutual respect" thing that can happen where she's actually impressed with my bullshit! lol, no wonder I usually find it fun!

I guess you'd call it "breaking the ice" but a few sundays back I was heading into the city ("downtown" for you yanks) on a tram, and I was 'in the Zone' and in the 30mins it took, I approached 3 separate babes, one after the other, as one got off the tram I went to the next.

I was in a 'amused mood' so I was being a 'funny smartarse' and I'm fairly confident I could've pulled any of these babes (all ~7-8's) had I not had other things to do. The last one I had to stop chatting to as i had to get off

btw I was going to my workplace to catch up with my partner and ... do some work tidying up our warehouse, I couldn't take a detour with any of these girls, as the work had to be done. Such is life.

The point I'm making, or trying to, is that 'cold approaching' can be done anywhere with a variation on this theme IME

Note: I LOVE smoking pot, but I'll NEVER go out stoned, coz it's "game over" before it even began as you need to stay sharp to "act aloof" ... (unless you're offering a fellow HB female stoner a choof, then it might work)

I've actually got a pretty funny story about doing this at the end of the night, with very unexpected results!

cheers bros


edits: repairing my fuck ups

[–]jx2340 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How can you overthink this so much?

Best pussy is the pussy of hot girls > Need to talk to girls to fuck them > Talk to hot girls.

[–][deleted] -4 points-4 points | Copy

[permanently deleted]

[–]Myrpl0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you're at a level where women approach you first I don't even know why you would even need to be advised on approaching, so there's that.

[–]hb8only -2 points-2 points [recovered] | Copy

a few of my friends are Chads.. they literally walk into a bar, stand with their backs against the wall, beers in hands, looking around AND hot girls are going aroud them and EYEFUCKING them and SMILING!!! you are poor as me because we havn't experienced this in our lives but ou boy, it is real as it sounds.. I saw a girl came to my friend and literally said I just want to tell you, you are really handsome man

Even Chad Thundercock himself has to make the first move. Chad Thundercock cannot walk into a bar, stand with his back against the wall, beer in hand, looking around awkwardly, not talking to anyone, and then expect to have hot chicks approaching him. Even Chad has to put himself out there, so stop making excuses for why you can't take that risk.

[–]RPmatrix1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

you're totally missing the point the OP is making mate

that's why you're being downvoted, and I did too coz you're being a picky little twat trying to take a single point from a massive VERY good post and attempt to 'prove' it

Howz your game going sunshine? Have you even got any?


[–]ThePermanentGuest-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'll catch heat for this, but I'll say it anyway:

This is nonsense. The RedPill, which is essentially enlightenment of true masculinity that has been covered by society, was hardly born out of a bunch of narcissistic validation junkies from the PUA scene. Sure, there's overlap, but those who move from PUA tend to take the knowledge and move towards a more level-headed arena.

As for the discipline, I honestly don't see the point of approaching for sex. For what, exactly? You should be approaching people (men and women) on an everyday basis to add value to their lives, not to treat them merely as a means to your own end. If you get in the habit of approaching people casually, it becomes easier for you, allowing whatever you desire to occur as a natural byproduct.

[–]justgotalpha-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

this is a very good article ,i personally have a friend who approaches anything that moves 9 out 10 times he gets rejected and believe me he seems not to care but i totally agree i am a living proof of that the more women you approach the higher the chances of finding a girlfriend,fuck buddy,plate etc

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Banged 30 girls in the 3 years since I found TRP and NoFap. 90% Tinder and OkCupid.

Currently in an LTR that is set to expire soon (she's moving).

I'm feeling it's time to go my own way for a while.

Thailand, Nepal, and India this winter.

So glad I can leave this PUA crap in the dust for a while, if not forever.

[–]neutralstrike-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Honestly, this is the best statement I've read on this forum. You didn't have to share this but in the end just want to help out all the people looking to break free. A selfless act. But mostly brilliantly put together.

[–]RedLeaderFlyingBy-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

The original book from 60 Years Of Challenge, which I'm sure you can find with a great Google search, has this exact same philosophy embedded throughout.

Nothing beats real world experience. Nothing.

Great post.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

so if youre ugly and you approach 100 girls and get rejected by them all whats the point?

if i look like Yad or tom torrero ...maybe i can talk to girls but im still whats the point of becoming a "rejection artist"

getting rejected does not make you any better than a guy who rarely approaches women... when will you keyboard jockeys learn this.... whats it matter just focus on something else like your hobbies

[–]NotRAClST2-5 points-4 points  (5 children) | Copy

Lifting is worthless. Get good at a specific sport or martial arts, it develops fascia which is more important than aesthetically looking muscles

[–]DuncanMonroe4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Who the hell told to this? Do you even know what fascia is?

[–]NotRAClST21 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

yah. you get fascia through repetitive action of a specific sport. proper stretching and massages allow it to grow throughout your body. becomes watery webbing, makes you stronger without needing bulky muscles. Just look at basketball players.

[–]ExiledNihilist0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You're missing the point of lifting. It's not just for the muscles, it's for the mentality.

[–]FredBorden-3 points-2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Agreed with most parts but what if I really don't want to approach the bitchy ones?

I remember when I first joined Facebook I kept sending birthday wishes to everyone on their bday (Had a lot of strangers). Every time I wished a guy I got a thank you message. Not a single time I got a reply from a woman. You got to agree that women are assholes. Even if an enemy of mine wished me on my bday I'd thank them. Did I mention that women are assholes. If a girl doesn't give me IOIs or at least respond to my IOIs I won't play the game

Improving yourself doesn't mean shit if you're not actively approaching women.

Nice way to put pussy on pedestal. Would have meant something if you replaced 'improving yourself' with 'improving your smv'

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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