I told him, "I don't have to convince you that you were disrespectful for me to feel disrespected."

If you don't like how you're being treated, don't let any amount of "calm down, I wasn't even being mean, it's not a big deal" change your mind or make you think you have to put up with it.

You do not have to justify, argue, defend, or explain why you find certain behaviors unacceptable. They don't have to agree with your standards for you to enforce them. Do not waste precious years getting people to understand how they hurt you and trying to convince them to be better.