My life is decent and I'm lucky. I am also depressed and nothing excites me.

carolinaflash · 2020-03-02T14:49:07+00:00

Something that helped me out was cutting social media out. You’re essentially scrolling thru people’s best moments giving off the impression your life sucks when in reality they could be hurting worse than you. Sounds like you have good disciplines, so try and stay patience with your process. Try to find happiness in the actual process and not all-in for the results.

Also- try early am runs and cold shower/ meditation after. Sounds corny, but it helps jumpstart your day.

theUnBannableHulk · 2020-03-02T14:30:47+00:00

How can a Man be depressed when he has Purpose?

If he is not working to achieve his purpose that’s how.

OR

He hasn’t really found his purpose

OracleofFl · 2020-03-02T15:15:35+00:00

Go see a doctor. Depression is only somewhat related to your current circumstances. Read up on the Bio Psycho Social model of depression. It is one part biology, one part psychology (the deep shit, your childhoor, etc.) one part current curcumstnace.

AlphaMaleOnSteroids · 2020-03-02T16:58:41+00:00

I am going through the same thing. I miss my party, carefree days quite dearly. Look, you have responsibilities now. You thought the party would never end but now it has.

Your routine seems perfect, have you considered getting quality friends, perhaps an LTR?

BruhMoment45886 · 2020-03-02T17:21:38+00:00

Sounds to me like reality is sinking in. It's not all fun and games anymore. It's boring, tedious, and monotonous. Good news is that you said your life was already pretty good so just some minor tweaking could get you happy again.

So find out what's missing in your life and get that thing. Maybe you just need to try something new or have a new goal to work towards. If I get stuck in a rut I start a project to distract myself from negative thoughts.

I'm in college rn and I'm not having the same experience you had. I think theres two kinds of people. The ones that peak in hs/college and dont like adult life, and the ones that have lame hs/college years and say they liked their 30's the best.

tilleuno · 2020-03-02T18:01:02+00:00

Bro, sometimes it's good to just let everything you are working on (girls included) go, find some time and space to hear what you are not hearing within.

Depression, sadness, etc... All mainly stem from us ignoring a deep rooted need for something we aren't fulfilling ourselves with. It sounds vague, and it is, because only you can hear the answer. Either take some time AWAY from your life, or start to do different things in your current routine, read different books, meditate.

Changing your energy from what you are doing now may help you connect with yourself in a way you aren't able to right now.

Lives that "look good on paper" don't really mean shit when it comes to whatever it is that is within that we are neglecting.

oooKenshiooo · 2020-03-02T17:56:03+00:00

Been there.

I got better after I noticed that plowing through rows and rows of plates did not make me happy anymore. Had a great car, money, nice place and I could have banged a different hottie everyday. It was extremely fun for a while, not gonna lie. But eventually it all felt like playing a video game on repeat over and over.

I refocused on spending more time doing what I love (music and martial arts) and switched jobs to better supplement that.

I also switched from plates to LTR, because I want to have children within the next 4 years.

While running a successful LTR is a challenge of its own, especially if you aren't blue, I find it to be a rewarding experience. However, I am in my 30s now, so that might not be the right choice for you, yet.

Maybe you should go on a long trip for about 2 months to change perspective? I can recommend motorbiking in Asia.

Another word of advice though... You might also have a mental illness.

Mental conditions usually manifest in one's mid twenties, so a lot of people happen to misinterpret the signs of the onset as a aid ewffect of their transitional phase in life.

throwawayycheyeah · 2020-03-02T17:18:01+00:00

If you feel depressed please seek help. It sounds like you are on the right path. Just remember there is more to life then being in shape and having a decent income. Humans are social creatures. How often do you go out with friends? It sounds to me that more than missing the party days you just miss the feeling of being surrounded by your friends. We all go through that at some point but that doesnt mean you never have to spend time with them again.

merunas · 2020-03-02T17:35:02+00:00

Bro you need to move towards something. It can be as simple as learning the guitar.

Movement creates energy. Progress. Also keep your socials in check and stay cool.

I highly recommend you to volunteer. You'll work towards something greater than yourself which is exactly what will give you life.

extasis_T · 2020-03-02T17:00:35+00:00

High dose of mushrooms. Will reset the way you look at life. Thank me later

Thefreeman911 · 2020-03-02T20:19:51+00:00

I suffered with severe depression for eight years. It began when I was a mere eleven year old and lasted until around my 20th birthday.

I am 23 now and although the depression still lingers it has no power over me. I am very happy and healthy with plenty of luck in my life. And all it took for me was a change in mindset.

Imagine everyday negatively reinforcing yourself, every behavior you exhibit, every interaction you have being pessimistic. Eventually you will find yourself trapped in a void creating distance from the things you love about life.

All the music I listened to was about heartache, desires and a disdain for life (Radiohead, The Cure). The people I associated with were all downers who only took me down with them. The list goes on, I let depression become a part of me, an identity.

I started working with a young man age 25. He was diagnosed with cancer following his 8th birthday. Spent more than half of his life inside a hospital. His body did not produce much testosterone and due to his lack of growth hormone is 5'4", balding, weighs less than 100lbs and has a screech for a voice. And you know what? He gets up every morning to work, does his best to flirt with girls (he is very aware of his lack of looks) and still carries a heart of gold. The world is filled with people who actually LOST the genetic lottery.

And it made me realize how blessed I truly am. I slapped a smile on my face and started focusing on my hobbies, quit porn, cut back on media consumption, picked up a guitar and learned to dance. You sound like a successful/ above averave man to me and so many people crave that life.

You can and will overcome this my friend. Remember, plates are for spinning and having fun with, nothing more, plenty less. So start realizing your success instead of ignoring it. Change your mindset to overcome this. Every suggestion in this thread is a great idea.

You can overcome this feeling. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Tl;Dr: Change your mindset, celebrate success and take note of how blessed you truly are.

bilabrin · 2020-03-02T22:04:46+00:00

Depression is a "zooming out" problem.

Zoom in.

Don't worry about the rest of your life, worry about the rest of the hour and go from there. The map is always changing.

Read "The Power of Now" by Echart Tolle. Realize that you can, at any moment, escape your ever-present stream of thoughts, wants, needs, and worries, and then you can truly appreciate the beauty of being present in the unique part of time and space you currently exist in.

2020-03-02T23:42:02+00:00

I’m a little younger than you (20) but I can relate. I go to college as a full time student, work 20 hours a week, live with my parents, go to the gym, my money situation is good, etc.

But sometimes, I also feel the way you feel. What helps me is constantly striving to improve. Personally I am not happy if I’m not growing. Have you ever heard of “fixed mindset” vs “growth mindset?” Well, I was basically born with a growth mindset. I’ve always been that way without ever realizing it until I began following the red pill, and then I realized that I already had it. For me, growing and improving is how I find happiness.

Sounds to me like you’re in a rut. You’ve stopped improving. You’ve subscribed to society’s bullshit that once the “real world” kicks in (AKA post college) all the fun stops. Well in case you haven’t noticed, society is fucked- So don’t listen to them. Realize that there are different phases to life. And it’s perfectly okay to say “I’ve done this and enjoyed it, but now it’s time to move on to something else - Something better”

Human beings are like machines. If we just sit around, we get rusty and collect dust. Always be improving.

wawakaka · 2020-03-03T04:29:43+00:00

you are depressed because your needs are not being met. seems you are taking care of everybody, you mom, brother, and all the needy PLATES but no one is taking care of you. that shit will rob you of your soul.

you are working too hard. all the pushing you are doing to get somewhere might seem like you are achieving but really you are just running away, scared for your life.

you reminisce about the simple times because you were having fun and now you are not. you don't seem to know who you really are and maybe you need to take some time alone and see what will make you happy.

your life is very formulaic but there is no real formula for living your life.

2020-03-02T18:40:33+00:00

Low testosterone. Dont do drugs

new__vision · 2020-03-02T20:47:38+00:00

Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Your lower needs are met, start working on the higher ones like self-actualization.

trwawyrnd · 2020-03-02T22:11:05+00:00

read The Power of Now

catsdontsmile · 2020-03-02T18:10:05+00:00

Step 1. Uninstall instagram.

Research indicates its the social network with biggest impact in producing depression and dissatisfaction with your own life. What you see in Instagram is no one's life, its an idealization, cherry picked, made believe.

huey764 · 2020-03-02T18:48:43+00:00

First thing you should do is delete instagram/snapchat

charliemurphaay · 2020-03-02T19:45:13+00:00

I've got the same thing going man. I started seeing a therapist and it helps.

Wrath_of_Trump · 2020-03-02T21:40:18+00:00

People are going to get poetic about a purpose, but we (who aren't completely delusional) realize "purpose" is just a glorified form of entertainment. There is no objectivity to it or anything about it that makes it special except your fee fees. Your "purpose" could literally be to save children's lives, it could also be to shoot dope until you kill yourself, or paint pictures of flowers that look like pussies. There's no way to be objective about it, and maybe that's as good as it gets in this life. The only thing you can do is bide your time better and eliminate the things that are hurting you.

Find something you want to learn about in your free time that you can actually talk to people about.
Find something you want to be competitive in that you're not embarrassed to do.
You already work out which is a start, think about inviting others or helping other people work out, it's a good way to make acquaintances.
Don't delete your instagram, you don't need to be a loser. You need to uninstall it on your phone and only check it on the computer.
Lastly, get comfortable with being alone. We're not kids anymore, there's no classroom. If being by yourself scares you, you need to do it more often. When I got nostalgic for partying with my friends, I went out and partied on my own. Had a blast some nights. Some nights not so much. Then when you get tired of that, which will be a couple years, you'll be a little older and wiser and maybe better able to answer your own questions.

RileysRevenge · 2020-03-03T00:38:54+00:00

Get out of your Mom’s house. Living with people you don’t want to live with is draining beyond words and it’s subtle- you won’t know why you’re not happy but it’s because your living space isn’t what you want it to be.

Also, you should get a hobby that you can obsess over. Something like music, video games, cars, etc.

when_its_too_late · 2020-03-03T02:22:48+00:00

I'm your age. Felt the same way for a while.

Take one step every day to develop a bigger friend circle. Make clear measurable goals. Seems like you just feel lonely.

Snowboard18 · 2020-03-03T02:48:28+00:00

Sounds like persistent depressive disorder, I have it also it’s deep in my genes. I am one of the only males in my family that isn’t an alcoholic. I find that if I’m stagnet in life it becomes worse or I feel it more often. It have to force myself to keep working toward my goals, and that has been the biggest thing in treating it.

bourbonhipster · 2020-03-02T17:03:28+00:00

Food and a house (living with my mother and brother who I am sick of but whatever).

If you have a decent income, why the hell are you still in the nest?

AuberyBitoni · 2020-03-02T17:38:28+00:00

Delete social meida. And judging from your name you take steroids, cut that shit out IF you are using them, they make you feel depressed.

trprookie · 2020-03-02T17:56:05+00:00

Pick up a martial art. It will get you out of your head, and help you meet some like minded people along the way. You have healthy hobbies, but they're all hobbies done in solitude. In my case, doing Brazillian Jiu Jitsu has helped my mental health tremendously. You'll have something exciting to look forward to after work, versus the monotonous cycle of work, lift, eat, sleep repeat. Hope this helps!

trematar · 2020-03-02T18:07:29+00:00

What you need is a challenge. Right now, what are you doing with your mind and body? If you aren't going up against the grain, you will feel like a waste. Which that's what it sounds like. You should start a company! Figure out what the world needs and create it. Figure out what you're passionate about and market it. If you keep living in moms house looking at instagram and banging thots, then of course your life is being wasted and you will feel like you're missing out! Go out there and give yourself purpose. Watch videos of Jeff Bezos starting amazon in 1997, or founders of companies from the 80's and 90's. See how those men were driven and find out what caused them to change the world. Worse case scenario, you fail. Failure is the worlds greatest teacher.Everybody learns from their "own" failures, or "somebody else's" failures. Its better to have tried and failed then not tried at all. The reason your red pilled in the first place is because you learned from failures of yourself or other men, who then shared experiences.Go against the grain bro, its the only way to live. If you succeed, you will have created something far greater than yourself and you will have a legacy to leave behind.

cglehosit · 2020-03-02T19:21:52+00:00

Move out

paul_ernst · 2020-03-02T20:30:31+00:00

New plates/girls put so much pressure on me to care about them and give them validation ALL the fucking time.

No. You are putting that pressure on you.

I miss sunsets and company. I miss road trips.

It's not because you have money and lift that suddenly life becomes a walk around the rose garden. What you're saying here is key. Stop waiting for someone else to inject you with a new dose of fun. Take initiative. Small steps. Ask a friend to hang out but actually plan to DO something. Go for a run together, read a fucking book together. Actually do a one-day trip in the weekend somewhere. Play soccer on Wednesdays with the boys. Doing shit like that is what drives me today. Create the little moments 80% of people are just "scrolling by".

mrmaskfawkes · 2020-03-02T21:40:26+00:00

My man life isn't about getting to xyz goal, if your feeling this way look at what's causing you problems and cross it out (this doesn't include your job). See someone if it's worse than you described, but mainly slowly take away things that you hate. It's like joe rogan, he wasn't automatically happy he had to work a long time to slowly strip away the things that were eating him. If you don't know then sit by yourself in a room for an hour, don't mediate or do anything but think about what's bothering you and your mind will give you an answer.

RedPillAlphaBigCock · 2020-03-02T23:51:59+00:00

sounds like you need a VACATION , a break and then reunite with your purpose - take a break - travel solo for a few days - take half it to relax and half to re unite with your purpose

VigilantSmartbomb · 2020-03-03T02:29:12+00:00

Honestly, stop thinking you’re better than other people. Thinking of yourself as less than them in moments may bring you humbleness in realizing they have things to offer you if you dig deep enough. It doesn’t sound like you’re out there interacting with people. That’s what life is man, except when you think you’re too good for life. A fools game I played.

If the shoe doesn’t fit, but

Scheme00 · 2020-03-03T05:58:18+00:00

Have you tried an antidepressant? I felt like you and went on super small dose and have felt great since. It’s not for everyone and I was opposed to trying for years but man does it make a world of difference to me.

Thewritersdream · 2020-03-05T11:55:20+00:00

Quit wasting precious minutes of the day doing absolutely nothing (meditating) and I promise you your life will improve

mareacusarea · 2020-03-02T18:52:25+00:00

Depression with no apparent reason really sounds like a situation SSRI's could help. The right one can really switch you on.

JohnnyOmm · 2020-03-02T22:55:09+00:00

Microdose mushrooms brother. It helped.my anxiety and depression. There are subreddit under here that will help you /psychadelic /dmt /lsd. It's really real just read the stories of users who microdose. And no it doesn't make you trip out, I take a tenth of a tab before work and I feel perfect

drevil_ · 2020-03-02T17:01:17+00:00

The comfortable life of the mediocre male

Title	My life is decent and I'm lucky. I am also depressed and nothing excites me.
Author	AlphaMaleOnSteroids
Upvotes	143
Comments	92
Date	March 2, 2020 2:20 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/fccpr3/my_life_is_decent_and_im_lucky_i_am_also/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/my-life-is-decent-and-im-lucky-i-am-also-depressed.351382 https://theredarchive.com/post/351382