I don’t get it...I’m pretty muscular and lean but girls aren’t looking at me/giving me IOI’s. What am I doing wrong?

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March 2, 2020

I would say I’ve developed a nice physique kinda like Brad Pitt in the movie Troy but I haven’t been getting attention from girls at all...

I’m pretty decent looking in the face and dress nicely when I go out to bars and social events but whenever I look around, I don’t catch any girls looking my way...

All of my guy friends tell me that I look jacked and muscular but whenever I talk to girls, they always tell me they don’t like muscles/muscular dudes...

What am I doing wrong? Has anyone had a similar experience?

Post Information
Title I don’t get it...I’m pretty muscular and lean but girls aren’t looking at me/giving me IOI’s. What am I doing wrong?
Author shamakvv
Upvotes 92
Comments 136
Date 02 March 2020 03:17 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/351458
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/fc5qyu/i_dont_get_itim_pretty_muscular_and_lean_but/
Similar Posts

[–]mrpoopistan154 points155 points  (36 children) | Copy

The most important signal from a woman isn't eye contact. It's proximity.

If she's finding excuses to talk to you or to be near you, there's interest.

If they're talking with you, they disengage, and then find a way to come back, there's interest.

Even if she's just standing with the social circle you're talking with, there's at least a little interest. If you were a zero on the interest meter, she'd find a way to get herself and any friends of hers out of there.

[–]sehns116 points117 points  (4 children) | Copy

Yep this. Especially if she's really close to you with her back to you she wants to listen to what you have to say, these whores are like Assassins Creed or something

[–]Designof58 points59 points  (0 children) | Copy

"these whores are like Assassins Creed or something"

fucking lmao

[–]ShoesDoctor6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–]Ill_mumble_that8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

I was sending you IOI's all day!

while looking at you with binoculars from an upper story apartment with tinted windows.

[–]MrAnderzon14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy


[–]PhaedrusHunt10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

Listen to this guy

[–]UniqueAway4 points5 points  (26 children) | Copy

I don't get it, are you trying to get a single girl? What if there are always multiple girls interested in you at the same time, what would you do? There are always more than one girl should I flirt with both at the same time, in the same place?

[–][deleted]  (13 children) | Copy


[–]UniqueAway1 point2 points  (12 children) | Copy

No they aren't down for a threesome, they are jealous of each other

[–][deleted]  (11 children) | Copy


[–]UniqueAway3 points4 points  (10 children) | Copy

But it's school setting, we are classmates. I don't want to get reported. And this is slightly conservative EU country. I struggle to isolate, yeah we talk on class, they flirt but if I want her number or invite her somewhere it will go into a relationship because I know the girls also tell their friends like they mark me as theirs not to lose to their friend, and even to their guy friends. Its like they are pursuing a possible relationship and I am bored of this.

[–][deleted]  (9 children) | Copy


[–]UniqueAway2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy

What do you mean? I focus on my studies but girls doesn't let me haha. I am a bit older then them and it attracts them I think. I don't know what I want, girls are literally chasing me and I want them all. Should I get into a relationship with one?

[–]Freedom__Fighter7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

no dont get into a relationship.... ffs mate, use your efforts and brain for school, use your cock on the pussy, dont put them in an LTR they will pull you away from your studies and then dump you when you flunk out for being a loser. This is a fact in life. Read the sidebar

[–]Ill_mumble_that0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

You are very new to TRP I see.

Get 10 plates and then ask that question again.

Don't even think about committing to one until you have gotten said plates.

[–]UniqueAway0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Okay but how? Now I am in a shopping mall for example, lots of girls checking me out from cashiers to rich girls. I have courage to talk to them but then what?

[–]mrpoopistan1 point2 points  (11 children) | Copy

If there are multiple women in a spot and one is interested in you, one of two things is going to happen.

Possibility #1: The other women notice her interest you, and then a cascading effect occurs where the other women get interested in you.

Possibility #2: Your SMV is so low that one of the other women will stage an intervention to stop it. Hell, women will do this for strangers.

There isn't much to "do" in scenario 1. Be social and .take over the social circle to the point that people just assume you're in charge.

In my experience, the ensuing competition for your attention has close to zero to with you. The women at that point are having a battle of their own social standing, and the one willing to kneecap her friends usually wins.

Even in a threesome, there's always one chick working harder to get it.

My experience has been that the chick who wins is either 1) the one willing to do more drastic stuff to impress the guy with her willingness or 2) the socially dominant chick who simply locks the others out because they fear the backlash that will come if they win.

Once you're dealing with women's group dynamics, you stop being all that important to the decision-making that occurs.

Even when the women don't know each other, they will rapidly form a pecking order that determines who gets access to the man. Then the only question is whether one of them is willing to piss the group off by being a "slut."

[–]stenay1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Possibility #1: The other women notice her interest you, and then a cascading effect occurs where the other women get interested in you.

This actually happened with me when I was a student. Some girl liked me and I showed some interest back in her. As a cascading effect I started getting IOIs from like 5 more girls. I was too beta at that time to do anything about it though :(

[–]mrpoopistan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

My all-time "stupid pre-TRP me" story involves this sort of scenario.

There was a girl I was completely in the bag for freshman and sophomore years of college. I gave it my absolute best shot -- ya know . . . what I thought was a great shot at the time -- and it crashed and burned fabulously with full friending.

I figured, fuck it, took my shot. Life goes on. Didn't have a Plan B anyhow.

A few weeks later, this girl who was the definitive hot "exotic" girl, mixed Vietnamese and black, shows up in the club the other girl and I were in. The mixed girl is completely into me.

Suddenly, the previous girl has a strong need to tease. One day she even sat on my lap in front of everyone and then said, "I guess I shouldn't tease."

Dumbass me at the time just ended up being pissed about the whole thing.

[–]UniqueAway0 points1 point  (8 children) | Copy

I didn't get what I should do in scenerio 1? What do you mean I am in charge?

[–]mrpoopistan2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy

So you've basically just been getting jacked and not developing any social game . . . okay, you're not the first guy to commit the mistake . . .

Social circle game is an essential tool. Your goal in a social circle is to be a little more interesting than all the other guys. You want to be talking a good bit and having immense fun while you do it -- all self-amused, of course.

When you get to the funny parts of jokes, you want to be so amused at the laughs that other people laugh even if they don't get it or like it. You want to be animated with your hands when demonstrating points. You want to scan the group, making eye contact to keep everyone engaged.

Most people are socially retarded and can't lead a group. Simply being the open and engaging person will make you the center of most groups. People assume whoever has all the eyes on them is in charge.

Bear in mind, you don't want to be a dancing monkey. You're not trying to amuse and entertain these people. They're supposed to be in thrall of you because you're just too much to ignore.

If it feels like you're doing entertainment for them, it's not going well. If it feels like they're working for your attention, then you've got it.

[–]UniqueAway0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

In my case most people around me are social, they lead the conversation, laugh, and I am the one who joins the conversations rarely, but smile be sympathetic. I was feeling weird before but now I am comfortable. May I be Sigma? Because I feel like girls get attracted to me, not to the ones who talk a lot and laugh. I feel like I can attract a girl even if she has a bf.

[–]mrpoopistan3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

I feel like girls get attracted to me, not to the ones who talk a lot and laugh.

My best guess is that your friends are social but not necessarily in control of the social circle. Remember, it's not about laughing and having fun. It's about being so amused by your own awesomeness that other people can't resist.

Also, it sounds like you don't break out of your group a lot. There's a lot to be said for talking to strangers.

Because I feel like girls get attracted to me, not to the ones who talk a lot and laugh. I feel like I can attract a girl even if she has a bf.

There appears to be some sort of problem. Otherwise you wouldn't be asking for advice.

May I be Sigma?

Sigma? Oof. You've been ingesting some bad TRP, man. There's a lot to unpack here . . .

Of all the alleged TRP concepts, sigma is one I wish would just die. It's a cop-out. It's what guys who don't want to play social game imagine is the cool alternative.

Let's be clear, we're all primates. The entire alpha-beta-gamma-omega structure that you read in TRP is consistently misused as it relates to primates.

Let's talk about the actual hierarchy among great apes, not the bullshit one that internet weebs invented.

Alpha: the incumbent leader ape. He gets access to greater breeding privileges.

Betas: supporters of the alpha. They are alphas in waiting, and they will kill and replace the alpha when shit gets real.

Gammas: the everyday apes. Not much to say. They're good as long as they don't piss the alphas and the betas off.

Omegas: the exist at the fringe of society. They're tolerated because they can still donate resources to the group, but they're living at the edge of disaster because they need the group more than the group needs them.

Every other ape: Is a dead ape waiting to happen. They're not part of a group, and it is a matter of time before they die in the wilderness.

There is no sigma. The only thing that even creates the illusion of such a thing is that modern civilization sustains out-of-group humans because they're workers and consumers. When civilization breaks down, people suddenly find their groups or die.

We're all just naked plains apes living in a world we weren't built for. We're supposed to be living in villages of 50 to 250 people who know each other pretty well, and that's what our brains are built for.

In such an environment, no one gets to comfortably exist on the edge of civilization. Those who are stuck scraping by at the edge are put there by some social stigma.

Just to wrap this thing up . . .

I think you're leaning on a lot of stuff as a crutch. You're focusing on things that stay entirely in your control, like lifting and a particular attitude toward socialization.

TBH, if you do what you've always done, don't be surprised when you get what you've always gotten.

[–]UniqueAway0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

Yes I badly need to interact with strangers and I will. But I have a quiet voice, do you have any remedies for that?

But civilization won't be breaking down soon. I believe there is such thing as Sigma in modern world because, you can go your own way in modern world, you don't need a group to earn money in some situations, besides mystery is also attractive and sigmas are quiet and mysterious. But most shy guys might think they are sigma just to feel good, in reality Sigma's must be so rare. If I am not sigma then what I am? I am definitely not alpha but girls are chasing me relentlessly. How can you explain that?

And how come you find energy and willpower to write such long and detailed answers? :)

[–]mrpoopistan1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

how come you find energy and willpower to write such long and detailed answers? :)

When it comes to topics like "sigma," it's because I have a bug up my ass about that stuff. Also, I type quickly.

civilization won't be breaking down soon.

Give it a chance.

I have a quiet voice, do you have any remedies for that?

I don't think you have to have a big and loud voice -- I do, but I grew up white trash, and I was constantly told I'm loud.

My best advice is to just speak in your voice but to do it more often and without a sense of self-awareness. Rinse and repeat until you've developed your voice.

mystery is also attractive and sigmas are quiet and mysterious

To a point. There has to be some payoff, though. Not much, but you have to give a chick something to work with.

Also, mystery and social circle game aren't mutually exclusive. I'm good at social circles, but most people I socialize with barely know me.

With the exception of a handful of close friends, I don't disclose much. There's a big difference between storytelling (or bullshitting) and personal disclosure. especially when it comes to strangers, disclosures should be parsed out in small doses to maintain interest.

I am definitely not alpha but girls are chasing me relentlessly. How can you explain that?

Like I complained about before, the binary notion that you're either an alpha or you're total trash is overdone in TRP.

Here's the thing . . . if you have enough indicators of social, mental and physical fitness, a woman will want to test drive you.

Every woman's a little different in which metrics hit the mark for them. You see that in the difference between chicks who just go dumb for muscles (T-shirt muscle guys). Other women lose their minds over status without any thought to how unfuckably hideous the guy is (rock stars). Same thing applies with funny guys where some women go completely into thrall because mental fitness is tested through verbal agility (comedians).

You're operating with at least one fitness indicator that's enough to buy you some interest with one group of women who focus more on the physical side.

Honestly, you can probably just roll with that if you want to push it a little harder and just go for chicks who go dumb for muscles. I just figure a process of constant improvement means you should try to improve in the other two areas.

Most guys make the mistake of operating in one lane. It's not disastrous, but there ought to be more to life than easily being tagged a fitness guy, a funny guys or a status guy.

[–]UniqueAway0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I am 30 years old went back to college and girls know that, I look above average but nothing fancy, I have an average body. Obviously I am still a student and don't have any status. I am not social, I barely talk to anyone in classes. I don't have much friends and when girls see me at campus I am mostly alone. I definitely have nothing to show off and when I am outside school I carry my bag so woman know I am a student and an old one. I don't look really old though but obviously I am not 18-20 either. Yet woman don't leave me alone. Think about it like,from 15-16 years old high school girls to 30-40 years old business woman, cashiers, college students, I have a really big scale. Look, my sister's friend, 16 interested in me like fuck I am 30 and she knows that. Sometimes, professors hit on me etc.

[–]CC-c0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

The most important signal from a woman isn't eye contact. It's proximity.

Source? Thanks

[–]mrpoopistan1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Real-world experience.

Feel free to test drive it.

[–]alina_baraz153 points154 points  (9 children) | Copy

Women will never make it obvious they are staring at you...

They will just give you a subtle glance. If you can’t pick up on that, then it’s your fault.

[–]wheremyballsgo71 points72 points  (5 children) | Copy

When I catch them eye fucking me they look away real fast and act busy lol

[–]i-am-the-prize83 points84 points  (4 children) | Copy

When you make eye contact smile slightly. When they don’t look away Raise your eyebrows a bit and smile again. (Or do the chin raise - physical “hey” head nod)

If they smile back or look down, walk up right then. Don’t delay. Don’t transmit ”I’m scared of you, you half naked 110 pound person”

The more aggressive and Dangerous you look the more they may be scared of you. The more hot/player you look the more ASD you may trigger.

Use those as assets to predict their behavior. Just surprise them by being able to hold a convo and smile. Be the beast they want to tame.

[–]Ill_mumble_that7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

When a female is giving you eye contact I suggest the Kobe "black mamba" look in response to assert dominance.

[–]i-am-the-prize0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

funny, but according to 2 different authors on sidebar books it works. the "finger point" (one guy even does finger gun and shoots the target chick) work because they're so audaciously goofy, it makes the target laugh.

[–]Ill_mumble_that1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Funny and effective is how I roll.

[–]frognads2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This ^

[–]menial_optimist13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm so non-calibrated on this sublte artform. Does an IOI glance contain a special "look"? What's a IOI glance vs a normal passing-by glance? I've had this cute asian girl at my gym double take me as I walk by, however I see nothing in her eyes that indicates interest, only vague stares.

[–]WonderfulPipe2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Idk man, there is a girl on my morning bus that fucking stares at me like crazy, I used to lock eye contact and it gets very tense, I don't find her attractive so I avoid her now, but I can notice that she's looking straight at me a lot even when I'm not, tbh I even feel like she has some kind of mental illness, I don't think thats normal at all.

[–]stenay0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Had a girl at work standing at the entry of our hall and looking at me for a good few minutes. I saw her from my desk but I didnt know what to do so I just ignored her.

[–]Senior Endorseddr_warlock119 points120 points  (9 children) | Copy

they always tell me they don’t like muscles/muscular dudes..

lol, you believed them

[–]iwviw49 points50 points  (4 children) | Copy

I’ve been in op position before. Just because you get jacked doesn’t mean you don’t have to approach. Still have to approach, small talk, flirt. You just have to put a very small effort if you really look that good. My guess is that even though op looks like Pitt he still has low self esteem over thinks and doesn’t believe in himself YET.

A jacked beta is still a beta

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

He also might not be dressing himself well. When you’re jacked then a black plain fitted vneck will get you more play than a “nicer” button down.

[–]madfrombrad1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Wear playboy and a fake rolex

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like someone needs to lift more

[–]bluefingerblue12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy

And judging by OP’s post history, there’s a zero percent chance he looks like Brad Pitt from Troy.

OP - step one is actually getting off your ass and getting in good shape. Step two is not lying about bullshit on the internet to boost your ego. Step three and after can be trying to get girls.

[–]RevolutionaryPea74 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

There are at least a couple of reasons why women might say they don't find alpha qualities attractive.

The first is their time of the month. Studies have shown that women will sometimes seek out beta pansies at certain times of the month. Not a single woman understands that they change with their hormones but the differences are profound.

The second is that they are actually insecure and don't think they could ever be attractive to such an alpha. Women are way more insecure than men and never have to learn to overcome it. They will outright lie and say that objectively attractive men that are way out of their league aren't their type to protect their own egos. If you don't them attractive then these are exactly the type of women you should target because they already think that you have higher SMV than them.

[–]inbredostrptw2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Shit test, just keep talking to them. Maybe pick them up at some point

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–]stenay0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A few days ago a girl kept looking at me at the airport. This happened like 3 times in an hour. She was sitting at the seats right in front of me so I thought maybe a coincidence. I had planned to approach her and then she called her boyfriend...

When we reached the destination and I was walking back the same girl is standing at the luggage belt looking at me again. Why the f are you staring at me if you have a bf?

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (8 children) | Copy

Girls don't oggle men like we do to women. They will usually actively avoid eye contact. You need to pick up on them looking in your direction, and be able to tell the difference between a woman who is actually just looking in your direction by coincidence and a woman who is looking in your direction to check on what you're up to.

Our eyes are pretty amazing. We are able to stand on the other side of a lecture theatre to someone else and tell if they're looking at us or something next to us. If you scan a room and find women's eyes are darting away from you as you do it, it's probably because they're very aware of you and were checking you out but are avoiding getting caught. But not always, like I said before sometimes they're just checking out the room as well.

The biggest way to tell is if it keeps happening with the same girl. If it happens once or twice, chalk it up to coincidence. If it keeps happening, you might have a girl checking you out there.

Also, and this is less reliable and I haven't got much proof to show for this theory, if a woman is actually never looking at you, that could mean she's interested but shy. People look at each other. Think about it, if you're in a gym and you walk past people, you casually look in their direction from time and time and check out what people are doing. It's what humans do - we look at each other. If someone is COMPLETELY ignoring you, as in seemingly never even acknowledging your existence, it could mean they're in fact very aware of you. You need to be very careful with this thinking though, because this is basically how guys can end up pursuing a girl who is actually repusled by them. Completely ignoring you could also mean they're avoiding you because they think you're a creep, but either way it probably means you're on their mind.

[–]White_Phillip0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Women have better peripheral version than men, men have much more tunnel vision (helps with focus and throwing). That's a big reason why men get caught checking ladies out more than the reverse.

[–]Designof-3 points-2 points  (6 children) | Copy

I thought this sub was man only.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

If you're here to try and put strangers down on the internet you're in the wrong place. TRP isn't for you. We're all about building each other up, and we recognise that trying to put other people down is just a sign that you yourself are very insecure.

[–]Designof0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Lmao, just reread your post and realized your not actually a woman. My bad.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Ah i see. Let's hug it out bro, I'll even let you touch my ass if you let me touch yours

[–]Designof1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sure bro, go ahead. I kinda like it.

[–]theyearsstartcomin0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You can leave any time

[–]db1000c37 points38 points  (0 children) | Copy

Muscles aren't a personality. A strong personality and secure ego will lead to improved body language and confidence in a room. Girls will see you desperately looking around the room trying to see if they are checking you out. Go and pick the girls, don't wait for them to pick you.

[–]majani6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Occam's Razor says that you're probably overrating yourself. If not then most likely you're suffering from having a swivel head. You have to give girls the space to think that it's OK to look at you. This is done by being focused on whatever you're doing

[–]smgtn11 points12 points  (2 children) | Copy

I'm in a similar position, but I mostly daygame. Here's the thing - your face may not be as "decent looking" as you think. Face is everything to most women.

I'm 183 cm (6 feet), lifting 10 years, dress to impress, impeccable hygiene, deep masculine voice, very confident, but I have average at best face and bald (shaved) head. The last two are costing me some major points. I've been out with other daygamers and I've seen guys who are shorter, don't lift, dress like shit, do much better than me simply because they had nicer faces and hair.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–]Kyomeii2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You can only do so much with the genetics you're given. Of course naturally good looking dudes who also put in the effort will get more pussy than less unfurtunate dudes who put in similar amount of effort. It's all about reaching your own potential, don't compare yourself to others.

[–]Protocol_Apollo32 points33 points  (1 child) | Copy

  1. Women don’t make it obvious when they stare at you.

  2. Actions not words remember? Vast majority, if not all, women prefer muscles (unless you look like Phil Heath).

But dude do you even lift?

From your post history, you seem more interested in knowing what’s naturally possible or who’s on juice rather than lifting.

[–]Kabuki4315 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Female blindness is a thing. I lost count on how many times I have seen women who give "fuck me right here right now" look and guys are oblivious.

Women are subtle creatures, start reading for all the hints in this post.

[–]Merica9115 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Of course they notice you, even more, they may be noticing something more that you're not.

They may notice that you're going above and beyond trying to be notice, and for that they're making sure that you don't notices that they notices them staring at you. Because they know that's what you want and from sounds of it, you work hard to make that a mission for other to do so, that particular force energy people (especially girls) do the opposite. But with people's memory (especially girls) all they need is 1 second and their minds holds on to the rest. Why you think many women read non-fiction romance books? They don't need to read the book over and over again to get they picture. On the contrary, they burn through that book within 1 week and on to the next.

Women are great Artist. They can tap into the left side of the brain more. They ten to see an image once and able to drawn it pretty good. They're many that apply makeup good, hairstylist, Home decorators etc etc.

The point I'm trying to make is women are not men. When a woman rolls up in the gym with a nice ass, men won't stop staring. To the point they're thinking about what to make a post workout meal while staring at her ass. I feel like many needs Constant reassurance via left brain acceptance that's why many men watch porn daily. I the flip side, women can watch it once a month and that image sticks to them a lot longer nor do the need to keep looking at it.

But you do know looks is one out of many pillars when it comes to attraction. Another pillar is confidence. Are you good looking but need to seek people attention approval? That's a sign of lack of and that could be weighting you down.

You have to get use of not looking constantly if people are watching you but do try to notice time to time. An attractive woman rather get hit by a car over you noticing her staring at you over the other way around.

I know dude, it's a huge mind fuck.

[–]amwfhunter7 points8 points  (12 children) | Copy

.....you dont talk to the girls?

[–]Bagul_demon17 points18 points  (11 children) | Copy

It’s amazing how many guys still don’t understand this...women don’t approach, even if they are attracted/interested in you!

[–]DirtyLickins10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

True shit. Only sluts approach you if you're good-looking. Never had any dignified woman approach me, but they do tons of momentary eye contact.

[–]dharma_anon5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

That's just not true. Personal experience.

[–]LegLicker0852 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

That is horseshit. Women approach you if they find you attractive

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

>this is what redditors actually believe

[–]UniqueAway-1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy

What do you mean interested in you? They are interested in getting into bed directly or want to hang out, spend time and expect possible relationship? I can't get it, I have lots of girls interested in me in the same friend circle, they probably know each others interest in me and that makes them want me even more. But what am I gonna do? I can't fuck two friends at the same time right? They aren't close but they know each other, that's an example, I have tons of girls interested.

[–]send_it_for_the_boys1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

I banged 2 “best” friends for about a month, they ended up in a competition with each other to impress me more than the other, each of them ended up showing me their own set of major issues and it turned into 1 faking being pregnant & going off the rails in an emotional shit storm out rage, and the other losing her shit and throwing stuff at me because I was straight forward about not wanting to date her....in the beginning I thought it was fun....but I wouldn’t do it again “lesson learned” frame took a hard blow from that ordeal..I have posts about it wayyyy back. Maybe if you had 2 “somewhat mature” women that were cool with casual & possible 3somes sure it may be fun for awhile otherwise, shit probably will hit the fan.

[–]UniqueAway0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

But the girls I talk about is my classmate, I don't want to end up in trouble.

Doesn't most your hook-ups end up the girl trying to make it a relationship?

[–]send_it_for_the_boys1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Gotcha. Yes and no but I wanted to share that because the scenario is a little over the top...or a lot.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–]send_it_for_the_boys0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Depending on your definition of a friend

[–]mike_pith7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

Just go up to them and say hi!

Odds are they are just waiting for you to make the first move, then it’s smooth sailing from there!

[–]jzekyll66 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

It’s 2020. There’s no such thing as smooth sailing.

[–]Anonymous2k185 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

You obviously live on the internet

[–]jzekyll60 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Elaborate and save me from disillusionment

[–]Cientocincuenta8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

How much do you jack off and watch porn ? If it's too much, your brain will be appeased where it is, getting "sex" all the time with no effort. Stop that for a few weeks, and the build up will send unconscious sexual signals all around you. We are shit picking up this kinds of things, while girls are masters of non verbal communication.

[–]xxx69harambe69xxx16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

u ugly

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–]jzekyll67 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Is this what askTRP is now

OP, you’re not gay, but you are a pussy.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You’re face is probably unattractive?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

When they say they don't like muscular guys, they lie. But what they mean is that they don't like guys whose only ambition is going to the gym.

You have to make it obvious that you have a life project, ambition and improve yourself, would it be in career, life, culture, or physical condition.

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy


[–]White_Phillip1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Otter mode looks good shirtless at the beach but you look like any other skinny dude dressed up. Kinda like how power lifters look like fat dudes with clothes on.

[–]send_it_for_the_boys0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I’ve never understood it either he just looks like a plain semi athletic dude that does crunches & a morning jog...nothing wrong with that if that’s the body you want but if we’re talking movie stars.....something similar to Sylvester Stallone is an ideal physique IMO.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Wear shorts, short sleeve shirts, and wear one size down. I wear short sleeves even in winter so I can show off my arm definition and assert my dominance.

[–]Huntbutt2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Bro you might be ugly :(

jk but maybe you're overthinking it

[–]Haytch12343 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Girls dont make anywhere near as obvious as guys.

Stop looking for hints to approach. This tells us you are seeking permission to approach a girl when you should approach regardless. You may be surprised.

[–]Meloxian1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I disagree - ams always says wait for choosing signals because it’s not about permission it’s about wasting your valuable fucking time with a chick that doesn’t have high interest

[–]theUnBannableHulk3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your face looks like shrek. Marine.

Jk 😂

Dunno OP bishes be dumb . Bring lean isn’t the and all being jacked gets way more attention

[–]thicknecck1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Eye contact/smile, proximity and touch in this order.. Go get ‘em now!

[–]sehns1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Girls won't stare, but if she even so much as makes eye contact briefly, thats an IOI to go talk.

[–]mobiotool1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

It’s more about how you carry yourself with confidence then your physique, but if you have two together, even better.

[–]CochinoChingon2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This, confidence, wit and humor go farther than looks and money, usually

Standing around like a peacock so everyone notices that your jacked SCREAMS insecure to a woman. They're better at reading body language than most guys are. And they can read fakes

[–]Dimenzije901 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Some women find jacked dudes too intimidating. I didnt say they wouldnt want to date or fuck you. They just feel like you're way above them so they dont dare look at you. My advice to you. Just dtart aproching and you will see how they give you more IOI's.

[–]TripleDragons1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your verbal game is week or creepy, rather than confident.

[–]Bone_Coat1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

All of my guy friends tell me that I look jacked and muscular but whenever I talk to girls, they always tell me they don’t like muscles/muscular dudes...

bullshit. they like it, but feel intimidated by your SMV

[–]PutlockerAndChill1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your post history reeks of pure autism, clearly you have validation issues with poor self esteem topped with a side dish of massive unearned ego.

[–]the12yearold-Atheist1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why don't you, you know, actually approach them instead of second guessing.

[–]BlaseJong1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah , sorry to say it dude, but this is a classic case of oblivious guy. Girls are subtle. They want to be approached. I bet you have missed several opportunities whilst standing at the bar looking around doing nothing!

Learn lessons, and implement action plans next time!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You might have a shit vibe. You may be too serious looking; loosen up, smile, and have fun.

[–]zercher221 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Being lean like Brad Pitt in Troy is not going to get you any obvious additional IOI's from women as your just going to look 'slim' when your in any clothing. You need to get jacked so your popping out of your clothes, ain't nobody gonna see your six pick through a t-shirt unless you walk around like some faggot in a string vest all day.

[–]porkmissiles1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Judging by your post history the problem is that you're gayer than Christmas.

[–]RPthrowaway1231 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Truthfully I've experienced this myself OP. I think there's an element of it that is confidence, how you carry yourself, ect. Women can fucking smell that shit when no matter what, it's like a super power...and if you don't have the confidence or the alpha attitude or whatever you want to call it, then it drags you down a bit regardless of what you look like.

[–]drcube20001 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You ended 3 of your 5 sentences with "...". You don't know how to communicate effectively, you're non-committal, and you're insecure. Work more on talking to women. You have to have a personality too.

[–]tyrantgrey3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy

How tall are you? And what do you look like?

Not attractive is not unattractive. But it still won’t get you girls. And a lack of height is a deal breaker in America.

[–]alina_baraz6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

I’ve seen plenty of average/below average guys get girls...looks aren’t the only thing that matters.

If you have good game, you’ll get girls regardless of how you look.

[–]stenay0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What is considered "short" ?

[–]DirtyLickins0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy


[–]ElSenorNacho1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

What the fuck is this shit?

[–]OfficerWade0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If it’s too complicated just leave it alone. Don’t fight yourself, that just makes it worse. When a women you fancy is nearby make her feel the presence in the room that you felt. Does she seem happy that you noticed her? Do you feel anxious? These are all the signs that you are pushing the rock up the mountain like sysiphous , that Greek god who was condemned to push a boulder up a mountain again and again. In regular speaking terms it means you are alive and challenging yourself. Don’t stop doing what you’re doing.

[–]bert_cj0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

[–]Rhyat2500 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

buddy they notice. they are just Covert about it, while you are walking they probaly make quick glance and think " This guys is ripped"

[–]frognads0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

  1. What does your face look like?
  2. What do you dress like?

[–]2ComplexProjection0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Don't spend too much time wondering if a girl wants you. The true question is: do you want her? If yes, take the necessary steps.

[–]TheGrandTrinket0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Women have a higher peripheral vision. They don’t have to look directly at you to check you out

[–]Redditorsheaven0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Face > Confidence/Game > Muscle/Height

[–]warthundersfw0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I have legit ugly af friends that have girls go up and grind to their marble cutness... get in better shape

[–]Wrath_of_Trump0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

they're not going to make it obvious unless they've had a few drinks and the truth projectile vomits out. one of the worst things you can do imo is stew in the question "is she checking me out?" it does you no good. and fyi, brad pitt in troy is not enough unless you have the face. half the people on instagram look like brad from troy, it doesn't work anymore. i was lean for a while and i'll admit i got a lot of attention, very overt ioi's (literally rubbing my dick at the bar stool), but it's not a panacea. you still have to be on point

[–]AceMav210 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Wear Tommy Hilfiger

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Based on OPs history probably a case of social autism tbh

[–]LegLicker0850 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How tall are you?

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The other aspects of your physical impression are:

  • Grooming
  • Clothes
  • Posture/movement

Those are actually more important than fitness, because those directly communicate status, whereas fitness is an indirect status indicator. In other words, it's possible to be a fit beta.

[–]White_Phillip0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

If you want to actually test how attractive you are, use Tinder. It's harsh but effective. Post your best pictures, at least one shirtless, and the median range of women is where you're at. You can generally do a couple steps better in person.

[–]pinkypeabody-2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy

Lmao imagine being worried about this...

[–]SupremeBBC-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

this lmao. Who the fuck even cares?

[–]hereonymous-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're not doing any thing wrong. They really don't matter unless you would like to have children.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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