Are there older men (30+) in the United States who actually are bachelors and live this kind of life?

thrwy75479 · 2020-03-04T00:45:11+00:00

Most of the forever bachelors I've seen last till their late 30s. Then, it's marriage, and early 40s they popped out a kid, or two.

It's the sensible thing to do.

Of course, they've all cheated on their wives now and then because they know their SOs can't do better. And, they're loaded, and connected, so they still go around creating mischief by fucking around with the have-nots.

Wtfbyamey · 2020-03-04T00:12:42+00:00

Yes and they are not wasting time on red pill message boards

VasiliyZaitzev · 2020-03-04T04:34:36+00:00

52 checking in. So, what you are really talking about, because I'm guessing you are a (very) young guy, is having a life where you have a lot of control over what you do, how you spend your time, and have regular access to sex with attractive women.

The reason I say that is that what you are describing is what you imagine your ideal life would be as a full grown man. Why do I think this? Because as a grown man you want to spend a lot less time in clubs than you can imagine, now. Or maybe you are a not-quite-so-young-guy who is pining for a life he didn't have at university (fraternity, sports team, whatever).

1 - Having $ is like having an option on the future...I like the optionality of cash and it's a good idea to have enough of it to last you through a year of expenses and shit. You have to figure out what you're good at and monetize that. And don't get caught up in too much consumerism and buying a lot of shit you don't need. Think of money as a took that can get you things and experiences that you want. Get (and keep) your $ straight.

2 - Partying. Booze. Oy. I enjoy spending time with people whose company I enjoy. This can be by a fire, with a drink, it can be by a pool (whether mine or at a resort), it can be on a boat (better to have a friend with a boat, rather than owning it yourself) or it can be elsewhere.... but this is less and less likely to be in a club with a pounding bass and a dj screaming "IS NEW YORK IN DA' HOUUUUUUUZ?!" When I was in my mid-30s I ran with an early/mid-20s crowd, so sometimes that happened, but now? Fuck that noise. OTOH, if I want to bounce to Europe, Hawaii, wherever, I do it. See #1. If I want to go to a concert or an event, I go.

3 - In my old age, I prefer to at least like the girl as a person. I run a soft-harem of 20-27 year old girls, with one woman in her 30s who is committed to fitness and has kept it right, tight and in the light. Picking up randos is more work and less fun than enjoying sex with women you know and like. Girls are added or subtracted from the rotation as necessary - maybe they decide they want different things, maybe I decide that it's time for them to go. I like being able to have multiple young women I can bang, rather than having ONE woman who is 50 years old deciding if I'm getting laid that night.

4 - You will have less friends who do this as you get older, either because of attrition (a good buddy of mine drank himself to death at 50 - you have to be able to recognize when you need to throttle down, and no amount of interventions from his family and friends would stop him), or marriage, etc. I'm generally in the "APPROVED" category for the wives of my friends (i.e. the wives will not toss a fit if the husbands come hang with me because nobody gets wasted/arrested/dead). Also, you will pick and choose. So when GnR reunited a couple of years ago, I decided I wanted to go. So I picked a friend of mine who I knew would be into it and could swing his half of a pair of front row seats, and I picked a date that was in a city where he lived and he got a hall pass from his wife. It was a great time. If I want to go to Vegas (Spoiler Alert: This isn't all that often. I am a 'casual user' of Vegas) there are a couple of guys I can call and then we go. Also, some of your friends (statistically ~50%) will get divorced so some of them will be more available, but they might have less cash if they got divorce raped or have kids to pay child support on.

If you want to get married later in life that's always an option. If it's in your own age cohort, you will have the advantage of less baggage (no kids, ex-wives, not divorce-raped) and you can pick up younger women if you take care of yourself and learn the signs of young women who prefer older guys.

At any rate, you might profit from reading the "After Hours" and "Advice to Young Men" sections of "CorporateLand" on the sidebar.

ETA: you seem to be focused on externalities to make you happy. Happiness doesn’t come from the outside, it comes from within.

creating_my_life · 2020-03-04T03:43:06+00:00

The funny thing about getting older is that #1, #2, and #3 are less important. But you will never understand why until you are older...

bsutansalt · 2020-03-04T02:22:02+00:00

I did in my 30s, but lately not so much. Just don't have the drive to go out like I used to. At this point I prefer to do things low-key and have the fun at my place.

Why compete against an entire venue for someone's attention when I can bring them into my world, the small pond, where I'm the big fish with the highest status. That's how you stack the deck in your favor.

i-am-the-prize · 2020-03-04T03:54:26+00:00

i am married and late 40's. one of my friends (near 20 yr friendship) is 51 and single. he was engaged once, but never married. he has no kids. he does well financially but is not a business owner, pulls like quarter mil salary + bonus, but we live in an expensive city. he's not rich, but without kids and no debt, he travels, dresses well, has a sweet place to himself and does a lot of eating out and concerts galore.

he's RP without knowing RP. I've hinted a few things to him and he's like: "no shit, what's the hook?" he's a Natural, truly busy living life. He's about 6'2" average to handsome, lifts for fitness (not size) but it's his natural game that does it for him. he. talks. to. every. body. he bangs 23-27yr olds routinely. he has a few cougars (hot hot ass signle moms) on speed dial as they are "less headache to bust a nut" but pulls kidless tail half his age all the time. what we call plates he calls 'dates' and he has 3-4 girls always in his rotation. we share a block of tickets for a pro-sports-team season tickets, so go out as a group 3-4x a month during the season as a group, and I meet his plates. they are no shit hot, not just young, nothing below an HB8, like turn heads hot. social proof big time b/c when we go out to dinner before hand, or bars after, he seems to know everyone, and the hotter his date, the more competition from the women he says hello to (ie: they begin text'ing him within minutes, and he shows me his phone and grins). he gets selfie nudes (aka: self shots) from prevoius plates to get his attention, he uses "clean your room" and shit like we read about naturally, it's a sight to behold. (and no, these games are not a first date. a chick only comes to dinner and the game with us *after* they've fucked, our seats are top notch courtside, so he doesn't waste them on 'maybe' girls, only confirmed lays). oh funny part, since we're courtside we're really easy to spot on TV and my wife usually quips the next morning, "so, XYZ's date last night was rather tall and blonde and busty..." me: "she's alright... lots of pretty women out there..." so instant dread vicariously through proximity. ah good times.

f2f: he's not an asshole to them, quite the opposite, meaning he always acts a gentleman** when in a group setting, unless they shit on him overtly, then tells them to bounce (mid date) and pay for their own cab, but chicks boomerang to him a lot, when they drift because they met up with someone 'steady' but then get single again, they call him back for sex and no commit fun.

**gentleman who's only weakness is he doesn't put up with shittests. I tell him it's normal and that means they like him, and are testing him, but he does an instant n.e.x.t if it's anything more than spirited banter. that's his one weakness. I know it's awalt and part of the female vetting process, he sees it as an annoyance not worth putting up with - and his abundance gives him that choice.

when I take my non-RP business contacts and non-RP friends out with us to the pro-game/dinner/drinks, their jaws drop. it's funny to watch BP married guys see "what a lone wolf" who eats what he wants for dinner, looks like in the wild.

yes, he's real, yes it's fun to go out with him, but no, he's not common. even in the wild he's an easy 1 in a 100.

I've asked him: do you want kids/family? him: yeah, it's crossed my mind, but haven't found the right one yet. so he's not anti-anything, just picky and enjoying the best life for now.

nDoMitable · 2020-03-04T02:59:22+00:00

I’d probably think that’s prime age... peak of your career and you should have your shit together by then so why the fuck not.

redpill_scientist92 · 2020-03-04T02:49:39+00:00

A few of my uncles did this and it’s interesting to see how they turned out.

One of them ended up getting into drugs and is pushing 60 living at his dads. He works constantly and probably has some money but never got too far, has 5 duis and is a grandfather to 3. Dates 23 year old girls he most likely does hard drugs with.

The other is bitter as fuck-he was a player for years than found a woman that was way higher social status than him. He was in his 40s and had an apartment and was a liquor distributor, she owned a house with an in ground pool and had 2 kids. They dated for 5 years and he ended up getting dumped, he’s been bitter since. In his mid-50s, chills at the bar and talks shit about all of his friends ltrs, gets mad when I leave family events to go get laid.

The last one is probably the most financially successful, he’s been a player his entire life and has worked odd jobs forever. His jobs are not impressive but he’s a penny pincher and very good with money. He works and lives on a ranch and also works at a factory. On the side he does custom body work on old muscle cars. This is one of the most authentic and genuine people I’ve ever met in my life. He has an ltr that has her own place, but He has a cabin on the ranch that I’ve heard stories of him bringing women back to my entire life. I’ve heard stories of this guy bringing back my friends moms and random women from around town for as long as I can remember, and his ltr knows but stays with him. He’s also pushing 60, kind of a drunk and kind of sad, sometimes talks about how the only women he ever loved was his baby mama (they broke up 30+ years ago)

I have another uncle that I didn’t mention because he’s been married for 35 years and makes 6 figures.

If I could ever choose to live any of their lives it certainly wouldn’t be the first 2 and would most likely be the one on the ranch. But I don’t want to live any of these lifestyles. Honestly it kinda scares me, Many say having a kid and settling down isn’t redpilled but I’d like to by the time I’m 35 or 40, I don’t want to turn into these guys.

alphakari · 2020-03-04T02:59:46+00:00

A lot of partying

This isn't really fun for most men. A lot of money is lost, and the environment itself is hectic. There's a reason a lot of the guys who thrive in those environments look like losers. It just isn't a sustainable fantasy. It's the type of shit people who buy lottery tickets dream up.

into_being · 2020-03-04T00:23:44+00:00

Yes. It is easy to achieve if you are not pathetic.

The real problem going into your later years is do you actually care about the social fabric of your culture, should you raise a family instead of just running a muck.

FinancialThanks1 · 2020-03-04T00:01:52+00:00

Cientocincuenta · 2020-03-04T02:29:25+00:00

I have 2 cousins over 40 living this life. Both fuck 20 somethings all the time. Both on good paying jobs. Both jacked, confident. One bald, the other has goldie lock's curls. Both have baby mommas though.

Haytch1234 · 2020-03-04T01:23:58+00:00

My manager at work is 46. Got a partner 2 years ago and got kids with the partner.

He is originally from the US. Looks really good for his age. Before he had a partner he was dating around and having house parties all the time.

It happens. Wouldnt be surprised if he fucks other women on the side. It comes with the territory of being able to meet and fuck women.

wont_tell_i_refuse_ · 2020-03-04T03:18:45+00:00

I’d be more curious if men with this life existed who didn’t make a lot of money.

RFBComp · 2020-03-04T07:08:15+00:00

I play in high stakes home poker games in Los Angeles. 90% of the guys are 40+ recently divorced and loaded. It’s a crazy crowd to hang around beautiful women at the games a lot of booze and drugs. These guys are living like they are in college w/ money.

ThinSpiritual · 2020-03-04T02:34:32+00:00

Basically every nightlife venue on weekends in NYC lol.

2020-03-04T01:50:35+00:00

Yes, although it seems like most of them eventually do get married. They'll marry a 10 who is 20-30 years younger than them when they're in their 50s, usually.

What this says to me is that most men, even those who can have it all due to looks, money, status, do eventually get tired of gaming and decide to settle down eventually. And that's OK.

It's important to pay attention to how other men turn out as they get older. Nothing is a bigger signifier of where you're heading. This is why I don't get a vasectomy even though I feel right now like I never want to have kids. Things can change. Important to remember that.

Whitefarmer · 2020-03-04T01:43:34+00:00

Probably but the real men are raising kids with a woman that would do anything for them

disposable_me_0001 · 2020-03-04T16:09:16+00:00

Of course. If you have money, you can get women. Both Trump and Dicaprio have shown that.

frognads · 2020-03-05T06:59:48+00:00

Her husband did

RedPill_Dragon · 2020-03-04T06:03:41+00:00

1 - A lot of money--> yes

2 - A lot of partying (nightlife, clubs, events, alcohol, etc.)--> Hell no

3 - A lot of random sex with lots of different women--> LOL hahaha, no.

4 - A lot of friends who also do the first 3--> No

Basically, if you are earning a lot, then you are working to death if you are a normal person.

pilot333 · 2020-03-04T01:05:07+00:00

It’s rare but yes. 0.1% of population at best.

2020-03-04T02:22:06+00:00

[deleted]

Filmguy000 · 2020-03-04T02:23:42+00:00

Yes, but not a whole lot.

Cryptomineand69 · 2020-03-04T05:08:59+00:00

every dude in miami that actually has money

reddit_man64 · 2020-03-04T13:25:11+00:00

Dan Bilzerian?

Siyuen_Tea · 2020-03-04T15:58:56+00:00

If you did it right early. Your 30's are prime. You've got a good job with people you like and you've gone up enough to be able to do as you please.

If you want to see if it's true, go to the clubs. Go to the spring break hot spots. The younger crowd got there money from their parents. The 30's crowd is when you got it all your own.

Ime they don't have a lot of friends. The majority are more or less acquaintances that they invited and then they have there core of about 3-4 friends. There's always someone who wants to go out, so you keep a large group so you never go alone.

They call those acquaintances friends but the average person doesn't as they feel like they need to know more about a person to call them that.

GayLubeOil · 2020-03-04T16:00:34+00:00

A lot of men in this position are using the power of the dollar relative to other currencies to live this kind of life abroad.

So basically expats in a place like Thailand.

The lifestyle your describing requires a lot of free time and a lot of money and relative good health things that are usually mutually exclusive.

Title	Are there older men (30+) in the United States who actually are bachelors and live this kind of life?
Author	highighhopes
Upvotes	72
Comments	86
Date	03 March 2020 11:53 PM UTC (12 months ago)
Subreddit	askTRP
Link	https://theredarchive.com/post/352275
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/fd40d9/are_there_older_men_30_in_the_united_states_who/