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/r/askTRP RPEC Advice AMA Megathread - Ask Away!

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March 4, 2020
57 upvotes

Welcome all. This thread will officially begin at 9am PST / 12pm EST but I'm posting it early so people can start getting questions in before RPECs answer.

Feel free to ask for direct advice for the situation you're in, or any general red pill questions you may have.

Our RPEC team will be stopping in over the next two days to answer as many questions as we can.

From beginner questions all the way to advanced theory, sky's the limit.

Due to the schedule of some of our RPEC team, the thread will be live for two full days as different members sift in and answer as much as they can.


Post Information
Title /r/askTRP RPEC Advice AMA Megathread - Ask Away!
Author redpillschool
Upvotes 57
Comments 282
Date 04 March 2020 02:29 PM UTC (6 months ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/352403
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/fddrw1/rasktrp_rpec_advice_ama_megathread_ask_away/
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Comments

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children) | Copy

Stay on topic or your post will be removed.

If you missed your chance during the thread, we do a similar thing on Sunday mornings on the official TRP Youtube channel at 10AM EST.

[–]mrkinix9 points10 points  (20 children) | Copy

How to be more dominant with girls and make them submit/obey me?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt25 points26 points  (2 children) | Copy

Frame. Unshakable rock solid frame. Having a physically strong build goes a long way towards improving this.

And it's not about them submitting/obeying, it's also about finding women who are submissive in the first place. IF that's the kind of women you like then you first have to have solid frame as I stated, but also screen for women who are submissive. One thing that suprised me was running into women who were submissive before I was ready for it. I wasn't nearly dominant enough back then.

[–]Bottlecapper2252 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

How can one develop unshakable frame? Please give vivid details if possible.

[–]Senior Endorsedmax_peenor15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

Make decisions for them. They are asking you to do it all the time, but you almost always miss them. And when they balk at your decision you give in to them immediately. I'm not saying women shouldn't ever make decisions. I'm saying there are a fuckton of times they want YOU to do it and you aren't.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp8 points9 points  (7 children) | Copy

The only way a girl is going to submit sexually is if she finds you attractive and wants your D and attention. The question is, do women want your D and your attention in general?

Forget about her "obeying" you. This BP thinking of someone who demands she does xyz. Instead ask "does she want to please me?"

I'm assuming you're talking about LTR/gf/wife not random girl you met 10 mins ago or matched on tinder.

[–]mrkinix6 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy

One thing I observed, is that women want my D and find me attractive when they first see me. But after they get to know me, they no longer do, they want to make me an orbiter.

I handle shit tests, don't give free validation etc... but my gut tells me that I need to be more aggressive and dominant with them. I don't know how I got this thought, but I feel that women expect me to be dominant with them from the beginning and spank the sh*t out of them.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy

It's because you default to provider/needy/overinvested over time because it was your default mode. TRP comes in stages, work on your maintenance game. It's actually the easy part, you've got all the hard stuff done if you can seduce and fuck

[–]mrkinix6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

How to work on my maintenance game?

I admit deep down I'm a little bit needy, and I try to hide that by being some sort of an asshole. Like the nicest thing I could do for a girl is just give her some attention and laugh at what she says.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

You answered yourself. The cure for neediness is personal security - get on it.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

but I feel that women expect me to be dominant with them from the beginning and spank the sh*t out of them.

Yes.

But after they get to know me, they no longer do, they want to make me an orbiter.

Show sexual intent and don't get shut down if she shit tests by shutting it down. If she persists in that, next her, you're being gamed.

Don't show provider traits. Always split, don't talk about your money, don't show it off, if you have classic high paying job (layer, CEO etc) don't mention it and treat her probing (they always do) as shit test.

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Read my posts under "CorporateLand" on the AskTRP sidebar about submissive women and BDSM.

[–]RStonePT6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you don't believe it, they won't either.

Like others have already said, frame, irreverence, charisma, charm, and physicality and status.

It has to come naturally, men aren't able to decieve well enough to hide all our 'tells'

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Submission and obedience are compliance. Compliance is temporary. Dictators only have control until the fear wears off, then they are assassinated or abandoned.

Have you heard the adage about horses and water? The purpose of TRP is to be the type of leader that garners consensual followers, with consent being the important part there.

Being a slave driver is a stupid ambition.

[–]dadfrombrad1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don’t let them have a say. She says let’s go to the movies today you say “No we’re going tomorrow remember?” *you basically just make the call 24/7. *

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Why would you want a woman who doesn't?

[–]mrkinix0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

How to find one?

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just a function of the number of approaches and ultimately lays.

[–]Banana_Writes0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think you can only do that by choosing women who are already submissive. If you find someone older, confident and self-assured you’ll have a harder time.

[–]RogueSteven8 points9 points  (10 children) | Copy

What unconventional things have you guys noticed that give women "tingles"? Whether in the bedroom or forms of kino and/or things you say to them

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt25 points26 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don't know if it's unconventional, but it was certainly a surprise the first time it happened to me...

Being non-reactive to chaos happening at that moment in time. Was part a minor car accident and one of the women with me who I later banged that night pointed out she wasn't sure about me at first and thought I was kind of a douchebag (playful shit test) since that was the first day we met. When things went down and I was calm as a cucumber, aka stoic, as if nothing had happened...she had an immediate :sploosh: moment for me and knew right then she was going to fuck me that night.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten25 points26 points  (0 children) | Copy

Vulgar displays of power will always get one or two pussies in the room wet. Story time:

I am in one of my favorite bars in NYC a few years ago. I get the urge to piss, so I check the one bathroom (kind of a dive). Occupied. Fine. I fuck around for 5 minutes. Still occupied. 5 more pass. Occupied. I gently knock. Nothing.

Immediately, because I lived in Brooklyn for more than 5 seconds, I know something is up. Having put a heroin overdose loser in the dionysus position and called 911 before, I am acting somewhat altruistic in my next action (just kidding, I am protecting the bar owner).

I do the "cop knock" on the door after 15 seconds. For those unfamiliar, that's a side arm, full power, WHAM WHAM WHAM OPEN THE FUCK UP knock. The leader of a group of sniveling betas playing a board game near the door immediately protests in a faggy voice about how what I did was "so uncaaalled for". Ignored. Within 10 seconds of the cop knock, a shaved head, rat-faced, tattooed and unkempt little shit comes scurrying out. I tell king beta, "see?"

I play nice. "Hey man, I was worried, you OK in there?" Rat stutters and mumbles nonsense. I can smell the burn of cheap metal. Probably his spoon. I tell rat fuck, "Sorry about that, let me get you a drink..." and motion him over to the bar with me. I ask Guillermo the barman if the guy has a tab. Nope. Rat understands the situation and scurries out of the bar.

A girl immediately comes up to me and thanks me, because she'd also been waiting ungodly long to use the bathroom. I tell her I am going to check it out for her first. I didn't find anything, so I told her all clear. When she got back to the bar, I could practically feel the humidity emanating from her pussy. She got too drunk, so I left her there shortly thereafter, but we fucked on-again-off-again for a few months after that.


The shorter story is I have never met one, not one woman who didn't enjoy being lightly choked during sex. Literally not a single one. Now, they don't all want "make me feel like you're about to kill me" choking, but they all want some version of it, and come back for more after you do it.

[–]redpillbanana7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

Beating up another man in front of her is likely to give her tingles, even if it is her boyfriend that is on the receiving end.

I used to know a guy who was an amateur Muay Thai fighter. He said that once you get experience, the pain from fighting is not so bad, but on the plus side there was no shortage of women.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Your tag is missing?

[–]redpillbanana6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think a few of us are missing our tag on this subreddit. No big deal, our advice will stand on its own merit.

[–]RStonePT5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

  1. Treating a girl with disdain

  2. Jealousy

  3. Choking

  4. Spanking

I lost a plate once by asking why she put up with me doing 1. She lost the illusion and we drifted off shortly thereafter. The attraction comes first though, but afterwards, these were my mind blows

[–]RogueSteven0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Jealously as in slyly making her jealous? Not overtly making it known you have options etc?

[–]RStonePT5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

As in:

If you're a charming, attractive, charismatic man with options who is outgoing a byproduct is that other women will be receptive to you, which the woman your with notices and starts to get jealous or mate-guard.

It's basic pre selection

[–]dadfrombrad1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

hand over her throat gently while kissing

[–]OverSentient6 points7 points  (23 children) | Copy

Whats the best way to practice outer game for a beginner?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt21 points22 points  (9 children) | Copy

Step 0. FIX YOUR DAMN PERSONAL HYGIENE. Take a shower, brush your teeth, iron your clothes. You know, the basics. Don't stink when you go out trying to talk to people.

Step 1. Have a plan. When you go out to cold approach it helps out massively to have an 2 or 3 openers in the tank so you don't go blank when you are brand new. Practice them in front of the mirror or record yourself so you can see your non-verbals like your posture and visual cues you might be sending. Also rehearse in the car or in the shower when you have downtime so you know what you're going to say, and how to say it so you avoid verbal pauses and the like.

Step 2. Go out and talk to people. Friends, family, and hired guns don't count. You have to cold approach people who are strangers. Use the 1 second rule: when you see a woman you like, don't wait. Don't think. Just beat feet and start walking over. If you did Step 1 then you already know what your'e going to say.
Try to get 30 minutes of face time each and every day if at all possible. Don't bail on the approach unless they leave or they tell you to leave.

Step 3. Learn from your mistakes. When an interaction goes south, next time replay things in your mind and envision where things went wrong. Now visualize a change and try to anticipate where things will go in the future. later, rinse, repeat. The more experience you get actually talking to people, the more refined and better you'll be at anticipating on how things will unfold.

Step 4. Have a reason to close. Once you start seeing trends, now it's time to start guiding them in a direction of your choosing. Setting up events so you have a reason to close them is a good example of this. Too many guys go for a number, but haven't established any reason why the women should link up with them later on.
One thing I recommend is hosting an event once a month. This could be a party, event at a venue, whatever. Start inviting women to these events and you'll be stocking the pond where you're the big fish at these events. This is how you can artificially build up status in the short-term.

[–]BodomDeth0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

hosting an event once a month

how do you do that naturally? you just make parties at your place and invite random chicks?

as for venues, that seems better but what exactly can you do? stand up comedy? quiz nights?

[–]OverSentient-1 points0 points  (7 children) | Copy

Could you please tell us what your openers are?

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your opener is "hi" until you can say high to anybody and not feel uncomfortable about it. If saying "hi" is comfortable, you're opener is "hi my name is...".

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt5 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy

No. What works for me won't work for you. Especially if you haven't going through the process. Most guys start okayish, get worse with structured game, then get good again. Eventually you end up better than you started once you come full circle. That's the general trend when guys learn game.

You need to go through the process of learning direct and indirect openers to figure out which works best for your own personality. That being said, keep it simple stupid and try the basics first. Often times simple is better. "Hi, I'm OverSentient."

[–]MasculineRP2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Most guys start okayish, get worse with structured game, then get good again.

Glad you said that, felt like I've taken a step back since learning game. Slowly getting better.

[–]mrpoopistan2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Think of it as the way athletes level up as they go through their careers.

Look at professional baseball pitchers. Every step they move up feels like a setback because they're getting good enough at the game to play at a higher level. Going from AAA to MLB is pretty much an invitation to get hit hard, and lots of guys get bounced back to AAA a few times before they stick in the majors.

Progress rarely comes without setbacks. If you lift, there's going to be a day where you screw up a muscle or a joint. You may even have a body part that dogs you endlessly (my left elbow), and then you'll have to adapt your routine. You'll probably be set back long enough that you'll have to build back up once everything heals.

It happens. It's just part of the progression.

[–]throwaway0292dh0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Most guys start okayish, get worse with structured game, then get good again.

Dunning-Kruger effect in action?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

No, most guys are actually pretty decent naturally believe it or not. They get worse because structured game is weird and unnatural. They get better again as they get acclimated to being social, reading people's verbal and non-verbal cues, and so on, and start being more natural again only relying on structured game when they hit roadblocks.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp17 points18 points  (10 children) | Copy

Meta rules: Incremental repetition>Taking notes and looking for patterns>Making adjustments as necessary.

Practical application:

  1. Start small. Instead going directly to the club, take additional 20 mins to walk there on foot, say "hi" to every person you meet. Next week add "hi my name is". Then add more things. This is called warmup and it works miracles.

  2. Set goals each time you go out. Open 5 sets, get 5 numbers, get a kiss close, move 3 different girls from one spot to another. And so on. Start with small, easy ones.

  3. Take notes, literally. Phone/sheet of paper and write things you noticed. Do it just after you finished your night, otherwise you'll forget half of things, especially if you drink. What did I do wrong? What did I do right? What's next? What to leave, what to change? Whatever else comes to mind.

  4. After you enter the club first thing you do is opening a set, not getting a drink. You gained momentum during the warmup, why waste it and start chilling with drink. Today you're here to practice game not chill, you can always chill another day.

  5. Once the set is over (you got rejected or got a goal), open another set ASAP. The key is keeping the momentum so you don't go into analytical mode, so you don't go inside your head.

  6. Escalate. From being social, to being funny, to flirting, to innuendos, to isolation, to date, to your place, to sex.

  7. Start being physical from get to. Start small and escalate. Shake her hand, high five, spin, hold her hand, hand on shoulders or hip and so on.

 

Expect rejections, learn to love it, relish in it. Until you get rejected by 100 girls/sets you haven't got rejected at all. After 100 it won't even register just "oh well another set".

Expect social pressure, especially from your peers. "Why are you behaving like this? Can't you just chill and talk with us? She's gonna reject you anyway. Are you a player?" Ignore the subject until they get it, if they don't ditch them, you don't need cockblocks from someone that should be rooting for you.

Expect bad nights. You can't be happy and have fun 24/7/365. Go through the motions anyway, it usually helps to change your mood.

Expect to have sex. Learning game is a numbers game.

 

First and foremost: have fun with the process of learning the game. It's not going to be a chore b/c you're flirting with girls, you simply add some new elements to it. If you feel like it's a chore, review your goals and set ones you're gonna enjoy doing. Don't mistake a chore with having approach anxiety or being afraid to escalate b/c you might lose the girl if you do.

[–]empatheticapathetic1 point2 points  (8 children) | Copy

Do you think rejections now are worse than they used to be, because of where we are as a culture? I got accused of harassment a couple years ago at a big event and I was literally being lambasted in the street by random people over it. Since then my game has become a lot more covert to prevent that from happening again. I can’t imagine opening set after set in a bar after getting rejected.

I went to an event at a bar a few weeks ago with a RP bro and I gave him some openers I didn’t have the balls to say. He did one, got a harsh reaction and for the rest of the night the people in the bar were passing notes about this ‘creep’ who hit on them, even though this guy for all intents and purposes is ‘Chad’. Every time he went to the bathroom I just heard women shitting on him and simps getting angry about it.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy

Was the Chad the center of the party/fun before? Did you guys have some form of social proof, at least by looking like you have fun? What were the openers? How did he deliver? And so on.

In short, either he wasn't perceived as attractive as you give him the credit, he half-assed the opener (didn't feel congruent) and thus was clearly looking like reading a script or the opener was "i want to eat your mom's corpse ass" retarded.

If you're often getting called out that you're running game go back to the drawing board and see what's common in these situations. Most likely you're not: having fun, relaxed, confident. Less likely: too much pressure on going through the routine, too much escalation/too aggressive/to fast escalation. Also: don't do shotgun approaches on daygame and social events. Nightclubs are much more chaotic and thus much more safe from that perspective.

[–]empatheticapathetic0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

In this instance it was Chad, me and another dude just hanging out in a pocket of the bar. There was a woman painfully dressed from head to toe in obnoxious red and i said to Chad to go over and say "Hey i'm on my period too" which is kind of a retarded opener. He went over and confidently said that because he's Chad. He got harsh looks from her and then she went to her friends who all stared him out. He opened another girl later to some success by making some reference to the fact she looked like Lady Gaga. But later on there was all this communication between different people in the bar saying the Chad guy had been harassing that girl and simps getting way too angry about it to impress their female counterparts.

Chad is 6'4 and just very confident and good looking. Does great with girls usually but girls usually open him. My question was more about this 'harassment' phenomenon. In my instance nearly 2 years ago I was not trying to pick up the girl as i never usually am, i was just having a good time with my bros and made some funny chat here and there when i saw her, she was selling merch. Later on she caused a big ruckus telling the bouncers i was harassing her and i was banned from the venue while i saw her laughing about it safely behind the bouncers. Then girls in the street who didn't even know me started making up supporting stories. This was right in the middle of 'metoo'.

Both events were rock shows.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

My question was more about this 'harassment' phenomenon.

You do approaches for approaches sake, you do more of them in a week than most men do in a decade, you do them every week. There's always an increased risk of some girl/whiteknight getting angry. When it comes to approaching, metoo only increased the the risk, didn't caused it, so calibrate b/c it's on you not on her and that's b/c it's you who want to approach. I "burned" my hometown to the point that I was recognized as "that guy who seduces women" and that wasn't uncommon for PUAs who stuck with it. The upside was, you got into every nightclub b/c you always had girls on you. Multiply this by 3 for you and your friends. There's risk, there's reward.

The best "defence" is for her to want you to approach. Be attractive, look like you're having fun, make her want to belong there, use a pivot for social proof. There's nothing clever you can do about that to be safe 100% of the time. Sometimes shit happens beyond your control and that's it.

 

For the "red dress" situation you mentioned your opener was poorly chosen. The problem is you thought the opener is "shocking but funny". For her the opener was "WTF did you just say to me?", hence the reaction. It's possible she took it as lowering her value (accusation), that's my first bet.

If you want to be funny, make sure the context is funny so she gets its a joke. "You're stealing my fashion style girl, I wear red dresses too...mostly on my period". Weak comedy, but it illustrates the context thing.

she was selling merch

She was a hired gun who thought you were gaming her. She had "high" status, a role of importance in the context of the venue and interacting with you lowered her (personally perceived) status. Hence you're the creep b/c otherwise she's low value slut who sleeps with low value creeps.

made some funny chat here and there

Maybe it the same situation as with "red dress" opener, you thought it was funny, she didn't but had to be polite about it b/c maybe she'll sell you the merch if she laughs.

[–]stenay0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You do approaches for approaches sake, you do more of them in a week than most men do in a decade, you do them every week. There's always an increased risk of some girl/whiteknight getting angry.

How many approaches per week is too much? is 30 per week too much? How about 10 ?

I "burned" my hometown to the point that I was recognized as "that guy who seduces women" and that wasn't uncommon for PUAs who stuck with it.

Thats somethign I am afraid of. Whats a solution to this problem? Would you reccomend moving to a new city every week? When can you return back to the same city?

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

How many approaches per week is too much? is 30 per week too much? How about 10 ?

There is no exact number. It's like with practicing anything else, the more you practice the better you get. 30 per week is 3 nights with 10 opens. If all you can do is say "hi" and you get rejected after 5 minutes, doing 10 "hi" approaches will take you an hour or so. Is 3 hours a week worth it or not is up to you.

Thats somethign I am afraid of. Whats a solution to this problem?

If you're dedicated, it's something you have to accept will happen b/c it happened to people before, especially in a small town, compounded by the fact that you're saying really stupid lines, to every decent girl you see. Classic newbie problem "how do I learn game if I live in a small town?" is solved by "move to a big city".

[–]stenay0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I got accused of harassment a couple years ago at a big event and I was literally being lambasted in the street by random people over it.

My worse nightmare. What openers were you using and why were you accused of harrasment? you were just trying to get a girls number right?

I went to an event at a bar a few weeks ago with a RP bro and I gave him some openers I didn’t have the balls to say. He did one, got a harsh reaction and for the rest of the night the people in the bar were passing notes about this ‘creep’ who hit on them, even though this guy for all intents and purposes is ‘Chad’. Every time he went to the bathroom I just heard women shitting on him and simps getting angry about it.

Again one of my nightmares. I am afraid of getting the reputation of a "creep"

[–]empatheticapathetic0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I explained the situation more in my subsequent comments to that one. I wasn't even trying to get her number, just trying to have fun.

[–]1DubbleFUPAwitCheez0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is exactly how I try to approach this whole thing. I have been a proponent of "warming up" to gain momentum for a while now and been giving that advice around here.

Also, sometimes you do in fact get lucky and you go up to that chick that's been eyeballing you all night and she makes it the easiest thing you've ever done but it won't happen if you're in the corner stuck in your head. Even a race car doesn't start at 200 mph, get that ball rolling.

[–]RStonePT1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Adding to BSUTAN, once you have the human being level of shit together, the problem is never 'not enough information' but 'not enough action'

Pick a system, any system and go fuck it up a few dozen time. I'm of the mindset that it's really not important whether you do london daygame, DayBang, or even a daytime version of M3, just that you have some plan going in that has worked in the past.

[–][deleted]  (14 children) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 24 points25 points  (13 children) | Copy

Get sleep, quit porn, stop drinking / drugs, get exercise.

[–]empatheticapathetic4 points5 points  (12 children) | Copy

All these are staples in my life for a long time.

[–]Modredpillschool[S] 19 points20 points  (11 children) | Copy

consult doctor.

[–]empatheticapathetic1 point2 points  (10 children) | Copy

Yeah I done the whole thing. Got nowhere. Dunno where to go now. Thought i'd just throw the question out there anyway.

[–]Senior Contributoradam-l7 points8 points  (9 children) | Copy

Here's an excerpt from Herb Goldberg's The Hazards of Being Male, chapter 3. The Wisdom of the Penis, might help:

So-called primary impotence, which means never being able to get an erection, is considered extremely rare and will not be considered here. The vast majority of men are of course capable of becoming erect under certain conditions and with certain women. So-called impotence is almost always a pair-specific phenomenon, that may be making a powerful statement about the man's feelings about the relationship toward the particular woman he is in bed with. Ironic as it may seem, most men, would rather feel they have a medical problem than say very simply to their intimate, "I don't want to make love to you." In other words, acknowledging impotence and claiming, "I've got a problem," is easier than expressing the feeling, "I'm not turned on by you." Therefore, instead of seeing himself as impotent, I would encourage him to say "I don't want to have sex with you." I would have him translate "premature ejaculation" into, "I want to get this over with as fast as possible." I would encourage him to explore and understand his negative responses to the particular woman or situation rather than assume the burden and then try to overcome the "symptom."

My clinical experience indicates that the man who diagnoses himself as impotent is often experiencing something within his relationship or about his partner that is killing his desire. However, the feeling message is only being telegraphed by his body response and is not being recognized in his conscious brain.

[–][deleted]  (8 children) | Copy

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[–]Senior Contributoradam-l1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

I have a close friend that had an issue like that. He managed to overcome it with help from a patient steady girlfriend. These are hard to come by, nowadays.

It's possible that a capable prostitute could be a better investment than a BP psychologist.

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy

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[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Have you gotten sildenafil / viagra? Insanely easy, all online. I know lots of dudes whose junk actually worked fine but they needed the rocket fuel to get over their extreme sexual anxiety issues.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

talking to a therapist once a week about it but his largely bluepill philosophy just causes us to end up in a stalemate.

Switch therapists and keep doing so until you meet one you connect with. The profession of psychology isn't immune to practitioners who are burned out, incompetent, coasting for a paycheck, fighting their own demons by proxy, or too biased to relate well to you.

As for the erectile dysfunction, see a urologist or other relevant M.D. to rule out organic problems.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy

[deleted]

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Good luck getting back in the game, my man.

[–]Jaggarojo7 points8 points  (67 children) | Copy

This is not really about theory, but more about the interpretation and the weight attributed to some of the theory. I am aware that experience will mostly dictate what one will say. Though I mostly understand the rationale behind our 30+ y-o bachelor ECs who prefer open relationships and spinning plates (notably Fereally, itswr1tten, Vasya, etc.), I get lost whenever I try to understand u/GayLubeOil's perspective.

Take my upcoming paragraph with a grain of salt because I'm fully aware that I might be just too stupid to understand him. I draw much of my observations from https://www.trp.red/feed/.

From what I've seen, GLO prefers a much more philosophy-oriented approach. That underneath the blue-pill there are the other actors in play, notably feminism, tradconism, etc. and that unplugging from the blue pill means unplugging from those other establishments. That there is "an absolutism" in being red pilled. Assuming that it's true, I don't really understand how it can benefit us. The research fields in social sciences all have a bunch of compelling theories that states the tendencies that normal behavior will follow. But, as a simple example, a "risk-free asset" is 99.99% safe; the odds of a whole government collapsing is next to none. But reality is, there's always a possibility.

When the bachelor ECs apply their input based on experience, we newbies get amazed at what becomes possible. Some get discouraged at the amount of work one must put in and stay on this sub because they want to assimilate 100% of the theory and not make mistakes. I am still somewhat like that, although I spend more time off this sub now. Some others though, they get thrilled! They like the challenge. And that's one of the greatnesses that the Red Pill has to offer: that we get the opportunity to experience our lives to the fullest because we get to see past the numbers.

I recently read Pook, and even he said that intellectualizing everything meant that one completely removes the beauty behind the unfolding of human experiences. That message really stuck with me, because when I grew attached to an outcome, I always tried to compartmentalize the emotions from the rational and approached the situation like solving for 1+1. Of course it rarely worked, and even if it did, it wasn't fun.

My question isn't specifically designated for GLO, it's also for any other EC/mod who share similar thought processes. Those who, in the face of advice-seeking, prefer to talk about abstract concepts rather than sharing their own personal experience on the matter.

Under what circumstances and/or what rationale did you deem it preferable to operate this way?

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil25 points26 points  (32 children) | Copy

My perspective is a relatively simple one. Society is falling into a darker and darker abyss every generation. At the forefront of this abyss are Americans. Americans are degenerate Europeans. They can't read as well as Europeans, can't write as well, speak their language with a lower breadth of words, are averse to theory and as a rule are adhd attention span pragmatards.

How Do I get girls! How Do I get girls! How Do I get girls! How Do I get girls?

The don't want to think. They want a solution now, like a hamburger at a drive through. Most cultures eat and discuss things at the dinner table. The American kitchen the drive through is the culinary equivalent of a glory holes.

Three generations ago if you were a teenager growing up in Russia you were expected to read and comprehend Das Kapital, if you were in Germany you had to read small mustache man. This isn't a political point but a point on reading comprehension. What percentage of the Red Pill userbase could read and comprehend those books? Very few!

They have been reduced from thinking and acting like fully formed adults to wanting simplistic solutions like a child. Mommy what do I do! Tell me the answer mommy!

My position is that unplugging is functioning physically and Intellectually as an adult man Sex is a consequence of being a fully formed man. It's therefore not a surprise that the eternal children have problem getting laid.

Therefore when someone is "Red Pilled" he has been taken out of the eternal kindergarten that is Liberal society and is able to use his strength to dictate terms. I know that this is a very broad totalizing definition and most Americans are not used to thinking in such a way.

But my ultimate goal is to pull Americans out of their amerimut-ism and help them become Europeans again. Indians/Muslims/Asians have a stronger grasp of their culture and traditions, don't have an aversion to thinking and are thus much easier to restore to full Intellectual functioning.

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper12 points13 points  (8 children) | Copy

The great shibboleth of the intellectual class is the persistent delusion that there is such a thing as a general education, which somehow makes a person smarter and more qualified to comment on anything, from how to ideally implement failed 19th century economic theories to what popular film reveals about the collective personality of nations, from how best to grow wheat crops with high yield to the geopolitics of the Asian subcontinent.

They will angrily insist that some abstract intellectual exercise, for instance chess, develops the abilities of the mind. Well, of course it does. It develops the ability of the mind to play chess.

Empirical observation has never shown us that this translates into any sort of general benefit. (And it is empirical observation, not theoretical reasoning, which actually helps us understand shit).

So lamentation of the fact that modern teenagers would rather learn to program a computer than read Mein Kampf is, at best, a crypto-luddite sentiment. It may be unwelcome to their elders that the behaviour of android phones is more relevant to their lives than fascism in particular, or the cultural heritage of their dead relatives in general, but I assure you this will impede them not one whit.

  • People with adequate nutrition and non-abusive parents are precisely as smart as they were born capable of being. Books will not change this.
  • People turn their intelligence towards that which is most relevant to the comfort and prosperity of their daily lives.
  • Anyone who believes that debugging multithreaded code, or repairing the modern automobile engine, truly requires less marbles than scribbling eloquent poetry, or writing works of philosophical musings, is in for a rude shock should he ever choose to truly leave his comfort zone.
  • Society, and its characteristics, are an emergent property. The implications of this should be obvious to anyone who understands about emergent properties.

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy

Today the great Whisper has declared with utmost confidence and heavy handed uses of thesaurus that all skills are non-transferable. We must therefore hyper specialize in specific skills like Santa's neurotic workshop gnomes.

Lifting weights at the gym, well that's only for SMV. There is no way that lifting weights could help someone develop a higher capacity to endure stress in general life. Every modality is confined to it's specific context and cannot be used outside if it.

Obviously reading difficult books does not increase general reading comprehension which can not be transferred into general conversational skills

Also philosphy is just stupid Intellectual masterbation. It's not like Lenin successfully weaponized Marxism to take over a country. It's not like Mein Kampf was written on the foundation of Nietzche to achieve a practical end. Oh and Goebbels philosphy degree had no use in his function of propaganda minister.

Isn't being an EC similar to running a Propaganda Ministry? Apparently not. It's actually about writing practical workplace manuals but for the bedroom.

Reading how people manipulated other people throughout history is pointless because in no way can it teach us how to manipulate people today. This is backwards Luddite thinking according to Whisper.

Also according to Whisper all ability is imminent. Someone is either born with it or not. It's not like a person is born into a certain potentiality which he can then work to achieve the highest range of.

One of the problems with hyper specialized wage labour is that it disciplines people into thinking along very specific narrow lines. Sure they might have a nice salary, however that salary comes at the cost of being physically and mentally inside the wage cage.

Thus we see truths that are immanent to programming such as the non transferability of programing certifications misapplied to the general functioning of life.

[–]BurnoTaurus2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

So you're just going to completely deny the concept of transferrable skills, and you're also going to denounce the human capacity to gain knowledge? What the absolute fuck.

"People turn their intelligence to that which is most relevant to the comfort and prosperity of their daily lives"

Excellent, and the pursuit of higher intelligence is somehow antithetical to this?

[–]1XXXMersenne0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

A suffcient general enduaction would equip one with the knowledge, understanding & skills to adequately engage in life & its affairs. Your delusion, seems to be that this general education is an intellectual pussy pass for dhiarretic virtue signalling. Prerequisite certification is unnecessary if someone can productively “comment on anything” with discourse at the same+ level; certification just expédiantes the vetting process.

Your chess analogy, focusing on the objectification of the process doesn’t account for the process itself. Is not the pattern recognition faculty exercised in playing chess indentical to that of compiling an algorithm? You begin at the end and continually reverse engineer the desired outcome as factors & variables change. It could even be argued that chess is a more complex version of this as your intelligent, dynamic opponent makes your reverse engineering more improvisational compared to linear programming (where obstacles are often predetermined & thus removed sequentially).

  • For your first bullet, read Freud. You can have a healthy wholesome upbringing but if you can’t shitswiththedooropen you develop anal-retentive tendencies that will bottleneck the ability to be as smart as born capable of being.

  • What to turn intellect to once comfort & prosperity of daily life has been assured? ”War is a way of shattering to pieces, or pouring into the stratosphere, or sinking into the depths of the sea, materials which might otherwise be used to make the masses too comfortable, and hence, in the long run, too intelligent.”

  • Debug is tricky, yes. Philosophy in this context would be the questions asked at the django development meets because why just have RoR?

  • I don’t have a grasp on emergent properties but sounds like society & it’s discontents.

[–]notWhatIsTheEnd0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

What is the source of your quotation concerning war?

[–]1XXXMersenne0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I have no idea, copy & paste into google or something

[–]dulkemaru510 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Empirical observation has shown that suicidal people who find empowering worldviews, like God, can become happy and eager to continue living, only more euphorically, ambitiously, and confidently.

Empirical observation has also shown that autistic incels who learn chess can become rich G-Star models.

... It seems as if the meaning(s) of "general benefit" is causing the disparity in conclusions here.

[–]AthanasiusDjango-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I am editing my post to make clearer what I implied with my previous irony.

You firstly try to devalue the reading of philosophical works by constructing a fictional puppet who has opinions on the implementation of economic theory, Asian geopolitics and high yield agriculture. You then tell us that your construct puppet is also a fanatical proponent of chess who looks down on software coding as inferior to chess.

Once you have constructed the puppet you are about to shit on you write a paragraph where you tell us that your bully chess champion Pinocchio is not a caricature you made up from anecdotal evidence but the product of empirical investigation. Now, when it comes to investigations - empirical or scientific- there has to be an articulated and documented process you followed to gather the components which led you to these empirical observations. I say your Pinnochio who bullies python coders is bullshit and I challenge you to detail the process you used to gather the evidence suggesting it is true.

The last part is a bullet point list of you beating the puppet construct you made with a stick and admiring yourself for the high achievement of doing so.

Given that your post is a reply to Gaylubeoil, I assume that the equivalent would have been of stepping in the ring against him with a blow up doll, kicking the shit out of the blow up doll without even looking at him, counting to 10 whilst the deflated blow up doll is in the ground and then declaring yourself the winner against Gaylubeoil.

In TLDR, you basically just replied by constructing a strawman and then beating it. Instead, I urge you to take what you think the questions are that your blow up doll would answer wrong and then ask them to Gaylubeoil directly. Cheers

[–]therealbigoso2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

What about women? Most adult women I know between 23 - 40 still see dating the same way they experienced it in college. - if they want a ONS, they go to bars and clubs and get drunk (like at house parties in college) - the men they date are either their own age or at most 3 years older (like freshmen women dating senior men) - if they want an LTR, they look no further than their work circle (similar to dating people in your classes)

You say the American male is a defective European and a man child, but have you really assessed the American woman?

If you asked me, it would appear that Americans in general are trying to relive the glory years. Men in that their lives were best as children when they were taken care of by mommy. And women are still remembering how things were when they attended college.

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

American women are just as fucked as American men and for the same reasons

[–]Jaggarojo1 point2 points  (14 children) | Copy

My takeaway is that you've unfucked yourself to the point where you decided it was relevant to help others unfuck themselves too. And that your preferred method of instruction is deeply tied to your beliefs of how the American system should be relative to the European model.

I've personally never set foot on the European continent, nor read any of its literature, so I cannot relate at all. So I can't really assess Europe's "red pill level", though I will keep your perspective in mind when I eventually do decide to travel there.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt6 points7 points  (11 children) | Copy

I've personally never set foot on the European continent, nor read any of its literature, so I cannot relate at all. So I can't really assess Europe's "red pill level", though I will keep your perspective in mind when I eventually do decide to travel there.

I lived over there for years. The women are faster than in the US, the Brit guys tend to be stuffier and more reserved--they talk a big game and sound cultured lke what GLO is getting at, but in reality the whole continent is cucked to no end. It's what the end-game of feminism looks like when the guys give in to the women. As we all know, giving in to women's demands largely turns the women off (the guys aren't a challenge and fell into the women's frame on a grand scale), which is in large part why the women are gleefully happy with the importing of a new crop of dominant men (migrants) to start the cycle anew.

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy

[removed]

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

Honestly I was more comfortable around Europeans than Americans most of the time. There's something unique about American sensibilities that didn't jive with how I experienced the sensibilities of croats, brits, greeks, frenchies, spaniards or slavs IMHO

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Americans are definitely louder, crass, and rambunctious, especially when booze is involved. The "ugly American" stereotype exists for a reason. Basically Americans are obnoxious compared to our European counterparts.

One group that rivals Americas are those from reserved Asian cultures (eg China). In my experience, when they hit the West they let loose and treat the rules as merely suggestions. I saw it everywhere from New Zealand to Berlin. They'll nod and say sorry when called out, but would go right back to breaking the rules. Skipping lines, ignoring instructions on tours, you name it. Best guess... coming from a part of the world where they're oppressed and finally having some freedom they feel they can break the rules as any punishment won't compare to what they would suffer back home so it's no big deal. That's my hypothesis anyway.

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

It's not even that, I'm loud, australians are crass, and both of us can hold liquor better than any american I've met. And it's mostly women. rural US, if anything, was uncomfortably kind IMO

Best I've been able to put it was a certain detachment from everywhere else. Everyone kind of knows a bit about everyone else, except america, and it's off putting for a first impression.

I mean give it time and that goes away, but it does make for awkward meetings. I noticed the same in asia, but most people there were overly polite so it was largely on me to play it safe until we would get comfortable enough

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Everyone kind of knows a bit about everyone else, except america

lol, true. It's a bit of a superiority complex because we've got the bomb, so everyone else doesn't matter unless we actually want to know something about you. Other cultures get that education by default so everyone knows a little about a lot more than we get in the US. We're assholes and proud of it :)

This really does sum it up the American identity...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrgpZ0fUixs

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I will come back when San Diego rebuilds the Kansas City Barbequeue with the original piano

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Kansas City Barbequeue

If you ever come to the DC/Baltimore region we've got a great place called Mission BBQ. Highly recommend it. There's another one called Urban BBQ that's pretty decent too.

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

[–]Jaggarojo4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I agreed with most of the content in the video until he slapped a political label on the unapologetic man. I'm not at the point in my life where I deem society worth saving, especially since I haven't even saved myseld yet. Those who simply do not give a shit about Leftist values can benefit from not hearing that noise at all, and that's the temporary solution I've chosen to deal with all that crap.

I do however understand much more after your exchanges with u/bsutansalt. Thanks for the input. Cheers to both.

[–]1DubbleFUPAwitCheez0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

What do you think of the cucking of europe and its opening of borders to allow these proud cultural ideals to be trampled? Are they not just as bad? Or are you using purely a previous generation of europeans not corrupted by the current female-centric culture as your example? If so why not use the more wholesome previous culture of America? Too simple? I wouldn't say not educated enough as America during the time was the scientific leader of the world.

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I don't consider the European Union to be Europe, I view it as an Anti Europe or United States of Europe. Is a man wearing a dress a man? No. The obesity and Feminism common in parts of Western Europe is just the Americanization aka degradation of Europe.

The Kalergi Plan cuckening of Europe is a plan to permanently destroy the continent and prevent it from getting back on it's feet. America wants a Merkle vasal state Europe.

At the heart of America-ism is egalitarianism "we hold these truths to be self evident that all men are created equal" from their it's a short step to men and women are equal aka Feminism.

My position is a complete rejection of those values. Obviously this has ramifications in how I belive sexual relationship should be conducted and what masculintity is.

[–]YellowJulius0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

What do you think about the 20th century?

I’ve seen you mention this view a few times and I’m curious about it.

In my opinion (in combination with the reading I’ve done about the 20th century) the entire reason the U.S. sits in this undeserved lime light is because Europe essentially annihilated itself twice within 50 years, almost literally meat grinding a generation of young men for no gain.

Why do you think this happened? Or do you see it as a different kind of event?

In my ideal world I’ve always dreamed about Germany winning the First World War, avoiding world war 2 , and the U.S. being very isolationist and successful now as opposed to a shitshow worldwide hegemony

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Post this to trp.red/tribe/glogang and you will get an effort post out of someone. The one stipulation is that we have a reading list and it's enforced.

[–]dulkemaru510 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

the more wholesome previous culture of America

The foundations of that culture are the same as those of today's less wholesome American culture.

It was but a matter of time; the inevitable course of history being the complete unraveling of the logic of those foundations, i.e. today's less wholesome American culture, as soon as the necessary (economic/political) conditions - that of course are themselves the result of those foundations - were in place.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp12 points13 points  (7 children) | Copy

  1. If you practice picking up women every day for a year, you're going to get good at picking up women.

  2. If you practice driving a car every day for a year, you're going to get good at driving.

  3. If you practice reading philosophy and abstract thinking each day for a year, you're going to get good a reading philosophy and abstract thinking.

What's the practical implication of 1, 2 and 3? You can pick up a girl, you can drive a car, you can discuss philosophy. Which one do you want to practice? Which one is most helpful to deal with your current problems?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well said. There's only so many hours in the day, and your life for that matter, so spend them wisely developing the tools and working towards the goals of your choosing.

When you're on your deathbed imagine your regrets and what was left unsaid and unaccomplished. There's your bucket list, now get to it!

[–]Jaggarojo2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

That's implying that we know exactly what to do to get to our goals. That's often not the case, especially not in mine.

I've circle jerked my redpilledness in this sub for a full year before realizing I was a LARP and still didn't understand shit. I glued my fucking eyes to the theory, expecting minimum mistakes, yet that whole mentality was wrong. Guilty as charged.

It's clear to me that I must unfuck my programming to a certain degree before being able to use actionable RP advice to embrace my experiences.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Like /u/JamesSkepp asked, what are your goals? Here's a solid thread for diving in and making them into reality:

/r/TheRedPill/comments/2131ox/goals_a_quick_guide_on_how_to_attain_them/

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

That's often not the case, especially not in mine.

What goals do you have?

[–]Jaggarojo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I got a bunch, they're respective to each field though.

Got different ones for academics, lifting, sports, and personal projects.

But ultimately that wasn't my topic. My topic touched more on my ego's preservation tactics that restricted actionable contributions to my goals. That's something I'm working on thanks to the help of MRP recommended literature.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you don't know what you should have at goals it still works:

Give yourself 12 months, build up your value and abundance as your main goal, then in a year you'll have figured it out somewhat.

And when you change your mind or change sensibilities, start again

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I like how you put it.

It's deliberate action towards a goal, which is a great way of framing it

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten9 points10 points  (2 children) | Copy

Piling on....

If you're not a cultural individualist or reject liberalism (definition incoming and I don't mean American Democrat) then the perspective of the "OG TRP" isn't going to make a lot of sense. Old school TRP is libertarian individualist at its core. The ethos is all about you, your ego, and how the two interact to produce the results. TRP is about being an island first, in many ways.

Liberalism is the egalitarian belief we're all roughly equal at the start. GLO style thinking is anti egalitarian, we're not equal at all. I am anti egalitarian as well.

Become The Prize, TRP commands. The rest follows. This is a vacuum for guys searching for more of a tribe experience. Boys are more socially isolated and phone-tarded than ever before. Trying to use the methods in the side bar is practically brute force for that demographic.

The newest generation tends to be more collectivist even in Western Nations. In addition, the return to traditionalist (Julius Evola traditionalist, not "get married and have babies") thinking seems to be much more common with in young people now. GLO is answering that with "prove you lift" and difficult philosophy. I believe his system works really well for high cognitive ability guys that don't click with OG TRP.

[–]Jaggarojo0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Had to search up half the -ism words.

Liberalism is the egalitarian belief we're all roughly equal at the start.

I do firmly believe most humans are equal at the start, and that the way you were raised will strongly dictate the way your life unfolds. But I'm not a fan of equal opportunity or equal rights, if that what you were actually referring to.

Ever since my frequent lurking, I have taken a much more individualistic approach in life, because I realized that I have been lacking in making decisions for myself for the longest time. Though, because the world is so easily connected nowadays, one of the most efficient way to navigate it is through your network, hence the strong emphasis on collectivism.

Everyone will have a good argument as to why a certain -ism should make the world better. And because of that, I originally thought it was useless wishful thinking, which was why I posted my question in the first place. If the ECs understand the world so well, why do they focus so much on changing it?

It comes down to a matter of taste, of identity, and as you said, of cognitive ability.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

I am totally uninterested in changing the world, I am articulating GLO's position

I am a hardcore bourgeois capitalist. I like my money and myself. Everything else doesn't even come third, it's not even in the race

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Under what circumstances and/or what rationale did you deem it preferable to operate this way?

When from a theory perspective it was unavoidable I had no control over the outcome and that failure was the intended outcome, evolutionarily speaking.

Not only that, the "agreement" was asymmetrical.

Men agree to limit their sexual prerogative (procreate wildly) and women claim to limit theirs (hypergamy). That's the basis of monogamy.

Women can't agree to be non-hypergamous. Men on the other hand can negotiate with their biological impulses, because a girlfriend\wife from your bodies perspective IS winning.

Your body : "Wow, you must have 4000 children... good job man."

Her body : "This guy would lose in a bar fight, badly."

So you make the choice to be the guy that would stab someone in a bar fight because the alternative is asymmetrical (male) disposability.

At the end of it all, TRP is just a mirroring of female dating strategy (not the sub).

AF\BB is having a wife who lets you mess around if you're a male.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt1 point2 points  (19 children) | Copy

Those who, in the face of advice-seeking, prefer to talk about abstract concepts rather than sharing their own personal experience on the matter.

First things first... ask yourself:

  1. How does this apply to sexual strategy?
  2. How does this make me into the best version of myself?
  3. Is what I'm reading providing actionable advice or tactics for raising my SMV or capitalizing on it?

If you don't have a succinct answer to the above then you're just going through the ropes and probably guilty of mental masturbation. Don't be the guy who thinks he's being cultured or philosophical somehow makes up for lack of being attractive or approaching. You still have to put in the work regardless how high you may see yourself being above "the plebes".

Those who actually approach women or have sky high status that does much of the work for them will always see better results than even the most cultured beta. The good news is you can still do the philosophy route, but you have got to be putting the knowledge into practice, otherwise what point does it serve?

I liken it to martial arts. You can read about it, you can watch videos on it, you can have discussion groups about the different philosophies behind them, but it'll never compare to actually sparring with a live partner and taking a punch.

Speaking of martial arts, many are great for fitness and go a long way towards building confidence.

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil6 points7 points  (18 children) | Copy

Here let me help you out since you seem to be very confused. Reading difficult texts is exercise for your verbal comprehension. The more a person reads the better they will be able to understand and consequently respond to a situation.

Since the primary issue of AskTRP is that they are improperly socialized and poor at social interaction this is the first step. Next Psychoanalysis was specifically developed because wealthy German men had problems with their hysteric wives (shit testing). Rich men sent women to frued to unfuck them. So there is definitely a wealth of knowledge there.

On the other hand I do agree with you if someone is a plebe not all text is accessable to him. Likewise if he is weak willed going to the gym isn't a viable strategy for him. He might talk about it but he will never actually do it seriously.

Since these people are plebes and incapable of real personal development they should instead focus on selling their shitshow of a life as something more than it is. Obviously this only works in the short term, but sometimes that's all people have.

Now everyone has the strength to actually live by masculine ideals and develop a muscular body some people have to lie and hide behind smokescreens. That's all they can do. I'm not here to make a moral judgement.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt4 points5 points  (17 children) | Copy

Nope not confused.

The more a person reads the better they will be able to understand and consequently respond to a situation.

Not unlike the general electives in a degree program. They're not specific to the specialty, but rather are meant to make someone "well rounded".

Since the primary issue of AskTRP is that they are improperly socialized and poor at social interaction this is the first step. Next Psychoanalysis was specifically developed because wealthy German men had problems with their hysteric wives (shit testing). Rich men sent women to frued to unfuck them. So there is definitely a wealth of knowledge there.

This is where we disagree. 1. Much of that psychoanalysis stuff from back then has since been found to be bunk. 2. Much of the modern works of that field are gynocentric. 3. Most guys are going to learn far faster from practical experience, especially through guided instruction, than they ever will from reading books, regardless of whether or not that's philosophical classics like Plato or contemporary PUA books like The Mystery Method.

Action > Words

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil6 points7 points  (16 children) | Copy

No. The general electives in a university are taught by human garbage. Nobody learns anything from them ever.

There are specific philosphical works which have been used to cultivate leaders. These works have to be pried from the hands of liberals so they can be taught by men to young men.

1) Next Psychoanalysis is not "bunk" because it's the underlying theory behind marketing. Frued was a pioneer in uncovering irrational drives, drives which can be hijacked to sell people things. Most people who dismiss Freud have not read Freud and have no clue what they are dismissing.

2) Contemporary works have been politically influenced. Which is why it's important to read original essential works like Frued.

3) Most Guys are going to learn better from practical hands on instruction because they have a middling intelligence and an inability to apply abstract concepts on their own.

Unfortunately so long as a person is living his life by a rubric instead of his own interpretation of some higher truth he is a beta male follower. Anyone using pickup lines is by definition a beta male because he is immitating the spontaneous masculintity of someone else.

If you dress beta males up in flamboyant outfits and make them repeat lines are you really helping them are they being helped? Or are they props in some sick perverted game?

Unfortunately all men are not created equal not everyone is capable of doing everything. Leadership requires a certain amount of intelligence spontaneity and drive. If a person doesnt have what it takes it's better not to give him false hope and string him along.

Yes, a mass individual is not capable of benefiting from books which is why he will forever be inside the matrix and will suffer in exactly the same ways everyone else suffers in the modern age. That's why the Red Pill is offensive to the mass individual and should not be catered down to the mass individual, as it won't be able to help him. Instead he will wear the Red Pill like a fancy hat and change nothing exactly like Mr. Dream.

The next issue is this whole Action > Words thing you keep posting. We've allready had a discussion on TRP.red on personal application with regard to lifting ... So I'll spare you the burden of having that discussion again.

The problem is that action that is not thought out is an impotent action. Let's take this Red Pill YouTube channel as an example. It's the same content from 2015 recycled yet again. The Red Pill community isn't subscribing to it at all.

Now if you took a step back and thought about aesthetics, looked into theory and new perspectives and then made a YouTube Channel then perhaps you could have had a viable product. The doors still open to that so if you are ready to pivot or try something let me know.

Maybe in that specific case talking about it would have been better than doing it at least until you had a solid plan.

Uninformed action is impotent action. So the first step is becoming informed.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt1 point2 points  (15 children) | Copy

One day you'll learn the value of do as I say, not as I do. Parents get this one for free.

Those of us who are older and experienced in ways you younger guys can't understand, both for good and for bad, just might know a thing or two about life since, you know, we've lived it.

My recommendation for those of you in your teens, 20s, and 30s is to leverage this knowledge and experience for your benefit or else you're going to learn the hard way like we did.

3) Most Guys are going to learn better from practical hands on instruction because they have a middling intelligence and an inability to apply abstract concepts on their own. Unfortunately so long as a person is living his life by a rubric instead of his own interpretation of some higher truth he is a beta male follower.

Agreed. This is why I like the training wheels approach to teaching game. Structured approach can only take them so far, but that's not why we use it. It's all about giving them an initial series of positive experiences to help create a positive feedback loop of success.

Practice Breeds Competence, Competence Breeds Confidence

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil5 points6 points  (7 children) | Copy

do as I say, not as I do. Has tremendous value. It is valuable as a diagnostic of male impotence.

"do as I say, not as I do" but "look at her actions, not what she says"

The moment anyone says do as I say, not as I do. he has admited to not being unable to perform the act. The question then immediately becomes if he by his own admission is incapable why should I listen to him?

Isn't it better to listen to people who have in fact demonstrated the ability to perform the act?

The next question is why would anyone want to take the advice of the White Gen X - Boomer generation. I mean we all fucked their daughters and those bitches are beyond fucked up. Why would I want to take the advice of a generation of men who raised the most degenerate whores in human history?

Honestly I would rather take the masculintity advice from an Asian or Indian man. Why because their daughters aren't cutting their sons penises and turning them into transgenders. White women are the most degenerate human beings to have walked this Earth and it is their fathers fault.

Why? Because their fathers jerked off in front of sportsball and Fox News. They never actually raised their children to be human beings instead they spouted off impotent platitudes while their daughters orifices got streached to unheard of dimensions.

I guess what I'm asking is given the circumstances why should anyone listen to the White Gen X - Boomer generation. Wouldn't it be better to do the exact opposite of everything they say and do given that we know how that turns out?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy

The moment anyone says do as I say, not as I do. he has admited to not being unable to perform the act.

Sometimes that's true. Sometimes it's not. What if I told you people who made mistakes in the past (blue pill) can turn things around learning from the community? I know, right? It's crazy talk! /s

Negative results are only truly a failure when don't learn from them. This is just as applicable when learning from others other's mistakes as it is your own. edit: perhaps a better way of putting it is learn from my mistakes so you don't repeat them, or "Do as I say, not as I did."

The question then immediately becomes if he by his own admission is incapable why should I listen to him?

I thought you were into philosophy, what's with this absolutism stuff? As for why, lived experiences others may benefit from, which is how and why this entire community came into existence in the first place. This goes hand in hand with my statement above about learning from others. We compare notes, figure out what went right or wrong, and adapt our strategies accordingly.

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy

Ok then I guess we agree completely. After comparing notes, I have seen the negative results and failures experienced by your demographic.

The rampant promiscuity of white american women. The opiod addiction of american sons. The Xanex Wine stupor of white American mothers. The inability of American men to lead or read or put down the cheese burgers.

I am deeply greatful to you for explaining to me your world view and perspective. I personally belive that it is this broadly speaking right libertarian perspective that is responsible for the afer mentioned societal issues.

Comparing notes, learning from others, figuring out what went right and wrong and adapting our strategy accordingly is exactly what we should be doing. I'm glad we finally agree after so much unfortunate contention.

I think we can all agree that these problems are explicitly American and to overcome them we must help men move beyond the American values that cause them.

The first order of business should be to read Philosphy because that is the most unamerican thing imaginable.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I think we can all agree that these problems are explicitly American and to overcome them we must help men move beyond the American values that cause them.

These are western problems. Australia, Canada, New Zealand, America, and UK/Western Europe are all suffering from those issues you cited. It's the same shit throughout with Western Europe being especially cucked. I'm looking at you Germany.

NZ and Australia are the only outliers wrt the obesity epidemic. Fast food isn't as popular there... yet, but for the most part the rest are still major afflictions.

I personally belive that it is this broadly speaking right libertarian perspective that is responsible for the afer mentioned societal issues.

Libertarian, maybe. Leftist soybois, most definitely.

[–]inbredostrptw0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It’s not always true that when someone says do what I say not what I do that they’re incapable, in my experience some of the most capable people I know just have a level of dgaf where they don’t follow their own advice, but the advice is really good and clearly has been implemented by them in the past

[–]AWALTnationn2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

One day you'll learn the value of do as I say, not as I do.

This is precisely the mantra of someone who has nothing genuine to offer. Why would anyone follow what you say if it's readily obvious that it's not supported in what you do?

The answer is - they wouldn't. The experience of those that have genuine lived experience wrote about it in detail. The writings in most of the big bad books by bad important men we're not supposed to talk about show both combat and academic experience and a consistent rejection of neoliberal mediocrity by every single point on the political compass. Aeschylus fought in the battle of marathon, Marquis de Sade survived the French Revolution by being an unstoppable ultra serial rapist, Ernst Junger took part in multiple heavy assaults during WWI and became on of the only people to critique mustache man and friends from the right. None of the previously mentioned men have any direct connection or knowledge of each other's existence and have radically different understandings of the world. Someone able to read and comprehend the texts can synthesize information into an entirely new from, not by copying as you are only able to do.

By your own admission there is absolutely no reason to learn from you as you haven't done anything to learn from. The average modern neoliberal man (that is to say bluepill) has a guaranteed life of three things, heavily taxed 9-5 work, frustration and a forgettable death. If you fail to differentiate yourself from the average in reading comprehension, philosophial knowledge and physical strength, what exactly are you and why should I care?

I shouldn't. You lack substance and you're not even good at gesture.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

You must be new around here so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. My contributions are in the main sidebar and the one right over there -->

Much of my wisdom (from those lived experiences you are criticizing) are woven into the very foundation this community was built upon, not to mention the manosphere in general.

This is precisely the mantra of someone who has nothing genuine to offer. Why would anyone follow what you say if it's readily obvious that it's not supported in what you do?

You must not think very highly of your parents.

[–]AWALTnationn1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

I've been here since before the 2016 election so I've seen the shift, exodus of EC's and general incellery. I've also read the entire sidebar and can give you a post for post breakdown of why the content is lacking. It is in fact woven into the manosphere in general and in part explains the decline in quality over the past 4 years. The content here is kiddie pool shallow. I don't want your lists or your alpha dark triad lone wolf strategies because I don't want to copy anything about you. Maybe the content you post worked 12 years ago, it doesn't work now. The Red Pill is a response to (at the time) current sociopolitical events, you still cannot produce deep and unique insight into anything that's happened in the past 4 years. You're just a kotakuposter. You use large quantities of rhetoric, and poorly.

Fitting what you are, you also failed to respond to me. You must also be new to reading comprehension, so I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

exodus of EC's and general incellery

The closure of the incel subreddits has definitely driven them to our shores. If you have advice for them, then make content for them. If you think you have EC worthy insights of your own, feel free to post them.

I've also read the entire sidebar and can give you a post for post breakdown of why the content is lacking.

Feel free to make a thread about it.

cannot produce deep and unique insight into anything that's happened in the past 4 years.

Like the above you're welcome to post your "deep and unique insights" into what's changed over the last 4 years.

Also, 4 years is nothing but a blink of the eye once you get older, so if things have changed as dramatically as you say then that could be why us older guys who've been around a long time don't recognize them.

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Honestly, the best approach is 'try it and see for yourself'

Take everything with a grain of salt unless it jives with your own experience (emphasis mine)

And it's great for when someone is offering categorical imperatives that are unfalsifiable... If you can't see if it works or not, why waste your time on the correlation.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

general incellery

Nightmare. Transformed the sub permanently and it is a shame

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

The problem with doing everything inside your head is there is no negative feedback. there are no wrong answers and everything you do was exactly what you were supposed to do.

If you're at a point where you are financially successful, have 0 problem dating girls in parallel or serial, or have climbed up the the final tier on the Maslow's hierarchy, fill your boots. Navel gazing is a privilege that is earned from a life well lived... Which is likely why kids in their early 20s are so drawn to it, it's a great shortcut and built in rationalization for why it wasn't worth embedding yourself into the human condition, experiencing the lessons that you need to experience and not read about, or checking ones ego in the face of failure despite best efforts.

Under what circumstances and/or what rationale did you deem it preferable to operate this way?

I don't find any circumstance where using logic and rationale is beneficial. A great explanation of logic and rationale came from Rory Sutherland, top dog at one of the top ad agencies in the world (basically the king when it comes to manipulation) they don't exist to objectively understand the world, but to convince others to embrace our own framing of the objective world.

This is why the scientific method was so revolutionary, it was the only successful push we've had for actual objectivity, which is why this place was built on a foundation of field reports and replication.

As for the metaphysics and philosophy stuff, fill your boots, just finish your dinner first.

[–]Jaggarojo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

My question seemed to be "Why is GLO and similar ECs so into their own paradigms" whereas my real question was really "Why are they so much into that intellectualism in the first place".

Logic/rationale doesn't exist to objectively understand the world, but to convince others to embrace our own framing of the objective world.

And you just hit the nail on the coffin. This whole mental masturbation stems from prioritizing the wrong stuff in my journey.

Brb gonna go eat dinner.

[–]Ikar114 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

How do you deal with the Clown world? The media, government, education systems, consumerism, betas, entertainment, social media,

Do you just blend in ? Or you isolate most of the time ?

What you think when you see that a certain situations is going wrong and nobody in the audience has any idea.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

You stop trying to save the world like a doofus and focus on what you can control - yourself and the life you lead. If the internet existed in 1974 there'd be a bunch of guys posting this about Led Zeppelin and premarital sex. Culture changes, and you can't go back.

Money is freedom first and foremost. Go get some of it....

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do not stick your neck out.

  • Do you really need to talk politics, or do you just want to?
  • Do you need to fuck a coworker, or do you just want to?
  • Do you need to have a YouTube channel about drilling broads, or do you just want to?

It's all ego.

At the end of your journey you don't need that validation. The fact that you blend in IS your validation.

Let's get dark for a second. You ever notice after a guy kills a bunch of people he never says jack shit as to why, even after he's exhausted all appeals?

Because he already won the mental struggle you have ages ago. He already realized most people are jackasses playing jackass games.

When people were squabbling over whether Ted or Jane was right about who was in the wrong at a party, a dude like that ignored the entire game you're talking about and shot someone in their car.

Very extreme view to see through here. Doesn't mean you gotta go bananas. Just understand that the end game isn't how you get to go against the grain. The Charlie Sheens, Dan Bilzerian etc.

It's the guys that know that entire game is all bullshit anyways. That's what powertalk is. Powertalk is reserved for people who don't need to engage literally, they're engaged on an entirely different intellectual level than people worried about your concerns.

The flipside of what you're worried about are men who worry about whether or not other men are misogynists, or trans friendly or whatever. They're playing the game at level 1.

Ascend.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Ignore it. It's all people scaremongering for ad revenue.

What you think when you see that a certain situations is going wrong and nobody in the audience has any idea.

For me it was when CNN did a report on my deployment. I wished I was on the one they reported.

[–]e36masterrace2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy

Game multiple women. Now, I understand the idea to date multiple women so you have abundance but I am currently in a LTR and I cannot seem to cope with this idea. Sure female company does boost my confidence and make me feel better but at the end of the day I feel bad. Even flirting without escalating seems to make me feel guilty.

Sure I am the price, she should compete for me, but if she is exclusive with me (for now), how wouldn’t I feel bad for giving infidelity in return?

Is subtle fake hints that I have many options the way to go rather than real side girls?

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you're in a position to draw social favors from women who compete for your attention or who make efforts to qualify themselves in your eyes, you stand to gain.

Women make terrible friends, in the truest sense of friend. They won't be as trustworthy, supportive, kind, or reliable as men who you can develop strong bonds of friendship with. For the high-value guy though, keeping women around who he isn't sleeping with can offer a lot of advantages.

For the average (or worse) guy, yes, it wouldn't be wise to try to build relationships with women he isn't fucking because the SMV mismatch would mean the woman would continually try to take advantage of the male resource (commitment) without offering the female resource (sex).

Be honest where you stand in that value measurement, and your answer is there.

[–]RStonePT5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

If it's < a year and you dont live together it's not an LTR, it's a plate.

you feel bad because you assume she's a dude with tits, and YOU would feel jealous dating a girl whose dating someone else.

Girls dont' respond the same way. It's preselection and abundance. I'm not saying you have to fuck 12 girls or you suck, but when this one starts pulling some bullshit, you need to know (not assume, know) that you can replace her easily.

Is subtle fake hints that I have many options the way to go rather than real side girls?

Telling is a low value thing, show (or let her infer)

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

Do you date multiple women b/c you want to or b/c TRP says so? Not everyone is cut out for multiple LTR. Most aren't.

how wouldn’t I feel bad for giving infidelity in return?

You make it known beforehand that you do date multiple girls.

Does this ring a bell:

You're not feeling bad b/c you're cheating on her. You feel bad b/c you want other women too but don't want to admit it to her b/c she won't like it and/or feel bad about it and you don't want that for her.

[–]e36masterrace0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Honestly, deep inside I don't want multiple women. But it seems to be a coping mechanism. It helps me clean my mind that she is not the "special snowflake" and prevents me from falling into ONEitis. It also helps not to drown into her frame to the point where I don't make progress as an individual.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

If you find yourself falling into her frame ("she's Special", is she? if so why?) you have oneitis for her and you cure it with abundance, which is the proper move.

The question is do YOU want to be exclusive with her OR do you want to not-cheat-on her-but-still-fuck-other-girls?

Secondly, why do you think you "wont make progress as individual" while being with her? She makes demands you cave in or you slip up in pursuing your goals instead opting to spend time with her?

[–]e36masterrace1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

The question is do YOU want to be exclusive with her OR do you want to not-cheat-on her-but-still-fuck-other-girls?

I'd rather be exclusive with her. I am being treated the way I wish to be and that's why I want to give the same in exchange. The cons are neglible that's why I perceive her as LTR material.

And by not making progress I meant that I obsess with her. I overthink everything regarding her and usually these thoughts are accompanied by anxiety. I do catch myself losing motivation for the stuff that are relevant to me such as hobbies, work, projects.

When I communicate with other women I remind myself what the reality is. I can't say that I deeply desire to sleep with other women, but rather a tool to preserve my mental health. That's how my mood is better, and my frame gets more solid.

But deep inside, I feel the guilt. Maybe it's just not who I am as a person?

I do realise how controversial this may sound, fact is, my thoughts are also as chaotic as this post. Perhaps I needed to vent out a bit.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

But deep inside, I feel the guilt.

You need other girls not to go beta/BP and for the relationship to have you as alpha/RP. IOW you're learning how to handle women, just bad timing that you found one you want to LTR.

And by not making progress I meant that I obsess with her. I overthink everything regarding her

You value her more than you value yourself. Healthy approach? In fact, it's even counterproductive approach if you want to keep her as LTR.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Actions speak louder than words. There's subtext to be conveyed when you have options that will be loud and clear that never requires you issue a single word to hint at it.

[–]Vouch33r2 points3 points  (19 children) | Copy

How to stop feeling suicidal? I have sex, on a good education path and decent social life. Yet I don't have anything to wake up to nor want to try anything because it all feels so pointless. Like having passions for the sake of having passions. As if you've seen everything and feel your life is at the finish line.

PS Only spending the night with a girl seems enjoyable but it's like a cocaine hit lasting a few hours.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

Stop overthinking life's meaning, you're 20-something and won't figure it out without life's experience. In fact for a month stop thinking at all. Start exercising, preferably outdors. Cut social media to zero. Change your social circle for a new one, see if you miss anyone from old one.

If you have a passion b/c you're supposed to have one, you don't have a passion. Surely, there is something you do like to do or would like to do. Start doing it.

[–]Vouch33r0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you, I appreciate the time you took to reply. I do some of those things already but you proposed some good steps to take. Worth giving it a shot.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

Like having passions for the sake of having passions. As if you've seen everything and feel your life is at the finish line.

Mike Rowe said something that ties into this nicely. Don't do what you're passionate about (eg. for a job), but rather become passionate about what you do. Do that and you'll enjoy your job and life in ways most people only dream of.

[–]redpillbanana2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is good advice. Some people talk about having passions as if it is something that happens to you. Sure some people discover their passion at a very young age but most of us have to seek out our passions.

In general, treating things like an active verb rather than a passive verb will get you farther in life, e.g. being fit vs working out and achieving fitness.

[–]Vouch33r0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you, I will dig into this piece of advice to make good use of it.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's normal for life to have ups and downs. If depression or anhedonia become bothersome or intrusive, you need individual professional assistance, not advice from us internet strangers. Good luck to you.

[–]Senior Endorsedmax_peenor2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes. There are a lot of charlatans in the world of mental health, but the truth is sometimes there really is something wrong.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten5 points6 points  (9 children) | Copy

I'm going to give you weird advice. If you don't have a predilection for a mental illness (meaning see a therapist at least a few times beforehand) go get yourself some LSD, and ONLY TRIP WITH SOMEONE EXPERIENCED.

My first trip was with a PhD psychologist plate and it changed my fucking life. Just sayin'. Can't emphasize "experienced trip partner in a comfortable place with a GOOD STARTING MINDSET" enough. That shit is mandatory. But, no better time than your young stupid years to poke the annals of your brain. You might be surprised what you find.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I second this advice with strong caveats. I've seen people's preexisting mental illness get pushed off the deep end by a bad trip, and many more waste it as a party drug learning nothing from the process.

Timothy Leary promoted a lot of woo and outright BS, but his lecture on dosage, set, and setting should be required reading for people considering "acid therapy."

[–]Vouch33r1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy

Don't want to sound like a whining bitch but this shit is hard to obtain and I don't know any users who could be my trip guides. Shrooms would be the closest I could find and do them on my own.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

Do you have a friend group that makes you feel a sense of belonging?

[–]Vouch33r0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

No I do not have one yet unfortunately

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Then you are missing a key element of Maslow's Hierarchy of needs. Until you do the work and fix it, your feelings will persist.

[–]Vouch33r0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

I'm actively fighting for such a group, some people choose careers over company , others take time to befriend but I'm getting there.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Persist. You'll find that when you have your own little fraternity those thoughts will go away almost entirely. When you do have them, your bros will have your back (and you can actually talk about this stuff to them without fear)

[–]Vouch33r0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thank you man. I appreciate the time you took to reply for my question. And for the whole help you give to the community as well. Always a pleasure to read your post. All the best

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

No problem man. It seems simple when someone else says it, but hard to be objective with yourself. If I didn't have a right group of bros I'd be miserable at times too.

You can't do life alone. We aren't built for it

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're in a feedback loop. Something triggers this, and you start wondering whats wrong with you, then the feedback loop kicks in and your depression isn't about the trigger, but about you feeling damaged and broken.

James has the right idea, I'd also look into cognitive reframing. Men are easily manipulatable, as this subs existence will show. Taker that knowledge and make it work for you. Start reframing the trigger situations and this will help immensely.

Also, expand what you try, eventually things start to stick.

[–]dadfrombrad-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like a chemical imbalance, nothint 80mg of Prozac can’t fix

[–]unamedasha2 points3 points  (10 children) | Copy

Whats the best way to cultivate a quality social circle?

My situation: young professional recently moved to a large (top 40 or so) US city living with 2 roommates who share a friend group from college. We all are decently high smv (lift, good jobs, attractive, and social). We typically go out 1-2 nights a week.

My problem: A lot of our friends from school live far away or aren't social (have gfs, introverted). I'd like to expand this social circle to include high quality girls and guys in our city outside of who we know from school and to be less cliquey overall. I can spin plates and ONS chicks but when it comes to meeting cool girls you can invite around or guys that are social too, it's more difficult. Ideally, I'd host more parties, but thats a sort of chicken-and-egg problem where we need to know people to have fun parties.

Im sure some ECs have gone through this situation. Thanks.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy

I can spin plates and ONS chicks but when it comes to meeting cool girls you can invite around or guys that are social too, it's more difficult.

You've got the solution to your problem and don't even know it. Friend zone the girls and there's your social circle. You've got a soft harem ready to go with a lifetime of threesomes and more, all you have to do is start treating them like...friends. Sex will still happen naturally on the side with many, so that won't be an issue. And if you are actually good at sex you'll start getting referral sex from your now friends with women THEY are friends with and the social circle just grows from there. This is getting into /u/vasiliyzaitzev territory so if you want to learn more go read his threads.

Just be mindful of jealous orbiters who the women keep as "friends" who will try ot torpedo your game. It happens.

[–]unamedasha0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Ok great. Say you fuck a girl and decide you dont want to plate her. How do you then friend-zone her. Just invite her over to pregame and shit?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Short version: Have the talk about non-exclusivity and keep them as FWB. Long version: calling /u/vasiliyzaitzev

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep. It's up to the girl to ask for exclusivity. If she wants it and you don't care if you keep her, just release her back into the wild. If she wants it and you want to keep her as a FWB, then have the convo and tell her that you will agree to see where it goes.

As a guy with abundance and who is pretty direct, I just tell girls from the jump that I "keep a rotation". some of them bow out, which is their right, some view it as a challenge, etc.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Do all the shit guys in here have to work at learning not to do. most guys should intuitively know how not to fuck girls

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Find a niche that doesn't exist in your 'burg. Ex. I'm a wine guy, so I might join a group that does wine tastings. If there wasn't one, I'd found one. Years ago I had a roommate who was a doctor. We put together a wine tasting to benefit his hospital (it was a non-profit). It just blew up. We got wine shops involved, and they got vineyards involved, and then we got other entities involved that matched up (dairy farms provided cheese, a supermarket provided some other things, all in exchange for the exposure). And guess who got half the credit for putting it all together? And guess what two guy became the two most eligible bachelors in town? That was a bit of an outlier, but the PR folks at the hospital got into it, which made it easier.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're overthinking it. A party can be 10 people. You know who knows a lot of girls? Girls. Where is the most immediately logical place to cultivate non-sexual friendships with girls? Your workplace, if you're actually in solid white collar careers. Here is the relevant excerpt from something I wrote to someone else a bit back.

The key is social circle game. This means meeting and keeping platonic female friends of a similar socioeconomic status. I did this by getting to know the associate lawyers, bank analysts, mgmt consultants, and other types via work. I arranged informal social events either at my apartment or got some corporate money to do "networking" events. We all worked 80hrs a week and crossed paths a lot - people are surprisingly receptive if you take the reigns and have a female face as your co-leader.

I personally prefer to socialize with more alternative circles, so I also kept my group of LES and Brooklyn service industry, musician, etc friends. Your banker colleagues will be mystified and admire you if you can bring them into a cool dive bar where everyone wears leather and doesn't turn their nose up at the guy in the suit. You accomplish this by becoming a regular at these places. I liked punk rock and could speak the language, so I fit in fine. Amusingly, the grungy types also like having a token banker friend.


P.S. for others in your situation, I technically wrote this for a guy that moved to NYC but the points are all the same. Quote begins below in full as it flows a little better:


Thanks for the info. I did the same white collar track at your age and lived in the "cool" Manhattan neighborhoods. Here is the rub:

There are more single women than men, specifically there is a natural shortage of available, attractive young guys with good jobs. On paper, you are a hot commodity. Act like it

HOWEVER, you are also in New york fucking city. An nyc 8+ can land a hedge fund manager, tech bro, etc. They can't keep them, but they can land them. Your competition is a broad age range and potentially very wealthy.

The key is social circle game. This means meeting and keeping platonic female friends of a similar socioeconomic status. I did this by getting to know the associate lawyers, bank analysts, mgmt consultants, and other types via work. I arranged informal social events either at my apartment or got some corporate money to do "networking" events. We all worked 80hrs a week and crossed paths a lot - people are surprisingly receptive if you take the reigns and have a female face as your co-leader.

I personally prefer to socialize with more alternative circles, so I also kept my group of LES and Brooklyn service industry, musician, etc friends. Your banker colleagues will be mystified and admire you if you can bring them into a cool dive bar where everyone wears leather and doesn't turn their nose up at the guy in the suit. You accomplish this by becoming a regular at these places. I liked punk rock and could speak the language, so I fit in fine. Amusingly, the grungy types also like having a token banker friend.

When you're established at work in a year , find your closest 2 to 4 bros and go live in a frat castle. What I mean is, go collectively rend a 3bd or big flex and use your purchasing power to have a really nice place. I lived in a penthouse in Murray Hill with a roof deck and grill with 3 of my homies and we absolutely cleaned up. Hosting on the reg, pregames were always at ours. Everyone knew us and it was a blast.

[–]Senior Endorsedmax_peenor1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

While not a silver bullet, one of the best ways Ive' ever seen is to take up with a theater troupe. Doesn't matter if you act or just help with the production. Everyone seems to get friendly very quick.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The eternal glory of the Art Hoes.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Be valuable, other valuable people spot it because it's so rare and you gravitate towards valuable people in the spheres you are in

[–]Slight-Surround2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Do you really think women are not capable of love like a man imagines? Really is a jab to the heart of a hopeless romantic like me

[–]dadfrombrad1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I don’t know if I agree with this. Have you seen the way a mother loves her son? Or a gold digger loves her rich husband?

The circumstances just gotta be right 😂

[–]CjuiedD1 point2 points  (12 children) | Copy

How do I develop better social skills

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt7 points8 points  (8 children) | Copy

Practice. Lots and lots of practice. See my response to OverSentient.

Also, look up my "Gift of Gab" threads. There's solid info in there that I've accrued from over the years.

[–]millioneuroextreme0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

Can you link it? Can’t find it

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt9 points10 points  (5 children) | Copy

Literally in the sidebar: https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2q582c/a_comprehensive_guide_to_the_red_pill/ <-- search "gift of gab"

Also:
https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2n7j2t/how_to_approach_and_get_contact_details_or_an/

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3zfe0q/30_day_challenge_small_talk_part_2_women_boogaloo/

https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/539w3b/red_pill_toolbox_appearance_action_and_persuasion/

Verbal & Non-verbal communications:
https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2yxw0o/trp_primer_verbal_and_nonverbal_communications/

Full version below...


THE GIFT OF GAB

When building rapport the first thing you should seek to do is identify and cultivate commonalities. Stretch the conversation out through past & future projections, create a link in her mind using memories, imaginary as they are, and branch off of statements. Nearly every statement has two topics (or more). Natural conversation isn’t questions followed by answers, it’s mostly statements spun off into new directions. This is the “gift of gab”. The baseline “secret” of doing this is to follow this simple rule:

Relate your experiences back to her using THOUGHTS and EMOTIONS.

When telling a story don't just spit out a bunch of facts of events and what happened. Tell her what was running through your head and what you were feeling when the event occurred. Use analogies as well for things that women might be more familiar with (shopping & movies are huge).

Bad conversation:

My TV broke last weekend during the game so picked up a new one Monday after work and of course Best Buy sucked as usual.

Good conversation:

I was watching TV last weekend and just as my favorite team was making the last drive to tie the game it broke. Just...poof. Nothing. I was soooo frustrated. Have you ever been watching something you were so into and then your power or cable go out and you miss a really important part? Doesn't that suck? Worst still is when I went to Best Buy the sales people were no help. Ever been shopping and everyone sorta just ignores you? Hellooo! I'm right hear people! Talk about frustrating. You know what I mean? I just kept thinking to myself 'I wonder what would happen if I just made up some popcorn in the appliances section and kicked off my shoes and lounged on the couch and popped a movie into the display setup they have?' That would kick ass and you KNOW they'd come running to see what's up.

Get the idea? Thoughts, emotions, and use what I call "checking in" to see if they're following along:

  • You know what I mean...
  • Have you ever...

You want them nodding their head, or even better piggybacking on your conversation thread and injecting their own stories as they relate to yours. A good way of getting them invested in the conversation is vertical conversation. Horizontal is the surface stuff, basic AFC questions. Vertical digs deeper. Check-ins for keeping the vertical conversations going are:

  • What was that like?
  • Really?

As I mentioned before, another key aspect to remember is to use past & future projections. Try and steer topics away from the present tense. The fastest way to have a woman’s else glaze over is to talk about facts and boring detail, which is exactly what happens when you are talking in the present tense. One of the best ways to build a connection is to use future projections. The reason they work so well is they build memories in her mind as she’s imagining the journey you’re describing. As you speak of your hopes & dreams two powerful things are taking place:

A) Women are drawn to ambition like moths to a flame.

B) Talking in past or future tense builds memories and gives the two of you a connection, imaginary that it may be.

It’s amazing how simple it is finding commonalities while painting the rich canvas of your life. That being said, the one thing you don't want to talk about if you can help it is the here and now.

Again, present tense = boring. The way the female mind works when you speak in the present tense they just get bored. I do this, that, blah blah blah...and their eyes gloss over. But when you talk about what you want to do in the future, they pay more attention. Plus part of it is we're more excited when we talk about fun stuff we want to do with our lives, so it's a win-win due to how it draws them in. It's how they imagine doing things with you and making mental links between the two of you.

If you ever get stuck just remember what Speer calls the 4WH, which is a great way of getting more open ended answers and investment:

  • What
  • Where
  • Why
  • When
  • How

Note: "Who?" is already covered--it's either you or the woman you're talking to.


CLOSING

The goal of the preceding conversational tactics is to draw out information from a woman and to keep a conversation going. The reason for this is to build some rapport and generate some investment on her part, which is what translates to attraction. The following explains what to do with that information in leading up to the close. Keep in mind that “closing” in this sense is different from closing mentality which is a whole other topic, so I won’t cover that. What I'm providing here is what gets you their contact details, nothing more.

The first step in closing is actually identifying commonalities, which is a large part of why one needs to become conversationally savvy. Generating investment through qualification and making statements are simple ways of making sure they’ll want to keep things going. Another good way of making sure you talk about topics they’re interested in is to discuss the 4 most popular female topics as evidenced by female media (eg Cosmo):

  1. Beaches
  2. Shopping
  3. Movies
  4. Partying

Relate something about yourself to one of those and you’re off to a great start. Seed reasons to close them….AND THEN TALK ABOUT THOSE REASONS. Don’t just mention something and then move away from that conversational thread onto another topic. Flesh things out a bit. Qualify them on the topics at hand. Create a genuine connection and get them invested. This is actually the second phase of closing.

Seeding the closing line: You’re essentially justifying ahead of time why you’re about to swap contact details. You do this justification by using one of the following closing methods:

  • Networking Close - The networking close is just like it sounds. A typical version is or work purposes and/or professional contact details. You’ll be asking for her details because you might want to swap resumes for a job someone has.

  • Point of Interest - A Point of Interest close is setting up a Day 2 for a specific event, like checking out a museum exhibit you both want to see. You’ll be asking for her details so you can send her the info, or vice versa, about whatever the subject was.

  • Party Close - Party closes are arguably the most powerful for “game” since it sets the frame you’ll be meeting specifically to socialize. Whether this is a house party, an art gallery opening, or something else is up to you. Ideally this should be an event where you are the center of attention. You’ll be asking for her details so you can get the event’s details to her, or vice versa.

  • Direct Interest - Direct Interest is the most popular with direct openers. You like her and you want to go out some time. End of story.

The last step is exchanging details. It’s rather straight forward and self-explanatory. A very solid way of doing so though is to not ask for her number directly, but merely saying the following line:

What’s a good way of keeping in touch?

No matter what contact details she gives you, remember she has complied and that’s a good thing. And don’t be dismissive of Facebook. It’s arguably the best form of contact details you can get right now since many check it repeatedly throughout the day, whereas they get in trouble for talking on the phone at work.

To summarize, closing has the 3 following steps:

  1. Identify commonalities
  2. Pre-seed the closing line
  3. Exchange details

THE FORMULA

For those familiar with AFC Adam's material, this should come as no surprise since my style of game is heavily inspired by his teachings....

Comfort minus rapport, plus qualification, plus sexual escalation, equals attraction:

(C - R) + Q + SE = A

This means you've got to establish some base level of comfort when you initially approach. Shortly after there should be a rapport break followed by some sort of escalation. This can be a high-five, and hug, etc. The amount of escalation depends on how comfortable she is with you at that moment. Also, when you do a rapport break you need to rebuild some comfort or you risk coming across as a jerk or asshole. An example of how all this might play out:

You approach with your palms up and are very polite. You talk for a minute and then tease her in some way (rapport break). You follow the teasing up with something that would break the tension, thus rebuilding some comfort. This would be followed by some sort of escalation on your part. It could be physical proximity (getting closer), touching her in some way, and so on. You repeat this process over and over again until your escalation culminates in a (sexual) relationship.

[–]millioneuroextreme1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Forgot that you can search stuff on reddit, thanks

[–]stenay0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

How about overexposure and becoming "famous" as the creepy pickup guy of the town as mentioned in this thread by JamesSkepp(Cant link his thread because my submission gets removed)

I wanna practice a LOT but I am afraid of those things. How do I decide the locations/frequence of my approaches so I dont "burnout" a city and dont become famous as a creep?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

When I did pickup back in the day I got really good really quickly because I was free to getting out of my comfort zone. Why was I able to do that? Because I was traveling regularly up to 3+ hours away from home so I didn't have to worry about things getting back to my social circle or getting a reputation like you pointed out.

That realization is also how I arrived at "vacation mentality" women get and why they are so much more prone to cheat when they're abroad and such. Guys get this vacation mentality too, but really we're always on the prowel even when we're not. With women it's a bit different (see also: ASD).

When there's no social circle to have to worry about to trigger ASD, lets just say women are much more open to new experiences. And if they travel alone, well that's just infidelity waiting to happen as there's zero reason to hold back. Think about how single guys are always looking for strange, when women travel they are free to do the same guilt free without any fear of repercussion or social blowback.

[–]stenay0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

you went to a new city every weekend? how often did you change the city?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I didn't travel hours away EVERY weekend, but once a month yes hence the up to. During the non-travel weekends I was still not playing in my immediate backyard and was going 45 minutes away to the next big city.

[–]Senior Endorsedmax_peenor4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

It helps if you stop giving a shit what other people think about you and be what you want to be. Uncertainty and doubt are gross behaviors.

[–]Senior Contributoradam-l1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Start with your social circles.

It's difficult to be social with random people if you don't have a circle of acquaintances, friends and buddies with which you are interacting routinely and comfortably.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

by fucking up social situations and learning to never make the same mistake twice.

Rinse and repeat

[–]spcparks1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Lets say that you are an ultimate chad. Extremely ripped and extremely good looking. And you are personable and understand the game and have great confidence.

Do the rules change for you? Lets say like showing too much interest in a woman. Does she assume that you are pulling chicks elsewhere and just trying to get a quick lay?

Also, showing no interest do they assume you can get any girl you want so they pull away?

Does being an extremely good looking chad with good game make girls insecure? Do the same red pill rules apply for him compared to an average or ugly looking dude with same confidence and game?

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do the rules change for you?

Depends on what you mean by rules. The general m-f one (Sidebar, Rational Male etc.), no they don't. Do chicks give you more leeway and "forgive" more mistakes, yes they do.

Lets say like showing too much interest in a woman.

You can, but why would you? If you're F1 driver, do you drive 300mph on public road?

Does she assume that you are pulling chicks elsewhere and just trying to get a quick lay?

Yes. This is not only her assumption, this is also "leaking" through your behaviour.

showing no interest do they assume you can get any girl you want so they pull away?

They pull away b/c you display too much of a player vibe and not enough "normal guy" behaviours. IOW not enough comfort, too much attraction. Spend time connecting with her by talking about something different than constant flirting. Don't over do it tho.

Does being an extremely good looking chad with good game make girls insecure?

Yes, but that's not b/c it's you in particular. Women SEEM confident b/c they mostly interact with men they don't want to fuck. Now that she interact with a guy she wants to fuck but he has demonstrable abundance and she saw your other girls, she gets insecure. Are you insecure talking with a 1/10 warpig? No b/c you don't want to fuck her so you don't care about fucking it up. Are you going to be as confident with 10/10 supermodel?

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes, but none of that matters if you aren't that guy. Best to stop the masturbatory vicarious fantasy and get to lifting and reading.

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes, but thats a poor way of framing it.

I've had clients who were fat and wanted to wait until they were thin to start approaching. I suggest otherwise, so you can see for yourself how the halo effect works with personal relationships.

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yes but none of this matters. You don't want to be less attractive, period.

[–]fatbloop1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

Books you recommend for an advanced reader?

Philosophy, Game, Science, Business etc etc. Genre doesn't really matter.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy

Did your college education include any philosophy? Have you read the basics (classical like Plato, at least 1 or 2 contemporary like Nietzsche or Kierkegaard)?

[–]fatbloop0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I've had no exposure. Any specific work of theirs do you think I should start with?

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

There is a Plato's The Republic reader group on TRP.Red. Start with that, it's the foundation of everything else. Be aware that contribution is mandatory and you'll be purged if you show up then don't share your notes. This is to make sure you're actually keeping up.

https://www.trp.red/feed/t/plato

If you don't want to do that, start with The Republic anyway and just use their notes when you get confused. You'll probably want to join after that.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Tons of good content here. Start with the sticked thread.

https://www.reddit.com/r/redpillbooks/

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

David Dutton - wisdom of psychopaths

Rory Sutherland - Alchemy

Dr David Bus - why women have sex

Vinketesh Rao - Gervais principle, Be slightly evil, Tempo

Franco - practical female psychology

Ryan holliday - trust me I'm lying

François de La Rochefoucauld - Maxims

[–]stenay1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I have three questions.

  1. I am afraid of approaching girls when there is someone nearby. How do I fix this?

  2. I am afraid of approaching girls in my city. Is it better to always go to another city?

  3. How often should I approach in the same area without becoming famous as the local creep?

When someones nearby

So I hesitate approaching girls when some other person is nearby and they can hear me. I have approached three girls so far and they were all alone in that area. I get a lot of anxiety thinking about people hearing me approach women. I cringe a lot thinking of people hearing me approach women and later accidentally running into the same people again.

Approaching in my city

I have mentioned this before. I live in a tech city and I am a tech guy. Most of the girls that come to our city are skilled tech workers or are coming as a junior at my university. People from my university class are close with the juniors and they play football together(not me though). I am afraid of hitting on multiple of my juniors and then them finding it out and thinking I am a creep.

Another reason why I dont approach girls in my own city is I run into the same people again and again. I am afraid of being known as a creep near a place where I live (or run into one of the girls later at my company).

To solve this I currently only approach women when I am abroad or when I go to a city thats an hour away. Any solutions?

  1. How often should I approach in the same area without becoming known as a creep? Once per week in the same area and 2 hours? When can I approach in the same area again?

I am working on myself. I workout, have a good haircut and try to wear nice clothes. I am working on getting abs. I look indian(not indian but am in the same region) and thats my bigggest disadvantage. People from our region are known as creeps. Hence the reason I am afraid of getting a reputation as an "indian creep harrasing women in the area"

[–]dadfrombrad2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Keep it natural and dress well and you’ll never receive that reputation.

Rather than approach, just chat up the girl next to you on the bus or the one you’re working on a class project with. If you talk to everyone you’ll speak with enough women that things will naturally reciprocate until eventually you’re dicks in their pussy

[–]TrailRiderCA1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Long time follower here but in a bind. Picked up this HB8.5 at the grocery store. Grab a few beers the same night, came back to my place (sunday), had some LMR that was too tough to break. She tells me she likes it rough a bit - spanking, hair pulling.

Texts when she gets home and then tells me how soaked her panties are. Make plans to cook dinner at my place Tuesday evening.

She comes over, we make dinner and have some wine. Go to my room and I lead everything as normal. Tell her to blow me and she does. Then resume some foreplay and then start in missionary which she’s into. I flip her over for doggy and start pulling her hair. Tell her to say my name and she says ‘no’. I’ve never had this happen! Since she said she likes it a bit rough I pull her hair harder until she does. But after this she didn’t seem as into it...I think I pulled too hard maybe. She’s fit and 5’9”.

She leaves about 45 minutes later and I sensed something was off. I text her the next morning to set something up and she tells me we should just be friends. WTF? I said ‘all good’ and continue my day. Later she texts me a picture of her sock bin (long story, she mismatches socks so I gave her shit about it on Tuesday). I don’t respond.

I know this is a bit of oneitis but she’s smokin hot and want to have another chance to redeem myself lol. Should I just move on? Not gonna be an orbiter to feed her attention seeking behavior. I led everything since we met and thus believe established a good frame.

[–]RepC0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How did you approach At the store?

[–]namaJehf1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

First date was meh, and she hasn't responded back to my text. Thinking of ft or calling her for a second date and getting over her if it dosent work. Is this a good move?

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy

"There's this one girl..." at the top of the sidebar reading list was written for this scenario. What do you mean "get over" someone you went on one date with? That's a clear symptom of overinvestment (which women rightfully find unattractive, even creepy) and lack of abundance mentality. You are the gatekeeper of commitment; offering too much of it up front is analogous to a woman offering sex too easily and wondering why nobody escalates it to commitment.

Keep several options in play. Know that the early 20s can be a brutal time in a man's love life, but that you're likely to hit a stride by your early 30s.

[–]namaJehf0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

If she wanted you she'd make sure you knew it. Women will climb walls, crawl over broken glass, share you with other women, etc if they really wanted to fuck you.

My advice to you is to spin other plates. Often the mere fact you have options is enough to get women interested/attracted. (see also: preselection) And you won't be coming across as needy like you probably are when you have the blue pill "she's the the One" mindset.

[–]redpillbanana2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

https://markmanson.net/fuck-yes

Think about this for a moment: Why would you ever choose to be with someone who is not excited to be with you?

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

When YOU think the date is meh, you stop thinking about her. I don't date meh bitches. You shouldn't either.

[–]trwawyrnd0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

why was the first date "meh"? was it because of you or her? sometimes girls will go out with you even if they're not into you but only to see what they can get and watch the dancing monkey. don't be a dancing monkey.

[–]Chadster1130 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

I have a few questions but this one I’ll ask for now: Rollo often talks about how a guy’s sexual strategy is to have sex with as many women as possible but also says that men love idealistically. How can these seemingly two conflicting theories/strategies coexist in guys?

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Men who write poems, make movies, write songs about how much they love a girl. They imagine the girls a special, The One, the love of his life and so on. The key is, they imagine this about her, they idealize her, idealize his feelings for her and idealize love as something ultimate.

OTOH, how many times a day can a man have sex? Say 3-5 times on planetary average (3,5 billion men). Do each of these men love some specific girl, or just fuck Betty b/c "look at that ass"?

Biologically speaking, our sperm is in millions, we can fuck 5 different girls each day for a year and nothing happens to us if we do. Women can't fuck 5 guys a day for a year b/c they get pregnant and they'll die if the man doesn't stick and provide for her.

[–]Senior Contributoradam-l2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Very interesting point.

You have to refer to evolutionary theory in order to understand this. Basically, male love is an evolved weakness. Your genes have evolved as to sacrifice you, in order for them to propagate. Male love is sacrificial (and, in that way, the only true notion of love), in that men are driven to sacrifice themselves for their loved ones - women included. In order for such a trait to exist, men must derive pleasure from it. So the ideal of protecting, providing and even sacrificing for your woman is something with which men identify, derive meaning and pleasure etc.

The net result is that their genes (i.e. offspring) are provided for, while their self is sacrificed.

Thing is, that "ideal" or romantic love only lasts for a couple of years. Afterwards, these intense romantic feelings subside. A couple of years of exclusivity for her vagina seems like a fair trade. Post-hunter-gatherer society then instituted marriage, that made exclusivity life-long and obligatory for men etc etc and things get complicated.

The pure male sexual strategy, though, is simply fucking a lot of women. This serves your genes too, and very much so, thank you.

So these two are the underlying foundations on what we call "Alpha" and "Beta" sex. Men are hardwired to pursue both.

Today, for societal reasons, the Beta strategy is not viable. So, only the "pure" sexual strategy has value for men: Have sex with many women, don't invest in any one.

[–]Senior Endorsedmax_peenor1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think he is trying to inoculate against one of the worst pathologies in male relationships--when men assume they have permanently secured sex and get let go. If you aren't always working to secure pussy, you aren't working to secure the pussy you already have.

[–]RStonePT1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You can love your wife and still fuck some strange.

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Men moralize sex on top of their wide arousal window. Since a woman need only pass the boner test, it is easy for men to be idealists.

Since women have highly discriminant arousal systems, she is not afforded this luxury. She must be pragmatic.

This is why female romantics are almost always n=0\n=1. They get basically one shot to get a masculine enough man who is blue pill and maybe it'll work.

By n=5+, she understands what you're talking about right now. That it's hard to find both of these things in one man and have it work out right.

That's women looking for blue pill alpha males. Male naturals etc.

[–]capodonca0 points1 point  (17 children) | Copy

What's the best defence against nihilism?

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't be one.

[–]redpillbanana5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

What's the best defence against nihilism?

Two things I can think of:

  1. Seeking out the best in humanity. A huge part of the population are no better than animals who seek out pleasure and avoid pain and if you focus on them then you'll not find much meaning in life. The folks who have moved beyond their animal nature are the ones you want to interact with.
  2. Having kids. Suddenly you'll be very invested in their future and the future of the world. Edit: note that I'm not necessarily recommending that people have kids, but it is a great cure for nihilism.

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Having kids. Suddenly you'll be very invested in their future and the future of the world. Edit: note that I'm not necessarily recommending that people have kids, but it is a great cure for nihilism.

lol this is not full proof. If anything my kids nihilpilled me.

[–]redpillbanana0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I can see things going in that direction as well, especially if your kids are grown.

[–]RStonePT5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

Actual nihilism.

People get it confused with existential nihilism, or the bottom of the reverse parable.

If you get the idea that life is subjective and meaningless, you eventually come to the conclusion that it's subjective and no one offers you any meaning. This gives you the freedom to build meaning as you see fit and persue it. It's great because you're the only person on earth you looks after your own well being.

Remember, only you wipe your ass every day without complaint. Maybe you should start treating that guy better.

And it doesn't require defense, it's a part of the process.

the altnernative is your pastor or parents giving you a life script and values and meaning then you trusting that they know whats best for you. Hint, they don't

[–]capodonca0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks for the advice

Btw i really enjoyed the video you made some time ago about the 7 priorities of a man. Really helped me.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's based on archwingers post in here

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Same answer I had to someone else. Don't seek out work or hobbies you're passionate about, but rather become passionate about the things you do (eg. your day job).

[–]capodonca1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks

[–]1DubbleFUPAwitCheez0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Albert Camus' view on the absurd, which is touted as an answer to nihilism, basically says something is important because you decide it's important and that's all it needs for it to be.

I believe that could lead to being "passionate" as you say. It was sufficient in elevating me out of nihilism and I think anyone that respects themselves and cares about their personal growth enough to find their way here can identify with the idea of "It's important because I say so."

[–]Senior Contributoradam-l1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

What's the best defence against nihilism?

Broadly speaking, the feeling of belonging.

[–]capodonca0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

To a specific group, to society?

[–]Senior Contributoradam-l3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

The bigger, the better.

Even volunteering to save turtles or.something can work for some people. Collective struggle, and the opportunities for human contact are great at dispersing nihilism. It can work bottom-up.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don't like that as much, since that's how we got guys like antifa, global eco fascists and other nutjobs.

I'd say to keep it as local as possible, but I'm not convinced it has to be.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Quick stroll through the history shows me MGTOW rage porn obsession. Get over it, and get over yourself first.

Then, here's the cure: be a fucking man. What do I mean? I mean this:

If you accomplish the basic elements of life: you earn an income that supports a good lifestyle. You challenge yourself to be better regularly. You have a circle of friends and sexual partners that make you feel accepted. Then, you won't even contemplate nihilism.

Hard work lies between you and that, however. Up for it?

[–]capodonca0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I'm working towards those objectives and i've progressed a lot though i'm not where i want to be yet.

The thing is that sometimes nihilistic thoughts come to my mind and make me question if these things are valuable to me. Not having them is bad but, are they truly what i want?

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thoughts are the weather. We don't control them part of the time, and they change for the worse sometimes. Recognize they are temporary and keep your mental umbrellas handy.

[–]PrinceAkechiG0 points1 point  (14 children) | Copy

How to cope with rejection and not being their first choice? - aside from the obvious answers such as keep improving and trying to create more options.

[–]Senior Contributoradam-l4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy

Now, if you are not her first choice, go elsewhere, obviously. But you phrased your question "not being their first choice", so it's a different thing. You seem to imply "rejection" from the female sex instead of a girl.

Unfortunately, there are no long-term shortcuts. You can try a few gimmicks (e.g. be the party organizer etc), but if you find yourself in that tough spot of not being their first choice in your daily interactions, you have to increase your Sexual Market Value. That's practically the only parameter through which women select their mates.

If you are very low on looks and very short etc, you might even be better off using prostitutes. Some westerners had to move to third world countries, where their SMV is greater by default, in order to enjoy female attention.

[–]PrinceAkechiG1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I land some lays here and there, but I get rejected more often than not and it still hurts like a motherfucker. I know that if I keep improving certain aspects of my life that I will eventually be their first choice more often but until then I have to work with what I have and do not want rejections to discourage me from keep trying.

[–]Senior Contributoradam-l2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

You will be rejected by women you are attracted to for all your life. There is no way to avoid rejection completely. Enjoy the time with them, accept the sadness when it ends, go forward.

Take women down from the pedestal, realize that's what they do. They have thousands of options. Derive your special self-worth from other sources, especially your own achievements.

[–]PrinceAkechiG0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Derive your special self-worth from other sources, especially your own achievements.

yesss. thank you. I think I just needed to read that once again. it can't be helped but sometimes I just lose sight of the answers right in front of me. back on purpose.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I am, no matter how you measure it, the thing many internet keyboard alphas fantasize about being. Looks, money, status, height, confident, all of it.

I get rejected all the time. All the time. A cold-approach-to-bang success rate of 10% would make you seduction Jesus (or you have terrible standards).

The difference between you and me, ignoring the superficial, is I know what I have to offer and I know women are irrational and fickle with their sexual selection. This gives me two things you don't have (but can certainly learn):

  1. You can be a fucking amazing partner and they'll still say no, and

  2. I know what I have to offer

This radiates an aura of desirability that, when it sticks with a girl, gives me her genuine and primal attraction. Seek that out (but don't be a pussy who gives up too easily). We are the chasers.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This article can help diagnose, repair, and calibrate your push-pull game. You're getting first dates meaning you're attractive enough physically. Now work on polarizing the dates sexually.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

How to cope with rejection

Get rejected so much until it stops bothering you b/c you seen it all and heard it all.

not being their first choice?

Context?

[–]PrinceAkechiG0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

>context
oftentimes struggling to get on a 2nd or 3rd date, obvious conclusion is that I am easily replaceable for whatever reason. the lack of feedback due to either ghosting or sugar-coating such as "sorry no time for the next two weeks" leaves me guessing what it was that was not enough, but I know that I have to improve all aspects from game over looks to job/income and I am working all of it as far as my capacity allows me to do so.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

The lack of feedback is the feedback.

If you're getting 1st dates but not followups, it's something you do, not how you look. IOW had looks been the primary problem you wouldn't have 1st date.

Generally speaking, on the first date, is she laughing or look like having fun? Do you engage her in banter, push pull? Do you start physical contact from the get go? Are you making statements that imply you're interested in fucking her?

[–]PrinceAkechiG0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

yeah, the dates that get me guessing usually end in make-outs where I had the impression that everything went great and felt like we clicked.

laughing and generally having a good time -- yes

push pull -- have to work on that

physical contact -- on good dates that get me guessing, usually, yes

implying that I want to fuck her -- not verbally but I though I implied by asking them out, applying kino and going for make outs

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Make-outs can be a double edged sword. It can trigger ASD causing them to regret it, and if they see you as a provider it can also work against you. Too often guys get put into the boyfriend beta provider box so women ration the sex. Making out or having sex can trip that up if it happens too soon.

On the other end of the spectrum if they get the sexual entergy out of their system like club make-outs, then they've got nothing left by the time you pull them to to wherever you're going to actually have sex.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Makeouts are poor thing to judge the interaction by b/c for her makeout is not a big deal.

From what you wrote, you have a general grasp of what direction to go, what to learn and you do get lays, just not as often as you would like. So it's not that bad.

Since some dates seem to go ok and still no progress, most likely it's something general. Did you maxed your looks or is there a room for substantial improvement? Do you have a social circle you could use for social proofing yourself? Is your verbal communication too nice despite being funny?

It's hard to know for sure without actually seeing the date and how you interact, but one thing you can do is to look for common things on dates that ended in sex vs. what's different on date's that didn't? Is it the girl and your reaction to her? Is is you? Perhaps you're too needy, too desperate for sex, getting a "win" or her attention?

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like you're not escalating. If you're getting a 1st date then the problem isn't your looks or initial game, you have them already interested in you enough so the ball is definitely in your court. Look up the Vi DiCarlo Kino Escalation Ladder. It's out there in the ethers and it's one of the best primers on the subject IMO.

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She's not yours. Brad Pitt got divorced. You're just a cog, man. Get yours.

[–]falafelman2210 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

Is having social media with lots of followers important for seeming popular and showing that other people like you? I’ve never used it often and only have one picture on Instagram so when girls ask for my Instagram or “stalk” me online, is what they see important?

[–]Senior Endorsedmax_peenor6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Social media is a great way for women to find ways to dislike you.

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Not the number of followers, but the content of the pictures. You and different hot girls. You doing fun stuff. You being social/pupular.

Also, if she want's your ig, she doesn't want to "stalk" you ("wanna know about this hot guy"), she want's to make an opinion about your social value and if you're going to be useful and/or fuckable. If she only asks/insists on ig contact (no phone) next her b/c she finds you unfuckable and you're being gamed.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

There are 2 strategies, and I've done them both.

Curate your awesome life carefully, so you look interesting and important. This is a decent amount of work, and if you fuck it up your social media just becomes a disqualifier for women to pick through and decide what's wrong with you.

OR

Have an Instagram that's private with basically no or old posts, and Snap. You just have these for the sake of communication. You tell women that. You use them in only that manner.

I used to do 1, now I do 2. But I have total abundance and can cold approach like a motherfucker, so 1 is just dumb for me now. YMMV

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

2

Mind blown. Can you expand? Account is straight empty?

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

There's like 20 posts and no recent activity

I will share stories I'm tagged in, which is frequent, but that's it

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's preselection and makes things easier, but if you still can't talk your way out of a wet paper bag it's not going to help once you are in person.

It's an amplifier, not value in and of itself

[–]Protocol_Apollo0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Seen some contradicting info on LTRs introducing other girls into the mix: sometimes it just a girl covertly telling you that she wants a 3some with you, sometimes it’s essentially her trying to end things by trying to rationalise cheating, and sometimes it’s just a shit test.

Pulled up 3 threads with similar (but not exactly the same) situations:

Case A:

https://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/f7vhwu/ltr_says_i_can_fuck_other_chicks_if_i_want/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

The mod (Rp norvell) said it was a shit test: what does he mean? And how would you pass this?

Isn’t it just a call to end the relationship? (Assuming this is her trying to rationalise cheating)?

Case B:

https://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9f9hlc/ltr_is_cool_with_me_fucking_other_women_and_i/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Here, it is slightly different where it’s OP making the opening move by saying he wants to fuck other women and his ltr then agreeing (rather than a woman saying it).

The mod (crazyhorse) deleted the comments saying that she will cheat and the mod approved the top comment which said he should just go for it and that the relationship will be fine.

Case C:

https://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/f3qc59/ltr_thinks_experimenting_with_another_girl_is_not/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Here a fair few ECs (nightwing vandaleen and itis) were saying to demote and one of them said to take her up for a possibility for a 3way assuming that’s what she was implying.

Am I correct in thinking the demotion was for almost admitting that she will cheat/will go rogue for a girl without OPs permission leaving you to wonder what else she can/will hamster away?

In essence, I would like some clarity on the difference between these cases and the actions you should take.

I see how Case C is more clearcut: the best thing probably is to demote.

But in general, how do you know whether it’s a shit test, her covertly saying she wants a 3way or her trying you to get you to kill the puppy?

[–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

But in general, how do you know whether it’s a shit test

It's not a shit test unless you count self-disqualifying "baby I would never".

 

"You should fuck other girls" as cheating trickle truth: is she as enthusiastic and horny about you as she was when you first met? Lack or decrease in affection? Distant, texting often, locking phone?

"I want to fuck other girls" and she agrees, her problem. You already want to fuck other girls, so she's probably going to get nexted. Be discrette, don't bring it up, don't rub it in her face.

3some case:

Am I correct in thinking the demotion was for almost admitting that she will cheat/will go rogue for a girl without OPs permission leaving you to wonder what else she can/will hamster away?

The obvious thing to do would be as the responses suggested: propose a threesome. If that doesn't fly, you're in the 1st case and look for the same signs.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The key is to not give a shit about why, but instead to do what you want with it and accept the consequences. Examples, all assuming LTR context:

It was a shit test. OK, you "fail" it and she gets all pissy. That means she is childish and you can now demote her. OR, you don't care about a 3way and say the same. In either case, doing what you wanted solved the fake problem.

She wants to bring in another girl, for real. This is one of the most common female fantasies. In that case, you can find ample info on that in Vasily's most recent post, or my comment history.

She wants you to break up with her. Cool, so you have 2 in the kitty, right? You then either fuck her until it falls apart while pretending everything is fine, or you peace the fuck out with no closure. Bada bing

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Problem is it's really contextual. I would say trust your gut here. If something feels wrong, she's trying to play you. If it seems genuine and exciting for both of you, roll with it.

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy

[removed]

[–]ModTheRedPike0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Did you have a question?

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes I have a question. How do I get girls???!!! Please provide an exact step by step guide with 4k HD YouTube in field videos or TRP is COPE BRO

[–]visualtech480 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

22y old, I recent got dumped with an LTR really suddenly and while some of the endorsed contributers helped me, especially GLO and our Uncle, I'm interested on how go forward with meeting new people and moving forward.

Place purged, her blocked, moving day by day a lot easier especially because I have 2 jobs and am a big social circle of amazing buddies.

I'm pretty successful, have my own place, car, passion with 3d modeling, lift now constantly 6 days a week, 3d is my job as well and I love it.

However, when I was with her it was great because I love to lead, help, do exciting shit and give wisdom, which is why each girl I was with their future boyfriend says she is best as she learned a lot throught me, but now that she left there is that void which begs the question, how would I go about it?

And that "void" is what I do believe needs fixing, but what is your take on my current situation.

Any tip really helps. Appricate it.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

I'm interested on how go forward with meeting new people and moving forward.

Time heals all wounds blah blah blah. IMO the best way to get over a woman is to get under a few new ones. 3 months after a particularly nasty breakup I landed a threesome that included a chick I'd already hooked up with, and her roommate who was half my age at 18-19 years old at the time. The breakup never bothered me again after that night.

However, when I was with her it was great because I love to lead, help, do exciting shit and give wisdom, which is why each girl I was with their future boyfriend says she is best as she learned a lot throught me, but now that she left there is that void which begs the question, how would I go about it?

You can mentor anywhere. They don't have to be women you are fucking if you want to scratch that "teacher/mentor" itch.

[–]visualtech480 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Time heals all wounds blah blah blah. IMO the best way to get over a woman is to get under a few new ones. 3 months...

Pretty solid man hahha, yeah I'll get to work, lift and in a month or two get back to it.

You can mentor anywhere...

Sounds about right, the leadership this is what I'm good at and almost each time there is a group I unconsciously lead the group and they follow, same with most women that like me.

But generally I like to lead woman a lot more that I can see they try and please me, so that is kind of my reward to them, my time and my "protection" and sexual energy.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

It just sucks for awhile. That's the truth. The only reason I am total abundance not giving a fuck 24/7 is because I was totally wrecked when my high school girlfriend broke up with me. Felt the agony of knowing she was fucking other dudes, that she didn't love me anymore, all that shit you need to feel - but I did the work to fill that void with myself and now that guy is with me forever.

You are doing everything right. But, young grasshopper, you must continue to train. If your goal was to shoot 3s, and you were seeing progress by making it in the basket, you wouldn't stop a month in and go "is this really the way to shoot 3s?" Nah, you'd just keep practicing and playing the game. Keep it up.

[–]RStonePT1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Best way to get over heroin is with methadone.

Get out of the books and get into the game. No one is that special, but without enough examples of people you don't know that

[–]VSelf470 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

With all the red and green flags required for an LTR candidate, aren’t we all looking for unicorns? Do you ignore past mistakes if she demonstrates to have corrected them?

For example, I like to party, feel like would be hypocritical of me to look for someone that doesn’t.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nah, you're never looking for an LTR. This is TRP 101. But that doesn't mean the autistic interpretation of "never be in an LTR". It means that you do your thing by being the man, and candidates will make themselves known.

Once you have a list of candidates (who will, inevitably, be looking for your commitment, because Hypergamy Is Monogamy) then you look for complementary features. For example, you would be bored to death by a traditional christian girl who wants your babies. However, there are girls out there who will have coked up monkey sex with you in a club bathroom that are total LTR material....for you.

There is no formula for the perfect girl. There are human beings with flaws out there that you judge and bring into the circle that is Your Awesome Life. Should they stop being a good passenger on that ride, you may toss them as you see fit. This is The Way. Now go forth and slay.

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

https://www.rianstone.com/blog/vetting1

Those stupid vetting lists are all correlated ego invested horse shit. vetting for red and green flags never works, instead, work on your boundaries and enforce them ruthlessly.

A girl with no tattoos will fuck your brother, a girl with a pixie cut may be loyal AF. you won't know that before you meet them and give them the opportunity to have you dump them, then not take you up on the offer

[–]VSelf470 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks for the read. Makes a lot of sense that to just have a list.

[–]lvpvsdacvs0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Do you ignore past mistakes if she demonstrates to have corrected them?

I personally dont. I did it in the past and for me this is a major loss of frame and power.

aren’t we all looking for unicorns?

They do not exist. Even if you go for a LTR, the red pill should make you stay vigilant and relaxed in the same time.

[–]spcparks0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy

I’m 34 and it seems like I get more 19-22 year olds than I have ever before. I actually have more fun with these girls compared to woman 25 and up.

Is it just me or do girls become more bitchy and less fun after 25? I know their biological Clock is ticking and they are trying to secure a suitor, but I can’t enjoy hanging out with girls once they get past 23-24.

They want nothing to Do with me while The college girls are getting more into me. Am I just attracting these girls or are girls past a certain age not even worth wasting time on.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy

Familiar with statistics?

Women who are single after ~25 have high correlation with 1 or more of these other "features":

terrible breakup that leaves them scarred or jaded

mistake the fuckzone for the relationship zone (punch out of their league)

actively seeking to lock down the first thing high value enough to "qualify"

speaking of qualify, has a laundry list of qualifications1

are not worthy of commitment writ large

Just the facts.


(1) This is what I call the Superman effect - women who have had a few relationships with really high value dudes mentally erase all the bad parts, and only remember their best features. She then assembles all these best features with zero flaws into Superman. This is the formula for an alpha widow.

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

This is what I call the Superman effect - women who have had a few relationships with really high value dudes mentally erase all the bad parts, and only remember their best features. She then assembles all these best features with zero flaws into Superman. This is the formula for an alpha widow.

Put it better than I used to. Put another way, the high watermark becomes the new minimum.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Related: the Hedonic Treadmill.

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

For sure.

[–]RStonePT3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

https://heartiste.org/2010/08/12/the-difficulty-of-gaming-women-by-age-bracket/

It's been known for a while now. this was a decade ago

[–]Throwaway5946320 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is a two-part question:

What tip would you give a guy in his early 30s, who just has been diagnosed with ADHD last year, who thinks therapists are mostly beta faggots, but somehow could do with somebody who could speed up the process getting back to his former strength?

Since the last days, I have made many strides in a very positive direction concerning my mental model/mindset related to it.

What ideas/mental mindsets/self-manipulation as RStone mentioned, would be RP conjunct when faced with an ADHD diagnosis? So far I have determined for myself, that the only for me justifiable model handling this is becoming the most disciplined, hard-working and determined guy I am able to manage.

I somehow told myself "Fuck it." the last days and I am feeling better. I have been living these attributes for years yet (gym 5 times a week, waking up at 5 AM and going for a jog, etc.) but they just have carried me so far as where the shit impaired the ability to learn at the same speed as peers in Uni, despite an IQ of 138.

---------------------------------------------------

Pills bring another problem field. I haven't found a way yet to justify them before myself. I feel kinda shit going to psychiatrists or therapists as I come from a rural area where it is shit upon having/doing these kind of things. Haven't found a way around this.

[–]LordG40 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What's your mentality / inner dialogue when you are 1) flirting with women 2) negotiating stuff at work 3) getting in an argument ?

[–]MyRedGlasses0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

How do you respond to getting compliments from women?

Recently I've started to get them, but just brush them off with a "thanks".

[–]Sovereign_Mind0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

entlemen I need some serious help. I have finally decided to admit that I cannot close with a female.

I was in the club last night (or any other night) with my dope custom tapered pants, an extremely tight calvin klein button down that showed my muscles, my diamond studs, and had my hair did. I mean I looked like money.

I had girls smiling at me left and right. I danced with at least 3 for extended periods. Two of them started eating my face and essentially having sex with me with my cloths on. “Oh my god youre so hot” “your muscles are sexy”

No WHY THE FUCK WILL THEY NEVER WANT TO GO BACK TO MY/THEIR PLACE?? I have to be doing something wrong. Is it my clothes? Do I look like a fuckboy?

I neeeed help dude. The walk of shame fucking jerking off after a club sesh like this is unreal.

Alot of people on another forum have told me to change the outift, but I like to stand out from all the losers wearing jeans. Ladies seem to love it too, and it pisses other dudes off.

[–]therealbigoso0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Last week I commented somewhere in the sub that I should play the field right now with the coronavirus in the background by plating more women.

I was wrong. If you, reader, have not figured out your game in normal life conditions, when there is no pandemic, then you have no business trying to be a hero.

I took my friends out to town a couple nights this past weekend. Half of them are nagging me for being so irresponsible. That doesn’t matter, they’re just being bitches.

But nobody plated anyone that night. And now the bars, restaurants and cafes are all closed for the foreseeable future.

Take it smart. Don’t run out into the world during the coronavirus lockdown expecting the game to be the same or something you’re used to. Women are hiding. Men are hiding. Only LTRs and existing plates are having sex right now. Deal with it.

[–]wutanggusa0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

So recently I got burned by a couple of friends and it has really got to me. I know vowing to get them back is a toxic way to live your life and stops you from growing. However I want to be able to protect myself.

Being an outsider has let me read people really well but I am never prepared when those same people then try to get one off of you. A website that helped me really understand women was Girls Chase, honestly life changing and I'm looking for something similar.

I am also due to be starting a job soon and I need to make sure that I am firm from the start. Any ideas?

[–]chickenandrice12310 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is by no means a brag. I wanted to plate a girl but the "problem" is that she said that my dick is too big for her to handle and it is too much of a problem for her. Any advice how to deal with this?

[–]vikas0o70 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I have read the sidebar but I still don't understand what 'FRAME' actually is. somebody care to explain in simpler words?



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