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My ex was seriously the best fuck ever and looked like a porn star. I have been spinning in circles for 6 months and nothing has even come CLOSE to the sex we had. It is seriously depressing. I cannot go back to my ex. What do I do?

Reddit View
March 7, 2020
169 upvotes

When my ex first showed me her boobs, I didn't even know there were boobs that looked like that. They were seriously better than top posts on subreddits here. They felt great, and would get really erect when she was turned on (I didn't know boobs could get boners til I met her, they just got more conical).

And that was just her boobs. Her ass, legs, everything, was out of this world. We had all the same fetishes. She wanted it 10 times a day. I gave it to her 2-6 times, my balls were like raisins and was barely squeezing out drops into her. We had all the same fetishes too.

for various reasons, she went nuts and tried to kill herself in such a way that it would have looked like a homicide had she succeeded (20 floor balcony jump, I had to restrain her from doing it while she was shouting and screaming). I got out and dumped her after staging an intervention with her family and mental health professionals the very next day. She's getting better and wants me back badly but she's bad fucking news. I can't even talk to her without vivid nightmares and flashbacks (diagnosed with PTSD now)

Despite how traumatizing it was, I still fantasize about the sex. It. Was. Phenomenal.

I am desperately trying to find a girl who comes even close but I've through like 5 girls since and it was only at best about 30% as enjoyable as sex was with her. Spinning plates fucking sucks compared to the sex we were having.

What the fuck do I do? I sometimes literally spend hours thinking about it. I have a psych but she doesn't really get it.

What can I do to get over this? I've deleted all her nudes and our sex tapes. But don't know where to go from here. Its been 6 months and every lay I miss her more despite the incredible bullshit I went through.

I fear tremendously that I will cave in eventually. Not just for the sex though, but honestly its a big part of my fears.


Post Information
Title My ex was seriously the best fuck ever and looked like a porn star. I have been spinning in circles for 6 months and nothing has even come CLOSE to the sex we had. It is seriously depressing. I cannot go back to my ex. What do I do?
Author -DeadLock
Upvotes 169
Comments 188
Date 07 March 2020 02:17 AM UTC (12 months ago)
Subreddit askTRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/353001
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/feoj40/my_ex_was_seriously_the_best_fuck_ever_and_looked/
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Comments

[–]CochinoChingon95 points96 points  (0 children) | Copy

"Fuck crazy all you want, never date crazy. And if you do date crazy, *never redate** an ex*" — My Father

[–][deleted] 197 points198 points  (12 children) | Copy

Time. For your own sanity, you must never go back. She will take you down with her. Keep hitting the gym, plates, etc. and time will lessen the wound. I know what you mean. I had somebody like this 20 years ago and I still think about her from time to time. Keep looking forward to new conquests, never look back.

[–]spliezer25 points26 points  (4 children) | Copy

so you never found someone that even comes close? i’m in same position as op and not finding someone as good is a huge fear of mine. i can go a year, two... but 20 years and still thinking about a girl i used to fuck because i couldn’t find anyone better scares the shit outta me

[–]Chi-Cam63 points64 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dude you can and will remember stuff that’s life just don’t let it effect your present. Move on. I hope in 20 years you won’t be dwelling on a women you had sex with not that she was a amazing person but because she sucked your dick. Hopefully you have some kids and a nice women who supports your dreams and goals. You brothas need to elevate spiritually it seems.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

You misunderstood. I reminisce out of fondness however I don’t live in the past. I have the wisdom to see it would have never worked out. I’ve slain over 100/200+ since then (I’ve lost count). I understand the youthful bravado you’re coming from. There have been many others as well who were just as amazing as well.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That's exactly how I felt while in the relationship too. But even at that it was still better to break up.

[–]HotelMohelHolidayInn3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

someone as good

Because you've never had anything else.

[–]CaptainFajita8 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy

Exactly this. I had a redhead about like that 25 years ago. Looks, body, zany-fun personality, who was easily the best I've ever been with and seriously wore me out. No other woman I've known before or since even comes close (and there have been quite a few). Thought about her and experienced the pain for years afterward. At the time, I had not yet found my mission but when I eventually did, I finally began to heal up.

I ran into her a few months ago, and the years have not been kind. Looked like she'd gained 75 pounds, walked all bent over, and her personality had turned all hard and sarcastic. Like the saying goes; trying to get a relationship back is like digging through the trash. You may succeed for a while, but it'll be damaged and never as good as you remember.

[–]dzmisrb430 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Just digging to top posts last month so sorry for late question.

Was she teen back then?

Maybe that's why you have such a found memories

[–]CaptainFajita1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Nope. She was 40 and I was 35. Tall and willowy, perfectly flat stomach, very intelligent, borderline nymphomaniac, strikingly good natural artist, among several other considerable talents.

I didn't discover TRP until about 10 years after. Had a few girls before her, and quite a number after, and she's still easily number one.

[–]dzmisrb431 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Very interesting.

Kind of gives me hope in a wired way.

After seeing incles saying teens are only girls worth anything and how it's over after you get old enough to not be able to smash 16 year old teens.

[–]its-mystery1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You time to time thinking about someone from 20 years make me very paranoid about emotions

[–]toastismost0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What are platez?

[–]PythonInterp0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I was all set to tell this guy to fuck her but keep her at a distance, till I read the story, then I was like, "Nope, stay away."

Try to get her parents to help her as best you can.

[–]wheremyballsgo177 points178 points  (14 children) | Copy

Don't stick your dick in crazy kids...

[–][deleted] 336 points337 points  (11 children) | Copy

in crazy, kids*

[–]ChadBreeder180 points81 points  (4 children) | Copy

Very few people appreciate the comma that is supposed to come before addressing someone. This is why it is important.

[–]Cachecash24 points25 points  (0 children) | Copy

It’s the difference between “let’s eat, Grandma” and “let’s eat Grandma!”

[–]huey7644 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

My english 101 class taught me to use a comma to indicate direct address and this might be the only time it might come in handy.

For example, "I think you are wrong Eric"

Needs a comma after wrong. Otherwise, Eric doesnt know you are addressing him

[–]ChadBreeder113 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes. That is the point of what we are talking about...

[–]TheDeadlyZebra4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

"I think you are the wrong Eric"

[–]matti__mo16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

Very important comma

[–]mickenrorty5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

in, crazy kids

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Well said lad

[–]drcube20004 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't stick your dick in kids regardless of their mental health.

[–]wheremyballsgo1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lmao I edited it and put it then didn't save the change. Figured it worked either way

[–]BlamingBuddha16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse and helping your uncle jack off a horse.

Or wait...

[–]theUnBannableHulk8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes crazy kids should be avoided.

I'd say kids in general bro but what do we know

🤣

[–]Nuwanda20629 points30 points  (0 children) | Copy

Key words here are: “I am desperately...”

[–]SalporinRP53 points54 points  (12 children) | Copy

a lot of girls can get to that point of freakiness, but sometimes you gotta train them lol.

That being said I understand what you mean about the pornstar body thing though. I dated a girl in college who was the same way. DD tits, insane ass, skinny waist, etc. Took me like 2 years to fuck a girl with a body as good as hers lol

[–]-DeadLock[S] 16 points17 points  (11 children) | Copy

Did it bother you as much as it does for me? Do you just cope with having not so good sex now?

[–]SalporinRP39 points40 points  (10 children) | Copy

I was slightly annoyed by it at times, but my ex was a crazy bitch so I was glad to be rid of her.

And while a pornstar body is good a lot of hot girls fucking suck in bed.

Best sex I've ever had was a fwb situation I had senior year of college with a pale skinny girl with b cups and barely any ass (not my type whatsoever). Except she was enthusiastic as fuck about sex, gave pornstar-esque sloppy head, and had absolutely insane cowgirl skills.

You're still riding off of the emotional and physical high that was your ex. It's like cutting off an addiction. Give it a few more months.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 10 points11 points  (9 children) | Copy

Yeah OK, thats true when I think about it, I've been getting far better at getting over her these past 6 months. It's just that at 6 I still hate that I miss it but maybe you're right just give it a bit more time and maintain no contact. She was a thoroughly nutty woman tbh.

My PTSD was a bulwark in forcing me not to contact her but it's dissipating now and has caused a fresh wave of longing for those experiences we had. But your words are true, I will just have to continue a grieving process that was interrupted by the PTSD.

Never had any insane cowgirl skills or good head so that makes me feel good that theres still stuff out there other girls can show me.

Thanks. Glad I didn't reach out to her this week..

[–]_the_shape_33 points34 points  (8 children) | Copy

Your main issue is as clear as daylight to me: you're focused on the wrong goal. I'll get back to this point in a minute, but first let me begin by recognizing that it's completely understandable to desire another woman as mindblowing as you describe your ex following a breakup, but keeping your sights set on scoring another hit of the dragon prime piece of ass will drive you absolutely mad and will bring you closer to your own destruction in due time. Look at how you're admitting that despite how toxic this woman is, your insatiable lust for her body has you second-guessing yourself, how whatever voice of reason you have within you is in danger of being drowned out so you can grovel back and have her hole(s) send you to nirvana just.one.more.time. (or so you keep telling yourself)

I had an ex years ago that was a solid 7 overall, nice, tight little body, small perky tits, great curvy ass, but Jesus Christ, that pvssy was handcrafted by God Himself, and together with her obsession for my D, constantly blowing up my phone with her deepest fantasies about what she wanted me to do to her, the earth-shattering orgasms the both of us would get out of our scorching-hot sessions, the squirting, the way she'd downright worship me in and out of the bedroom - well, speaking of Jesus, it wasn't long before she had me convinced I too could walk on water. To make a long-story short, that incredibly addictive gravy train came to an end after a full year-long ride, and then the depression set in. I've had many girls after her, and there definitely have been one or two who were better overall lays when you factor everything else in, but that immaculate pvssy of my ex's still, in her own way, has her at the very top of my all-time list, even after all these years. It's all good though, and let me explain why now by returning to how I began this response.

It wasn't until much later, after many sleepless nights, after wasting God knows how many hours obsessively wondering where she was, if she was banging someone else already, if there was more than one other guy, if she was enjoying them more than she enjoyed me etc., that I slowly began to realize the pathetic stupidity of the sort of questions I was asking, and that longing for either her or a replacement that could either match or surpass her was completely misguided and only going to lead me right back to a pit of all-consuming misery and despair. My man, you must desire with all your will and might to be liberated of these cravings and to laugh at them even. This must be your new goal, your goal of all goals: to escape the prison your own lust has built up and you yourself have willingly walked into and are currently trying with all your might not to return to.

This girl (and the next hot piece of ass to catch your eye and/or to make your eyes roll back in the sack) own you (yes, a girl you've never even met yet owns you) because you do not own yourself. This entire post of your's is a testament to that observation.

"What do I do?", you ask? You shut her out, completely, and you remind yourself that you are not the only one who's been in similar shoes, but that you currently stand at a crossroad: to follow the path of the countless suckers who couldn't control their compulsions, who lacked the self-restraint and self-respect to avoid defiling themselves in exchange for one more shot of heroin piece of a (deranged) 'goddess', or to choose the path of those who chose peace of mind, sanity, and respect for self instead and kept their foot on the gas until nothing could be seen in the rearview and all they were left with were a handful of fond memories they could smile at from time to time.

[–]garydelrey2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Solid.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This is rock fucking solid. This is exactly it. What I was looking for. Thanks for writing that up. I'm saving it.

[–]oooKenshiooo1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

Lust, in and of itself doesn't seem altogether terrible, however it exists along an axiomatic path toward Ego-enslavement and is antithetical to self-discipline. It blissfully pulls you into your shadow self and ensnares you with a siren song that opens the gateway for all of it's sister-sins extant along the axiom of greed, and reckless self-abandonment.

Leave it on the "other side of the cross" if you wish to have inner calm, self-discipline, and contentment.

Or

Cave in to its allure and wonder why your life starts spiralling out of (self)control.

This is the Truth of the cross, buried deeply behind dogma, allegory, and metaphor.

Homey that wrote the post im placing this comment under "Gno"s what he's talking about.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (2 children) | Copy

as clear as daylight, you're focused on the wrong

it's understandable, desire (is) mindblowing, but your sights (are) set on scoring another hit of the dragon; your own destruction

You're admitting this insatiable lust has you second-guessing your self('s) voice of reason; being drowned to nirvana

Jesus Christ, God self

obsession fantasies her,

she'd worship me

speaking of Jesus,I could walk on water. That incredibly addictive gravy train came to an end, then depression set in.

Immaculate pvssy

God knows I was longing for a misguided pit of all-consuming misery and despair.

desire to be liberated

This must be your new goal: escape the prison you willingly walked into.

own yourself.

This post is a testament.

remind your self you stand at a cross: (Continue to) follow the path of the countless suckers who couldn't control their self; to avoid defiling themselves in exchange for one more shot of heroin piece of a (deranged) 'goddess', or to choose the path of those who chose peace of mind, sanity, and respect for self instead and smile at from time to time.

There you go bro, I removed the extra words. Brevity and such.

[–]_the_shape_0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

"There you go bro, I removed the extra words. Brevity and such."

The real unsung hero in all of that "editing" was your Autism

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nope. Its just demystifying the statement. Its revealing the buddhist-christian message hidden beneath colorful vernacular, which itself is a manifestation of the ego's pride.

I dont blame you for churching it up, egos cant handle Jesus, because they cant handle the Truth.

(See what i did there?)

As you were writing the original comment, did you ever stop and ask yourself why you were making so many references to buddhist and christian concepts, or was it entirely Freudian?

I mean, if you really wanna break it down even further, christianity and buddhism at the conceptual level is just describing the innate wisdom of humanity telling us to embolden the self, and mute the ego, because the ego is a faggoty, insatiable, little thing that will lead us into our own little hell.

[–]AllTay6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Iron Rule of Tomassi #7
It is always time and effort better spent developing new, fresh, prospective women than it will ever be in attempting to reconstruct a failed relationship. Never root through the trash once the garbage has been dragged to the curb. You get messy, your neighbors see you do it, and what you thought was worth digging for is never as valuable as you thought it was.

If you haven’t gone no contact, do it. Now.

We’ve all fucked crazy, check my recent posts - I’m not perfect and have made some bitch made slip ups even recently. I chose to cut the limb off rather than continue sticking my dick in BPD - everyday I get further away from it and move towards new life experiences.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

Damn reading that gave me a stiffy.

[–]yadigggggggggg21 points22 points  (4 children) | Copy

Good thing women are malleable, pal.

Train a plate to fuck how you want her to fuck.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 16 points17 points  (2 children) | Copy

I can't keep my high SMV plates in line. I have one high SMV plate but she's like kind of awkward or something and not really sex driven. Just doesn't have a sexy personality.

Had another very kinky and high SMV one and things were going well but she suddenly ghosted me

The PTSD also makes it hard to meet women. I have to go more slowly. Harder to make a sexual bond too. Working on it and its going well enough though.

Luckily my own SMV is very high but unfortunately it seems that once your SMV goes past a certain point you attract a lot of mentally ill women maybe?

I don't get out much honestly, but I seem to meet a potential plate almost everytime I do.

edit: holy fuck after posting this I messaged the kinky hot one about why she ghosted me and she said she thought we were in a relationship and ghosted me when I didn't reach out to her for a month. I am a hot mess.

[–]Snowaey4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

You really need to stop meeting crazy chicks, seriously.

[–]Senior Endorseddr_warlock2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

The hottest women often do not grow up with stable mental faculties because of the 24/7 rockstar validation, pampering, and pussypasses they had since puberty. Never had to work for a thing in her life and has a permanent safety net.

When a child needs discipline, they will go to the other parent to see if theyll give them a free pass. Both parents usually team up and say "what did your mom/dad say?" This is not the case for men. There are ALWAYS spineless chumps in zombie hordes that will let her do whatever she wants. They are legion. So you try to handle things, She just bounces back to the doormat hordes for 'safety'.

Too many options for them. Always need backups. Rich people have to insulate them in a cocoon of money and luxury to keep them in line. Even that doesnt work sometimes.

[–]wyota1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Its usually like attracts like. Of she's easily malleable, she's just low IQ.

[–]BlamingBuddha6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Did you have all the same fetishes too though?

[–]carb0ncl1mber6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

You can’t teach a plate passion. You can’t teach a plate eagerness. You can’t teach a plate innate sexual desire. I feel like anyone who says you can has no idea what they’re talking about. Some girls just love sex and know how to fuck, and others don’t. Even if you show them what you like, they’re always doing it for you, and never with the same interest as if they were fully loving it themselves. And the difference is everything.

[–]oooKenshiooo3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yes and no.

There are ways to turn pretty much any girl into an eager fuck doll. How ever it is less a process of teaching and more of a breaking /unlocking of psychological barriers. It is an art and a science.

[–]W_O_M_B_A_T38 points39 points  (13 children) | Copy

Oooof. This is pretty cringeworthy to read. This is some Gone Girl -type shit.

Look, it's normal to feet knee-jerk fantasies about going back to an abusive controlling relationship. This is Taught-Helplessness.

I'm sure she was a hot item, but your fantasies about her have nothing to do with her looks, really.

Sounds like you're not ready for sex that's genuine. Because your ex sure the hell wasn't.

Let that sink in a little bit. Remember that porn isn't exciting because it's real. If it's too good to be true it usually is.

She didn't "look" like anything. Putting on a porn show is exactly what she was doing every time.

Nobody is horny 10 times a day. But if you're a soulless fake bitch with severe power issues and zero guilt or remorse.....

Anyways, it was an act she perfomed because she liked the power over you it created and liked how weak and shitfucked it made you act, so you would never question her. Even now still you sound like a retard just talking about her. That was her goal, to destroy any ability for you to question her or defy her, and replacing those impulses with gobbledygook.

Make no mistake about this part. And pretty soon she decided to go for broke and give you the ultimate cucking.

And oh baby were you eager to give her power.

[–]carb0ncl1mber14 points15 points  (10 children) | Copy

If they have BPD sex is validation and they want it all the time.

[–]Zero-Milk6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

Underrated comment.

Borderline Personality Disorder (and other variants of narcissistic personality types) is a very common thing to see in today's fucked-up world, but yet somehow it's only talked about in certain circles. It should be highlighted, front-and-center, in today's conversations about interpersonal relationships, because it's the main "crazy" component that people are referring to when they say never to stick your dick in crazy.

Sure, the sex will probably be magical and addictive and unlike any you've ever had, but the damage the rest of the relationship will cause to your mental health ultimately makes the whole thing something you should RUN from.

Edit: more to your point though, you're right. They use sex as validation because in a great number of cases, their sexual identity is their ONLY identity, and without it they are nobody. So they have to be constantly reassured that they are sexually desirable as often (and by as many people) as possible.

[–]carb0ncl1mber2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Concur with all the above. Like some I experienced it first hand and was lucky to get out with minimal damage.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

People cant handle removing the veil and addressing issues directly, uncandidly.

Red pill needs a 2nd level ill heretofore refer to as "redpilled-redpill"because apparently this shit has been largely infiltrated by faggots looking to provide themselves a cheat code they can stabilize their immediate crisis with, so they can comfortably return to deluding themselves while gobbling up the lie that they're different now.

[–]Zero-Milk0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're honestly not wrong, man. It seems to me that's what happens to any movement nowadays whose foundation is rooted in sensibility. Smart-alecks show up, learn a thing or two but remain largely undisciplined, and then co-opt the movement and decide that they're now going to be ambassadors for it. Talk about bad PR.

Just keep on being the good example and it won't really matter how many LARPers come to the party, because at least you'll know you've done right by yourself and by the people you touch.

[–]EdvardMunch0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

I dated one of these. It ended when I didnt get a boner once and she screamed and cried.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Yeah stuff like this would happen. She got mad once at christmas when I wouldn't go to the bathroom at my families house and film myself cumming. I got about halfway and was like fuck this and she whined about it not being fair to her.

She wouldn't really flip out or anything but got seriously pouty when I didn't give in to her hypersexual demands.

[–]EdvardMunch0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah, ive seen this a lot from girls. I guess its deep insecurity that drives the need to have this much power. Hell I think much of the "i want to be choked and dominated" to non dom types is a similar power grab.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

She was majorly into that too. I'm so glad I posted to this sub because that's a big revelation that she was using sex to have power over me. That's a game changer.

[–]EdvardMunch0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah dude, its a tough one to notice sometimes. I think it seems like heaven to some degree when you finally meet that girl down for whatever whenever.

But my ex began to watch every move I made, where my eyes wondered. She'd bite her nails nervously all the time. But the pressure fucked up my sex life some time after we broke up. Mostly when it came to intimate sex not fucking.

[–]_-resonance-_-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

if they have BPD, sex*

[–]mr_dannyocean8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is the correct answer that aligns with my experiences similar to OP

[–]CooHwip80 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

OP, this is the best reply in the thread.

[–]Rock_Granite6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

The crazy ones always have/give the best sex

[–]lolomotif125 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is a serious case of oneitus, it will pass. Just think with your head and not your dick. You've had your turn, now move on.

[–]Folknust15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy

Take your mind off her. Go to the gym or hang out with friends.

[–]Don_Pon4 points5 points  (8 children) | Copy

Find a really good psych, you need help. Meditate bro that will help but may be difficult

[–]-DeadLock[S] -1 points0 points  (7 children) | Copy

Thanks. Luckily I have a chad tier job and am using some of the best psychological services in the country.

[–]matti__mo14 points15 points  (6 children) | Copy

You keep saying “high smv” “best sex” “hb10 (the way you described her)” “Chad level job” yet you are really struggling. It seems to me you have this “idealistic” view of yourself that may or may not be true, but the amount of obsession/anxiety/other negatives while letting a crazy girl give you fucking ptsd... i can see someone you love [read: obsessed over] causing you emotional discomfort on a suicide attempt but this should never ever ever cause you stress levels that rival a veteran who saw comrades blow up in front of them in the Middle East... it’s a bitch bro. Don’t put this much pressure on yourself, time heals all wounds, em we’ve all lost insanely hot chicks for one reason or another.

P.S. Chad wouldn’t get ptsd over a psychotic girl, or even write this post.. there is no “Chad-level job” whatever that would even mean. Write about the issue at hand instead of humble bragging to anonymous internet ppl

[–]Livecrazyjoe6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

No kidding, I've been through some fucked up shit in my life. Never had a crazy bitch give me ptsd.

[–]-DeadLock[S] -2 points-1 points  (4 children) | Copy

honestly im just being over the top on purpose with that verbiage.

Also PTSD is a spectrum. I never said I have the same kind of PTSD as a war vet that is just you pushing your pre-conceived notions of the illness onto my situation.

For everything else honestly you are just projecting here buddy.

[–]matti__mo3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

I tried my best to make my point, under no circumstances should you get back with her. I had a legal issue with a girl that was complete bs that nearly had serious ramifications: broke my shit, assaulted me, told me she was going to tell the cops I tried to kill her and pulled a weapon on her - moral of the story is never try after that.. this is coming from someone who did after a ton of apologies and chalking it up to being drunk.

If they can do it drunk, they can do it sober. If they’re even capable of that run for the fucking hills my man and never look back. This girl was a total babe too and amazing sex; super fun to do shit with; but after something like that save yourself

[–]-DeadLock[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

Thanks for sharing. I appreciate it. This thread is really driving it home that I must not get back with her. You are right. I got drunk last night and thought of messaging her and then passed out. I had the worse nightmare yet. Like a Japanese horror movie.

It was years later and we got back together, she said she got a good job and was doing well for herself, said she had her own house. We called back and forth for months, and I flew over to spend time in her house.

The house was abandoned, like for 100 years, rotten walls, caving ceiling, told me to come downstairs. Waded through rotten stagnant maggot water, dark green shitty rotten walls and no electricity. She was sitting on top of a rusty half submerged laundry machine in the darkness. Leaned in and said "hello again honey" and her face was fucked. Basically a corpse.

Yeah. Thats my brain telling me to NOT do it. I hear you. I just need to forget about it as best I can.

[–]Anonymous2k180 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

That’s probably God telling you to stay away from her. If you believe in God... I would consider it being a message regardless.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It may be. I cant be sure. But I'm taking it as a sign. It could be my brain trying to make a monster out of her so I stay away from her too. Either way it makes no difference.

[–]laserdicks5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

You're already thinking with the right head. She is replaceable. They all are.

[–]beginner_2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

We should coin a new term. Instead of alpha widow, Crazy widower.

[–]_-resonance-_0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

The classification helps. Harping on the feelings/situation may simply be a symptom of being a Crazy-widower.

[–]2319Skew2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yea. Not going to read that wall of text.

Most guys here were in love, dating/engaged/married or banging someone that they put on a pedestal and were hurt when it fell through.

Each one of those men existed before that pussy and will exist afterwards. Let it hurt then move the fuck forward.

Your story isn't unique.

[–]trpSenator2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You’re obsession with getting back to that level of sex is really strange. Sex shouldn’t be the center of your world but you treat it as such.

[–]ReasonablyGoodMexica3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Look here OP. First, 5 women since your ex is barely any women and 6 months is barely any time. 5 year marriage ended 3 years ago and just a few months ago I stopped dreaming about her.

Do remember that while she sounds amazing, right now and specially in the future, she's likely going to be a product of your imagination: The PERFECT fucking bitch. Don't be fooled. She had flaws, you just don't remember them because you miss the sex. In my case, it was the exact opposite, I missed everything except the sex, yet both yours and mine were crazy.

Give it time. I still haven't found a woman on her level, but because I know I'm just not in the same shape I was back then, so it's only a matter of time and effort. Hell, and back then I didn't even KNOW I had a choosing when it came to women.

You look at yourself and think what can you do to get a woman that you like and do the work. The rest is just healing.

Think of food. You need it for survival, but you can never again taste the meals grandma made. Her food is lost forever but you live on. Best you can do is remember her fondly.

[–]L2diy6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

All these dudes in these comments are thirsty cucks. You did it once, you can do it again, this time try to find a bitch that won’t put you on trial for homicide. Go lift and game better

[–]bakachelera2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Get a virgin and teach her how to fuck. Man up.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

You sound like a damn widower. Either move on or Sid and Nancy until one of you ends up dead or in prison.

[–]AshyBoneVR42 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Let me tell you, ain't no sex like crazy bitch sex. It's fuckin AMAZING. And for some reason, the girls with the best bodies come with thee most fucked up past and baggage. You sound like you might have Oneitis, but at the same time, its very likely that she was as good as you're making her out to seem. Give it time and just keep reminding yourself that there's GONNA be someone that you meet that's going to be able to take her place in your heart and in your pants.

First thing you gotta do is stop comparing every chick you meet to her. Sex is sex. Stop thinking about how it matches up to fucking your ex. Just enjoy having sex when you can get it. If that doesn't work, take some time to clear your head. You're still in the hurting process. Even if it's six months, you need to give yourself some more time.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you.

[–]EdvardMunch2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Everyone should consider this is not a dating problem or a woman problem but a drug problem.

You're struggling with great highs you can no longer match, and truth is you likely never will especially by comparison. Maybe its a reason not to stick your dick in crazy because crazy is often the best sex you'll ever have (im not sure what this says ultimately). But few of us want to get addicted to heroin though its likely amazing.

We've all fallen from points of great pleasure. I really hate to say it but nothing in this life is given, you must appreciate what you have and look to that. Maybe you find a new kind of high in something else.

[–]wowkwo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

ding ding ding, it's that dopamine rush with some bad bitches that you just aren't always going to get with most women.

Accepting that it's gone and moving forward in life is tough, but there's always more out there in this world.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

No sex is that good. You're in love with her.

[–]CrackDaMarco0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That's why he's in love with her.

[–]Besthater1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

LISTEN HERE: your ex likely had a cluster B personality disorder.

They by definition are over sexualised, and they are unstable. Let me guess: she had no sense of shame or guilt, she loves attention, she thought you are going to leave or abandon her, she made you feel like the greatest person on earth for moments and then she made you feel like the worst. How am I doing? Suicide attempts are very common for them. Mine had razor scars on her wrists that were "from falling off a roof".....

You just need to realise that only crazy people fuck like that and most of them work in porn. This is because they can only act sane for short periods.

It will probably hurt because you found someone who gets you, but the reality is, she figured out what you like and acted FOR you. It went cold like it does. Sorry to hear that you had to deal with the person, but fuck yeah, the sex....wow.

Go look up borderline personality disorder, see how many check boxes you can tick.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I've know people with BPD quite closely and she only showed some BPD tendencies. She was quite sweet, never raised her voice or anything. But she was also quite manipulative and lying came easy to her, if only to avoid disagreements. There was like a 3 week period that she just got more and more crazy everyday it was the fastest mental spiral I've ever seen.

I don't doubt that she has some cluster B type thing but what was shocking is that I was already familiar with those traits glaringly. Cant say I didn't ignore red flags though.

[–]babybopp1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

OP let me learn you something here.

We all have been through crazy girls. There is a reason why BPD is specifically mentioned in TRP. They are truly a mans downfall. The crazy factor is very appealing to a guys sense of adventure but i guarantee you that it is not worth it. Learn how to suppress your desire to stick it in crazy. These girls go scorched earth and many guys have fallen because of them. I will give you my story but first some famous examples.

The Game, a successful rapper that slays pussy. For some stupid reason or bad advice, he decided to "settle" down and get a woman to marry. He did this by getting a reality elimination game show. Why? for fucks sake i dont know. I watched the entire season. (had no choice as i was stuck in a foreign place with no wifi and one of our group members had it on flash drive) There was this one girl called priscilla. The very definition of crazy. she was latina with a nice body and ass. She was like short with a semi pretty face. But she was legit crazy. Flipping shit and fighting for no reason without an OFF switch.

IF YOU CANT TURN OFF YOUR WOMAN WHEN SHE FLIPS AND YOUR VOICE CANT REACH HER, YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS BEING WITH HER.

He had chances to eliminate her but kept her around for her crazy. The red flags were there, highs and lows within few seconds. So he decided to take her for a solo date. next episode, she is magically gone with no mention of her at all. Turns out he grabbed her ass and she flipped out and said he tried to rape her. That he grabbed her by the pussy without consent. Dude of course kicked her out the show and moved on. Something he has probably done hundreds of times. Thing is, she didnt move on and saw this as a cash cow moment. She filed rape with the cops and sued him. He ignored her as a crazy bitch. The courts tried to get him to come 47 times he just didnt give a fuk. Jury passed judgement in absentia for guess how much...$7 FUCKING MILLION DOLLARS. He owed her legally 7 million. His life has been a shit show where he has been hiding money and moving it around. She just won the rights to take his royalties from his music till her debt is paid. During the show, you could see that he was acting because his Mom wanted him to settle down. Now he is in a shit show with a girl taking his lifes work over an allegation that h grabbed her at a bar in the ass.

I too thought that i could settle down. Drop my plates and play daddy with 2.5 kids. Met this girl who i fucked on the first date. I should have dropped her then and there. Ended up having her stay over for days at my place. The sex was good and available. Then the red flags started showing when i could not get her to turn off with an argument over some shit. I ignored even after she told me she was on meds for depression and some other shit. Continued the fuckfest because it was good. Then she flipped out on day and literally put her life in danger. Screaming and scratching her face. i saw the devil man. She then called the cops and said i was assaulting her. She did not realize that I was recording her the whole time. I was almost arrested save my video. Of course they just got her an uber and let her go. Found out later she had been fucking multiple dudes raw. after I dropped her like a stone and moved on.

Count yourself lucky you got away with it. pussy aint worth it like that. you know it. It wasnt her pussy that was good, it was the crazy you were addicted to.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Thanks man. That waa very sobering. Thanks for sharing your story.

[–]babybopp0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

you will miss her for a few weeks then it will ebb away. dont maintain any form of contact with her. rip the band aid. find a hobby, get into exercise. find new girls and fuck a few. stay away from booze.

[–]its-mystery1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Emotions take the sex to next level. When you feel like that about someone else, sex will be as good again

[–]lozboss1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This isn't abundance mentality OP. This is stage 10 Oneitis.

Do not go back down that hole. Leave it for other poor fucker to die in.

[–]covertpenguin33901 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your problem is you expect to be 100% over someone you were obsessed with in a matter of months. Brain doesn’t work like that... for my college ex who was similar though only a solid 8/10, it took years to truly get over her (tho we did some on and off again after). You can’t keep comparing everyone to her especially just the positives. Just casually date for another year or so and eventually that obsession that’s locked into your brain with chemicals will subside. Take this time to develop your friend and family relationships instead of worrying about romantic ones. Also realize that finding 9-10/10s who fuck like porn stars is a multi year quest for most of us decent looking guys minus the god tier ones. My SMV finally peaked after breaking up with my last ex due to having a baller job and looking pretty decent. After a year and 50-70 tinder dates i finally found someone worthy of even dating that would stick around. Lower your expectations on how long it’ll be and you’ll save some grief. Accept that for now you won’t be fucking a porn star for a while because 99% of men don’t ever get to and those that do still don’t do it often unless they’re celebrities

[–]RevolutionaryPea71 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is the danger with fucking girls with an SMV that you can't maintain. Personally I only bother with women with lower SMV than me. It's just not worth the trouble to try to get hotter women.

But quite honestly what you need to do is stop watching porn. Stop visiting those subreddits with boobs. All boobs are great but you can't enjoy them because you're thinking about other boobs. Stop it.

[–]deville053 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You need to lower your expectations to move on cuz you are stuck. And while yr at it, get some therapy

[–]Merica9113 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm calling bullshit here.

Was the sex that good? Or you just Fantasizing about her body (tits, ass, etc)? Because not once did you mention how the sex was good.

OK, you fucked to every last drop you had inside of you, but maybe that's only because you're ultra attractive to her. And maybe it was the best sex you ever had and my rebottle is, you just haven't fuck enough girls.

The point I'm trying to make is, I've been there bro. I said the same shit UNTIL I'm dealing with the next best thing. You just haven't been around the block to realize life works in funny ways.

But remember this, work on being a magnet in certain things you want, not just flat out search for the next best chick and try to take her. Life is about the process, not just about the celebration. Sex all day is about the celebration. Nothing wrong with sex. We all love it. But just think just 2 years from now in how your life will be if you no longer had to work on you? and every hour on the hour, you had to ram your dick into this girl. Not only would it get old quick but other elements of your life will fall apart. It's the fire inside people that keeps them going leading having their shit together.

Imagine your body 2 years from now that you no longer felt like you had to workout because you got it on automatic fucking the hottest chick? You'll be complacent bro. Also imagine everyday was your birthday, and everyday you got home from work your friends and family threw a party at night for ya with birthday cake. First you will love it, of course. Slowly after now you're used to it and it no longer excites you, it becomes the daily norm. Then, it was slowly start to aggravate you because you'll slowly start to have a different agenda in life and a daily birthday party keeps getting in your way and all you now want to say is tell everyone to get the fuck out so you can work on your purpose.

You have lots to learn kid. You didn't realize the fact that people (especially women) change in body type they get older. But you wouldn't know that because you're not older yet and that's OK. Just be patients, it will all make sense at the end.

Chaos isn't a pit. Chaos is a ladder. Many who try to climb it fail and never get to try it again. The fall breaks them. And some are given a chance to climb. They refuse. They cling to the realm or the gods or love. Illusions. Only the ladder is real. The climb is all there is.

[–]roman997895 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

You're fucked. Once you have sex that good nothing else will do. I had a similar experience 17 years ago, I still dream about it, and I've been with over 60 women. This girl's pussy gripped along my entire shaft and seemed to suck the cum out of me. I could even stay hard inside her after cumming. I must stop writing now, I need to jack off...

[–]letmereadthatshit6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't fap bro

[–]ChadBreeder12 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy

That’s crazy that you fucked the best girl on planet earth, OP. Or maybe, you just don’t have abundance mindset and also have a severe case of oneitis? Naa couldn’t be that. You probably just fucked the best girl on planet earth. What are the odds?

[–]CrackDaMarco2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

More likely he found a crazy bitch to fulfil his porn addiction fantasies. Something about Freud in there too.

[–]DF-RP0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Completely missing the point. Just because you don't get good pussy doesn't mean you need to be bitch online trying to drag others down.

[–]ChadBreeder14 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

What I said are two core RP principles. Abundance mindset and not getting oneitis. I understand that you missed the whole point of this sub though.

[–]DF-RP-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Dude has multiple girls going since then. Clearly not a problem of abudance. He also dropped the girl himself - does that sound like oneitis for you?

Problem of girls being absolute stunners and superb in the sack but absolutely full of red flags otherwise to the point you don't want to deal with them clearly isn't familiar to you.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I dont watch porn. I've always avoided it even as a kid cause watching other people fuck each other will make a voyeur cuck out of you eventually.

[–]DF-RP1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Interesting theory, but ultimately wrong I believe. It's extermely hard to find males who do not watch porn, yet I have hard time believe that close to 100% of the guys in the society are voyeur cucks.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Not full blown but I'd say most men have some subtle cuck tendencies these days without noticing it.

[–]StephenHawkingsEars1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

You can train plates. You’ll find a bitch with an equally hot body. But DO NOT sacrifice your mental health for sex. It’s not worth the anxiety and paranoia that will come with it.

[–]spliezer0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

but what if NOT fucking someone as hot as my ex is affecting my mental health

[–]themummypersonified1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Fix your inner game.

[–]styxus901 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds a lot like my borderline ex gf. First of all, this is NOT as special as you think. Actually quite common with how crazy chicks are these days. You are like an addict right now, and sound like one too. The reason is that this type of behavior,may it be hot/cold, crazy/same, whatever you want to call it... it IS fucking addictive.

You need to get a grasp on reality first. For example, you talk about her reasons for going mad. I would wager you live in her construct, her narrative of reality. Would I for example have bought into the narrative of my ex... damn man, I would be Columbine killer level bad. And I never hurt someone really.

So snap out if it. Go and collect some information about crazy chicks. Seeing perfect descriptions of my "oh so unique and special and irreplaceable" girl on youtube really put things into perspective for me. Try watching stuff about borderline (bdp) or female narcissists. Bonus points if the video comes from within the manosphere or somewhere with a similar philosophy.

That being said, I sympathize. Such chicks can really break you mentally. I hope you snap out of it, I really do, but you first need to face reality and stop hiding in your fantasy world. Good luck.

[–]l_PROMETHEUS_l0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Give me her number or go back and keep fucking her

[–]drunken-_-redditor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You’re putting her on a pedestal Bc she has good sex. Sex is amazing but not the only thing that will keep you happy. Let’s say this girl was yours forever. You would get bored of her body eventually. You got a good fuck pick it up and keep moving.

[–]Thatjuansailor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Learn to control your emotions and impulses. Dopamine fast will do the job along with some meditation practices.

[–]cactushatter0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Dude pm me. SAME exact story for me. It’s insane. I got through it.

[–]The_Adm0n0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're thinking with the wrong head.

SHE TRIED TO GET YOU FRAMED FOR MURDER.

[–]schrono0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Pump and dump her every now and then

[–]sparusaurata0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It's not love, it's abuse in denial. She sounds toxic as hell. Probably npd/bdp? Go no contact (which means DON'T contact her, not don't contact her as much). Give it 6 months, chill out, keep busy, skip women for a bit and work on yourself, sounds like you are in need of centering yourself again. Reboot required.

[–]falconiawillfall0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Man this reminds me of my first gf, chick had the best tits of any girl I've fucked to this day. Took me awhile to get over her but it was my first relationship and I was still semi-BP. She wasn't psycho though lol.

[–]gen100 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You fucked a next gen AI Cyborg. Nothing will compare.

[–]SidMRP0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Not being funny here, but you can't share a story like that without sharing a nude. Crop her face out.

[–]LostInVayne0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly my dude. See the thing about all of this is that you can literally rationalize how great her body is however you want. Just him posting about this, I could literally rationalize 4 girls that I know just on the top of my head that "look"/feel like her. It's all just a mental masturbation. No girl is perfect or special, this dude is just head over heals for this chick.

[–]DonBullDor0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Teach one of your plates the sex you want, simple

[–]billybobjoecarl0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Going against the grain here. Go back, she wants it and so do you. She’s gotten the professional help she needed, people can change for the better mate. People deserve second chances especially in instances like this where you both want it badly.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Even if she didn't do that we should have still broken up. She was kind of a loser and wasnt going anywhere in life and by her own words wanted to stay poor and travel the world. Our objectives didn't like up.

[–]billybobjoecarl0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Okay then just be fwb

[–]skizzum970 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Keep fucking her, just always keep her on the ground level.

[–]CrackDaMarco0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Lmao, terrible advice, dude. He's so far below ground level even now.

[–]ShittySoftwar30 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I heard crazy girls are always the best in bed, to try keep you in.

[–]CrackDaMarco0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

We've all been there, your problem now though, is that you're obsessed and it's consuming you, basically ruining all your potential future dates with too many expectations set in your mind. You need time to heal. That starts by not looking at shit with/of/about her; no sex vids you did together, any kinky pics she or yourself took of her, conversations, etc. Just get better and focus elsewhere for now, man. Plenty more sluts in the sea.

[–]Diche_Bach0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Crazy is always the best fuck. And when one finds crazy and cherishes it for a time, and discovers it is well and truly crazy, it is a common reaction to wish it had not happened in our time. But it is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time we have.

There are other forces at work in this world, Deadlock, besides the will to coom. Perhaps you were meant to find the crazy and fuck it, and cherish it. And that is an encouraging thought.

[–]kankouillotte0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That's unfortunately the sad truth of psycho girls : they are the best in bed, you also get the best emotional highs with them, but you can't keep them for long or bad shit will happen.

[–]PuleaSpataru690 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What did she do in bed?

[–]plastic-watering-can0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Dodged a bullet.

[–]kidsavagebze0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Crazy girls always give the best lay. Had a crazy one myself back in the day and still haven't found someone who fucks as good as her...and feeling good about it since I don't think I need anymore crazy in my life...no matter how good the pussy.

[–]maverick97590 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

So she alpha widowed you. Oops.

[–]Pletskop0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It’s called oneitis. Please refer to the sidebar.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

KEEP SEARCHING, KEEP FUCKING SEARCHING MY DUDE.

DO NOT LET ONEITIS CONSUME YOU, IT WILL WRECK YOUR LIFE....LITERALLY.

KEEP SEARCHING, ALSO CREATE ABUNDANCE MENTALITY. IF YOU DO THAT, THAT DUMB CUNT WITH THE BREASTS WILL COME BACK TO YOU. THEN YOU CAN SPIN AND THEN DUMP HER AGAIN. EITHER WAY, THE CUNT WILL KEEP COMING BACK BECAUSE YOU, AN ALPHA, HAVE MANY, MANY OPTIONS TO CHOOSE FROM.

[–]earthredalert1230 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

a serious case of one-itis. Time will cure it.

[–]mrrooftops0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I would put money on her not being as good as you say. A 6 is an 8 to a 4.

[–]AlfredKinsey0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

First of all, props for handling the balcony situation to protect yourself from prison and another human being from certain death. Second, sex is not that big a deal. Sure, sex with psycho hot chicks can be REALLY good, but often comes with a lot of baggage and drama. If you haven't already, read up/listen to talks about cluster B personality disorders in women.

More than anything, mike_from_jersey is right and this WILL get better with time. This will only be true IF you maintain NO CONTACT and focus on your own life and reality as it is now. Right now, you have a weird form of oneitis, thinking that this dumb girl is somehow tHe bEsT fUCk EvER, but that belief is bullshit.

"I can't even talk to her without vivid nightmares and flashbacks."

DON'T FUCKING TALK TO HER EVER AGAIN. You deleted pics and videos, now delete her number, social media, etc. and put this girl all the way in the past.

You should also learn from this experience and be wary of your desire to engage in serious relationships with these types of chicks. It sucks, but usually it is just better to let yourself be another dude in a string a temporary flings for these types of women. You don't NEED to have your balls drained 10 times a day, it's just a very addictive experience that doesn't add much to your value as a man.

In the meantime: eat well, sleep right, exercise and lift, keep your house and finances in order, maintain your job or even work towards a better one/promotion/financial independence, build and foster HEALTHY relationships, and continue with the counseling. There are way better things to focus on.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thanks you are the first person ITT who praised me for my action to save her and myself. Appreciate it. The rest of your advice is also really good. Cheers.

[–]thrwy754790 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

It's likely that it's not only her appearance, and the sex that you miss. There may be stronger underlying motives:

She's getting better and wants me back badly but she's bad fucking news.

such as being wanted.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That is what my psych is saying. That I'm craving connection. But she doesnt understand that the contrast of great sex and OK sex is a big part of the pit I feel. To be fair I'm not exactly eager to tell her just how much I sexualized my ex.

[–]tenghu0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

lol everyone chases that "high". Gotta move on bro. That's just that. It may never happen again, but you know what make that thought go away? KEEP FUCKING MORE GIRLS!

[–]theredsperg0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

just fuck up girls the way you want to em to be. eventually they learn what you want, how they gonna know if you dont tell em

[–]theredsperg0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

there's also plenty more fish in the sea, this one was lucky to survive. respect that you're doing shit for that woman to be in a better place, takes a lot of courage.

with regards to fucking freaky bitches, you're better finding someone new,training em up to your standards.

in reality, that could have been what happened to your previous, girls are happy to change, if its for an alpha

[–]brinkleybuzz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Bro, no pussy is worth 20 to life. A batshit crazy chick like this isn't worth a long term relationship, so it had to end at some point anyway. Cherish the memories and move on.

[–]wowkwo0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

My ex- was a miss california and was the best sex i've had, but ya know what?

Life goes on and it has a way of bringing new and better things if you look for it and continue to improve.

I'll do better eventually and I know that because I believe it.

[–]paul_ernst0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

There are a lot of very sexual girls out there, many who just need to meet the right guy to get in touch with their own sexuality. Be that guy.

[–]ProFriendZoner0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

When you mine gold and you find a nugget ... do you stop there and live with that nugget the rest of your life?

Or do you think "If I found one, there has to be more"?

Keep looking. You will find more.

[–]zboo1h0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What I read here was "So, the SEX, her BODY, my DOPAMINE!"

Followed by "PTSD, extreme trauma, massive negative impact on my entire life!"

Punctuated with "The SEX! But also, NOT JUST THE SEX THO!"

You should start trying to figure out why you would trade sex chemicals for your quality of life.

And get rid of the fucking female psych.

[–]Luis_McLovin0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Move on.

[–]StarchRunner0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You encountered a siren. Congrats. She's probably fucking at least 5 guys on the side now. Pull yourself together man, stop letting your dick rule you and move on.

[–]SirNemesis0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

She's getting better and wants me back badly but she's bad fucking news.

Yolo dude, yolo.

[–]Rememberthecodex0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You know, i heard that heroin is a lot of fun too.

You understand now?

[–]PandaLitter-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

Which porn star?

For research purposes..

[–]L2diy3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why would you research a pornstar you cuck

[–]Drofspin-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lose the female psychologist for a start... see a male.

[–]warthundersfw-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

All pussy feels the same

[–]AlfredKinsey0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

false

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa-5 points-4 points  (23 children) | Copy

No matter how hot or good a fuck she is nothing, especially not a girl, is worth sacrificing your health and single status for. If she truly has gotten better and she is as hot as you claim and is begging to have you back then man up and get over yourself. There are actual soldiers out there who have seen their friends blown up in front of their very eyes compared to that your PTSD can’t possibly be that bad if all she did was have a suicide episode. If it truly is that bad see a therapist (preferably a male one if the female one doesn’t get you). If you decide to take her back group therapy every week and lay down the line as the man you are that if she tries anything like she did before you will not tolerate it. If you’re still on the fence, fap test. Rub one out then afterwards ask yourself ‘Would I be willing to commit to this girl or now that I’ve blown my load its time to move on to the next plate?’ Then you’ll have your answer while you have a clear mind.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 4 points5 points  (16 children) | Copy

Are you actually suggesting getting back with her? Yikes, I almost went to prison for murder dude. I also make far more money than her and she could divorce rape me. There were other problems than the suicide episode. She also physically assaulted me when I refused to let her kill herself.

You're right. My PTSD isn't that bad as a soldiers. It's still PTSD though.

She was also showing some possible signs of being a whore but our relationship didn't go as far for me to find out.

I have thought of re-opening communication to see if she's changed, but it seems too soon even now.

edit: sorry for that idea salad, obviously you can tell I'm scatterbrained on making any sort of decision here.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa-3 points-2 points  (15 children) | Copy

Only if you want to. You say you can’t be without her sex? Which is it? Is she a plate, a fwb lover, or a girlfriend? If you got assaulted or raped by a girl, start lifting some damn weights if a girl can overpower you!! Better decide bro because if she goes with another guy and you lose your opportunity you will regret it if you can’t find anyone to match her. If money is a concern don’t move in together and if you do happen to marry prenup.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 1 point2 points  (14 children) | Copy

she didnt overpower me whatsoever. Doesn't mean it wasn't assault.

[–]styxus90-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

Phew, good thing you didn't buy into this thread. Please read my comment. I think if someone cannot relate to this situation at all, it's easy to be very judgemental. That is totally out of place tho. Glad you saw that.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah read it thanks.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa-2 points-1 points  (11 children) | Copy

Then again, you make it clear if she does that shit, it’s over for good if you truly want her. Cops will take your side if you have to get rough as she is the one with mental health history if it comes to that. If it becomes a strain on you you have the right to break it off at any time for any reason.

[–]CrackDaMarco1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

You seem to be lost, bro. This girl is fucking nuts,

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Oh I 100% agree, but OP here still seems very much in love with her.

[–]-DeadLock[S] -1 points0 points  (8 children) | Copy

yeah fuck that. Thats just telling her that next time she has to go right for the jugular.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy

Then don’t see her again this really isn’t a difficult question it’s a yes or no. Is good sex and attraction worth the possible negative? If you seriously have to be paranoid about her killing you then she better damn well have the tits and ass of a photoshopped Kim Kardashian if you take her back. The paranoia alone would drive you insane.

[–]-DeadLock[S] -1 points0 points  (6 children) | Copy

It isn't truly a question of getting back with her or not. It's about finding that sexual connection again that rivaled what we had before. With someone else. And my frustration that it isn't nearly happening.

As another said. It was probably only that good because I was in love with her. The reason its not as good with other girls is because I was not in love with them. I realize now that what I'm craving is a connection and the great sex that comes with it.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

Honestly it doesn’t sound that way. It sounds like you were in love with her body more than her if anything so much that you cannot find that same sexual arousal with anyone else. If you truly were in love with her I don’t think she would’ve wanted to jump 20 floors to her death. Mental health issues are more prevalent these days more than ever but a good SO knows how to handle their SO if they have such issues. It also depends on length of relationship. Was she a LTR like 6 months plus? When did you both start having sex? If you’re just going around doing random hookups and fucking girls an hour after you meet them thats your problem as loveless sex is just average sex without any passion or chemistry involved. Occasionally it can be great, but if done often it’s just a way to pass the time and relieve stress and stroke your ego. If you’re looking for instant sexual chemistry that rarely happens, like 0.01% possibility.

[–]-DeadLock[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

you're blaming me for her attempted suicide and being a shitty partner? Yeesh you probably would have went for a piss and pass out while she did it and not notice til you rolled out of bed. The rest of your points perhaps stand though.

[–]styxus901 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

This comment is horrid. No empathy, and insensible to most of the matter at its core. You only focused on the porn fantasy, not the real life implications of such a fucked up situation. Someone wanted to frame someone else for her own murder. You think a half sentence is enough to deal with the "getting better" part? And that is just one thing, i don't have time to deconstruct the whole thing. Im getting serious psychopath vibes.

Plus, the language. "Man up" and do something you're supposed to do. Belitteling a man for his psyche and feelings, marginalizing them. That's exactly why we need the red pill in a world that is doing exactly that to men every day. I, personally, would prefer not to see such manipulative destructive bullshit on any RP sub.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

“Only focused on the porn fantasy”

  • 2/3 of the OP is about the girls appearance/sex with the girl. *

  • literally nothing elso to go on but ‘I fucked girl, girl crazy now, no good sex from new girls, fuck crazy girl again? help plz.’ *

I’m just brutally honest what can I say. Don’t like my opinion, don’t read it and move on. Easy 1 2 3. I’ve already been insulted by OP for giving my insight so I certainly don’t need your opinion. If I didn’t “man up” I’d still be sobbing in a corner eating myself into obesity wondering why girls won’t fuck me because I’m such a nice guy.

[–]styxus90-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

I am saying this with compassion and good will in my heart, not trying to attack you: try checking if you are overcompensating. If you actually dealt with your anger. Because I get the impression that might not be the case. I strongly recommend meditation for that. The book "the mind illuminated" is a good start, there is also a nice subreddit in the same name. Not to marginalize your successes so far! But replacing a big source of toxicity with a slightly lesser one is, after all, still not a good situation. There is a way to set your boundaries and get everything the world has kept from you before TRP, and still being a compassionate human being. You will need to be able to reflect a lot about yourself, and it won't be pretty. Never is. Wasn't for me. It will be a lot of work. But just because getting to know yourself for real isn't always pleasant, that doesn't mean it is not worth it. In fact, you may get the impression of really seeing clearly for the first time.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Please reread the thread and see who got angry first. Only annoyed that I wasted my precious free time trying to help someone overcome their shit as I never had that myself. I’ve seen shit you may be familiar with but I don’t have PTSD, whine and bitch about it anymore, or beg strangers for help. I’m being a god damn man and practically doing it all myself without anyone holding my hand for me as I do it. Sure do wish I had the opportunity to fuck a ridiculously super hot girl 6 times a day and have her begging to take me back oh the struggles and how horrible that must’ve been and surely contributed to the PTSD. The only anger I have is that I did not take the red pill sooner in life and I still occasionally beat myself up for being so naive and stupid for so long. I deal with my anger in a constructive way now. I lift, eat better, learn new hobbies, work on climbing the corporate ladder, and work on bettering myself.

Edit: Besides there are just soooooo many kind and compassionate people in this sub 🙄

[–]styxus900 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I wish you the best of luck.

[–]LegendarySuperSalsa0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you really want to help check back with me in a day or two when I’ve cleared my head being constantly belittled when I’m simply trying to help someone out tends to rile me up, thats what we’re all here for right?



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