714,030 posts

Forgiving her doubting me in the past?

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March 27, 2020
8 upvotes

Background

Been lifting for a few years. Dating GF for 5 years. Learned about TRP 6 years ago. Was dead set on not getting in a LTR and banging as many girls as possible after reading TRP. That changed when I met my current GF who checked off all my green flags and I realized she complemented my life well. Relationship has been great as a result. Focused on my self improvement throughout it (was a skinny guy in the beginning), got a very well paying job, sex has always been to my liking. She got the hint I would leave at the drop of a pin if boundaries were crossed, so she’s clung on to me

The Problem

Started having marriage talks about 18 months ago for the first time. It brought a smile to her face so wide from ear to ear. We planned out a timeline of when we would want to tell our parents, get engaged, move in, etc. Future looked rock solid. It kinda pained me to talk about committing myself to her for the rest of my life even though I wasn’t against it, because I didn’t feel comfortable giving her assurance of all of my commitment forever.

Time went on, and our plans were getting more real as we got closer to them.

Out of the blue one night she calls me and tells me she’s feeling “weird”. Long story short she was trying to convey that she wanted to hold off on our plans. She was having doubts. I was devastated. I remained calm, cool, and collected, but internally I was combusting, and some of that surely she read off of me. I gathered myself over the next few days, and started reading TRP again to familiarize myself with concepts I had lost a sharpness to throughout my relationship. She wanted to delay us moving in together by a year at the very least. When I asked about what her plans were for after that, she said she doesn’t know. This was all a bit of a 180. I kept lurking around TRP and kept adopting more and more.

A few months went by like this. I had hurt inside me, but I made sure it never escaped into my actions. She eventually came around about 2 months ago. She expressed that she regrets her having cold feet and doubts daily, and knows certainly that she wants to be with me. I acted fine as if I had forgotten about her indecisiveness and gave her a hug, cracked a joke, and continued business as usual.

Everything is back to normal on her end. In those few months, she was shit testing me more. We were rocky and she was cold. I’m no angel myself, I had to have some learning experiences to know I wanted to stay with her. So is there a justification on moving forward and looking at the better 99% of our 5 years?

I would like to be able to move forward, but the fact that I was doubted like that rubs a bone in my body the wrong way.

Any wisdom on weaknesses in me and my mentality you guys can see in me would be great. And any wisdom on moving past this would also be great.


Post Information
Title Forgiving her doubting me in the past?
Author SteroidSquarePants
Upvotes 8
Comments 41
Date 27 March 2020 09:34 AM UTC (8 months ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/358186
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/fpu21w/forgiving_her_doubting_me_in_the_past/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
long term relationshipshit testliftthe red pill
Comments

[–]tspitsatgp12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy

You just got a sneak peak into your future. That coldness you felt from her? She was giving her warmth to someone else.

[–]dilberryhoundog1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Branch snapped about 2 months ago.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

Please Sir, my hamster ate my question.

Dude.. if you don't know what you want yourself, how the fuck are we supposed to help you?

[–]MeansToABenz1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah wtf, my immediate reaction too. Make up your mind pussy

[–]mr4kino7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy

Was she sleeping with other guys when she was in the famous "I don't know" phase and "wanting some space"? To be honest gut feeling I wouldn't bother. She should be happy. I would definitely slow everything down. She did this once meaning she wouldn't have any issues of doing it again after marriage.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy

Sounds like she wanted one last swing on the cock carousel before settling down with her beta bucks, but was rallied so hard by Chad that it gave her second thoughts and she thought she might branch swing.

But to Brad, she's just pump and dump material.

[–]SepeanRed Beret4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy

You messed up, thinking that giving her commitment made her happy, so you gave more and more beta and forgot your alpha.

This doesn’t have shit to do with her doubting you. You lost frame, tried to play beta game, tanked your SMV.

Every woman in the world would have lost attraction to you - the only difference is that some women are ready to settle down with a beta and will hide their disgust.

If you’re too butthurt to get over it, that’s something you have to figure out for yourself, but you can’t blame this on anyone but you. She was just being a woman, and as much as they pretend to appreciate loyalty and being pedestalized, what they really want is alpha. You have to throw out your ideas about morals, fairness and reciprocity when dealing with women - they just don’t operate that way.

Remember this, and stay alpha.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy

You realize that she was guzzling Chad's cum, right? After that branch broke she is back to old-faithful.

Also, all this shit is about her, not you. Who's frame are you in?

[–]part_wolf3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Bold of you to assume he knows what frame is.

[–]RoccoPinkman1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Lol, that was quick

[–]skizzum97Can't Handle The Daddy2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why wouldn't you move in together BEFORE planning marriage???

My fiance couldn't wait to move in with me and, after I proposed, never once expressed doubt about our engagement.

The way she acted definitely spells room for your relationship. Her having doubts mean you failed at being her rock. You're way too far into her frame for that and it's why she is doubting commitment.

[–]ImNotSlash5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Learned about TRP 6 years ago.

You didn't learn shit else none of this would have occurred...

She was having doubts. I was devastated, I can’t lie.

internally I was combusting

I had lost a sharpness to throughout my relationship

the fact that I was doubted like that rubs a bone in my body the wrong way

Edit: In addition, seeking validation by posting pics.

Reestablish the focus where it belongs.

[–]weakandsensitive1 point2 points  (9 children) | Copy

Background

lists a bunch of shit that doesn't matter, but does point to extensive need for validation and obsessiveness.

I didn’t feel comfortable giving her assurance of all of my commitment forever.

Woman has doubts.

Can't do 1+1. Lol.

I remained calm, cool, and collected, but internally

Doesn't have the frame for 1+1. lol.

Good ol' TRP right there.

[–]SteveSan822 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Stop stealing my pics and editing them to make my family jewels smaller

[–]xX_bullitt_Xx3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You have an exquisite lack of abundance mentality, you are not even close to your own point of origin, and without her frame you wouldn't have one to be in. Your girl took time away from you to hop on the cock carousel. Remember, actions not words with women. What did her actions say?

[–]DoctorNini2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

As a woman, I can’t imagine telling my (now) husband I would have wanted to delay our future plans by a year. I knew he was the man I wanted to spend my life with, and was glad he wanted the same with me. Especially because he could have easily waited 10 more years to start a family (at 27) whereas I felt my biological clock ticking (at 26).

Having doubts for a short while might be understandable, I guess? But even that would have reflected on how she thinks of you. But to say she wanted to move everything so far down the road and keeping that up for months... Either she doesn’t appreciate your value, or her life goals are not in order. Either way, I would move on if I were you.

[–]RStonePT[M] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

As a woman you should have read the sidebar, especially the part of using your Vagina as an argument

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

As a woman, we can't believe anything you are saying. Especially the bit about you knowing that you would spend the rest of your life with your current sperm donor and provider.

[–]z2a1-90 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

lmao

[–]tom-anonymous0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

As a woman, you're just telling us how you feel in this very moment. Like the weather you'll feel differently tomorrow.

[–]tom-anonymous0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Your woman is like the weather. Remember that. You had clear skies. Then rain clouds came in. Now it's clear again. Eventually rain clouds will come back. Don't build your life around trusting her or thinking her current feelings about you are permanent.

You didn't say how old she was. Is she approaching 30?

[–]wkndatbernardus0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

"Forecast: dark and cloudy, with good chance of drive-by."

[–]tom-anonymous0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly.

[–]RoccoPinkman0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

And a light spattering of chads cum

[–]BootySlayer9110 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Hey at least you didn'tpull the trigger yet; believe me this shit's about 100X worse once you realize this shit and you're ALREADY married with kids. Lift get even bigger and go work on banging hotter women. She probably didn't cheat on you but they're sodeceptive it can be hard to know for sure. Then again if you're alpha why would you give two shits what she did? Have fun sucking hot delicious cocks tonight you gay faggot.

[–]z2a1-9-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Do not get married it is not worth it...



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