No tl;dr because it's not as simple as "do I text my ex?".

I'm 22 and need to discuss family issues with someone older. My brother (29) has fucked his life up, given up, and is a burden to my aging parents.

He and I were never close, too nice or much of a help for one another. None of me looking up to him, or him looking after me. He was your average Billy with few friends and no girlfriends. After finishing trade school he went to college but didn't put any effort in and dropped out. He did go to work for a short while, but was a whiny bitch and resigned. My unassertive bluepill parents were not fine with either, but didn't throw him out. I discovered trp in high school and had ambitious plans, so I even treated him with arrogant contempt like any edgy teenager.

Five years ago he met some shitty girlfriend with family issues, smoking, drinking habits. He started smoking, drinking and causing drama over her, and more. To be brief, after a year he wanted to propose, but she broke up with him. It soon turned out she was pregnant. Upon finding out he attempted suicide by drinking methanol. The hospital did save him, but shit's fucked him up. It turns out you don't necessarily go blind, but the nervous system is damaged. He spent some months in hospital bed, some months in psychiatry. Doctors said he would recover near 100% health, but he neglected rehab training and secretly avoided taking some meds (ones that he claimed gave him nausea etc.). I moved out to university and joined the military while he returned home. His ex gave birth to a pair of twins and it's proven that they're his. Now my family is paying her child support and going to court every six months over some crazy accusations of abuse etc. (she's nuts).

Four years forward to the present. He has made little recovery. He walks like a 90-yo and sometimes falls over for no reason. His muscles shake under any movement. He's skinny fat and balding. He's unemployed and doesn't want to work because he's butthurt he would have to pay her more in child support. He doesn't take the meds any longer. Me and our parents can obviously tell he's deeply depressed. But he clearly doesn't want any help, and neither of us wants to force anything in fear of perhaps triggering another suicide attempt. He just "lives" (exists?) with our parents who don't want to throw him out, miserable, unemployed, handicapped, playing games. He will probably live exactly like that for the next unspecified number of decades.

Our parents were never into "talks". As in I've never spoken with them about my relationships etc. They have issues with one another from a past near-divorce. I also have a lot of emotional problems and a shitload of work of my own. Our family just lives the daily life, pretending nothing's wrong and keeping each of our problems to oneself. I'm now trying to be less of a child and actually support whenever possible. You can imagine it's quite tense, uncomfortable a lot of the time as the problems we ignore are all still there. We're sometimes just pissed off deep down.

For me, hitting the bottom has always meant grief, but also bouncing back up to improve. He got caught face down in the mud and with no intention to resurface. I don't think he wants, or can be helped. It makes me angry too see him, hear him whine every so often like a bitch, not put any effort into making the situation better. It makes me mad because I can't bring anyone home. Parents can't take a weekend off for vacation and leave him alone. They are burdened by him financially. And they're not getting younger which scares me.

I'm torn between leaving it all as it is, or stepping in like I imagine a mature adult should. What does a young man like me do? Do I act more grown-up than the obviously unasertive parents and have "a talk" with him? With them? What would we even do? Throw my brother out on the street? Sustain him until my parents die? Is this is what adult life is about?

If I sound immature and messy, it's because I am, and need your advice all the more.