What are some unwritten rules you follow in your home for the sake of your SO?

emily481516 · 2020-04-11T08:50:25+00:00

I’m new to this subreddit and as a 20 y/o woman in a serious relationship I’m curious about RPW ideals, but I find it hard to agree with number 5 on your list. Why do you feel like you shouldn’t say no to your partner when it comes to intimacy? To me, that crosses the like between being a traditional wife and being a servant. Even in a more traditional relationship, shouldn’t you be able to talk freely to your partner and tell him that you don’t feel like having sex at that point, without the promise of making it up to him later? You exist to be his partner and his equal, I just hate the idea that some women out there are are forcing themselves to participate in acts that they don’t want to just to please their partner. It seems like you have uttermost respect for your partner which I admire, and I definitely understand wanting to do whatever you can to make him happy, but saying yes when you mean no is just unsettling to me. Do most red pill women agree with OP on this issue?

bluerabbitsmoon · 2020-04-11T14:48:21+00:00

I love hearing the comments on this! Thanks OP! Things that I do:

have a clean house before he gets home from work
have all the kids school work done before he gets home
wake up when he does every morning and make him coffee even though I don’t “have” to be up at 4:30. I believe in being on the same sleep schedule as a critical way to maintain connectedness.
have alone time together every evening after dinner
cook every meal (this was his expectation- it surprised me, but I enjoy it)
look nice, dress nice, do hair and makeup even if we aren’t doing anything
be sure to initiate sexual contact so that it’s not always him (a clear expectation he communicated at the beginning of our relationship)
not refusing sex. It’s not a big deal, because I’m never against having sex :D
making our bed every day and keeping the bedroom tidy always
hugging each other multiple times a day and saying I love you frequently

And in regard to some other comments on here, I’d say ANY of these things when applied to an unhealthy relationship will be disaster for a woman. I know, I’ve had a few bad relationships where I was offering myself as a feminine open woman in service to the high masculine principle I saw in my men- and it was bad. Very bad. With the right kind of man, a loving man, a man who also recognizes his responsibility to be a full expression of masculinity.... it’s awesome, and gives me confidence, strength, freedom.... we can conquer anything together.

ASTRA-LUX · 2020-04-11T12:55:34+00:00

First 3 rules are basic common sense.

Last rule is more about mutual compatibility when it comes to intimacy, I would NEVER say no to him, our pair bonding is unstoppable . We were born to be with each other.

AnnaAerials · 2020-04-11T16:23:19+00:00

I love your list! 1 and 2 particularly because my Fiance's work desk is right by the kitchen .

5 is absolutely a given. This is the man I love and plan on spending forever with so love on him by keeping his balls empty! Anyway here are my additions.

Always give him space when he gets home. (This doesn't include greeting him of course!) Give him at least 40 minutes to himself to unwind and destress with a drink or a snack. Our ritual is usually till I finish making dinner.
Don't second guess him when we're with company. He's a lot smarter than me anyway.
Stay fit! Valuable men always have options so to avoid insecurity as best as I could I keep my body tight.

ALaurenB · 2020-04-12T13:36:41+00:00

Good question!

For me it’s making sure that dinner is cooked and plated for him every night after work.

I make sure the kids are either in bed or ready for bed by the time he gets home, which is usually around 8/8:30PM.

Make sure the house stays clean and presentable for him and guests. Pre COVID-19 he worked 6 days a week so I make sure all cleaning is done before Sunday so we can spend uninterrupted time together.

He has been focused on weight loss for the last few months and as his biggest supporter, I make sure he has the time and space carved out in his day to do so. I also occasionally workout with him as additional motivation, as I usually workout alone.

I also know his diet is important so I keep calories and nutrition at the front of my mind when making his meals.

I run any purchases over $50 past him since I’m a stay at home mom. I respect that, that is his earned income not technically mine. He really never cares whatever I buy but it’s a courtesy.

I also never make plans without him knowing or for him. I don’t accept plans with friends/family until I run it by him and I don’t commit him to doing things until I ask.

Love some of the other lists on here as well!

AnnaAerials · 2020-04-11T11:41:48+00:00

I do the same with the entry way and with sex.

Another thing I do is leave the computer/Xbox available for my husband after work. If there’s anything I need to do on there or want to play a game I do it before he gets home. So he can get on an play without having to wait for me.

We’ve been falling into a routine that Saturdays I sleep in and he takes care of the kids. And we do the opposite on Sunday.

Zakdoekjeleggen · 2020-04-12T16:06:42+00:00

My husband wants very specific spoons for various dishes and I do my utmost to comply.

Unlike OP, I say no to sex as much as I can. Much more fun IMHO. These are risky games for those with pokerfaces or in new relationships tho, proceed with caution.

dogbeaches · 2020-04-12T20:06:08+00:00

Thanks for your list!

burn-all-bridges · 2020-04-11T15:31:23+00:00

1 2 and 3 are so important to me. I have a pretty bad sensitivity to sound and the incinsideration of people making it around me when they could easily not.

pearlsandstilettos · 2020-04-11T14:16:02+00:00

When he wishes to speak to me about something, I don‘t interject until he tells me to speak. I don’t disturb the flow of his speech or thinking until he wishes me to do so. He finds interruption highly disrespectful.

Apart from his laundry, I don’t touch or move anything in the home that belongs to him. This is a long standing instruction.

When he is home, I don’t direct or discipline the children. Those are his decisions to make.

I don’t go to bed until he tells me it is bedtime, and I don’t stay up after that.

I don’t take the children to visit my parents or his parents when he is at home. I also don’t make phone calls beyond essential logistical ones. He expects my full attention and availability when he is at home.

He does not permit any chores except cooking to be done when he is at home.

I never agree to any social or family commitment without first gaining his permission for times I expect him to be at home. If I have made a commitment and he unexpectedly will be at home that time, I cancel it.

Title	What are some unwritten rules you follow in your home for the sake of your SO?
Author	AnnaAerials
Upvotes	92
Comments	89
Date	April 11, 2020 6:30 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/fyy4ni/what_are_some_unwritten_rules_you_follow_in_your/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/what-are-some-unwritten-rules-you-follow-in-your.361633 https://theredarchive.com/post/361633