Girl is in a relationship with a wealthy alpha that maintains impeccable frame and doesn’t put up with her shit tests. She feels neglected and hurt (hamstering ensues)

gamefuck · 2015-10-26T09:59:21+00:00

HOLY SHIT THIS IS THE BEST PART

When my cat needed an expensive life or death stomach surgery a few months ago, Marc called my mother and said he would take care of all the medical bills and treatments under the condition that it wouldn’t be brought up because he didn’t like the attention of being the “rich benefactor”. The other thing that almost made me throw up was when I learned that he paid for the funeral of my father who died around a 14 months ago. I always thought my mother paid for everything as she told me she had to liquidate some assets and saving accounts of hers in order to pay for the cat’s surgery and my father’s burial. It turns out that my mother has been struggling with her money more than she liked to admit and it was Marc who helped her discreetly and took care of these things without telling me or anyone else.

This supposed cold hearted son of a bitch is actually the NICEST GUY on the planet as well as being an unbreakable alpha. I feel bad for any guy that gets with this girl in the future. Talk about alpha-widowed, she will never, ever meet a man this good again.

ironblacksmith · 2015-10-26T04:19:19+00:00

It reads like this girl thought she had found herself a nice Beta Bux. Half of the first post is her talking about how impressive his money is, BUT SHE'S NOT A GOLD DIGGER GUYS.

The problem seems to stem from him not wanting to play the role for her, ergo the post "how dare my BB not want to behave!"

fadetoblack1004 · 2015-10-26T05:55:45+00:00

I fucking love it when the internet convinces some weak-minded woman to seriously fuck up their relationship.

david_kimba · 2015-10-26T07:13:38+00:00

I told her everything about his lone wolf attitude and how he seems to never put me first, the money/wealth gap and the stupid tab splitting in restaurants.

Now my mother got even more upset and slapped me on the back of my head (note: not intended as an assault but more like “omg kid why are you so stupid”). She then proceeded to tell me a secret he and Marc have been sharing for a year now.

When my cat needed an expensive life or death stomach surgery a few months ago, Marc called my mother and said he would take care of all the medical bills and treatments under the condition that it wouldn’t be brought up because he didn’t like the attention of being the “rich benefactor”.

The other thing that almost made me throw up was when I learned that he paid for the funeral of my father who died around a 14 months ago. I always thought my mother paid for everything as she told me she had to liquidate some assets and saving accounts of hers in order to pay for the cat’s surgery and my father’s burial.

It turns out that my mother has been struggling with her money more than she liked to admit and it was Marc who helped her discreetly and took care of these things without telling me or anyone else

This woman... She was so fucking lucky to be with that guy, but it is never enough.

I thought my father was exagerating when he meant, you give women a cm they take the whole mile and you never give women all your love nor all your money, no matter how much you have of any, it will never be enough for them.

Holy shit. The thread you linked had a lot of rp truths telling her how fair he was and how lucky she was, yet he had to cherry pick the stupid, ilogical inconsistent posts that empowered her point of view.

Throw everything away in the blink of an eye because... EMOTIONS!

Overkillengine · 2015-10-26T06:34:56+00:00

So if you're an alpha, women become insecure and start longing for beta bucks, and if you're a beta, women become disgusted and unhaaappppyyy?

I'm starting to understand why many people on this sub prefer plates to LTRs.

TheRedPilsner · 2015-10-26T05:12:42+00:00

This reminds me of that thread from TwoX a while back where a woman was dating a guy who appeared to be poor. He lived in a modest house, he drove an inexpensive car, worked as a web designer, etc. She decided to break up with him because she felt he had no ambition. A little while later she ran into a couple of his buddies, and learned that her ex-boyfriend was loaded all along due to inheriting considerable real-estate assets. The woman tried to contact her ex, but he refused to take her calls. So she posted her story to TwoX seeking advice, the whole time insisting "I'm not a gold digger, but why wouldn't he spend money on meeeeeeee?"

Just a word of warning, guys: if you make a lot of money and LTR a girl, sooner or later she's going to feel entitled to a portion of it. Never tell her exactly how much you make (and she will try to find out sooner or later), and don't flaunt your wealth in an attempt to impress women unless you're trying to become a beta bux.

setzer_ · 2015-10-26T05:52:28+00:00

Guy sounds like an absolute G.

rpscrote · 2015-10-26T15:54:00+00:00

Reading through the comments I'm seeing many TRPers getting a little indignant at the fact that women tie romance and finance together. You shouldn't be angry or frustrated at such a thing - AWALT. Don't get mad at the rain. Be happy it greens up the grass.

See Briffault's Law --->

Even though dude was top shelf alpha, the perceived benefit never materialized, so the association ended.

The woman basically delivered the message "Hey... Um... I need you to break me off a little something-something commiserate with your net worth in order for me to feel valued in this relationship."

Dude was basically like "Yeah that's never going to happen so we need to end it."

In her mind the hamster was spinning up "His fucking sister is going to Japan? WTF? I'm the one sucking the dick and giving up the pussy. Where's my fucking trip to Japan?"

Immediately followed by the "I'm not a gold-digger, but..." disclaimer.

Allow me to translate "I'm not a gold-digger" from hamster-ese:

I still expect you to spend the cash, because if you don't spend it then I'm not fully convinced you really care about me. But don't worry, I'm a good girl and it will work out for you.

Well at least until the benefit ceases and/or a Bigger, Better Branch swings along, leading her to change her mind - which we all know is a woman's prerogative.

I don't think its too outlandish for a woman to judge a man's interest by his material investment into a relationship. AWALT.

If your goal is to remain single and you know you have zero designs on marriage and family, then the policies deployed by "Mark" in this story are a proper blueprint for success. Any woman you get into an LTR with might accept low material investment on the front end, but they all expect higher material payout on the backend - AWALT. Even though they might agree to an initial framework that provides limited material benefit, odds are the acceptance of that dynamic will not last all that long. So by sticking to the initial agreement, the issue of "where the relationship is going" eventually takes care of itself (not going anywhere) and you remain a bachelor as is your desire, moving on to the next chapter in your tome of male-female relationships.

So, it's an accurate assessment on the woman's part that if you are setting hard financial/material boundaries - and sticking to them - then advancement of the relationship into cohabitation/engagement/marriage territory is highly unlikely. Briffault's law kicks in, and they depart to seek out a more serious, mature relationship.

Adversely, if a man was seeking a more serious relationship, and could easily afford such things, then he would be more apt to pick up the check at dinner and/or take his lady on vacation with him. For the man planning on lifelong commitment, (healthy) providing is part of the deal. Of course it goes without saying that any man venturing into this territory would be wise to make sure he vetted his lady thoroughly beforehand, be extremely affirmed that marriage, children and family were his goal, and that this decision was a wise one to make in the first place.

Anyone who has read my posts and comments before probably knows already that I am not hard line anti-marriage, as I believe this is the best environment for a child to be in - raising them with mom and dad together married and committed to one another. For men that want to experience fatherhood and family, its the obvious choice. I do stress that men don't just haphazardly wander into marriage. When they consider it - they do so with a comprehensive understanding of the sacrifices, responsibilities and (most of all) the risks involved. Its the one decision in your life that can tear you asunder if you fuck up and make wrongly. But I digress...

Getting back to OP's related story, this woman isn't behaving abnormally by increasing her expectations. Think about it, if you were a woman and some very handsome, very smart and very successful man entered your life, you'd probably want to lock him down - especially if the wall was looming. You'd be on your best behavior, you'd be submissive, you'd give up the good-good sexually, and you'd show him your domestic talents in hopes that he would recognize that he's got something that's capable of making him happy for a very long time.

When they figure out there's no eventual payoff, they become disenchanted and start radar-seeking the next branch (or just break it off so they can search unencumbered) thinking that they just invested all this time and effort for nothing. For a woman, this is pretty logical strategy. Its good to know and understand so you can better manage your own decisions, but serves no purpose hating them for it, IMO.

Part of self-actualization is knowing what you want out of life, and then acting rationally in accordance with what your goals are. The being Red Pilled part is not allowing oneself to be fooled by false narratives which lead to irrational decisions, self-defeating behavior and unwanted consequences.

stukaf · 2015-10-26T07:44:58+00:00

From the update post:

He answered that he’s not forcing me to stay with him and if I thought that the relationship has no future he won’t hold me back for my own good. I got emotional and nearly cried, telling him I need a break and he acts so immature sometimes and doesn’t consider my feelings at all.

This the scalpel that cuts to the heart of the modern hamster. I had to read this paragraph a number of times to make any sense of it. It is a literal contradiction, the death rattle of a failed confrontation where emotion meets frame. This is the moment she realizes that she fucked up - a knee jerk response to the welling of dread she undoubtedly felt as it become clear she would never be able to get what she wanted from him.

After his statement:

He answered that he’s not forcing me to stay with him and if I thought that the relationship has no future he won’t hold me back for my own good.

The hamster kicks into its highest gear. Time and space warp around the frenzied creature, the past is rewritten, responsibility abandoned and emotions projected. He has drawn the line, and where the field has been opened to a moment of true insight, the hamster speaks:

I got emotional and nearly cried

An attempt to generate pity through victimization. The hamster sets the stage.

Then:

I need a break

The ultimatum is delivered. The hamster escalates the situation by rote.

The hamster spins even faster:

he acts so immature sometimes

The hamster has disconnected its host from her memories. Every statement in her post has described Marc to be a reliable, independent, and above all mature human being. The hamster, having no experiences from which to draw a true argument, generates a justification. It now seeks to preempt its own culpability for the results of its own ultimatum.

The hamster nears light speed:

[he] doesn’t consider my feelings at all.

A masterwork of emotional projection. The hamster has no ability to view a relationship outside its emotional frame. His argument is fully considerate of her feelings but is based on logic and assumes that, like his own, her fulfillment is derived from her own success as a human being. Telling her he would never stand in the way of her path to fulfillment is the most considerate thing a sigma personality could ever say to another person. The reality is that she is unable to see their relationship from his perspective; the very definition of inconsiderate. Unwilling to cede its own wrongdoing, the hamster projects the woman's own formless emotions onto Marc.

But in doing so, the hamster has inadvertently revealed its host's true nature. In projection we see truth. It is her who has been inconsiderate. She has not once shown any willingness to understand his way of thinking. Her ignorance of what makes her now ex-boyfriend the man he is shows us which of them is inconsiderate.

I almost feel bad for her.

Almost

*edited for structure and flow

EvrythingISayIsRight · 2015-10-26T04:33:04+00:00

Damn I think some of the advice in relationships is actually decent.

Whad'ya know, a broken clock is right twice a day.

You know you dun goofed when your Mum says you goofed.

penworth · 2015-10-26T06:15:26+00:00

I read the update: shit's disgusting. The guy did this bitch a solid and helped out her mom by paying for her cat's surgery and even paying for the dad's funeral expenses, "but why doesn't he do any thing for meeeeeeee" The solipsism is transparent.

I'M NOT A GOLD DIGGER GUIIIIIIISE

Borsao66 · 2015-10-26T04:18:51+00:00

She needs to be quarantined asap. Craytonium Alpha Widow alert!

VasiliyZaitzev · 2015-10-26T05:09:27+00:00

No woman is entitled to a relationship on her terms. She is free to leave at any time. In this case, he laid out the terms of their relationship, and she can either fuck or walk.

She hamsters away....but she stays.

Squeezymypenisy · 2015-10-26T05:57:15+00:00

Look at how much the mom likes him and just spills the beans on him being the benefactor behind the nice deeds. It really all boils down to his money. She hates that she has no way to force him to spend it on her and now because of her immaturity she lost him. She is a definite alpha widow after this. She will find a beta, have kids, maybe a divorce, but no amount of other men will keep her from thinking of "what could have been." That's why women have depression, they always have regret from living in a fantasy. I really hope for an update 3, but I doubt it since he is done with her. Guy sounds like a really smart man. Especially in a country like the UK where marriage is so dangerous.

battyryder · 2015-10-26T05:10:44+00:00

ahahahaha, lols, so funny, these bitches are becoming more and more entitled. they always fucking want from you but rarely reciprocate. i can't remember the last time a female other than my gran offered me dinner or even bought me a gift, never mind a trip abroad.

TheRedPilsner · 2015-10-26T05:32:07+00:00

Yes, we all know women need a large circle of „friends“ to gossip and for external validation. Suddenly it's „weird“ when someone likes to have quality over quantity when it comes to relationships.

I've always loved the saying "When it comes to friends, it's better to have four quarters than a hundred pennies."

grewapair · 2015-10-26T16:08:23+00:00

I need a break = I need you to stick around while I see if I can do better.

MonkeyDFreecs · 2015-10-26T05:02:47+00:00

I find Marc very easy to relate to with the exception of the wealthy part (but I hope to be able to relate to him in that soon).

Why do some women seem to get stupid when they get hold of a rich man especially when they make it clear on what the relationship should be. Marc is the millionaire here, you should be doing everything you can to please him and make him want you as a significant part of his life. He can dump you in an instant and get some new pussy within minutes of dumping you. I guess when they let them in they think they're very important to them thus she can make him beta bux.

She's also probably upset she doesn't get to live the celebrity life since he doesn't care for gossip, pop culture and having an entourage.

Vaecor · 2015-10-26T10:09:03+00:00

[–]PlayerVII 8 points 13 hours ago* It's simple. He doesn't need you. If you leave him hell find someone else. You can play by his rules or you can leave his is what we call a man and this is the reality more and more of you women will deal with because men are taking back their balls. He won't change you won't convince him to change you will push him away and he'll just dump you and find another women if you decide you have problems with how your relationship He won't get married ever because it will risk his wealth if divorce happens. Marriage gives zero benefits too males. He doesn't have to make decisions with you in mind because his choices is all that matter. Why do you feel entitled to have dinner bought for you? Or for him to give you some trip to japan that he can afford but you can't. You are entitled to nothing. This is what you women want right? Equal treatment? Huzza Your choice is simple if you care about him be faithful be with him if you don't break up and move on. permalink

This is a great response, it actually got upvotes.

MeltzerDriver · 2015-10-26T07:15:09+00:00

This guy is a Sigma.

Studying the behavior of Sigmas can end up being fruitless. To be a Sigma you need some sort of outlier factor. You need to be in some way uniquely important outside of social contexts, because the effect only really works if she thinks she can't possibly replace you. Achieving this is much harder than achieving "alpha" status, which is entirely social and essentially independent of your professional success.

If you're a loner type who lives in a typical studio apartment working as a cubicle drone, then women have another word for guys like you: loser. If you're a loner type who does something exceptional that garners respect and attention regardless of your social success, and you hold frame/act alpha when needed, then you are a Sigma. Famous Sigma examples are James Bond or Steve Jobs.

The Sigmas I encounter most often are surgeons. I was baffled at how girls in my med school class would fawn over surgical residents that were objectively not very "alpha" at all. They're often skinny because their job leaves no time for working out. They don't have time for a thriving social life, but in social situations they can take charge if needed (because that's what they do in the remainder of their life in the OR). Most importantly, they do something reserved for a very select group of individuals. They essentially emit the ability to be alpha, but the inclination to pursue something more worthy.

Be careful trying to emulate a Sigma. You need to be busy, successful, and mysterious enough to break out of the realm of "loser" territory. It's not enough for her to "not understand" you. She has to want to understand you. She has to think that she hasn't met anyone like you before.

Also, while Sigmas may draw women, if women are your end goal then being "alpha" is a far more worthwhile endeavor. You will draw women more quickly and easily. You will derive more satisfaction from your social life (rather than your professional life). Finally, you will be able to give more to her emotionally without breaking frame. The last point is the most important. A Sigma only avoids being BetaBux through distance and mystery. Once a women is let inside of his world, the fantasy surrounding it crashes down. This is a big part of why I see so many surgeons getting divorced. They try to be both Sigma and married. They either let their wives in on all their feelings and lose the mystery (and her respect), or they neglect the relationship despite demanding loyalty from their spouse, which leads to resentment.

TheRedPilsner · 2015-10-26T04:39:57+00:00

He sounds more like a sigma.. Aren't they more the loner type?

monsieurhire2 · 2015-10-26T06:21:45+00:00

Eh, I'm going to advocate for the Devil on this one. If you've been dating a woman exclusively for two years, as Mark has, because according to the OP, he believes in monogamy, and you are wealthy, as Mark is, you have to consider the effect on the woman's self-esteem of you not paying for anything, when traditionally, men pick up the tab on things like dinners for their girlfriends.

Now, it's one thing if you barely know the girl and you're trying to qualify her as having genuine interest or being in it for a free meal, but it's another if you've been exclusively dating for two years and you never treat her AND exclude her on a lot of activities, you may just be stingy.

Now, nobody is entitled to anything, but Marc did tell this woman that he wanted to be exclusive with her, and that he felt a special connection with her, so they are boyfriend and girlfriend, and traditionally, people treat each other.

Also, she has a point regarding wealth disparity. If you date someone with more money than you, and they have champagne tastes, good luck keeping up with them and not going broke.

"Oh honey, we're going to the fancy four star restaurant tonight! All the other beta bux men will be paying for their gold-digging whore girlfriends, but YOU will be expected to fork over $500, which is akin to half a month's rent for you, but only a pittance for me! And don't forget to give me gas money for the stretch hummer, and naturally you'll have to tip my valet and butler, since they don't work for free, and it's only fair because the butler did open the door for you!"

There are a lot of people I avoid hanging out with because they like to spend exorbitant amounts of money on things I don't value. Conversely, there have been relationships that extinguished for want of funds.

If you're a wealthy guy, you're going to have to face up to the fact that wealth will ALWAYS be a factor in why women choose to be with you. That's part of the reason you built or preserved the wealth in the first place: to make yourself more marketable in the sexual marketplace. In any case, it is one of the main reasons for generating wealth: as a means of securing the present and creating the future, which also means future generations, aka children.

You can try and hide or downplay your wealth, but that makes you less attractive and competitive, especially if you are older. Rail against it all you want, but it's true. You can downplay it initially for qualification purposes, but as soon as you let a woman into your life, she's going to see that you have nicer things than the average man. That being said, you don't have to let yourself get exploited. If you're strong enough to build wealth, you're also strong enough to put your foot down and say no to unnecessary extravagance.

But I digress. Back to my original point. If you are the wealthier party in a relationship and you're not willing to make token purchases to bolster your partner's esteem, maybe you are just cheap and insensitive. Sure, it was nice that the guy paid for the cat surgery and the funeral, but the woman didn't learn about it until it was too late because he kept it hidden, so she had gradually come to believe that the guy just looked at her as a cheap whore.

ChadThundercockII · 2015-10-26T21:10:24+00:00

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CastratedBetaOrbiter · 2015-10-26T12:02:38+00:00

If he wasn't rich, the kind of guy she described would be deemed "creep loner" by society.

Magnum256 · 2015-10-26T15:16:48+00:00

Haha she made an "Update #2" https://archive.is/odNHc

The boyfriend dumped her ass and now she's calling him toxic and getting back together with her highschool sweetheart "Jeff" lol.

I’m just realizing how toxic my relationship with Marc was and how I neglected my old friends because of my emotional struggle; and before anybody says it: No, Jeff is not Marc’s replacement, we are just catching up as we both have been super busy the past year; add to the fact that he thought that Marc’s attitude didn’t fit me and my ideals of a relationship from the start, I think we have a lot to talk about and work out our past issues with each other. I have lost my boyfriend but I wont lose Jeff and Sabrina as a result of all this drama. Wish me strength reddit, I’ll definitely need it.

let_terror_reign · 2015-10-26T16:34:27+00:00

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ReasonFreak · 2015-10-26T17:39:04+00:00

Wealthy, aloof, disappears for a month at a time, it sounds like she was dating Batman.

Mattpilf · 2015-10-26T06:28:04+00:00

Nothing wrong with Marc as a person, but it's clear she'd never be family to him. He didn't want companionship for life. She'll never be on that same level. It's not just that he doesn't want a gold digger, he doesn't want to deal a marriage. He doesn't want an equal, he doesn't want someone who's gonna take a bullet for him. He really just wants FWB, maybe some minor intamacy. Honestly there's a high chance he'd end a relationship in 10-20 years because of boredum or lose of looks.

She's right that he doesn't care enough about her, in the sense that she wants something he'll never give. She wants a partner who treats her as equal and as one unit, she wants marriage level commitment, but that's not what he wants, and he's not budging.

The problem is less of "she's a gold digger." and more "she's dense and doesn't understand ' he does NOT want to have any children EVER, does NOT want to get married EVER and he plans to stay independent with separate flats/bank accounts etc.' means". He doesn't want a wife, he doesn't want a life partner, he doesn't want a 'better half' and he made that clear. She's just too self centered to realize they want two different things, and he's made that abundantly fucking clear.

Rougepellet · 2015-10-26T07:16:09+00:00

These women are fucking idiots. When they come across a great catch like this guy, they let their hamster, hypergamy, etc fuck it up for them. She doesn't realize what a catch she had, especially with her time running out. She isn't worthy of him, hope the wall hits hard and fast. It will be a good spectacle.

exit_sandman · 2015-10-26T09:46:57+00:00

Guys, that's another troll post.

The whole story sounds rather unlikely in itself, and then - after 2 years of having been together - within 7 freaking days and a day after breaking up, she suddenly finds out that her stingy boyfriend has been the mysterious benefactor who kept her family afloat. Her mother never told her that before, but suddenly brought this up after they separated? Seriously?

To me, it sounds more like a semi-elaborate drama or a cautionary tale with the morals "see girls, that's what you get from expecting too much from a man, even though he was a super-great guy all along! He'll leave and your family will fall into crushing poverty; because you selfishly wanted him to spend money on you, yet took his far greater contributions for granted, didn't even register them. Ha, that'll show ya!"

rockumsockumrobots · 2015-10-26T08:11:03+00:00

It's sad that we have today's legal and gender relations climate. If we lived in an "oppressive patriarchy" this man would be a Lord (or some comparable class), sire 2 or 3 healthy kids, teach the boys to be men and hire a midwife for a girl to learn to be a proper lady.

Instead, this man's greatness will die with him, the woman will become a cat lady, or flush her genetics down the toilet with the next idiot to come along and have the state raise the kids.

Oh well, Enjoy the Decline as they say. One day a bright mind in the horde of genetic waste that wanders the future earth will have a brief flash of admiration for the greatness of those that have been lost.

clawjelly · 2015-10-26T09:41:42+00:00

I love how smart the guy demask her with that little question:

"Do you feel jelous i paid that vacation for my sister?"

Any mature person without gold-digger-syndrom would have said "No, i'm happy for her!" But this is a phrase no greedy person will EVER get over the lips. Of course she was "disappointed"... Gold-digger-checkmate!

gamefuck · 2015-10-26T09:50:10+00:00

It's funny when women don't realise they're a plate.

pdtrading · 2015-10-26T13:58:57+00:00

God this was an incredible post! Thank you for taking the time and sharing both articles and the synopsis to it. I mean damn, talk about fucking ALPHA WIDOWED! This guy is such a fucking TRP posterboy that it is incredible. Im not only inspired by his actions and thought process, it is so much more endearing to hear it from the womans perspective. To understand that all things don't last, and that you should always be true to you and maintain your frame. To be so detached is incredible.

anti_erection_man · 2015-10-26T14:51:26+00:00

Damn, and I'm here thinking that I'm the only sociopathic fucking asshole that considers the vast majority of "friends' just acquaintances that are really not worth anything.

Tom_The_Human · 2015-10-26T15:12:32+00:00

This is pretty much the female version of the friendzone.

B0u1dA · 2015-10-26T16:38:25+00:00

Alpha widow coming through

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T10:21:35+00:00

[permanently deleted]

2015-10-26T17:39:23+00:00

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prodigy2throw · 2015-10-26T21:06:09+00:00

The birth of an alpha widow

sendmepicsofyourbutt · 2015-10-26T22:10:45+00:00

I used to watch Maury, now I just come here.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T11:43:51+00:00

This is my favorite part:

He also told me that he’s despising cheaters (be it men or women;) in a relationship and if I would ever have an affair he would walk away within a minute and not bat an eye no matter how long we were together or how great our relationship was. I was a bit baffled with all the honesty but at the same time thought it was maybe a bit of insecurity talking so I didn’t think much of it.

So, a guy who dumps is cheating gf does so because he's insecure. It's amazing how deep the hamster is ingrained in today's society.

strps · 2015-10-26T12:33:22+00:00

Surprising the guy never had to endure one of her pregnancy "scares".

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T14:07:19+00:00

sad individual with deep psychological issues

Oh, yeah. Look at him being so sad with his hard-earned wealth that he rightfully spends on himself. A man who doesn't give a fuck about other people's opinions and only does what he wants without anything holding him back. Yeah, so sad... for them that they can't live like that.

Magnum256 · 2015-10-26T14:43:21+00:00

if you go against the grain of „traditional expectations“ you will be labelled as psychotic, crazy, immature and dismissed as sad individual with deep psychological issues.

It's extremely easy to get this kind of label by the majority of society if you do anything that doesn't conform to social norms. If you speak out against the idiocy of marriage, or have unorthodox opinions regarding relationships, health, socialization, finance (believe in acquiring at any cost, or completely disregarding it) or any other outside-the-box mentality, you can and often will get labeled as strange or disturbed. The rest of your composure (confidence, physical attractiveness) will determine if that label means complete ostracization, or just considered to be that 'kind of cool but strange guy'.

This is of course due to how society is structured. Everything the average person does is reinforced by government and media to be considered normal, because it's in the benefit of a consumerist society to have people that are predictable and habitual doing things predictably and repeatedly. We're all meant to go to college, get a job, pay our taxes, and spend whatever's left on acquiring a house, car, nice clothes, family, and surrounding ourselves with people doing the exact same thing without question or qualm, and if you step outside that agenda you're labeled as abnormal and it can become a constant internal struggle to live with when everyone around you is making it clear that you aren't like them and that not being like them is somehow inherently wrong.

let_terror_reign · 2015-10-26T16:33:23+00:00

This guys is a god. I read the updates, he's something I aspire to - like a Hank Rearden kind of guy. Does his own thing, gives no fucks, plays no games, but when push comes to shove he paid for her dad's funeral and the cat's operation.
I feel sorry for her. He's a champ, he'll be fine. She missed out on something great, poor kid.

After reading OP's update, I think you got it exactly right. He was willing to do a kind and generous thing but wanted to keep it anonymous so it doesn't influence their relationship or have the mom feel indebted to him. (So basically the exact opposite of what others were speculating about him wanting to influence the mom and how he planned it all out as some kind of controlling strategy.) In a way, it seems like Marc is the guy who sees this situation the most clearly and really, we can judge him all we want for avoiding attachment or doing things the way he wants, but he's living life by his rules and he's not hurting anyone by doing so. He responsibly broke it off with OP as soon as he knew it was going to hurt her because of fundamental differences in what she wanted vs what he wanted. He's not trying to be anything other than what he was, and he told her what he was and what he expected. I think people are just thrown because we come into these threads and relationships with so many ideas and expectations of what "normal" people want already, and we make so many value judgments about what is or isn't ok in terms of attachment, love, emotions, family, marriage, kids, everything. It's like the same value shock when someone who really wants kids goes into childfree or something.

Best answer in the thread. People are getting smarter, or we're infiltrating everywhere. This is sensible, fair and empathetic but not placating in the least to anyone's sensibilities.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T16:51:43+00:00

This comment sums it up

I think Marc's decision to keep his generosity towards your family hidden from you was a mistake that kept him from being able to properly communicate in your love language, and since he's reading this right now I hope he learns not to do so in the future.

Did you read that "communicate in your love language." I.e. gifts and pretty things = love.

ChadThundercockII · 2015-10-26T21:15:45+00:00

They locked the post. Faggot mods.

strategos_autokrator · 2015-10-26T13:47:31+00:00

She just posted another update.

https://archive.is/odNHc

It is amazing how in it she both expresses resentment for him ending it,

told me in two sentences that this relationship has no future and he isn’t interested in pursuing things any further; be it platonic friendship or anything else: so he basically told me to get lost. What a nice first reply that was….

but also she then at the ends somehow hamsters it out that she ended it with him.

Ended it with Marc

Oh, and she mentions a beta orbiter she is turning too already.

No, Jeff is not Marc’s replacement, we are just catching up as we both have been super busy the past year; add to the fact that he thought that Marc’s attitude didn’t fit me and my ideals of a relationship from the start, I think we have a lot to talk about and work out our past issues with each other.

Update: Some of the comments of users are fucking incredibly open about she being entitled to his money:

I think Marc's decision to keep his generosity towards your family hidden from you was a mistake that kept him from being able to properly communicate in your love language,

So is this user saying that her love language is Money??

Him being the secret benefactor behind your back while playing the whole lone wolf thing felt super pedantic.

So he shouldn't have made her look bad for being generous and not needing recognition for it?

At least this user warns her about becoming an Alpha Widow:

Although, in the future, try not to think about Marc and compare your future bfs/husbands to him or how rich he was or the things he could afford etc.

Mjazz3 · 2015-10-26T10:36:37+00:00

Not all the commentators take the OP's side. Some guy with the ID: JeanValjean197o really gives it to her, and her enablers.

GiskardReventelov · 2015-10-26T12:27:15+00:00

This post was inspiring in striving to become like this guy one day.

ashrobb · 2015-10-26T13:18:17+00:00

He sounds like a pretty cool dude. I totally would want to meet him and hang out some time.

I'm exactly like him in regards to my views on friendship. I really don't have or want many friends. I have quite a few acquaintances and I can be very social, but otherwise I do my own things and DGAF about society or gossip, or celebrity garbage.

You keep saying you aren't a gold digger, but clearly you equate a man spending money on you with your self-worth. Forty years ago this would have been common and even acceptable, however, today in our culture of "equality" women have no right to expect men to buy them a GD thing. Now you should expect to pay your way.

Of course, you want him to buy you stuff (but you aren't a gold digger). That says that deep down you feel like he's less than you are. That he should be paying you for the privilege of being in your life. And that my dear makes you a gold digger. The fact that you aren't actually getting paid just means you are an unsuccessful gold digger.

I give this guy mad props for being both upfront with you and keeping his word. It's rare to find people who don't flip flop on issues or change their view whenever the wind blows the wrong way.

He's steady, honest, treats you well, is financially stable, obviously attractive to you, and according to you is perfect in every way that is important, but since he won't buy you stuff you feel neglected and betrayed.

In sum, you have no reason to be unhappy.

You are getting exactly what you were promised and agreed to. You have no right to expect to be bought with gifts and vacations (didn't the feminists claim men owned women like property?). By this very Reddit post you are proving that you can't keep your word and are untrustworthy. You want to renegotiate the deal you made with him in a way that is more advantageous to you without any regard or concern about how it may make him feel.

Women like you are the reason why men don't want to get married. You change the rules and the agreements at whim and when you can't get what you want you bail our and cash out.

Here's a tip for you. Why don't you try equating your self-worth to your achievements and the good things you do in the world rather than whether you can get some guy to buy you shit.

Finally, your boyfriend doesn't need to ask you for permission to go on a trip. You aren't his mother or his wife. You aren't even his life partner. You are a woman who has agreed to sexual exclusivity and that is all you are.

He cares for you but only in the context of the relationship you both agreed to. Yet, you expect him to do more than what was promised.

You should be proud that he keeps his word and is so reliable. But you aren't and that shows that it's really you who doesn't care about him.

You care about yourself and expect him to serve you.

This was an outstanding reply in the original thread. 10/10

getRedPill · 2015-10-26T13:49:45+00:00

being the “rich benefactor”.

The other thing that almost made me throw up was when I learned that he paid for the funeral

Let's put this straight. She says she's a "Strong Independent wymyn" and not a gold digger, but she gets upset by silly things like splitting the tab, besides the fact he told her she isn't getting his money since the beginning.

Then she sees him as cheap and not caring too much about her, because of this decides to end up the relationship (and he responded very well to her move that she got backslapped).

This is when she learns he' s not that uncaring about her because he paid for cat and her dad's funeral. This is when she instead of recognizing him as a charitable good hearted man sees him as beta instead and get pukes.

Bitches that's why you can't have anything good in life, never.

FrameWalker · 2015-10-26T16:51:48+00:00

You've gotta commend Marc for being a man, and it's easy to feel good about the girl fucking up for being a greedy gold digger. What's really interesting is that the woman feels genuinely distraught and torn up about not getting her BBs.

Marc held frame absolutely. Honestly he'll have no problem upgrading. Amused mastery could've extended the relationship but for what reason?

John_E_Vegas · 2015-10-26T16:52:20+00:00

She's an idiot. But not for "throwing it all away." She never had anything to begin with except what sounds like a wealthy fuck buddy.

If she was looking for a husband, she should have listened to what he said at the very beginning: no children, no marriage, separate bank accounts, etc.

What part of that sounded like a good deal for a woman who wants to be provided for?

[deleted] · 2015-10-27T00:19:26+00:00

I liked her last ditch attempt to make him jealous by declaring her interest in another man from high school, knowing he was reading her post. Classic.

LyricBaritone · 2015-10-27T18:58:49+00:00

Haha. This girl fucked up what was a completely healthy, productive relationship, because she is too lazy and greedy to support herself. She'll be looking for those Beta Bux now.

DevilMayCry · 2015-10-26T05:57:14+00:00

This guy is the fucking man! If every man in this sub was just a little bit like Marc they'd go a long way.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T12:54:06+00:00

http://i.imgur.com/zD4X8.gif

Trucks_N_Chainsaws · 2015-10-26T13:16:34+00:00

Dude sounds a lot like me. My gf, now of 8 years, and I had the same marriage/kids discussion after three months. She said, "I'm fine with that. I'd rather have a career." And this is when i was struggling. I've since increased my income by 450% and do whatever the fuck I want short of fucking other chicks. It's a pretty good deal.

1NV0K3R · 2015-10-26T13:25:54+00:00

Ahahahahaahahaahah

Two words.

Get. Fuckt.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T21:04:27+00:00

I don't understand the frequent refrain that men shouldn't lie to women. This event illustrates the folly of such an approach. "Marc" made one serious error: he told his woman the truth. Women HATE the truth .

What he should have done is lied his ass off, motivated her to bring the heat in the bedroom via false hope of a relationship and then straight ghosted when she tried to lock him down.

Screw being honorable and upfront. Women dont care and will bulldoze your moral code along with your freedom if it suits their interests. There are no pacts between men and lions, or women and men in 21st Century Western society.

Some will find the above worryingly harsh. I invite such critics to wake the hell up. Modern women are playing for keeps, and so should we.

KickinWangg · 2015-10-26T21:28:27+00:00

OP- please keep us updated on your PM conversation with him as i would be extremely interested on hearing what he has to say and hearing his side of the story

[deleted] · 2015-10-27T14:20:47+00:00

That third update.... I bet you Marc is one of us ;)

FateBender · 2015-10-27T19:17:53+00:00

That's one of the best descriptions of a man who's "on his path" that I've ever seen. Hats off.

throwaway320_ · 2015-10-31T00:22:31+00:00

Did the guy from the PM ever got back to you?

Temptationn · 2015-12-14T08:57:29+00:00

you know you made it when your gf makes a post about you and not the other way around.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T06:45:18+00:00

Jesus this couldn't be a more cut & dry case of entitled bitch mentality.

Good for that guy, he's got the right attitude. It's his fucking money, what the hell would she be saying if he came up to her and asked "why don't you buy me dinner ever? we always split the bill... don't you care about me?"

She acts like he's spending all HIS money on some other girl, he's spending it on himself for the love of god. Good for him not giving an inch, this guy is pure gold.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T12:21:42+00:00

Reading something like this really puts a smile on my face. Thanks OP.

pilledwillingly · 2015-10-26T13:05:59+00:00

Holy fuck this dude is the motherfucking man.

ztsmart · 2015-10-26T13:14:39+00:00

Dat sense of entitlement doe

jaysire · 2015-10-26T13:16:40+00:00

"Good on you girl, you're better off without him!" /s

razorbeamzz · 2015-10-26T16:07:01+00:00

I hate these threads. Archive.is is blocked in my country. :(

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T16:21:41+00:00

id like to hear the guys side of this

Rathadin · 2015-10-26T16:52:58+00:00

Man, this is too good... /u/riseanew actually accused me of being Marc, despite having been a redditor for over 2 years (which I know would not preclude the possibility that I am Marc... but I am not... sadly).

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T17:04:09+00:00

I love red pill because of such posts.

Moneyley · 2015-10-26T17:04:37+00:00

this is what happens to equal rights advocates. Equality isnt equality if it involves me paying, even if its the same as you.

[–]IdiocyInc -1 points 11 hours ago Sure, but that's the new equality thing, isn't it? Splitting dinner bills, each doing their own thing, etc?

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T17:48:59+00:00

Being a gold digger is a lot like being a racist. If you have to say "I'm not a gold digger" you probably doing some gold digging shit

CrimsonTideCosby · 2015-10-26T18:41:38+00:00

She was in a relationship with him. He was just regular-fucking her.

CornyHoosier · 2015-10-26T18:54:30+00:00

I skimmed some of what she wrote ... This guy who "doesn't pay for anything" (which apparently a person can say without being a gold digger) literally paid for her fathers funeral and some surgery for her cat.

This woman is a fool.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T19:27:41+00:00

If you read all three posts you find that she's either making the whole thing up or only adding certain information so she can get the opinions and moral support she wants.

At first she just says he's a "lone wold" type and doesn't have friends.

Then in the next thread she says he's a surgeon who works 70 hours a week. And of course, he's a selfish prick for not also spending more time with her and less time saving people's lives.

Also, in the second thread she speaks to a "friend" of his who tells her he's a rabid cheater.

In the last thread she only mentions he's wealthy and that he's very against cheating. What a turn around and certainly it's hard to understand why someone who is apparently so idle and has time to travel so much won't spend more time with his woman.

Oh, and that trip he supposed took for a month without asking her about? He only took it after she announced to him that she was going to be unavailable to him for 2 weeks.

So, he's a jerk for not consulting her but she's not a jerk for not consulting him about ignoring him for two weeks.

Frankly, I thought it was considerate of him to schedule a vacation during a time when his girlfriend was going to be too busy with work. At least then they wouldn't lose more time together than they had too. Alas, no one sees it like that, cuz man bad, woman victim won't fit.

Oakwood2317 · 2015-10-26T19:36:51+00:00

Your quotation marks lead me to believe you are a German.....

NPK5667 · 2015-10-26T20:44:50+00:00

They want tradition when it benefits them. Funny.

Momo_dollar · 2015-10-27T00:25:12+00:00

He seems to be a guy who values loyaty and time shared. He gave her his greatest gift; his loyalty, time, and commitment and that wasn't enough for her.

She don't deserve him, and he deserves a stronger minded and more disciplined woman.

rp_valiant · 2015-10-27T02:01:19+00:00

OP, you should definitely reach out to this guy for further info, for science. Did he contact you off the back of a comment on one of the original threads, or did he see your thread here in TRP? The whole relationship smells of a well-played-out red pill relationship, so I do have to wonder whether he's actually a member here.

joshbeoulve · 2015-10-27T03:25:11+00:00

EDIT 3:

Holy shit dude, post an update from the guy please.

tallwheel · 2015-10-26T05:59:22+00:00

Haha. Marc sounds just like me... with maybe a bit more money. But I do have a lot more money than my LTR and hardly ever spend anything on her.

YuriJackoffski · 2015-10-26T07:04:48+00:00

Haha bitch got rekt and owned

NawtVolkishEnuf · 2015-10-27T02:14:14+00:00

Dude probably has Schizoid Personality Disorder, as do a lot of the guys you'd probably consider "Sigma". He's still a good example of holding it down and maintaining your frame, but it's not a lifestyle that every man should emulate. Having meaningful friendships and wanting a family is perfectly fine.

She thought she could change him, and she couldn't. No need to get too deep into this.

nastynasthrowaway · 2015-10-26T10:42:25+00:00

Why did you feel the need to put (black) in brackets like that? What difference does it make what color she is? I like this sub but theres always some sly lowkey racist shit in here.

zuchit · 2015-10-26T06:53:20+00:00

Huge respect to that guy who enjoys his solitude. I can relate to his

no friends, only “acquaintances”

mentality. I can honestly say there are only 4-5 people from my school/ uni life that I consider as my true friends. Nowadays, it's very rare to find people like him and that is one of the reason why I'm in solitude. I enjoy things more that way.

Red_Pill_Raskol · 2015-10-26T07:34:24+00:00

This is an unusual but very interesting genesis story of an alpha-widow.

Mature_Student · 2015-10-26T09:03:49+00:00

This man is a case study in TRP, good for him.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T09:12:05+00:00

the one bit that stuck out to me the most was her description of his clothing. i've never actually heard of somebody dressing gothninja in real life.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T09:29:25+00:00

Marc sounds like a cool dude.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T10:45:38+00:00

The frame of this guy gave me shivers.

Hennez · 2015-10-26T12:54:35+00:00

A great read to start the day!

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T13:10:37+00:00

"I'm not even worth one dinner to him."

And he is not worth one dinner to her. So where's the problem? We don't hear him complaining that she doesn't treat him to dinner.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T13:49:05+00:00

A lot of good comments on this board.

A lot of people are calling her a gold digger, ESPECIALLY from the male side.

Its only some of the parasitic hypocritical women that have an alternative perspective on this issue.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T14:22:51+00:00

"I'm not a gold digger but why doesn't he spend his money on me??" Because your a gold digger. Plain and simple.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T14:24:52+00:00

Maybe it's Marc Rudov. He is against spending money on a women to get into her pants.

Jessie_James · 2015-10-26T14:25:10+00:00

I tell people this all the time, but always get downvoted. When you're in a situation like this, that is the time to put on your best behavior and not throw a tantrum. All she had to do was realize he was a high quality man, and she had to improve herself to be the same. Instead, she acted like a spoiled little brat and got kicked to the curb.

Big surprise he didn't want to date a woman who acted like a princess.

NiftyDolphin · 2015-10-26T14:41:29+00:00

Poe's Law, when you recognize the truth, but that truth is so fucked up as to be indistinguishable from parody.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T16:23:22+00:00

The friends thing hit hard. Women love their social networks, and in general they are massive. But have also noticed that they have no problem shit talking 90% of their friends behind their back. Even if it's not legit hate but nags about "she can be a slut though" or "but isn't her doing x weird"

Meanwhile I pride myself on having ~5 or so guy friends with friendships that are iron clad. Don't get me wrong, have other friends too just through work and history but could easily sustain myself with that small handful.

bloodfoxtrue · 2015-10-26T18:16:24+00:00

Don’t get me wrong I’m not a gold digger

That denial... I'd be surprised if there was a gold digger that can actually admit they are indeed one.

I got emotional and nearly cried, telling him I need a break and he acts so immature sometimes and doesn’t consider my feelings at all.

Oh boo hoo. Yeah, take as long as you want. In fact, don't come back. She fails to see she is the immature, dramatic one. She wants to be pampered to the fullest, but recklessly cuts off the money faucet. Reminds me of SJWs... it's really more about "feelings", rather than logic.

BramRhodesDouglas · 2015-10-26T18:21:20+00:00

The craziest thing about this is that I bet he would have doted on her heavily if she earned it. He seems like a totally rational guy who would reward her with more commitment if she worked for it. But she's clueless, she has no idea what a man wants.

akrebsie · 2015-10-26T18:45:31+00:00

I really like this Marc guy......we should totally hang out sometime.

BlackHeart89 · 2015-10-26T18:45:56+00:00

Smh. Clearly she wasn't happy with the relationship. She just found his money and looks very appealing. Smh

People need to be more self-aware. She should have walked from the very beginning when he laid down the law. Anyone who gives you the warning up front is no bullshitter.

[deleted] · 2015-10-26T19:42:04+00:00

The only thing he can be criticized for is that he doesn't have a social circle otherwise he would be perfect. With that said, I think the only reason the girls told her that he is immature and he should be dumped is because they want a chance at him and they are probably secretly jealous of her having a wealthy, manly boyfriend so instead of helping her rise up they would just drag her down to their level. And I think the girl in question only dated him anyway because she wanted to "fix him" since that is the motivator for dating dangerous or mysterious people.

All in all, I mean as long as the guy gives no fucks I see no problem with what he is doing or anything for that matter. Just the whole aforementioned lack of social circle and even if so, as long as he is happy in solitude the social circle is pretty much a strong recommendation.

Thu Jan 1 0:00:00 1970 UTC

[permanently deleted]

ChadThundercockII · 2015-10-26T20:51:32+00:00

I like this 'Marc! guy. We should get him on here and flood him with questions. I would help establish a base for a beginner's guide.

Edit: We should also have a side bar post named after this guy. Be like Marc, in contrast with don't be like Bruce.

Its_All_Been_Done · 2015-10-26T22:16:52+00:00

Dear u/confusedwiththis ...

Title	Girl is in a relationship with a wealthy alpha that maintains impeccable frame and doesn’t put up with her shit tests. She feels neglected and hurt (hamstering ensues)
Author	yamato403
Upvotes	1015
Comments	524
Date	26 October 2015 04:04 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	TheRedPill
Link	https://theredarchive.com/post/37541
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/3q8kvz/girl_is_in_a_relationship_with_a_wealthy_alpha/