summary: I have been wanting to fuck this girl for 2-3 weeks now, and finally sealed the deal after being dealt a hilarious shit test.

Background on me, I’m 5’11 medium build, reasonably attractive 28 year old. I pretty much adore Tinder. It’s quite possibly the most effective and easiest ways to weed out timewasters and fuck girls.

I match with this 6ft 22 year old blonde with big tits and a huge ass from down under. Not the most amazing face, but she was sexy as fuck. I always have wanted to fuck a chick taller then me, one for the old bucket list. We go out on a date 2 weeks ago and she mentions how shes in town till 8th December, and shes back home for 6 weeks. She also plans to come back in January. In my first ever message to her I said that “we haven’t got long then do we ;-)”

We meet and she likes the fact that I’m into her despite being just a tad shorter. We meet for 2 drinks, and I tell her I had to run (great idea from another member of TRP to double book tinder dates) so we kiss and I make a dash.

Date two we meet in a swanky bar in town, and were drinking and hanging out last Sunday. She mentions how shes in a hotel round the corner. So we naturally go there, and she won’t let me in. I have a personal theory of 3-5 dates as I’m sure more of you do too. No fuck in that time, and it’s over. As I kiss her bye, she mentions theres a gig she’d like to go to Thursday (aka last night), and we should check it out.

The entire journey home I was thinking about that gig, and seeing if it was worth paying for it, however I found a good deal. I bit the bullet, and told her to meet me at the venue.

We arrange to meet at the gig, as it was only 10 mins from my office, and we go to the gig, to which she dressed unbelievably well for. She’s all over me, kissing me, grinding, I knew it was on. So naturally I got the drinks flowing, we did rounds, it was fantastic. We saw nothing of the gig.

As we leave the venue, she starts acting cold. “We never saw the concert, I’m too drunk, I’m this and that…” I ignored her, and kept walking in the direction of taxis which were 10 mins from the venue. She then goes “Were not right for eachother.”

I thought fair enough, I’m shorter slightly, shes a big buxom girl, but I still ignored her. Tears came into her eyes “I’m not good enough for you.” I stopped and said “you need to get a grip.”

She then rants “you have money, your life sorted, what the fuck am I doing, I can barely afford some of those rounds, I’m just not rich. I’m nothing, I’m a bum, and here we are doing these amazing things together, I just feel…I don’t know, I’m just…” she waffled for 5 minutes straight.

I stopped her and said “look, money, all that shit. It doesn’t matter, I like spending time with you, and that’s all that matters” I couldn’t believe in my drunk state I came across so chilled and calm.

We walked into a bar, and naturally she calmed down. She turns and goes “thanks for calming me down.” I said to her “sometimes women just want to talk, so just let them talk” she laughed.

As she was doing so, I ordered an uber taxi on the sly, we both got in, I turned to her “where you staying again” and she goes “oh XYZ” we drive off. The radio’s playing and were singing along to cheesy songs and shes in the “happy mood” once again. She mentions to me how she thought I didn’t like her on our first date as I left after an hour. I told her “youre talking again….shhh”

We go back to the hotel and fuck like crazy. It was just wonderful. One more for the bucket list, what a body. She offers me to stay but I insist on leaving, after having a bit more fun. As I leave she tells me “see you when I’m back for sure” aka January 2016, to which I didn’t mind, I’d love her as a plate.

But as I leave, I see on her phone a few messages, and sneakily looked to see one from a dude saying “hey lets not beat around the bush, wanna come round this weekend??”

I felt weird at first, but smiled and remember this was a tinder girl. This is what the game is. But I was glad to have my round, and hold my frame. Will I message her again? I’m not sure now, however January is just around the corner. Plus her body is banging. But she won't be taken out anymore. It'll be just sex. I did my work.

Lessons learnt: Frame is important. Its vital. I almost cracked by being too nice, but I still knew I had to seal the deal no matter what. The beta me would have let her go home alone and be emotional. I rode the wave, and got what I wanted.

Women just talk, gentleman. Don’t take it too personally. In fact she said after the first time we fucked “I actually had no idea what I was saying.” God bless TRP.