How to Flirt with Women: Flirting 101

Summary: Flirting with women is a concept that is lost on most guys. Let's face it - most men are clueless when it comes to HOW to flirt with women effectively.

So what we're going to discuss today are my three hottest bits of dating advice for men that will expose the mistakes men make when trying to flirt with women.

Flirt mistake 1: Waiting too long to approach or start the conversation.

If there's any dating advice for men that stands the test of time, it's this one. Women are estimating your confidence level based on how long you wait until you approach. The longer it takes, the more interest and attraction she loses for you.

The second she notices you, and knows that you have noticed her, a timer starts in her head. And if you hesitate, that tells her you're not as confident as she wants you to be. And if it takes TOO LONG, she's going to find it creepy that you're looking and not doing something.

So here's my advice for men who want to avoid this mistake:

The second you see an attractive woman, your mind is going to try to stop you from going over to meet her. And there is no logical reason why for this, other than you feel a natural hesitation.

Just get into the habit of walking over within 3 seconds of seeing a woman you want to meet. 1-2-3. Showtime.

You don't need a clever line to get her to talk to you. (In fact, using 'lines' on women often makes them more reluctant to talk.) Say hello and get right to it. Don't try to be smooth.

Flirt mistake 2: Flirting with your mouth instead of your whole body.

Guys often make the mistake of being a bit too direct when they talk with women. The most important thing to recognize about women is that they like "indirectly direct" communication. Meaning that you can flirt-talk with her, but you have to give her "plausible deniability" the whole time you're talking with her.

What is "Plausible deniability"? It's the ability for a woman to deny that she had taken the lead or initiative in flirting or leading you on. She wants to hint to you that she's interested, but she often can't because of the amount of social pressure put on women to not be the pursuer. She also wants to be chased herself, so you want to give her the ability to write her own story about how it all happened.

So here's my dating advice for men who want to avoid this mistake:

Instead of saying things like: "Wow, you sure are beautiful..." or "God must be missing an angel up in heaven...", find ways of communicating your appreciation with your body language.

One of the best ways you can make a woman feel cherished and appreciated is simply to use more eye contact. Just look from eye to eye, and occasionally let your eyes stray down to her lips - or to her hair. This shows that you're taking her in and find her attractive without sounding like a dork.

Just remember that appreciating does not mean "ogling." You can visually appreciate a woman without looking like you're imagining her naked. (Save that for later...)

Flirt mistake 3: Asking for a date instead of just a small "upsell."

This is a frequent mistake guys make. They will go talk to a woman, get things going, and then end it with: "Hey, you want to go out on a date sometime?"

You can see the complete change in her eyes and her expression when he does this.

Asking for the date is a big turn off when it's done too soon. It's like walking onto a used car lot, and after only 2 minutes of small talk, the salesman asks you to come in and fill out the paperwork. Whoah!

Even on the phone, you don't want to jump in too far, too fast. Remember that a man represents a whole bunch of "what ifs" to a woman, and your goal is to not start dancing in the minefield of her anxieties and blow things up.

Instead, the best dating advice for this situation is that you go for the easy "upsell." So here's my dating advice for men who want to avoid this mistake flirting with women:

If you've ever gone to McDonalds, you've been offered an "upsell" at one point or another. You probably heard it like this: "Would you like fries with that?"

It's a brilliant marketing strategy that has increased McDonald's revenues massively. Just by offering a small add-on, we're more likely to agree to it.

Don't ask for the date. Instead, just ask for a quick cup of coffee or tea. A small meeting like this is non-assuming, and will get a much higher acceptance rate from women. They won't see it as threatening, and they'll see it as a legit way to actually get to know you.

PLUS you'll radically reduce the amount of flakes you get. (Most women flake on dates because she just forgets if she was really into you in the first place. She cooled off.)

So there you go. Three of my hottest flirting tips for men that you can put to use RIGHT NOW.

The Lesson: Flirting in a nutshell.