The Red Pill is a journey down the rabbit hole of a new reality. After digging a while, you reach pretty dark places.
That's what happened to me too. At some point, I realized that the nature of the game truly was amoral: that things like caring and niceness were not needed at any level, even the subconscious one. I realized that I could do and get whatever I wanted if I knew how, with next to no negative consequences. No universal justice was there to punish me, no karma, no retribution.
I've always been a romantic at heart. Even after swallowing the pill, I used to think that a baseline of "decency" was not only moral but necessary. That's not just not true, but a sad limiting belief that hurts you both: you do not understand decency while you're still thinking like that.
I experimented with total selfishness, pushing things as far as I could get them to go, putting what I wanted front and center. I consciously deadened any instincts towards "caring"; in hindsight, I now realize I wasn't "caring" at all, I was protecting my own worldview and my emotional attachment to it, and in so doing underserving both me and the girl.
The best sex I've ever had came after that; after realizing that the union of male and female is supposed to come about a certain way, which is not the way mainstream culture depicts at all. The male principle is strength, direction, dominance; the female principle caring, following, submission.
Where before I had self-limited or even had to force out my dominance, I just let it flow freely. Where before I had been in my head worried about what to do, I just went with what I wanted to do. Where I used to worry, before and after, about the quality of my performance, I simply didn't.
The difference was night and day. I went from feeling as if sex was as much work as it was pleasure, to pure primal pleasure. I went from worrying too much to not worrying at all. I went from doubting my results to being assured of them. I went from inconstant results to constant ones.
For a good while, observing this reality unfolding before me was depressing. It made me think that there was something wrong: if women and I enjoyed sex the most if I treated them, as I perceived it, like worthless pieces of fuckmeat, then something must have been wrong. Right?
Of course not. Absolutely not. I only understood it in hindsight. You are not showing appreciation for a woman when you're behaving like a supplicant beta male, not in the slightest. The height of appreciation for a woman is receiving the attention, even passing, of a valuable alpha male; being treated "like a worthless piece of fuckmeat" means receiving the attention of a male who is at the top of the sexual desirability scale, which is the very best appreciation you could ever shower on a woman. No woman I ever treated like this complained about it, or looked to be feeling devalued.
You give a fuck by not giving a fuck. By being true to your male role, you honor her female role.
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