LINK: http :// www.msn.com/en-us/entertainment/celebrity/chris-pratt-and-anna-faris-insane-split-shocked-friends-source-says-they-were-so-in-love/ar-AApK0Vz?li=BBmkt5R&ocid=spartandhp

Summary:

The nuclear walking dread machine now known as Chris Pratt has nuked his wife's hamster from outer space. Plebes are 'shocked'. TRP saw this coming from a mile away.

Body:

Anna Faris married some no-name guy a decade ago and he was probably happy to be under her wing. But now he's a mega Hollywood superstar hitting his stride while she's starting to show her age.

Veterans immediately understood what happened next: she was hit with what u/BluepillProfessor would call DREAD Level 9000. This dude was probably getting his socks blown every damn night, every damn way imaginable as she had that unnerving realization that she needs to work to keep her man locked down. Women are probably throwing pussy at his forehead splat left and right. She's gonna be inundated by an avalanche of competition just as she's passing her prime.

Alas, it was all for naught. He mercifully put her hamster out of its misery. Probably gave her a nice severance package and will visit and who knows he might let her hit that every now and then even.

Chris Pratt did pretty damn well for himself. He's basically the Anti-Brendan Frasier. His route was similar to The Rock's:

  • married w/ children before success
  • super stardom
  • separation on his own terms during ascension
  • mega stardom

This doesn't look like a divorce rape either.

Something tells me he either :

  • had a solid pre-nup
  • she wasn't going to get anything too big out of it since she's still working as well
  • she deeesssperately was trying to hold on to him thus was in no position to negotiate with her insta-Alpha.

It's clear from the video and the look on her eyes in many articles since his 3 movies went gangbusters that they've been working out a deal for several months now.

Lessons Learned:

  • Many men hit their prime later in life (ages at which women start to descend)
  • Marry a younger wife if you're going to (1/2 your age + 7 is the old adage)
  • Doesn't matter what you were before, once you gain high status you will induce dread in your partner whether you like it or not