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[FR] how hanging with some beta friends showed me how far I've come on my TRP journey

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[deleted]
November 12, 2017
738 upvotes

This post is for the new guys just starting their TRP journey, as I myself was in your shoes not too long ago. It's a reminder that with self-improvement, digesting the sidebar, and by NGAF you will be able to not only see results, but be able to see how far you have come just by interacting with people.

I had a couple moments over the past few weeks that helped put into perceptive all the things I have been trying to improve upon since taking TRP. This all came after hanging out with some beta friends of mine recently and observing behaviors that I know I exhibited before I found this sub. This is not a bash on my friends, but more a reflection of what practicing what you learn here can change you for the better.

Case 1: Went out with some friends for one of their birthdays and one of my buddies said he was bring his new girl around. He has been hanging out with her for over 4 months and never made a move. I can tell instantly that this girl is using him as an orbiter, but has no real intention of letting him get any. She immediately starts flirting with me and I can tell it is making my friend angry. I flirt back a little, but I draw a line, as I don't think it is worth losing friends over one girl. Gaining an abundance mentality has truly helped me not get hung up on every encounter. After some time we start talking about frolfing and she says she's never gone, but would love to go tomorrow if I was free. I told her I had to work, but my friend was a pro and could show her how to play. I figured if she said yes it would put my buddy in a good spot for some kino and 1 on 1 time. She seemed into it until he opened his month. Immediately he lets her know that it's not a date and tells her he will bring his younger brother along. I was shocked at first. I set the kid up for the easy layup and he missed by a mile. Then it sunk in on the ride home, I was that guy not even a year ago. Too afraid of losing one girl out of fear of when the next one will come along. Jealous when the girl that was not even mine, got attention from someone else. I was at first mad at myself for ever behaving like this, but as I thought about it I was so glad that I had seen the light. No one girl is worth the frustration my buddy is putting himself though. Playing the friend card will only make you an orbiter.

Case 2: Went out to a beer festival with some friends of mine and ended the night at a bar near one of their places. The bar was pretty dead, but our bartender was very attractive. After going up to the bar to grab a round I can tell she is into me and I start to banter with her. The next couple times I grab a beer she starts talking with me and I kept negging her about not remember that my last name starts with a C and not a K. She's loving it, but my friends see it differently. She comes to our table multiple times just to talk and I continue to tease her the entire time. When she leaves the table my friends keep telling me to stop being an asshole to her. They were going to be her white knights. I just laughed it off and tell them it's not a big deal. The night ends with her following us outside as we get ready to leave and I ask her for her number. She gave it without hesitation and my friends are floored. They don't get why treating a potential plate as I did ended up with positive results. It was a good reminder that nice guys finish last. It got me thinking today about how fear of rejection use to cripple my chances. By not putting pussy on a pedestal you take all the pressure off yourself. Learn to hold frame and what you found so hard six months ago will over time come naturally to you.

In conclusion: What I've learned coming to TRP is that really what this is teaching you is a set of skills to get what you want out of life. Keep busy, learn new things, talk to everyone interesting, go for what you want and create a life you can be proud of. Over time this will seem less like a task and just who you are. It won't happen over night. If you fail today, know that tomorrow brings another chance to sink or swim. Practice a life of abundance and reap the rewards. Don't just take what the sub is teaching to pick up women. Instead, use it in all aspects of your life. Make it who you are. That is when you will see the results you are looking for.


Post Information
Title [FR] how hanging with some beta friends showed me how far I've come on my TRP journey
Author
Upvotes 738
Comments 79
Date 12 November 2017 01:18 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/47083
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/7ccfp3/fr_how_hanging_with_some_beta_friends_showed_me/
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Red Pill terms found in post:
betaabundanceframeorbiterkinoplatewhite knightthe red pillpedestal
Comments

[–][deleted] 143 points144 points  (0 children) | Copy

I love this.

I'm looking forward to making results like this come true for myself as well.

[–]alarumba 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

I'm still in a transitional phase. Had a brilliantly stupid moment over the weekend. Had a cute friend of the friend talking one on one with me. I'm still shit at telling but she seemed into me. We we're talking about pets and I showed off photos of my dog as a puppy. Said that you could not say no to those eyes. She said , "do you like big eyes?" staring right at me. "What, like anime?"

It was just so stupid, all I can do is laugh and move on. Her enthusiasm to talk to me stalled but we struck up another conversation later. Will be seeing her again.

[–][deleted] 58 points59 points  (9 children) | Copy

Just remember to keep it light, ask questions, and let her do most of the talking. Be a mystery and have her ask questions to get any personal info about you. Big thing I learned is that the more time you spend taking with a potential plate hurts your chances. Talk for awhile, get her number, and get out if you don't think you can score that night. Your sole attention should not be on one girl while out with friends.

[–]aBetterNation19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy

Women always fill in the gaps of what they don't know with some crazy awesome illusion of yourself. Less talking- always.

[–]Trooper_186837 points38 points  (1 child) | Copy

Like anime. Damn thats funny. I would probably say the same :P

[–]Naebany9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

Seems like she wanted him to kiss her though.

[–]Robocompany2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

How do you tease without actually coming off as rude or an asshole? I've always found it difficult to hop along the line. Any tips?

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't care if you are rude or an asshole. Don't go out of your way to be a rude asshole, just let it come naturally- and don't care. The "not caring" is what attracts women.

[–]Rian_Stone3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

coming off as rude or an asshole?

You can't control how others think. you'll come off as you come off.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Keep it light and playful. If they think you are an ass, their loss. Most girls will eat it up, while the orbiters will try to use it to ruin your flow. Just hold frame and if she's into you, you'll have a lot of lead on the rope. If not, well move on. You got better stuff to do.

[–]Robocompany1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thank you senpai. I shall keep that in mind.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (11 children) | Copy

The autism is strong with this one.

[–]alarumba 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

Afraid so. But I'm working on it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy

Quite honestly, your story is depressing and unfunny (Although funny for redditors - no surprise) Turn off the anime, go outside and lift weights.

[–]alarumba 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

I'm at a stage where I can laugh it off. There was a time that I would be hyper critical and would act like it's the end of the world. And I was at a party with a pretty lady taking the time to talk to me, so going outside and exercising is working.

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points  (6 children) | Copy

You're a big boy now, aren't you? Heres a gold star.

[–]alarumba 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

And you're wasting your time acting like a badass to someone that isn't gonna be convinced. Keep self hating yourself, redditor.

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Truth is, I could smell the beta-rage in you a mile away - and I clearly brought it out. Welcome to TRP. If you're still mad, turn to the gym and not to miss 2d suki.

[–]alarumba 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

I'm not responsible for this person being deleted, just noticed as I went to reply.

But man, whatta dick...

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

BTW, I watch anime. I don't tell new plates if they are not fans themselves, but at the end of the day, just be yourself. As you said you are in the transitional stage. You can't learn from your mistakes if you don't review them. Keep it up and keep it light.

[–]powerbaseballfan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

whats the point of being so serious about it if you truly dngaf

[–]allrandomworldnews6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

That is the moment were you got to look her in the eyes. Smile at her and say “yes of course“, hold eye contact and if she smiles back at you go in for the kiss.

If she likes you she wont resist. If she resists nothing was lost and you give your attention another girl.

[–]grandmazboy2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Look at her with a raised eyebrow.."Big eyes?"

Use two seconds to have a quick glance at her chest, "Big tits are better" and smirk.

Cue giggles.

[–]LittleRedditAddict22 points23 points  (6 children) | Copy

Sorry to tell you, but barring changes by them, you're going to lose them as friends anyway. At least as you know it currently, and that's a good thing. There's only so many hours in a day and you can't waste your time on losers. You'll probably think I'm harsh until a dozen or so times that they try to undercut you and you learn the hard way. Posts on changes in friend interaction are too few and far between, but most will express the same sentiments. Good luck.

[–]m0rphing7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, the key here is "barring changes by them". But you can at least try to help out your beta buddies by giving them little bits of advice here and there. Don't full out talk TRP with them, but push them in the right direction. Some of them might be receptive to it. The ones who continue to be beta bitches and insist on ruining your flow will have to be cut out of your life or at least demoted to acquaintance.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

No actually, I know you are right. The guys from the second example are not going to change. They are the buddies I go to beer events with, but normally I don't call them when I'm looking to go out to talk to girls. The guy from the first case is actually my favorite friend to go out with to pick up chicks. He works in the bar scene and has a great social circle. He's social with girls, but thinks the way into their pants is by being a friend first, so I know he is not competition. He's a great wingman, as he does a lot of stuff right, he's just got the end game so wrong.

[–]LittleRedditAddict5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Nothing wrong with different friends for different occasions. Have fun.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I always thought the Crab Bucket image was not adequate. These White Knights use a lot more weapons than natural claws and they do a lot more than just try to drag you into the bucket. Your best "friend" will stomp on your face to get closer to a used up smelly snatch.

Your occasional friends and acquaintances will go out of their way to sabotage you and then laugh in your face.

[–]1Shadowsduh80 points81 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yea you start to notice smaller and smaller workings of TRP in the world as time passes.

[–]Best_By_Death33 points34 points  (5 children) | Copy

I cringed at those and I'm sure other RPs would too. I remember tip-toeing just like that but just can't remember why now.

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (4 children) | Copy

Think these are bad? I have a buddy who's girl dumped him a year ago and last time I saw him he cried for an hour about her. I just got up and walked away. Let the ladies in the group handle that one. Haha

[–]Best_By_Death12 points13 points  (3 children) | Copy

Essentially the busier he gets, the tougher life obstacles he faces and overcomes, the more your friend will become RP. Then learn some female psychology and manipulation (not the same as psychology taught in schools). That's all.

Additionally, the manipulation part is very useful for all other aspects of life aswell and not just for sexual success alone.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Agreed, been telling him for months to get busy and focus on himself. We game together at night, as we both get off super late after work. I've been slowly spoon feeding his RP truths and he takes some and leaves others. His problem is he doesn't have much value at the moment and only wants a LTR. Dude needs to mellow out and just have some fun.

[–]DerangedDiphthong0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Where would be the best sources to learn said psychology and manipulation??

[–]Airskycloudface0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

start fucking with people. go drive somewhere far from where you live and chat people the fuck up.

[–]Jailhouseredpilled9314 points15 points  (1 child) | Copy

Being an asshole to hot girls is anathema to Betas. Before TRP when someone negged a girl I would get embarrassed for her! My own male solipsism would see her red face and interpret that as embarrassment. Oh how blind I was!!!

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Red face indicates increased blood flow and lubrication.

[–]zboo1h11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy

I work in education. Most of my coworkers are women. Whenever I meet their boyfriends or husbands or whatever, I'm always secretly shocked. One of my coworkers routinely emasculates her beta boy whenever we have get-togethers. She'll mock him for balding or being short or skinny, or having a shittier job than her. He just smiles and remains quiet like a good boy. This is while she takes every opportunity to touch me, talk to me, "accidentally" push into me when crossing paths.

Discovering TRP is one of the most important things to have ever happened to me.

[–]-PurSang-10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm tagging you as future me.

Please keep updating us with the kind of things you are able to notice more and more with time ;)

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

All interactions with women clearer with TRP. And all interactions become better when treating them like little girls who never grew up

[–]Spartan1590 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

This has inspired me to talk about an awkward experience I had with a friend of mine and his girlfriend, they've been together for 4 years now. I just have the standard IDGAF attitude with her as with most people I know, being playful, standard TRP manual.

I went to a party with them, she started giving me IOIs by the dozens, and it was quickly becoming uncomfortable that I was feeling guilty... I knew that she just might cheat on him someday or maybe this LTR won't last forever. If I was an an inconsiderate asshole with one of my best friends, I'd be a possible catalyst to end it...

It's really just your turn, and we can just learn to deal with it, nothing more.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy

I wish my buddy could understand this. This same girl has been all over me every time I see her. Touching, flirting, seeking me out when I'm talking to other people, and out of respect I turn her down every time. Hell, she even invited me to sleep at her place right in front of him. He told me her loves her and I'm pretty sure he hasn't seen her naked yet. Dude is about to get his heart broken for no reason. This is why abundance is so important.

[–]mishasam89-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's really just your turn

dude, you make it sound like it's just like going to an escort.. lol

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Take the Red Pill Bro. Unfortunately the Pill is also a suppository. If you won't swallow it, at some point it is going to get shoved up your ass.

[–]allrandomworldnews10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy

You should also add that your friends are probably socially retarded when it comes to body language. Else they would stfu about you negging her because they would see that she is into it.

Always give body language more value then words!

[–]goldenhourlivin7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

Solid post. As someone new to TRP, stuff like this makes me feel like I can't fucking wait to finish the sidebar reading. Only things stopping me from mowing it all down right now are two exams I'm studying for.

[–]Thinkingard5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy

Sounds like you're on the right path and finding out how easy it is, at least in comparison to the old BP ways. When I think back of how BP I used to be I just shake my head in disgust with how many opportunities I threw away. I could of had a very feminine and cool girlfriend but I smothered her in beta-tude and pushed her away within a week. Another chick I found decently attractive, and maybe could have had some fun with, but I was too concerned that I wasn't attracted enough to her, and well, I was looking to wife someone up, because I am Christian, you know? Lol. That meant I had to have severe oneitus for a girl to even give her a shot, when I myself wasn't much for them. Stupid, right? Well, sometimes a BP is stuck in a specific worldview that is nothing but toxic for him and he doesn't realize it.

That's why it's so nice for guys to learn about this stuff the younger they are. When you're swimming in hot girls in HS or college you have many opportunities to work on your game. My thoughts are for guys to become effectively RP so if they ever decide to get married and have kids they at least grab a high quality woman, not some crazy broken post-carousel post-wall bitch. For me, I became RP a bit late, meaning, after I was already married. I was in the process of learning when I was engaged, but it took awhile for things to really sink in.

[–]Could_have_listened7 points8 points  (2 children) | Copy

could of

Did you mean could've?


I am a bot account.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I had a lot more RP attributes while in college and never thought about it, as girls would chase me all the time. It was after I graduated that I fell into my BP ways and once I figured it out, man, it just got so much easier. Stop chasing so hard and the girls will come to you.

[–]cashmoney_x2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

What kind of stuff were you saying to the bartender in front of them for them to call you an asshole?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

Nothing crazy to thb. Just teasing her for coming to our table so much. She was laughing and having a good time the entire time. I don't even think I was being an ass, I was just teasing her, but in their eyes I crossed a line.

[–]cashmoney_x2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It's funny how they ignore her reactions.

[–]Hnikud1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

Good post OP, one question, how do you gain that abundance mentality? Also I have noticed TRP in action more and more, especially with these two classmates who let girls boss them around. Congratulations for getting this far.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

I did it by putting myself out there. I got rejected a lot at first, as girls can smell when you got no other options or don't feel confident in your game. Walk before you run. I went out with a bunch of HB5 off tinder or blind dates. Talk to girls at the bar or social situations. When you continue to go out in public and have girls seeking you out to talk you feel the abundance. I know that if I mess up with girl A, girl B is just around the corner. The other big part of it for me is that I feel great about who I am at the moment. I play guitar, have a good job, and my social circle is not bad. When you feel good about yourself girls can tell. Get active.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

how do you gain that abundance mentality

Have sex with lots of young, hot girls.

[–]K1KK0_1t41 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

How do have sex with lots of young, hot girls?

You have to gain abundance mentality.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thus fake it until you make it.

[–]theflappiestflapper1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I feel like people don't understand the concept of negging.... Its not just being a complete asshole, it's more like not being nice. Like why should you have to bend over backwards to impress or woo a girl? You should be able to do it with normal banter, which includes jokes and some humility from both sides. Guys who don't get this are nice for the purpose of sex, while guys who do are themselves for the purpose of sex and well being themselves.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

We've been taught our whole lives to treat the opposite sex special and really all they want is to be treated like everyone else. It must get exhausting to deal with beta white knights all the time. These girls take shits just like the rest of us.

[–]FujitsuOffer1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Jesus fucking titty christ. I cringed HARD when he said its not a date and he's bringing his brother. wtf?!

[–]Saiyandeus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I really enjoyed this post. It's a very generic TRP post tbh, but without the unnecessary beta bashing and wide generalizations regarding women.

[–]BIGSTEVEN19870 points1 point  (19 children) | Copy

What is TRP and the other one, NGAF, or something?

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (18 children) | Copy

TRP=The Red Pill It should have been DGAF= Don't give a fuck.

When I realized that I should just treat everyone the same and that no one person/girl is special it makes approaching easier. I've been turn down plenty, but now it doesn't sting anymore. Their lose.

[–]BIGSTEVEN19872 points3 points  (17 children) | Copy

Can I just thank you for answering my question and I hate acronyms. I never what they mean. Stupid acronyms. Sorry

[–]SolarWizard3 points4 points  (15 children) | Copy

They are initialisms not acronyms

[–]BIGSTEVEN1987-1 points0 points  (14 children) | Copy

Thanks for correcting me, it must be a real drag to constantly correct idiots like me. Thank you.

[–]SolarWizard3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

Nah I'm just trying to stoke your fire dude.

[–]BIGSTEVEN19870 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

My fires out guy but thanks

[–]foreignuserirl5 points6 points  (10 children) | Copy

dude what is your deal? you are coming off super weird

[–]BIGSTEVEN19871 point2 points  (9 children) | Copy

Thank you for that I am super weird I'm sorry I'll work on that.

[–]narref91 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

Man, if you apologize for everything you do it looks unsincere and cowardly.

I'm not saying you should never say sorry like some RP theory suggest but keep it real, only if you have really wronged someone.

[–]BIGSTEVEN19878 points9 points  (4 children) | Copy

Oh gez sorry man I didn't mean to sound "insincere" oh gez I don't know man.

[–]Dragon_Garoo0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Now you sound like morty.

Hint: Read the sidebar before reading the posts.

[–]Resource_account 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy

Reminds me of the fuckers who say sorry so damn much in rocket league.

[–]Commentor5440 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I think you may need to stop saying sorry so much. Even though I'm reading, the way it sounds it's as if you're talking really fast and nervous. Best advice is to 1) Stop apologizing so much and 2)Use punctuation to make your sentences more calm and structured instead of nervous and fast. Good luck bro

[–]lordvaderr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Damn g eventually you’ll find a new wolf pack

[–]pulsar910 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Just read the conclusion and love it!!



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