In this post I’m about to share some hard truth I learned while being here for 5 years and how to apply RP principles if you find yourself in China for a long time.

The truth is that here it pays to be clueless, or at least feign cluelessness, with women.

I take myself as an example. Myself 5 years ago: white, quite attractive (nothing special), 30 y old, average shape, average job, sharing an apartment with other people. BP as fuck but with some slight alpha traits as long as things didn’t turn into oneitis which allowed my inner beta to flourish and fuck me over.

In my first 2-3 years as a clueless chump I got laid like a rockstar. Yeah I suffered a couple of oneitis, especially the last one in the beginning of year number 3 (let’s call her Vivian) who got me here once I promised myself that the shit had to stop.

Year number 3, still deep oneitis, I slept with like 16 different girls in 6 months. Meanwhile I was reading non-stop the sub, books and all I could get my hands on. I’ve kept reading and learning for the last 2 years.

In these last 2 years I got in shape, and I mean jacked, sorted my looks, improved every single aspect I could, read book about consciousness, psychology, learned women, consolidated my career, you name it. Obviously I live alone now.

Year number 4 (way in into TRP) I had a sort of "STR" with a good quality girl, let’s call her Misty, who then left after 5 months for Europe. We knew it from the get go that she was leaving. The dynamic was great, I held frame for the whole period, we went separate ways in great terms and we’re still in touch once in a while. We still truly care about each other. Meanwhile I keep improving myself and I have a couple of other girls after she left but less than before.

Year number 5 I’m 35, best shape of my life, know my share about women, solid job, attractive, train 5 times per week, you name it. Yeah maybe I’m not extremely successful with my career but hey, it doesn’t take a whole lot to get laid in China as a westerner right? Wrong.

I go out every weekend, game girls, use 3 different dating apps. Do you want to know how many girls I slept with this year? 1 for a few times. Goddamn 1.

Impossible you say. I was a clueless beta and I was getting laid like a rockstar. Now that my SMV is like double how the hell I don’t get laid?

China.

Let me explain some realization I had this morning by connecting some dots.

When you know a girl through online dating (when you match I mean) or in person the first questions she asks you are these 2 (this is true REGARDLESS the age for about 90% of the girls/women):

*What’s your job?

*How long have you been in China?

All the time. I’m banging my head on the wall why I haven’t realized this shit before.

The first question is pretty obvious using RP lenses and I won’t go into details. The trick is about the second question.

The relationship/marriage scene in China is fucked up. I’m sure you’ve heard of leftover women which is basically the way it was in the whole world several years ago. Nothing new about that.

In China though it’s even stronger and girl are pushed to get married early and trained to be the so called “tigers” so that they become “tiger moms” which is basically a mom who squeezes the shit out of her son making them study endless hours, train them as good betas, making sure they’ll have a good career, make good money and be an excellent provider for the “tiger mom” he’s supposed to marry.

If it’s a daughter instead she has to be trained to become a new “tiger mom” so that the cycle repeats. In order to do so though the girl has to have a stronger frame than the man.

Back to the question.

How long have you been in China actually means: How many Chinese girls have you dated so far? (some girls actually ask you that directly) or even better: How much do you know about Chinese girls?

Girls here know that they are fucked up. They are attracted to foreign guys obviously, 99% of the time an average western guy is more attractive than an average Chinese guy. No offense to any Chinese guy who may be reading this. If you get pissed improve yourself already.

At the same time girls know that they need frame in order to push their plan. This means that if they see from the get go that the guy has a solid frame (like me now), and they have the intention to build a relationship (which they have because they are forced to by the family) they just move on for a maybe less attractive prospect which is hopefully more malleable.

This is the reason why with Misty the dynamic was healthy, she knew that she was supposed to leave in a few months so she wasn’t pushing any agenda on me, she was just looking to have a good time. Sex was crazy and we both enjoyed it naturally.

This is also the reason why Vivian dumped me, flipped the switch the day after and moved on in a minute. Even though I was BP as fuck I wasn’t relinquishing enough frame for her requirements, thank God. Sex was crazy as fuck until the last minute, but obviously it was just a way to lure me into her net. Bad oneitis followed.

So, to recap. From a Chinese girl’s perspective the mental process would be like this:

Vivian towards a 2 years expat:

“I have to follow this agenda which I know is fucked up. But still I have to do it. You’ve been here for a couple of years tops, this makes you still pretty much clueless, I can push my agenda then and lure you with sex so that once we’re married and you realize how things really are you’re already locked in.”

Most of the times the guy is a beta and the plan actually works. They tend to avoid guys who have been here for less than 2 years because those are the years when we play around hard.

Vivian towards a 5+ years expat:

“I have to follow this agenda which I know is fucked up. But still I have to do it. You’ve been here for a 5+ years so by this time you should know how it works, I certainly would know by now (projection). Let me test you.”

Now 2 things can happen.

Guy is BP:

“You’re still clueless so I’ll just follow the plan.”

Guy is RP and with cocky, amused mastery, alpha attitude:

“This MF knows how things work. I’m attracted to him but it’s just too much work for me. I’m very aware that all I can give him is pussy and he won’t relinquish frame anyway. I’d better not waste my time and find a more malleable prospect, clock is ticking.”

Pay attention, this is true for the big part of the SMP since most Chinese girls have to get married. If a guy has high to very high SMV things may be different and I have no experience about it (not yet at least).

Conclusion: In China it pays to be clueless. If you are clueless you’re going to get burned. If you fake it you’re going to enjoy and you will know exactly when it’s time to flip the switch. Always say you’ve been here for a couple of years, by the time they realized you lied about it they’re already invested a lot to just leave. Or at least fake cluelessness. Since you know it’s all smoke you then have the chance to go to the next prospect but at least you were fully prepared since the beginning.

Side note: Forget about the young 9s and 10s Chinese girls. They are usually making money on their looks. They may be attracted to you but if their circle knows they're dating a foreigner they'll be shamed and obviously done with their career of gold-diggers.

This is the way I see it now, I may be wrong and if I am please enlighten me.