Summery: Posted in Frat and was greeted by a fantastic chain of messages giving me advice on how to better myself in time for college

Body: So, I am 18 years old and currently in the process of what I want to do in my life. One of my options is attending college out in America, in order to gain more experience I posed the question in the frat section of reddit. This was predictably followed by a range of sarcastic response with highlights such as "Don't fuck the goat" and "Jack of twice a day". However two days after the post I received a chain of messages that seemed to be too beneficial to be wasted on just me alone so I though it may be worth posting here as I feel it can help people of all ages in all areas of their lives.

Here are my suggestions: 1. Work on your cardiac fitness and on your resistive (weight training) muscle strength and definition. Fraternity culture is active – in the extreme. Most Brothers played high school varsity sports before college. Brothers are at the peak of their physical strength and endurance, and much of their culture is active. You can expect morning runs with your Pledge Class. You can expect weekend trips after Initiation - hiking, mountain climbing, skiing and snowboarding, surfing, water skiing. You can expect frequent pickup games of basketball, flag football. You can expect the Chapter to field teams in a number of intramural sports (club level competitions between organizations on campus in a number of different sports). You can expect many of the Brothers to spend time in the gym, building their strength, endurance, and appearance. Appearance is part of athletic training as well. As a Fraternity man, you will be mixing with and dating the most desirable, smartest, most beautiful, most charming girls on campus – and those girls are quite accustomed to having it all – a smart guy who looks good and who is good to the core. I browsed your posting history and see that you are a fan of the US Marine Corps HITT system. If that works for you, that’s great. But you should know that the Marine Corps cares nothing about how its warriors look – they care only about strength and endurance. Most studies show that to build muscle mass, you should use small numbers of high resistance lifts, executed slowly up and slowly down, each set to muscle failure, with three sets, the latter two of progressively decreasing weight. So, for mass and appearance (not body building, just for a buffed masculine look with big shoulders and arms, a thicker neck, domed pecs, and a big drop to a scaphoid abdomen, with a big back accented by a prominent lumbar lordosis, and with tree trunk legs – well that requires high resistance, low reps, slowly executed, each set to failure. I use a system where if I can pump 20 reps, I raise the resistance; if I cannot pump 10 reps, I lower the weight. An in-house BowFlex is ideal for these exercises. A cheap, used StairMaster works perfectly for cardio, and has the additional benefit of toning glutes. Having a buffed masculine body promotes confidence, justly earned confidence, and helps spark a Command Presence without cockiness or bullying. You should look good in shorts without your shirt. I understand from your posts that you have the natural body of a cross-country runner – an ectomorph. To muscle-up, you will need not only resistive weight training, but also the focused nutrition to build muscle – protein and amino acids, along with raw carbs for energy. Much of what I use is from the Body for Life series. Body for Life recommends, when building muscle – five small meals daily. Each mean has a fist sized portion of lean protein (grilled chicken or pork), a raw fruit (apple, pear, banana), a protein bar (I like Balance Bars’ Honey Yogurt Peanut flavor), and a liter of water. In addition, very soon after each weight training session (less than 30 minutes after), the body needs a protein shake like Met-Rx. Daily, you need a double dose of a regular over the counter multivitamin – like Centrum. Take the vitamin with food, otherwise it may upset your stomach.

I read you have acne problems; many teenagers do. Acne is really toxic to your social life. Deal with it now, once and for all. You should read about Accutane (it may be marketed under a different name in the UK).http://www.acne.org/accutane.html Accutane is controversial because it is not perfectly safe – it can have effects on the liver – and you cannot drink alcohol while on Accutane. But if you took Accutane now, and it dramatically cleared your acne before you landed on an American college campus, you might be able to discontinue the Accutane long before leaving the UK, and if your liver enzymes were still normal, you should be able to enjoy a moderate amount of alcohol – certainly enough to get you relaxed and playful. I’ve never understood the desire to drink to blackout. Drinking to blackout means your BAL is high enough that the alcohol shuts down all activity in your brain’s hippocampus – which is required for creating new memories. The reason blackout drunk never remember the night they over-enjoyed is that their brain literally stopped creating the memories – and so the memory of the epic night can never be recovered. Why would you want to intentionally deprive yourself of memory of the best nights of your life? Read up on Accutane, and if you and your parents agree, it would be a very wise investment in your future social life, confidence, and appearance.

If you have dental problems, get them fixed. A straight white smile is affable and attractive. Professional tooth whitening sessions work extremely well. If your teeth are crooked, investigate the Invisalign Systemhttp://www.invisalign.com of clear plastic dental forms – you should have time over the next two years for Invisalign to work miracles if your teeth are misaligned.

Start experimenting with different haircuts. Grow out your hair for a month, then go to a different barber and bring pictures of what you want. Most Fraternity men have thick, short hair – a bit longer than a military officer – but never buzz cut like in Boot Camp. Longer hair is good if it is thick and has natural body to it. But your hair should be off your collar and your sideburns should not extend below the middle of your ear canal. You want a clean-cut, traditional, preppy look. No facial fair. No back hair. Trim, but do not shave your pubes (called trimming the hedges) – makes your dick look longer. If your legs and butt are exceedingly hairy, trim that hair as well – too much hair hides the muscle definition you are striving to create. I’m not talking about shaving your body, and I’m not talking about being a shredded bodybuilder – but rather a clean, buffed look.

If you have piercings, remove them now and let the pierced holes heal over.

If you have tattoos, finish what you have started, but add no new tattoos. If you regret tattoos you have, have them removed with laser, now, before college. In the US, a single small tattoo is common, but many tattoos or sleeves are marks of gang culture or prison culture.

Stop wearing jewelry – no class ring, no religious necklace, nothing. Your Pledge Pin, and later your Fraternity Badge should be all you wear until you wear a wedding band, unless you are a titled Peer, able to honorably wear a signet ring with your Crest.

Most American Fraternities were born in the mid to late 19th Century, and many of their secret rituals reflect themes that resonate in Freemasonry as well. Most Fraternities will require you, as a condition of your Initiation, to honorably acknowledge a belief in God, though exactly what that means is left to your conscience and soul. Most American college Fraternity men are not fervently religious, most do not attend weekly church services, though most were raised in a Catholic or Protestant Church, and most believe in a New Testament version of God. If this strikes you as problematic, you should find a copy of the now out-of-print, The Hiram Key, and read about the history of religion and of freemasonry. http://www.amazon.com/The-Hiram-Key-Freemasons-Discovery/dp/1931412758 It’s a remarkable book and gives a broad and convincing overview of how we came to believe what we believe – along with some well documented stunning surprises. America’s Founding Fathers had a very different understanding of religion and God than is common today. They were men of the Enlightenment, and they believed that the Laws of the physical universe – gravity, physics, chemistry – that these were all manifestations of God. They did not believe in a supernatural corporeal being in the Heavens. You will have to come to your own beliefs – that is part of becoming an adult. But you will be required to honorably attest to a belief in a higher power, whatever that means to you. The book I suggested, may help.

I noticed you browsed the Red Pill subreddit. While Red Pill philosophy is sometimes useful in thinking about what it means to be a man, how to bond with other guys, and how to enjoy dating and mating with girls, and how to do those things successfully, most Fraternity guys consider even uttering the name Red Pill or Sexual Market Value to tag you as a goober, who thinks too much about things and does too little about things. I find nothing wrong with analysis and thought – but action has to follow. Let whatever lessons you learn from Red Pill philosophy inform your actions – but make sure there are actions. Learn to approach and dialogue pretty girls at parties. The key is talking with them without a second agenda – talking with them without the intent of talking them into bed that night. Girls are smart too – and they can sense when they are being played. They can also sense when a guy is genuine and fun and easy to talk with. Be that guy.

Reading material: a. The Hiram Key b. How to Win Friends and Influence People c. The Greatest Salesman in the World – the Scrolls d. Atlas Shrugged

Be smart. Take challenging classes now, and excel in them. Most Fraternity guys are smart, and they excelled academically in high school before coming to college. Every Fraternity has rigid rules requiring a minimum Grade Point Average in order to be Initiated and another minimum Grade Point Average to continue to be an Active Brother. I don’t know whether the “Advanced Placement” system of more rigorous courses in available in the UK. In the US, if you take one of these AP courses in high school, and make at least 3/5 on the Final Exam (the Advanced Placement Test), then you get college credit for the course and you do not have to take the course again in college. Placing out of freshmen English would be a HUGE help to your freshman year in college. There are also AP courses here in physics, American history, world history, calculus, biology, and others. The more AP credits you are able to apply to your freshman year, the more interesting your more advanced college classes will be, and you will be freed from the drudgery of some introductory college level courses, like freshman English.

Do you know which college you want to attend? Fraternity culture is most developed in the Southern United States, at flagship State University campuses. The SEC athletic conference and the ACC athletic conference of colleges have some of the best college fraternities anywhere: a. University of Virginia - Charlottesville b. University of North Carolina – Chapel Hill c. University of Florida d. Florida State University e. University of Alabama – Tuscaloosa f. University of Mississippi – Oxford g. Louisiana State University – Baton Rouge h. University of Texas – Austin i. Oklahoma State University – Stillwater j. University of Tennessee – Knoxville k. Arizona State University l. Clemson University

Ignore Fraternity Satire sites like Total Frat Move, and Old Row. They are intended to be jokes for those inside the culture – Fratire – but students outside the culture, particularly high school students have come to believe TFM is an accurate portray of fraternity life. TFM is a parody, a wildly exaggerated satire. Don’t be misled.

I noticed you hoped to travel through Asia before college. Asian culture is very collective – almost “hive mind” collective. If you bring a hive mind collective personal philosophy to an American Fraternity’s front porch, they will be aggressively unimpressed. Fraternity culture is a wildly competitive meritocracy; Brothers compete on everything, and individual freedom and individual liberty are prized above almost all else. Asian philosophy is almost incompatible with Fraternity culture.

You should know, if you don’t already, that Fraternity culture in these big flagship universities, is not very diverse; it is instead one of the more ethnocentric cultures on campus. While Fraternity men do not consider themselves racist or homophobic, 95% of Fraternity men on these campuses will be straight, white middle class or upper class guys. Fraternities are often the undeserving targets of social justice warriors protesting on campus. If wide cultural diversity is important to you, you will certainly find campus groups that pride themselves on that value, but traditional Fraternities will not be one of those groups. If you’ve found any of this helpful, I’m happy to continue to answer questions and provide a perspective from this side of the pond. I took a few courses at Kings College Medical School in London, and I understand some of the sometimes surprising cultural differences. Hope to hear from you again, Robin Goodfellow aka Puck

Just thought a message of this magnitude was too good to waste on me alone, and I am aware that a lot of the stuff on here is tailored somewhat to the older guys, so I thought this could be beneficial to some people who have not yet made the mistake of wasting college on a LTR.

All credit belongs to u/RobinIsAGoodFellow for going above and beyond the call duty. Still can't believe someone would go into this much detail for some random on the internet. Can't tell you how much I appreciate it :)