The Prophecy



'Twas a morning like any other.

I walk out onto the deck in my robe and house slippers, inhaling the fresh air of oppression. Basking in the sun's light, my male privilege shines in all it's glory. My body radiates a humming aura of superiority.

With my right hand, I take a puff of my cigar, exhaling the smoke into the ether.

With my other hand, I take a savory sip of female tears acquired by last night's festivities.

(shivers with pleasure)

It's a beautiful day. Praise thee for being a cis male.

The deck then begins to shake, and I hear the all too familiar muffled cries from the chamber below.

One of my sex slaves must have broken out of her kennel... again.

Gotta new batch of bitches from the Gender Studies department yesterday. Justin Timberlake is right, it's better to kidnap them.

"I have a bucket of male tears in the van, would you like some? Don't worry, it's a safe-space." (Works every time)

They're hot, but have too many dumb thoughts swirling in their pea brains from too many years of progressive liberal arts edumacation by manhating dykes. They need to be broken in. They need to know their place.

(muffled cries)

I dont want to hear this shit in the morning. I'm manitating, dammit.

They need a real education. A full-ride scholarship to Submission University. Majoring in pain and suffering.

I collect myself, then pray the Pimp's Prayer.

As I bend down to unlock the dungeon hatch, a peculiar sight catches the eye.

What in Brodin's steel earth is that?

I finish my drink, then descend into the yard to investigate.

Upon reaching the site, I clear the glowing stone of leaves, scraping away the dirt that surrounds it. I've seen to come across an ancient artifact.

Is this a stone tablet?

I unearth the finding and gently brush the dirt off the surface with my fingertips to reveal its writing. This seems to be written in ManSplaining.

And it read thus...

"Women know not their folly and thus must be led by superior man. They shall be corralled and used for his pleasure, for woman was designed for the pleasure and multiplication of man. It is through man that woman achieves purpose.

Her vagina meant for the penetration of man and the secretion of the next generation of females to defile and the next generation of sons to continue the legacy of oppression. Her uterus meant to be plump with seed. Her breasts meant for nourishment of child and the groping of man. Her mouth meant to sound submissive utterances, feeding unborn child, and the engulfment of cock. Her brain, one step lower than man, meant to relate with child, yet one step above it to tend to its immediate needs.

Any woman that yet draws breath with no child suckling upon the teet that refuses the revealment and caressing of her breasts by willing man in her vicinity, has committed a sin against The Patriarchy. To repent for her sins, she shall undergo Honor Groping.

Any woman that yet draws breath not undergoing child birth that refuses the filling of the void between her thighs to willing man in her vicinity, has committed a sin against The Patriarchy. To repent for her sins, she shall undergo Honor Rape.

Woman's proper place being under the heel of man; So it is.

Viva la Patriarchy.

In the year 2016, a young, handsome, disciple of Brodin of the Warlock clan will stumble upon the Sacred Tablet. He will then descend from the mountains of enlightenment, back doen to Earth, spreading the message of Lord Patriarch to mankind. The Warlock will take humanity under his wing and guide them to the Promise Land."

 - The Holy Tablets of Patriarchal Revelation 

This is my Call of Duty. I will complete my mission at any cost. I will make my ancestors proud.


Thus spoke, Zarawarlock

"Brothers and sisters, gather around. Hear me, for the Spirit of Patriarchy speaks through me. The Holy Texts have designated I, dr_warlock, to spread the message of divination. I am the chosen one!

All yee who listen, listen well. Those who don't follow the righteous path of female oppression cannot be guaranteed to be saved during the great Rapeture, when the benevolent Lord Patriarch descends from the heavens to cast Judgement upon humanity.

Men, rape with purpose. Love thy neighbor by sharing your female captives.

Women, submit to willing man. Give into his desires and listen to command.

Humanity, go forth and multiply.

Upon doomsday, true believers will be saved and taken to the Promise Land. Men will be greeted with 72 unwilling virgins to defile. Women will have The Wall removed, and shall remain no more than 25 yrs of age! But the unrepentant sinners will suffer eternal damnation.

I pray for you. I pray for you all. I pr--"

Big Titty Harlot: "dr_warlock, please save me. Use my body to keep you alive!"

dr_warlock: "(Chuckle) Gooood. Gooood, girl. Yes, my dear. I will gladly fill you with purpose."

(coitus, thrusting)

And in the point of no return, Thus spoke Zarawarlock

"This shall mark the beginning of the end brothers and sisters!"

(Zarawarlock's balls, on the brink of rupture, empty out of his sperm cannon with a mighty thunder, shooting out the Harlot's mouth. He howls into the night. His orgasm so glorious, Montezuma gave up his revenge. With The Sorcerer's seed coursing through her veins, the saved Harlot collapses and dies from internal bleeding and tingles overdose, marking the first step for humanity.)

and Zarawarlock said on to them, still inside the limp Harlot, screaming his passion out to the sky

"Viiiivaaa laa Paaatriiiarrrchyyy!"

The crowd cheers in a mighty roar, then disperses to carry out their mission. The Crusade has begun.

Lessons Learned: Rape

The End