Scarcity vs. Abundance: A dialogue

Scarcity: "Bro, WHY are you in an LTR?"

Abundance: "Why not?"

Scarcity: "Don't you know that women are awful!"

Abundance: "The one I am with isn't awful."

Scarcity: "Yeah, you say that now. How will you feel when she DUMPS YOU!"

Abundance: "I will feel that we had a good time together, but now it's time to move on. There are millions of women in the world. Now that I'm single I get to have fun meeting and sleeping with someone new. It feels like I've got a great opportunity to have some fun!"

Scarcity: "If you feel that way, why are you even in a relationship?"

Abundance: "I enjoy sex, but it isn't my life purpose. Being in a relationship is simpler, and it offers better companionship and intimacy. It takes care of my sexual needs and allows me to focus on other things I care about more, like my work, hobbies, and friends."

Scarcity: "Well, how would you feel if she cheated on you?"

Abundance: "I'd feel the same way. It's a chance to meet someone new and have some fun with them. Shit happens, no point in feeling sorry for yourself. Just move on and find someone new."

Scarcity: "Don't you have any self respect?"

Abundance: "Of course I have self respect, it just isn't dependent on the actions of a woman."

Scarcity: "Are you nuts? I said she's going to CHEAT ON YOU BRO! "

Abundance: "If it happens it happens. It's not that big of a deal. Life goes on. Plenty of fish in the sea."

Scarcity: "Wtf do you mean it's not a big deal? You invested all this time and effort into her!"

Abundance: "It wasn't an investment... I was with her because I enjoyed being with her, and she enjoyed being with me. Why would I be in a relationship with someone if it felt like work? That doesn't make much sense."

Scarcity: "Yeah but you spend YEARS with her and now it's all gone to NOTHING!"

Abundance: "What exactly was it supposed to lead to? Your attitude doesn't really make sense. Should I stop playing sports because one day I will be too old to play? Of course not. I am enjoying myself in the moment, not investing for the future. Relationships are meant to be enjoyed in the same way as any other activity."

Scarcity: "Bullshit. I know you've done things with her you didn't want to do. I know you've spent money on her. That's investment."

Abundance: "Well, for the most part we did activities together that we both enjoy. We both like to eat out. We both like to go on vacations. We both like the outdoors. Sure, sometimes I did things that only she wanted to do, but by the same token she sometimes did activities that only I wanted to do. That's a fair exchange that all friends make, not a long-term investment."

Scarcity: "Still, you are doing all this work when it would be so much easier to be single."

Abundance: "I already explained it isn't work. But seeking sex while single definitely is work, to me. You have to go out, make yourself look good, socialize with tons of people, many of whom you don't really like, have to maintain frame, deal with shit-tests, have to deal with dozens of flaking women... I understand a lot of guys enjoy that, and I say go for it. Personally, that feels like much more work than spending time with someone I like and getting sex any time I like."

Scarcity: "You know what's even easier? MGTOW. I've given up women completely, they aren't worth the effort!"

Abundance: "Really? I'm sorry you feel that way. Women and sex are a lot of fun. I don't see what is so terrible. But to each their own I suppose."

Scarcity: "Nah bro, they really are horrible creatures! You can't see it because you are so thirsty for sex."

Abundance: "I think it's only natural for men to desire sex, and only natural for them to seek to fulfill that desire. I think you are making the wrong decision."

Scarcity: "WOW BRO. Going MGTOW is my personal choice! Why do you care? Why are you trying to enforce your lifestyle on me? Are you some kind of sperg?"

Abundance: "Weren't you just trying to persuade me not to be in an LTR?"

Scarcity: "Yeah but that's different... Women are clearly not worth the effort and you are making a huge mistake. You will realize it one day."

Abundance: "I have a feeling you might have some emotional issues that are clouding your judgement..."

Scarcity: "Oh yeah? Like what."

The Great MGTOW Hamster

By MGTOW, I'm referring to men who have made the choice to be fully celibate and have given up women/relationships altogether, not men who simply avoid commitment.

There are two general types of MGTOW. The first type are men who have had at least moderate success with women. They've done their approaches, they've spun plates, they've gotten lots of sex, and they've gotten intimacy. They've achieved a basic level of self-esteem and confidence in their person and in their abilities with women. In other words, they have worked their way up the steps on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, had those needs fulfilled, and are ready to take the next step forward, towards self-actualization.

The second type of MGTOW has not had success with women. He's still struggling with that first step on Maslow's stairs. Maybe he did get sex, and felt like he was having some success with women... until he got dumped, or cheated on, or divorced, or rejected by his One. He hasn't gotten lots of sex, and he hasn't gotten the intimacy he desires. His self-esteem is still lacking and craving validation. These MGTOWs have decided they can simply cheat the game, leap over a few steps on the hierarchy of needs and go straight to self-actualization. You can find these men whining on the internet about how horrible modern women are and how they just aren't worth the effort. This rant is directed exclusively towards this second type of MGTOW.

I want you to go back and read Confessions of a Reformed Incel. After you have read it, I want you to imagine an alternative ending. Instead of the guy finally taking action, and breaking through, and reaching his goals, I want you to imagine he decided that women just weren't worth the effort. Imagine he went full MGTOW.

The story doesn't quite have the emotional bang to it anymore, does it? Rather than a story of a man who faced his demons and triumphed over them, it becomes a story of a man who settled into the fact that they probably couldn't or shouldn't be defeated, and so he better get used to them.

It isn't that the MGTOW's ego fears rejection on the thought of approaching women (it does), it's that their brilliant brain has simply done a complicated cost-benefit analysis and logically concluded that approaching doesn't make any rational sense! Gee-golly!

If you still think your "logical" faculties are independent and disconnected from your emotions and fears, you've got a lot more reading to do on basic psychology.

And thus, we reach the core of what this second type of MGTOW is really all about: the Great Male Hamster of our time. It is a psychological defense mechanism, designed to shield their ego from the fear of rejection, or the fear of being cheated on or dumped, or from the painful thought that no woman will want them. It is a rationalization which protects their laziness and passivity in the face of a difficult challenge. It is a form of sexual repression. It is beta hopelessness, embraced.

Like an addict, professing they can quit any time they want (they just don't WANT to), the MGTOW hamster will tell you he could get women any time he wants, if he tried. Their failures with women stopped being failures the moment they labeled it a choice.

If you lose in a video game, you say the other guy has no life. And if you lose in the sexual game, you say the other guy is "thirsty" and "too stupid" to see that women just aren't worth the effort. You imagine him getting false rape accusations, imagine him desperate for validation, imagine him marrying the bitch and getting the divorce rape he deserves. It's a kid losing at chess telling himself the game is for nerds and losers. Hamster.

There is a reason Freud saw sex behind everything. And there is a reason sex is on the lowest rung of Maslow's hierarchy of needs. The sexual urge is the most fundamental to life's existence, it is the grandfather of all impulses. From an evolutionary perspective, nothing is more important.

I'm not telling you your purpose in life is to get laid. I'm only telling you not to suppress or deny your own natural desires and impulses. I'm telling you to face reality and your nature rather than hiding from it to protect your ego. If you are a healthy adult male you ought to have the urge to meet women, and so long as you have that urge, you ought to act on it. You can imagine alllll those men out there in the sexual marketplace are all getting false rape accusations, and having their sperm stolen and inseminated into a psycho-bitch succubus to extort child support from them, and being drugged and having their spleens ripped out and sold on the black market... But that's not really what you are afraid of. You are afraid of rejection. You are afraid that no one will want you. You are afraid of the work and discipline it will take to get there. It's your ego and laziness that is in fear, not your wallet.

So long as it remains the thing that deep-down you know you can't have, the pussy will remain on that pedestal, no matter how hard you try to pull it off or cover it up. Repression is not the answer. So start taking action, overcome your fears, instill self-discipline, and become a well-rounded, less bitter man.

Or not. It's your life.