TLDR: Most of the misunderstandings between men and women can be summed up with "Men Solve,Women affirm". What is right or wrong largely depends on your perspective,viewpoint or frame. The biggest problem men have is they are assuming that women have the same frame as they do. This leads to all sorts of problems, misunderstandings and frustration.
hypocognition is a phenomenon which decribes the lack of ideas or concepts to express an idea. It is essenmatially invisible, many cultures suffer from this. In this case, most men suffer from the inability to see the woman's frame. An analogy is, a fish can not see water.
We discuss this idea, and then hopefully at then end of the post you will be able to create strategies to solve this problem.
Excerpt
The biggest mistake men make when dealing with women is this. Men want someone to help them solve their problems, women want someone to listen to their problems. When my psychologist friend told me this, I was perplexed, why would you tell someone your problems if you didn’t want help solving them ? To answer that question, we will have to take a few detours before we can get to the answer. This will then lead us to several conclusions.
My friend, who had over 40+ years of practical experience in the field, said next time when you are observing two women or more talking with each other, stop talking, shut down your brain and listen to what they are actually saying. As in, instead of thinking of how you will counter their arguments, pay attention and listen.Most people, instead of changing their belief system to fit the facts, change the facts to fit their belief system. Taleb in his book Antifragile: Things That Gain from Disorder compares this to Procrustes a mythical Greek innkeeper who would stretch or cut off the legs of his guests so they would fit into his beds perfectly. He gives example of how highly intelligent people including scientists are subconsciously do this.
Read more here
http://acrackletsthelightin.info/2016/05/04/Men-Solve-Women-Affirm/
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