r/AmItheAsshole•Posted byu/RolandRoad6 hours ago

WIBTA if I asked my ex to pay me back the money she owes me now that we’ve broken up?

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So last month my ex, who I’ve been dating for nearly a year, broke up with me. It was a complete blindside – I thought everything was great and we were talking about getting an apartment together next year. Then we went to a party where she saw her most recent ex. A few days later she told me that he talked to her that night and said he realized how bad he fucked up when he saw her with another guy (me). He’s now ready to give up his vices for her, and she’s sorry but she still loves him enough to want to give their relationship another try.

I was shocked and hurt as hell but what can I do, I can’t force her to stay. I was miserable for weeks but now I just want to settle things and move on, and one of the things that need to be settled is the four thousand dollars that she owes me.

We never talked about how or when she would pay me. Back then all I thought of was that she was my girlfriend, she needed money for a valid reason, and I had money to spare. I wanted to take care of her problem because I wanted to take care of her. I told her to pay me when she had money, and she has been paying me a couple hundred dollars every now and then. I was fine with that because she was my girlfriend but it’s not something that I would do for everyone.

Now that we’re no longer together, I’ve been thinking about asking her to pay me the four grand by the end of the year. I know it sounds petty but honestly now that she’s no longer with me and given the circumstances of our breakup I don’t feel as inclined to be lenient to her with my money as I did before. I also want a clean break so I can totally move on from all of this. I don’t like the idea that I’ll still have some sort of communication or connection to her for the next few years if it takes that long for her to pay me.

I’m willing to listen and ready for your judgment.